DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe.

Thinking (+ flashbacks, "Mito speaking to Kurama in her mindscape," etc.)

Emphasis

Bijuu, etc. speaking

Bijuu, etc. thinking

Mito bowed respectfully to the Mizukage, her friend, Lady Mei. "Thank you again for having me, Mizukage-sama. I have come today with corrected intelligence as well as a… gift."

"Why should we believe you this time?" Utakata asked, even though he knew he sounded bored. He thought that the last batch of crap came too easily - as did Mei - but at least Kiri had learned that Minato-sama most likely had a faction against him within the military of Konoha. Mito hadn't been upfront about it and considering that alone, it was telling. Considering that she rarely gives a fuck about anything but her brothers.

Don't get Mito started talking about her brothers. Utakata had learned that lesson well.

Mito blew him off. "I have proper invoices this time, shipping routes that I have to tell you right now: I couldn't verify; plus names and some… nasty intelligence about what may have happened to our people." Not all of them, but too many to let stand.

One is too many.

Mei tried not to audibly groan. "Well, let's see it." Mito handed the first scroll to her and, after asking for permission, used her chakra to open up a complex seal.

"I've got it in a digital format, too, which is enclosed in the second storage compartment."

"Human trafficking, hm?" Mei asked as she read the top page of the report's synopsis. "It's what we assumed - although I'd hoped that they wouldn't have been moved out of the continent. –This makes everything much more difficult."

"What's in the second scroll?" Zabuza asked.

"I'd like to give this to Lady Mei alone if she'll allow it," Mito admitted. Someone was getting into Kiri's most secure vaults and although she thought Zabuza was loyal to Mei, one never really knew.

Zabuza glared at her even harder. "Why the fuck should we let you get close to her alone?! You're the goddamn ambassador and you supposedly gave us shit intel last time…"

"Which implicated MY village, asshole," Mito drawled, annoyed.

"Alright you two," Mei scolded them, having already had enough. The more she read, the worse this looked. "It's fine, Mito: it's just us," she sighed, getting up to go around the desk to stand next to her friend to retrieve the other scroll. "Sad as it is: Ao, Utakata, and Zabuza have my absolute faith."

"Well, that's hurtful: saying it's sad," Utakata lied, a little whinily.

Mito gave Mei a long look, hoping this wouldn't bite her in the ass. "If you say so." After nicking her thumb and pushing her blood and chakra into the seal, it opened, revealing the longsword, Nuibari.

"Mother Fucker!" Zabuza yelled.

Ao hollered at the same time. "Where did you get this?"

"The sewing needle," Mei whispered of the sword, somewhat wondering the same thing.

"I think it fell off an Akatsuki guy. I'm calling him Akatsuki Ace."

"You think?!" Ao yelled.

"Well, it probably fell off him while some trees were kicking his ass," Mito failed to explain - although it's more like the seals were kicking his ass. Mito still didn't quite understand how that worked; she was just glad it did. "Anyway, I saw something in the grass after our non-battle, and there it was: just lying there."

Mei was definitely going to melt someone this time. How did the other swords make it back to Kiri when this one did not? "One of Kiri's Great Seven Swords was 'just lying there,'" she deadpanned.

Mito winced but it was true. "Sorry."

"How do we know that Konoha did not steal this?" Ao asked. He could feel Mei's irritated eyes on him but didn't flinch.

Mito groaned. She did not want to show that video but could tell that the old man was all fired up again. And on the crotchety ol' big mouth went…

"Who is to say that you have not now finally returned Nuibari to us, hoping to gain favor for your Hokage and position?! –Hoping to feed us more…" Ao sputtered a couple of times, only getting angrier when he saw that the young people in the office seemed to think his outrage was funny. "More bad intelligence!"

Mito gave him a dry look. "Right. Because it's so obvious that I want Kiri and my home village of Konoha to fight when not fighting is my JOB." Zabuza, at least, couldn't hide his snort about that. "So this sword has been missing for a while, then?"

"What?!"

Mito sighed. "You just claimed that Konoha had 'FINALLY' returned Nuibari?"

