A/N: Welcome to Paris and yet another possibly controversial elimination.
A shot of the forest floor is shown as Chris begins the recap. "Last time on total drama!" Lightning is shown falling towards the piranhas in the river below, then team Valkyrie is shown being held at spearpoint, followed by Alejandro saving Lightning from the cocoon. "The contestants experienced every pitfall Peru can put forward." Teams Conquest and Chris are shown at Machu Picchu, followed by Valkyrie tied up with the Zing Zings. "They visited some ancient landmarks, and hung out with the locals."
Topher is shown glaring at Anne Maria after seeing Veronica's confession, then Amy's surprise at Dawn's vote is shown. . "Someone's feelings got hurt, and Amy got a real wake up call." Team Chris is shown celebrating in first class. "And Team Chris proved worthy of their awesome Namesake!"
Chris is shown in the cockpit to end the recap. "Fourteen contestants, one million dollars, loads more exotic locales to destroy right here. On Total! Drama! Woooorrrrlllddd~ Tooouuurrrr~!"
Intro
Intro
A stage light pops up in front of the CN tower, we switch to the interior of the plane as another light pops out of the ceiling, outside the plane a camera pops out of the engine startling a raccoon, we see a suitcase pop open and a clap board is used. The camera moves through first class passing a drink cart on the way and causing Chris to jump out of the aisle.
Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;
(Chef is in the cockpit, the cook gives the camera glare as it passes through. The camera moves past several bagages trucks.)
You guys are on my mind!
(The camera moves past the CN tower and dives into the water.)
Ya asked me what I wanted to be,
(Lightning is swimming in the water when he spots a shark and begins to fight with it.)
And now I think the answer is plain to see!
(Harold stands on top of the straw roof of a hut on a woven boat. An oar flies threw the air to hit him.)
I wanna be...famous!
(Amber and Topher are fighting on the boat, and it is clear one of them accidently hit Harold in the tussle. Crocodiles leap from the water snapping their jaws. The boat moves off screen and we see a crocodile wince on the word be. The camera moves back to the boat revealing it had run into an inflatable raft where Alejandro is standing. Amber panics and tries to help while Topher just laughs.
I wanna live close to the sun!
(The camera moves to the statue of liberty, we cut to the top where Brick is offering Jo a helping hand, only for her to grab it and body slam him instead.)
Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!
(Tyler runs past the two, pushing a baby carriage holding Noah. Max is nearby and the jock trips over her, sending Noah flying out of the carriage and into a sign.)
Everythin' to prove,
(Noah lands in Eva's arms as she stands on a tundra. He gives her a grateful smile.)
Nothin' in my way;
I'll get there one day.
(We pan right where Amy rolls her eyes. A polar bear taps on her shoulder and she looks horrified, but then Dawn and Ella calm the bear and Amy smiles.)
'Cause I wanna be...famous!
(We zoom in past ice caps to see Duncan and Gwen surfing a giant wave. It seems to be too much as they are swept up in the surf.)
Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa
(Xena and Anne Maria are walking across a New York City crosswalk. They are startled as the jet passes them, sending leaves through the air. We switch to a scene of the contestants in a human pyramid atop the jet, wearing parachutes and kicking in beat. The bottom row contains Jo, Anne Maria, Harold, Max, Xena, and Brick. The first row up contains Topher, Amber Alejandro, Eva, and Noah, the next row up contains Duncan, Gwen, Amy, and Tyler, on top of the pyramid is Lightning holding Ella and Dawn on one of his shoulders each.)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(The plane passes big ben,causing the clock face to pop out. It passes the arc de Triomphe causing a mime to drop his croissant. It flies past a rock balancing on.a stone pillar, knocking it off and causing it to fall in front of the camera kicking up dust)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(The dust clears to show, Ella and Dawn smiling at one another, It pans to show Eva glaring, then down to Jo.)
