As with many viewers, I was saddened by the ending of Liv and Rafael's most recent encounter, so I've decided to write them the ending I think they deserve :)

The title is a quote from Shakespeare's Sonnet 116 (my favourite). The characters belong to Dick Wolf, and the first few paragraphs contain direct quotes from the final of s23 (credit to L&O SVU).

Any constructive feedback is greatly appreciated :)

Frustration bordering on anger filled him as he processed Liv's words, her defence of Stabler being the final straw. It was clear that they had reached an impasse. He had hoped her acceptance of his invitation meant that they could part as friends, not enemies. But it was clear she had decided his actions were unforgiveable: he had tried to help her, Stabler had tried to help himself. And yet he was the villain. Again.

"When you're ready to stop feeling betrayed by me, I'll be here" Barba retorted, frustration and resignation present in his voice. Liv felt something inside her tighten involuntarily at the coldness of his tone, and she watched wordlessly as he placed money on the bar, draped his suit jacket over his arm and walked past her without a goodbye.

"Rafa" she said quietly, her words falling involuntarily from her lips. He heard them, and was instantly recalled.

"What?" he sighed, his voice colder than he had intended, as he fixed his eyes firmly upon the ground.

"I miss you too" she said sadly, her throat tightening at the admission. Despite her anger at his actions and his refusal to accept her hurt, she found herself craving his company. And if she couldn't have it, she needed to ensure she knew it was wanted.

Rafael Barba stood silently for a few moments as he processed her words, ignoring the tightness in his chest as he suppressed half a dozen responses, each as pathetic as the last. He was exhausted by their circular argument, devastated by her defence of Stabler and condemnation of him, and heartbroken that they appeared to have reached a stalemate. He was drawn from this thoughts by the sensation of tears burning in his eyes. He swallowed thickly and walked straight out of the bar.

Liv sat motionless on the barstool, listening to the familiar sound of his footsteps as they moved further away, before disappearing completely. She was waiting for him to stop, turn around and come back, but he didn't. Something deep inside her ached when she heard the door open and close behind him, with an almost cruel air of finality.

She tried to ignore the feeling of overwhelming sadness and grief which threatened to consume her, which she tried to suppress with a glass of scotch. Although she was furious with him, she missed him terribly. He was her confidante and friend, and there had been a time she had thought – hoped, even – that it might be more. There would be times where they would sit together in his office, her apartment, or this very bar, talking for hours and putting the world to rights. He was a wonderful listener, an excellent advisor and a true friend. And now they couldn't even have one drink together in their favourite bar without arguing. Despite blaming him entirely, she was surprised by the guilt she was currently experiencing, a deep sense of unease in the pit of her stomach that even the alcohol would not numb. Whilst she was convinced he had been out of line, and was wrong to have acted as he did, she did not doubt his intentions were noble. And that mattered to her, greatly. She tapped her fingers impatiently on the glass and sighed in resignation as she made her decision. Irrespective of fault and blame, she did not want their reunion to end like this. And so she swallowed the last of her scotch, and all of her pride, paid her tab and walked briskly out of the bar.

The cold New York City air hit her as she stepped outside, the cool April afternoon transforming into a bitterly cold evening. She drew her blazer around her body as she approached the edge of the sidewalk and hailed a cab, giving the address to the driver and easing herself into the welcoming warmth of the backseat.

Olivia spent the entire ten minute journey trying to ignore the nervousness which was pooling in her abdomen, distracting herself by rehearsing her words again and again in her head. She considered his replies and drafted responses for them all, filing them away neatly in her mind. She had been so distracted by her efforts that the cabbie had to prompt her twice when the vehicle had stopped.

"We're here, lady. That'll be Twenty-five bucks" he said, annoyance present in his tone. Liv handed him thirty dollars, thanked him quietly and exited the cab.

She closed the door firmly behind her and walked briskly across the sidewalk, up the stone steps and into the hotel. Approaching the front desk with confidence, she forced a smile towards the young blonde woman typing lazily at the computer.

"Good evening" Liv smiled pleasantly, as the younger woman blinked wearily and looked up at her. "I'm here to see a friend, but I forgot his room number, could you help me out?" she asked gently. The younger woman shrugged her shoulders almost imperceptibly.

"Sure. Name?" she responded, turning her eyes back towards the computer.

"Rafael Barba" Liv replied, listening the tap of keys as she checked the clock on the wall. It was almost ten, but Rafael was a night owl. And she doubted he'd be able to relax now any more than she could.

"Room 307" replied the receptionist, not even looking up from her computer. Liv nodded.

"Thank you" she smiled politely, removing her phone from her pocket and checking her emails as she approached the elevator and stepped inside, scarcely looking up from her phone as she pressed the number three.

As the elevator ascended, Liv found herself feeling a mixture of anxiety and excitement, a dizzying cocktail of emotions she had experienced during many of the late night chats she had with Rafael Barba. She enjoyed his company greatly. He was kind, attentive, intelligent and entertaining; a deep-thinker and honourable man whose opinion she valued and company she had once enjoyed so greatly. There has been times where their relationship had strayed into a cautious flirtation, hinting at romance, but despite several incidents it had never developed further. Despite yearning for a return to those times, she could not ignore the fact she was furious with him. She agreed that they certainly were going round in circles, but it did not have to be that way forever. And after the losses she had experienced over the past few years, she was determined not to allow someone who had once been a close friend to become one of them.

