I Don't Own Fnaf

Marionette, because one day's worth of memories weren't enough to make him think of himself as Sam, had to eventually break away from Mike who was being incredibly patient with him, waiting until the puppet was ready to start talking, though he had no idea just what he was supposed to say... Eventually settling on telling the man about what all he remembered, explaining it off and on, having to pause a few times from foreign emotions he knew were his own flooded and overwhelmed him at parts, Mike just sat there, listening, before-

"Do you remember the kids that forced you out there?" The puppet just paused, he had just finished saying everything he had remembered, but he wasn't sure why that was the part the man had focused on out of everything else, turning back to look at Mike, as he had admittedly been floating back and forth in front of the couch so he wouldn't run out of steam, and frowned at the sight before him. Mike's hands were clenched into tight fists and while his face didn't change too much, it didn't take a genius to figure out that the man was angry.

Floating back up to the couch, he reached out and placed a hand on the man's tense shoulder, saying softly, "I'm fine Mike" The man just stared ahead before saying.

"If you ever see one of them, tell me" Marionette gave the man a short look, ignoring the faint warmth in his chest at just how protective the man sounded, he didn't feel a particular grudge towards a bunch of kids that didn't know any better, but... Seeing this side of Mike was rare and the puppet found himself wanting to see more of it after the things he had been forced to remember, as he couldn't help but ask.

"And what are you going to do?" The man answered simply and quickly.

"You don't want to know" Marionette just raised an eyebrow.

"I think I do" Mike just stared ahead, before looking away.

"Fine, you don't have to tell me, but... Are you alright?" Marionette paused, trying to figure out just what the answer to that really was. He... He didn't know if there was an answer to that, so he decided to focus on something else, someone else really. He had to know, the emotions weren't his, at least they didn't really feel like his yet, one memory wasn't enough, but it was a start, and he wasn't going to be able to hide from this, and the... The idea he had family out there... It made him speak what he did.

"I don't know... Charlie... When did she leave?"

"Soon after you passed out, we talked for a bit about what I thought was happening, you remembering and it overwhelming you. I didn't think you'd be out for so long, I offered for her to stay, but she... I think she was even less ready for this than you were. She didn't know you were here, she was just looking for answers, and knew I probably had them all" Mari just nodded, unsure just what all that meant for them, as he asked carefully.

"Do you think I should talk to her?"

"Do you want to?"

"Yes, I- I think I miss her... I don't... I remember how I feel about her, she's my sister, but..."

"Maybe you should talk to Evan about this? He probably knows a lot about reconnecting with siblings from your side of the fence than I do"

"That's probably a good idea... What are we going to tell the others?"

"What do you want to tell them?" He… Marionette wanted to tell the others, wanted to tell Goldie and Foxy that he was finally remembering, wanted their advice and help, wanted to show to the others that he was a person, that he used to be just as much as them. But… But what did he really have to show that? Should he wait until he had more than just the barest scrap of a name and idea of what his life might have been like?

"I-... I don't want to hide this, this is my life, and they should know... I want to tell them, but I barely remember anything, is it worth bringing up?" Mike just shrugged.

"It's your choice, Stripes, but I'll support whatever you want to do... What about us?" Marionette let out a confused chime, as the man clarified, "I mean, you don't remember it, your childhood that is, but I do. Does this... Change anything?"

"Why would it?" Marionette fidgeted a bit, suddenly worried, as Mike just shrugged, looking away, picking at his fingers for a moment, before explaining it in simple terms.

"Mari, I babysat you for most of your childhood, does that make this... weird?" That... the puppet had no idea what to think about that, he didn't know really, he didn't remember that, but there was a faint wiggling feeling in the back of his mind, like there was a memory there that he couldn't pull on, well, it was something he had been feeling since he had woken up, but this was more... active than the others, like talking about it was making the pressure stronger, it was weird.

"Does this change anything for you?" Mike just shrugged, waiting a moment to speak, seemingly trying to gather the right words to explain what he was thinking as Marionette waited as patiently as he could, doing his best to not feel nervous about something that suddenly felt way too important. What if Mike said he couldn't do this anymore? The puppet wasn't sure he could handle that. No he was sure he couldn't handle that, he couldn't lose Mike, the man was the reason the puppet had managed this long through it all, without him... Thankfully Mike finally spoke.

