Content Advisory: Implied Depression
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN : BURSTING THE BUBBLE
Elphaba woke up to Fiyero staring at her.
"If I didn't love you so much this would be creepy," she said, reaching over to run her fingers through his hair.
"I have a gift for you."
"Is it my birthday?" Elphaba yawned.
Fiyero chuckled and Elphaba felt him clasp something around her wrist. Elphaba looked down to see a slim, gold toned watch with an oval face. She looked at it curiously as the second-hand ticked away.
"Pretty," she said. "But why?"
"Okay first of all, I don't need any excuse to give the woman I love a gift. But secondly, I used to date this girl who was super into lucid dreaming."
"I'm listening," Elphaba arched her brow.
"She swore by doing these reality checks throughout the day. Little tests to see if she was dreaming or not. The idea was you would get so used to doing it during the day that you'd eventually do it in your dreams too, and when you did, BAM!"
Fiyero clapped for dramatic effect, making Elphaba jump.
"You'd be able to control your dream."
"Did she ever succeed?" Elphaba asked.
"Don't know. Broke up with her before I found out," Fiyero shrugged. Elphaba rolled her eyes. "But one of the tricks was to look at the time, look away, and then look back. If the time stays normal, you're awake. If it changes, then you're dreaming."
Amused, Elphaba humored him by glancing at the watch, looking away, and then looking back. She held the watch face out for Fiyero to see.
"I'm awake," she reported.
"About time too. Look how late you slept in!" Fiyero grinned, moving her wrist back to see the watch. "You're so lazy."
Elphaba chuckled and tapped her lips with her forefinger, beckoning for Fiyero to kiss her. He sweetly obliged.
"Thank you, Yero," Elphaba asked as Fiyero turned on his side and placed a hand over her stomach. "What inspired all this?"
"I know these nightmares have been stressing you out," Fiyero said, brushing his thumb back and forth over her belly. "I just figured this way you might feel some more control over them."
"The gift of control…" Elphaba sighed wistfully. "You do know me well."
Elphaba dressed and the pair went downstairs to find Glinda already waiting for them.
"Why, Elphie!" Glinda gasped. "Look at you. You're positively glowing."
"That's just my phosphorescence," Elphaba said smartly, greeting Glinda with a kiss on the cheek. "Remember?"
"How you do hold a grudge," Glinda scoffed. "Let me see you."
Elphaba stepped back and turned to the side, smoothing her hands over her dress to show off her bump to Glinda.
"Every morning I think I can't possibly get any bigger. And then I do."
"Well you're only thirty weeks," Glinda said. "You've still got an awfully long way to go."
"Not awfully long—"
"He's a cabbage this week, Elphie!" Glinda moved along brightly. "Did you know that? A cute little cabbage."
"Let's hope in size only," Elphaba said. "Not in color."
"Oh, Elphie. You needn't stress about little details like that!"
"That's what I've been telling her," Fiyero said, draping an arm over Elphaba's shoulder.
"The baby's color is a pretty big detail."
"Look, Elphie!" Glinda gushed. "I brought you a jar of custard, just like you asked."
Elphaba accepted the jar and spoon with a sigh, understanding that she wasn't going to get anywhere with them. As usual. So she sat on the sofa, propped her legs up in Fiyero's lap, and began eating custard from the jar as Glinda and Fiyero planned the baby's future.
"Of course I had a million and one name ideas for a baby girl, but you two had to go and have a boy," Glinda rolled her eyes, pulling out a baby name book she'd brought with her.
"What were some of your favorites?" Fiyero asked.
"So many! But my favorite had to be…" Glinda did a drum roll on her knees before presenting the name with a flourishing gesture. "Galinda."
Elphaba looked over at Glinda.
"You wanted to name the baby after yourself?"
"Of course not, silly!" Glinda laughed her off. "My name's Glinda."
"My mistake."
"I suppose it'd be cliché to name him after his father?" Glinda wrinkled her nose.
"Wow, tell me how you really feel, Glinda," Fiyero teased, absent-mindedly rubbing Elphaba's swollen ankles.
"I wouldn't mind it," Elphaba said.
"Fiyero Junior?" Fiyero raised his eyebrows. "That's what you'd go with?"
"Why not?" Elphaba said. "It's a fine name and a fine man to be named for."
"I'm touched, Fae," Fiyero said. He meant it.
