Ch 141: Ro-Menace
Happy Valentine's Day. I posted this a little late, but it's been uploaded now. And it's not the best Valentine's Day related chapter but it works as one. This is a parody of the episode: Enemy in Law. Hope you enjoy it.
In the city part of Royal Woods, everyone screams and points at a giant Lena robot as it grabs a handful of people in each hand and drops them on the front lawn of the Shroud house. Everyone is running around.
Lena: Oh, good, captive customers. Now that my LenaBot has dropped you into my clutches, you'll be forced to buy my inventions. [everyone stops in their tracks]
Kyle Marshall: What?! You mean you kidnapped us just to sell us your inventions?
Lena: Come on, it's a standard marketing technique. [people leave]
Kyle: You little twerp!
Lena: Hey!
Her sister Alison saw everything outside.
Alison: He's right, ya know.
Lena: Alison?! You think I'm a twerp?
Alison: Well, yes, but I was referring to the kidnapping.
Lena: [frustrated] Oh, is everything I do wrong in your eyes?
Alison: Yes.
Lena: [with fire in her eyes and points at the citizens] I will destroy all of you! Each and every one of-[suddenly her fiery eyes turn heart filled when she sees the young male scientist, David (Lisa's love interest from L is for Love), heading his way to the Loud house for a study buddy session with Lisa] It's that handsome specimen from school. He's an angel; and no wires. I don't even know his name and yet he's stolen my heart.
Alison: [teasingly] Oooooooh, you've fallen in love!
Lena: What? No I haven't. That's preposterous.
Alison: Don't try to deny it. I saw those hearts in your eyes.
Just then, their father is heard from inside the house.
Mr. Shroud: Kids, come inside! Your mother made something special for lunch!
Mrs. Shroud: It's tuna casserole!
The two sisters groaned, not looking forward to having that for lunch. Alison walked back inside while Lena decided to sneak away.
Lena: I think I'm going to skip lunch today. I've found something else on my menu. [she goes after David while in her mech bot]
The young kid scientist walks up to a young man.
David: Excuse me, sir, but which is better? Sodium carbonate or sodium bicarbonate?
Guy: Uhhhhh…
David: Sodium carbonate, of course. Thank you, my good man. [leaves]
Guy: Um, you're welcome? [then he sees the LenaBot approaching and runs away]
David hears the bot coming towards him and turns around. He screams in fear as the Lenabot grabs him.
Lenabot: Roses are red. Violets are blue. World domination has nothing on you. [he screams]
Lena: Hmmm, I guess he's not a poetry fan. [everyone is running around screaming while the robot is using its eye laser to spell out "I You" on the ground, but while destroying some of the town when doing this. David reads it and screams a few times] Poetry, love notes-nothing's working. Maybe something personal. [David is shrieking. The robot walks over to a rock and karate chops a memorial-like statue of David's head and puts him down]
David: [stops screaming] Am I really that good looking?
Lena: Oh, yeah... I am smooth.
The Lenabot marches off.
David: Hey, where are you going? What a mysterious robot. I must know more about her. [David heads off to find the robot, forgetting about his hangout with Lisa]
Soon, David comes across a store where there are big mechs. But none of them look like the Lenabot.
David: Where could that marvelous mech have gone? What if I never see her again? [suddenly he gets a call, it's from Lena who is back at her house]
David: Hello?
Lena: It's your secret admirer.
David: Oh, you're that giant robot?
Lena: [laughing] No. I program the robot.
David: How did you get my number?
Lena: Phone book. Anyway, I bought a gift for you. Do you like ties?
David: How did you know about my admiration for ties? Have you been spying on me? [6 TV screens are set-up to different parts of David's house]
Lena: It was...just a lucky guess. I've admired you from afar for far too long, my angel. We must meet face-to-face.
David: Well, how about the Hall of Science? They have a diner. Tonight at 8:00?
Lena: Sounds wonderful. I'll be the lovely lady wearing a red dress and carnation. Until tonight, my dear.
Cut to the Loud House where Lisa is waiting for her study buddy to arrive, but is now getting impatient.
Lisa: Where in Einstein's name is my study buddy? I better give him a call. [takes out her phone and dials his number]
David: Greetings.
Lisa: David, where are you? Have you forgotten about our study session?
David: Oh, my apologies Lisa. But I had a change of plans. I just met the most fascinating woman. She bought me a new tie.
Lisa: Really? Wait, are you going on a date with this woman?
David: You could say that.
Lisa: Well who is she? What's her name?
David: I don't know. We haven't actually met in person. But we're meeting at the Hall of Science tonight.
Lisa: Wonderful! You have a nice, romantic date. Run along, make yourself good. [she hangs up, and her curiosity is now piqued] Who could my fellow colleague be going out with?
Lincoln: [enters the room] Hey Lis, do you have any experimental bubblegum?
Lisa: Nevermind that. I just found out my friend David is going on a date with some girl and now my curiosity is piqued.
Lincoln: Ooh. David's got himself a lady?
Lisa: They're meeting at the Hall of Science and I thought I'd go over there and witness this for myself.
Lincoln: I know it's not really my business, but count me in.
Later at night, Lena is wearing a dress with a rose in it while walking into the Hall of Science where there's a diner. She goes up to a waiter.
Lena: [clears throat] I've made reservations for two, tonight.
Waiter: Right this way, ma'am. [he pulls back the chair for Lena as she sits on it] Will there be anything else?
Lena: Is my rose on straight?