"We spent, what? Nine years apart growing, and a full year together without knowing it. People are very different than they were when they were kids, you're obviously not the same, I'm certainly not, so I don't think it matters that much, we got together without knowing about any of that, and knowing isn't going to change who we are, and that's the part I love about you. It's probably going to be weird for a while until we find a new normal, but, I mean, I'm willing to do that... Just don't know how I feel about being the star in what feels like a romcom, preferred it when it was just horror" Marionette just slowly nodded along for most of that, before freezing at that last part before staring at Mike, saying incredibly unimpressed.

"That's really your biggest concern?" Mike nodded, looking completely serious.

"Of course" He continued to stare ahead for a moment, before finally breaking at the look on Marionette's face, letting out a faint laugh as Marionette just huffed.

"Is this really the best time for jokes?" Mike just shrugged.

"Are you really asking me that?" Right, this was Mike, the man joked in the face of death, like this was going to change that... Honestly, it made Marionette laugh a little bit to himself as well, he did love that about Mike, as serious as he took everything, he never let that stop him from trying to keep the air light for everyone else.

"You're a dork, and here I was remembering how cool I used to think you were" Mike just blinked, before saying slightly stupefied it seemed like, a wonderful expression on the man as far as the puppet was concerned.

"You thought I was cool? I mean, obviously, but seriously?" Marionette just shrugged, saying back teasingly.

"Clearly I was mistaken, no idea what kid me must have been thinking, I have much better tastes now" Mike just stared before letting out a faint laugh, leaning forwards a bit as he moved to stand, getting close to the puppet as he said.

"Oh? Is that so?" The two just stared at each other, neither backing down, Marionette wondering just which of them would be the one to commit, but like always it was Mike who bulldozed ahead, smirking a bit, as he said leaning to cover the small bit of remaining space, "Good to know you're into dorks" The puppet let out a surprised but delighted chime as he was pulled into a hug that Marionette quickly did his best to turn into a kiss. He felt the tension in his metal form melt just a bit, maybe it was a bit poor in timing, but frankly the puppet really needed this, as he leaned in to get more of what Mike was willing to give him.

Mike admittedly was pretty sure that learning that your ghost boyfriend was in fact someone he had known well from his childhood was not supposed to transition into making out with said boyfriend, but, frankly, he didn't care, didn't care about any of that at the moment. Sam, Mari, it didn't matter, he wouldn't let it matter, hours of concern and worry were melted away from Mari just being himself, and Mike forced his head to get the message that his damaged heart was screaming, it didn't matter who the puppet was, because Mike loved that person no matter what, and like hell was he not going to show that to the animatronic.

And if that meant ignoring all of their impressive amounts of other problems by trying to turn the animatronic into a puddle of puppet goo in his arms through an admittedly very intense make out session, then that was more than fine with him.

Honestly, Mike had no interest in seeing just how long he could go without air nowadays before that moment, now he just wanted to see just how many new sounds the puppet could let out, they were definitely going for a record here... Which was why he was admittedly a bit disappointed when the sound of his phone, that was in his pocket, began to ring. He was honestly willing to just ignore it, but Mari had placed a hand on his chest just enough to cause them to separate as he stared at the puppet who was actively trembling with nerves but clearly trying to be responsible.

"Y-you should... probably answer that" Mike really didn't want to, he still wasn't super big on the action of kissing, but right now he just wanted to see how far he could push Mari... But the puppet had a point, still, Mike couldn't help but ask as the two separated enough for him to get to his phone.

"Worried that you're going to overheat?" Mari let out a low flustered sound.

"I- I think I already am" Mike... chose to focus on the phone before he could get too smug about that... And felt the good mood drop a bit as he saw the caller ID, as he looked over to Mari, before saying carefully.

"It's Charlie" The puppet tensed for a moment, the trembling almost gone in an instant, before finally he nodded, as Mike took a moment to gather himself before flipping the phone open before the call could go to voicemail, holding it up to his ear as he said casually down the line.

"Hello hello"

H-hey, Michael, it's me"

"Are you alright? You left in a bit of a hurry" He glanced over at Mari for a moment, seeing the open concern on his face, before pulling the phone away, quickly putting it on speaker, as Charlie said.

