Last day before the Christmas holidays.
We get to see more actions about the war against Voldemort.
LILY XLI
The scene would have been quite amusing for any outside observer. And despite the seriousness of the situation on this last day of school before the Christmas holidays, Lily couldn't stop herself from finding a certain level of entertainment in the argument taking place between the High Inquisitor and the Professor of Transfiguration.
"The Hogwarts staff, especially its headmaster," declared Umbridge, casting a venomous look at Dumbledore who was also watching the argument from behind his desk, "has no authority over the High Inquisitor chosen by the Ministry of Magic."
"Be it as it may," McGonagall shot back, "the High Inquisitor only has the powers that the Ministry of Magic and its laws grant her. And in this particular case, the High Inquisitor has never been granted any authority over the prefects."
"You're playing with words, McGonagall. Educational Decree Number Twenty-Five grants the High Inquisitor, me in this case, complete authority over all disciplinary sanctions given within the school, without exceptions."
"To be more accurate, dear Mrs Umbridge," Dumbledore said, "the educational decree you're talking about does grant you the right to modify, cancel, suspend, or refer to a committee for examination any disciplinary sanction, but it defines a disciplinary sanction as any kind of disciplinary action taken by a member of Hogwarts' staff, against a student, resulting from a student violating internal regulations of the school, including while not being limited to, removal of points, detentions, additional work, removal of privileges, financial punishments or expulsion."
Dumbledore read a scroll as he summarized the content of the decree, though Lily doubted the scroll truly contained the decree. Dumbledore could possibly be reading a blank scroll, remembering word for word the content of the decree, only to further give Umbridge the impression that he was quoting the decree itself.
"If we read the preamble of the decree, we will see that its stated goal is to prevent abuses of authority and incompetence from the staff of Hogwarts. There is absolutely no mention of prefects or students holding any kind of authority in this decree." Dumbledore put down the scroll face down as he went on. "The people at the Ministry responsible for developing this decree probably failed to explain you the true extent of your authority, Mrs Umbridge, but this is not our fault if your colleagues did a poor job at communicating with you. Because when we read the decree, it does not give you authority, nor was it the intent of the decree to give you this authority, to modify detentions given by prefects."
Umbridge looked like she was about to explode. Lily and the rest of the staff had been aware of this gap in the decree for a very long time. Dumbledore had found it at the very beginning and informed them about it, though they decided that they should wait for the right moment to use it, in the more than likely scenario it would prove useful one day. However, a young prefect from Gryffindor had found this gap as well and, two days ago, he used it. This resulted in the heated argument they currently had, with Umbridge defending with all her will that she could, as High Inquisitor, also decide over detentions given by prefects, even though they were not members of Hogwarts staff.
But now, Umbridge seemed to be at a loss of words. But she tried to regain her composure fairly quickly.
"You are playing with words as well, Dumbledore," she stated. "You say that I only have authority over the school's staff? Well, who chooses the prefects?"
"The Heads of House, in consultation with me and their colleagues, when necessary. As for the Head Boy and Head Girl, they are chosen unanimously by the headmaster and the four Heads of House."
"Well, given that it is the staff of the school who designates prefects, and given that their authority is a delegation of authority by you and your colleagues, Dumbledore, I do consider them as being part of the staff."
Dumbledore raised an eyebrow in an apparent surprise. "You consider students to be part of the staff of the school?"
"These students have disciplinary authority over their comrades, they conduct activities that are usually reserved to professors and staff members, and they are working under the supervision of the headmaster. For the Minister, this is enough to consider them as staff members."
"They are not," Minerva countered. "Prefects have existed in Hogwarts for centuries, and they have never been considered to be staff members."
"I'm afraid you're not the best placed to judge it, my dear Minerva," Umbridge said on her sweet, condescending tone. "The Ministry of Magic has another view, and in this domain, this is the only view that matters."
"I apologize for contradicting you, dear Dolores," Dumbledore intervened, "but I disagree. As Headmaster, I consider that Mr Ronald Weasley was well within his prerogatives as prefect to give a detention to Mr Gregory Goyle. Mr Goyle violated internal rules of the school by using heinous language and disrespecting an authority figure in front of a large crowd of students."
"I have several witnesses who confirmed that Mr Goyle never used such language," Umbridge countered.
"They are only four, and all friends of the student at fault," McGonagall stated. "And we have nearly fifteen other students who confirmed they heard the same thing as Mr Weasley. And these students came from all houses. Even a student from Slytherin confirmed what Mr Goyle said."
"It is not to you to decide who to believe, Minerva."
"I'm afraid it is her duty, Dolores," Dumbledore said. "And so is mine, since the decree gave you no authority over prefects' decisions. As such, the detention given by the Prefect Ronald Weasley to Mr Gregory Goyle will be applied. If you disapprove of our own interpretation of the Educational Decree Number Twenty-five, then feel free to bring the matter to the Wizengamot. In the meantime, we will apply it as we interpret it. We will adjust our application of the decree if the Wizengamot considers it is worth it. I am sure that its members will be more than happy to rule over such a matter."
Lily knew at this moment that Dumbledore had won. Fudge had a few problems with the Wizengamot over a few mistakes he made during the last few months, including when he summoned the whole Wizengamot to judge Harry over a simple matter of magic use outside the school. Fudge had to be more careful over what matters he brought to the assembly, and he would probably fear further discontent from the Wizengamot if it was asked to rule over such a trivial matter as the interpretation of an educational decree.
"As you wish, Dumbledore," Umbridge said on an icy tone. "But this is not over."
On that, the High Inquisitor left. All three people in the room had reactions showing their relief at her departure.
"It could have been worse," McGonagall said, not very convincing.
"How much time before she comes back with a decree giving her complete power over disciplinary actions by Prefects?" Lily asked, not having many doubts about the answer.
"Not very long," Dumbledore conceded calmly. "We are more than likely to be welcomed by an amended Educational Decree Number Twenty-Five by the return of Christmas. Fudge will likely prefer that to adopting a full new decree. It is simpler, faster, and generates way less attention than creating a new decree."
"Any chance that Fudge might go even faster and amend the decree by the end of the day?" Lily asked.
"Unlikely," Dumbledore replied. "If it was Draco Malfoy who was sanctioned, he might have gone the extra mile for Lucius' son, but I highly doubt he will rush to amend a decree on the day before his own Christmas vacations for a boy whose father is in Azkaban. Even Fudge likely doesn't want to be disturbed by such a trivial matter while he prepares to spend Christmas with his family."
In that case, it meant that Gregory Goyle would have to suffer his detention, which was good news, although it came with one that wasn't so positive.
"I apologize, Professor Dumbledore," Lily said. "I know you wanted to keep this ace in your sleeve for a time when it might come in handy."
"Don't apologize, Lily," Minerva McGonagall retorted. "It is not your fault if Mr Goyle accused you of being a bastard Mudblood in the presence of twenty other students, one of them happening to be a Prefect. Mr Weasley was well within his rights to sanction Mr Goyle for disrespecting a professor in such a public display. Though I must admit that I'm surprised he's the one who did this."
"What are you surprised of, Minerva?" Dumbledore asked her. "That Ronald Weasley gave a detention to Mr Goyle? Or that he actually found the same gap we discovered in the decree?"
McGonagall didn't answer, looking partly ashamed for a moment.
"I know that you have your personal opinion about Ronald Weasley, Minerva," Dumbledore went on, "but intelligence is not only measured by academic results. Perhaps if you played a chess game with Mr Weasley, you would realize that he is way more brilliant than you think. Don't forget how he defeated your giant chess game at the age of twelve."
Lily couldn't refrain a smile from creeping on her lips. At the same time, it brought Lily memories of how Harry and his friends endangered their lives for the first time in their very first year in Hogwarts to fight Voldemort.
