The Last Timeline

by EllaWhyteTales

After doing everything the right way in the first timeline, Frisk was compelled to do the genocide route for what they felt were "good" reasons. In doing so, they have broken utterly and become something new. Something absolutely devoted to Sans, and not remotely sane. Now they are striving to fix everything and find their path forward. What the hell is Sans supposed to do now?

6. Chapter 6 - Dinner at the Resort

Chapter 6 - Dinner at the Resort

Sans had been feeling increasingly fond of the human, and seeing that attack against Muffet shook him up a little again. But it was still good to have seen it - it helped make everything feel more real. Like he understood who they were.

They were someone who had an unbelievably intense amount of determination and will to live. A drive to find their path that was almost terrifying.

In their first path, they pursued peace with an intensity that was hard to credit, but was clear to see. Such as with the unusual path to victory with the Royal Guards. In their second timeline, they were absolutely convinced that they couldn't fall to darkness - and it sounded like they had good reason to feel that way - and they made the decision to murder everyone, to draw out more information on their psycho ghost.

In that path, they followed through, despite what sounded like really damned significant obstacles. And all because they felt like they had to, in order to have confidence in the security of the future.

And in the end, they fell in love with him. And that was enough to finally shake them from their path, as they just couldn't kill him, even if they felt like it would help with their goals. Nothing else - not death, not pain, not guilt, nothing - none of it worked, but that. And it sounded like it's what stopped the literal end of everything.

Then with the shield of LOVE removed, they regained themself and walked again the path of perfect peace. He didn't see anything that even remotely threatened to kill them, and they even kept snacking on extra food when fully healed, since they were running out of space to keep it. Even with the dimensional boxes attached to their phone.

There was more to see, of course, but he felt like he understood them, now.

He didn't have a lot more time to think. They were heading to the resort.

Ah, what the hell.

He teleported out in front of the resort just before they got into view. They came by, gave him a grin, and he asked them to grab some dinner with him. Their eyes shone with delight and they softly accepted.

They took a "shortcut," which they snickered at again, and found themselves in the restaurant.

"well. here we are," he said. "so."

They smiled warmly at him.

"your journey's almost over, huh?" he asked.

"Getting there," they agreed.

"gotta admit, i don't know what to say," he admitted. "you've given me a lot to think about. both what you said, and from watching your journey."

"Voyeur," they said teasingly.

"yeah, yeah," he laughed. "last time we were here… what all did we talk about?"

"Do you want the long or short version?" they asked.

He was in full on information gathering mode, so the answer was obvious.

"we got time," he said. "let's hear it all."

"You seemed sad," they said after a moment, looking thoughtful. "Lost in your own head. You said something about how I must really want to go home, and that you really understood that. I didn't know how to respond, and didn't really want to correct you, so I just… listened. It sounded like… like you'd lost your home. You mentioned the same idea, in passing, during our fight, too."

He nodded.

"I don't know what's going on with all that, but I also don't want to push," they said with a small smile. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry for what you've lost, and if I can help, I will. But back to the conversation here…"

They chuckled and he joined them lightly. They closed their eyes, remembering.

"You tried to encourage me to be happy with what I have," they said softly. "I had good food, friends. I think you had it in your head that the best option was just to never go to Asgore, to just live my life in peace down here. Again, I didn't want to correct you. Didn't want to point out how infeasible it was to try to live in peace when people like Undyne and Papyrus were tearing themselves apart, torn between duty and friendship. When several people wanted me dead. When my nature as a human was a landmine, that could cause huge disasters if anyone knew.

"But I think you were just… not wanting to think about it. Because it delayed the pain. From what you saw, there were only two paths. I live, and Asgore dies, and all hope for freedom goes with me. Or, I die, and…"

They trailed off, smiling at him sadly.

"I don't think I really need to lay out how you saw things, I guess," they said with a laugh, and he laughed a little in agreement, though it was a bit forced.

"It… it was this moment that I went from thinking of you as 'the funny friend' to… I don't know how to put it. You were so… melancholy. We'd hung out at Grillby's, and laughed together. I called Papyrus more in that timeline, and you kept popping in with ridiculous jokes.

"One, in hindsight, kills me - Papyrus was confused about what a laboratory was, and mixed it up with a labrador retriever, and asked if there were dogs in Alphys's lab, and you said we couldn't rule it out. I didn't get that till way later."

They grinned at him and his grin widened to match.

"But anyway," they continued. "We'd had all these good moments, and in facing me getting close to Asgore, you just… it obviously was upsetting you. And you didn't know what to do about it. And the fact that you cared enough to be shaken… well, it shook me, too. I felt afraid, in a way I hadn't been before. I mean, Undyne scared me, not gonna lie, but that was a fear of pain and setback. Once I fully realized I was immortal, it didn't take long before I became absolutely confident, you know? Doesn't matter how much I die, as long as I don't give up. And I just don't give up. Ever."

He nodded at that.

"But I still… I was certain I'd find a way. I knew I could go all the way back to the beginning. That somehow, I could make things right. What's the point of power like this, if I can't make things perfect?" they asked with a soft smile, yet with a resolution in their eyes that was hard as diamond and glittered just as brightly.

"So, you were all… melancholy. You told me you were rooting for me. And, I didn't realize it then, but that meant on some level you'd chosen for me to kill Asgore, because that's the only way you could see things going.

"Then you told me a story. A story of a door, deep in the woods of Snowdin forest. Of you being bored on sentry duty, and of knock knock jokes, and uproarious laughter. I knew immediately who you were speaking about, but I'd… grown silent. I hadn't known what to say from the beginning, and so I just… stayed silent.

"You told me of the promise you made. And then… I don't know if it was a moment of weakness, but it felt like all the barriers between us fell away. Like they'd been crumbling the whole time, and something about telling me about the promise, about the circumstances that led up to it broke them down the rest of the way."

Their gaze was distant as they spoke.

"You said to me, if she hadn't said anything, that I'd be dead where I stood," they said softly, and a chill went down his spine.

The look they gave him then was complicated, but warm and affectionate.

"The barriers popped right back up," they said with a gentle smile. "You pretended you'd just been joking with me. Didn't fool me, of course, not for a minute. But it was… it was real in a way that's hard to articulate…"

They trailed off, thinking.

