DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe.

Thinking (+ flashbacks, Mito speaking to the Kyuubi in her mindscape, etc.)

Emphasis

Bijuu, etc. speaking

Bijuu, etc. thinking

"'Mitarashi?'" Mito scoffed. "Seriously?"

Anko crossed her arms over her chest, deciding that there was no choice but to kick her best friend's ass as she continued leaning against the wall within her small room. "I am serious. ...Bitch."

Mito started chuckling: damn her; she should be terrified right now.

"You should understand, you ramen-sucking pig! Kami gave humans dango and who am I to deny Him? As His humble but most fervent follower... Nay! His apostle! SHUT UP MITO! I'M ON A ROLL HERE," Anko shouted, then cleared her throat importantly, fist over her mouth, getting back to business but appreciating that she'd finally made her weird-haired friend laugh. She hated seeing Mito so down.

"Mitarashi Anko is my name and kicking ass is my game!" Mito slow clapped but did seem to finally get it. "So? You like it?!"

"Yeah," Mito decided, almost in disbelief of her own words, "it suits you, actually." Anko had mentioned "getting" a badass last name in a couple of her letters. Orochimaru had one that he'd never disclosed to her, (he liked being a first-name-only threat to the continent, gods love him,) but apparently, he denied Anko's request to take whatever that was as her own.

"Orochimaru Anko:" that's what her friend had suggested alternatively, (hopefully as a joke,) so "Mitarashi Anko" was really MUCH much better.

"Maybe I should go out into the world as Ramen Mito. – No: that sounds like shit. Gods, I miss ramen."

Anko inhaled slowly and deeply then blew it out in a raspberry as she slowly slunk down to the floor. "When will that be again?"

Mito barked out a laugh but there was no humor in it. She shrugged her shoulders to indicate that she didn't know when her exile would end and laid down, almost flat on the floor. "Oh, Ramen-sama: how I miss you," she wailed instead. "Why'd ya have to bring up ramen, Anko?"

Anko smirked flirtatiously and pulled out a seal. "Got somethin' for ya."

"If it's snake-related," Mito began but stopped herself as she quickly sat up. Really, it WAS her birthday and she'd appreciate anything her friend brought her - except for maybe that snake that she unsealed from a letter that ate her before spitting her out and dispelling. Or the time - after not seeing me for more than a year - Anko pretended to be pregnant and used a genjutsu to "give birth" to snakes. If she hadn't done it so quickly right after showing up, Mito would've caught on no matter how bad her genjutsu skills now were! Damn that Anko!

How can I happily sit with her when I really should be kicking her ass for all of that?

Grimacing with wariness as she pressed chakra into the seal, she cried out, gingerly clutching the large bag that had been inside it. "I swear to Kami, Anko: if this isn't what it says it is," but Mito could already smell it! Salivating, she reached inside the bag and pulled out the first bowl of still-steaming ramen. Reluctantly, she passed a bowl to Anko before grabbing the other two for herself, too.

She hadn't received ramen via toad in MONTHS!

Inhaling the first bowl like an animal, she sat back, uncaring that the broth was still running down her chin. Politeness was of no consequence: Anko sure as hell didn't care and now she had something to hopefully lick off and savor later. "I love you, Mitarashi Anko!"

She nearly swallowed the second and third bowl whole, but revered every single bite of the last two, giving herself time to relish in the flavors and comfort that only Ichiraku Ramen provided. "How did you get it, though?"

"Hokage-sama sent for Orochimaru-shishou and he took me along with him," Anko answered, raising an eyebrow suggestively. "Just before we headed here, actually."

"Reeeealy?" Mito asked between luscious bites. "So is Dad letting you two go back?" Orochimaru's exile from Konoha was really stupid and overkill, Mito thought.

So was hers, in her humble opinion.

"He doesn't want to go back," Anko bit back. "Konoha discarded us."

"Tsk. Don't be stupid," Mito replied. "'Konoha' didn't want you to leave at all if you recall. Dad fought Orochimaru-oji to keep you in the village, but your undying love for my awesome uncle finally convinced him." Anko already had her head turned, nose up in the air, though, so this looked like it would be something else her friend refused to budge on. "Anyway, I'll stab you guys if you turn traitor against Konoha."

