"How come our teacher is so tiny?" Naruto exclaims, pointing rudely at the masked gray-haired boy dressed entirely in navy. He stands in front of three taller, older kids who have got to be the other Jōnin teachers, Asuma, Gai, and Kurenai. "Did he like get an extra hit of it or something?"
One of the other rejuvenated teachers, presumably Asuma, since he's not sporting a bowl cut like the other boy, stuffs a snicker behind a palm slapped hurriedly over his mouth. The only girl-kid elbows him in the side as Sakura's insides constrict with anxiety.
Sakura lowers her gaze to Kakashi-Sensei to find that his eyes are slanted into a deeply unimpressed look. "I'm not little," he huffs. Then, giving them all a once-over, declares, "I outrank all of you."
Naruto gasps loudly but he's not the only one who is startled. The other teams are shifting and murmuring exclamations as well. Sakura's anxiety has made her stomach so small it is a stone. A stone that careens around; pummeling her middle and causing pain. She attempts to soothe it by wrapping her arms around herself.
She looks over Kakashi-Sensei for a second time. Their teacher can't be older than six or seven right now. Who let him even graduate from the Academy? Let alone promote him past Genin?
"What? No way!" her idiot-teammate decries.
Kakashi-Sensei nods once. "I'mma Chūnin," he proclaims with clear smugness in his piping little boy voice.
"Oh brother," mutters Asuma. His fingers have interlocked above his head; creating a tent over the top of his crown as his eyes find the ceiling. Sakura barely hears him over the gasps and squawks of her peers that resound through the room.
She is outside herself now. This is too much and her control has slipped from her. Unbidden, from Sakura's lips slips a shrill "you're kidding".
Gai laughs at her words and puts a bandage-wrapped hand on Kakashi-Sensei's shoulder (which the smaller immediately shakes off). "My rival is telling the truth! He is a very talented shinobi," the boy praises.
Out of the corner of her eye, Sakura sees Sasuke square his shoulders and tilt his head. She does not like that. It is both an infuriatingly cocky and dangerous response. What is he thinking right now?
"Yeah?" he says. "Let's test that talent with a spar."
She stiffens in shock while Gai's long, black lashes flutter. "Ah!" the green-clad preteen exclaims. "That may not be—"
"Bet you're less of a challenge than Crybaby Obito," Kakashi-Sensei sneers as he steps away from the other three kids and towards Sasuke.
Sakura, frozen with doubts and fears, watches in horror as Sasuke cracks his knuckles. "Oh I'll show you," he hisses.
Unlike Sakura, Tenten isn't afraid and jumps between Kakashi-Sensei and Sasuke. She thrusts out her hands, forcing them to keep their distance from one another. She suggests in a falsely jovial tone, "Hey, hey, let's calm down guys."
"Butt out," snaps Sasuke; his eyes fixed on Kakashi-Sensei who's puffed out his cheeks in a very childish display of irritation.
Neji comes to the defense of his teammate and grabs Sasuke by the arm. He yanks him away from both Tenten and Kakashi-Sensei. "Don't talk to her like that!" Neji snarls, his fingers creating deep ripples in the fabric of Sasuke's detached sleeves.
Sasuke bumps chests with Neji and demands, "You want to go too, Hyuga?"
The older boy falls back, feet shifting into a battle-ready stance. Sasuke copies it and Sakura opens her mouth to yell at them both to stop it. However, before she can release the bellow building in her lungs, Kurenai grabs Kakashi-Sensei by the back of the neck. She then forces him to retreat to where the rest of the newly young teachers are huddled together.
"Look at what you've done, Kakashi," she scolds.
Everyone's attention is once more captured by the rejuvenated Jōnin. Kakashi-Sensei kicks a little foot and looks away from Kurenai's frown. "I didn't do anything," he grumbles.
Kurenai puffs at him, "You've goaded them into fighting." Dropping her voice, she murmurs, "That's not very Chūnin of you."
The boy twitches at her words. "What do you know?" he sulks.
Kurenai flattens her plump lips into a hard dash. "I bet the Sandaime would tell you the same," she remarks.
Kakashi-Sensei glares at her. "You aren't gonna tattle," he half-orders, half-pleads.
"If you behave like a Chūnin I won't," Kurenai threatens before she lets go of Kakashi-Sensei's neck and turns away from him.
Sakura wrings her hands together when she sees the dark look pass over her little teacher's face. He is not happy with Kurenai's answer. "I like you less than Kushina," he spits at the girl.
This declaration stirs up confusion among Sakura and her teammates. She looks at some of the others to see if anyone knows what that's supposed to mean but they are all either shaking their heads or knitting their brows together too.
Unsurprisingly Asuma and Gai understand what Kakashi-Sensei is saying, though. Asuma is even cringing at the remark. "Wow," he says. Bustling over, Asuma crowds the young kunoichi until she walks back a couple of steps and he plants himself in the vacated space. Now with Kurenai behind him, Asuma informs her, "Careful Kurenai. My brother says Minato is the only reason those two haven't killed each other yet."
Kurenai hums. Then, smiling around Asuma's head, tells Kakashi-Sensei, "We're fine, aren't we?"
Sakura covers her mouth when the boy bristles. "If I were you I'd watch my back," he warns.
Ino bumps shoulders with Sakura and murmurs in her ear, "How is he that scary!?"
She gives the other girl a dismayed shrug. Sakura wishes she knew. She'd like to be half that intimidating on just missions.
The girl is unbothered by his threat and reaches casually into one of the large cargo pockets of her Capri-length pants. "Are you hungry?" Kurenai asks Kakashi-Sensei as she waves around a bar of some kind wrapped in blue plastic. "I have a protein bar."