"Plus it's not like there are any other men we know who'd make worthy namesakes," Elphaba continued. "It's just a pity that we can't."
Glinda and Fiyero exchanged a confused look.
"Can't what?" Fiyero asked.
"Name the baby Fiyero."
"Why not?" Glinda cocked her head to the side.
"Isn't it obvious? We can't call him Fiyero Junior when Fiyero Senior is public enemy number two. We'd be painting a target on his back."
A brief silence fell between them.
Glinda recovered first.
"Well, no matter! There are plenty of marvelous names out there!" she smiled brightly. "We just need to keep brainstorming."
"Yes," Elphaba sighed tiredly. " That's what we need to brainstorm."
Later in the afternoon Fiyero fell asleep on the sofa to Elphaba and Glinda's chagrin.
"Do you want the loveseat?" Glinda offered.
"No, I think I'll sit on the floor for a bit," Elphaba said, hoisting herself off the sofa to sit on the floor with her back against the loveseat. "You'll just have to help me get back up."
"Anything for you," Glinda promised, plopping to the floor to sit beside Elphaba.
They looked across the room to watch Fiyero sprawl out on the now empty couch.
"I forgot how much he snores," Glinda nodded towards their sleeping prince. "Does he keep you up?"
"Not really. It's him that keeps me up with all of his kicking," Elphaba sighed, tracing lazy circles across her stomach. "It wouldn't surprise me if he turns out to be a dancer like his dad—Oz help me."
"Is he kicking right now?" Glinda asked curiously.
"Here."
Elphaba took Glinda's hand in hers and guided it to her stomach. Glinda gasped as she felt a little foot kick against her hand.
"Oh! Oh, what a miracle!" Glinda squealed. "What a little miracle."
"Yes, until it's two in the morning and he's still at it," Elphaba smiled tiredly. "It's like he's trying to remind me every moment of every day. I'm here, I'm here, I'm here. As if I could possibly forget…"
"He is going to be the sweetest child, Elphie," Glinda said. "I can feel it."
Elphaba took Glinda's hand and laced their fingers.
"So can I," Elphaba agreed softly.
Elphaba leaned her head against Glinda's shoulder and took a deep breath. Her perfume was pleasant and sweet. Soothing.
"I've been thinking about Nessa a lot…mostly when I can't sleep," Elphaba confided quietly. "Thinking about how things might be different if she were alive."
"I know you miss her terribly, Elphie."
"She was intolerable…but she was mine. All mine," Elphaba said. "I know how she was…how she'd gotten. But I can't bring my heart to believe that she was beyond help. But did Oz care? No. They dubbed her a witch, chewed her up, and spit her out. And now she's gone, Glinda. She's just…gone."
Glinda rested her cheek against the top of Elphaba's head, listening carefully.
"Sometimes I like to picture how she'd react. About the baby, I mean," Elphaba explained. "I'm certain it'd start with a righteous scolding about my having sex out of wedlock…but then who knows? I can't shake the feeling that she'd have been a rather splendid aunt…given the chance."
Glinda thought about this for a moment.
"Well, I know it's not the same, Elphie, I'm not his flesh and blood," Glinda began, squeezing Elphaba's hand. "But perhaps… I could fill that role for the baby. Maybe I could be his…Auntie Glinda."
Elphaba leaned back and regarded Glinda with an appraising smile.
"Auntie Glinda, hm?"
Elphaba looked down at her stomach, placing her hand over where the boy was kicking. She nodded to Glinda, signaling her to put her hand there too.
"What do you think, little brat?" Elphaba asked the baby. "Shall we dub her Auntie Glinda?"
They both felt a kick and they gasped and laughed in response.
"He approves," Elphaba grinned. "It's official."
"Oh, I love him, Elphie!" Glinda enthused, shaking her head in wonder. "I just love him so much already."
Elphaba smiled softly at Glinda.
"You really mean that, don't you?"
"With all my heart."
"I'll admit I'm relieved to hear it. Fiyero and I have been wanting to ask you something—something that I'm sure doesn't need asking, but we may as well do so for posterity."
"What is it?"
"Glinda…would you be our baby's godmother?" Elphaba asked. Glinda's eyes widened. "It can be in title only, of course! No obligation. Completely symbolic—"
Elphaba stopped speaking as Glinda's eyes welled quickly with tears.