"It sounds like a bad thing, right?" they asked finally, with a little laugh. "But… I'm trying my best to say this right… but it wasn't. It's not like I didn't know that half of monsterkind wanted me dead. The silly teenagers in the alley shop just over there openly brag about how they're hyped for the destruction of humanity. Half the monsters I've met have tried to kill or capture me. But it's not like they're evil. They just want freedom, and they see me as a means to an end.

"And you're…" they said, trailing off again for a moment. "You were obviously trying to share with me your own tangled up feelings. That you wanted freedom, and had the power to make it happen. That you are someone who is bound by promises, and will sacrifice something you really want, for a promise. I didn't fully grasp how much promises meant to you until later, of course, but I got a glimpse then. And that… if the promise were all that bound you, you'd secretly want me to lose against Asgore. That you could justify things, say you tried to protect me by trying to talk me into just living here peacefully, but secretly wanting me to die. But that wasn't the case.

"Despite what you wanted, despite what you had the power to do, despite it all… you were rooting for me, in the end. And you felt all tangled up and frustrated and melancholic about it, and you just didn't know what to do. You expanded on that, too, in the Hall of Judgement, later. About how, if it were you, you'd have thrown in the towel by then, but that you hoped that somehow, someway, I'd find a way forward, if I kept trying. That I'd inspired you to have a spark of hope, too."

He leaned back a little, thinking, and they let him have a moment.

"sounds like you are pretty observant yourself," he said eventually.

"Not nearly as much as you," they said with a grin.

"don't sell yourself short," he said, grinning back. "i gotta admit, it's weird. the stuff you're saying, it sounds right. sounds like what i'd say, what i'd do. in watching you, i can even kinda see it. the things you've done, the implications of it all - i'd have noticed how determined you were, how committed you were to peace. i'd have wanted there to be some way for things to work out."

"But you feel differently about things?" they asked tentatively.

"not exactly? yes? i dunno," he said with a sigh. "i do want things to work out peacefully. obviously. but this time, you already told me that there's a way. don't understand what it is, but i'm not worried about that impossible choice, like i would have been before. like i was, this morning.

"i'm not feeling torn up in the same way. but i s'pose this is the place for confessions, so what the hell. i have no idea what to feel about you, kid."

Their face was tight.

"Because of how I killed everyone," they said. It wasn't a question.

"not just that," he said. "though that is part of it. but you really do seem honestly committed to doing the right thing, so i do believe you about your reasons. and you're right that, if no one gets hurt in the end, it's not as bad as it sounds. but it's still complicated."

"So what's bothering you, then?" they asked.

He sighed.

"you remember things that i don't," he said. "you remember conversations we've had. you feel things because of that. me telling you about that promise changed our relationship for both of us… but also, only for you. i was never there for that. i never made the choice to tell you. the person you became friends with doesn't exist anymore."

They flinched and their eyes filled with tears. They swallowed.

"i'm not saying… look, i'm sorry, kid," he said, shaking his head. "i'm not saying i have a problem with being your friend. i've been watching your journey, and i'm rooting for ya, too. but it's weird, y'know? like, the way you feel about me… it's uneven. i'm saying this all wrong."

He sighed.

"i dunno if i should even say anything more," he muttered.

"Please do," they said. "I want to know. I want this version of you to be forever, to never make the memories one sided again. And… I want to know, rather than guess, about what our friendship is."

"well. i guess that's fair," he said with another sigh. "look, part of the trouble i'm having is trying to keep up. and it's guesswork on my end, too. you have a lot more information than i do. on what you feel, especially regarding me, and why you might feel that way. i'm trying to piece together the journey. where we had started, where we ended up."

"Would you want me to tell you that, first? How I feel about you? How that has developed on my journey?" they asked softly, their throat tight.

He hadn't planned to actually ask - he was just revealing a problem. But if they were offering…

"it's kinda selfish to ask," he said. "but yeah."

"Are you sure you want to know?" they said, their voice sounding a little pained. "I don't want to make you uncomfortable. But I refuse to lie to you."

"i… might already have a good idea," he said. "but guesses might not be doing us any favors. and i've been doing a lot of guessing."

"So you're certain," they pressed. "Really, for sure. Because I really, really don't want to make you feel pressured in any way, shape, or form."

"i'm sure," he said.

They nodded and then looked thoughtful.

"One last question," they said. "I just realized, I'm not sure if you want the… whole story, or if you just wanted a sort of overview."

"i'm in no hurry," he said. "tell me the whole thing."

Besides, an overview would be dependent on him trusting in their self appraisal of the situation. Which he didn't. He didn't know them nearly well enough. Walking him through it would absolutely give him more knowledge. And with an immortal being who was this mentally messed up and this powerful? Yeah, more was better.

They took a breath and swallowed.

"At first, I was terrified of you," they said, closing their eyes. "As you stalked me through the Snowdin forest. Man, that was some whiplash when you greeted me with the whoopie cushion like that. I had no idea what to think. And then the whole little dance with you and Papyrus - he scared me, too. I was feeling very… very… I don't know how to put it. Vulnerable. I'd been rescued by Toriel, and had had some really… emotionally complicated experiences. And having to say goodbye to her like that, I… I don't know what to say, other than really vulnerable."

He did kinda feel like a jerk, hearing that. He'd wanted to push them, to see who they were, but hadn't thought that the human might have been in a fragile state on coming through the door. With his knock knock buddy caring about humans, he kinda figured they'd already be used to monsters being friendly.

"And other than being a hilarious asshole with the terrifying stalking joke, you made me feel safe. I latched onto that feeling hard. I didn't know if you'd kill me. Or Papyrus. Or anyone else. I'd only died once by then, and was still scared of dying again. Or of my powers failing me. But you were really nice to me. You knew I was human and gave me no trouble about it. No threats, no attacks, nothing. The worst you threatened me with was making me listen to your jokes, and I kinda wanted to just sit next to you and cry and listen, because you made me laugh and feel safe and like maybe things would be okay. But I was also scared of scaring you away with my sheer awkwardness, so I just pressed on."

So they actually cared about him from the very start? His heart twinged, hearing this. Rather than the untouchable, unshakable creature of fearless immortality and might he'd seen in this timeline… they'd been a scared kid, trembling as they sought joy and laughter in his company.

But there was one problem with this story.

"hang on," he said. "if you were this scared… why did you leave the ruins?"

They looked down, looking ashamed.

"Toriel invited me to stay with her," they said. "She was really sweet and everything. But, um. I… I can't. I couldn't. She's wonderful, but also kind of smothering, and I can't handle feeling trapped. I felt I had no choice."

