Disclaimer: Bonesboy15 doesn't own Helluva Boss or Naruto. The following is a written work of fan-fiction. It contains adult language and situations. Reader discretion is advised.

Who's That Father?

The Beautiful People

(Then: Lust Ring, Sweet & Malicious Corner Store)

Ozzie's was in lockdown, and demons across Lust were going apeshit. Why? A Sinner with a permissive band was using his powers to entertain himself. The purple-skinned fucker was able to ensnare those that looked him in the eyes to do as he bid. The Sin that had invited the Sinner down for a good time was unreachable for reasons unknown. Probably getting his rocks off in his personal office and didn't give a shit as long as he wasn't bothered.

So, not wanting to miss out on possible patrons or participants, the Archduke of Lust called The Moddey Dhoo PMC in to handle it. Great in theory; Hellhounds were notoriously resistant if not immune to psionic ability, could take more damage than most other demons, and a rare few had a few tricks of their own depending on their magical aptitude. They should be able to get close and take the Sinner down. Again, it was a great idea in theory.

Putting it to action was the hard part.

Despite his coming participation in the Coalition of Kings Tournament, Naruto still had to put money on the table and he had been registered as a freelancer since he was sixteen. When a couple of friends from his 'Pack' days reached out with a well paying job that would cover his bills while he trained for the tournament, he jumped at the opportunity. Being away from his puppy for so long was already making him antsy.

He pushed his back to a concrete barrier and released the empty magazine from his sidearm. Armed with fully automatic rifles, a small squad of Demons and Imps had him pinned outside the S & M store he and his teammates were supposed to rendezvous at about fifteen minutes ago. He was already down one of the three magazines he had for his pistol and only two of the nine fuckers shooting at him had been downed for his efforts. The cheap ass, loaned AR that the armorer in Moddey Dhoo gave him jammed half-way through the first shot.

First splurge purchase I can justify, a personal weapon that won't crap out on me! He growled as he slid a new magazine into his sidearm and pulled back the slide to chamber a round. Before he could attempt to return fire, a grenade tumbled over his head and landed beside him. He stared at the pin that was still in it.

...Okay, maybe today isn't all that bad. Another grenade landed beside it, this one lacking the pin.

"Fuck."

Naruto threw himself through the S & M store's broken window, landing on a pile of shattered glass that stray bullets had already burst through. He groaned and pulled himself past the first shelf of dildos just as the explosion went off. The shooting stopped. He listened carefully and checked his arms and legs. No lacerations that were too deep, but he had a healthy amount of cuts from landing on glass. Whatever, he had time to think about his options.

Holding out for the rest of his team? Unlikely. Five gunners armed with ARs and handheld explosives was not what he was told he'd be up against. Rioting, mind-controlled idiots was more along the lines of what he was told they'd expect. Fucking intel dropped the ball so fucking hard...He couldn't afford to die out here. Not when his puppy needed him.

Another option: Bail? And not get paid or get blacklisted? That was almost as bad as dying. Only then he'd have to rely fully on his grandfather to support him and his puppy. That was not a fucking option; he wouldn't be able to live with the smug Ol' Toad if it got that bad.

The last one was to clear the road. Not counting the spare magazine on his belt, he had eight bullets and nine enemies. Not ideal when he hadn't yet regrouped with the rest of his squad nor when he didn't know if they had support on the way. A burst of fire had Naruto snarl and lose his train of thought.

"Oh, fuck this! I'm not fucking dying in a fucking sex shop!" He growled and kicked at the shelf across from him. A vibrator gun dropped down and started to rumble. He stared at it for a moment before his ears popped up and a grin spread across his face. He looked up at the shelves around him and–Score! They had one.

Thank fuck that the demons in Lust were kinky shitters. He crept along the ground and used the butt of his sidearm to break into the display case. He holstered his sidearm, grabbed the toy on display and started to flip it over and around. He was looking for a particular sticker that would put a hole in his plan.. Please don't be display only, please don't be display only, please don't be on display only–Yes! Thank fuck!

