Ch 137: Teen Smartypants
This is a parody of the Spongebob episode: Patrick Smartpants. Credit goes to DaQueenRuler for the idea. This is one of those chapters with some major differences. Hope you enjoy it.
At the Loud house, the loud family is having pancakes for breakfast. Lisa is measuring the length of her pancakes.
Lisa: Ah, the right measurement.
Lincoln: Lisa, why are you measuring your pancakes?
Lisa: It's for science.
She prepared to eat her breakfast. Then Leni enters the dining room wearing shades. Though she was struggling to see where she was going.
Leni: Hey guys, check out my new shades. [she trips and falls face first on Lisa's pancakes]
Lisa: My pancakes! Leni!
Leni: Oops, my bad.
Cut to Lisa doing a science experiment in her room, using chemicals and beakers.
Lisa: This experiment has been going quite well. Surprising, there have been no disturbances.
Suddenly, Leni enters the room and slams the door open.
Leni: Hey Lisa!
One of Lisa's chemicals explodes due to the loud disruption, causing Lisa to get covered in soot.
Lisa: Leni! You disrupted my work! Did you not see the sign on the door that said "Do not Enter"?!
Leni: [realizing] Ohhh. I thought it said "donut enter". But "do not enter" totes makes more sense.
Lisa growls in frustration.
Now Lisa is building a dinosaur fossil in the backyard as a hobby. She worked on it pretty fast and the model was almost finished. And fortunately for her, none of her siblings interfered.
Lisa: I should get a no bell prize for this. I just have to add the finishing piece. [uses a ladder and climbs up to the fossil's mouth and attempts to put the finishing tooth piece in its mouth.]
Unfortunately, Leni showed up with some lemonade.
Leni: Hey Lisa, do you want some-[gasps and drops the lemonade when she sees the toddler in the mouth of the fossil, thinking the dinosaur fossil is trying to eat her] OMG! Lisa's being eaten by that bony dinosaur! I'll save you Lisa!
Lisa hears her and sees what she's doing.
Lisa: Leni! Don't touch that!
Leni grabs a fossil piece and removes it, causing the dinosaur fossil to collapse.
Lisa: Nooo! What have you done?!
Lisa falls to the ground as the fossil falls apart and Leni catches her. Some pieces fell on them but luckily, they were unharmed.
Lisa: My creation!
Leni: You created a living dinosaur? That's dangerous.
Lisa: [furious] Dangerous?! You're the only danger here! Now go away!
Leni: But Lisa, I-
Lisa: Now!
Leni goes back inside, looking sad. Luan comes out and sees Lisa frustrated.
Luan: Lis, what happened?
Lisa: Leni happened.
Leni: Like this morning, huh? Say, if Leni were both smart AND a fashionista, she'd be a smarty-pants! [laughs] Get it?
Lisa: [gets an idea as she smirks sinisterly] 'Smarty-pants,' eh? That could be the solution to Leni's intellectual disability…
Back in her room, the young genius got to work right away on her newest invention. This time she locked the door so Leni or anyone couldn't barge in. Soon, she was done making the invention. The invention was a pair of fancy white pants with some glittering rings near the bottom of the leg area, and it had a sci-fi belt to secure it in place.
Lisa: My newest invention is complete! The Smarty Pants 9000! When these pants are worn, It will increase Leni's IQ. Now I just need to get her to wear it.
Lisa leaves her room and heads over to her ditzy sister's room.
Lisa: Excuse me Leni, is it alright if I enter the premises?
Leni: Lisa, I know you're mad at me and-
Lisa: Forget it. It's all water under the bridge.
Leni: [confused] What bridge?
Lisa: Nevermind. Here. I got you these new pants at the mall.
Leni: [takes it] Ooh, they sure are fancy.
Lisa: Yes, they're fancy pants. They're all the rage now.
Leni: How did I not know about this?
Lisa: Put it on.
Leni does so.
Leni: Perfect fit.
Instantly, the signals are sent to Leni's brain and the pants get a spark or two.
Lisa: Leni? How are you feeling?
Leni: I'm feeling quite…bewildered. [looks down at her sandals] How long have I worn this ludicrous footwear?
Lisa: [surpised] Leni?
Leni: Also, this room could use some redecorating to match my astounding intellect.
Lisa: [trying to contain her excitement] Those are some big words Leni. I never heard you use them before.