"I- I know, I'm sorry, I just... It was too much, is... Is he alright?" Mike was still watching the puppet's face, seeing the way his mask flickered over about a dozen emotions, before saying back.

"Yeah, he's fine, just got knocked down by some pretty intense memories"

"So... So he remembered something? Did he remember me?"

"Uh, something like that, one of his birthdays, so you were kind of included by default. Listen, animatronics getting their memories back isn't a one and done thing, he's been trying to remember things for a long time now, this is the first time he got one that was so... concrete and full, but don't expect him to know everything right away"

"Ri-ight, it's just... I miss him" Mike felt his chest ache a bit as he said back a small edge of sympathy bleeding into his tone.

"I get it, I really get it... Listen, you said you weren't ready, but Mari- He wants to talk, so just... How are you feeling about that?"

"I-... Is he... there?" Mike glanced up and stared at the puppet who was staring at the phone with massively wide eyes like he couldn't believe the voice he was hearing, as Mike said casually.

"Uh, yeah, he's here. Do you want to talk? Doing it over the phone might help"

"I- Uh... Well-" Before Charlie could seem to get an answer ready, Mari was the one that spoke up next, his voice coming out a bit too loud, showing off just how nervous he was, as he said leaning towards the phone.

"Charlie?" The sound of the hitching of breath on the other end of the line was clear and sharp, as after a moment Charlie asked, her voice filled with an almost desperate hope

"S-Sammy?" Mari glanced over at Mike, fidgeting a bit already, clearly uncertain of just what to say to such a simple but loaded question, the man wished he had an answer, but it wasn't his choice nor his right to act like he had any idea what the right move was, instead only being able to hold the puppet's eyes to let him know that Mike was there for him, as Mari finally said.

"Y-yeah, hey Charlie"

O-Oh my god... I'm... Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine... Do you want to come over? I think we have some things we need to talk about" The line was quiet for a long moment, before Charlie finally said.

"Uh, sure, I'll be there in twenty?" She didn't sound all that sure, but clearly wasn't able to build up the strength to be able to say no to her brother after all this time. Mike wondered if that's how he had been last year when he had first found Evan... Well, no, because he never took his brother's requests as possible because they involved him leaving and never returning, and Mike had a pretty good feeling Mari wouldn't be thinking about that.

"See you then" Getting a nod from the puppet Mike flipped the phone shut to end the call... And promptly watched as Mari immediately sunk to the ground, his hands coming to be placed over his mask as he let out the musical equivalent of a distressed whine. Mike could only sigh, lowering himself down carefully, before rubbing the puppet's back as he said.

"Are you alright?"

"Why did I ask her over now?!"

"I mean, you did say you wanted to see her"

"Later, not this second! I-I'm not ready, but I just started talking and then I kept talking and now she's going to be here in a minute, and-" Mike reached out, carefully pulling the puppet's hands away from his face so he didn't have a choice but to see Mike, as the man said calmly.

"Do you want me to call her back and say that you can't today?"

"But I already said-" Mike cut that off, saying a bit more firmly but still managing to hold the softness to his voice.

"And I can say something different, if you aren't ready, then you don't need to force yourself, this just happened, it's alright if you need a day to figure out what you want to do next" The puppet just stared up at him and Mike was quickly broken from his certainty as he saw as faint lines of purple began to drip down and sliding down to cover over the orange stripes that Mari had been so proud of just the day before.

"Please?" Mike didn't need to hear more, as he just nodded, leaning down and carefully pulling Mari up to sit him on the couch, before pulling out his phone, making the call and while it was ringing reaching up and trying to work on the tears with the sleeve of his jacket, the puppet fidgeted about but let Mike care for him even as he let out a faintly embarrassed chime.

The line connected, and Mike was quick to say that they'd have to take a raincheck, apologizing but taking the weight of the 'mistake' on his shoulders, saying they needed to go to the Cove and help make sure they were in working order for the next week and that he needed the puppet for some reason he had already forgot about five seconds after he gave the lie. Charlie probably knew he was lying, but she didn't press it, saying it was fine, though Mike wasn't deaf enough to miss the faint relief in her voice as she said it. He had the feeling she wasn't quite ready for a face to face confrontation either.