"I don't doubt the intelligence of Mr Weasley, Professor Dumbledore," McGonagall said, a hint of exasperation in her voice. "Nor do I cast doubt about his courage. Or any of his other qualities. I only wished he used them more efficiently. He could have far better grades, and much better prospects in life if he applied himself better in his studies. And as a Prefect…" The Transfiguration teacher sighed. "He only does the minimum that is required from him. And in the year of his O.W.L.s, he instead chose to dedicate a large part of his energy integrating the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Not to mention that, as well intentioned and justified his sanction of Mr Goyle might be, I'm afraid he missed the bigger picture. We were keeping that gap in the decree existing and unknown to use when it would really be useful, and now he…" She turned quickly to Lily. "Sorry to say that, Lily, but you son's friend wasted it on a relatively trivial matter."
Lily didn't take offence in what McGonagall said. She understood what her former teacher meant. There would indeed have been better opportunities to leverage a Prefect sanction authority than for disciplining a student using heinous words. Now the opportunity was gone.
McGonagall sighed again. "I'm afraid Mr Weasley didn't think about the repercussions his actions will have. Dolores Umbridge will not forget what he did, or that he's the one who did it, for that matter. What do you think will happen when she reports to Fudge that Arthur's son ridiculed his educational decree? And used it against a student whose father some are trying to get free in Fudge's entourage? I beg your pardon, Albus, but despite all the qualities Ronald Weasley shows, I still believe he wasn't the best choice as Prefect."
"Minerva, we have already discussed about all this," Dumbledore said, kindly but firm. "And I don't believe this is the time or place to discuss it further. Now, I believe Gregory Goyle is supposed to have a detention tonight. Maybe we should make sure he understands the cost of holding heinous language towards a teacher by depriving him of his last evening before Christmas holidays."
"I'll do it, Professor Dumbledore," Minerva replied. She walked out of the office, leaving Lily alone with Dumbledore, who granted her a sympathetic smile.
"I think you can take pride in the fact that Minerva continues to believe your son should have been Prefect," he told her.
"I guess," Lily replied, trying to hide the fact a part of her was indeed grateful to Minerva. "But I also believe you were right. Forcing the role of Prefect on Harry would have been adding more responsibilities to him. At a time when he definitely already has too much on his shoulders."
"Indeed. And I also believe that Arthur's son deserves a chance to prove himself. Minerva is hard on him, as she is with all students. We tend to forget that in their first year, we don't expect Prefects to outperform. This is kind of their formative year. We cannot ask them to be perfect from the beginning, not when they are nominated the year they have their O.W.L.s. It is better to not be too demanding for them, and to look at their sixth year to see what they are really able to do."
"You don't need to remind me, Professor Dumbledore. I was Prefect, remember?"
The Headmaster smiled further. "How could I forget? One of the best we ever had."
Lily felt a small reddening in her cheeks.
"Time is passing so quickly," Dumbledore commented. "Sometimes, I surprise myself still thinking about some of my professors as if they were children. I can still remember the day when the little girl you were put the Sorting Hat on her head and then ran to the table of Gryffindor."
Lily smiled at her own memory of the day.
"Or the day Minerva and I chose the Prefects of Gryffindor right before your fifth year. I would say that it was… it took way less time to choose you than your counterpart."
"Were you afraid that James would have a bad influence on Remus, rather than Remus having a good influence on him?" she asked playfully.
"It was part of our worries, to both Minerva and I. But it was also because a strong part of me felt that James should have been made Prefect."
Lily was surprised at this news and looked at Dumbledore with round eyes. "You're joking, aren't you?"
"No, I'm not. A part of me had an irresistible feeling that this kind of responsibility would force James to mature."
Lily laughed loud. "Nothing and no one ever forced James to do anything."
"Except you," Dumbledore countered with a wink. "But… You can call me a romantic fool, Lily, but I already felt at this time that it was his love for you that would make James mature. That being made a Prefect along with you would have brought him to be more responsible. After all, we both know he already loved you back then"
Lily thought about it. She tried to picture James as Prefect in his fifth year, and couldn't help but laugh at the thought. At the same time, Dumbledore might not have been totally wrong. James unfortunately began behaving like an idiot around her when they were in third year. But he also told her later that it was partially her own prowess in class that encouraged him to be the best not only in Quidditch, but also in exams. Lily hadn't known that back when they were students.
"Well, Remus was not a bad choice, on that you can believe me," she said. "Though I wish he did more to rein James in."
"James did turn up quite good in the end," Dumbledore reminded her, perhaps to reassure her. "And to share the thoughts of a current Prefect of Gryffindor, the female Prefect did an already very good job on her own."
Lily laughed at it. Ron Weasley's comments about Hermione Granger had made their way all up to Dumbledore, which proved again that there was little happening in Hogwarts that went unnoticed by its Headmaster, as much as Dumbledore liked to say the opposite.
"I think I need to go," Lily said, looking at her watch. "I still have an afternoon of classes to give before the holidays begin."
"True. And Lily…" She had made it to leave, but turned back towards Dumbledore at the last moment. He smiled kindly again. "We arranged everything. You and Harry are going to have a very good Christmas, I think."
She smiled in return. "Better than the first half of this year."
She left on that, heading for her classroom. Lily wished she didn't have to give those lessons this afternoon. Truth be told, she was eager for the holidays to begin. For the first time in a very long time, she would get to spend actual good quality time with her son. It seemed like an eternity since they really spent time together. She was absent for most of last year, chasing uselessly after Crouch Junior while he was right next to her son in Hogwarts. Then she spent the summer working, first for the Minister, then for the Order. Even after she was forced to resign by Fudge, she spent little time with her son for the remainder of the summer. She had thought that coming to teach at Hogwarts would allow her to watch over him, and indeed, she could, but the problem was that Lily found herself in a situation where she created, both willingly and unwillingly, a certain distance between her and Harry. She was his professor now. So even if she found moments to talk with him, she stopped herself from talking freely to him, not only by avoiding the matter of the Order, but also matters that were limited to the school's staff. She also tried to minimize the problems Umbridge was creating for her, out of an attempt to not make Harry worry. And she felt that Harry was doing the same thing, trying to hide his own problems from her.
The problem was that Lily knew her son too well, and her son knew her too well. They both felt the other's reticence to share some feelings and events in their respective life. Lily felt a certain frustration growing with Harry, and she shared a part of this frustration. She was frustrated of the growing distance, and even disconnect, that she felt was slowly taking shape between her and Harry.
He was fifteen-years-old now. Fifteen, and nearly half the way to sixteen. Did he really grow up that fast? Lily was feeling and dreading that his childhood was coming to an end. And she was dreading that the time when he would always confide in her was also reaching its end. Her son wouldn't tell her how he truly felt, whether about the war that was approaching because he must have understood by now there was little information she could give him, about his studies because she was now his own teacher, and she even noticed he was sometimes careful in what he told her about his friends, for who she was also a teacher. To such an extent that Lily was beginning to think she should have refused the position when Dumbledore offered it. Though with the problems Umbridge created for students, she didn't dare to imagine what she could have done as a professor. In some way, it made Lily hate Dolores even more, as she was now the main reason why a gap had taken shape between Lily and her son.
Lily thought the gap could not be better represented than by the attitude of someone very close to Harry towards her. His friends were not the problem. In fact, most of Harry's friends seemed to appreciate her, and took her defense against other students who criticized her. Arthur's children were very kind. Professor Flitwick even told her that Fred and George Weasley were less turbulent in her classroom than in any other. Not that it stopped them from being turbulent at all, for they caused at least two explosions in Defence Against the Dark Arts since the year began. And that was when you only accounted for explosions. Lily suspected that a few students who skipped her lessons due to illness got it from the special candies the twins were rumoured to sell. As for Ronald, the latest detention he gave to the son of Goyle was proof enough that he appreciated Lily. And Ginny had always been on good terms with her, ever since the first time Lily met Molly's youngest child at King's Cross. As for Hermione, she once told Lily that she was probably the best teacher in Defence Against the Dark Arts they had so far. She often remained behind after a lesson to ask further questions to Lily about the subjects they just studied. His Quidditch comrades were also very decent and respectful, while Lily felt she developed kind of a special bond with Cho Chang, probably because of the compassion she felt for this girl who lost the boy she loved when Lily's son had survived the same ordeal. But it wasn't the behaviour of any of Harry's friends that bothered, not even those who seemed a little cold towards her, and who Harry told her believed the Daily Prophet. No. It was the behaviour of her son's girlfriend that left an odd feeling to Lily.