(The lyrics end and we see Chef Hatchet glare. He turns the plane, sending all the contestants falling through the air in parachutes. Everyone but Max lands in front of a sign with the show's name on it. As the song ends Max lands face first in the middle of the group)
Intro end
The episode proper starts in first class Tyler is getting a massage while Gwen is sketching something. Xena meanwhile is writing in a notebook. Brick bursts in through the door, a stern look on his face. Tyler frowns. "What's wrong?"
"I woke up and went to use the facilities. While I was there I noticed my wrist watch was broken. Did any of you see anything last night?" The cadet asked. A chorus of negative responses greeted him. He leveled a look at Xena. "Did you have anything to do with this?"
"When asking such a question you must first ask: How would it benefit me? Our team is working together well, and I would not jeopardize that." Xena responded.
"So you say, but technically if we started fighting it would take the target off your back." Gwen pointed out.
Tyler looked nervous on behalf of his friend. "She wouldn't do that. I know her. Besides weren't you the one who threatened to break the watch if he kept the alarm on?"
Gwen huffed. "Yeah, but first off, he hasn't, and second it was only to make him stop using the alarm."
"Fighting does us no good. I suggest we be more proactive." Xena said.
"As much as I may not agree with some of her past deeds, I have to say Xena is right in this instance. Blaming each other will get a us nowhere." Brick agreed.
[Confessional]
Max: I had the most brilliant idea. When people live together they go kinda crazy. So if something gets broken or goes up missing they blame it on each other. I figured if I broke Brick's watch it might put a stop to their little goodie two shoes act. I desire chaos! [He laughs manically]
Static
/
In economy class, Team Valkyrie is on the right bench while team Conquest sits on the left. The focus is on team Valkyrie. In particular, Topher, who is currently crying.
Jo leveled a look at the jersey reject. "I don't like him either, but you two need to sort out your issues or we'll lose again!"
"How exactly? I already apologized. It didn't do anything!" Anne Maria said. She turned to Dawn. "What do you think?"
"Well… Topher's definitely feeling betrayed. I can see it in his aura, and when you apologized, you weren't really that specific. Maybe you need to think about what you're apologizing for." Dawn said.
Next to her Amy looked nervous.
[Confessional]
Amy: So…I've been thinking about what Dawn did, and I'm just not sure where I stand with her. After how I've been treating her, what could I possibly say to apologize?
Static
Meanwhile, Team Conquest Lightning is looking upset. "Lightning just can't believe we've lost two challenges in a row when he's on the team."
"Right, because you're the one doing all the heavy lifting." Noah remarked sarcastically.
"You said it girl! Lightning always carries the team!" Lightning said.
"You act like you're the only one who ever does anything." Eva glared.
"Well Lightning obviously is! He was kidnapped by caterpillars and we lost!" The football jock said.
"Because you couldn't fight off a bunch of caterpillars." Duncan pointed out.
"Maybe someone should have helped Lightning. Al and Noa watched me get dragged away!
"I don't know what you're talking about." Alejandro said.
Noah slammed the book he had been reading shut, and stormed out of the room.
[Confessional]
Noah: That's it. I can't stand it anymore. Between Topher's crying, my team's arguing, and the fact that Lightning is still misgendering me, I might lose it.
Static
In the cockpit a sputtering sound can be heard. Chef frowned. "Well that ain't good."
Back in economy the intercom goes off. the chef's voice can be heard. "Ya'll might wanna grab something heavy."
As this announcement is said the plane begins to veer wildly the contestants all scream and buckle up. Team Valkyrie all hold on to Jo, while Duncan and Alejandro hold on to each other, and Noah finds himself shoved under Eva's armpit.
The plane lands in the Seine river before coming to a stop. In the cockpit Chris scolds Chef who is in the foot space. "You said we were landing at the Eiffel tower!"
"And you said the disrepair of the plane would only add to the drama. Don't blame this on me! You get what you pay for!" The cook snapped.
/
The teams are shown in front of the louvre Museum. Chris stands before them holding flash cards. "I didn't exactly get a chance to prep my introduction what with the unexpected water landing and all. I'm just gonna give the highlights." He begins to go through the cards. "France, city of love, art gallery, filler, lots of artwork, priceless, priceless artwork-"
The focus moves to Duncan and Gwen. "So the city of love." Gwen smirked.