And that was that, as he turned back to the puppet, asking carefully.

"Do you want to actually head in or do you want me to call Fritz and Jeremy and let them know they'll be without us?" Mari just shrugged at first, seemingly unable to come up with any kind of decision, before saying softly.

"You don't have to stay, you can go in, I'll be fine" Mike couldn't help but frown, even if he tried to quickly hide it a second later, asking carefully.

"Do you want to be alone for a while?" The puppet fidgeted about for a moment, before eventually slowly nodding, quickly however letting out a faint chime as he said.

"I- I'm not running you off, you're being amazing for me right now... I just... I think I need some time to really think about this for myself" Mike slowly nodded, he was pretty sure he understood where the animatronic was coming from, though he really did wish that he could do something more, the idea that he wasn't what the puppet needed was one that burned, no matter how silly it was to get hold up on it. Mari needed some time to think about this, and Mike would respect that, as he said.

"Alright, come on, let's get you cleaned up at least before I have to take a shower and get ready for the day" That got a small huffing chime from Mari, as he seemed to look Mike over a bit more closely, before saying simply.

"You need it, you look like a mess" Mike just rolled his eyes, saying back.

"That's because I'm still half zombified"

"Only half?" He said it teasingly, but there was a faint pained chime right after that meant the puppet had instantly regretted what he had said, while Mike said right back.

"Right, one and a half zombified? One and twenty percent? I don't know how much is being added to me from the outfit now that the makeup's off" Mari paused for a short moment, clearly debating about keeping the banter on this kind of subject going, before carefully saying.

"Seventy at most, you're not after enough brains to even be a whole number" Mike laughed at that, saying as the two continued to the bathroom where a number of wipes were held for cleaning up the puppet and in general needed things for Mike's own hygiene.

"Yeah? What do you think I'm into then? Databases? Memory chips? What do you have in that head?" Mari just swatted at him, but there was a pleased little hum that was coming from the puppet that meant Mike had been doing his job well. Maybe he couldn't be here for the puppet for most of the day, even at the puppet's own request, but that didn't mean he couldn't at least make sure for the time he was here, to keep Mari's mood from being anything foul.

Though all too soon he was walking out of the door, a faint sense of worry filling his chest that he did his best to ignore, unable to shake the faint feeling and the knowing that if it was him, he wouldn't have wanted to be alone for even a moment. Mari had been there for him this entire time, and it felt wrong that he wasn't there to be able to do the same.

All the same, he got into his car, debated for a long moment about just what he needed to tell the others and what Mari himself would be alright with him telling, before finally pulling out onto the road as he left for the Cove.

Goldie was a bit concerned, as he glanced around to see what everyone else was feeling at the moment, they were mostly fine, Foxy looked a bit concerned, even if the fox hid it well, but that was the most extreme reaction among the group at the news Mike had unceremoniously dropped on them all. He hadn't given them a ton of information, for the sake of the puppet's privacy, but hearing that the animatronic had an extreme enough memory coming back that he wasn't able to come in and help, and the fact that Michael had agreed and was here now spoke volumes about how serious it was for Marionette.

And for Michael, the man might be good at hiding what was going on in his head, but the bear knew his brother could see the faint concern that wasn't shown on his face.

Still, he didn't bring it up, they had things to do and he knew all too well how he would have felt if someone had asked him a million questions about something so personal. Of course, he doubted Michael or Mari would blow up over it as much as he suspected he would... and had, but the point stood well enough that he wasn't going to bother, and instead just moved with the others around the Cove cleaning the place up as his mind wandered onto other things.

He hadn't gotten a call from Samantha in a few days now, he shouldn't care, they didn't know each other, but there was a part of him that had come to expect the calls at least once every day or so, and now that they had just stopped it was... Unsettling and more disappointing than he wanted to admit to himself, but he focused on the unsettling aspect of it more. She had sounded like she had been nervous, and he was worried that something had happened given just how long it had been since he had gotten an update about the situation.

It didn't sound like a tense situation, but maybe she had been holding something back? If Evan were to ever talk about what he went through, he wouldn't have explained it all in its true detail, maybe she had done the same as he had? It made something in his chest burn with concern and frankly he didn't like it. Being concerned was such a constant state he had been in the last little while that it was aggravating that there was another person out there that managed to make the bear feel like that.