Lily didn't think she was prepared for the time when Harry would begin dating girls. She should have. After all, he was in the age for that. It was bound to happen. Only, it seemed to happen so suddenly, and at a time when Lily was simply absent from her son's life. She wished that she had been there when it happened, that she could have gotten to know the girl Harry fell in love with.
She didn't think she missed much with the first girl Harry dated over a year ago. Lily didn't know Parvati Patil personally, but being her teacher for nearly four months and being an acquaintance of her parents, Lily thought she was able to have a relatively informed opinion on this girl. To be honest, she wasn't very impressed. Lily had met girls of the same sort when she was a student. They were not evil, not even bad by nature, but they had a tendency to not take things seriously. Like Lily saw Parvati do it often in her classroom along with her best friend, Lavender Brown, these girls would read magazines under their desks during lessons, fake illness to not attend classroom, find excuses to not give their homework in time, gossip about everyone, and laugh about everything that happened, whether it was funny or not. Not really the kind of people Lily appreciated to spend time with when she was a student, nor the kind of student she liked to have as a teacher. The girl was not without qualities either, from what she knew. Lily witnessed her taking the defense of another student who was unjustly blamed for making their homework fail by his friend, and she was able to perform feats of magic when it came to defending herself. The girl had not been sent to Gryffindor by mistake. However, Lily saw very few common points between her and Harry. Considering the very short time their relationship lasted, she suspected it hadn't been really serious.
With Susan Bones, however, it was different. Lily didn't know the girl personally, but having known very well her uncle back when he was in the Order, and her aunt when Lily worked for her, she had the impression that Susan was everything but someone to fear. And Lily's impressions she had of Susan since she began to teach Amelia's niece were quite positive. She was a very good student. Maybe not as good as Hermione was, but not that far behind. Lily surprised the two girls studying together more than once. She took her studies seriously, respected both teachers and other students, even those from Slytherin, and was very kind. Lily sometimes had the impression to see a model of what someone expected from a Hufflepuff student when she looked at Susan.
But Susan kept her distances with Lily. She didn't think the girl ever asked her a single question since the beginning of the year. Lily suspected the girl might be intimidated by her. She regretted it, for she would have liked to know Susan better. At the same time, Lily couldn't blame her. How could a girl get to befriend the mother of her boyfriend when the said mother was also her teacher? Not to mention that Lily was well aware that some people were afraid of talking to her. For many, after all, she remained the Mother-Who-Lived.
Lily had no reason to believe that Susan had any sort of bad influence on Harry. Truth be told, from the little she knew about the girl, Lily was glad that Harry dated someone like her. Lily supposed that she just wished she could be a normal mother, again. But it seemed that for now, she couldn't. She sighed as she walked into the classroom. In about ten minutes, students would start to arrive. She had to set her mind on the lessons she was about to give, the last ones these students would receive before most of them returned to their families for Christmas.
Lily's last afternoon of teaching in the year 1995 was spent under the surveillance of Dolores Jane Umbridge. The High Inquisitor remained in her corner, taking notes. Lily had noticed a long time ago how this woman purposefully wrote in a very loud manner, to make her presence known, and possibly to disturb the people she was watching. However, Lily had grown accustomed to it. She was probably the most watched teacher of the school. Umbridge attended more of her lessons than any other teacher, even Trelawney who was on probation.
Lily supposed she shouldn't be surprised. Sybill Trelawney was probably the one teacher anyone from the outside would believe had no place at all at Hogwarts. People could say what they wanted about a ghost providing the lessons of History of Magic, or a half-giant teaching Care of Magical Creatures, but when it came to Trelawney, it was obvious to anyone who spent a few minutes with her that she had no capacity to see the future, at least no capacity Trelawney herself was aware of, but also that her subject was close to useless. Even Minerva McGonagall, who usually showed the utmost respect to all her colleagues including Snape, struggled to hide her disdain for Divination, and her lack of trust in Trelawney.
But the truth was that Lily was surprised. She expected to be the one put on probation. In fact, she should be. Umbridge had tried to put her on probation from the very beginning. But the committee in charge of reviewing the findings of the High Inquisitor had opposed this move. Lily was even called to answer their questions on two occasions since the term began, and each time, the committee concluded there wasn't enough cause to put her on probation. Or more accurately, some members of the committee, especially the governors of the school, opposed this. Lily even knew some of them. Apparently, one of her strongest supports had been Madhari Patil, who happened to live at the Abandoned Tower as well. Lily was in fact surprised when she found out she was one of the governors to block any attempt by Umbridge to remove Lily from her position. After all, she was among the parents who almost accused Harry in his second year, when the Basilisk attacked students. She also happened to be the mother of Harry's first girlfriend with who he broke up. According to Dumbledore though, Madhari Patil and the other members of the Board of Governors all believed him when it came to Voldemort's return. Dumbledore had met them privately not long after his return, and none of them doubted his word. This meant that a Board of Governors entirely supportive of Dumbledore stopped Fudge and his minions from doing everything they wanted with the school. But not everything.
It seemed that as a way to calm down Fudge and to not make the Board an enemy of him, the governors accepted to put Trelawney on probation. Some thought, even before Umbridge's arrival, that the Divination teacher had no place in Hogwarts. Divination was already viewed barely as a worthy discipline, and Trelawney did nothing to improve the position's reputation. Maybe she shouldn't be surprised, but when Fudge created the office of High Inquisitor, Lily was certain that she would be the first one to be put on probation, and the first one to be sacked eventually. Now it seemed that someone else would take the fall, and the fact it was Trelawney didn't make her feel any better.
Lily feared what might happen if Trelawney was sacked. After all, she was the woman who made the prophecy concerning Harry. Her gift of seeing the future, although it rarely manifested, was real. What would happen if Voldemort or one of his supporters managed to seize the woman who made the prophecy on Harry? They couldn't let Trelawney leave Hogwarts. Back when Severus was still working for Voldemort, he told him not only about the prophecy, but also about who said it and to who. Voldemort knew that somewhere in Trelawney's mind, the prophecy he was desperately looking for was hidden. At this stage, Lily would prefer being sacked herself rather than see Trelawney on the loose and vulnerable.
The bell rang. Unsurprisingly, all the students rushed out. Classes were over for them until at least two good weeks.
"Don't forget the homework I gave you," she warned, her voice barely making it over the chaos of students struggling to leave the classroom all at the same time. "I want to see it on my desk when you return."
More slowly than they would have liked, her students made it out of the classroom. Lily watched them leaving quietly. A few of them wished her a merry Christmas. She put some order in her papers over her desk as they left. When the last one was gone, she heard the characteristic cough she despised so much.
"The students are running away from her the moment they get a chance," the very acute voice whispered, in a way that was obviously meant to be heard.
"Is that going to be in your next report?" Lily asked Dolores, mocking. "You believe the forty-sixth will work better than the forty-fifth?"
Smiling sweetly, Umbridge stood up. "Merry Christmas, Lily. Hopefully, we will see each other again in January."
That woman left on that, to Lily's relief. She may get used to her presence, but that didn't make such presence enjoyable in the least. And like every time Umbridge feigned being kind, Lily and everyone else could see through the mask she tried to put on. Lily was sure that if Umbridge had her way, she would be removed from office before the end of the holidays.
Lily wasn't entirely sure what to feel at the prospect of being fired. The truth was that she had come to love her new job. Despite the negative and nasty behaviour of some students, most of them liked her, and she liked them in return. She enjoyed teaching them. Not only she found herself useful in preparing them for what was waiting in the outside world, but she had come to enjoy the mere fact of teaching. She also had good relations with the other teachers, even if many had taught her back when she was a student herself. In fact, most were more than happy after a few months to have Lily as a colleague. She even managed to get along with Severus.