Utakata caught that, too. "You should be careful with how freely you hand out vital Kiri intelligence, Ao." A smirk grew on his face at the way his leader was whispering curses as she tried to calm herself. Mei was pinching the bridge of her nose and that usually meant an outburst was coming - sometimes involving lava or acidic mist. Utakata wasn't stupid; he slowly stepped back a pace or two.

Ao was mortified. "Why in my day, young people knew their place."

"'Knew their place?'" Now Mito was getting aggravated. "Like the way the shinobis of your generation treated women? Even kunoichis - as if we're only something to breed? I oughta kill you."

"You can't kill him, Mito," Mei hissed, baring her teeth. "Everyone knows that I reserve that right."

"Fair enough," Mito agreed. Ao stormed out, making everyone happy. "I've been thinking about it and I'm sure that you want to keep those vaults locked up tight. I think we could discuss methods to enhance their security - without me ever seeing them."

"Just a theoretical discussion?" Mei asked. Sealing knowledge was difficult to come by and she would certainly value what she could get. Mei wasn't bad with seals but she was no seals mistress.

"Sure. –Can I ask how long the sword has been missing?" Mito asked. "And um… Are there any others that I should be on the lookout for?" She felt stupid even asking but then again - finding another one would suck, embarrassing Mei like that.

"Zabuza, go check the vaults," Mei sighed, thinking that for the best. "Nuibari has been missing since the war. Actually, Mito, the last place it was seen was around Konoha."

Mito internally cursed Shikaku for not sharing that intelligence - but then again, he probably didn't know. "I really didn't know that."

Mei assumed as much, otherwise, Konoha would have most likely been more careful about this. "After the Battle with the Green Beast, one of our swordsmen gave his life to retrieve the Great Seven via his summons - but Nuibari was said to be lost."

Mito hummed and absently ran her fingers through the ends of her two-toned, hip-length hair. "I'm glad she's finally home, then."

Mei sat down again and they discussed the specifics of the new intelligence, coming up with ideas over the next few days to retrieve their people and fully take over Gato Industries.

Weeks later -

Mito smiled excitedly as she looked through Asuma's videos of Tokyo again. It was so big, bright, busy, and there were SO many people and so much cool-looking… everything! Even Konoha and the capital had neon lights and electricity, of course, but the Elemental Nations must appear to those in the West to be almost like something out of what they called Japan's Edo period or something. "Do you think they'll send me?"

Mito had been afraid to ask anyone else, thinking that might jinx her being able to travel abroad, to find their missing kids.

"It would make sense but I dunno, Mito," Asuma nearly mumbled. "It's up to your father."

"Yeah, but I'm perfect for the job," Mito insisted. Asuma had already been over there so he had to be a shoo-in, right? Especially with all he had learned about the internet and cybersecurity? It was important to convince him to let her go with him. "I'm a sensor; I can make hundreds of clones to do what needs to be done all at once, put together a seal on the fly…"

"I know," Asuma sighed.

"And I summon!"

"I know," Asuma said.

Mito could tell that he was getting irritated but she couldn't help herself. "But you want to take Kurenai."

She did not pout.

Oh, yes she did!

Asuma shrugged and got up to fetch some beer. "Of course, if I was sent, I'd want to take Kurenai! –Plus she'd be helpful over there."

Mito deadpanned. "How?"

"I'm gonna tell her you asked me that."

"Hey now," Mito implored, getting up from the floor to her knees to beg him not to. "Don't do that! I just know that Kurenai's not a sensor!"

Asuma gave her a dirty look. "We don't even know that I'll be assigned to it, Mito. Or that anyone will. I'm not supposed to know."

"Bullshit," Mito drawled, waving his concerns off. "You were assigned this whole thing in the first place."

"That's true," Asuma admitted. It had been his mission to find those missing kids. Right now, though, the Elemental Nations had a lot more than missing, untrained (or worse, partially-trained) kids to worry about. If he said that, Mito would probably pound him, though. "Just because I was originally assigned this mission doesn't mean that it will remain mine."