(Warning: Active. Asmodeus Industries is not responsible for injuries sustained by HDL-830. Use proper lubricant and restraints to avoid unwanted penetration of non-orifices. Maximum Toy Load: Thirty Inches.)

"Thirty inches? Fuck...Well, that's probably the idea." Naruto shrugged and popped the HDL-830's chamber open. He kept low as he crawled through the store and gathered what he thought would be the best – or funniest – way to deal with these fuckers. He read over some of the descriptions on the toy boxes and started to snicker even as the squad of demons kept firing into the building. Did they not have limited rounds?

"Rainblow Rammer, a classic."

"Hugh Grunt Replication. Nineteen inches, Anti-Christ...A Sinner was that big...in life and death?! Must've died from abnormal blood flow...Holy shit, he did! Ha!"

"The Porsche. Fourteen inches of unpainted solid steel? Yep. That'll hurt."

"The Echidna? That sounds unpleasant – Four heads?! ...based on an actual animal penis found on Earth..? Yeesh, and I thought some of the Envy-born were weird. Okay."

"Flash Fucker...Based on the infamous Hellhound from classic amateur porn such as–...Gross...Eh, not much smaller than mine. Sure."

Naruto finished loading the HDL-830 with a healthy application of Ozzie's Orgasmic Ooze and went back to the window. He waited for the current barrage of bullet fire to stop and listened for the telltale sound of magazine's hitting the ground. Sure enough, the barrage stopped and when the first magazine dropped, he popped up.

Decked out with a bandolier of dildos and with what looked like a conical-tubed leaf blower in his hands, the Orange Hellhound pressed on the motorized weapon's start button.

"Choke on this." He snarled and pulled the trigger of the Hot Dog Launcher model 830. The first dildo that shot out twirled through the air in all of its rainbow glory and ripped through the center mass of a Lesser Demon. The allies stared at the body as it fell back and then snapped their attention back at Naruto. He grinned and his eyes shone. "Yeah, you guys are fucked."

Oh, he was so glad he was born in Hell.

"...Kill 'im!"

Naruto laughed as he tore through the opposition. When it was done, he had maybe one bullet hole in his thigh and the HDL-830's gas ran out. He sighed sadly and pulled the bandolier of dildos off. He traded out for one of the other demons' ARs and gathered magazines from the intact bodies that he could find.

"I wish I could've lasted longer, I'm sorry. This never happens to me." Naruto snickered to himself as he rummaged along the pockets of a dead Imp that had The Echidna jammed in her throat. She flipped him off with her one intact arm and he patted her head. "Clean yourself up before you go, huh? You're a mess."

"...Hate...You..."

He's heard worse things as dying words – A stray bullet had him duck down.

"Goddammit!"

"Hold fire! ...Uzumaki! That you?!"

"Where the fuck have you guys been?!" He roared and rounded on the other four jackasses he was supposed to be working with. He glared at his two 'friends' and then the C.O., an entitled jerk-off that looked like a fugly assed Hellhyena more than a Hellhound.

"We were on our way to Ozzie's. You didn't check in on comms."

"...Because I don't have a fucking comm! When did we get comms?!"

"At the las–Oh, right. We sent you to scout ahead while we stopped at the checkpoint..."

"...Choji, hold him back." Shikamaru, a Baphomet that doubled as their medic, muttered. Tch, bastard thought he was so fucking clever, he should've finished medical school. The large St. Bernard Hound nodded and grabbed Naruto just as he leapt at the C.O.

"I'm gonna rip your fucking throat out! You fucking dumb motherfucker! When you set a fucking rendezvous, you make it and then you go to a detour!"

"Settle down, Uzumaki–!" The C.O.'s second, a doberman looking jackass, advised.

"No, fuck you assholes!" Naruto snarled as Choji wrangled him to his feet and held him back by his arms. "You shitters gave me a crap gun–"

"It worked fine in the armory–" The C.O. shrugged.

