CHAPTER NINE

"Sakura!"

"Huh?... What?" Sakura jumped in her seat, focusing her attention back on her friend, who was watching her with clear exasperation.

"You didn't hear a word I just said, did you?" Temari let out a quiet sigh. "Okay, that's it. What's wrong? You've been off for the past few days. Are you still mad at me—"

"Temari—"

"—for leaving you at the party?" Temari continued.

"What? No! Of course not… I'm just…stressed" Sakura took a sip from the cup she had barely touched, the liquid in it now cold.

"Is this about Gaara?"

Sakura choked on the coffee she had just ingested, her eyes widening. "Wha... what?" She coughed. "Why w-would you even t-think that?" She sputtered.

"Why would you think that?" She repeated more clearly.

"Damn, it's nothing to fuss about," Temari said, handing Sakura a glass of water, which she gratefully took. "If he's stressing you out that much at the hospital, you know you can just talk to him, right? He gave me so much shit for leaving you at the party that day… how crazy is that…" she muttered the last part more to herself.

Sakura let out a sigh of relief. Temari clearly didn't know the reason for her anxiety. She deeply wished she could confide in her, but how could she? This was her brother, for god's sake. It's not like she could just go—

"Hey, Temari, so I sucked face with your brother on his bed, any thoughts?"

She needed to talk to someone. She missed Ino terribly. Despite being a big-mouthed gossip, they told each other everything, and Ino was experienced with guys while Sakura was the opposite despite getting a lot of attention from men. Ino would have told her what to do. Regardless, she needed to get hold of her emotions and start acting like herself again, but this was all his fault. If he hadn't done what he did, she wouldn't be so agitated and confused right now. None of that was supposed to happen. She still couldn't believe it did—it felt like some kind of fever dream.

"The good kind" Inner interjected.

Temari's soft voice pulled Sakura out of her reverie. "My brother… he really respects you, you know, even though he may come off as mean sometimes."

"You think ?" Sakura replied, doubtful. Honestly, the only person she thought Gaara actually respected was Naruto.

"I know so."

Temari wasn't stupid. She knew something must have happened between Sakura and Gaara even though she couldn't quite classify it, but Sakura wasn't very good at hiding her emotions. She'd get all jumpy at the mention of Gaara's name, which didn't happen before, and she tried to avoid him at any cost. Gaara, on the other hand, was an expert at hiding his emotions, making it harder to read him. Her interest was piqued, and she was determined to find out what was going on.

They chatted a bit more, mostly about Temari's love life and Sakura didn't mind at all; she liked that Temari could confide in her about her personal life. She felt bad, wishing she could do the same. Maybe she should. After all, what's there to hide? So Gaara kissed her. Not a big deal. He's probably kissed a lot of girls, even more experienced than her. That thought didn't make her feel any better.

"More like a steamy make-out session," her inner voice retorted.

Sakura picked up her glass of water and took a huge gulp. She was going to do it.

"Listen, uhmm, Temari…" she started to say.

Just then, Sakura's personal alarm went off, indicating that lunchtime was over. Whatever she had wanted to say was forgotten. The moment was gone. She was sure another suitable time to tell her would come.

In the back of her head, she could hear her inner voice mumbling, "Excuses… excuses."

Sakura stretched as she stood up. Temari followed suit, and they walked out of the restaurant together to the outdoor seating area.

"You wanted to tell me something?" Temari asked, watching Sakura.

Sakura smiled softly, shaking her head. "It's nothing. Thanks for lunch."

"Whatever. You're paying next time," Temari deadpanned before walking off to the right. Sakura giggled after her, shaking her head as she herself took her left towards the direction of the hospital to continue the second half of her class.

Sakura watched with a smile on her face as the last of the students filtered out of the class. She was pleased with the progress that was being made so far; the students were learning very fast, and in no time, Suna would have a good number of formidable medic-nins.

The class was empty now, so she packed up her books and made to leave. It was just past 6 PM, so she figured she'd stay back at the hospital and help out a bit before going home. The hospital was getting a lot busier, especially at night. Of course, she was only staying back to help the staff, not because she was avoiding a certain someone. With that thought, she left the classroom, walking briskly to her office.

Dropping the books on her table, she sank into her office chair. Her eyes glanced at the huge file on her desk, so she picked it up and tried to read it, but it was of no use. Her mind was clouded with thoughts of Gaara—his perfect face and perfect body. It just kept getting worse as the days passed. You would think it would be the opposite. She groaned deeply as the memory resurfaced again.