"possibly dying was better?" Sans asked.

"It's hard to describe," they said. "Possibly dying was awful. Possibly having my power fail me was awful. But all that was just… just a chance. There was a glimpse of hope through that, that somehow I'd find a future that works for me. And staying was guaranteed… being trapped, I guess. I can't, I just can't turn away from a thread of possibility like that. Ever. No matter how scared I am."

He nodded thoughtfully, and they continued after a moment.

"During this time I died, as I said. Not against Doggo, but against all the other dogs. Greater Dog killed me twice. Mostly because, back then, I'd get so scared, I'd just freeze and couldn't move and just… uselessly shook until their magic ripped me apart. In the ruins, at first I reacted to my fear by lashing out and killing them, but I undid that. Then after, I often had no idea what to do, so I just froze, since I refused to kill anybody."

His heart was twinging again. Previously, he'd struggled to reconcile the peaceful determination with the dusty warpath. Now, he was struggling to reconcile the fearless, immortal master of combat with a kid who literally let themself be killed because they were too afraid to move.

"But even as they killed me, I knew, I could see it, they didn't actually want to. Okay, Doggo kinda did, but I literally just had to stand still and I'd be fine. And I guess Dogamy and Dogaressa sorta did, too, but… they were so clearly just following orders, and were being good dogs, you know?"

He nodded at that. Despite everything, they'd continued to feel empathy for their own killers. Over and over again.

"And I kept running into you in the forest. And every time I saw you, I relaxed a little. I never knew when Papyrus was going to move from traps to attacking me. Everyone hurt me. And the dogs were so cute and sweet, and even they ripped me to shreds, and it hurt, and I was so, so afraid.

"And then I'd see you, and I just… started to have hope that I'd be okay. Because you'd be there, laughing and smiling, and telling me jokes, and no monsters approached while I was talking to you. Being near you was a safe little bubble. A little place of laughter and joy. I appreciated you so much. Even so, you were just 'the funny friend.' The first friend. I mean, I cared about Toriel, too - still do - but with her, it's more like a mom than a friend. But you treated me like a friend, and not like a threat, or a prize, or anything."

He wasn't sure this was all that healthy either, but it did just sound like an honest, if unusually intense, feeling of friendship. And honestly… that was a role he'd be happy with. To be a figure of hope, joy, and laughter? His own heart ached at the thought of it. It seemed… healing, even, to be viewed that way.

"The first time I went down to the cave by the cliff, and saw you… it's hard to describe. You were doing a ridiculous thing of teleporting just out of my sight, and I had no idea what you were doing, or how you seemed to be in two places at once. The one thing I was sure of is that you had some measure of power, and it felt… nice.

"I mean, I'd already seen glimpses of it, like you saying you'd see me up ahead and then walking the wrong way. But that was the first blatant thing. And yeah, it was played for laughs, but it made me feel like… like someone strong was my friend. Like you had my back, and you were strong enough that that meant something."

They paused for a moment, thinking.

It was a generous interpretation of events. That his teleportation trick also meant he was strong in other ways… though, he supposed, they seemed insightful, too. Maybe not the same way he was, but they'd picked up a hell of a lot of subtext from what they'd said of their previous conversation here.

But this also warmed his heart. To be a thing of joy, laughter, hope, safety, to feel like they could trust him… that felt good.

"My determination, in those earliest moments, was born of fear," they said. "I was so, so afraid of death. I was also afraid of becoming something that I would hate, and clung to who I am. Especially since I'd accidentally killed Toriel… the guilt of that… it terrified me, what I could do. All that said… Sans, if you'd betrayed me then, I think I would have broken. I think my fear would have transformed from driving me, to consuming me."

He nodded at that solemnly.

"But you didn't," they said, smiling at him warmly. "I slowly grew accustomed to death, and stopped being so afraid. I'm not sure when I stopped being so afraid of Papyrus. I think… if I'm remembering right, I'd already started to suspect he really didn't want to hurt me, by the time we reached his 'gauntlet of deadly terror.' And so I felt vindicated in that little belief when he refused to activate it. Felt a measure of safety with him. Still wasn't sure if he'd kill me eventually, but at least I felt sure he didn't really want to."

He'd reassured them that Papyrus was safe because he'd known they could conclude he was a threat, but deep down, he had a hard time seeing Papyrus that way. And it sounded like, even in Snowdin town, they were still afraid of him, in that first timeline.

"In Snowdin town, it was so nice. So peaceful. No one attacked me, accidentally or otherwise. Guess the monsters living in the woods are less polite or something - honestly, I'm still not sure what's up with that. And I guess I'm getting sidetracked, but I think it's relevant. But I started to feel more safe, more at peace. It wasn't just you that made me feel safe. The whole town started to feel that way. And then I left, and ran into Papyrus, and he insisted on fighting me. On striking me. On hurting me. And I was so sure, because of what happened with the dogs, and with Toriel's warning about Asgore, that if I surrendered, he'd kill me."

His face was tight as he nodded again. Papyrus wouldn't, of course, but to conclude that… yeah, it made sense.

"I think, because I'd started to feel safe, that I'd grown a little less numb. I was so scared again. I didn't want him to hurt me. I didn't want to die and reappear, only to have to do it all over again, caught in an endless cycle of death and pain. It didn't take long for him to strike me down. I felt myself growing weak, and a series of bones came flying at me, and I didn't know how to dodge them. I closed my eyes, accepting that it was over… and then they stopped. As soon as the strike started to land, and he'd seen that I'd given up, he actually pulled back his attack. He refused to kill me."

The smile on their face was that same admiring, impossibly tender look as they'd given Papyrus during the fight he'd witnessed. He felt a surge of pride in his brother, because he was cool.

"He picked me up and put me into the garage with some dog food and stuff, which was so ridiculous. And of course, with bars too wide to keep me inside. I just laid there and cried for a while. But he'd mentioned someone coming and taking me, so I still needed to leave. But I realized I wasn't afraid of him at all anymore. I had two people I could feel safe with. Not completely, in his case - he was still trying to capture me - but I can't tell you how important that was to me.

"And his attacks didn't hurt all that much, either. He was trying to batter me into submission, not torture me. At the time, I didn't realize how… variable magical attacks could be. Your bones would rip through my life and body both, but his just tore at my life as they passed, leaving nothing but maybe some tender skin and bruising. I went into the fight with him again, full of food in my pockets and determination in my heart. He wouldn't kill me. I wouldn't kill him. And maybe I could actually learn to fight, to dodge and weave, if I weren't so afraid."