"Sent me off without proper intel –"

"You know as much as we do!"

"Do these fucks look like rioters to you?!" Naruto snapped as he pointed at the nearest dead demon.

"So they got a hold of some guns, big deal. Shit happens–"

"Actually, like the Eighty-Sixers got pulled in, too." Shikamaru muttered as he crouched by a dead demon and looked at the brand on their arm hidden by their shirt. He pulled the half-gone cigarette from his mouth. "Bloodthirsty Wrath fuckers are running around Lust unchecked? What a fuckin' drag."

"...Shit, boss, if there's Eighty-Sixers down here, we might be biting off more than we can chew." The Doberman muttered. The Hyena-fuck pursed his lips.

"...Alright, we're pulling out."

"WHAT?!" Naruto snarled. He just went through all that shit and they were gonna drop the job? Was he even going to be compensated? Probably not. Fuck he hated being a freelancer! Shit pay and shit hours were not worth any amount of freedom if this was how the job was going to go. "Are you fucking serious!?"

"Dead ass, Uzumaki. We were signed on to deal with rioters, not a rival PMC."

"You didn't think that could be a fucking possibility?!"

"Of course not." The dumbass made the mistake of leaning in to speak down to him. Like he was better than him. Like he was worth more value. Like he didn't care if Himawari didn't have food or warmth. The seventeen-year-old hound saw red. "Listen you little cur, unlike you freelance losers, we're contractually obligated–"

The only warning they had before he sank his teeth into the other Hellhound's face was the unholy snarl that left his throat. His jaws sank deep into the C.O.'s skin. He felt the fucker's bone crack in his jaws and that sweet delicious metallic taste of blood poured into his mouth. His eyes shone bright as he twisted his head and pulled back.

"Shit! Choji, grab his mouth and try to pry it off! Dennis, help me get Armon free! Belphegor fucking dammit, Naruto, control yourself!" Shikamaru growled as the rest of the squad tried to act as instructed, sans the one causing the issue. The C.O. yelped and growled as he struggled before he started to whine and whimper. Naruto tightened his bite even as Choji's claws pried at his mouth and got another louder crunch for his efforts. "Fuck! Fuck! Naruto, let him go! ...Shit, he's not breathing! Choji, knock him out!"

"Sorry, Naruto."

A massive thick paw slammed down onto his head from above and the world went dark.

(Now: Beelzehaven, Wild Things Facilitated)

"I thought your crew had this handled?" Naruto sighed as he leaned back in his seat and rubbed his temples.

His day had been going great until now: Himawari was woken up, got ready and to school on time with Echo Team on protective detail today; Jiraiya had a new financial lead on the Familiawit Knolastname and was looking into it in order to deter their bizarre efforts to hinder W.T.F.'s growth in Beelzehaven; and he'd locked in a private booth at one of his favorite diners in Rave Town for his date tomorrow.

Then it all went to shit when – Naruto didn't blame him explicitly, but the situation was not ideal – Vortex called. It wasn't even eight yet, and whatever plans he had for today to get more of a foothold in Beelzehaven were being derailed. Vortex's position might be officially part-time, but he was their best liason and acted as a talent scout in the field. Heck, he might not have most of Lambda if not for Vortex.

Beside him, Priscilla stood, tapping away at her tablet's screen and shook her head as she listened in on his conversation with his friend.

"We did until half of them dipped out when the Acid Spitters sent that Shriek out saying they were looking for Roadies and Security. Shit, if I wasn't already signed on with Vee, I might've joined 'em." Vortex admitted. He chuckled. "Did you ever think Rox's band of drug addicts would actually manage to reach the top of Hell's charts?"

"No, but I'm surprised by demons all the fucking time." He sighed and looked at his watch. The phone call had only been going for five minutes, but it felt like hours had passed. "How many bodies do you need?"

"Ideally? Just a team if you can spare one."