"No, no. Oh, don't cry, dear girl. I can ask someone else to do it!" Elphaba said hurriedly. "Who's better with children, Pfannee or Shen Shen?"
"Of course, Elphie," Glinda sniffled messily. "Of course I'll be his godmother! Oh! Oh, I want nothing else in the world!"
"Neither do I," Elphaba said kindly, dutifully brushing Glinda's tears away. "After all, it makes the most sense, doesn't it? You already have the wand."
Glinda leaned forward and pulled Elphaba into a lasting hug. Elphaba melted into it, thankful to have Glinda in her corner. Thankful to have Glinda in the baby's corner.
"We were going to ask you together," Elphaba remarked as they pulled out of the hug and returned to watching Fiyero. "But the poor thing is exhausted."
"Well…I'm sure you've been keeping him very, very busy," Glinda hinted suggestively.
Elphaba swatted at Glinda.
"Honestly, Glinda. You're as shameless as him."
"Well I was engaged to the man!"
"Yes you were."
Elphaba hesitated and tucked her hair behind her ears for a thoughtful moment.
"Glinda, do you…"
"Do I what?"
"Do you…" Elphaba sighed. "Blame me?"
"What for?" Glinda asked, though she knew very well.
"For taking him from you," Elphaba said. "Oz, it feels wrong to say it like that, but you understand what I mean. Do you blame me?"
"Yes," Glinda said at once.
Elphaba was admittedly surprised over Glinda's blunt answer.
"I see."
Glinda reached for Elphaba's hand. "I blame you for being so lovely, so bright, so enchanting a person that he couldn't help but fall hopelessly in love with you."
Elphaba held Glinda's gaze for a moment before shifting her eyes to their linked hands.
"He still loves you, you know…" Elphaba said.
Glinda frowned. "How do you know?"
"I know because…" Elphaba stroked her thumb over Glinda's hand and returned her eyes to hers. "How could he not?"
Glinda softened and laced their fingers together.
"Glinda…" Elphaba spoke in a delicate murmur. "If I asked you something would you be honest with me?"
"What is it?"
"…How bad is it getting out there?" Elphaba asked. "How bad is it really?"
Glinda cast her eyes down and began playing with Elphaba's fingers.
"Glinda?"
"It depends on what you mean by bad."
"Glinda," Elphaba sighed. "Listen to me. You have created this big, beautiful bubble for all of us to live in. It's been wonderful, and I have been grateful for it…but it can't last forever."
Glinda said nothing, but her shoulders slackened. Just a bit.
"I need to know what we're up against. I need to know our chances," Elphaba said.
When Glinda didn't speak, Elphaba, deciding to lay all of her cards on the table, released Glinda's hand to affectionately cradle her stomach.
"I see him clearer every day, Glinda," Elphaba said quietly, earnestly. "I know him better every day. The hold that he has over my heart…it gets stronger every day. I just can't help it. Glinda. If I don't set my expectations soon…if I don't resign myself to reality?"
Elphaba solemnly took Glinda's hand again, this time with an insistent squeeze.
"This very well has the power to destroy me."
Glinda took a deep breath.
"Things are…" Glinda began tremulously. "Things are…well…"
"Well what?"
At that moment Fiyero turned over on the couch with a groan, groggily opening his eyes.
"Well wake up you sleepy head!" Glinda greeted Fiyero brightly. "Nice of you to finally join us."
Elphaba sighed inwardly as Glinda's hand, as well as her fleeting chance for answers, slipped from her grasp.
"Hey pretty ladies," Fiyero mumbled with a sleepy half-smile. "Were you talking about me?"
"Gracious Fiyero. Not everything is about you," Elphaba said.
"Oh, but that reminds me!" Glinda said, clearly putting on a show. "Elphie, did you know that Fiyero—"
Glinda leaned over and put her hand in front of her mouth to pretend to whisper in Elphaba's ear. Elphaba smiled mischievously, as if the information were particularly wicked.
"You don't say."
"You two are trouble together. You—" Fiyero stopped mid sentence as Elphaba's smile fell into a grimace. "Elphaba?"
"Hm?"
"Are you okay?"
"Mmhmm."
"Then why aren't you talking?"
"I'm talking. See?" Elphaba said. "This is me talking."
"You looked like you were in pain."
"Well I'm not."
"Glinda, what's happening to her?" Fiyero asked.
