The Courtship of Toothless Chapter 7

New-night-fury and Night-fury-mother-of-twins were gone for the day. They'd agreed to check up on the nest in Dragon Island and say 'hello' to all their friends there, so Toothless and Guana could use the Nest for as long as they wanted. Toothless didn't seem to want to use it for very long.

"I think we should go back to the cove, and resume your lessons there," he decided.

"Why?" Guana asked.

"Do I have to explain my every thought?" he retorted.

"It would be nice if you'd explain a few of your thoughts," she shot back. "That's how friends treat each other."

After a long pause, Toothless sat down. He gazed at her until she sat as well.

"For one thing," he began, "the cove is a natural place, with rocks and trees and water and grass. This building is a nice place to live, but there aren't many places like it in the world. You're going to make a lot more take-offs and landings in natural places than in places like this, so the cove is a better place to get used to.

"For another thing, this village has a lot going on. It has Vikings coming and going, it has dragons doing this and that, and all that action is only going to make things harder for you. I know you have trouble keeping your eyes on where you're going. Until you learn some inner discipline, you're going to have a hard time flying straight, and trying to learn in a busy village will be even harder. I think a nice, quiet cove will be the perfect place for you."

"Are those the only reasons?" she asked, cocking her head.

"Well... the other reason is just that I love it there. That was where I first met Hiccup, that was where I taught him and Astrid to fly, and that was where I met you. I'll take any excuse to spend more time there."

She nodded. "I appreciate your honesty. Were you always this honest with Hiccup?"

"Yes," he answered without hesitation. "We shared TrueSight quite often, and you can't lie to someone when he can see all your emotions. Besides, I never wanted to lie to him. It was too important to me that he know the whole truth, so he could adjust to his new life. And, of course, he was my friend. Aside from the Night Fury who transformed me and taught me, Hiccup was the only true friend I'd ever had up until then. He asked for all the facts, and he got them.

"Astrid was convinced I was lying to her in some way. I suppose it was due to some anti-dragon propaganda they'd fed her in the village. She took a lot longer to adjust, and a lot longer to accept who she was. I can't say for certain if she'd go back to being human if she could. If she had the chance and declined it, it would probably be because of Hiccup. He'd never go back. I knew that about him from the moment I first considered transforming him."

"I still have a problem with you forcing that on them," she said evenly.

Toothless looked at her thoughtfully, and finally said, "You're looking at things from a completely unique perspective – you're the only human in history who willingly chose to become a dragon. Every other Night Fury who was transformed, and that includes me, had it forced on them and had to adjust to it.

"How is that so different from any other destiny, Guana?

"Do you resent your parents for birthing you in the Northland, instead of someplace with a more pleasant climate? Do you resent the gods for making you a girl, in a culture that favors men? Do you resent the dragons for starting the fire that injured you and disfigured you? You didn't choose any of those fates; they were forced on you, and you had to adjust to them.

"In the same way, Hiccup never asked to be thin and thoughtful in a world that favors beefy and blunt. Astrid never asked to be pretty in a culture that equates 'pretty' with 'marriage bait' and nothing more. They both worked hard to deal with those fates, and they dealt with becoming dragons as well. The only difference between the way they were born and their becoming Night Furies is that their transformation was an act of my will, rather than an accident or a coincidence of destiny.

"So ask yourself, Guana – am I a villain because I did what I did? If you asked Hiccup, he'd say no; he's thanked me repeatedly for transforming him, and he's repaid me several times over with good things in return, so I'd know he was truly thankful even if there was no such thing as TrueSight. If you asked Astrid... as I said, I'm not completely sure she'd stay a dragon if she had the choice. But she's become a fine dragon, a superb leader, a wonderful mate for Hiccup, an excellent mother to her children, and a good friend to me. She's fully embraced what she is. In a word, she's happy. You can't convince me that I did her wrong."

"Couldn't you have asked them in advance?" Guana asked, not sounding so sure of herself.