Even if an irreducible part of herself would never be able to forgive Severus the role he played in her husband's death and all the hardships this brought on Harry, Lily had to admit that Severus was making efforts. His behaviour this term with Draco Malfoy and his other students who used heinous language towards her showed he regretted his former beliefs. Not to mention the way he was endangering himself every day by spying on Voldemort. And after he tried to save Harry, and actually saved him on at least one occasion from Pettigrew, Lily was forced to acknowledge that he no longer was the young man who followed Voldemort. Still, their relationship remained complicated. Severus never apologized. A part of Lily wanted to believe that he preferred showing that he changed through actions rather than words. As a result, they managed to have a working, if not cordial relationship as colleagues. Still, he seemed to jump on any opportunity to punish and humiliate Harry for no reason. Even if Harry didn't tell her all the details, it wasn't hard to find out that Snape treated him differently from all other students, in the wrong sense. At least, he didn't give him disciplinary sanction, preventing Umbridge from using her authority on Lily's son.
However, even though Lily had come to enjoy teaching, she couldn't deny that it prevented her from filling other duties for the Order. Dumbledore kept assuring her that preparing the young wizards for the upcoming fight was already a lot, Lily felt somewhat useless. She barely worked to find Crouch Junior, her duty as professor mobilizing most of her time. She still managed to give a hand to Miranda Savage, but their investigation progressed slowly. Last month, they had found a hideout where Crouch Junior had taken refuge, near Newgrange, in Ireland. Lily and Miranda were even sure that Voldemort himself lived in that place for a time, but the place was empty when they searched it. Lily couldn't help but think they might have already caught Crouch if she had more time to dedicate to his hunt.
As a result, Lily thought there might not be only negative aspects to being fired. Not to mention that it would ensure a peaceful departure from Hogwarts, unlike her predecessors who almost all seemed to suffer cruel fates. Only, that would certainly mean that her successor would be chosen by the Ministry. This meant someone at least incompetent to teach students how to defend themselves. This was not a prospect she looked forward to. Not to mention this meant losing access to Harry for most of the year. Even with the gap that took shape between them, Lily liked to be able to see and watch her son on a daily basis. She wasn't ready to relinquish this.
Lily shortly went back to her office to put back into place everything she owned that she had in her classroom. She wouldn't see the classroom before January. If she worked, it wouldn't be there. But she quickly made her way to the Great Hall where dinner was waiting for her.
The atmosphere was quite festive in the Great Hall. The term was over. Even among teachers, the mood was quite light. Everyone was happy due to the fast approaching winter holidays. Even the presence of Umbridge, who may be seeking a last opportunity to gather negative facts about the teachers she was evaluating, or a last chance to further punish a student, couldn't manage to darken the light atmosphere.
"Not unhappy that the term is over, I suppose, Lily," Professor Flitwick said on her right.
"I will not refuse some time off," she replied, cutting another piece of steak.
"That's normal. Especially when you begin. I can still remember my first term as professor here. Although it happened a long time ago."
Flitwick went to describe in details all the challenges he faced as a new Professor of Charms a very long time ago. It was long before Lily studied at Hogwarts. Back when she was a student, she had not fully realized how old some of her professors were. It was probably due to her childhood in a Muggle family. For a very long time, her mind had continued to view the world as if people reaching a century of age were exceptional occurrences. And it was only today, as she was now their colleague and they told her stories they would never share with their students, that Lily fully realized how long and full their lives had been.
In the middle of Lily's conversation with Flitwick, McGonagall jumped in, asking her what she retained from her first term, and giving her advice on how to prepare and approach teaching for the next term. Eventually though, the conversation turned to the topic of the Christmas holidays themselves, which Lily was careful to only broach in whispers after ensuring that Umbridge was far away and totally unable to hear anything they would say.
"What have you planned for the holidays, Minerva?" Lily asked her.
"Nothing particularly special," the Transfiguration teacher answered. "That is, nothing very different from previous years. There are a few students who remain at Hogwarts during the holidays. I'll stay here and watch over them. You will not believe how much more surveillance they need when there are only a few of them in an empty school." McGonagall then lowered her voice even further. "Everything is planned for you and Harry?"
"Yes," Lily replied. "Though I find it a little cruel to hide him the truth."
"I think he will relish more than enough when he finds out the truth tomorrow to make up for ill feeling he might have had for the past few days." McGonagall then took an even more serious expression. "Enjoy the time with your son, Lily. These moments go away faster than we all think."
Lily wondered if McGonagall was referring to the prospect of people dying soon because of Voldemort's return, but there was something else in her eyes that gave the impression it was a more personal note. But Umbridge came back roaming around the staff table at this moment, and the women went back to discussing trivial matters.
During dinner, Lily kept shooting glances towards Harry. He seemed to have fun with his friends. All were surely relieved that this first half of the year was over. She noticed how Arthur's youngest son, Ronald, looked particularly joyful. She suspected he was very proud of outsmarting Umbridge. Lily supposed they couldn't blame him. She herself felt great joy whenever Umbridge was humiliated. She only hoped that this short-term victory wouldn't come at too much of a cost in the long term.
Many students took their time dining in the Great Hall. None of them, except for a few zealous like Hermione, would complete homework tonight. They had no need to rush to the library, which would be quite empty in this last day of the term. A few rushed to their dormitory still, probably in a hurry to prepare their baggage for tomorrow, when they would head for their family's home aboard the Hogwarts Express. Among these students, there would be all of Harry's friends and his girlfriend. But Harry wouldn't be with them.
Later that evening, Lily was in her office, putting some order into her files, while gathering others that wouldn't stay at Hogwarts during the holidays. It was quite late when someone knocked at her door. She recognized the distinctive tempo of the knocking instantly.
"Come in," she yelled. The door opened and Harry walked in.
"Still working?" he asked. "This evening?"
"You mean even Hermione is taking a break?" she shot back.
Harry looked uncertain for a moment. "I think so. Yes, she is. She's not working tonight." Still, Lily didn't miss the uncertainty Harry had about the matter.
"Don't forget to congratulate her. This must be quite a feat for her."
They both laughed.
"But seriously, Mom, are you still working?" he asked, insisting.
"Not really. Only reorganizing a few things. I'll probably head to bed soon." She looked at her watch. "You too should go to sleep pretty soon. It's almost the hour." Harry would have to leave very soon.
"Yes, I know. But Ron is probably beating Hermione at chess as I speak. For once, I wasn't interested in seeing him win again." His expression turned apprehensive then. "I heard Goyle got his detention finally."
This was dangerous grounds. Lily couldn't behave solely as the mother here. So she gave an answer she hoped both a mother and a teacher could give. "As prefect, your friend can give detentions. And the violation of rules was accurate."
"So Umbridge didn't get what she wanted," Harry concluded, obviously smiling in contentment.
"The High Inquisitor has no authority over detentions given by prefects. Their decree is very specific. It only covers discipline by professors and other staff members. It's probably too specific for its own good," she added with a wicked smile. Harry obviously shared her satisfaction over what happened. However, as the adult in the room, she had to remind of the hard reality. "At least, it is too specific for now," she added on a more ominous tone.
Harry's smile faded progressively as reality seemed to sink in.
"So you believe you too that Umbridge is going to adopt another decree to correct that?"
"If you were Umbridge, what would you do?" she asked as a reply.
Harry sighed and dropped himself into a chair. Lily sat down as well. "Hermione told Ron this was going to happen almost right after he gave his detention to Goyle," he said on a sour tone.
"Clever as always, Hermione," Lily commented.
"And Susan was close to beating her at saying it first, this time," her son added.
"Well, her aunt is working with laws on a daily basis."
"I know. She's my girlfriend, remember."
"I know, Harry."
She tried to not consider he told her this as if she still ignored that he and Susan were dating. Maybe she gave them the wrong impression those last few months. So she changed the subject.