The list had been growing more and more over the last year and he honestly had no idea just what he was supposed to feel about that.

But in the end it didn't matter right now as he went around, picking up some of the machines that they had used, one being a big fog machine that Foxy had a bit to much fun with the day before and it was a minor miracle that the thing didn't get trampled on by a large metal fox foot on accident.

It was while he was carrying the machine, heading out to the back of the building to put it in the back of the van so it could be driven back to wherever they had gotten it from, when suddenly Jeremy was just there. The man was impressively quiet as the bear let out a faint sound of surprise that was broken up by the sounds of his creaking body. It had been getting louder and louder to him, his hollow inside made it almost feel like an echo in his chest, it was annoying but nothing important enough to think about as Jeremy spoke up, looking a bit sheepish.

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you" Goldie just huffed, like Jeremy would be the one to scare him, but he didn't say anything more as the man continued to speak, "I was just hoping to catch you alone for a moment, wanted to talk to you about something" The bear just nodded slowly, unsure just what this was about, the two talked a good bit already, given he was the one that had taken up the role of primary driver of the van, the two often had twenty minutes in the morning and evening just driving around town to talk, and they had just had that moment not to long ago, so it was a bit weird that he was asking now when they were already at the Cove.

"Alright?"

"It's about Bonnie" Goldie just nodded again, the man had been making an effort to talk to the animatronic, frankly the bear didn't see much of the point to be honest, the animatronic was a massive brat. Even if recently he hadn't been quite as annoying, the bear figured it was just a matter of time all things considered until he did something to piss him off again.

"What about him?"

"Well... What was he like... You know, back then?" That gave the bear pause for a moment, as he glanced back at Jeremy for a long moment, before sighing, moving forwards and pulling himself up into the van, waving for the man to follow. He had the feeling that this wasn't going to be a quick conversation, and he'd rather not stand out in the open, even if no one should be walking around the back of the Cove, the bear didn't feel like chancing that.

"Why do you want to know?" It felt at least important enough to ask, even if Goldie wasn't sure he cared that much and he already had a pretty good idea of it, the man had a bleeding heart worse than anyone he's ever met, with how Jeremy had been acting about with Ennard, Goldie figured it only made sense that his weird hero complex thing onto the rabbit next.

"I just... I want to help him, and I think I'm getting somewhere, but I talked to him about some stuff not too long about, the Cove was brought up, and I just... I was wondering what it was like back then, I know you don't know much, but Mari isn't here, and I'm not sure I should ask him anyways, he's going through a lot and this Bonnie thing hasn't been... Good for him I feel like" The bear just slowly nodded, he wasn't blind to how little the puppet had visited the warehouse, even though he figured when it had been clear that Bonnie was up again he'd have to bribe Michael to get the animatronic out of the place.

He hadn't really thought too hard about it, and no one seemed to think he needed to be told about it either, so he hadn't really put much effort into wondering why, but now that Jeremy was saying there was something happening there... The bear ignored the faint curiosity for the moment, instead just nodding and saying back.

"Alright... I looked in a lot during that time, it was when the original four were taken out of storage and... broken up for parts. Then the toys were made, and then... that first week, I'm sure I don't need to tell you about that part" Jeremy grimaced, a pained look coming over his face, and Goldie knew the man knew what he was talking about, the pizzeria had almost gone under in just one week, there had been a set murders, six in total, and if Goldie was right, Jeremy either had been one of the guards during that time or had been hired afterwards, hearing about it from the others, while over time more went missing it was around that time the pizzeria got good at covering it's tracks, either way...

"That's what caused Marionette to give the gifts to the toys, almost all at once... They were different from the original four and Spring Bonnie... Maybe not, maybe I was just as young as the originals were, and wasn't when the toys came around... I wasn't close to them, I didn't reach out to them like I did with Foxy and the others, they were Marionette's group. He... He was protective over all of them, but more so of the toys, they were the youngest. And the toys adored him in return, Toy Bonnie was one of the worst"

He paused at this point, the faint fuzzy memories of those years coming back in more focus than he was comfortable with, he remembered seeing all those events slowly play out over the course of the months that that second Freddy's had been opened, but that didn't mean he had been there. He had been trapped in the Diner back then, years of time stuck in place, unable to move, unable to do anything. Years of that single state were not what he wanted to recall right now, but he was doing it anyway as he just pushed on, continuing the explanation to get it over with now.

