AN: I do not own Harry Potter or the house that eats - I found it one day when I was having a hard time sleeping so I was scrolling through you-tube over a year ago. It was something like SCP Foundation or something like that? I am not sure. Very AU.
I eat meat. I used to hunt, and help my family butcher. I have no sympathies for the death of the rooster in this chapter. However, I do have mild sympathies for the poor made up individual whose fate it was to get eaten by the house.
Chapter Warning: Creepy. Really Creepy. Nightmare warning.
Grim Auld Place Basement
Drip.
Drip.
Drip.
Creek.
Drip.
"Oh, cool."
Drip.
"Look, it's like it's own ecosystem down here."
Drip, drip.
"Mate, I think..."
Drip.
"I think I know why..."
Drip.
"I can see a path."
Drip.
"Yeah..."
Drip.
"I wouldn't want to be the (drip) unlucky bastard that gets caught (drip) off of it."
Drip.
Drip.
"Oh..."
Drip.
"Unlucky bastard."
Drip.
Drip.
"Well, we found something, at least."
Drip.
"Harry, we'll go between you (drip) so if we have to apparrate you out (drip) we can grab you guys."
Drip.
"Who goes first?"
Drip.
"Harry."
Drip.
"Why?"
"Because."
Drip.
Squawk.
Fluttering.
Muffled sounds of struggle.
Drip.
"Meany's starting to wake."
Drip.
"Right. Harry goes first (drip) because he's the one with Meany."
Drip.
"Then Fred."
"Then Hermione."
Drip.
"Then George."
"Then Ron."
Drip.
Drip.
"This is just freaky."
Drip.
"Yeah."
"Maybe..."
Drip.
"Maybe you should ask for safe (drip) passage for us (drip) there and back?"
Drip.
"Sounds like a good idea."
Drip.
"Alright."
Drip.
"House, I request passage forward (drip) and back through your heart. (drip) We come bearing a gift (drip) to allow us to live upstairs."
Drip, drip.
"Yes, two drips; one no, please?"
Drip, drip.
"Alright, forward."
Squawk.
Drip.
The sound of steps echoed through the basement as they walked forward down the path to the heart of the basement. Moss grew with what looked like a plant that Ron, Harry, and Hermione had no trouble identifying from their first year leaning away from the wizards and their lumos charms. As they walked, the basement grew damper, until a pool of water was seen with an island of granite in the middle.
"Right."
"Well."
"I suppose any of you know what to do, now that we're here?"
"Form a circle, I guess."
"Harry, what are you doing?"
"Please don't get upset, okay?"
"What?"
"I've done some research into rituals and some stuff that we're not taught at Hogwarts, just to see what they're talking about, okay? I didn't think this would end up looking anything like a ritual or anything, I just..."
"Harry, what are you trying to say?"
"This is going to be minor blood magic."
"WHAT!"
"We have to feed the house, right Hermione? Only this house isn't yet at the point of burning things alive yet."
"Right, go on."
"So we have to kill the rooster and give it the carcass, and maybe pour out the blood as well."
"Gross."
"I don't see the big deal..."
"We butcher our own chickens."
"Right."
"So stand in a circle, or I guess a square, as there's four of you, but you should probably touch my shoulders as I am doing this in all our behalf. I have the knife Sirius gave me, and I'll stand in the center and slice it's throat because we need to spill blood. Ready?"
Foot steps.
Shuffling.
"Ow."
"That's my foot."
"I'm off, sorry."
"Ok, ready."
"Ready."
"Ready."
"Ready."
"I'm ready as well."
Squawk, aroorarooraroo, squa.
Bones cracking.
Shlit.
Splatter, rush, drip, drip, drip, drip..., drip.
Thud.
Click.
"I think I'll throw the rooster to the snaky plants that grow along the walls. I know they're probably eating the vermin that they catch, but I think that that way I know the body gets eaten."
"I brought wet soapy rags so you can clean up mostly."
"Oh, thanks. I'd hate to run across your mother like this."
"I wonder if the house will let us be now?"
"I hope so, I mean I went off of what that other house does."
"So, now, Harry?"
"House, I hope our gift was appropriate."
Swish, thud.
"Good throw."
"The plants are already starting to feel it out."
"Let's go. I don't want to take to long."
"Yeah, no need to make the house put up with us down here more than we have to."
"Agreed."
"Potter, what is the world gave you the good idea to go down in the basement?"
Harry gulped. He was caught.
"Exploring?"
The group scattered to the winds as best they could, but found that they were unable to flee far, stuck in the area around Snape.
"Now, I will ask again, and don't lie to me. What were you doing in the basement?"
"Feeding the house a rooster so it would stop attacking us when we try to clean it."
"How do you know that the house is sentient enough to require feeding?"
"Hermione kept a list of incidents and found reference in the muggle world to something similar?"
"You know nothing of what you dunderheads are messing with. Do nothing of the sort again."
"But sir,"
"If you fully believe that you had to do this ill prepared stunt, then go get changed and bring me your results and thinking. I want each of you to hand me a four paragraph report as soon as possible at least on what you were thinking so that I can understand what in the world you guys did and prepare for any ill consequences your lack of knowledge in what you were playing with resulted in."
"Yes, sir."
They were let go that time.