— JENNIE

..

I remove the books from of the last box and place them on the bookshelf. There's something about emptying the last box that's relieving. Looking around, I inspect my new place and smile. It's definitely different than my bedroom, but now that I'm sharing a space with Rosé we had to compromise on décor.

I hear a knock at the door and rush over to open it. My father steps in with a large box in his hand. "I was just thinking how great it felt to empty the last box. Thanks, Dad," I joke. He leans in, pressing his lips against my forehead.

"Well, I thought you'd like to have some of Jisoo's things," he says, dropping the box on top of the dining table.

I walk over and search through, smiling at the filled picture frames, a few of her favorite books, and a few other favorite things of hers. "Thank you, Daddy." I hug him.

He nods.

"Would you like anything?" I ask, walking into the open kitchen.

He scoots onto a stool by the island. "I'll have coffee."

While the coffee is brewing, I turn and face him. My handsome father looks run-down. "Have you heard from Mom?" I ask him.

He shakes his head. "No. Like I said to you, I know it's difficult for your mother to handle this separation, but until she gets professional help, I can't continue going on with her like this."

I nod in understanding. "Do you know if she is?"

"I've spoken with Dr. Rosario. She won't give me specifics, but she has mentioned she's been in the office. I'm just hoping it works out for her." He pauses. "Jennie, I do love your mother. We have a history of twenty-eight years and I can't erase that, even if I tried. But the way she treated you was uncalled for, and I couldn't stand by and let her think it was acceptable."

I know this has been as hard on him as it has been on me. I haven't spoken to my mother in over eight months. I'd be lying if I said she hasn't crossed my mind because she has. I wonder if she's getting the help she needs, or if she even thinks of me, but I don't dwell on it for too long. I've learned not to focus on the things I can't control. Instead I focus on waking up each morning and continuing to push throughout the day. "Thank you," I say, then slide a filled mug his way.

Rosé walks in just on time. "Hey, Mr. Kimmy."

"Rosé." My father smiles.

"Guess who I just ran into at the market?" she says, placing the groceries on the counter.

"Who?" I ask.

"Mingyu." My body stills at hearing his name. It's the closest I've gotten to Lisa in a long time. And since JK and Rosé haven't been a thing for a while, I haven't heard anything about any of the guys. "He is getting hotter, by the way, and guess what? He finally dumped Blair. For good this time! Thank God."

"How is he?" I ask, slowly scooting onto a stool. What I really want to ask is How is Lisa doing?

"He's okay. His father is ill."

"George?" I breathe out in disbelief.

She nods, digging into the bags and removing a carton of milk. "Yeah. Poor guy. Cancer. They found out last month, and he's going through chemo. Mingyu has been handling the business on his own. Since Lisa left he's been so busy."

"Left? What do you mean Lisa left?"

"I think I'm going to go now." My father stands, heads my way, and leaves a kiss on my cheek. "Enjoy your new apartment, baby."

"Thank you, Dad." He waves bye to Rosé and leaves. I focus back on Rosé. "Lisa left?"

She stops, her hands resting over the counter, and then she looks at me. "Yes. Lisa quit months ago. She said she needed a new start. She moved to the Poconos and has been staying at the lake house. She began working on small projects around there."

I swallow hard. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you were finally getting yourself together. And she thought it was best."

I shake my head. "She? The two of you have been talking?"

"Not much, just through text. She only texts me to check in on you. I didn't even know about her uncle until today."

"How could you keep that from me, Rosé?" I stand, pacing in the kitchen as I reach for the locket secured around my neck.

"Like I said, she wanted to keep it that way."

Wetting my lips, I stop my pacing. "Does she not want to see me?"

"Jennie, she loves you. She always has. She asked me to respect her wishes and not mention her to you. I thought it was ridiculous and that the two of you need each other, but she made me promise."

I rush to the closet, grab my jacket, and snatch my keys from the counter.

"Where are you going?" Rosé shouts out.

"To the lake house."

..

After the longest two and a half hour drive of my life, I finally reach the lake house. I stop and admire it for a moment. It looks different. Quiet. There's no music or people partying or Ping-Pong games set up. It's simply peaceful and beautiful.

Instead of using the front entrance, I walk around the back. My heart skips a beat when I see Lisa's truck. She's here. I find the courage to climb the stairs of the deck and gently knock on the door.

Nothing.

My knuckles scrape against the door as I knock louder this time. Still there's no answer.