The elevator door opened and Liv felt herself falter. She hesitated for a moment, before taking a deep breath and stepping out of the elevator, locating the room in question almost immediately. Her feet carried her towards it and she knocked upon it three times, the sound drawing her from her reverie.

The door opened slowly and she found herself staring at Rafael Barba, who stood before her with a glass of scotch in his hand and a confused look upon his face. His eyes widened slightly and he blinked, confusion etched across his features.

"Liv" he said cautiously, glancing across the corridor as if expecting others to be with her. "Is everything alright?"

"No" she responded honestly. "But I want it to be" she added quietly. "And I suspect you do too". Barba nodded slowly, before turning to the side.

"Please, come in" he said softly. Liv nodded and walked into the room.

And the moment she did, all of her carefully rehearsed words and arguments escaped her, and the familiar sensation of anxiety and anticipation flooded her.

"Can I get you something to drink?" asked Rafael, ever the gentleman. Liv turned around and found herself standing just feet from him, the scent of his cologne dizzying her. She let out a shaken breath.

"No, thank you" she replied, offering him a small smile. "I'm sorry, I know it's late" she offered humbly. "But I didn't want us to leave like this. Again" she explained. Rafael nodded.

"Neither do I" he agreed, placing one hand in his pocket as he watched her with earnest caution. Liv swallowed hard.

"Before you left New York you told me I had opened your heart" Liv said with a soft smile, her eyes glistening as she spoke. Rafael nodded in agreement. "But you shattered mine" she whispered her voice breaking as she spoke, despite herself. "Twice" she breathed.

Rafael watched as Liv's eyes became glassy, and he stepped closer to her, placing his glass on the table as he closed the distance between them.

"I am sorry if my actions hurt you" he responded gently, his voice soft and his eyes kind. "That was not my intention" he assured her. She nodded in understanding.

"I understand why you did what you did" she said softly, her eyes meeting Rafael's as she spoke. "And I know you did it for the right reasons" she conceded. "But sometimes you can do something with the best of intentions and still hurt the person they are trying to protect" she explained. Rafael lowered his gaze slightly before nodded in understanding.

"My only intention was to protect you" he said quietly. "I knew you'd be angry if I represented Wheatley, but I would rather you be angry and safe than grateful and compromised" he explained. Liv closed her eyes and let out a slow breath, turning her head away from him as he spoke. "Because when you love someone unconditionally you want them to be happy" he smiled. "Even if that means that you're not."

Liv turned back towards him, swallowing thickly as her eyes shone with tears. The only anger that remained within her was with herself, for her weakness in this moment. She felt the warmth of his hand upon her arm and she leaned into his touch.

"I never asked you to" Liv said quietly, her voice sad and unaccusing, her gaze not leaving his. Rafael smiled softly.

"You didn't have to" he replied simply. "You mean the world to me, Liv" he said quietly. "And I know that my feelings are not reciprocated, and I respect that completely" he assured her. "This was never about Stabler" he assured her, relieved that she didn't react furiously when he spoke his name. "It was always about you" he whispered.

Liv felt her breathing become deeper and her heart start to race, as she placed her hand on Rafael's arm, prompting him to pull her gently closer.

"Rafa" Liv said breathlessly, as she closed the distance between them and pressed her lips to his.

Despite being surprised by the kiss, Rafael responded immediately, his hands finding her hips and pulling her gently against him. A hum of satisfaction rose in Liv's throat as she deepened the kiss, pressing her body against his, losing herself completely in his intoxicating scent and the safety of his arms.

After a couple of minutes Liv broke the kiss breathlessly, her cheeks flushed and her eyes dark, as Rafael exhaled sharply and placed a gentle hand upon her cheek. She placed her hand over his and laced their fingers together, holding his hand in her own and stepped away from him reluctantly, encouraging him to walk backwards towards the bed.

Rafael allowed himself to be guided by her, his lips capturing hers in passionate kiss which caused warmth to pool in the depths of her belly, and spread across her body like wildfire. The kiss deepened as their hands, which had been hesitant, became as hungry as their lips, exploring each other's bodies as they each became breathless and lost.

Liv undid the buttons on Rafael's waistcoat and he assisted her in removing it, the garment barely reaching the floor before she pushed down his suspenders and made quick work of his tie, followed by her own blazer. Rafael felt Liv's fingers undoing the buttons of his shirt as she encouraged him back onto the bed.

"Liv" Rafael said breathlessly, breaking their kiss with great reluctance as he stilled her hands. She looked up at him with dark eyes. "Are you sure?" he asked quietly, uncertainly present in his tone. Liv nodded immediately in response, undoing the final buttons on his shirt before moving her hands towards her zipper, which she undid quickly, stepping out of her trousers. There were very few coherent thoughts she was able to form at present, but there was no question in her mind that this is what they both wanted. And, she suspected, needed.

"I'm sure" she breathed, pushing him back onto the bed, where he fell compliantly.

An hour later they both collapsed into each other's arms, spent and exhausted, their bodies alight. Rafael used the little energy he had left to push himself off of Liv, not wishing to hurt her, but she responded by pulling him back towards her. He smiled against her lips and kissed her softly, before rolling onto his side and holding her close. He stroked her hair from her face and kissed her forehead, drawing the sheets around her to keep her warm, as she felt into an almost instant and dreamless sleep, which Rafael swiftly joined her in.

As Liv's mind and body rested, she was blissfully unaware of the changes which were taking place in her body, and the very permanent reminder of the night they shared which was forming within her.