Asuma turns a bewildered stare on her. "What are you doing, Kurenai?" he says.
Kurenai ignores the boy in favor of keeping her gaze steady on Kakashi-Sensei. Sakura shifts her attention to the little boy too. Kakashi-sensei's (two!) gray, hooded eyes are fixated on the bar. There is a long silence followed by him forcefully turning his head away and swallowing. "…No," he says at last.
Kiba snorts from their group while Kurenai and Asuma blink dumbfounded at Kakashi-Sensei. Gai, it seems, knows what just to do as he snatches the bar from Kurenai's unresisting fingers and pushes it into Kakashi-Sensei's chest.
With a wide, winning smile Gai offers Kakashi-Sensei a thumbs up and promises, "It's okay, rival, we'll cover for you!"
Kurenai and Asuma are quick to lose their lost looks as they bunch up beside Gai and give assurances of their own.
"He's right," Kurenai tells Kakashi-Sensei.
Asuma nods along and says, "Yeah, we'll hide you."
Kakashi-sensei's loose grasp on the protein bar tightens and he looks down his masked nose at it in consideration.
"What?" whines Naruto. "That's not fair!"
Sakura readies to bop the blond on the head when Kurenai whirls around; her crimson eyes flashing. Naruto shrinks inward, quailing under her intense gaze. Her chin lifts at his reaction.
"Kakashi, go on," she says, nudging the little boy to slip between the narrow space between Gai and Asuma. He passes through without so much as a glance in their direction. Kurenai then gives a half-bow to a leery Asuma and curious Gai. "If you will excuse me for a second?" she asks. Her eyes flash once more as her attention fixes on them for a second time. "I want to talk to our… students."
"Sure," agrees Asuma as he bunches up closer to Gai.
The other boy mimics Asuma and Kakashi-Sensei disappears entirely from their view. "Do not be too harsh, Kurenai," he says with a laugh.
The girl giggles. "Oh, Gai, you know that's not me," she says.
Sakura looks over her shoulder at Team 8. There is trepidation painted on their faces as Kurenai all but bounces over to them. When she stops in front of their group the last of the cheeriness drops from her face and she crosses her arms.
They all shuffle around until Hinata, Kiba, and Shino head their cohort. She raises an eyebrow at them in response and says nothing. Kiba clears his throat and scrubs a hand through his hair. "What is it, Kurenai-Sen— Ah, Kurenai?" he stammers.
She narrows her eyes. "You're going to let Kakashi eat unbothered."
Naruto, always stupidly brave, argues with her. "C'mon, what's he hiding? Fat lips?" he demands.
She jolts at the question. "What?" she says only to shake her head. "Nevermind." Her previous ferocity returning to her face; she leans in close and seethes, "Kakashi is seven. Chūnin or not we've been in this room all morning and lunchtime was an hour ago."
"They didn't bring y-you anything to eat yet?" Hinata stutters out around her fingers.
Kurenai purses her lips. "No," she answers. "The shinobi in charge of our situation have been dealing with more important stuff I guess."
Baffled, Kiba practically shouts at her, "You guys should have asked for food!"
The girl stiffens at the chastisement. "We've been okay," she insists. Kurenai attempts to make herself bigger by stretching out her neck and putting her hands on her hips. "It wasn't an issue before now. Kakashi was sleeping until you all came here and started throwing around insults."
"Oh," murmurs Shino. "He's grumpy."
Kurenai's mouth curves in a wry smirk. "All the time," she says.
Sakura scrunches her nose as Kiba voices the confusion she (and probably most of the others) are feeling. "Huh?" he says.
The girl bites her lip; her chest shaking a little with suppressed giggles. "Right now he's hungry," she tells them after she's once more in control of herself. Her eyes skitter backward; they land on Asuma and Gai. At some point, they turned around altogether and Sakura can hear the two talking lowly to Kakashi-Sensei.
It must be to distract him, she thinks, because Kurenai is softening her voice again as she informs them, "It's making him short-tempered. If he doesn't eat he will kick your asses."
Ino huffs at this. "God," she mutters. "Somebody seriously promoted a baby to Chūnin?"
Kurenai presses a slender finger to her mouth and hisses, "Keep your voice down!" She looks one more time over her shoulder before she says, "Kakashi is talented and we're at war. When he's fed and rested he's a better shinobi than some who are twice his age."
Cowed, Ino is made to look at her feet and stammer, "O-Oh…"
Kurenai sniffs and cinches her arms over her middle. "So are you going to help us or be a bunch of jerks?" she demands.
Hinata makes the first move. She reaches out and places a kind hand on the younger girl's forearm. "We'll help, Kurenai-Sensei," she assures.
Her sternness evaporates and she leaps at Hinata to hug her. "Thank you!" she gushes into the blushing girl's cheek before she lets her go. Then, without so much as a glance at the rest of them, turns around and darts over to her fellow regressed Jōnin. "We're good now!" she exclaims as she links arms with Asuma and Gai. She smiles at the boys and says, "Let's huddle up."
They are all too happy to comply and the three form a triangle around tiny Kakashi-Sensei. Sakura can't see the top half of her teacher at all through the bulk of the older kids. She can make out his skinny legs and bruised knees between the gaps in their limbs, however.
She sighs and brings a hand to her forehead. "This is… gonna be a weird few days," she mumbles to no one in particular.
"For real," replies Ino with an emphatic nod.
How did y'all like this first chapter with everyone together?
Thanks for reading!