Leni: Nonsense, my vocabulary is infinitely expanding.
Lisa: Well, let's expand our knowledge. Maybe we can do something fun together.
Leni: Oh, you want to run some statistics or observe phenomenon and render hypotheses of said phenomenon?
Lisa: [gasps] I thought you'd never ask!
Cut to the two brainiac sisters doing some scientific work together, and making groundbreaking inventions in record time. For example, they have built an anti gravity machine that allows you to float around in one room.
Lisa: I must say, Leni, these inventions are splendid.
Leni: Indeed.
Then Lincoln enters the room.
Lincoln: Hey, what are you two up to?
Leni: Lincoln, my dear brother. May I have a moment of time? I've always wanted to study your white hair.
Lincoln: Say what now?
Leni pulls out a microscope and takes a close look into his hair.
Leni: Hmm….nothing out of the ordinary here.
Lincoln: Ok, this is weird. Lisa, what have you done to the real Leni?
Lisa: This is the real Leni. So smart, so educated. Now we have more in common.
Leni: It's true.
Lincoln: Excuse me, I need a moment to process all this. [leaves the room]
Lisa: So elder sibling, shall we get back to our business?
Leni: Actually, I think it's better if we work solo. I need some space to perfect my own creations.
Lisa: Oh. Alright then. I bid you good luck Leni. [Leni leaves, Lisa is feeling quite proud of herself] Turning Leni into a genius was pure genius.
Soon, the blonde genius has made her own helpful creations and handed them out to her siblings. She's made a "Multiply-o-matic" machine that multiplied one item into more so the other siblings would stop fighting over stuff. She gave Lynn a "Morph ball" which is robotic and can turn into any sport ball and it doesn't deflate like Lynn's previous ones. She built "extendo-shoes" for Lily to help her get things out of her reach. And even Mr. and Mrs. Loud get an automatic massage chair with other soothing features when Lynn Sr. throws out his back. The family members were quite grateful.
Rita: [relaxing in massage chair] Leni, these inventions are wonderful.
Lynn Sr: [stretches] My back feels as good as new.
Lynn: [holding her ball] This is the coolest invention you've made so far.
Luna, Luan, and Lincoln used the Multiply-o-Matic to turn one $20 bill into three for each of them.
Luna: Dude, who knew you had a knack for inventing?
Lincoln: I guess there's two geniuses in the family now.
Lisa overhears this and shows up with her creations.
Lisa: [gets their attention] Ahem. Dear family, I have created some inventions too. [shows her first one] Behold! The nutcracker!
The Nutcracker was a robot that could crack nuts open, but the family looked unimpressed.
Lana: We've seen that before, Lisa.
Lisa: Ok, how about this? The Count-o-Matic! [it is a machine that can count items] Count-o-Matic, count how many pennies are in this bag.
Lisa held up a bag of pennies and the machine scanned it, and the number 99 appeared on its screen.
Count-o-Matic: 99 pennies.
The siblings rolled their eyes.
Luan: Boring.
Lisa: Wait! What about the laser slicer? It can-
Leni: Slice things evenly? Lisa, I'm afraid all your inventions have been observed.
Lisa: But-but-but-
Lola: Let's hear it for Leni and her new inventions!
The family cheers for Leni, who smiles proudly while Lisa looks away sadly. Later that day, Leni is reading and then hears piano playing.
Leni: That music. Where is it coming from?
She pops her head out of her room and hears the music coming from Luna's room. In Luna and Luan's room, the family musician is playing the piano instead of her usual guitar. Then she hears Leni enter the room.
Leni: I'd recognize that piece anywhere! Beethoven's Symphony No. 9
Luna: [very confused] Leni?
Leni: It's a beautiful piece. Execution needs some work. [walks over to the piano and gives Luna a suggestion on a specific bar that will improve her piano playing]
Luna: Wow! I never thought to do it like that.
Leni: Well, that is because you rarely think.
Luna: Well, how do you suddenly know so much about music?
Leni: A creative outlet provides a spiritual release and helps facilitate a healthy mental balance. [inhales] Ah.
Luna: I had no idea you were so knowledgeable, dude! I've been practicing the piano for my music class. Do you think you can be my musical mentor?