His eyes widened. The first time they started to actually learn to fight was with Papyrus?

That was so cool.

"Long story short, he beat me twice more. But each time, I got way, way better at fighting. I mean, I'd learned a lot with Toriel and the other monsters, too, but this was different. Like, with Toriel, she actually guided her attacks to not hit me, once I got really hurt, so I couldn't even practice anymore. But anyway. I wasn't attacking him, so I couldn't exactly win, but he was starting to get worn out."

Papyrus had been training hard. It made him smile to hear that they'd struggled against him.

"In the end, though, from the conversation we were having during the fight, as well as before each fight, he just… didn't want to fight me. He wanted friendship instead. And I accepted, and we hung out, and it was great. And then, as I went to leave Snowdin, I realized… I had a place where I felt safe. And it was because of you both. You, more than Papyrus, because of how… I really don't have the words… but it felt like a deeper connection."

"kinda curious why you didn't just stay in snowdin, in that case," he said.

"Papyrus's boss wanted to kill me, and he was obviously feeling torn up about it," they said immediately. "The dogs had orders to kill me, and they were really not subtle about that. If they knew I was human, my peace would shatter. The townsfolk had no idea I was human. They'd have been afraid of me, if they knew. Or hated me. It wasn't a stable situation. As long as I played it careful, it was okay, but it was… fragile. But, even knowing who and what I am, I had you and your brother. I had to move forward, to try to find… some sort of resolution to the situation, some sort of stability. If I could convince Asgore to let me stay in peace, to call off the orders to kill me, I would have gone back and stayed in Snowdin. Happily. And despite the difficulties ahead of me, I knew that if I had to reload, if I had to come back, I had some people who I felt like I could trust, even knowing the truth."

He nodded at that. They'd even basically mentioned as much a minute ago, when talking about their conversation in this restaurant last time. Apparently, they'd felt that way from the very beginning.

"Of course, I couldn't actually trust Papyrus that much," they said with a laugh. "But I'm getting ahead of myself. So, then I ran into you, and you invited me to hang with you at Grillby's. I accepted, of course. You asked me what I thought about Papyrus, and we commiserated about how cool he is for a bit. Then you did a crazy thing, and it looked like you froze time, to ask me about a flower. I was certain you were talking about Flowey, at first, who caused me some… issues… back in the Ruins. But then you said you thought someone was pranking Papyrus with an echo flower, and I was so unsure what to do or say, I kinda just stayed quiet. You warned me to be careful, and then let the timefreeze slip away. It reaffirmed what I'd already concluded, about your strength."

Sounded like there was a recurring theme, where he said something that wasn't exactly right, and they didn't want to correct him. He grumbled to himself inside his head. Made him wonder what he'd missed in this timeline…

"I think that's when it felt really solid. You were my friend. I felt like I could trust you, you were strong, and maybe you wouldn't fight for me or anything, but I felt like… like I could rely on you. That sense of safety went from tentative to solid. I felt less afraid, as I went into Waterfall."

He smiled at that.

"Then, of course, I immediately ran into the grass and overheard a conversation between Papyrus and Undyne, where she pressed him and he agreed to betray me to her, that he'd do what was necessary," they said with a wry laugh and he flinched a little. "Don't get me wrong, he very obviously didn't want to, he tried to persuade her to change her course. But, well, my faith in my friendship with him cracked pretty hard at that. It went back to being you, alone in all the world, that I felt I could trust."

He had to admit, that made sense. Except one part.

"not toriel?" he asked.

They hesitated.

"When I left, she told me to never return," they said. "Far as I can tell, she couldn't handle the idea of waiting to hear from me, and slowly deciding I had been killed by Asgore as time passed without me visiting her. By forbidding me to ever contact her again, she could willfully delude herself into thinking I'd survived, as the only way for her to feel like she could… she could survive the grief of my death. Knowing that she was just deluding herself, but an irrational hope is better than confirmation of loss, is what I think she was thinking. So, while she had my back, she absolutely refused to be there for me, in absolutely any way."

He nodded slowly. It backed up the idea that they were insightful into who people really were.

"I don't want to give the wrong idea," they said. "She did care. Does care. She gave me a hug and everything as I was leaving, and she is so sweet. But she's dealt with a lot of loss and grief. I had no idea how much, at the time, but even then, I could see it in her eyes."

He'd definitely heard the same thing in her voice, the day she'd begged him to make the promise.

"Waterfall was awful, that first timeline," they said, their voice somber. "Papyrus got my number and kept calling, and kept clearly struggling with trying to balance not betraying me or Undyne, but in the end betraying us both. I knew he cared and didn't want to hurt me, I couldn't expect him to betray his boss and friend, I didn't really blame him… but it was… hard. She even outright admitted that she was going to murder me herself, and while he protested, he just… accepted it. And I went through and met all these monsters, and heard all these wishes, and I just…"

They trailed off, their eyes glistening.

"All these dreams, these wishes, that could be fulfilled if I just died," they said softly. "I found myself wondering if wanting to live was being selfish. If it would be better if I just let Undyne kill me, and let everyone go free. I hadn't learned, yet, that Asgore planned genocide of humanity with the captured souls.

"But I didn't want to die, and I didn't think it was fair, and they weren't even respecting me in it. They didn't plead their case and ask me to sacrifice myself for them, they just wanted to kill me and I didn't want to die for them if that was the case, but I was surrounded by all these wishes and they were just…"

They went from a rambling flurry of words to trailing off, tears glistening in their eyes.

"But I didn't want to die," they said, and sounded almost ashamed. "I didn't, I didn't, it wasn't fair to just steal my soul like that… and Undyne scared me so much. Every time I ran into you in Waterfall, it was like a salve on my soul. You wouldn't make me feel guilty for being alive. You would make me laugh. I had no idea what goofy thing you'd do, but I knew it'd be silly and safe and that, at least for those moments we were hanging out, everything was going to be okay. I couldn't know if I'd survive the next hour, if I'd be battered with so much pain and such overwhelming defeat that I'd die for real, but I knew for at least those few minutes, that I was okay."

He was getting a hell of a lot more than their feelings for him, but he definitely wasn't blind to the implication. He was increasingly of the opinion that he'd find out they fell in love with him even before the murder timeline.