"Eh, Paris is a little mainstream, don't you think?" Duncan asked.
"I mean, I'd agree with you except that the catacombs are here. Be a nice place to go fordate." The goth said.
"All those skulls are pretty awesome." The punk admitted.
Alejandro sighed. "You are so lucky to be together. Amber would have loved this."
"I think you're all overlooking the big thing here. Paris is the fashion capital of the world! I totally gotta go shopping while we're here! Topher you wanna," Anne Maria paused as she remembered he was still mad at her. Then she huffed and tried to pretend she didn't care.
Chris interrupted. "There's no time for shopping! The first challenge is about to start so everyone inside the Louvre."
"I believe it's Louvre." Xena corrected his pronunciation.
"Whatever, just do it already." Chris ordered, now annoyed.
/
Chef wheeled in a large box on a dolly. He looked tired as he set the box down. "Challenge time kids!" Chris announced. "Each team gets their very own famous sculpture." He handed team Conquest a picture. "Team Conquest yours is the thinker." He handed Team Chris a picture next. "Team Chris is really, really, really, evil you guys get the Venus de milo." Chris handed the final picture to team Valkyrie. "Valkyrie. You get the statue of David."
"Here's how it works." the host continued. "It's up to you to find your statue hidden somewhere in the Louvre." Once again Chris pronounced it wrong, though this time he seemed aware of that fact.
"That should be easy considering how big they are." Tyler smiled.
"About that." The host smirked as Chef joined him. "Chef has broken the statues into pieces and hidden them. First team to find their pieces, race to the pyramid court and reassemble them wins. The remaining two teams will compete for immunity in the second half of the challenge."
"But the thinker isn't even in the Louvre. And the statue of David isn't even in this country." Alejandro pointed out.
"Well we're not using the actual statues." Chris told them. "Those are priceless Chef made fake ones right?"
A worried look came over the cook's face as he chuckled and ran off.
"I almost forgot the Twist Twist." Chris added, he took out a remote. "Here's your motivation." He pressed the button on the remote and the box Chef had brought in opened to reveal three creatures, the sachwawakawa, a grizzly bear with a chainsaw, and a baby seal.
"Isn't that the baby seal we ran over in the Yukon?" Duncan said. The seal growled at them.
"Yeah, and I think he's vindictive." Noah deadpanned.
"I'd start running." Chris told the teens, pointing over his shoulder.
The teams are shown running past Chris. Team Chris is followed by the Sachwawakwa, Team Valkyrie by the bear, and of course Team Conquest by the seal.
The focus is on Tyler and Brick as they run away. "I don't wanna die!" Tyler screamed.
"I think I have an idea!" The cadet said, sliding to a stop, He turned and gave the yeti a firm look. "Attention!" He barked. The yeti stopped in place. "About face." The yeti turned around, still standing shock straight. "Company March! Left, left, left, right, left." As Brick continued to bark orders the yeti marched away until he was out of sight.
"Brick, that was awesome!" Gwen cheered.
"Thank you, soldier. Now let's find some statue pieces.
/
We see Team Valkyrie walking through the halls. Jo is already carrying the torso of their statue. "Hurry up! We need to pick up the pace if we wanna beat the other teams!"
Topher sees a small figure of two people hugging. He glares at it. Anne Maria looked like she wanted to say something, but she turned from him with a huff instead. Then the bear showed up, and held its chainsaw high in preparation to attack.
/
Team Conquest is making their way through the museum. They have found several of their statue pieces. Lightning, Eva, and Alejandro are all holding a lot of them.
"Thanks to Lightning we're almost done!" The football jock said.
Eva glared. "You're not the only one carrying pieces."
"And Noah's the one who managed to get seal to stop attacking you." Duncan pointed out.
"And Duncan found a lot of the pieces." Noah added.
"Only cause Lightning cleared the room out." Lightning said.