"Not possible." Priscilla huffed. "Lambda and Gamma are off rotation; Echo's assigned to Pup Patrol–"

"For the last fucking time, we're not calling it that. ...Officially." Naruto grumbled while Vortex muttered a confused, "What the fuck is 'Pup Patrol'?"

"Security for Cerberus Elementary. The Parents and Matron approve of it, and the puppies are strangely content with it. Some even seem interested." Priscilla mused. Naruto smirked.

"Gotta love that social brainwashing."

"It would be conditioning, if anything."

"And you two aren't dating, right?"

"Don't insult me like that, Vortex."

"Ouch." Naruto deadpanned at his unapologetic P.A. before he sighed and pinched at the space between his eyes. "Who do we have available?"

"BNB of Bravo are on site for any individual requests that might come up, Buster is still on medical for another week. And Chase asked for the day for personal reasons," Priscilla said. "Alpha's on Mayor Watch and Delta's at the Academy, but we could pull them if needed."

"We need more teams... Another recruitment drive, maybe another look at registered freelancers." Naruto muttered and tapped on his desk while Priscilla took note. He worked his jaw and sighed. "Fuck. Pris, get BnB up here. Vortex, where do you want us to meet you?"

"Us?" "Us?" Priscilla asked with a disapproving glare while Vortex sounded surprised.

"What? I'm an active fucking member of the company too, aren't I? Vortex, BnB and I should be able to handle a one-night topside gig." Naruto shrugged at his assistant's continued glare. "Look, I'm not thrilled about the idea, either. I hate up-top jobs, but Vortex is on payroll and a listed 'part-timer'. It looks bad on us if we don't at least back him with a squad, right?"

"...I hate that you picked up on the politics of the job so fucking easily." Priscilla groaned into her hand. She glared at the phone on his desk. "Vortex, you're on notice."

"Right. ...Uh, Boss, are you sure about working security? I know it's not your...preferred gig."

"Tex, this doesn't have to be awkward. Just tell me where to stand and what drunks to toss around." Naruto huffed in amusement. It'd been a good near year since he and Vortex were in the same room, so his reaction to the past year's foot-long growth spurt was bound to be funny. "Where do you want us to meet?"

"Uh, well, Vee's got to link up with a label in Pride before we head up for the tour. I'll text you the address."

"Alright, see you there man." Naruto smirked as he hung up. He yelped as his nose was whapped by his assistant. "Ow! Pris!"

"That was for the heart attack you're going to give that poor boy." She scoffed and then gave his head a quick pat as she glared at him. "Try not to seduce another rock star? Turning down the Acid Spitters' request for bodies was bad enough."

"...Oh, that's what those voicemails were about." Naruto muttered, eyes wide. He'd walked into the office yesterday to an interesting pair of voicemails left on his machine. No wonder Rox had cussed him out as a cheap sellout in every language known to Hellhounds, then immediately called back with another to apologize and claim to be drunk. Why she didn't just call him on his personal number to do that, he didn't know. Maybe she really was too drunk to consider it.

Any further thoughts of his former Friend-With-Benefits were dashed as the elevator lit up and his old friends walked in.

"Choji! Shikamaru!" He grinned at the two as he stood up. "Good news, we're going on a job together!"

"Seriously? ...Did you get fucking taller?" The slacker Baphomet asked and Naruto tightened his grin.

"Yes. Not the point."

"Wow," Choji said as he strode in and put his hand on Naruto's head. He sighed and let his friend go through the routine. "Up to my chin! That's quite a bit, Naruto."

"Thank you, Choji."

"Man, you remember when you came up to my hips? You were so small–Even Shikamaru was taller than you for a minute there!"

"Yes. Thank you, Choji." Naruto sighed and patted the large Hellhound's shoulder. "Dress to impress, boys. We're on security duty with Vortex tonight."

"Cool!"

"Dammit, he's watching the pop star, isn't he?"

"Yep."

"...I quit."

"No, you don't." Naruto laughed and pulled Shikamaru with him as they headed for the elevator. "You owe me. For life. Your words."