"Why are you asking her?" Elphaba complained. "It's already passed!"
"So you admit you had a pain!"
"Let me check the book—" Glinda said, scurrying to her feet.
Elphaba covered her face in her hands.
"Sweet Oz the fuss. They hardly feel like anything!"
"They? They hardly feel like anything? You've had more pains like these?" Fiyero said in a panic. "Glinda, is this normal?"
"I'm looking—I'm looking," Glinda said, flipping through the pages of her book. "Ah ha! Okay, okay, how long has this been happening Elphie?"
"Since the day before yesterday."
"The day before—you don't tell me anything, Elphaba!"
"Hush, Fiyero," Glinda shushed him. "When are they happening?"
"Whenever," Elphaba shrugged.
"Do they hurt terribly?"
"No," Elphaba said, shooting Fiyero a look. "So we can all calm down."
Glinda breathed a sigh of relief and closed the book with a nod.
"It's just as I thought. Elphie, you are experiencing your first false labor pains!" Glinda said cheerily.
"Yaaaay," Elphaba cheered sarcastically. "Hear that Yero? False labor."
"That still doesn't sound good."
"Oh calm down. They're a little on the early side but they're perfectly natural!" Glinda said.
"See?" Elphaba gloated. "Glinda's on my side for once."
"Mmhmm, but you need to tell me if they start to get longer or closer together. Start timing them on that pretty little watch of yours."
"As you say, Doctor Upland."
Elphaba glanced towards Fiyero who appeared pale and clammy.
"Honestly, Fiyero. If this is how you're acting now, how are you going to be for the real thing?" Elphaba asked.
"The real thing," he said faintly. "Elphaba…you're going to give birth."
"Am I? I thought that I was just going to keep growing until I explode and—"
"What if something goes wrong? What if—"
"Yero, love. You're spiraling," Elphaba said. She beckoned for him to join her on the ground against the loveseat. "Come here."
Fiyero sat beside her on the floor and Elphaba took his hand.
"Good, now breathe. In and out," Elphaba demonstrated for him. "That's it, just keep going. You're doing so good, you're being so brave."
"You're not funny, Elphaba," Fiyero scolded upon catching on to her joke.
"I'm a little funny."
Fiyero didn't look amused. Elphaba sighed.
"Yero—"
"We don't have a midwife."
Elphaba and Glinda fell quiet and exchanged a glance. Of course that fact had been in the back of their minds, in theory, for a while. But now, with Elphaba's pains, even false pains, beginning, Fiyero was right. The matter of birth was fast becoming a present and concrete problem.
"Well…no," Elphaba agreed calmly. "We don't."
"Then what are we supposed to do when he comes?" Fiyero asked. "I don't know anything about—all of that."
"Now, Fiyero," Glinda chimed in. "We have to remember that women have been giving birth since the beginning of time. It's the most natural thing in the world! You have a mother, I have a mother, just as so many of us do! Elphie's body knows how to deliver this child just like her mother's did before her."
"Well, I mean…" Elphaba spoke up. "My mother did die in childbirth."
Glinda and Fiyero slowly looked towards Elphaba who shrugged defensively.
"What? She did!"
"Elphie—"
"And she had a midwife."
"I don't like this," Fiyero said. "You're scaring me."
"I know it's scary. I know it's not ideal," Elphaba acknowledged. "But the fact of the matter is…we just don't have anyone we trust enough to deliver this baby for us."
There was a brief pause.
"Yes you do."
Elphaba and Fiyero looked up at Glinda, medical journal still in her hand. She set it aside and moved to kneel on the floor in front of them, taking one of their hands in each of hers.
"Elphie," Glinda nodded to her. "Fiyero," she nodded to him. "It would be my absolute honor to deliver your baby for you."
She dramatically bowed her head as if waiting for applause.
"Glinda—"
"No need to thank me!"
"I wasn't going to," Elphaba said. Glinda's head snapped up with a frown. "I mean—that's good of you, Glinda! So good. But a medical journal does not a midwife make. You've never done this before."
"Well neither have either of you."
"She's got a point there," Fiyero said.
"But I see what you mean," Glinda straightened up, flipping her curls behind her shoulders. "So I guess I'll just have to learn!"
"Learn?" Elphaba asked.