Mito had said it with humor, but for an instant, she could imagine them doing it and felt her stomach turn. Anko didn't look bothered - in fact, she looked like she was up to something so Mito quickly forgot about it and started eating again. "So. You seeing anybody?"

Anko pulled a face and huffed. "Guren-chan's still in denial."

"That's what you said about me."

"Well so are you," Anko said cheekily before deciding to crawl forward slowly, swinging her hips seductively as she did. She was completely disgusted when Mito put her foot on her bountiful chest to keep her away. How disrespectful! "You're the fucking worst."

How was it that she knew a total of three girls and none of them were interested?

Yet!

"Here's to being the fucking worst then," Mito said, raising her soda. Orochimaru's gift this year had been a case of sodas, and Mito had been greedily sucking them down for the past few hours. Both girls' heads swiveled to the door long before someone actually knocked: there was definitely a shinobi coming their way; a real one, in Mito's opinion. "I guess it's time for you to go," the teen said in just over a whisper, but what she sensed didn't feel normal and the incoming presence confused her.

"That's not Orochimaru-shishou," Anko said in a low voice, frowning toward the door, waiting to know who was approaching since her friend seemed worried.

Mito was the one that identified the (now hunted) Uchiha prick who had attacked Konoha. If Anko trusted anyone's senses as much or more than she did her master's, it was Mito-chan. Something was wrong if Mito didn't know who it was and she looked like she thought someone was playing with her.

"Whoever it is is hiding their chakra, but," Mito began, silencing herself when she smelled a faint hint of... cigarettes. And monkeys. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, as fear - and that night - and... Her grandfather was dead on the ground next to her: his father!

Or was it his big brother? She hadn't been around Hideki nearly as much as she had Asuma: they grew up together. But either way! "Oh, Kami," Mito whimpered. Anko was immediately on her, hoisting her up.

"What is it?"

"Asuma-nii, I think. He used to always hide from me like this, sent out weird signals plus clones and stuff when we were kids," she said, biting her lip. "Ojii- Sandaime-sama, I mean, taught him how to confuse my senses."

"Well then it is time for me to go, I guess," Anko said, stepping back before changing her mind and embracing her best friend in a tight hug. She wanted to stay longer but knew those two had a lot to discuss. "Keep up the fight, eh? Don't let the bastards get you down," she added seriously.

"Right. You, too, then," Mito absently replied. Later she regretted that she hadn't even said those words while looking at her best friend. She'd been too freaked out by Asuma showing up.

Anko shut the door behind her, gritting her teeth when she saw her friend already shakily kneeling to probably beg for forgiveness.

Her master had told her the S-class secret, of the horror of that night when they moved to Grass, swearing (and sealing) her to secrecy. She knew that Mito didn't realize that Sandaime-sama would die and she believed them both to be heroes, having fought the Kyuubi. Anko had been "protecting" civilians that night, i.e. just standing there with them, deep inside the Hokage Monument.

Mito didn't know that she knew about her burden, she thought, but maybe her best friend figured it out, considering the way she didn't react to her understanding her feelings of fear about her big brother figure. Or maybe Asuma showing up had made Mito think of little else. That idea kind of pissed her off.

Over the years, Mito had talked about missing him, always with terrible guilt that Anko couldn't address up-front for what it was: bullshit.

"What up?" Anko asked the approaching boy. He's a man now, I guess. Asuma was now kinda cute, actually: big and burly. He should shave, though: his beard sucked in her humble opinion.

The not-much-older guy blew out a stream of tobacco smoke, careful not to direct it in her face - something that Anko appreciated.

"Anko-san, I presume," Asuma said, remembering the younger girl from the Academy. She had seemingly disappeared, but that was probably with Orochimaru following the attack, whom he knew had taken her on as his apprentice years ago. Early rumors were that Orochimaru unleashed the Kyuubi and ran, but the announcement of an S-class manhunt for Uchiha Obito had quickly ended that BS. Although Anko was all curvy and "grown-up" now, her round face was almost exactly the same as when she was a little kid.