"He was always... Dramatic, showy, things like that. Drove Spring Bonnie mad, he was more in it for tormenting the night guards than getting revenge, or maybe that was his way of revenge, it doesn't matter. He was dramatic and a show off, and that's about it from what I know from how he acted during the nights, but... None of us were fully there back then, the most aware would have been Marionette or Spring Bonnie, but one's gone and the other you say you don't want to ask" Goldie ignored the faint twisting in his springs at the memories of his once friend, maybe still was...

Spring Bonnie, stuck just like him, he missed her as much if not more than the three original animatronics that didn't get to stay. Even now her betrayal to get what she wanted burned like hell when he thought too much about it. Thankfully before he was forced to deal with more memories, Jeremy spoke up.

"I see... I guess that makes sense, right..." He seemed to debate something for a long moment, before asking carefully, "What do you think about Bonnie? I mean, I get you aren't a big fan of what he did, but... According to Mari he's just a kid. Probably not even fifteen" Goldie could only shrug. A faint uncomfortable shift in his chest as he thought about how to answer that... Before deciding to just be honest.

"I think he's a brat... But I haven't tried to kick him out of the warehouse for a reason. He deserves to have somewhere he feels safe being at the very least, and this is about the best I reckon we have" Jeremy nodded, looking a bit uncertain about something, but with a small smile on his face as well, something that looked a bit like... Goldie would say pride, but he must have been mistaken, given he had no idea just what that was about, and before he could think too much more about it, the man spoke up again, confusing the bear enough that he didn't bother trying to figure the look out any further.

"I mean... That's not exactly true... What do you think Bonnie would say if I asked if he wanted to move into my apartment?" Goldie just stared at the man, before being able to ask the only question he could think of.

"Do you have internal bleeding with how much of a bleeding heart you are?" He probably should have felt bad, but he was just honestly a bit too exasperated by the fact that he knew the man was fully serious... Even if he had to admit to himself, the idea that the animatronic being someplace else and not around pestering him did seem like a nice idea... Even if he was sure the rabbit would somehow make them all regret this decision... "Actually, you should ask him as soon as possible"

He was sure that Jeremy could probably handle it, and it would be nice to not feel a bit like he was playing warden in his own damn home.

Marionette... Sam? Sammy? Mari? Marion, Stripes, Net... He had so many names he had no idea what to do with them all of a sudden, a problem he couldn't have imagining having a year ago, or honestly even a few weeks ago, he hadn't ever thought hard about what he went by and what he was called, not like the others, but now all of a sudden he needed to make that choice...

Mari.

He hadn't ever really thought himself as Mari, it was always Marionette, even in his own mind, but he wasn't just The Marionette, he was a person as well, a person that was once a human boy named Sam, but he wasn't human anymore either, hadn't been in a long time, so... If he wasn't quite either, then Mari, the name Mike gave him. He could hold that as an anchor for all of this, much like the man himself had been for the puppet.

He felt awful soon after the man had left, he had been so sure that he needed a moment to himself, to think it all through, and he did believe that he did need it, but the second Mike was gone it was suddenly just harder to handle it all, he felt a bit pathetic because of it, the others never had help right? He should be able to handle this much, if anything he should be thrilled... But instead he was just... not scared, but not all that excited as he had hoped to be.

He didn't have much in terms of family. Just his sister from what he had heard from Mike, which... wasn't that such a hard thing to wrap his head around, having a sister, having a family.

He could remember the face of a man that he had called his father... Henry Emily... His dad was one of the creators of Freddy's... Was that why he had such a strong need to protect the pizzerias he had watched over during his tenure as the 'Prize Corner Attendant'? Had... Had his father known about him? Did it matter? He'd never know, the man was gone, Mike had told him that, and now...