And his feelings were changing, too. Yeah, they were an unstoppable nightmare of limitless power now, if they chose to be, but he really felt for the kid they'd been. He could easily see how he'd have felt, seeing their fear and uncertainty transform into contented laughter at his jokes. He would have grown to care for them quite a lot.

"Finally, I got to the end, and Undyne killed me a ton. But, I'd learned how to fight with Papyrus, and had had a chance to practice with the monsters of Waterfall. She only killed me a dozen times or so. It really helps that the food here instantly heals me. And, while I was afraid… the bullshit she said when she first attacked me, it really changed how I felt. I still wasn't sure if I should let myself die to save monsters, but I found myself pissed off and committed to one thing I knew for sure - if someone was going to take my soul, it wouldn't be that bitch."

Sans couldn't help but laugh at that.

"I'm really a lot better at fighting when I'm not afraid," they said. "And the stuff she said, I was just furious. And… and I did something awful. Not being afraid, my fear all burning as anger, and her being just so… so unfair, so cruel. She'd hurt me, and stalked me, and ambushed me, and insulted me, and mocked my efforts to be good to monsterkind, and turned a friend against me, and was trying so hard to murder me, and refused to back down and accept peace…"

He nodded. Not that surprising an outcome - it's honestly what he'd expect to happen.

"I killed her," they said, sighing sadly. "It's sad, Sans, how much easier it is to kill monsters than spare them. It was right after she'd killed me once, I killed her on my first try."

He knew damned well how hard humans were to kill in combat. Without leveraging the power of stolen human souls or special training, it was definitely in the humans' favor.

"And then, the things she said as she died… it was so sad, Sans. She didn't actually care about me at all. She spoke of the things she'd wished she'd said, of the people she loved. Of her refusal to die, her refusal to stop protecting them. She… you know about determination, about all of Alphys's secret experiments, I'm pretty sure."

"yeah," he confirmed.

"She had enough determination that she melted," they said softly and he nodded. "She tried so hard to live, to continue to fight for those she loved. And I didn't matter to her at all. That's when I realized, really understood, she wasn't actually insulting me, or attacking me. I was nothing but an idea. I had to be, because if I were a person to her, an innocent person, she couldn't hurt me. But if I were just 'the enemy,' then she could pretend she was being a hero, like she really is deep down. And then, there I was, once she eventually turned to dust. I had a straight path forward, and she could never hurt me again."

They smiled, and once again, it was impossibly tender.

"But I reloaded instead," they said. "From Undyne, I had learned to have true faith in myself. I could get past her. Not just as a belief, but as a certainty. The question was, could I keep her alive at the same time? I tried a few different things, but in the end, I figured out that I could outrun her. And maybe, since she'd stopped when Monster Kid stood up to her, maybe if I just ran enough, I could find another solution. She'd catch up to me, and attack again, but I'd just keep running. I was grinning all the while. And you know what happened next - I just repeated it this time."

He nodded again.

"I know it sounds like I got off track," they said. "But the key thing is, I suddenly felt safe, in a strange way. I had faith in my power, and in my ability to become strong enough to overcome whatever I faced. And before that, you were my only source of security and safety. Yes, yes, people would try to murder me, and that would suck, but it didn't matter. I had someone who had my back, who was a real friend, and I had faith would never betray me. And I had another friend who… maybe was tangled, but still cared. And that maybe, just maybe, things would actually be okay. I felt stable, and our friendship was a part of that stability. But more in the sense of… equals isn't the right word, but I don't know a better one. I didn't feel like I was leaning on you, the same way."

That made a lot of sense. It was interesting, hearing about the fight with Undyne, too. It revealed a lot about them.

And… this sounded like it was a healthy foundation for a friendship, now. Maybe not perfectly, but hey, who was he to complain about imperfect mental health?

"There wasn't much between us in Hotland," they said. "Dealt with bullshit with Alphys and Mettaton, but with my newfound confidence in myself and faith in my power, his death threats didn't really get to me at all. A little, but he was more annoying than frightening."

Sans snickered at that.

"He is a pain in the ass," they said with a grin. "Had a few cool moments with you in Hotlands. Like with the hotdogs… I'm so glad we were able to do that again, it was so much fun. And it really didn't… change anything about how I felt about you. I just felt, again, solid in our friendship. And every interaction just reinforced that feeling."

They suddenly hesitated and gave him a complex look. Their voice had grown solid and cheerful as they spoke, but that didn't match the expression they now wore.

"Then… our conversation here," they said, their voice suddenly a little uncertain. Uncertain, but resolute. "Reaffirming what I'd grown to believe, that you were truly my friend, that you did care, that you were on my side. Reaffirming what I'd learned, that you were a being of power. Telling me of a promise, a story that shared the heart of your connection to Toriel, and not the mere truth that there was a promise. A feeling of real connection, for all that there was an implicit threat within your words.

"And, the part I forgot to mention a minute ago, that you made a comment about how you were doing a good job protecting me, because I hadn't died yet. And I just laughed…"

They grinned at him and he grinned sheepishly back.

Then their expression got tangled again and they looked rather sheepish themself.

"Er… this is where it kinda gets awkward," they admit. "But you asked, and so I'll answer."

They took a steadying breath and looked away.

"I… I felt a really strong sense of connection, as I'd mentioned," they said. "But, um, it kinda was… a, um… whoo, this is hard…"

They were really struggling. He figured it wouldn't hurt to help get the words out. And, as he'd said, he had guessed. Plus, on the off chance they denied it, it was completely plausible as a teasing joke.

"you started to fall in love with me," Sans said, as they continued to struggle in the silence.

They flushed a bright red and took a moment to breathe. They slowly nodded.

It felt better, to be honest, knowing that they'd fallen for him before their murderous timeline. That their feelings were born of joy, laughter, friendship, and a real sense of connection, not out of desperate guilt.

And hearing it like this… he could see it. Walking him through their journey made it feel real. It wasn't as real as if he'd been there himself, lived it himself, but it wasn't as impossible to feel as before. He even found himself caring for the person that they'd been, caring more deeply for them now, because of that deeper understanding.

Not that he loved them, not even slightly, but… the situation maybe wasn't as messed up as he'd first felt.

They continued to steady their breathing and finally spoke again.