Leni: Very well. Let's take it from the top. [Luna plays, badly] Not so excellent, Luna. Let me demonstrate the proper technique. [Leni plays on key] Ok. Let's begin. And 1, 2, 3, 4... [Luna plays more. Leni covers her ears since Luna's playing is still terrible] Stop! Enough! [walks out] Find yourself a new mentor!
Lana: Hey Leni, I heard you playing music with Luna. Well what do you think of my music? [Lana plays a song with her armpit, Leni is not amused]
Leni: Lana, I find your humor vulgar. [walks away]
Lana: That's a good thing, right?
Leni goes back to her room to read a book, then gets a call from her older sister Lori. She answers it.
Lori: Hey Leni, I need some fashion advice. I have an upcoming date with Boo Boo Bear at a fancy restaurant.
Leni: Dear elder sibling, you need more than just fashion advice. Your clothes don't have any sophistication. You don't have proper etiquette. You act uncivilized and uncultured, not to mention your hair is not well groomed. With your flaws, your relationship with Bobby would likely last for a few months. Maybe even a year.
Lori: [shocked by what Leni had just said] Leni, what are you talking about?
Leni: [sighs] Look, I have some important reading to do to further my education. Just take my advice. Goodbye. [she hangs up, leaving Lori speechless]
Cut to Lincoln heading back to his room to read a comic, only to find out they have been replaced with super long/heavy college textbooks.
Lincoln: What the?! Where are my comics?! [looks around his room but can't find them] Alright, who took my comics?
Leni: I did. And I insist you start reading those books before you start college. You're welcome. [walks off]
Lincoln: [angry] You can't just do that! Those comics were my prized possessions! I practically had some of them since kindergarten!
Luan goes up to Leni.
Luan: Hey Leni, how about some jokes? [Leni sighs] What do you call a smart omelet?
Leni: An egghead?
Luan: Yes! An egghead! [laughs]
Leni: Luan, your daily jokes are old material and not humorous. Furthermore, you are an insult to the comedy world. [walks away]
Luan, rather insulted, immediately shuts up and literally zips her lips. Meanwhile in Lisa's room, the child prodigy has locked herself inside. Ever since Leni has become super smart, no one has come to seek knowledge from the toddler. She even stops inventing and quits reading her big textbooks. All she is doing now is knitting with Leni's old sewing machine from the former ditz but Leni threw it out, stating she doesn't require it anymore.
Lisa: (sighs) I think I need some professional help. [gets out her phone and calls her fellow science colleagues] Hello, Mrs. Sandra? I need some professional help.
Laughing is heard.
Lisa: [confused] Hello?
Mrs. Sandra: Oh, sorry Lisa. I was just having a conversation with your brilliant sister, Leni Loud. We considered replacing you and having her here for seminars.
Lisa: [surprised] L-Leni?
Mrs. Sandra: Leni, the new you gets an A plus.
Leni: Why, thank you, Mrs. Sandra. I find your intellect rather stimulating as well.
Mrs. Sandra: Oh, really? Well, thanks.
Lisa starts to tear up and hangs up on the call, the college professor forgetting she was talking on the phone. Cut to Leni with the science colleagues and her friends, Fiona and Miguel. They are at some college university.
Miguel: I can't believe Leni got this smart.
Fiona: I know. And those new pants are so fashionable.
Leni is at a chalkboard where there's an equation on it.
Mrs. Sandra: Well, Leni, what do you think about this problem?
Leni: [changes formula] You simply change the literal term to a coefficient and the minuend will achieve the desired quotient. Even the simplest of people can figure it out with a little thought.
Mrs. Sandra: [angrily puts her hands on her hips] What do you mean by that, Leni?
Leni: I'm merely suggesting you lack the ability to solve remedial equations.
Mrs. Sandra: Are you suggesting I'm dumb?
Leni: I'd use a more sophisticated word like 'impaired'.
Mrs. Sandra: I think you'd better leave.
Leni: I was only trying to help. [walks off]
Mrs. Sandra: I don't need your kind of help, Miss know-it-all!
Fiona and Miguel follow Leni out of the building.
Fiona: Geez Leni, don't you think that was a bit much?
Miguel: Yeah.
Leni: That's how it is in the genius society. Of course, I wouldn't expect you simple minds to understand.
Fiona and Miguel look offended.
Miguel: I don't like your new attitude Leni.
Leni: My dear friends. It's no use. We've just grown apart.
Fiona: What? What do you mean?