"Throwing everything across the room does not count as 'helping'." The cynic deadpanned.
"Girl, what's your problem with the Lightning?" The football jock asked.
Noah froze in place, practically vibrating with anger. "I'm going to look for pieces ahead." He said, storming off.
Alejandro sighed. "Do you have to be so loud? How am to wax melancholic about the tragic irony of our challenge taking place in the romance capital of the of the world directly after the departure of my girlfriend?"
"You aren't. Get over it lover boy, we need you to focus." Eva said.
Alejandro sighed. "As you wish mi amiga"
/
Team Chris has also found several of their statue pieces. Brick and Tyler are both holding several. The cadet turned to his team. "Well done soldiers. We're well on our way to winning this thing."
"That said, we ought to pick up the pace a bit. I saw Team Conquest and they had made about as much progress." Xena explained.
"Oh yeah! Let's kick it into high gear!" Tyler cheered, running ahead, the focus is placed on Gwen, who winces as a comedic crashing sound can be heard. The focus moves right to show Tyler has managed to run right into a pillar with a vase on it. The vase wobbles and the focus shifted to Brick who gasped and dove for the vase, managing to catch it before it broke.
The cadet heaved a relieved sigh. "You okay soldier?"
"Yeah, I'm just glad the vase didn't break." The jock said.
"Yes, that porcelain could have caused severe damage to your head." Brick agreed.
"Oh, I didn't think of that. I just didn't want to get in trouble." Tyler admitted.
Gwen facepalmed. "Tyler, that's the least of your worries."
/
All of team Valkyrie except Dawn screams as the bear revs its chainsaw. Moments later it sputters to a halt and the bear tries to make it start up again. Dawn smiled and walked over to the bear. "Calm down my friend. Is Chris making you do this?"
Anne Maria gasps. "Dawn! We gotta get outta here before the bear tries to cut my head off!"
"Please." Topher scoffed. "As if the chainsaw could make it through that tangle you call hair."
Anne Maria's eyes widened and then she glared. "Oh no. No, no. No one insults the poof! I don't care how mad at me you are!"
"Well now you know how I feel!" Topher snapped.
"I said I was sorry!" The jersey reject retorted.
"Do you even know what you're apologizing for?!" The blonde said.
"You talk about people behind their backs all the time!" Anne Maria glared.
"That's not what I have a problem with!" Topher said.
"You're upsetting him." Dawn said, pointing to the bear.
"Enough! We've wasted too much time." Jo said, she pointed at the arguing Anne Maria and Topher. "You two can fight all you want! The rest of us are going to find more pieces!"
With that the jockette stormed off with Amy following. Dawn rubbed the bear's head and led it away after the other too. "Sorry about them."
/
Team Chris is standing in front of a laser grid. The Venus de Milo's head lies on a pedestal behind it.
Brick frowned. "I'd hate to ask any of you to risk yourself going through that. So I will go."
"Aw come on man! I was captain of my gymnastics team in kindergym!" Tyler said, before ramming his head into the wall and knocking himself out. Gwen face palmed again.
Xena was stretching. "Negatory. Brick your muscular physique will on be a detriment in this instance. I am far more likely to fit between the lasers."
"Are you sure?" The cadet asked.
"Positive." The overlogical girl said. She moved closer to the laser grid and placed the end of her ponytail into the lasers. It shocked it. "Good to know what will happen should I fail."
The focus moves to a camera room containing Chris, Chef, and Noah. The host chuckled. "Looks like things have taken a shocking turn for our contestants." He tuned to the other. "Electrifying, wouldn't you say?" Chef rolled his eyes. "Too cheesy?"
"Maybe." Chef said.
"We'll be right back." The host said.
/
Back with Anne Maria and Topher the two have lapsed into silence. Chris stepped into the situation. "Hey my name is Chris and I'm the host of the show." He said in an overly nice tone. "Did you know you're on it? Right now? And supposed to be doing a challenge?!" He said now showing his irateness.
"Not my fault Topher can't take an apology." Anne Maria said.