Gaara holding her face in place, locking her in with those cold blue-green eyes, telling her how much he wanted her. The pounding of her heart, all rational thought leaving her as he kissed her. The kiss had been demanding, sensual, as if trying to memorize the feel of her. The uncontrollable desire and heat that pooled at the pit of her stomach as she kissed him back, yes, she had kissed him back with as much fervour. The feel of his hair as she ran her hands through it—she hadn't expected it to be so soft. Somehow, she ended up under him, his hands under her shirt. She could still feel the ghost of his lips where he trailed heated kisses down her neck. She would have had to answer some embarrassing questions if she hadn't figured out the hickeys early on and healed them. She only came to her senses when she felt his hands cup her bare breast. She pushed him away so fast and practically fled with what dignity she had left.

Sakura had returned to Gaara's room when she was sure he wasn't around, leaving some pills and notes on how to take them. The medic in her wouldn't quit; she had to stop herself countless times from checking on him to ensure he was taking his meds properly and if they were working. Yes, it was the medic in her and not for any other reason.

She realized she was absentmindedly tracing her lips with her fingers and stopped the act instantly, a blush creeping up her cheeks. Sakura sighed deeply. Maybe she shouldn't have avoided him the way she did. He was clearly not in his right senses; she was positive it was some sort of side effect of the treatment. That explained his behaviour, but how could she explain hers? She had kissed him back, and she had been very willing. "Do you want me as much as I want you?" His words replayed in her head over and over since that day.

Did he really want her? No, no, no, don't start. She couldn't allow herself to hope again, to get hurt once more. She managed to convince herself it was just something he said without realizing, just a fluke. Maybe he didn't even remember. After all, he hadn't tried to contact her since then. Perhaps she misheard him. It was just like her to cling to a flimsy rope of hope and then get hurt when it inevitably snapped.

Ultimately, she decided she would stop avoiding Gaara like a coward. She was anything but that. If she saw him, she would act normal, as if nothing had happened. He was the Kazekage, and she was just the volunteer medic.

With that resolution, she pushed thoughts of him out of her mind and tried to focus on her task. She groaned at the bulky file on her table. She was supposed to have finished reading the files and reported back to Keita a long time ago. It seemed to be a record of patients admitted to the hospital in the past month, detailing their visits and treatments. She didn't know what was special about the files, but Keita wouldn't have asked her to review them if he didn't expect her to find something. She opened the file and started to go through it, determined to lose herself in work and forget about Gaara, if only for a little while.

Sakura burst through the door without knocking, startling a busy Keita. Papers scattered from his desk as he jolted upright.

"Kami, Sakura! Do you know what time it is? You nearly gave me a heart attack," he joked, but Sakura didn't laugh or retort with her usual humour. Instead, she threw the bulky file onto his desk with a loud thud.

"Keita, what does this mean?"

Keita heaved a sigh. "You should probably sit down for this."

Sakura took the seat opposite him, her eyes never leaving his as he began to explain in detail what she had just discovered. As he spoke, her shock deepened, her mind racing through the implications.

When he finished, Sakura sat, shell-shocked. This was bad, really bad, especially if it was what she suspected. Keita waited for the news to sink in before continuing.

"My hypothesis is some kind of drug—"

"Or a virus," she countered, her voice tight with anxiety.

"Now, now, let's not jump to conclusions," he said, glancing around the room as if someone might overhear, though they were alone.

"You're not even sure it's a drug, and I'm the one making assumptions?" she snapped in a hushed tone. His calm demeanor irritated her, it reminded her of Shikamaru's nonchalance, and she had to fight the urge to punch him.

Ignoring her outburst, he continued, "There have been three cases so far, at least since the month I started working here. The good news is, whatever it is, it's not spreading fast. The bad news is we can't pinpoint when it started."

"Why is that?" she asked, trying to reign in her frustration.

"Well, it sucks, but the Suna hospital didn't keep medical records until you came. The file I gave you is one I compiled myself or tried to since I was appointed here, so it only covers a month and a few weeks. That's not enough data to know for sure when it started."

He let out a yawn, rubbing circles on his temples. She could see now how tired he was—the lines on his face had deepened and dark circles shadowed his eyes. He looked like he hadn't rested in days. She had been so wrapped up in her own issues that she hadn't noticed how stressed he was. She felt like a terrible friend.

Sakura deflated into her chair, her expression softening with concern. "Why didn't you say anything all this while? Gaara doesn't know, does he?" Poor Keita had been carrying this secret alone, masking his stress with humour.

He sighed, looking more worn out than she had ever seen him. "No, he doesn't. I wasn't sure at first. The cases happened so far apart… it could just be a coincidence, right?"

But they both knew this was far from a coincidence. That's why he had given her the file without explaining, hoping she wouldn't see the pattern either. He rubbed his temples again, trying to soothe his migraine.

"Let me help with that," she said softly.

She urged him to come closer, placing her hands on both sides of his head. She began to push her soothing chakra into his head, and Keita sighed as the tension melted away, his headache easing.

He breathed out in relief. "I really needed that. Thank you, Sakura-chan." He flashed a toothy grin at her.