"Troublesome Mutt."

"Don't you forget it, wooly-bully."

(Pride, Imp City Streets)

One week had gone by since the last time she saw Naruto, and it had been the longest week of her life. The coffee date ended well... No, it ended more than well. It ended great! Loona got a kiss on the cheek when he dropped her off at her apartment after they strolled around Imp City for a bit. She might have been a bit floaty and crashed after a burst of the zoomies had her zipping about trying to make some food by the time Blitzø got home. They had another date scheduled for tomorrow, a lunch this time at some casual place he said had the best food in all of Gluttony.

All Loona had to do was avoid getting any jail time. Unfortunately, the chances of that happening looked slimmer by the second as she rode shotgun in the company's van. Her left eye twitched and her ears burned before they folded back as Blitzø belted out his shit rendition of "Mustang Dong" while the actual song played on the radio.

"Oh, for the love of everything evil! If you're going to fucking sing, could you please try to do it without deafening me?!" She snarled at Blitzø. He gasped, clutched at his chest and she rolled her eyes. Here we go, theatrics incoming.

"Loony, why are you so mean to Daddy?" He sniffled and rubbed at his eyes as he turned into their company's parking lot. "I tried to share something beautiful with you and you threw it back in my fucking face. I thought you loved me–?"

"Blitzø! Car!" Fatty shrieked from the backseat. Both Loona and the aforementioned Imp looked ahead and the van's brakes squealed before they ran into the pitch black SUV that was pulled in front of their building with its hazards on. Loona caught herself on the dash and huffed while Blitzø, as expected, lost his shit.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me! What the fuck is this, a Chinese drive through?!" He put their van in park and jumped out to go accost the driver. "Hey! HEY! Asshole! Get the fuck out of the way–Oh...Wow, you're...uh...Big."

Loona looked up and her eyebrows shot up. That was a massive Hellhound that stepped out of the driver's seat. Taller than Naruto for fucking sure, and yeesh, his face. That breed was just not her...she wasn't into the 'domestic' looking Hounds. The additional rotund belly didn't help and–Was he wearing W.T.F. gear?

"I get that a lot. Sorry, we'll be out of your way in a second, Little Imp." The Hound chirped with a pleasant front that had to be fake. No Hellhound was that nice...well, Naruto was up until someone threatened his puppy, but Loona understood that. The Hound looked up and met her gaze through the dash. He gave a brief wave and then looked back down at Blitzø, who was still blue-screening.

"...He's so fuckin' cute!" Millie squealed, jerking Loona out of her own stupor. She turned and growled at the Imp, only to stop when she saw her biting her lip and squirming in her seat. "Oh, Moxxie, can't we just try to find a pup for ourselves?"

"Millie, we've gone over this. We barely make enough with this job to cover all of our own expenses," Fatty said with a tired sigh.

"But look at how soft and cuddly he is!"

"...Him or the Baphomet?"

Loona looked back and sure enough, there was a candle-headed sheep demon talking up to the Hound. Huh, he was also wearing a W.T.F. shirt...was this a–?

"...it's our pleasure. Wild Things Facilitated looks after its people and we help each other where we can. If I have to go out and get dirty to do that, I will."

"How dirty are we talking?"

"Uh...dirty to an extent."

Loona's ears perked up, she knew that voice. She looked to the right at the building where their office was and her tail started to wag at the figure that walked out. Yes, yes, yes. Naruto was back in his sexy, form-fitting uniform. The aviator sunglasses were new, and she was torn on them. On one hand, they worked in his favor, but on the other hand, they hid the pretty blue eyes she liked staring at. She could lament over that later, his geared up back was to her. Her eyes ran up and down along the definition and tight rear on display. Mm-hm, she couldn't wait to get her hands on that. Fuck, she liked seeing him all dressed up and talking to Verosika May–Hold on.

"Is that Verosika Mayday?" She asked the other two Imps in the Van with her.

"Who–?"