"Not my fault Anne Maria doesn't know what she's apologizing for." Topher huffed.
"I don't care." The host told them.
"I just wish there was a way for me to express how angry I am!" The blonde said.
"Well Topher, it's your lucky day!" Chris smirked. A familiar bell rang. "You know what that means? It's time for you to sing. Or you're off my show."
"You want us to sing now!" Anne Maria complained.
"Correction. I want Topher to sing now." Chris smirked. "I think this ought to be a solo."
Topher smirked. "Well then, who am I to deprive our fans?"
(Song eleven: Qui my friends.)
The song begins with a distant view of a painting in between two black busts. Slowly the view zooms in until we can see Topher in a painting of the streets of a city. Several people hold umbrellas. Topher walks along and poses as he sings the first Line. "I look good in Paris in the springtime!"
He jumps to a different painting, this one of a sidewalk lined with small trees in autumn colors. People are walking down it while a carriage goes down the street directly left. Topher holds a warm to go cup of coffee as he poses again. "I look great in Paris in the fall!"
Topher leapt out of that painting into a third one. This one was a wide open park. Several trees stood in the background, and many people in colorful outfits stood in the park. In the background of the far left corner is a lake with two sailboats on it. Topher kneels in an empty spot with a picnic blanket under him. "It's the quaintest of backdrops in the summer," He frowned. "but now it's just a bummer cause-"
Topher now stands next to a painting that is clearly a prop as it has Anne Maria's face on it. She is dressed in a dark blue old fashioned dress. As Topher sings the next line he begins to paint over it with bright red."My friend broke my heart and chewed it up and spit it out and then, stepped on it and threw it down a sewer, called it names and then laughed!"
Topher is shown in a painting once again this time one with a woman doing the can can in that kind of dress. The dress is yellow and orange. "Qui, my friends, don't expect her to stay true."
The next painting has two large trees that make up the majority of its background, a wooden swing hangs down from the closer one and Topher swings on it as he sings the next line. "Qui, my friends, she'll talk badly about you."
The next painting is of a guy and girl holding hands and smiling. "Oui, my friends! She will-" Topher takes a deep breath.
A prop statue that looks a lot like the venus de milo with Anne Maria's head is shown. Topher uses a mallet to knock the head off the statue then begins to hit it repeatedly until the hair breaks off."Break your heart and chew it up and spit it out and step on it and throw it down a sewer and call it names, and then laugh!"
Tyler is shown looking concerned. "Qui my friend, I know you can make it though."
Xena is shown in the lasers barely managing to avoid hitting any. "Uh, thanks my friend, we will see if that holds true" A laser comes out of nowhere and burns the tip of her shoe.
A brief bit of music without lyrics is accompanied by Chef dancing. The remaining three members of team Valkyrie stand to his left. Topher steps into their view. "Qui my friends now I'm feeling oh so blue!" Anne Maria catches up to him.
Jo: You're still arguing?
Anne Maria: It's not my fault!
Topher: Qui my friends, so now I'm telling you-" Once again he takes a deep breath.
A Painting of Anne Maria's head is shown. Her head is surrounded by a swirling magenta background. Shortly after we see Topher is holding this picture and glaring at it as he sings the next line. "If you become friends with a girl on a show, and you get on really well, it's because you didn't know, she actually thinks you're an overblown hack with no acting skills, then you will!"
Back in the Louvre Topher dances the can- can then kneels and slides forward to end the song. "Oui, end up in Paris! Oui, feeling disparaisse! Cause she never had any faith in you at all!"
"Seriously, what a drama queen." Amy scoffed.
/
We see that team Valkyrie has reached the lobby. "Move it! We've wasted enough time!" Jo snapped.
In another part of the same area Alejandro addresses Team Conquest. "Alright, Quickly now put our pieces over there." He said pointing.
The two teams put their pieces down at the same time in the same place. "Hey you got Thinker in our David!" Duncan scowled.
"You did that on purpose!" Amy two teams began to argue. Meanwhile Team Chris has finally arrived.