Waiter: You look fabulous! [David walks in wearing a fancy suit] Your lady caller awaits. [David walks up to the table]
Lena: Hello, my dear. I must say you look ravishing tonight.
David: Oh, my, I never thought I'd meet another kid with white hair, but you're awfully stunning. Tell me about yourself. [sits down in a chair that the waiter has brought to him]
Lena: Well, I'm a scientist and inventor
David: Fascinating. So am I.
Lena: And I attend Royal Woods elementary. You must've seen me there.
David: I don't recall.
Lena: I'm in the same grade as you.
David: I wasn't aware.
Lena shows him the school newspaper with a picture of her in her lab suit and holding beakers]
Lena: I'm in the school newspaper! Come on! I paid a lotta money for his photo! [Puts the newspaper away] Never mind, never mind. I'd like to hear more about you.
David: Well…
Lisa: Lena!
Lena: Lisa!
David: Lisa?
Lisa: David?
Lincoln: [jumps in the air] Lincoln!
Lisa: Lincoln...! Lena, what are you doing with my friend?
Lena: This dreamboat is your friend?
Lisa: [to David] This no-good conniving chiseler is your date!?
Waiter: And this devilishly handsome sponge is your waiter.
Lena: Get away! [the waiter goes away]
Lisa: I don't know what sort of skulduggery you're up to, Lena, and I'm not waiting to find out. [the child scientist activated her backpack and robotic arms pop out and grab her arch enemy, holding her up]
David: Lisa, you better put that precious girl down, this instant!
Lena: Precious?
Lisa: But, David…
Lena: You heard the man. Let me go. [Lisa drops her]
Lena: That's more like it.
Lisa: David, listen to me. Lena is my arch rival. She's an evil mastermind. She once controlled Leni's mind and faked a friendship with Luna.
David: Or maybe you're just making things up because of your history with her and you can't stand seeing us together.
Lisa: But-but-
David: Come, Lena. I'm sorry my so-called friend had to spoil our romantic evening.
Lisa: David? [Lisa looks upset and Lincoln pats her back]
The next day at the Shroud house, Lena is cleaning a picture of David as Lisa breaks in.
Lisa: You!
Lena: Lisa.
Lisa: I came to warn you, Lena. Stay away from David. I know what you're really up to.
Lena: I'm serious, Lisa. I've changed my ways. And all it took was the love of a handsome man.
Lisa: All you love is thieving and conniving. Now, stop trying to get the invention out of David.
Lena: What are you talking about?
Lisa: I'm talking about my secret invention, obviously!
Lena: David knows the secret invention?
Lisa: Don't play stupid with me. Of course he does. Only my family and closest friends know about it, and you're no friend of mine! [Lena frowns] I'm telling you for the last time: stay away from David. [walks out]
Lena: No problem. With David as my boyfriend, he'll have to tell me the secret invention.
Cut to David walking into Lynn's Table where Lisa planned to have a chat with him.
David: Lisa!
Lisa: David!
David: I don't want you interfering in my love life.
David: David, can't you see? She's trying to seduce my secret invention right from under you.
David: For your information, Lisa, she hasn't asked me once about your invention. I doubt that she even knows that I know it.
Lisa: [chuckles nervously, pulling her shirt as she realizes she let that slip needlessly.] Uh, yeah...funny thing about that.
David: I'm going to see Lena whether you like it or not.
Lisa: You want to hang out with my despicable arch enemy? Go ahead. It doesn't concern me. [the little genius walks away]
Lena: [comes in] Somebody call heaven because I think an angel's gone missing.
David: Oh, Lena.
Lena: Oh, David.
Lisa: Oh, brother.
Lena: Attention, attention, everyone. I'd like to make an announcement. David, in full view of this restaurant, I ask you for your hand in holy matrimony.
Crowd: Aw!
Lena: Would you be my boyfriend? [she grabs his hands]
Lisa: Ah, that's it! No more hiding in my room like a scared little kid, it's time to act like a woman! [she charges, screaming, and runs towards her Lena]
Lena: Gasp!
Lisa: [stops and pleads to David] Please don't do it, David! Don't be the boyfriend of this bad, bad woman! I don't want you to!
Lena: Too late, Loud. We're going to be a couple. And there's nothing you can do about it! [laughs maniacally.]
David: I can do something about it. I'll have to say no.
Lena: [stops laughing] Huh? W-What do you mean "no"?
David: I'm flattered by your offer, really I am, but I'm just not ready for that kind of commitment. I'd rather focus on science than to commit to anyone really. [Lisa laughs]
Lena: What is this? There's somebody else, isn't there?
Lenabot: [breaks into Lynn's Table with flowers] I... I... this is very uncomfortable. I'll just wait outside.
Lena: I don't believe this! You led me on!
David: Now, now Lena, it's not what you think.
Lena: I don't wanna hear your lies! You owe me for leading on like this! Tell me what Lisa's secret invention is and we'll call it even.
David: The invention? Is that what this whole thing was about?
Lena: No! No, not really. I mean... not at first. I mean uh... Uh, honey bunch? [The male scientist pulls out an invention of his own: some kind of cannon blaster ] Uh-oh. [she is blasted back to her home] Oh, well. Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all! [Lena ends up flying into the living room. Her sister Alison is there]
Alison: Lena?
Lena is dazed from the impact.
Alison: [mockingly] So I take it that things went well with trying to find true love?
Lena: [groans] Don't mock me, woman. I'm not in the mood. Just me the medical kit. I got an owie…