Kami. What was Mito going to look like? It had been a long time...

"Are you a birthday present?" Anko asked.

Asuma wasn't sure if she was being suggestive, but it sure sounded like it. He felt his face heating up but denied it happening in his head. "I've got one for her," he said before narrowing his eyes at her. "Didn't know you two were friends."

Asuma seemed to be threatening her, so that was good news for Anko because it was good news (she hoped) for Mito. She stepped forward as if to pass him but bumped her shoulder into his arm fiercely at the last second. "Best friends. For YEARS. Get that straight, asshole."

Asuma hummed, a little puzzled over the whole encounter. Oh well, he could ask Mito, right? "Got it. Good to see you."

Anko hissed at him but continued on her way. - Wherever it was she was going.

Is she the Chunin kunoichi Hokage-sama had mentioned?! He'd guessed that it was Mito after learning of her whereabouts, but maybe he'd been wrong. Asuma pulled out the two boxes that he'd had sealed in his weapons pouch and knocked on the door, regretting that he hadn't been able to contact his little sister long before this.

He hadn't known where she was, though!

"Come in," said an oddly quiet voice he hadn't heard in years; well, it was a little deeper...

Asuma opened the door and found a young woman kneeling before him, her dual-toned blonde and red hair was much longer and in a large puddle on the floor... Just seeing that ridiculous - not her fault - hair again made him chuckle, and she looked up with an expression he would've laughed at more, had he also not seen a little cleavage because of the position she was in. "Ngh- Put on some more clothes, Mito-chan. Or get a blanket or somethin'."

"The fuck you on about?" Mito questioned honestly before squawking and dropping her head again, so fast that she bonked it on the floor, as she continued to apologize for causing his father's death.

Asuma took a deep breath but groaned while the ridiculous girl went on and on, her voice varying between near shouts and a weird sort of chant - either because she was crazy or thanks to having lived with the monks for so long - so he grabbed her arm and pulled her up. He'd had long enough to properly grieve for his father, and knew that Mito wasn't ultimately responsible for what he'd done. Smiling grimly, he told her the truth. "It's alright, Mito-chan. Pops told me everything," he said while swallowing the lump that still managed to occasionally come up in his throat when he mentioned the man he had struggled to earn the approval of - an approval he apparently always had, or so his father's goodbye letter to him said.

He patted her head - Mito had gone and gotten tall on him: the little brat. "You look good, kiddo." He watched as her lips began to tremble, waiting for her to stomp her foot as she refused to cry, but instead she leaped on him and balled. Asuma was so shocked that he didn't know what to do other than pat her back.

Yes, he had seen Mito cry before, but this was almost as bad as when she had cholic as a baby - which had been a nearly never-ending nightmare. "Enough, Mito. Have you seriously turned into a crybaby since OOOF!"

"Aniki! Don't make me stab you," she not-threatened through tears, although she'd already punched him. She did hold back and grumbled as she worked at gently, carefully healing him (those skills of hers still sucked) while he mumbled curses at her. "What are you doing here?!"

"Mission," he grunted before slowly standing up fully, rubbing his belly and milking it so she'd hopefully feel bad. Who was he kidding? Mito was a Punch-Now Think-Later girl. Letting out a loud sigh, he waited for her to stop bitching about him smelling like cigarettes, their EXACT health implications, rude comments about his beard, her thoughts on the monks - one of whom was "a freak:" something he'd have to check out - before she finally seemed to take a real breath. "You haven't changed at all, you know that?"

"You're even taller," Mito said, pouting as if that wasn't obvious.

She was immediately behind him - nearly as quick as her father's flash - her back pressed against his own. He chuckled when he felt the edge of her hand softly brush him at the base of his head. She was measuring herself against him again. "What did I tell you? You'll never outgrow me, Mito."

Mito faced him fully then, and Asuma noticed that she not only looked like a grown woman now - which she was NOT, by the way - but she had dark circles under her eyes. "Who's bothering you?" he asked seriously.