They set the pieces down and Brick nodded. "Alright soldiers. Tyler and I lift the pieces, the rest of you work together to figure out how to put it together."
/
With Team Conquest Eva is attempting to put the pieces together but unfortunately she's being given bad instructions.
"Put the long piece under the thing, then rotate it clockwise? Clockwise? Counterclockwise? Lightning can never remember which direction is what." The football jock said.
"Ugh! Just figure it out already!" The iron woman complained.
Duncan held up a piece. "I don't think this is even part of our statue."
"I still think we should have sorted all the pieces out before starting." Noah said.
"And waste that much time? Lightning doesn't get you girl."
Noah glared, and opened his mouth to say something. Alejandro cut him off nervously. "Noah, why don't you look through the pile while we figure this out?"
The cynic nodded firmly. "Fine." He stormed off.
"Okay? Seriously, what's been her deal lately? Lightning doesn't know why she's been so mad at him." The football jock said.
"It's a real mystery." Alejandro glared.
/
The focus is on Amy and Dawn who are standing off to the side as the rest of the team works on the statue. The cheerleader rubs her wrist. "So…" She muttered. "So I…" She huffed. "I'm not good at this kind of thing. I have no idea what to say. I mean, I could explain why I did what I did, but you probably already know. And like, how am I supposed to make up for it? I don't know, but…maybe I shouldn't have blamed you for Ella's departure. And, at least you feel bad about it."
Dawn smiled at her gently. "This is a big step for you Amy, and I'm proud."
Amy nodded. "Yeah. Well I've lost sight of the real reason Ella's gone." With that she looked up and narrowed her eyes, the focus moved out to show she is glaring at team Conquest. She walks off and Dawn swallowed nervously before looking at the camera. "I said it was step in the right direction. It's still Amy."
The focus shifted to show Team Valkyrie looking at their statue. It doesn't look right at all. The limbs are way too big, the wrong head is on, the legs almost seem backwards. "Ugh! This is impossible!" Jo snapped.
The focus moved left to show team Conquest in a similar situation. The wrong head, torso, and limbs. "There, we finished." Lightning smirked.
"Lightning, that doesn't match the picture at all." Alejandro pointed out, showing said picture.
Team Chris was nearly finished, all that was left was the head. "Well done soldiers we're almost done." Brick said. With that he placed the head on to the statue finishing it.
"And Team I am so wonderfully evil has it!" Team Conquest and Team Valkyrie are shown finishing their statues. "Ooh and the other two teams have finished too close to tell. Team Me takes first class!"
"Since Conquest and Valkyrie finished at pretty much the same time, they'll be going to a tie breaker challenge." Chris announced.
"Uh couldn't you just review the footage?" Noah asked.
"Where's the fun in that?" Chris asked.
"Then what is the tie breaker?" Alejandro asked.
"Since we're in the fashion capital of the world, I declare that it's a walk off people!" the host said excitedly.
"Oh we have this. No one on Team conquest knows a thing about fashion!" Amy smirked.
Alejandro glared at her. "I refute that claim."
"One member of each team will choose a designer, and just to spice things up you have to choose someone from the other competing team to model for you. And if you're chosen you must do it or your team will forfeit."
"Oh yeah! With my fashion sense we'll kill this!" Anne Maria said.
"Uh, no. I should design it." Amy smirked.
"Why? My fashion sense is better! Topher will back me up." The jersey reject said. She turned to Topher only to see that he was still upset. She sighed, and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Look, I'm the kinda girl who pushes back when pushed, but I'm tired of arguing. I wanna be friends again. I'm not sure what you're mad about exactly. That's part of the problem. I said I was sorry, but I don't actually know what to apologize for. I thought it was because I talked about you behind your back, but you kinda confirmed otherwise."
Topher remained silent. Anne Maria continued. "I just hope you know I think you're a great guy, and maybe calling you a bad actor was out of line."
"Apology accepted." The blonde smiled.
"Huh? Why'd this one count?" Anne Maria asked.