Mito hummed before tossing back a beer. "I know. But you make sense! Oh, and I can speak Spanish!"

"Yes, yes: you're super awesome." Momo-san says your Spanish is WEAK.

Mito knew he was being sarcastic but beamed up at him. "Thanks, As!"

"Shut up, idiot. Think about it, though, Mito. If those Westerners know they've got chakra users and we go in and rescue them, they'll know we did it. Peace - or stability - between our worlds could be destabilized."

"If they took our kids, then that's their fault, isn't it?" Mito replied haughtily.

Asuma knew that Mito was smarter than this. "I don't want to get nuked, thank you very much."

Mito didn't want that either - obviously. "I need to check the seals." Hell, she needed to research the seals that hid the Elemental Continent away. "Maybe I can see if Kurenai can make heads or tails out of the genjutsus that are said to be layered over the continent."

Asuma hummed, finding that very thought-provoking. "Shisui would be better."

"I'm gonna tell her you said that," Mito joked.

"Don't! –But see: you just admitted how useful an illusion would be in getting those kids back."

Mito took another swig of beer. Asuma was perfectly fine with genjutsus; he wouldn't necessarily need Kurenai for that. "Sure: when the move is made. But Kurenai - or whoever - would have to leave eventually." She narrowed her eyes on her brother, daring him to refuse her. "You two are not allowed to stay over there."

"Yuck," Asuma said, putting his thoughts about such an idea into one easily understood word. "It's too hectic for either of us."

Asuma had not enjoyed Tokyo at all and Kurenai wasn't even comfortable in Hi no Kuni's "bustling" capital. All of those people in Tokyo; all of that buzzing; the cars; all of that pollution had made him feel sick. "Think about the other part of the equation, though… Imagine being a kid that grew up with or has at least gotten used to all of that technology. Having the world at your fingertips, 24 hours a day."

Mito hummed, thinking that would be marvelous.

"How would they react: going from that to our neck of the literal woods, Mito? –There's a reason your mother was the only one who let us watch TV."

After a happily surprised second, Mito let out a breathy chuckle, remembering Asuma's parents having had a fit about that. "Mom really loved game shows."

Asuma smirked, remembering Kushina having a cow when someone was giving "stupid answers" or doing "stupid things" on game shows, always going into a rant about how much better she'd be on the show. "And she hated anime."

Mito tsk-ed, although her smile was watery and fond. "I never got why."

"Violence," Asuma assumed.

"While we were training to become ninjas," Mito grinned. She still missed her mom.

A lazy knock came from the other side of the front door and Mito pointed at it.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Asuma groaned and got up. Sure enough, just as they planned for every Thursday, their kids were here for Movie Night. This time Kurenai's team was in town and off-duty, too. "Yo."

"What are we watching tonight?" Ino asked, charging in ahead of her former classmates. "Mito-sensei," she began as everyone filed in, subtly throwing a glance at Kurenai to see how she and Asuma reacted to each other at the door. Sadly, she couldn't tell much.

Ino also wasn't in any way subtle, the adults thought.

"I know Asuma-sensei's too lazy to care but I was thinking…"

"You're in my home, you little brat," Asuma sighed before beginning to pass out soft drinks. Kurenai brought the snacks this time and gave him a wink.

"I know," Ino said, nonplussed. "It's just that with all of us here for once, the only ones we're missing is Team 7!"

Kurenai smirked at Mito - who began to pout and look miserable. She figured that was not only because Mito missed Naruto but because Mito didn't care too much for Sakura. Then there's the whole Kakashi thing. Those two were idiots. Perverted, Mostly-Celibate (to her knowledge) Idiots!

"I should probably go get her," Mito sighed in resignation.

"Don't forget Kakashi-sensei," Choji reminded her. Kiba and Shino groaned while Hinata broke out in quiet giggles.

"I'll be right back," MIto moaned as she walked out the door.