"Tch! Don't be absurd," she said a little too defensively, realizing and regretting it. She uncrossed her arms and plastered a smile on her face. "If you'd been here ten minutes ago, you coulda had the ramen Anko-chan brought for me." Asuma looked at her as if he didn't believe that for a second, as if he knew she wouldn't part with a bowl. And Mito had given one up one bowl - not that she'd do the same with a second... Anko and Asuma coulda shared! "Hypothetically. Are you hungry?"

"A little. In fact, I brought something with me," he said and unsealed her birthday cake. "Happy birthday, Mito-chan." It was a two-layer carrot cake, no raisins: her favorite. Asuma scratched his head awkwardly, thinking of how it came to be. It was made from - as they say - love but his argument with his brother had been INTENSE. "Hideki and I made it for you."

Hideki's girlfriend may have saved the cake from burning, but still…

Mito looked up at him, her dual-toned eyes were dark and stormy. "He doesn't hate me?" she asked in a small voice.

"No. He's an asshole, but he's not THAT much of an asshole, right?"

"Yeah," Mito said and harshly wiped away the incoming tears again. She was no crybaby. "Let's eat it!"

"How's Dad? And the village? And most of all, Naruto-chan?"

"Good," he said unhelpfully. The last time he'd seen Mito's bratty little brother, he was giving the Hokage a run for his money as he ran around his office. A happy and sheltered little boy aside from some rumors his older sister didn't need to know about right now, Naruto had surprised him when he attacked him with a hug after reporting from a long mission. Genma had held up his hands in surrender - he'd apparently been on babysitting duty at that moment - saying "not it" before sunshinning away, leaving him in charge of the kid for a few hours.

Naruto was even madder with energy than Mito had been. Asuma supposed that he could tell her that.

The thing he didn't want to tell her is that he had mentioned her, and Naruto had broken out into big ugly tears, saying he wanted his nee-chan. Yondaime-sama had looked so miserable that he'd found it hard to remain in the room. He took the kid out for ice cream, and Naruto forgot all about it, thankfully.

"He's super energetic. Your father's working hard to let him have a real childhood."

"Ah," Mito said, looking down and fiddling with her hands before beginning to eat another piece of cake.

Asuma sighed as he watched her. Kami, Mito was such a pig.

Mito and he were born during his father's reign and in wartime. Neither of them had had any choice but to be ninjas, considering who their parents were. His family often sheltered the Uzumaki heiress, the Yellow Flash's only child at the time, and he'd watched her as without being forced to, Mito was already training aggressively by the time she was Naruto's age. Naruto wasn't yet in the Academy, nor were his age-mates. Oh, Asuma supposed he would do well once he got there if the kid could just FOCUS, but it almost seemed odd that kids were now starting their baby ninja training at the age (or close to it) that he and Mito were already in the forces.

Odd but good.

"He's got a group of little friends," he said as he tried to light up a smoke. Mito batted it away from him and he acquiesced: they were in her room, after all. "It looks like all the heirs will be starting the Academy at the same time, so they have play dates or sometimes run wild," Asuma said before letting out a chuckle. "One time, Kakashi-kun was in charge of them, and gods did he lose his shit when Naruto and Sasuke-chan managed to get away from him."

Mito's looked down and up again, giving him a watery smile. THIS was the kind of thing she'd been wanting to hear about, even more (or at least as much as) the "reports" on Naruto's health and growth, etc., that she'd been getting from her father. Oh, her Dad said more about little Naruto sometimes, but it was never enough. "I remember holding Sasuke-chan. How is Itachi-chan?"

"An impressive Chunin. Nice kid: quiet and serious most of the time. Hangs mostly with his clansmen. You know how the Uchihas are."

Mito's expression soured, and she ignored the Kyuubi's growl. Why was the fox listening to her conversation? And he had to be! He always freaked out at the mention of They Who Shall Not Be Named. "Chunin?! I'm a fucking Chunin! He's a little kid!"

"Not anymore. And you'll get promoted. Maybe this mission will be the one to do it for you," he said, knowing it probably wasn't true. She was the Hokage's daughter, though, and she was majorly skilled unless things had changed.