"How?" Toothless countered. "We didn't speak each other's language. I'd learned to understand a few words from Hiccup, but I couldn't speak or write Old Norse, and he could never understand the speech of dragons – human ears aren't sensitive enough. There was no possible way I could have made my intentions known to them.

"Besides that, please understand – transforming them didn't do me any good at all. It was for the Night Furies as a species, not for me. The instant Hiccup became a dragon, I lost my rider, couldn't fly, and was as good as dead. It was only because Hiccup used his own transformation to heal my tail that I'm sitting here in front of you, instead of decorating some Viking's wall with my head."

"Hiccup did a transformation on you?" Guana hadn't heard that part of the story.

"Yes, and he didn't ask my consent about it, either. I almost bit him before I realized what he'd done for me. He did it for the same reason I did it – to benefit the Night Furies, and because he knew I'd appreciate it."

"This whole thing is a lot more complicated than I thought it was," she said, shaking her head.

"It's called 'life'," Toothless replied. "Up until very recently, life was pretty simple for you – food, sleep, sheep, and pain. You didn't have the luxury of pondering heavy-duty questions of right and wrong. Everything is different now, and that includes the way you think. The more time you spend as a dragon, the more you'll think like a dragon, even though you'll never lose your personality or your memories.

"Instead of rushing to judge me, would you be willing to learn to fly instead? It would be a much better use of your time. Your ideas of whether I'm good or evil are going to change with time anyway, so why are you in a hurry to reach a verdict on whether I'm a hero or a monster?"

"Are you trying to change the subject?" Guana demanded.

"We could settle this whole question if you'd be willing to look in my eyes for a moment," Toothless replied softly.

Guana thought about that. "It's impossible for us to lie to each other that way?"

"Impossible," he nodded. "Some dragons with strong wills can emphasize or minimize certain emotions that they're feeling, but it's impossible to hide them completely, or to fake a feeling that isn't really there. If you agree to share TrueSight with me, you'll get a complete picture of everything that I'm feeling."

"All right," she said slowly, and looked into his eyes.

It wasn't nearly as jarring this time, because she had an idea of what to expect. Toothless was almost completely focused on her – her need to learn all the things that dragons do, from flying to mingling in dragon society. Nearly as important to him was his desire that she like him. It was plain that he liked her, a lot – not quite as much as he liked Hiccup, but more than Astrid or anyone else.

"That's not what I thought passionate love would look like," she said after a few seconds.

"Dragons don't have passionate love," Toothless answered, very self-consciously. "Either we like someone or we don't. If we do, and the other dragon is of the opposite sex, there can be an attraction if mating season is near. But it's not like human love at all." He paused. "At least, that's the theory. Unfortunately, that theory has gone up in flames in my case, because I've spent so much time with humans and dragons-who-used-to-be-humans. You've ruined me! Well, maybe not, but you could say you've transformed me. What you saw in me probably doesn't look a bit like what you'd see in any other dragon."

"Maybe," she shrugged, "but I know one thing for sure. I didn't see anything cruel, or selfish, or any of the other things I've been accusing you of. I'm still not sure how to think about you, but the way I was thinking about you was wrong. I'm sorry."

"Apology accepted," he nodded. "Shall we go back to the cove and try some basic flying lessons?"

"Do we really have to start from the beginning?" she asked sadly.

"You can't unlearn what you already know," he answered. "You're a fast learner, maybe faster than Hiccup was, but you have got to learn some discipline! At the very least, you need to learn to look by moving your eyes, not your whole head."

"But there's so much to see!" she exclaimed. "I'm seeing things I've never seen before; how can I not look? Maybe my troubles will fade after the novelty of being a dragon wears off?"

Toothless had to smile. "No, that won't happen. The thrill of flying, and the joy of seeing things from above... those delights never wear off."

They took off together and glided toward the cove. She went off course only once – all right, twice – and that was because she was looking at Toothless.