"That dumbass is probably sitting in a tree or laying in the dirt, chakra exhausted somewhere." Mito reached out her senses, and sure enough, followed them to a tree that Sakura was looking up into. The pink-haired girl had one hand on her hip and was shaking her other little fist into the air as she ranted at him.

"You can't keep escaping the hospital, Baka-sensei!"

Mito snorted. Kakashi jumped down in front of her. Fortunately, he seemed okay. "What did you do now?"

"Nothing, hime-sama," Kakashi smiled. "What are you doing here?"

Don't call me that. "Looking for you two."

Kakashi looked slowly and dramatically back and forth between the two females, finding that hard to believe. Sakura already looked nervous. Hehe.

"C'mon, you guys: we're going to Asuma's."

"Maa, it stinks over there," Kakashi commented but followed anyway. Mito agreed and Sakura soundly scolded him - something that Mito found pretty funny.

Mito turned and walked backward so that she could face them both. "Every Thursday night, we get together with the graduating ninjas from your class, Sakura. We watch movies and just hang out. Tonight's the first night all of the teams have been together since we started doing it…"

"So rude that I didn't even know," Kakashi lied.

"I'm sorry," Mito said sincerely. "Honestly, with mission and work schedules, there's rarely a night that it happens. But whoever's around makes time for it as much as we can," she smiled. Sakura had slowly stopped following and was rubbing her hands together awkwardly. "C'mon, Sakura!"

Sakura bit her lip. She knew that Mito-sensei didn't have the best impression of her and as hard as she was working to improve herself, Sakura knew that she had a long way to go. "I - I don't want to intrude."

"NONsense," Mito drawled. Now she really did feel bad. It had to be so difficult having both your Genin teammates out of the country; one of them - no, make that both of them - doing God only knows what. She draped an arm around her shoulder. Sakura was tiny. "Really. You know what my schedule's like at the hospital, plus I have to run missions and with Kiri…"

"And she's in ANBU," Kakashi interrupted, grinning more as he dodged Mito's expected but sudden lunge.

"You're NOT supposed to say that, Kaka-sensei." Sakura already knew it, though. Mito and Kakashi each had very distinctive hair (and both of them wore canine-like masks when on ANBU duty) - although recently all of the ANBUs I've seen are brunettes. "Hmm."

"Your students call you poop," Mito snickered at him.

Sakura covered a laugh. She hadn't thought of "kaka" being another word for poop before - in terms of her Genin sensei. "Poop!" Mito was a medical professional. Calling poop "poop" was funny. It made her feel a little more comfortable. "You're sure it's okay?"

"Heck, yeah," Mito grinned. Maybe Sakura and Hinata could become better friends; Hinata really needed some more girls her age to hang out with. Tenten and Hinata were always following her and Anko around. So cute. "Oh, yeah, Kakashi: we senseis trade off between us on where movie night is held."

Kakashi gave her a dry look. "Oh, hell no."

"Oh hell, yes!"

"I don't even know where Kaka-sensei lives," Sakura admitted. She hadn't thought about it before.

Mito wasn't surprised. "He lives in the trees."

"Mmhm," Kakashi agreed. "Which is why we can't do movie night there." That and I don't like people at my place.

"...Chakra-exhausted and waiting for someone to save him."

"I am going to so enjoy stabbing you." Mito laughed and Kakashi scolded himself for exactly how he wanted to repeatedly stab her.

"Oh, shit. Kakashi," Mito said, her eyes going wide. Since around the Chunin Exams, Gai's team always joined the rookies for their big training sessions, too. "Gai's team is in town tonight, too, aren't they?"

Kakashi glared at her - and then tossed her over his shoulder and started hauling ass. "No Gai!"

"But Gai's so cool!" She immediately gave up and decided to watch Kakashi's thick thighs and ass as he lept through the trees, really wanting to give his butt a poke to see if it had any give. "And what if he finds out?! HURRY UP, SAKURA!"

Sakura followed along a little more quickly, unsure of where they were going.

Ino grabbed Sakura and gave her a hug as soon as they walked in the door. Sakura smiled, feeling so glad that she came as everyone greeted her so warmly. She was a little surprised Ino dragged her over to sit between her and Hinata, whom they'd never been very close to. Hinata even had snacks and a drink for her. "Thanks, guys."