"I only started to," they said. "Somewhere around the feeling of 'best friends forever,' a feeling of loyalty, and, I guess you'd call it a crush. As before… everyone else, even Toriel, had hurt me, attacked me, killed me, betrayed me, turned away from me, or pushed me away. Except you. It's hard to describe the feeling of trust, why it was so deeply rooted. On the surface, I've literally never had a fight of any kind. Not so much as a spar. I've never had to so much as question my safety. Why, then, did I feel a sense of safety and trust with you that ran so much deeper than anything I'd ever known on the surface?"

They quirked a lip into a half smile.

"It'd probably take a lot of time to try to untangle why that is, but the important part is that that's how I felt," they said. "I felt a depth of trust and care for you that I'd never really felt in my life. I didn't have the best home life and don't actually have a real home to go back to."

He nodded at that.

"I guess I could go back, but let's just say that at the end, Toriel offers to take me in as her child, and I accepted, and intend to accept again."

He could read between the lines, hear the complexity in their voice, see the depth on their face…

He reached out and squeezed their hand. They smiled at him appreciatively, squeezing back, and he pulled his hand back after a moment.

"Not much changed from there for a while. Oh, things happened in my journey, but not regarding my feelings for you. And then I reached the Hall of Judgement."

He wondered if he'd ever tell them that wasn't the corridor's name.

"You started off so serious," they said, their gaze distant. "Like this was… maybe like it was the one job you took seriously. You made me feel like I was really, actually being judged for the choices I'd made on my journey. And for a moment, I was a little worried. Only a little, though. Yeah, I'd killed Toriel and Undyne, however briefly, but that had never happened. And I'd tried so, so hard to do the right thing."

Their smile softened.

"You told me about LOVE and EXP. What they meant. How they worked. You made it explicitly clear that you were judging me, how you were judging me."

Their face lit up into a happy expression.

"And then, you shifted so I could see your face properly in the light, and you were giving me this… this… really sweet smile," they said. "That's so not the right word. You were so nice. You said I kept tenderness in my heart, that I strove to do the right thing, that I'd refused to hurt anyone. You talked about how I'd never gained LOVE, but I'd gained love. And I had, actually, gained some LOVE - just long enough to feel it, before I reloaded. But I was free of all that, and that's what you saw. And I felt… I felt…"

They struggled with words again and he considered. His other self had probably no idea that they'd intentionally killed Undyne and undone it, but in the end… he couldn't blame them for that. Hell, he wouldn't have really blamed them for killing Undyne and keeping things that way. He would have judged them for the LOVE they'd gained, but he wouldn't have hated them. Wouldn't have stopped being their friend. Just been disappointed that life wasn't as good as it could be, which was hardly news anyway.

"I really don't have the words," they continued. "Just, let's go with it was a positive thing. I felt seen, appreciated, respected. In a way that felt both professional and objective, as well as personal and caring.

"And then, you left it off with talking about what came next. You didn't know what I should do. You laid out the facts of my choice in simple, clear fashion. That Asgore and I would meet, and we'd determine the fate of the world. That if I refused to fight, Asgore would take my soul and destroy humanity. Or, I could kill him, take his soul, and leave, consigning monsterkind to remaining trapped.

"You said you didn't know what I should do, that if you were me, you'd have thrown in the towel. You talked about how I'd gotten that far by never giving up, that I had 'determination.' That you believed if I didn't give up, I'd find a way to do the right thing, even if you had no idea how. You said everyone was counting on me and wished me luck, then you disappeared."

It hurt a little to hear this. If he didn't know the kid had found a way, then things would have looked pretty bleak. They did look that way, this morning, but he'd been trying not to think about it. Let the cards fall where they would, kind of thing.

But that Sans had run out of time to refuse to face things. He'd grown to care for the human kid and just let them go off to deal with an impossible situation. He'd tried to persuade them to just live a peaceful life underground, and failing that… there was only death and loss. Whose death and whose loss, he didn't know, but it looked inevitable.

And that Sans had chosen to cling to a little measure of hope. That the kid's power, their determination, their unwavering commitment to peace… that maybe it would somehow be enough.

"and you did it," Sans said. "you found a way."

"No, actually," they said with a wry smile. "It's a really long story. But, I tried really, really hard against Asgore. He was the nicest about it, about trying to kill me, of any monster I'd faced. He obviously didn't want to kill me. And I didn't want to kill him either.

"I tried everything, Sans. I really did. I just couldn't persuade him. I got to the point of getting really good at dodging his attacks, but he still kept killing me because I just could not get him to stop. I had no idea what else to do, what else to try. I'd found things I could say that would weaken him, that would soften his strikes, but I couldn't make him stop trying to kill me."

They sighed.

"I had no idea what to do," they admitted. "But then, I remembered. Toriel, Undyne… as they'd died, they had time to say some things. I learned from both of them in their last moments. And, it maybe sounds bad, but it occurred to me… maybe I could try attacking him. Maybe he'd give up when he was almost dead, or maybe he'd reveal something when he died that I could use, something. I wouldn't keep him dead, but I had no idea what else to try."

Sans nodded at that. He couldn't blame them for that, either. From his perspective, Asgore made it morally acceptable to kill him, even if it wasn't ideal - temporarily killing him as a desperate tactic to find a better way seemed downright saintly, compared to the two alternatives.

"So I attacked him, and wore him down," they said. "And in the end, he did collapse before his death, and said he couldn't take it anymore. Asked me to kill him and just go home, and let this be over. And I refused, because of course I refused to kill him, I was so glad he'd stopped trying to kill me! Kinda riduculous I had to beat him within an inch of his life to get him to stop, but whatever. He started talking about how he'd adopt me, and we could be a family and it was so sweet…"

They sighed.

"And then Flowey pops up, murders him, and mocks me as he takes all the human souls that Asgore had prepared, absorbed them all, and attacked me with a power of an effective god."

"... that was abrupt," Sans said.

"I agree," they said emphatically. "I cannot begin to tell you how pissed I was at Flowey. I'd finally found an answer I could be happy with, even if it wasn't completely ideal, and that stupid asshole…"

Anger flashed in their eyes and Sans couldn't help but grin. It'd be less funny if he didn't know it turned out alright.

"you mentioned he killed you an insane number of times," Sans said. "that you expected it to happen again, in this timeline."