"Oh, yes. I'm a quick study and have a positive attitude. I'm certain that I can find someone to teach me," Glinda promised. She gave Fiyero and Elphaba's hands a big squeeze. "Let me do this for you. For both of you…and for my godson."
Elphaba and Fiyero exchanged a look. Glinda the Good was going to deliver their baby.
It wasn't as if they had any better ideas.
"Okay."
"Yay!" Glinda clapped her hands. She gave both Elphaba and Fiyero a pinch on the cheeks. "Now that we've got that little matter settled, we can talk about more important things."
Elphaba nodded, relieved that Glinda had not forgotten about her plea for news.
"Thank you, Glinda. I really need to know the state of things so we can make a—"
"Oh no silly, something much more important than that," Glinda laughed dismissively. "Tell me. How do you feel about astrological names?"
Over the course of the next two weeks, a previously stormy spring burst into its fullest beauty. Glinda brought fresher bouquets, Fiyero had an extra spring in his step, and Elphaba's spirit further dampened by the day as they edged closer and closer to summer's arrival.
"Fae?" Fiyero called one afternoon, finding Elphaba in bed. "What are you doing?"
The room was dark. Elphaba had drawn out the curtains to block out the spring.
"Thinking."
"Have you learned nothing from being with me?" Fiyero chuckled. He climbed into bed behind her. "What are you thinking about, my love?"
"What we're going to have to do."
Fiyero paused for a moment.
"Do you maybe want to sit out on the balcony for a bit?" Fiyero offered. "Get some air?"
"No. I don't. I want to talk about it. I want to finally make a plan."
Fiyero reached over and Elphaba bristled, not wanting to be held. Sensing her tension, Fiyero retracted his hand.
"Can I get you anything?"
Elphaba breathed a long deep sigh.
"No. Just go."
"Elphaba—"
" Go, Fiyero!" Elphaba snapped. "Leave us be."
Elphaba figured that Fiyero was consulting with Glinda about her shift in mood because the next time she visited, they both tiptoed in on eggshells to greet her.
"Hey, Elphie," Glinda said, finding Elphaba staring out of their bedroom window. "I'm leaving for my apprenticeship today."
She'd taken to calling her midwife training that.
"Fiyero and I would love for you to join us in the sitting room."
"Why?" Elphaba said sullenly, not turning from the window. "So we can talk about names? Eat custard? See what size vegetable my baby is? Go on ahead. Have a merry old time."
"Glinda has something she wants to show us," Fiyero said. "Some…ideas."
Glinda nodded and Elphaba turned.
"Really?"
"Yeah, Elphie. Really. Won't you join us?"
When Elphaba entered the sitting room Glinda was standing by a board on an easel covered in a piece of fabric. Confused but cautiously optimistic, Elphaba sat beside Fiyero on the loveseat.
"What's all this?"
"Elphie, we know how moodified you've been lately and we want you to know that we're here to help. I have been keeping an eye on things and have been giving this so much thought. And you're right…it's time. It's time we get serious about what will happen when the baby comes," Glinda said.
Elphaba's chest lightened with relief.
"Thank you," Elphaba said genuinely, resting her hands on her stomach. She looked at Fiyero. "Thank you both. I know it's not easy to do…but it's time."
"Yes, it is," Glinda agreed solemnly. "And the way I see it we have two options."
Elphaba felt her face slowly begin to fall as Glinda removed the fabric off her easel.
"I call Option A ' The Wizard' route, and Option B ' The Ozian' route."
The poster board was coded with illustrations, big colorful letters, even glitter. Elphaba was stock still and silent.
"Now, let me elaborate. The Wizard route is easy enough to understand and Elphie, I know. I know how you feel about him—how we all feel about him, but please do hear me out. Corrupt though he may be, The Wizard has always wanted you on his team. In this scenario we go to him as a group and ask that he clear your name. You really must admit—you can't afford better protection than The Wizard."
Elphaba said nothing. Glinda anxiously twirled a curl around her finger.
"Obviously it-it's not ideal. But the way I see it you wouldn't have to abandon your cause. You'd just be working closer to the…adversary," Glinda rushed to explain. "And! And. All of us could live in The City together, like you and I dreamed about Elphie. All those years ago. Remember?"
Elphaba said nothing. Fiyero exchanged a glance with Glinda and she hurried along.