"Ugh, plebeians, the both of you." She rolled her eyes and checked her compact mirror real quick. Mmn, she wasn't a fan of how her makeup looked right now. She needed to get out of there before either the Pop Star or the Hound she was interested in spotted her. Of course, in true Blitzø fashion, the imp did something embarrassing first... He dropped the mother of all bombs. Loona momentarily forgot about her makeup concern when it came out and she jumped out of the van.

"You dated Verosika Mayday?!" She cried out at her adoptive father and then bit her tongue. Fuck! She didn't want Naruto to see her with her makeup done so shitty! Please don't turn, please don't turn–Okay, only an ear flicked. That's good.

"You dated a Pop Star?" Millie asked, popping up behind her. Fatty slid the back door open and added, what she would begrudgingly admit, was a good burn.

"You dated?"

"A-ha. A-ha. Very. Fucking. Funny." Blitzø deadpanned and shook his head. "Look, it was only for a few months and didn't mean anything in the long run."

"Oh, great. A domestic." Naruto rubbed his muzzle and looked away as the Pop Star's face twisted. Loona wasn't exactly sure how to describe it. Incensed, maybe?

"Didn't mean anything? Fuck you, Blitzo." The Succubus Pop Star stormed over to the Imp and poked at his face. "We had a good thing going and then you got fuckin' spooked! You left me to pay off the hotel room, drove three rings over to Wrath and maxed my credit cards on shitty horse riding lessons?!"

"...Bitch, you will not let that go!" Blitzø snapped as he finished off reciting the incident alongside her. He crossed his arms and then gawped when he looked at the hound beside her. "Oh, fuck me! What the fuck is he doing here?!"

"...Do I know you?" Naruto asked, arching a brow. The Imp failed to work his mouth and pointed at him.

"Fucker, you strangled me while you stepped on my employee in my own fucking company!"

"Hey, Tex, you got a Hound here that's gonna take your job if you're not careful." Verosika called over her shoulder.

"Ha. Ha. Ha." A deep voiced, black-wolf Hellhound mock laughed as he walked out to stand behind her. Shit, Loona was going to start panting at this rate. He was hot, too. Not like Naruto's 'Yes, Daddy' hot that she wanted all over her, but definitely the typical 'get fucked by an alpha male' kind of hot she was more used to seeing and fantasizing about. Especially with that scarred eye. He, unlike the other two Hounds and Baphomet, wasn't wearing the mercenary company attire, save for a band around his left arm that had the company's 'W.T.F'. logo on it. Scarface crossed his arms and glanced at Naruto. "Is that what you're into now?"

"Don't start with me, 'finger' boy." Naruto snarked back before he uncrossed his arms. He put a hand on his hip and scratched the back of his head – which, by the way, did wonders to show off his broad as fuck back and those round, round shoulders she wanted to dig her claws into – before he faced Blitzø. "Look, I don't appreciate people trying to besmirch me or my company while I'm on the clock. So, refresh my memory–"

"You broke into my fucking waiting room, harrassed my poor little secretary–" She's killing him. Yep, Loona was going to kill him. Shame, she really wanted to go on that lunch date tomorrow. "–before you got a cheap shot off, then assaulted me and my employee!"

"...No, still nothing." Naruto crossed his arms again and his tail flicked, drawing Loona's eyes back down to that fuckin' firm ass. Dammit, why was this happening today? Why couldn't this have happened tomorrow or–?

"You were looking for your little cur that dropped gold all over our floor!"

Loona felt her blood freeze as Naruto's tail stilled.

Oh. Fuck. Blitzø, why? Why the fuck did he think he could call any puppy that? That was like calling an Imp a fire-toad to their face. Only this time...Shit, he just called the last puppy anyone should call that to the puppy's very protective father.

A very deep, very low growl started to fill the air. The Baphomet was nudging the other Hound back into their SUV and he clambered in behind him before they pulled up to the other end of the lot.