"Yep," they said. "It's… complicated, but Flowey normally remembers resets, but um… he doesn't remember this. I guess I'll mention why in a bit. But anyway, yeah, he was able to take over the save and reload power, he was able to destroy my 'save file,' he called it - the ability to go back to a chosen point. Though I think what happened is that he gained the ability to have multiple save files, and just broke my connection to it. He blocked me from resetting the timeline. But, for some reason, he couldn't stop me from existing. No matter how many times he killed me, I'd just come back. I knew - somehow, deep in my bones, that if I accepted my death, he'd take my soul and that'd be that. But, like with Undyne…"

"someone might get your soul at some point, but it wouldn't be that asshole," Sans finished with an amused grin.

"You got it," they said, laughing. "By that point, I'd gotten pretty used to pain and death, and I was kinda running on anger. Murdering Asgore like that… I was so pissed, Sans, I cannot even begin to express it."

He nodded, feeling a sense of satisfaction just from hearing this story. Again, it really helped that he knew it turned out well.

"Long story short, I was able to reach out to the other human souls, who did not like being used like that, and they turned on him," they said.

That was very interesting. It was dangerous to use lots of human souls at once, because of the issue of souls refusing to be controlled, but he didn't realise a living human could influence them. But it usually took a while before they went wild - even without any special training, it was generally close to half an hour. He wondered if those souls also "remembered" the resets, how the power interacted with them.

That'd be an interesting thing to study, but wasn't even slightly practical to try to set up.

"Long, ludicrously violent story short, by the way. It was a whole thing. I legitimately have no idea how many times I died. Especially since he knew I, like him, could remember the resets, so after a while, he just started loading right as I started to die so he could kill me again faster."

"... that's torture," Sans said. "even if you'd given up…"

"Pretty confident if I said I gave up, he'd have let me die," they said, shrugging. "Didn't matter, because fuck that guy."

Sans had to agree. No wonder they'd warned him about Flowey. He suddenly frowned.

"it'd be a really bad thing if he overheard any of this, wouldn't it?" Sans said uneasily. He didn't notice anything, but…

They laughed.

"That's probably true," they said. "But I don't think that's an issue. He revealed, at one point, that he has issues with you. Insulted you, said you'd caused him more than his fair share of resets, and that he doesn't like to be anywhere near you."

Sans grinned darkly at that, and they matched him.

"Anyway, I'm getting sidetracked," they said. "None of this has anything to do with our relationship."

"gotta admit, i'm curious," he admitted.

They chuckled and nodded.

"I'll keep going then. So, after he was betrayed by the souls he was controlling, he lost all the power and was a flower again. But weak, broken, and helpless before me. And I realized I could easily kill him."

"did you?" Sans asked, honestly unsure.

"I seriously thought about it," they said, their eyes hard. "And I realized I had basically two options before me. I could just accept things the way they were, and not reload. If I was going to do that, then yeah, killing him made sense. And frankly, as much as I wanted to kill him, that's what I'd do, if I accepted that path.

"On the other hand, if I was going to reload… then killing him didn't make sense. He'd come back, and more importantly, he'd remember. And if he was going to remember, then I'd want him to remember mercy. Because I needed to try to find some sort of peace - between the power he had, even as just a flower, and the ability to remember across resets? That's dangerous. And it's not like I had any idea of how to solve things myself. He might be able to help, and mercy was the only path forward that I could see."

They smiled.

"I chose hope," they said. "Hope for a brighter future. Flowey was nasty as hell as I spared him, but it mostly turned out that he was struggling with the concept and eventually ran away in his confusion. And then… it's weird. I don't know where I was. My best guess is I was caught in some sort of void, something to do with the backlash of the situation with Flowey. I could have reloaded, but I wanted to figure out what was going on, first.

"Then I got a call from you. A voicemail. I think I was dead, but my soul was bound to Flowey in some weird way, and he could communicate with me, and had decided to share this message. And for some reason, I was still aware and stuff - probably relating to the metric ton of magic that had been flying around - so I didn't just automatically reload, since my consciousness was still kicking around. But I could feel it, I still had the power, so even though I was confused, I wasn't afraid."

Sans had no idea what to make of that. But then, it sounded like the kid didn't, either.

"Anyway," they said. "You told me about how things were in my absence. About a Snowman that was happy with me, because I'd brought the Snowpiece so far. About all sorts of things. Like, Toriel reclaimed her place as queen, and all of the human souls had disappeared. Papyrus noticed you were leaving a message and joined in, too. And Undyne joined in, and just hearing about everything… It was a whole thing, and was so sweet. I felt like I was missed, and loved, and that you hoped I was okay, wherever I was."

He nodded again.

"Not just you, but everyone," they said. "I felt… really sad about how things went. And still had no idea where I was. And then Flowey appeared within the void, as soon as your voicemail was over, talking to me. He seemed much more mellow and real with me than he'd ever been. He said he had an idea of how to get a better ending. I was suspicious, of course, but I listened. He said he thought that getting to know Alphys better might be the key to my happiness.

"He started to leave then, but I got him to stay a little longer. I tried to get him talking. He talked a little about Papyrus - joking that my interest in him was about me wanting to make a Flowey Fan Club, but Papyrus had already done that. Then, about how much fun Papyrus is to mess with. That's when he mentioned you. Called you 'Smiley Trashbag,' and said I needed to keep away from you, that you were dangerous, because you'd caused him so many resets."

They grinned again, wicked delight flashing in their eyes. Sans couldn't help but match them.

"It entertained the hell out of me, him warning me about the one person I trusted more than anyone else in the world. But it didn't matter, really, if he was telling the truth or not. I mean, I figured he was telling the truth about you, but I mean about the happy ending. Even with the six souls, he couldn't stop me from existing, so my confidence was rock solid. I was willing to try, and it didn't matter if he betrayed me, because I still wouldn't give up."

Sans nodded at that. The fearless immortal had arrived in full.

"Long story short," they said. "He got Papyrus to get Undyne to give Alphys a letter, dragging me in as the one to send it, and this was a series of dominos that got Alphys to admit to what she'd done, inviting us in to see the true lab. I can only imagine how many resets were involved in learning about that chain, and in such a way that he thought it'd still work even with my being involved… but that's beside the point. I went down, learned a shit ton. About determination, about the amalgamates, about Flowey's origin-"

"wait, his origin?" Sans asked, not wanting to skip their insights on this point.

"Yeah, he was the flower vessel that Alphys was doing experiments on, and he gained - or regained - awareness when he was combined with the dust of the fallen prince, Asriel, from Asgore's garden, when she returned him there," they said casually.

"... right then," Sans said, reeling a little.