"Well let's hear Option B, shall we?" Glinda nodded, tapping the second section on the board. "It's my personal favorite and I think you might like it too, Elphie. I do. Because in this one we don't have to rely on that silly old Wizard! In this option, I take the lead. I spread the word of your goodness. I'll admit there's a bit more risk to this one because I'd be publicly opposing The Wizard, but I feel strongly that I could sway people's loyalty to my side. I mean…" Glinda giggled nervously. "It's me."
Elphaba said nothing.
"And—and once they learn of the baby, well," Glinda scoffed. "All must be forgiven then, right? Regardless of how they feel about you they must find it in their hearts to accept an innocent child…right? Right Elphie? Is there anything you'd like to say?"
Elphaba stood and slowly approached the posterboard. She calmly turned it around to the other side, revealing it to be blank. She nodded and turned out to face Glinda and Fiyero with a disappointed shake of her head.
"That's it?" Elphaba said quietly. "That's all?"
Fiyero stood and gestured to Glinda.
"We just—"
"This is what you came up with?!" Elphaba furiously gestured to the board. The air sucked out of the room. "This is what you've given me to work with?"
"Elphie—"
Elphaba turned to stare Glinda down.
"I grew to understand it the first time. I did. Why you chose to stay behind, chose to align yourself with The Wizard. But this? Now, Glinda? You think after all that has happened I'd beg for his favor now?!"
"He would do it, Elphie. I believe he would—"
"Of course he would! He offered me the same proposition eight months ago! In his palace!" Elphaba shouted. "I didn't take it the first time, I didn't take it then, and I'm sure as hell not going to take it now!"
Elphaba turned her back and began to heatedly pace.
"Well I thought you'd at least consider it for your baby!"
Elphaba froze and slowly turned, a feral look in her eye.
"What did you just say to me?"
"You heard me! I grew to understand you too, Elphaba," Glinda said, sounding out her full name. "Why you were so stubborn about The Wizard—forgetting how much progress can be made from the inside! But it's not just you at risk now. It's Fiyero too—it's the baby!"
"You think I don't know that?!" Elphaba shrieked. "You think I didn't consider this angle months ago? But forgive me if I don't want to raise my son amongst phonies and snakes!"
"Like me, right?" Glinda asked heatedly. "Phonies like me?"
"If the crown fits, wear it!" Elphaba hissed. Glinda flinched but didn't back off. "Besides, what sort of example would I be setting for my son? What kind of mother could I hope to be if I gave up every shred of integrity I have?"
"I knew you wouldn't like the first option," Glinda huffed. "But I had to include it. You haven't even considered the second—"
"The second?!" Elphaba said with a crazed laugh. "The second! The second option is the most dangerous one of all! Tell Oz about the baby? Do you hear yourself?!"
"You've always seen the worst in people."
"And they've always seen the worst in me!" Elphaba seethed. "Have you seen how Oz digests people, Glinda? Fiyero was the golden boy, prince of The Vinkus, and they damn near beat him to death. My baby sister never said so much as a curse word and would cry when her tea got too cold! When she died people sang and danced about her death. In what universe do you see Oz taking pity on the offspring of the wickedest witch there ever was?!" Elphaba shouted with a grand gesture. "Do you really think that a smile and a toss of your hair is enough to undo years of prejudice, Glinda? Years of hatred? And to think you thought I was the one with delusions of grandeur!"
"He's just a little baby, Elphie. Who would threaten a little baby?!"
"Not threaten, Glinda, kill. Wake up! If they find out about him they will kill him. They will kill my baby!"
"How do you know?!" Glinda argued. "How can you possibly know that for sure?!"
"BECAUSE SOMEBODY HAS ALREADY TRIED!"
The room crashed into silence. The only sound between them was Elphaba's agitated breaths until Fiyero at last spoke in a small voice.
"…What?"
Elphaba looked at him, her body shaking.
"Elphaba, what do you mean?" Fiyero asked. "What are you saying?"
Elphaba stalled for a moment before deciding enough was enough.
"I snuck out," she confessed. "I snuck out. Once."
Fiyero's face sobered. "When?"
"A few months ago. It was winter. I was offered a mission and…I was seen by a guard."
"Elphie…how—"
Fiyero held up a hand to signal Glinda to stop talking.
"What happened?"
"He saw that I was with child. And…" Elphaba shook her head, horror wracking her body as she recalled it all. "And he said it was a child born of wickedness! A wicked seed. That he'd be doing Oz a favor to eliminate it!"