Air leaves my lungs in frustration. I've come too far to just walk away. Turning, I head for the swing bench by the large tree, thinking I could wait there for her. That's when I see her. She's on the dock by the lake. I take in a lungful of air, hoping it will give me the confidence to face her.

I slowly travel down the long path that leads to the dock. My legs tremble as I continue down the wooden boards. Her back is facing me. She's standing by the edge, looking over the lake, her hands shoved in the front pockets of her shorts. A white T-shirt hugs her figure, exposing her broad shoulders, and she's wearing the Phillies cap.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" I say as I get closer.

Her body stiffens; slowly, she tilts her head and looks over her shoulder. I freeze in place and take this second to appreciate the sight of her. She looks down and then turns around so she's facing me.

I take a few steps forward until we're arm's length away from one another. "Hey," I say, my eyes glued to hers.

"Hey," she says back, swallowing.

We both stand here for a long time, trying to figure out if this is real. Both our chests and shoulders move rapidly with our breathing.

"You look really good," she finally says.

"So do you," I say quietly.

Her brows furrow. "How did you get here?" she asks.

"I drove."

Her face lights up. "You're finally driving, huh?"

I let out a nervous chuckle. "No. Actually I took a taxi."

She laughs, which makes me smile. For a moment everything is back to normal until she bows her head, breaking our connection.

"I heard about your uncle. I'm sorry."

She looks up. "Thanks. He's strong. He's going to beat this."

I nod. "I know he will."

Another round of silence. Then her gaze drops to my neckline. "I see you got the necklace."

I lift my hand and touch it. "Yeah. I love it. Thank you. This necklace and your letter got me through a lot during my recovery."

Her lips slant, eyes tearing up a bit. "I'm glad to hear that. I meant everything in that letter."

"I know." I break out into tears. Then laugh. "I'm sorry. God, I didn't want to cry." I wipe my eyes.

Lisa closes the three steps between us, and before I know it, her hands are on my face, wiping my tears away. "So, what's new with you?" she asks, her eyes tracing my features.

"I'm painting again," I admit, blinking away my tears so I can see her.

A smile tugs at the corner of her lips. "I'm glad to hear that."

I nod. "And I applied to school. I'll be starting in the fall, and over the summer I'll be teaching art at a day camp."

Her face shows so much pride. "That's good. Real good."

I moisten my lips. "You? What have you been up to?" I manage to ask.

"You know." she shrugs. "A little of this, a little of that. And missing you." Her smile fades. "I've missed you, Jersey Girl."

"I missed you too," I choke out. "So, so much."

She shuts her eyes.

"Lisa?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you," I say.

"For what?"

"For believing in me. For loving me. For looking past the ugly and finding the beauty hidden beneath. You know, I'm learning a lot, and there are times when it's hard to love myself, but every time I think of you, I always think, if someone else can dig deep and fall in love with even my damaged side, then there is hope for me after all."

Her fingers graze my face. "I didn't have to dig deep to love you, Jersey Girl. Digging takes work. Falling in love with you was the simplest thing I've ever done."

I look up at her; her eyes are filled with sincerity and love. I reach out and frame her face with my hands. I miss this—the way she feels, the way I feel around her. I just miss her. Lisa loves me…for who I am. She's never looked at me any different, she's never judged me, and never ran away when I was at my worst; she's always been here, even when I tried to push her away.

I stand on my tiptoes and touch my lips to hers. For the first time, I don't allow the voices or fear of loving someone to take over. I allow my heart to.

She pulls away, her forehead resting on mine. "Where do we go from here?" she asks.

"Let's just take it one day at a time."

She smiles. "I like that."

I smile too. My gaze looks past her and I take in the scenery.

Have you ever stepped outside and looked around, and even though it's very familiar territory—you've seen it a dozen times before—it instantly looks different? The trees are more vibrant, the view is clearer, the sky is bluer, and everything is just brighter. That's what I feel right now. It's soothing and breathless and beautiful.

I want to keep it like this forever.

"Everything okay?" she asks.

I smile up at her. "Yes, it's just…" I sigh. "Look around you." I breathe out in awe. Lisa lifts her head, her eyes scanning the view that surrounds us. Her wrinkled brow relaxes, as if she knows my thoughts exactly, and she pulls me into her. I nestle my head into the side of her chest and loop my arms around her waist while she snakes her arm over my shoulder. We just stand there, holding one another, and admiring the view.

I know it won't stay this way. I know there will be days when this view is covered with grey and gloomy clouds. I don't know what tomorrow will bring. But for right now, I enjoy this moment. I breathe, I feel free, and I'm thankful that for today…

I am living.

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THE END

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