Now Mari just felt... Sad, he could only remember faint moments of the man, but he could feel the feelings in his chest thrumming, the grief of missing the person that he suddenly felt like he had never had the chance to get to know. It was crushing, somehow just as, if not potentially worse than the crushing weight of pain that came from seeing life in the pizzerias over the years be broken down and crushed. He had lost friends, animatronics that he had considered family, but he had at least known them, had known and could take comfort in the fact that he knew he had done everything he possibly could to help them, to protect and keep them safe.

He didn't have anything like that now, it was just another senseless death, and that ached in his chest, even as he wondered with a vivid curiosity about just what his father had been like, what his mother was still like, he didn't remember much about her. She taught him to bake, he knew that, though he couldn't recall those memories, that safety that came from being in the kitchen, something in the oven cooking, had come from her... And he felt an almost crushing sense of longing and sadness with the knowing that he'd probably never get that feeling from such an experience again.

In a way, it was everything he had feared about learning who he had been, knowing everything he was missing from the life he could have had, the experiences that he was robbed of.

And it hurt.

As the feelings of it all made a distressed and static chord press itself out of his music box, hammering home how different he was from all the other people in the world. He never had disliked his music box before, but now he felt his chest hurt as he forcefully jammed the thing in his chest, the pick that was supposed to strike the notes wedging itself in place, as a strained ticking sound came out instead of the normal chiming melody.

He wasn't sure it was better, in fact it was already aching, but it was at least not his own emotions playing back in his own ears, like a mocking echo.

Mari just felt like a mess, it was one memory, one day, and he was already in this state of second guessing everything, it was just silly, but even as he tried to rationalize that to himself, it didn't seem to do anything in way of making him feel better.

He also wasn't going to get anything about all these half thoughts and not even formed memories that those strange and foreign emotions made him wish he both had and had never had to deal with... There was no going back though, there was no yesterday that he could return to... And no matter how he felt in this moment, there was never a yesterday that he'd want to return to. His life now was incredible, far past anything he had ever expected for himself in his time as The Marionette.

So the only thing to do was to take that first step forward, to just... deal with it, to keep every next day better than the last.

Easier said than done, he had no idea just how he would manage that, even if he was trying to keep himself hopeful before he could fall back into any kind of emotional spiral, even as he kept his music pick firmly wedged as he finally floated off the couch he had more or less been half flopped against for the last half an hour or so of existential dread...

Was this what Mike went through on his bad days? Mari made the mental note that he needed to hug that man more often.

Shaking the random thought off, he floated in the living room, trying to figure out what to do next, when a faint memory came back to his mind of something that had happened months and months ago now, as he looked around for a moment, searching for something that he knew wasn't in the living room, as he wracked his head trying to remember where Mike had ended up putting them... It was in the storage closet right? The one that they didn't use to hold the cleaning stuff.

Floating quickly to where that closet was in the hall leading off from the living room to the first floor bedrooms and guest bathroom, there was a single short door that he stopped in front of, the hallway closet. Mari reached out to the knob of a hand only to hesitate for a brief moment... Committing before he could start to over think it, he pulled the door open, peering inside for a moment, searching... There!

On one of the higher shelves was a set of a few photo albums. Mike had brought one out to show his brother to help the bear jog his memories. If it worked for Goldie, then it stood to reason that it should work for him as well right? His boyfriend had also mentioned one holding pictures of family friends, and the Emily's would fall into that category.

It felt weird, thinking back on it now, Mike mentioning the puppet's original name and his family's name to him, telling him about his own disappearance without Mari being at all the wiser, it didn't feel good and only made the puppet more sure that he needed to do this. Pulling the books down, he looked them over for a moment before putting up the one that he had already seen, floating quickly back to the living room with the other held firmly in his hands that he pretended didn't have any slight shakes to them.

Pulling the first page over, he felt something tense up in his body, not his music box, that was still locked up, but something else, something deeper, past the metal, porcelain and fabric, as he stared down at the words inscribed on the inside of the first page.

'To the Aftons, remember the good times and all those that were there for them. Let this photo book be a reminder of the hearts of the performance that we live in this life.

-Henry Emily'

It was already feeling like too much, as his eyes shifted to look at the first picture, showing two identical looking babies, one wrapped up in a soft green blanket and the other in a matching blue. He was looking at a picture of baby him... That was him and his sister... Laying together in what looked like an extra large crib.