It was the least she could do for being such a shitty friend.

"You should go home and get some rest. I'll finish up here," she told him.

He refused at first, but after more persistent persuasion from Sakura, he finally relented and went home.

Apparently, in the first case, the woman had stabbed her husband in the shoulder with a kitchen knife, claiming he was going to kill her first. The second case was eerily similar: the woman believed her 13-year-old child was evil and tried to "purify" him, only for the father to intervene just in time. The third woman's case was less violent, but still a case of psychosis and still concerning. Sakura couldn't help but wonder if there was a reason, were there characteristics these women shared that made them susceptible to whatever got to them, drugs or viruses. She had stayed behind, helping the nurses and attending to the last of the patients, but her mind kept replaying the conversation with Keita.

All three cases involved women, with confirmed symptoms including fever, paranoia, insomnia, and violent episodes leading to the endangerment of their loved ones or themselves. In the worst cases, it led to death.

The reaction was most severe in the first two women. She needed to run some tests quickly, but unfortunately, according to Keita, the first two women were dead, and the third was admitted to the Suna Mental Health Facility.

She wished it were just a coincidence, but three women with similar symptoms in a month? No way. Gaara would not be pleased when he heard about this. If they were lucky, it might be a drug being circulated. Heaven forbid it be some type of virus.

Sakura checked the time and saw it was already 1 AM. She hurriedly packed up her stuff and left for home, but not before giving directives to the medics on the overnight shift and bidding them goodnight. Tomorrow was going to be a long day, and she needed her rest.

Sakura woke up the next day with only one thing on her mind, to find answers. She needed to do some research. Maybe she'd find some in Grandma Chiyo's books on herbs and poisons, which could be in the library. Important books like that wouldn't be in the public library, so the plan was to head to the hospital as usual, give her lessons, and then return home to the private library to go through Grandma Chiyo's books. She also needed to talk to Keita. There was something crucial that needed to be done.

"We need to tell Gaara."

Keita let out a deep sigh from across Sakura's office, where he was leaning against the wall with his arms folded.

"We need to before it happens again… if it happens again."

"I understand," he said, smiling ruefully. "He's gonna be enraged."

"Yeah, he is. But this isn't your fault, Keita. If you hadn't kept your own records, Kami knows we'd never have found out until it was too late. You did well, okay?"

Keita nodded, he knew he hadn't done anything wrong, he had made the most sensible decision in a delicate situation. Still, he didn't have the energy to deal with Gaara's anger.

"Now we just have to nip this in the bud before it spreads. I'm going to do some research at the library to see if I can find anything. We should have a meeting with Gaara tomorrow." Keita watched as she chewed her lips in thought.

"You already arranged for the meeting?" He was amazed at how calmly she was handling this. Last night, she seemed on the verge of combusting, and now she was calmly strategizing. It was fascinating; he could see why Gaara was attracted to her.

"Yeah, I sent a letter to Matsuri to schedule us in for tomorrow. No doubt his schedule will be packed today."

When did she even have time to write and send a letter? He wondered.

"Keita, I think you should speak to some of the older nurses here, the ones that were here before you came," she suggested.

"Good idea, Sakura. We'll see if they remember patients with any of those symptoms."

"It would also be useful if we could get our hands on the Suna Mental Health Facility records, but that may be impossible, so let's start with the nurses," Sakura added, considering that there might be other victims who didn't die but were instead admitted to the facility.

"Nothing is impossible, Sakura," Keita replied with a determined glint in his eyes.

"Keita," Sakura warned, her tone firm, "don't do anything stupid. Be discreet about it, okay? We don't want people panicking and spreading rumours"

"Yes, ma'am." Keita joked with a small salute, trying to lighten the mood.

Sakura shook her head at him with a smile. "I should get to my classes. I hope we'll be able to find something today."

"Yeah, same here," Keita murmured,

Sakura dragged her feet along the floor as she walked, exhausted from the day's classes. She had returned home as planned, knowing she needed a fresh bath and some food to prep her for a long evening of research in the library. Thankfully, the housekeeper had prepared something she liked, providing a small comfort in her stressful day.

After her bath, Sakura tied her hair in a messy bun and dressed in a green t-shirt and cotton white shorts. Refreshed and energized, she felt ready to tackle her goals. With high spirits, she marched toward the library, hoping Grandma Chiyo's books might hold the answers she needed.

As Sakura approached the huge double doors of the library, a wave of unease washed over her. She knew exactly why—this library was the catalyst for everything that had happened that day. If she hadn't gone to snoop around, she wouldn't have run into Gaara or ended up kissing him on his bed. Everything always seemed to circle back to that burning question she'd been avoiding since: Did she regret it? If she could take back that day, would she?