"The fuck is a 'cur'?" Verosika asked with a frown. The growl got even deeper and Loona whimpered. Not out of fear, but...shit that sound and the reason for it was doing things for her.

Scarface, Tex, whatever that sexy hound's name was, he was glaring at Blitzø, too. And he clearly had a better read on what was about to happen than the Pop Star. He put a hand on the succubus' arm and pulled her back to the other side of the doors.

"C'mon. We're in the splash zone."

"What?"

Like the last time she saw him face off against her adoptive father, Naruto moved before she could blink. She heard a cartoonish 'squeak' and then a crash as some fucker's car got imploded by the body of a rapidly flying Imp. The Hound she was extremely thrilled to have a second date with right now was standing where Blitzø once stood, his leg fully extended and a murderous snarl on his face.

"Uh...Did he just punt Blitz into that car?" Millie asked.

"He sure did, Honey." Fatty sounded too amused and normally she'd tear him down for it, but Loona was kind of locked in 'horny' mode right now.

Damn, that was an image she wanted to flick the bean to. Absently, she snapped a pic with her phone. With flash. Fuck. Don't look, don't look, don't–Dammit.

"Loona?" His ears perked up and his tail wagged. She gulped before she forced a smile and a wave as he walked over to her. Her tail started to give its own little wag as he towered over her. Yep, yes, I want I want I want– Whoa, easy. Down girl, down. He's working right now. ...Fuck, it was so hot that he was working right now. His super friendly grin was on his face, as if he didn't absolutely body Blitzø with one move. "Hey, I didn't expect to see you today."

"Back atcha." She gave him a very obvious once-over and then felt her ears warm. Fuck. Her makeup looked awful. Quick, distract him before he noticed! "So, um, was kicking my D-Boss's ass part of your plan?"

"I think I can be forgiven for that." Naruto shrugged. And, well, yeah. She totally agreed with him, not even in a 'simp' way. Blitzø basically talked shit about the puppy. Loona still wasn't sure how she felt about him having a puppy that he made priority number one, but her instincts told her it was fucking awesome. Two ruined pairs of shorts confirmed that. "You ready for tomorrow?"

"Uh, yeah. Yes." She grinned, more than willing for this shift of topic. She crossed her arms and looked away, trying to hide her shit makeup job behind her hair as his nice smile made her ears burn. "I mean, if you're not busy later, maybe we could, um, get dinner or something?"

"Depends on how long this gig runs. It's a one night thing." He shrugged. Oh, bummer. Don't look too disappointed–Oh, hi! Hello, handsome DILF face suddenly close to hers. "Gotta admit, seeing you again so soon really brightened up my day."

Hold on. Checking...Checking...And, no, wait, still checking...Yep. Yes. She was putty for this Hellhound. Fuck. He was just so hot and super sweet, and his voice was smooth like melted vanilla, but husky with that latent power, and he smelled so good, and he was interested in her.

Loser Loona.

Suck it, Vikki.

"Yeah, it's um, nice to see you, too."

Shit, did his smile become even brighter? How was that possible? Oh, his nose was so close, she was flashing back to the end of their first date, when he kissed her cheek. Fuck, she was going to go into 'zoomies' if he did that again. She might do that even if he doesn't. No, nope, come on, get control of yourself, bitch. ...This is not going well, she needed outside interference to give her a hand!

"Ugh..." Speak of the demon and Blitzø shall oblige. "What the fuck was the size of that cock that hit–? Hey! You get away from her, you-you-you–...Someone get me the fuck out of this fucking thing, I have shards of glass in my ass!"

"To be continued." Naruto gently knocked her chin with his knuckle and straightened up before he went over to aid Blitzø.

Loona would be more alarmed by it, but she was still out of it, whimpering as her tail waggled. His scent lingered in her nose and his touch made her feel all warm and tingly inside. She bit her lip and made a quick decision, jumping into the work van and kicking the Imps that were inside out. She slammed the back door shut and then climbed up into the driver's seat.

"Hey, shitbirds," she said to the married duo. "Tell Blitzø I'll be back in an hour. Maybe two."