Leni: I know we've had fun in the past, but we're just not compatible anymore. It's time we went our separate ways...such is life.
Miguel: But Leni, you're our friend!
Leni: I know it's hard, but brace up, former friends. Maybe our paths will cross again someday. Think fondly of me, dear acquaintances. [she leaves her friends]
Miguel: Goodbye…best fashionista friend! [sobs]
Fiona: I liked her better when she was a dumb blonde.
Back at the Loud house, it is now evening. The family members, except Leni and Lisa, are gathered in the living room.
Lincoln: Guys, I can't deal with this new Leni.
Lana: Tell me about it. I asked her to fix my tattered overalls and she turned it into a fancy business suit. [shows the mini business suit]
Lucy: I read my new poem to her and she said it was nonsensical.
Luna: Luan has said a single word ever since Leni judged her comedy.
The comedian is now dressed as a sad mime.
Lynn Sr: Even Lily was bored rather than sleepy when Leni read her some textbook narrations instead of her awesome bedtime stories.
Lincoln: Well I say the family only needs one genius, and that's Lisa. And speaking of which, I wonder what she's up to?
Lisa is lying in her bed, still depressed.
Lisa: I never thought I'd lose my title as the family genius. How can I compete with a bigger genius? Ohhhhhh!
Cut to Leni in her room, sitting on her bed. She is now feeling more concerned than proud about her actions and feelings towards others.
Leni: Surrounded by knowledge and no one to share it with. No one I can call friend. I even lost the attention of my family. [notices a book on the drawer next to her called 'LENI'S FAM ALBUM'] My family album.
Lisa: [looks at her own album book called "LISA'S FAMILY UNIT ALBUM'] Well, at least the old Leni is in my memories.
[Lisa looks at several pictures of her and Leni together, as Lisa begins to cry and another picture is shown, it's revealed that Leni is the one who put a tear on the last picture]
Leni: Aww, the glory days. Why have we grown apart? [sobs] I must apply all that I know to solve this problem!
A montage is shown of the teen trying to solve her problem. She looks at x-rays of her and Lisa's head, meditates in the living room, studies Lynn, and reads a book. She puts the book down and shows her bloodshot eyes.
Leni: What could it be? [applies a chemical on her hair and it grows longer] What's different? Ah! [tears some of her hair] What?! I'd do anything to have my genius sister back by my side again!
Cut to Leni knocking on Lisa's door.
Lisa: [depressed] Who is it?
Leni: It's me, Lisa. Your second eldest sibling.
Lisa: [opens the door] What do you want?
Leni: I want to have fun with you again. Like the old days.
Lisa: Really?
Leni: Yes. It may restore me back to my old, happy go lucky self. Please, show me all the fun stuff I did in the past.
Lisa: [excited] Certainly.
The two begin to partake in fun activities that Leni would enjoy, like having a fashion show and roller skating, but the nerdy teen is critical and skeptical about the activities. Now they are on a Dairyland ride.
Leni: Are you quite sure I found this activity to be fun?
Lisa: Yeah! [screams with enjoyment and Leni screams in fear as they ride through the roller coaster, then it comes to an end] That was fun, huh Leni?
Leni: [turns green and vomits on the ground]
Lisa: Oh dear. I guess we'll never have fun again.
Leni: When did the fun go away, Lisa?
Lisa: It went away when I gave you those Smarty-pants. [realizes] That's it! You must remove those pants!
Leni: Yes! The solution was so obvious I was too brilliant to see it.
Lisa: Wait Leni, are you sure you want to give up being smart and sophisticated?
Leni: Knowledge can never replace friendship and family love. I prefer to be an idiot.
Lisa: You're more than just a mere idiot. You're family and special in your unique way.
Leni: Alright, let's do this! [tears off pants, but is still wearing her old dress]
Lisa takes the pants and throws it into a river where it sinks and short circuit, destroying it entirely.
Lisa: Leni, say something Leni.
Leni: I totes feel great.
Lisa: Leni, you're back.
Leni: Leni, you're back.
Lisa hugs her.
Lisa: I'm sorry Leni, It was wrong of me to change you, Can you ever forgive me?
Leni: Of course Lisa. And I promise to be more cautious and less airheaded from now on.
Lisa: Splendid. Now let's go home.
Leni: Hop on, sis.
Lisa hops on her old ditzy sister's back and they happily head back home.