"You must be glad that the term is over."
"Yes. Was the year of your O.W.L.s so difficult?"
"It was hard," she confirmed. "Believe me, those who are Prefects right now are wishing someone else was chosen."
"I know. If it wasn't for the pleasure of giving a detention to Malfoy's friends, I think Ron would already have given up."
She was glad that whatever disappointment Harry had felt for not being chosen Prefect, it was long gone. "I hope he's not really only remaining Prefect for this reason."
"No, I don't think so," he replied. Then he smiled more broadly. "Maybe it's to wear the badge."
They laughed together a good fit.
"He's going back home for the holidays, you know?"
"Yes, I know," she replied, trying to sound indifferent.
"And Hermione will go skiing with her parents."
"Do you know where they will go?"
"I don't know. I think she said it was somewhere in France. I don't remember the name."
His expression was no longer very joyful. Lily thought she had an idea of what was coming.
"We really have to stay at Hogwarts this year?"
"I'm afraid so, Harry," she lied.
She now wondered if it was really a good idea to hide him the truth. For the truth was that they were both going to the Burrow during the holidays. They would wait tomorrow morning, not long after the students left the castle for the Hogwarts Express, to leave the school grounds, heading to Hogsmeade with the pretext of visiting the village. There, they would Apparate to the Burrow and spend the remainder of the holidays there. They wanted to take by surprise both people of the Ministry and the Death Eaters by leaving unannounced and without warning. However, to maintain the surprise, it was decided that no one among the children would be aware of their plans. So neither Harry, nor any of Arthur's and Molly's children, were made aware, and they convinced Harry that he would be forced to spend the holidays at Hogwarts for his own safety. Lily somewhat regretted it now. Yes, she was sure that Harry would be extremely pleased by the surprise tomorrow when she would tell him where they were heading. But in the meantime, her son had a sour mood, getting the impression he would spend both Christmas and the New Year far from his friends, and possibly far from his mother. Lily suspected he thought she would spend the holidays working, preparing the next term. He was only half-right. She would have to work, but she also intended to enjoy the holidays. But for the time being, she had to stick to the plan.
"Look, I know this is not what you want, but Dumbledore believes…" Her son didn't let her finish.
"Yes, I know. This is better for my safety."
"There are worse places to spend Christmas and the New Year," she noted.
"Yes, I guess. Though if Umbridge is around, I don't think it's going to be as pleasing as it could be."
That was one of the reasons why they wanted to bring Harry out of Hogwarts, and also why they hid the truth about where he would spend the Christmas holidays. Umbridge was among the people they wanted to fool.
"I will not let her ruin your Christmas, Harry. You have my word. And Dumbledore will not allow it either."
"I guess," he said, almost snorting, clearly not believing it. "Dumbledore doesn't seem to notice I exist recently."
"It's not true, Harry," Lily assured him.
"Well, that's the impression he gives. He didn't even want to look at me at my disciplinary hearing. And he always seems to avoid me whenever we cross paths."
"He's very busy right now, between the Order, the propaganda of the Ministry, on top of his headmaster's duties."
"I'm not asking him to invite me in his office every week. But he could at least acknowledge that I'm here," he retorted, almost angry.
"He knows you're here, Harry. He's very aware of that." She sighed. "The truth is, I believe he's overtaken by recent events. With Voldemort's return and everything… I believe he doesn't know what to do. Even Dumbledore can feel overwhelmed with everything that's going on. I suspect he wants to give the impression you're not close, even to the Ministry and Umbridge, perhaps in the hope that they will leave you alone."
"Well, it's useless. And it doesn't work anyway," he replied dryly.
"I know. I'm not saying this is the right thing to do," Lily tried to say. "But maybe in Dumbledore's mind, it is, as strange as it may seem. You have to admit that he has foolish ideas, sometimes," she tried to joke.
She briefly saw the shadow of a smile on her son's face, but it was gone instantly. She looked at her watch. It was almost the hour.
"Look, it's late. I think both of us would benefit from a good night of sleep."
"Alright," he said, standing up. "Will I see you tomorrow?"
"Of course. You can come and see me whenever you want during the holidays. I'll always be there for you, Harry."
"Thank you, Mom," he said half-heartedly.
"Hey, wait."
He barely stopped, but it was long enough for her to stand up as well and ruffle his hair one more time.
Both laughed shortly at the gesture, and Harry left. Although Lily couldn't see from his back, she could tell he was smiling while leaving.
After Harry was gone, Lily waited patiently for the right moment. Then she opened the door of her office. There was no one in the corridor. She locked the door behind her and headed towards the Entrance Hall. At this hour, corridors were almost empty. Aside from Filch, Lily didn't cross the path of anybody. The caretaker looked at her with suspicion, like always.
Lily had noticed how Argus Filch had a complicated relationship with professors, especially the younger ones. It was probably because the latter had been students when Filch was already caretaker. As such, Lily felt that Filch viewed people like her as threats rather than allies. He had a better relationship with Snape, unless when it came to punish Slytherins. As for more ancient teachers, he was more respectful towards them, and this respect reached its peak with Dumbledore. Filch may be unhappy that Dumbledore didn't let him punish students as he saw fit, the headmaster remained the man who gave him his job, making Filch very loyal to Dumbledore. Though Lily worryingly saw him getting closer to Umbridge recently. It was even rumoured that Filch gave her information about both students and professors, helping that woman with her own application of discipline.
Despite this lack of trust, he didn't stop Lily, who made it to the courtyard without opposition. She had lied to Harry about something else. She wasn't going to bed. She was going to Hogsmeade.
In the village, Lily behaved as if she was a normal customer, visiting various shops, buying a few things there, while leaving the others without a single purchase, making the owners unhappy. She behaved as if she was buying stuff for Christmas. But this wasn't the real objective of her visit to Hogsmeade. Her true destination was at the Three Broomsticks, where she went to drink a Butterbeer. When she was sure that no one had followed her, she went to the washroom, entered a cabin, put her feet into the basin, and flushed it. In an instant, she was moved into a dark room, something resembling a cave. She didn't know where in Hogsmeade it was, but Miranda Savage was waiting for her.
"Just in time," the senior Auror commented. "Well, let's get to work."
It wasn't the first time that the current and former Aurors met at Hogsmeade. It had happened four times since Lily began working at Hogwarts. They were always careful for people, especially those from the Ministry, to not notice those meetings. Under the light of a single candle, Miranda unrolled a map of the United Kingdom, with several checks and crosses of various colours on it. These were the places where they suspected Barty Crouch Junior to be, to have been, those they knew for sure he had visited, and even those they suspected he might use in the future. They only inspected a few of them.
"I'm afraid there's not much new since the last time we met," Miranda said. "We're still nowhere close to catching him."
"We're making progress though. We have a much better idea of where he hides than last year."
"Maybe, but the real good news will only come when we finally catch him. And right now, according to the most recent intelligence I received, he's most likely out of the country."
Lily frowned. "I thought most information we received about that was unreliable."
"This time, it is. The father believes so as well. Some contacts of Mr Crouch indicate very clearly that his son is hiding either in Corsica or in the Balearic Islands."
"So we're back to square one," Lily muttered, discouraged.
"I'm afraid so. I might not have as much intelligence on Voldemort's plans as you and your friends, but I suspect he sent this servant far away to not attract attention. He probably doesn't need him in England anyway. He's got loads of supporters who operate openly because the Minister open the gates wide for them."
Miranda said the last words in spite. Over the past few months, Lily noticed how more frustrated Miranda had become about Fudge's policy. Lily had gone so far as to offer her to join the Order of the Phoenix, but unlike Kingsley or Tonks, the senior Auror refused. Lily suspected that Miranda considered the Order was doing a job that the Ministry should be doing. Her former mentor had quite negative views about secret organizations. Every time she asked Lily for information that the Order might have, the tone in her voice spoke volumes about what she thought of the Order, or rather about the fact such an organization needed to exist. Yes, despite refusing to join the ranks, Miranda didn't refuse help from the Order either, essentially the information it could provide.