Turning to the next page before he could think about it, he was blasted by the sight of a whole gaggle of kids, his brain stuttering over them all, even as he recognized three of them from the album Mike had already shown him. The sight of a small Mike with ocean blue eyes, the fiery orange hair already there on a toddler, Mike and Goldie's sister, and Goldie himself, Evan, the youngest among the group, a baby sitting among the rest with a set of wide grey eyes staring up at the camera, the only one seemingly aware of it of the kids in the image.

Then there was the other two. It took him a moment to tell them apart, they looked identical with how young they were, maybe three or four at most. In a set of matching outfits with different colors being the only real thing to be able to tell them apart, as he caught himself staring at the two kids, with those matching bright green eyes...

He knew he had a twin, but he hadn't really realized that meant he looked similar to Charlie. He hadn't really comprehended the fact that he had been human, at least not fully, even in the picture from before, as a newborn, he hadn't quite realized that it was him, the baby in the picture had been sleeping and it was easy to move past compared to now.

His eyes had been green, his hair had been a chestnut brown, his face held soft features, even as a plump toddler, it was clear. The sound of faint static made him aware he had been staring at the picture for far too long as he quickly flipped through a few more, pausing as he found himself again, in the arms of a man that his mind instantly said was his father, as he stared at the man as long as he could before it became to much, flipping to the next page soon after.

Over and over, the Afton's occasionally showing up, but Mike had vastly underestimated just what ratio of Aftons to Emilys this book had. It had been a gift, a strange one, but one Mari couldn't help but treasure, no matter how much it felt like he was drowning in just about every emotion he could think he could feel at once. As he watched the kid that had once been him grow more and more, from a baby to toddler, to kid.

The pictures stopped before he figured the twins had turned to double digits, but it was still something... It was him. It was his family, pictures of his mother that once he saw them it was like the air had been ripped from lungs that he no longer had, as emotions swirled over memories that just begged to be known, and yet they didn't come. He wasn't even sure why, if he was holding them off as a subconscious want to protect himself from anymore or if it was something else, he just knew by the end of it, he tried to think about just what he would have looked like.

Staring away from the pictures of the book, where a small boy for his age stood proudly holding out a frankly horrible drawing with another boy with silver eyes next to him, looking awkward but still smiling as well, to his hands now. No longer warm toned of normal skin, but the felt inky black, not five fingers but three strange elongated ones. Wrists that were normal, now holding metal wires spooled up and ready to be released to be attached to a cross on a pair of thin long limbs, attached to a body that didn't even have feet.

He never really minded becoming what he was now. He had cared so much more about what he had to do to help than what he was, he got to live after his death, and he didn't want to think poorly about it now, but he couldn't help but wonder what his hands would have looked like if they had never looked like this.

Maybe this had been a mistake after all... But Mari refused to regret it, he had to deal with this now, no matter how confused he felt about it and just what he should feel or do.

Fun chapter, I really want to have something deep to say about it, but really, gotta be honest, I'm writing this at way too late at night/early in the morning the day of posting cause I put these end notes off for a bit to long, and I can't think well at the moment to be able to put something actually deep and meaningful here, cause, well, I am very tired. Chronic insomnia be like that I suppose, been worse than usual lately but that's whatever, it'll pass around the same time I pass out.

I guess I can talk about the puppet panic, that was fun, Mari doesn't really know what he wants to do and is just struggling trying to figure it out for himself, unsure and uncertain as he's trying to grasp what it means to have a new normal that he needs to strive for while working out who he is at the same time. He's finally going through his well deserved animatronic identity crisis, isn't that nice?

There was a small in between break just to show what was happening at the Cove, and as well Goldie just being his best blunt self. Jeremy's really trying though, which good on him as well... Uh, what else...? Mike and Mari ignoring problems by smashing faces together was honestly really funny to me, I don't focus on that kind of physicalness when it comes to their relationship, but it's interesting that I've kind of leaned into it in the way that I have, with that being the two using it almost as a form of distraction in the face of stress instead of most couples who just really like smooching. There's probably something to say about that, something I've even actually thought out, but I'm currently not in the cognizant head space well enough to discuss behavioral psychology and unconventional co-dependent based coping mechanism at the moment. So, I'mma end it off here, See ya!