"What mission?"

"What do you mean 'what mission?' Aren't you going to be working at the Temple?"

"I don't think so, at least not technically..." A toad appeared and Mito shook her head, half-convinced that her father (or Jiraiya, more likely) was bugging her room. "I haven't had a mission since I left." She retrieved a seal on paper from the toad. "Thanks, Gamatama. Is this from the Ero-ojii or Dad?"

"Both," the toad said while waiting for her to unseal the contents. He was eyeing her remaining cake hungrily, so after making sure Asuma didn't want any more, she gave it to him. He ate it all in one bite before poofing away.

Mito shook her head. "They never want to wait for me to write back." Pressing chakra into the seal, confetti flew into the air as pops and smoke filled the entire room. "Crazy pervert!" Sadly, her father never had time for such antics. Mito thought things like this might remind him a little too much of her mother. And wasn't that awful?

A variety of scrolls - and tiny pieces of paper that she'd have to sweep up - were now strewn out in front of them, but the one that caught her eye and made her breath hitch was a mission scroll. She grabbed Asuma's hand, not realizing just how tightly she was holding it until it cracked. "Sorry!" He waved off her apology and moved to lay down on her futon as he watched, rubbing his sore hand and wrist as he did so. Mito eagerly read her mission and closed her eyes before letting out a squeal. "I AM your kunoichi counterpart," she said excitedly before thrusting the scroll at him. "This is going to be awesome! Well, not dressing up to be a lady and shit, plus it's part-time, but I'm actually gonna get paid, 'ttebane!"

Oops: there it is again. Fortunately, Asuma didn't say anything about that very occasional tick of hers. Memories of her mother letting loose that same non-word flooded her mind, but Mito was pretty adept at shutting them off now.

Yeah... Right.

Asuma read the mission and set it aflame with a sealless spark jutsu that he'd picked up from his old man. "I guess we need to plan."

"I'm opening my presents first!"

Asuma scoffed but smiled at her excitement. "The ladies at court are going to have a helluva time with you, imouto." Mito's eyebrow quirked up in a way that told Asuma she was going to be especially hard to handle.

"You bet your ass they will, but I'll do my part: you'll see!"

"Whatever you say," he said, closing his eyes. Asuma fell asleep as Mito opened more presents from her family: mainly scrolls and books. His last sleepy thought was wondering if she really was collecting Jiraiya-sama's perverted book series. What a brat.

If she thought they were good, though, maybe he'd have to read them after all.

/

"Daimyo-sama, Madame Shijimi, may I present Sarutobi Asuma-sama and Namikaze Mito-hime."

Mito and Asuma were bowing as low as their "stations" allowed and waiting to be addressed and allowed to rise. Mito was also almost immobilized thanks to the layers and layers of fine silks she was wearing.

She kinda wanted to stab Tsunade for sending the terrible (but beautiful) much-too-formal wear. ...And thank God Asuma had been there to tie that obi.

Even using her clones, together, they couldn't remember how to tie it properly. They did do a great job with her hair, but the Uzushio style her mother had taught her to wear as a partial updo was so different from what the other girls and ladies here were wearing. She wondered how long it would be before these women tried to get her to change it.

After several moments in which the Daimyo spent humming, he finally made a sound of approval and then clapped his hands twice.

"Good! Very good! I wasn't aware that the Hokage would send me the heads of two prestigious clans when I sent my request. Excellent," he clapped again. "Rise, Mito-hime, Asuma-dono."

Asuma took Mito's dainty hand (yeah, right,) to help her rise to her feet, trying not to wince as she supposedly gingerly took his fingers. It's not like he could forget what a taijutsu monster she was, but this was an act that she had promised to go along with willingly! Hideki was also technically the head of his clan now, but few knew of Hideki's existence, thanks to his decades in ANBU.

Asuma knew that he was to go along with what the Daimyo believed, anyway. No sweat, he hoped.

"It's an honor to be in your presence."