Sakura nearly wanted to cry! She'd seen both Hinata and Ino around at the hospital but that was just it. Working under Lady Tsunade, she ONLY saw people at the hospital anymore.

Kakashi continued carrying Mito on his shoulder around Asuma's apartment while she argued with Asuma and gathered snacks for the both of them. Mito's boy brats were giving him dirty looks but he was staking his claim or at least letting everyone know they could fuck off if they had a problem with it.

"What is happening?" Sakura asked Ino in a whisper of horrified fascination.

"Kakashi-sensei is in love with Mito-sensei," Ino whispered from under the cover of her hand. Sakura gasped, a toad-like croaking sound coming from her chest and throat, and fell back in shock.

"How horrible!"

Hinata was grateful that the Jonins and most of the boys were being really loud arguing about movies right now because otherwise, the Jonins would've heard them. Knowing those two senseis as well as she did, she figured they would attack. Or worse, they'd prank us. "Ano. I believe they are bo- both unaware. They are each… somewhat s-socially incompetent or um, odd- or have a lack of s- self-awareness?!"

Sakura broke out in laughter, not having expected that. "Are you serious?" Both girls nodded at her. "Oh, that is just sad!"

As much as Mito enjoyed the Men in Black movies, three of them were a lot, back to back. Also "a lot" was the way the Genins bickered and tried to spoil parts of each of the movies for each other.

She hadn't seen those movies in a long time, dammit!

"What's the matter?" Kakashi asked.

Mito shrugged but glanced significantly toward where the three girls were sitting together. Hinata looked sad and she guessed it was because Ino and Sakura had renewed their long-term friendship. It looked like Hinata was feeling a little excluded.

Kakashi sighed. "The things I give up for you," he whispered to himself, groaning and running a hand through his tangly hair. "Fine. Gai's team can come next time - but not to my place."

Mito smiled and threw herself at him, giving him a big hug even though she'd planned to invite Team 9 anyway. Naturally, Kakashi threw her off of him and she crawled back, smiling happily and ignoring her students' grumblings although she'd landed pretty hard on Sai and Shino. "I don't understand your relationship."

"Maa, you don't need to!" Mito let out a distracting little whimper but Kakashi was not giving in. She leaned closer to him, whispering in his ear and giving him goosebumps.

"Is it because you're lovers?"

For Kakashi, time froze. He eventually began choking.

"I won't tell anyone!"

Kakashi couldn't even look at her. "I can't believe you thought that!"

"You're being mean," Mito half-scolded/half-whined as they walked away from Asuma's place, having left the kids (half of them asleep) behind at Asuma's. "What are you, homophobic?"

"Of course not!"

"Well, I'm just saying," Mito mumbled, feeling bad that she'd upset him so much. "I'm sorry. It was none of my business anyway."

"'None of her business,' she says," Kakashi muttered angrily to himself. What did he have to do to get her attention?! Was he going to have to say it? –Oh no, he couldn't possibly do that.

"I mean…" Mito didn't know what to say! She should've kept her damn mouth closed but she and Kakashi had been spending a lot of time with each other. She was curious! "You're both attractive people."

Kakashi stopped stomping forward and narrowed his eye at her. "You think I'm attractive?"

Mito immediately blushed up to her roots.

Kakashi smirked, happy again. That reaction was telling. "I'll make you breakfast."

Mito guessed that meant that they were okay. "You can cook?"

"Unlike some people," he said, giving her a dry but amused look. Mito blushed even harder.

"I didn't know… I mean, you're usually eating out - when I see you, anyway."

"You spend a lot of time watching me," Kakashi teased.

"You and Gai." Kakashi growled, hopefully pretending to be agitated again, making Mito laugh.

He spun around and Mito ran into him. Kakashi threw up a genjutsu around him, smirking when Mito's eyes went wide and turned a more brilliant shade of violet. "You're not interested in him, are you?"

"Who?"