"That would be logical," Lily said. "To what degree can we be sure that he is in one of these locations?"
"High uncertainty, like always. But these are the best leads we have right now. And I cannot follow them."
Lily frowned once more. "Why?"
"The Ministry wouldn't let me chase down Crouch Junior within our own territory. Do you think they will grant me permission to chase him in another country?"
Lily had to acknowledge it was true. "There must be a way to justify a visit in Spain or France."
"Not in the current context. Since the fiascos of the Quidditch World Cup and the Triwizard Tournament, our Ministry is no longer invited in many countries. Many have reduced diplomatic visits and cooperation programs with us. Especially France. Fleur Delacour was attacked during the third task, and she was a French citizen. As for Spain, many of their young wizards go to Beauxbatons, so they're not much more cooperative. And on top of that, since the events of June and Dumbledore's speech in front of the entire International Confederation, Fudge controls very closely interactions between his Ministry and others. He doesn't prevent regular citizens from going into other countries, but all employees are on high scrutiny. Including myself. Only a few people he trusts entirely, essentially members of his own staff, can meet foreign dignitaries, either at home or in another country. And those who visit Great Britain or Ireland have their itinerary closely watched and curtailed, to reduce their exposure to anyone or any information that might contradict the Ministry's position about Voldemort. So right now, the chances for an Auror to be sent to Spain or France on official business is nonexistent, but even if I was to go there for personal reasons, my activities would be heavily scrutinized, and I might compromise the whole secret investigation."
Lily thought she saw the problem now. Miranda could simply not go in foreign lands. Even if she did, she might be followed by people of the Ministry, and this would make any effort to find Crouch Junior useless.
"Although I cannot go on these islands, you can," Savage said.
"Me?" Lily asked.
"Yes. The Ministry cannot control you. You're no longer an employee. They can watch you like they want, but they cannot forbid you from leaving the country since you never committed any crime."
Lily saw the logic, but there was one major problem to this approach. "How long would it take to find Crouch on either of these islands, assuming he's there?"
"Impossible to tell," Miranda stated as fact.
"I don't know if you've realized it, Miranda, but I'm teaching now. I cannot go on extended leave, and I doubt that the winter holidays will give me enough time to find Crouch."
"Then we should find a way," Savage retorted harshly. "Because we got to catch this man. You know it better than anyone else. So if you can't go, someone must." She stared at Lily. "Maybe a friend of yours could do that."
There was no mistaking the reluctance from Miranda asking this. She wasn't happy about this, but she would do what was necessary to catch Crouch Junior.
"I'll see what I can do," Lily promised.
"Better be. In the meantime, I can give the most likely locations on these islands where this criminal might be hiding."
They spent the next hour discussing the specific place where Bartemius Crouch Junior might be hiding either in Corsica or in the Balearic Islands. Miranda's harsh tone when she had to request help from the Order turned more professional through this time, no longer hostile. Lily wished that some people didn't view the Order as some kind of illegal organization that shouldn't even exist. They might be partially right. Officially, it was the Ministry's job to ensure public safety and to fight threats like Voldemort. But when the Ministry refused to do its duty, when it ignored threats, especially existential ones, someone had to step in and do the job in its place. This is what the Order was doing. Not to mention that no matter how people like Miranda may not like it, even if the Ministry was doing its utmost to fight the threat, it wouldn't be enough. Not against Voldemort.
They were trying to determine the likelihood of Crouch Junior hiding on top of another very specific mountain in Corsica (there were a lot on this island) when the fireplace erupted in green flames. Lily had not even noticed the fireplace, given the surrounding darkness. Out of it came a small globe.
"Accio!"
Miranda called, and the globe flew in her direction. She placed it close to her ear. She blinked, as if she was listening to something. She then took away the globe, pointed her wand at it, and the globe disappeared.
"I must leave," Savage declared. "My presence is urgently required at the Ministry."
"Something happened?" Lily asked her.
"I'm afraid I can't tell. Ministry's business. Go back to Hogwarts, Lily. And don't forget. Find someone to search in Corsica and the Balearic Islands."
And the instant after that, having gathered all the documents she brought, Miranda Savage disappeared in a puff of Floo powder. Lily left the place an instant later, reappearing in the washrooms of the Three Broomsticks.
While leaving the inn, Lily was again careful to avoid attracting unwanted attention. She had to look like a common customer. She got out of the place without anyone seeming to notice. Outside, it was pitch dark. They were now in the middle of the night. Lily followed the path leading from Hogsmeade to Hogwarts, a bag containing everything she bought earlier tonight swinging as she made her way to the castle, thinking about everything she and Miranda just discussed. She would have to see with Dumbledore if they could dispatch someone to look for Crouch Junior in those locations.
Lily didn't see herself going there. She was way too watched and recognizable anyway. And even without that, she was teaching at Hogwarts now. Who would replace her if she left, even for only a few days? Umbridge and the Ministry would jump on the opportunity to remove her if they could. Not to mention that Lily wanted to spend some time with Harry for Christmas. It was high time she had some quality time with her son.
She walked through the gates, and as she approached the Entrance Hall, she saw someone with a torch heading her way. It didn't take much time for her to recognize Severus. She was going to salute him, but he beat her to speak first.
"Dumbledore wishes to see you, right now."
"What is it about?"
"He didn't deem it important to tell me. He only said it was urgent."
Wondering, Lily headed in the direction of Dumbledore's office. Only, Severus followed her, hanging the torch to a wall on their way.
"He asked that you be there?" she asked her colleague.
"It may be better that I come. He asked that we avoid Umbridge at all costs," he explained in a very low tone.
"Then that must be serious." It meant that it concerned either something important about the school, or it was about the Order's business.
"What are you planning to do during the winter holidays?" she asked, trying to make the conversation.
"Nothing you would find interesting," he replied, not kindly, but neither with hostility, on a totally neutral tone, indicating he didn't want to discuss the matter further. But the subject he broached after that surprised Lily. "You should be careful around the Slytherins from now on."
"You're warning me against your own students?" she asked, making the irony of the situation plain in her voice.
"Thanks to the stupidity of your son's best friend, the Ministry will make it known very soon that he can do whatever he wants with discipline. So don't expect me to have much control over Mr Malfoy and his friends in the foreseeable future."
She couldn't resist sending him an acute reply. "Perhaps you could try to make them understand this is no good to treat other people differently because of their birth. You would have benefited from it if someone had told you this at the same age."
For a long moment, he didn't answer. But he did after a while. "Do you really think I never told him and every other student in my house?" She looked back at him, a little surprise, she had to admit it. "Or that no one ever told me either? If that's the case, you have a very bad memory, Lily Evans."
Somehow, the rebuke caused her some shame. And indeed, Severus was right. She was the one who told him birth and origins didn't matter. And at the beginning, it was to reassure him because he felt inferior due to who his father was.
"It takes more than words to change this kind of prejudice," he concluded.
Severus said nothing more for the remainder of the way to Dumbledore's office.
Once in front of the gargoyle, she gave the password, and they both climbed the stairs. Dumbledore was waiting for them behind his desk. He looked at them, and immediately Lily knew this was something serious. For Dumbledore didn't welcome them with a smile. Instead, his grave expression revealed the gravity of the situation.
"I'm glad we could finally find you, Lily. We have been looking for you all around the castle."
"I was at Hogsmeade. Meeting with Miranda Savage."
"Ah. That explains. I figured you had to be in the village. I only didn't know why."
"Do you want my report on this meeting?"
"Not now. We have more pressing matters. Arthur was attacked."
This stopped Lily's heart right away. "Attacked? By who? When?"
"Tonight. About an hour ago. In the Ministry. He was on guard duty."
He didn't need to specify what Arthur was guarding. "A Death Eater? Or…" For once, she didn't dare to say his name. For if that was him, if Voldemort had tried to enter the Department of Mysteries, then in all likelihood, Arthur was… She didn't dare to complete the thought.