Asuma saw the devil cat's earlier approach; when she rubbed herself on Mito's leg, he sent a silent prayer to Kami-sama that his little sister wouldn't stomp Tora into atomic particles. Mito made a little growling sound but covered it up by pretending to giggle and cough, then asked if she could pet the demon from hell known as Tora.

"You like my Tora-chan," the Daimyo's wife exclaimed breathlessly. "Of course, you may pet it, my dear," she laughed. "Ah, you're as lovely and pretty as your father!"

Asuma swallowed down a snort. Thinking of Yondaime-sama as "lovely and pretty" was kind of hilarious. – It was also kinda true, though: now that he considered it more.

Not that he'd ever say that out loud.

"Who's a good girl, Tora-chan?" Mito purred, trying not to grit her teeth, knowing exactly who this "cat" - she has to be an (unhappy) ninneko to have lived so damn long - was. "You're a good girl; yes you are!" For a moment Mito thought the cat would bite her, and for Kami-only-understood what reason, it amused her to no end. Tora stared at her intelligently for a few seconds before rolling on her back and wiggling to receive more gentle pets.

Madame Shijimi then half-lost her mind, shrieking "kawaii" while her husband applauded. Mito glanced up at Asuma and wondered just what degree of flakiness they'd see in these people. Moments later, Shijimi grabbed her cat and absolutely attacked it with love.

Mito felt terrible for the cat but kept her expression neutral. "You have a lovely cat, m'lady."

"So polite, so polite! Come with me, darling," the woman exclaimed, tugging Mito forward. Mito bowed again to the Daimyo as she was forced away, trying to remain as courteous as she knew how to be even as she was yanked forward. "Look at you! In time, you really will make a wonderful Miko: I'm sure of it!"

Mito swallowed thickly but smiled gently, trying to truly appreciate the woman's harsh but seemingly genuine belief in her. She wasn't allowed to leave to tend the Uzumaki's shrine and didn't believe that anyone else was capable of doing what her mother had taught her, and being forced to learn to be an attendant in another temple?

This was part of her mission, however, but she felt a bit like a traitor to her roots within the role she was playing.

She respected the Will of Fire and believed in it. Uzu had other customs and beliefs, though: most of them more… "stringent." Hers was a clan from a different country, one that survived not only wars for generations, but had thrived even against the sea, finally becoming one with it and its sandy shores.

Asuma watched with concern as Mito followed Madame Shijimi's directions, glad that his duties should be strictly guarding the Daimyo, as far as he understood them thus far.

The Daimyo was scrutinizing the two shinobi from behind the large fan he held in front of his face. He had met the Hokage's daughter on two previous occasions and thought it humorous that she skulked away from him and his wife these last few years when she was living so close to them. It would have been easy for them to have taken her in, to groom her as they would their own had they been fortunate enough to have children: her life would be much easier than it was now. She was a strong girl and a kunoichi so it was time for her to learn her place.

He also wanted to get that old goat, Chukaku, off his back: the man seemed to never tire of complaining about the kunoichi.

Namikaze Mito was in for quite a few surprises, as was Sarutobi Asuma, whom he had also met on three occasions when he was a child.

When the young Sarutobi turned his full attention to him again, he repeatedly batted his eyelashes at him. He and his wife enjoyed messing with the staff to no end. And the ninneko that had sworn her life to his family generations ago was such a wonderful foil for his guard and the shinobi of Konoha.

"Your father was a great man, Asuma-san," he said firmly as he fully retracted his fan, smacking it on his palm twice as he considered his words. "It is time for a generational change in the Guardian 12. Learn well," he said more intensely as he moved forward in his seat. "Hokage-sama has agreed for you to share techniques that are non-clan related with my men," he said with a wink, "and in return, they shall share the same with you. Understand that there will be those who oppose this: all of this. I look forward to seeing how you progress in any case," he said while looking into the corner. "Your training begins today. Chiriku-san!"

"My Lord," Chiriku said, appearing out of the shadows in that corner.

"Introduce Asuma-san to the others," he said with a knowing look. "You know what to do," he said, fanning himself once again before hiding behind it. "May the Will of Fire favor and protect you."