Kakashi let out a low growl. "Gai!"

"Oh, um. He's a wonderful, very interesting, dynamic person with a great physique - but um… not like that."

"Hm." Kakashi grabbed her hand and began dragging her through the village. First, they needed to pick up some groceries… He'd give her a break for now: saying that thing about Gai's "physique." He'd been working hard and bulking up, dammit!

Mito squeaked and wondered what was happening!

"What is happening?!" Genma whispered after ducking into an alley. He scowled at Kakashi when he passed him, dragging Mito along beside him. –At least that's what it looked like to him. Clearly, Kakashi had scratched his mop of mocking, stupid gray hair with his middle finger, not-so-subtly flipping him off.

Raido sighed. "They're both idiots." And yet I'm the guy who allowed himself to be half-stuffed into a trash can so we can hide from them.

"Kakashi's a genius and Minato-sama said that Mito's IQ is close to 200," Iwashi reported - as if they hadn't been together when he'd said it.

"Yeah, but they're IDIOTS." Raido wondered how they couldn't see that. They'd known Kakashi since they were all kids.

"175 isn't close to 200." Genma had looked into it. "Someone should tell Hokage-sama."

Raido hopped out of the trash can and wagged his finger. "NO. Look, Gen. I know you're hot for her but that would be the wrong move."

Iwashi nodded. "Yeah, man. Their relationship is not exactly solid!"

"If Mito found out you went to her father, she probably wouldn't want to even be friends with you." Hell, I might not want to be friends with you!

Genma pursed his lips, incredibly frustrated. "He's making a move!"

Iwashi dropped his head back and sighed in aggravation. "He doesn't see anyone in the village." Really, Iwashi wasn't sure if Kakashi even liked women.

"Except for Mito," Raido said, flinching at the dirty look he got for it. "Sorry."

"And I've heard some of the kunoichis talk about him: Kakashi doesn't favor kunoichis," Iwashi continued.

"Except for MITO," Genma reminded them, having seen the two of them together all the freaking time lately.

"I know you're frustrated," Iwashi said, grasping Genmas shoulders. "Just think about it: Shizune says that she's not opposed to a fourth."

Genma groaned. He was really frustrated, though.

"It could be a one-time thing, just to blow off some steam," Raido half-lied. Truthfully, he was worried that Shizune might be a little TOO into it. Then again, he might be more into it than he would allow himself to consider.

"We're all bi, curious, and hot," Iwashi explained as if he had to. "Well, you know… You guys are." He had a scar.

"Ah, c'mon, 'Washi! You're the cutest out of all of us."

Iwashi snorted and grinned bashfully. "That's probably true."

Shizune stood up and grabbed her haori as she walked out. "I'm not doing this."

.

After she was gone, Raido gaped at the newbie. "What the fuck, Genma?"

Genma ran his hand through his hair. "I knew this was a mistake."

"What was a mistake was asking our lover about another woman," Raido said - as if he had to. "You need to get over yourself."

"I know… I know; I'm sorry!"

Iwashi ran his hands down his face. "Look. You've never been in a relationship with more than one person so I get that..."

"Yes, I have!"

"Well, then what the FUCK, Genma?!"

Genma felt sick. "I'm just… That girl's got me all messed up!"

Raido and Iwashi looked at each other, worry etched on their faces. "You've done this before."

"Yeah," Genma said, feeling terrible. "But it was with two girls."

"That's not what I meant," Iwashi gritted out. "I meant that you've been head over heels before…"

"It wasn't the right one," the other two said at the same time, (Genma meaning it while Raido was making fun of Genma.)

"Fine," Genma huffed, grabbing his discarded flak jacket after putting his shirt back on. "Be that way." He stormed out.

"Shit."

"This is why I wasn't so sure about this," Iwashi admitted. "I know we talked about it."

Raido held out his arms for him, breathing out a sigh of warm relief when Iwashi was safely in his arms again. "Do you think he'll be okay?"

"We need to keep an eye on him."

Raido nodded, already planning on it. "Gen's going to do something stupid, isn't he?"