"We don't know yet. He's been carried away to St Mungo's."
So this meant he was still alive. At least, he was when they found him.
"Is he still…?"
"Yes, he's alive," Dumbledore said, reassuring Lily in an instant. "He was bitten by a particularly venomous snake. The Healers are taking care of him right now. Though he's not out of the woods."
"Has Molly been warned?"
"Yes. She must already be at St Mungo's. And although we all pray that Arthur will get out alive, there is another reason why I made you come here, Lily. It's about Harry."
Lily couldn't have been more surprised… and worried. "What? What happened to Harry?"
Dumbledore looked tired as he talked, and something told Lily this wasn't because it was already late in the night. "Harry is the reason why we were informed that Arthur was assaulted, and probably the reason why Arthur is still breathing right now."
"What do you mean?"
Dumbledore looked straight into her eyes. "He had a vision."
Lily was stunned for a moment. Such a long moment that Severus was the next to speak. "I never heard that Potter had visions."
This comment seemed to bring her back to life. "Do you mean like the one he had last year?" she asked. "When he saw Voldemort discuss with Barty Crouch Junior?"
"About it," Dumbledore confirmed.
"It seems there are things I ignore," Severus declared.
"Because we had no reason to tell you, Severus. And because it was better if as few people as possible knew. I'll tell you all the details later but for now, Lily, you must know that Harry woke up his comrades a little more than an hour ago. He wasn't feeling well, so they called the Professor McGonagall. Harry told her Arthur was in danger, so she brought him here, and he told me that he saw Arthur being attacked by a giant snake. So I took my dispositions so Arthur may be found and brought to St Mungo's. And he was found just in time. Without this vision of Harry, Arthur may be dead."
That was a lot to take in at the same time. So Lily asked the first thing that came to her mind. "Where is Harry right now?"
"He is at Grimmauld Place," Dumbledore informed her. "I sent him there with all the Weasley children. They will be closer to St Mungo's this way. And far away from Dolores Umbridge too. When they left, she was about to barge into my office."
"Thank you." If there was one thing Harry or any of Arthur's children didn't need right now, it was this harpy on their back. Then Lily noticed something. "Wait. They are at Grimmauld Place? All alone?"
"No, not alone. By chance, Sirius and Remus happened to be there. They'll be watching over them."
Lily sighed inwardly in relief. She wondered whether sometimes she worried too much about Harry.
"Look, Lily. I think that now more than ever, you want to be with your son," Dumbledore said. "And you're right. Harry needs you right now, more than ever."
"I guess," she muttered. Her son must be very shaken after he witnessed the father of one of his best friends getting nearly killed by a snake.
"But there's another reason why you must watch over him tonight, Lily. And also over the following days. There is a very important detail about the attempt on Arthur's life Harry just witnessed. He viewed it as if he was the person who tried to kill Arthur."
Lily wasn't certain about what Dumbledore meant for a moment. "What do you mean?"
"Harry told us that he saw Arthur being attacked. But he didn't witness it from the outside, like for his vision with Crouch Junior last year. I believe he saw it through the eyes of Lord Voldemort himself."
Lily needed some time to digest the information. In the meantime, Severus stood up. "Dumbledore, with all due respect, I think you have some explanations to provide," the Potions teacher said.
"Like I said, Severus, I will explain it all to you. For the moment, the most important is that Lily joins Harry." At the mention of her son's name, she snapped back into reality. Dumbledore's eyes bore on her. "Your son is going to need you, Lily. He just witnessed Arthur being almost killed, and he witnessed it as if he was the one attempting to murder him. But there is more. Because when Harry was in this office, right before I sent them all to Grimmauld Place, I met his eyes, and… It may be hard to explain this, Lily… But I felt something… A shadow of Voldemort behind his eyes…"
Lily's breath was cut short. "That can't be," she muttered.
"I'm afraid that Voldemort is now conscious of the link between him and Harry. He may have felt Harry's presence in his mind tonight when he attacked Arthur. And he's already made attempts to reverse the process."
No, that couldn't be. This was exactly what they wanted to avoid.
"What are we going to do?" she said in a whisper.
"For now, look over Harry. This is the most important thing to do. We cannot leave him alone. Not after everything he went through, and not now that Voldemort is aware of the connection they share. That's why it is very important that you join him, Lily."
Lily suspected that it wasn't only to take care of Harry. It was also to make sure that Voldemort wouldn't enter his mind. Dumbledore wanted to protect the Order. It shattered Lily's heart, but she had to admit that this was a possibility. If Voldemort was now aware of the mental connection he shared with Harry, and that he managed to reverse it, seeing through Harry's mind… Lily was close to tears, but this wasn't the time to cry.
"I must go to Grimmauld Place. Right away," she declared.
"I know," Dumbledore stated. He pointed his wand at an object Lily didn't even bother to look at. "Portus! It will bring you straight to Grimmauld Place. Seize it right now. Severus, you stay here. We have many things to talk about."
"Yes, I can imagine," Severus answered.
But Lily had already seized the random object. And a few moments later, a swirl of colors in a whirlwind engulfed her and carried her to London. Lily landed on a hard floor, slightly tumbling and out of breath. She didn't notice much first, for everything seemed dark.
"Lily?"
She turned, coming face to face with Remus. She now recognized the kitchen of the Twelve, Grimmauld Place.
"I was wondering when Dumbledore would send you," he said, seeming relieved.
Before Lily could ask where her son was, she got her answer.
"Mom?"
Remus slightly moved aside. Harry had just stood up from the table. Ron, Fred, George, Ginny and Sirius were sitting there, a pitcher of Butterbeer in front of each of them. But Lily mostly had eyes for her son, and she moved to stand in front of him.
"Harry, I was just told what happened. Are you alright?"
"Yeah. I think," he said.
Lily was worried not only by the weakness of his voice, but also by the paleness of his face. This was definitely not because of the dim light in the room. She looked at Sirius, who was still sitting. He made a head gesture towards the table.
"We thought it would be better to stay here with them. I don't think many of us will sleep tonight," he explained.
"No, indeed," Lily replied, understanding. She wouldn't sleep either, even if she tried. "You have more news from Arthur?"
"Only that he is at St Mungo's and that Molly is there with him," Remus replied. "We were hoping you would have more information."
"Unfortunately, no." She looked at the four children of Molly and Arthur who were present. "Your father is going to make it."
"We hope," the twins said in chorus, not seeming convinced.
Lily looked back to her son. He seemed totally miserable. But there was also something else on his face. Terror. And this terror didn't seem to come from anything or anyone inside the house.
"Harry, come with me," she said on the kindest tone possible. Lily shot a look to Remus and Sirius. They understood immediately. They were not to be disturbed by anyone. Harry followed her like a robot to one of the rooms on the upper floors.
The moment the door closed, Lily said it.
"Harry, Dumbledore told me that happened." Her son went to sit on a bed, falling heavily, face looking down. "I'm truly sorry for what you went through. I can't even imagine… But you may have saved Arthur. He may be dead right now if you hadn't reported it to Dumbledore."
Harry didn't reply. She decided to not say anything for now. She shouldn't press him. She should wait until he felt like he needed to talk. It may have taken a few minutes, but Harry finally opened up.
"Mom… I was the snake…" The words shocked her. "I was there. I… I felt it."
It took a moment for Lily to understand what Harry may mean. "Harry, my dear… It wasn't you. We believe that the snake was either Voldemort himself, or that he was possessed by Voldemort. That's why you saw all this. It is like last year, when you saw a discussion between Voldemort and Barty Crouch Junior in your dreams."
"But back then, I saw it from the exterior. This time… I was inside the snake… I was the snake… I wanted to attack Mr Weasley…"
"No, Harry. You didn't want to attack him. What you felt were Voldemort's desires to attack him."
"In Dumbledore's office… For a couple of seconds… I thought I was a snake… I felt like one… My scar really hurt when I was looking at Dumbledore… I wanted to attack him!"