Topher beamed. "I was never mad you talked behind my back. I was just mad you didn't think I was a good actor."
"Really? That's what this whole thing was about?" The Jersey reject said.
"Yep." Topher smirked.
Anne Maria smirked back. "Topher you're a petty little diva and I love that about you."
[Confessional]
Topher: [he bows towards the screen.] And scene. You know, everything I did today was stuff I actually felt, but I ramped it up to eleven. I think I've shown you all that I'm still a good actor. Fanphers you can keep faith in me.
Static
Chris cleared his throat. "Now that, that's over pick your designers."
"Seriously you have to pick me." Amy told her team.
"Why?" Anne Maria scoffed.
"Because I know how to psyche our opponents out." the cheerleader explained.
"Sounds good to me." Jo smirked.
"As long as it's dramatic." Topher smirked.
"Obviously I will be the designer for my team." Alejandro said. "Any objections?" No one had any.
"Nice." Chris smirked. "And now, who will your models be?"
"I am admittedly more familiar with male fashion. So Topher." Alejandro said.
The blonde smirked.
"Nice choice. Valkyrie?" The host asked.
"Noah." Amy smirked.
The cynic's eyes shot wide open. "What! Why me?!"
"Because I only know women's fashion, and you're the only one on your team that can pull it off." The cheerleader explained.
"I'm not doing it! You cannot make me crossdress on international TV!" Noah snapped.
"Remember kiddies if you're chosen to model you have to, or your team will forfeit the challenge." Chris reminded him.
Noah sighed. "Fine."
"Alright, each designer has to come up with a costume for their model to wear. Then Chef, a member of team Chris, and yours truly will do the judging. The model who wins prevents their team from going to elimination." Chris explained.
/
Noah is glaring at his reflection in the mirror. Amy is currently tying a large pink bow into his hair. We can't see the rest of the outfit but Noah is also wearing a powder blue blouse. "Are you done messing with my hair yet?" The cynic complained.
"Almost." Amy smirked, straightening the bow. "There. Aww, now don't you look cute?"
"At least it's almost over." Noah sighed.
"Oh, did I forget to mention I'm also using makeup?" The cheerleader smirked.
Noah buried his head in his hands. I'm never going to live this down.
/
Meanwhile in the other dressing room Alejandro finishes tying a light pink sweater around Topher's neck so it hangs down on his back. "Not too shabby if I do say so myself."
"Of course not. I'm hot enough to pull anything off." Topher smirked.
/
The non participating members were in a crowd on the left side of a pop up runway, at the end stood the judge's podium. Chris sat in the middle, Chef on the right, and Gwen on the left. "I literally hate fashion." The goth complained.
"Which is why you were chosen." Chef smirked.
"First on stage, Alejandro couture as worn by Topher." Chris announced in a terrible french accent.
Music began to play as Topher stepped out. He's wearing a royal blue polo shirt with a light pink sweater tied over his shoulders, chino shorts, pink socks, and a set of fabulous royal blue boots. He owns the runway, blowing kisses and posing for invisible cameras.
"And here comes Noah, wearing an original from Amy." Chris announced still with the terrible accent.
Noah reluctantly steps out onto the runway. He's wearing a large pink bow in his hair, powder blue eyeshadow, pink lipstick, a powder blue blouse, knee length pink skirt, powder blue leggings, and pink flats. He walked across the stage with a scowl as Duncan and Alejandro laughed. That was not the worst part. Lightning was staring at him with his mouth open.
"Sha dang girl, you clean up nice!" The football jock complimented.
At this Noah lost it. "You insufferable, dimwitted, misgendering cretin! For the last time. I am not a girl!" With this Noah took his shoes off and threw them at the jock before storming off in a huff.
"Okay…" Chris trailed. "What do you think Judges?"
"Honestly? I could care less. Both outfits are fine. Way too pastel for me, but fine." Gwen scoffed. "Can I leave now?"
"Personally I've never been a fan of the shoulder sweater thing." Chef remarked. "As for Amy's, while it looks good on him it's so basic. Where's the innovation?!"