"Wh–What, where are you–?"

"I'll be fucking back in an hour or two!" Loona snarled at Fatty before she floored it in reverse to get on the road, before she shifted gears and sped back towards her apartment.

She was not dealing with the heat in her core and wearing shitty makeup in the presence of her sexy DILF date, the Scarface hottie and Verosika fucking Mayday. Either she fixed her makeup or she dealt with her pussy's demands for attention. The tools she needed for either issue to be properly resolved happened to be back in her apartment...unless she could've convinced the DILF to go explore second base with her real quick before they got to their second date.

That was so unlikely, though. Dammit.

As he faintly registered tires squealing, Naruto grabbed the Imp by the front of his coat, he yanked once and Blitzø was free. A single rough jostle and the glass was more or less out of his backside. The orange Hellhound's lip curled in a snarl before he planted Blitzø into the lot like he was a fucking tree. His foot slammed down on the Imp's chest and trapped his shoulders. He bent down low and growled in the now very attentive Imp's face.

"If that word ever leaves your mouth again...There will be no fucking rock in all of creation you can hide under. I will find you. I will end you. Understood?"

"Wh...What word?"

"Cur." Naruto clarified. He wasn't a total asshole. It wouldn't be fair to leave him in the dark and it wouldn't make him better than those that used it. Naruto narrowed his eyes. "I advise that you erase it from your vocabulary, yesterday. Agreed?"

"You...S-Stay away from my s-secretary."

"No. I don't think I will." The Hound leaned in closer and grabbed the Imp by the horn. He pulled on it until it cracked and the Imp let out a grunt of discomfort. "I don't have to like you. You don't have to like me. We can probably get along if we try, and if not...One last warning. And this one is a warning." He tugged on the horn to get another crack and a louder cry. "So pay the fuck attention to my words: If you ever – and I fucking mean ever – talk about my daughter like that again? I will rip these fucking horns out of your skull and jam them in through your rib-cage, up through your lungs, and pull them out of your fucking nose! Understood?"

"...M–Arugh! Fido-faced bastard!" Blitzø cried out as the horn was pulled again. "YES! Yes! I understand! Fuck!"

"Good." Naruto let him drop and stepped back before he hauled the Imp back to his feet. He kept a hand on Blitzø's jacket to keep him from rushing off. Or from trying to get a sneak attack in. "Listen, about Loona...She's a grown adult. You should treat her like one."

"Fuck you, she's my baby." The Imp jerked himself out of his grasp and stormed over to where Vortex and Verosika were.

"...Oh, goddammit, he's the one that adopted her." He groaned and rubbed his face. Shit. He just assaulted his date's boss and 'father'. Great going, dipshit. Great fucking going.

Well, at least she was adopted by a somewhat reasonable Imp rather than a complete and utter sociopath. He sighed and glanced back at–Huh? The van was gone as was Loona. Where did she go? Bummer. He was always up for some eye-candy, and that cute petite hound was definitely that. What could he say? Long hair and a long tail, two things he liked more than the general wants of the reproductive variety.

He sighed and looked at his watch. When he did, he groaned. Shit, and now he had to go play bodyguard.

"Fuck my life." He looked up and stuck two fingers in his mouth to whistle. Eyes zeroed on him and he waved at the one that was only half a set. "Yo, Vortex! Her meeting's starting in eight! Get her back upstairs."

"Thanks, Boss! C'mon, Vee." Vortex guided their charge back inside and away from the antagonistic Blitzø. Naruto looked down the way at his employees and stared. Were they bickering over parking by the hydrant? ...Yes. Yes they were. Because of course they were.

"I don't pay myself enough for this." He muttered before he trudged inside. He hoped Himawari was having a good day–He clapped his hand to his face again and his head rolled back. "Fuck, I forgot the signature book. Ugh, Pickle's going to hate me..."

AN: Shorter chap! Or is it?...yeah a bit.

Thanks for reading!