So this was it. Dumbledore was right. Voldemort was aware of the connection, and he tried to reverse it. For an instant, a very slim moment, Lily was afraid. Afraid of what Voldemort might see through Harry's eyes right now… afraid of what he might force Harry to do… After all, Voldemort was a very powerful dark wizard. If Harry could see through his mind, then Voldemort might try to force Harry…
But the fear dissipated instantly. All she could see in front of her was her son. Her terrified son.
"I think I'm going mad," he said, desperate.
Lily moved towards her son and took him in her arms, hugging him tightly. He was trembling. She herself was very close to crying. What were they all putting her son through? But this wasn't time to cry again. Reluctantly, she loosened her grip on Harry and moved away a little, then slightly put pressure on his shoulder to make him sit again. He would need to be sitting for what she was about to do.
"We should have told you before," she whispered.
This earned her no reaction from Harry. He kept looking down. Lily summoned a chair from the corner of the room, and she sat on it, facing her son. She may not have Dumbledore's approval, but she felt it was the right thing to do, and that he would approve her. Maybe it was even because of that he sent her. Maybe he felt this would come out better if she was the one to tell Harry. And if she was wrong, if Dumbledore disapproved… then so be it. Harry deserved to know the truth. His well-being depended on it.
"Harry, you remember those dreams you told me about this summer? The ones where you were stuck in front of a closed door?"
"Yeah," he answered after a moment. "I keep having them. I've been having them the whole term. It's always the same door."
This was what she suspected. "Have you ever wondered why you dreamed of the very same door all the time?"
"Yeah, but…" He didn't complete whatever he wanted to say.
"How do you feel in those dreams? About the door?"
"I want to get passed it. It want to see the other side. But I cannot. It's locked. I feel there's something important, something I want on the other side."
His tone of voice began to change, as if he was realizing something. He slightly looked up.
"Harry, you have these dreams because Voldemort thinks about this door all the time. Because there's something behind it that he wants more than everything. And that's why you feel like you have to get through this door in your dreams. You feel the desires of Voldemort when you sleep. Like you did tonight. That's why you felt a desire to attack Arthur, and to attack Dumbledore. These are not your desires. These are from Voldemort."
He now looked up straight at her. She wasn't certain of the feelings his face showed.
"How long have you known that?" he asked.
"Since summer. When you told me about your dreams, and you described the door. I knew which door it was. The Order has been guarding this door since Voldemort came back. That's one of the reasons I was so absent this summer. I was among the people guarding this door."
Harry seemed to be thinking intensively. "The door… Wait… I saw it… In… Tonight… I saw it… Mr Weasley…"
"Arthur must have been on guard duty tonight," Lily confirmed. "There are many people who take turns guarding this place."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Harry asked, slightly angry.
"Because we wanted to avoid what happened tonight."
"What do you mean?"
"When I reported to Dumbledore that you were having dreams of this door, he concluded that, since you had dreams of Voldemort previously, it was possible that since he came back, the kind of link between your minds might have gotten stronger. Dumbledore was afraid that if you became too aware of this link, Voldemort might become aware of it as well. And we believe that tonight, he felt your presence when he attacked Arthur. And that he might try to reverse it. That's why you felt his hatred when you were with Dumbledore."
Harry looked confused. "You mean… Voldemort tried to take control of me?"
"No," she replied immediately "He can't. No more than you can take control of him. You can see through his mind, but nothing more. And he cannot do more either." This may not be entirely true, but she wanted to believe it, and Harry needed to believe it as well. "That's part of the reasons why we haven't told you a lot about the Order. In case Voldemort would try to get information. And this is also why Dumbledore has been so distant with you lately. He didn't want to give Voldemort the impression that you were very close, or that he could get anything from your mind. Dumbledore wanted to give the impression to Voldemort that you were not worth his time. Especially now that he has the Marauder's Map. Imagine what it would look like if Voldemort could see that you Dumbledore met on a regular basis." She sighed. "We were also hoping you wouldn't become aware of the link. If you weren't, then Voldemort was unlikely to become conscious of it."
Harry looked stunned. He didn't say a word for a long time.
"And now… He knows?"
"We think so," she reluctantly confirmed.
"But… But…" He seemed to be panicking. "I… I could be a danger for anybody then!"
"No, Harry. You're not a danger. Whatever the link between you and Voldemort, it is not strong. He wasn't even aware of it until tonight."
"But I wanted to attack Dumbledore in his office!"
"No, you didn't want to," she tried to convince him. "What you felt were Voldemort's desires, not yours. You didn't want to attack Dumbledore. And you didn't attack him."
"And what if I'm the one who attacked Mr Weasley?"
Lily blinked several times in stupor. "What nonsense are you saying?"
"I was there, Mom. What if I was changed into a snake and I attacked him?"
Lily scoffed this time. It was simply absurd. "Harry, you were at Hogwarts, in your bed. You didn't attack Arthur. You saw him being attacked by Voldemort, that's all."
"You weren't there. I was! I… I wanted to hurt him! What if I was there, attacking Mr Weasley, then I reappeared in my bed?"
Lily shook her head. "That's impossible, Harry. Even if it was possible that you could be changed into a snake, which isn't possible by the way, you could never have been moved from this place to Hogwarts in an instant. People simply cannot Apparate in Hogwarts."
"Dobby can. And there are other ways. Fawkes can move from one place to another. How do you know it wasn't me who attacked Mr Weasley?"
Lily was beginning to bed fed up. It was simply absurd, especially for Harry, to think he could have assaulted Arthur.
"You need proof that it wasn't you who attacked Arthur?"
Harry didn't answer immediately. "I don't see how we can prove it."
"I can," she retorted. "Wait here for me."
She stood up, left the room, went down the stairs and back to the kitchen, where she asked Ronald about what happened that night. A few minutes later, she was back into the room at the floor where Harry was, standing tall in front of him.
"Your friend Ronald just told me that he saw you thrashing around in your sleep for at least a minute before you woke up, to use his own words," she announced. "And apparently, your other friends in your dormitory had been seeing you contort for several minutes before. Ronald woke up last, after all of them."
Harry looked stunned by her words.
"So unless you can explain how you were at two places at the same time, Harry, you have to accept that it isn't you who attacked Arthur. Quite the opposite, you saved his life tonight. For if you didn't have this vision, he would certainly be dead as we speak."
This was the truth. No matter what everyone thought, Lily would never allow someone to believe, even less Harry himself, that he had anything to do with the attack Arthur suffered tonight.
"So… it wasn't me?" Harry asked, weakly.
"No. It wasn't you. You saved Arthur, Harry. This is not your fault if you have visions of Voldemort, and you are not responsible for the atrocities he committed, even less this night. Far from it, you prevented him from making another victim."
Harry seemed thoughtful for a very long time. Lily, to her great relief, felt that her son no longer believed he was the one who attacked Arthur.
"What is behind this door? Why does Voldemort want to get through it so much?" he finally asked.
This was a question Lily dreaded. At the same time, it meant that he moved past his belief of being responsible for what happened to Arthur that night. Dumbledore might really not approve what she would say, but given how much Harry knew now…
"A weapon," she answered. "A weapon that would allow Voldemort to be way more powerful than before. That's why we've been guarding this door."
The answer was vague enough. Anyway, she didn't tell Harry anything Voldemort wouldn't know yet. If other members of the Order worried Harry might be a source for Voldemort, Lily could easily dismantle their arguments.
"What weapon?"
"I'm afraid I can't tell you that, my dear. I'm sorry."
He didn't seem pleased, but his face calmed down almost immediately. "There are things Voldemort doesn't know about this weapon?"
She didn't know whether she should feel relieved or worried that Harry understood Voldemort might use him to get information.
"Yes, there are things he ignores. And the worst thing that could happen was if he learned the whole truth about this weapon."
For that was indeed one of Lily's greatest fears.
Again, Lily surviving is not changing everything.
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Next chapter: Amelia