She shook her head violently, trying to dispel the intrusive thoughts. Now was not the time for that. Pushing open the doors, she stepped into the library, marveling at its size. It was almost too big for a private library, making her wonder just how enormous the public library must be.

"Now, where would a book as important as that be kept?" she mused, scanning the shelves and towering stacks.

After nearly an hour of fruitless searching, Sakura was ready to abandon her self-imposed mission. She could just ask Gaara, but that would mean talking to him face to face, alone, and she was far from ready for that. She had put on a strong front for Keita, but the thought of facing Gaara tomorrow filled her with dread. The only thing keeping her from running away from the whole situation was the knowledge that this needed to be done, and the comforting thought that she wouldn't be alone with Gaara in his office.

Sakura huffed in annoyance, having combed through about fifteen shelves to no avail. It was ridiculous at this point—how hard could it be to find some freaking books? Just as she was about to enter the next section of shelves, she felt it, a familiar chakra presence. "No, no, no," she thought, panicking. She wasn't ready. Her luck recently was just abysmal.

Even before she turned, she knew it was him. Seeing Gaara didn't make her swoon any less; he was just so astronomically handsome. It was the strangest thing—she wanted to hide under a rock, and at the same time, she wanted to kiss him. Wait, what?

They stood there, staring at each other for a moment before he finally spoke.

"What are you searching for?" he asked, his voice quiet and deep.

Sakura wondered how long he'd been in the library to know she was searching for something and why she hadn't noticed his presence. She wasn't a sensory ninja by any means, but this was absurd. Realizing he was waiting for her to answer, she replied.

"A book."

"What book?" he asked, stalking closer. Sakura resisted the urge to take a step back.

She could lie, but something inside her advised against it.

"Grandma Chiyo's books."

He didn't reply, which troubled her. She had been positive he would ask why she needed them, but he remained silent. Maybe he was respecting her privacy; Gaara had always been a stickler for manners. He was now within arm's reach. Her heart rate increased as her eyes finally met his. She tried to gauge his countenance, but he seemed as relaxed as ever, his face betraying no emotion.

She really wished she was a mind reader; she wanted to know what was going on in his head, what he was thinking. Gaara stood in silence, watching her with curiosity. Did he even remember anything? It didn't seem like he did. Sakura was relieved that the event that had been bothering her for weeks might be forgotten, right?

So why didn't she feel relieved? Why did the thought of Gaara not remembering their little tryst leave her with a feeling of despondency? Sakura was left confused by these questions running through her head.

"So, uhmm, what are you doing here?" she asked, trying to make small talk to distract herself and maybe Gaara. She was genuinely curious as to why he wasn't in his office though—it was highly unusual.

"Looking for something."

Or someone.

She wondered what he was looking for...

"Are you still having trouble sleeping?" she asked, her eyebrows etched with worry.

"Not as much… thank you," he muttered, his eyes still trained on her. She swallowed when he moved to stand directly in front of her. This time, she took a step back before she could stop herself, her back hitting the bookshelf behind her. But then he surprised her by closing the gap she had created. They were standing so close now she could feel his body heat. Her heart was thudding wildly in her chest. Oh kami, what was he doing, and why was she still standing there? But her feet wouldn't budge, and her hands wouldn't move to push him away. She let out a quiet gasp and shut her eyes when he dipped his head.

She waited one second, two seconds, and when she didn't feel anything, she opened her eyes to see him looking over her shoulder, slightly crouched. He pulled out a book from the shelf behind her.

"I believe this is the book you're searching for," his breath tickled her ear as he spoke.

Sakura cleared her throat in a bid to recover from her embarrassment. Of course, he wasn't trying to kiss her. She chided herself internally. It's not like he remembered or anything, so why would he? She could feel that cloud of glum washing over her again but shook it off. It was better this way. She looked up to see the book he was holding out to her.

"Yes, haha, it's been in my face this whole time and I didn't see it." She took the book from him, holding it to her chest. It was quite bigger than she thought it would be—like, really big.

"Everything was compiled into this big book," Gaara said as if reading her thoughts.

"Ohh," she replied, smiling sheepishly and looking everywhere but at him. He was still standing so close, and she didn't know what to do.

Promptly, he pulled away, stepping back a pace. Sakura hated that she instantly missed the warmth from him.

"I should head back," he said.

Sakura nodded. "And I'll stay here going through this big book." After a moment of silence, she continued, "So, I guess I'll, um, see you later?" She muttered quickly, not waiting for a reply as she turned to leave.

"Sakura."

"Yes ?". She stopped in her tracks.

He leaned down behind her, his lips brushing her ear, and she hoped he didn't notice her shudder. Her eyes widened when she heard the words he whispered.

"You smell really good."

She turned immediately, but the room was already empty. However, the words echoed in her eardrums repeatedly.

It took a moment before Sakura realized.

"He did remember" she gasped.