"I can totally pull off the over the shoulder sweater look, and Amy's looked so outdated. Like it's the twenty first century? Hello? The nineteen fifties called. They want their clothes back." Chris chuckled. Then he became serious. "Seriously though, you two. Your votes are completely inconclusive."
Chef and Gwen looked at each other and rolled their eyes. "Well I don't care for either outfit, but Topher actually walked the walk, so I guess I vote for him."
"Yeah, Noah lost it. Not that I blame him. So I guess I vote for Topher too." Gwen said.
Chris smirked. "Then we have a winner." Team Conquest is shown, sans Noah, waiting in anticipation. "Team Valkyrie!" The focus moved to said team who were now celebrating.
"What!" All of team Conquest gasped.
"But it was my outfit that won!" Alejandro complained.
"Yes, but if you remember I said the team whose model did the best would save their team from elimination. We weren't judging the outfits themselves, we were judging how well the models pulled those outfits off." Chris smirked.
Noah stormed out of the back, now in his normal clothes. His team looked at him. "What?"
/
On the plane Noah, Alejandro, and Eva were all meeting. "We're in an alliance, and I want Lightning gone."
Eva frowned. "I do hate him, but you are the reason we lost."
"Actually, I'd argue Lightning is the reason we lost. If he hadn't been misgendering Noah for so long, he might have been more okay with the dress." Alejandro pointed out.
Eva nodded. "You have a point."
/
Team Conquest is at elimination. Chris begins the proceedings. "Team Conquest. Not doing so well are we? Second elimination, and you haven't won since New York. Anyway, you've all voted and made your decision. "Barf bags go to, Alejandro, Duncan, and Eva." Chris announced, throwing the bags to each person as he said their name. Noah and Lightning glare at each other.
"You two are at the bottom. Let's explain why. Lightning you've been rude, claiming to carry the team, and consistently misgendered Noah. Noah, you kind of blew it on the runway." Chris said.
"Just throw me the barf bag Chris." Noah said.
"Yeesh. Way to ruin the tension." The host said, throwing Noah the final bag.
"What! You're voting off the Lightning?!" The football jock said. "Noa should be the one to leave! She's the one who lost us the challenge!"
Noah stomped over to Lightning. "Get off the plane Rudolph, or I'll push you out myself."
Alejandro and Duncan started laughing. "Your name is Rudolph?!" The punk said.
"After all the time you've called me Al, this is so cathartic for me!" The Spaniard said.
Lightning looked embarrassed as he took the parachute from Chris. "Whatever. Lightning does need y'all anyway!" With that he jumped off the plane.
/
Chris and Chef are shown in the cockpit. "That's one more teen off the plane. Will next week be this insane? Find out next time on Total! Drama! Woooorrrrlllddd~ Tooouuurrrr~!"
A/N: And so Lightning leaves, ironically not because of the animal curse, but because of his misgendering. It thought that would be an ironic way for him to go. And because of the screwing over of Lindsay in the OG episode I decided this should be one of those challenges where Chris' phrase is very specific for a reason. Kind of like the bike episode in season one. Main reason for getting rid of Lightning is because DJ's curse doesn't do too much in the next couple episodes, and I wanted Lightning to go for a different reason anyway. I hope I did well enough building up Noah's annoyance with him.
Team Chris doesn't have too much going on, but they will soon. They're in first class again after all. Max is going to strike again. Tyler and Brick continue to be cute though.
Then of course there's Team Valkyrie. Dawn and Amy kind of make amends, Amy finally gets some revenge on team Conquest. The real star here is Topher and Anne Maria. Anne Maria strikes me as the type to push back when pushed. Topher does feel genuinely betrayed but he's ramping those feelings up for the sake of Drama. I just wanted them to be more enjoyable than the canon equivalent. [Seriously, Sierra should have been eliminated in this episode, or at least given a reality check.]
Qui my friends was really fun to rewrite. [Yes I know the actual song is called Paris in the springtime, but Qui my friends fits so much better]