"But one person's closed mindedness doesn't mean—" Glinda began.
"He strangled me, Glinda!" Elphaba bellowed. She looked at Fiyero. "He strangled me, Yero."
Fiyero's face twisted into a stunned, pained expression.
"Fae…"
"Yes. Yes, Fiyero. It's terrible but it's true," Elphaba said seriously. "Our son survived an attempt on his life before he so much as moved in my womb."
"Sweet Oz, Elphie," Glinda whimpered. "What did you do?"
"Well I obviously lived to tell the tale," Elphaba muttered.
"But the man. Is he—"
"I took care of it."
"You didn't—"
"No but I could have!" Elphaba said darkly. "And I would have—you must know I would have. Instead I wiped his memory. Years of his memory. We don't have to worry about him, but don't you see? He's only one man! I couldn't hope to do the same to hundreds—thousands of people!"
Fiyero turned his back, hands running through his hair.
"It was reckless of me, Yero," Elphaba called after him. "I was reckless. Selfish. If I could take that night back I would."
He didn't turn.
"No…you know what?" Elphaba thought aloud. "I wouldn't. I wouldn't take it back. Because now I know, Yero. Now I know what kind of world our boy will be born into."
Elphaba slowly turned her head back towards Glinda.
"And so does Glinda."
"What?" Fiyero asked, turning."What do you mean?"
"Tell him, Glinda," Elphaba accused coldly. "Tell him why you've been giving us papers with entire sections missing. Why you change the subject every time I bring up the outside world. You're out there on the frontlines—at least when you're not over here throwing us little baby showers. You know exactly what's out there and you've known all along. Hell! One could even argue that you're even adding to the problem."
"How can you say that?" Glinda said.
"I had Chistery bring me papers, Glinda. Ones with the sections you oh so conveniently leave out," Elphaba leered. She crossed to an armchair and reached under the cushion to pull a modest stack of newspapers. "Like these! Oh, and there was a grand picture on the front-page last week to commemorate the launch of the first Wizard endorsed witch hunt! Look. There's Boq, the Lion, sweet little Dorothy wearing my baby Nessa's shoes. And of course, smiling her winning smile, who's that right up front?"
Elphaba held the paper out for Fiyero and Glinda to see.
"Glinda the fucking Good."
"Glinda…" Fiyero said in a hushed, betrayed tone.
"You know that…um," Glinda began, clearly on the spot. "You know that my job comes with a fair bit of—"
"I have been on my knees begging for the truth, Glinda, ugly though it may be…and all you fed me was lie after beautiful lie," Elphaba said. She approached Glinda face to face. "And I should have known better too, because that's who you are, Glinda. That's all you are. A beautiful, beautiful…" Elphaba threw the paper to the ground at Glinda's feet, " lie."
Glinda's head twitched and she pursed her lips.
"You've still never thanked me by the way," Glinda said tightly. "But I'll say you're welcome anyway. You're welcome, Elphie. You're welcome, Fiyero."
"And why should we be thanking you?" Elphaba sneered.
"For everything!" Glinda snapped. "For everything I've done!"
"You didn't have to do this, Glinda! Any of this!"
"I know! That's what makes me so nice!" Glinda stomped. "To do all of this for you even after what you all did to me!"
"So that's it. All of this has been some high and mighty power trip over the people who wrecked the vision you had for your life. You couldn't have control over us, so what's the next best thing? Having control of your ex-fiancé's bastard!"
" Fae!"
"Because you've still never explained to me, you know. You haven't explained why you volunteered for all of this," Elphaba said, towering over Glinda. "You still haven't told me why you're so invested in a child that is zero-point zero percent yours."
Elphaba delivered the final word in a sharp, hateful hiss. Glinda took a step back, visibly injured. The women stared at each other, wordlessly assessing the new fractures to their friendship, before Glinda at last broke the silence.
"If you are really still this blind after all this time…I couldn't hope to make you see," Glinda said calmly, though with tears in her eyes. "But I pity you, Elphie. What a lonely place your heart must be. To think of schemes, power trips, transactions, debts. To think that someone couldn't possibly do something for you out of the goodness of their heart. Out of friendship," Glinda said. Then, softer. "Out of love."
"Get out," Elphaba jammed her finger towards the hall.
Glinda listened and, for once in her life, left without a word.