He was glad that he'd stopped them. He knew about the flower, but not about the connection with Asriel. What the hell was that all about?

"You should really ask about Asriel's history," they encouraged. "I bet Alphys knows it. I can take a nap in the hotel while you guys chat, if you want."

"uh, actually, i talked to alphys about it while we were waiting for you to get to muffet."

"Oh, cool. So she watched the fight, too? Hopefully it was fun to watch," they said with a grin.

"you definitely know how to handle being dangled in a web," he said.

"Ha! Yeah I do," they agreed, looking smug. "So yeah, I learned a lot. Chara poked out, too, during that time. I bet they also did when I killed Undyne and when I considered killing Flowey, but I was… kinda in tune with them, if you will, so I didn't notice. That's my guess, anyway. But this time, I was face to face with horror and wasn't feeling it, so I really noticed Chara then."

He was still curious about the whole Asriel thing, but he was also curious about this… whatever, he could ask questions later.

"Anyway, long story. Went back to Asgore, Flowey blocked me from leaving New Home so I had nowhere else to go, and it turned out, Flowey had managed to lure everyone I cared about there. You, Papyrus, Toriel, Alphys, Undyne. A few others, too, like Mettaton. Flowey grabbed the six human souls that Asgore had prepared while we were distracted, and instead of using that power to focus on me, captured all of you. He tormented me a little bit, but you guys were breaking free, trying to protect me, and it was so sweet."

They grinned warmly at him, but he was reeling again.

"Then he absorbed all of the monster souls in the entire underground, and kinda became an even more ridiculously powerful god-like being. Since, you know, he had the equivalent of seven human souls, so waaaay more than the first version of him. Killed me again, but it was a strange place - hopes shielded me, dreams healed me, and my soul refused to die. More absolutely than usual. I didn't come back - I just wouldn't die. He bound me increasingly aggressively, but I just… didn't care. As long as I refused to give up…"

They shrugged.

"He said that every time I died, you guys forgot me a little more. Eventually, I would die alone and unloved. Which would suck. But also, fuck him, you know?"

Sans nodded in full agreement to that.

"Didn't matter if you all forgot me. If I forgot everyone. I wasn't going to fucking quit. Eventually I pushed him to use his power more, and he bound me hard. I couldn't fight, couldn't do anything, I couldn't reach my powers, my save file. I was helpless. But I realized, there was still one thing I was connected to… something else I could save."

Their smile turned softer.

"I could reach out to your souls inside of him," they said. "None of you remembered me, but you spoke… and revealed some of your deeper truths. From you, you said things like, 'just give up. I did.' And how you could never go back home, and everything was pointless."

They paused for a moment and Sans nodded. He tried not to ever say stuff like that out loud, but… well, it wasn't exactly unlike him.

"Long story short - I'm trying, not saying I'm doing a great job - I was able to reach through his soul, connect with all of you, get you to remember, and then was able to connect with his soul, too."

"flowey's?" Sans asked.

They hesitated.

"Sort of…" they said uncertainly, but then their expression firmed. "No. He'd started to regain himself. He was Asriel Dreemur again. I'll explain more, later. That's really a whole thing. But the point is, when I helped him remember himself, it all came back - his emotions, everything. Then he was great. With his help, everyone was restored, the barrier was broken, and things went great. Except for him - he had to give up his ability to love, to care, to feel, and go back to being Flowey again, with full knowledge of what he'd lost. But… but outside of that, Sans, it was wonderful. Toriel made a school, Papyrus got his car, you messed with him… everything was great."

They sighed.

"And I spoke to you, and to Alphys. About my concerns, about my worries. Alphys was sure there wasn't a problem and I should just be happy with what we had.

"You weren't sure. We talked at length about all sorts of things. And when I came up with… with that idea… you thought the idea of murdering everyone was really not a good one. You were really concerned that it would destroy me. You also didn't really like the idea of Chara messing with my mind, or everything resetting when I died of old age, either, so you were more torn."

So they had decided to talk to him and Alphys first. They had tried to do things the right way. He suppressed a sigh. He had a feeling he wasn't going to enjoy where this was going, even beyond what he already knew.

"You decided I should just give it time, see how I felt about things as time went on. You were so sure that trying to draw out Chara, whether or not it worked, would destroy me, that I'd lose myself. I really didn't think so. You said I was risking everyone, risking destroying everything, if I did it. I said, only if I went too far, only if I lost myself. And that I was also risking everyone, risking destroying everything, by refusing to find out more. You said that that was a reasonable conclusion, but if both paths risked destroying everything, then maybe not taking the one that might destroy me makes the most sense. That it's better to take the path with the least sacrifice and loss."

Sans was really in agreement with his other self, here. He couldn't ever imagine okaying an idea like that, even if he privately knew he would do the same if he felt he had no choice.

"We talked about odds, but you didn't tell me about your reports, about the nature of the timeline, even that you had an idea of what my power really was. You were really tight lipped about that sort of thing - about anything about your past, really. You said it was risky, but refused to clarify how or why, or how great the risk was. Or that you had an idea of what was at risk.

"And… I was afraid. Of the spirit in my mind, of what might happen. Of getting further from the time I fell into the underground, because that meant a larger chunk of time that'd be lost if I reset. I tried to give it time, but my fears and anxieties grew worse and worse.

"In the end, I told you what I'd decided. You didn't agree, but… you gave me a hug. You said you knew you couldn't stop me, that no one could, that you wanted me to choose otherwise, but that you believed in me. You told me not to go too far. Not to lose myself. Not to forget what mattered. Not to forget you. To stop as soon as I'd found out anything. You looked so resigned, so sad, so… lost. I felt like I'd betrayed you, but I swore to you that I'd fix everything. That it'd be okay, that it will have never happened."

Their face fell.

The other Sans had really tried to stop them. Violence wouldn't have helped. If reasons, and entreaties, and friendship weren't enough… he could see how he'd have felt hurt and lost enough to maybe not try as hard as he could. To just give up and accept the inevitable. Especially since their reasoning wasn't completely bunk - he'd have been uncertain what was best.

"You tried to wish me good luck, but your voice broke, and you looked like… almost like you were trying not to cry," they said, their voice tight. "I couldn't stand the look on your face, I couldn't handle it. I ran away. Not in body, but in spirit. I pushed and I found myself back where I fell. Or, I tried, rather."

They took a shaky breath.

"Flowey greeted me, in a void between times. He was resisting my attempt to reset, and so met me within the domain of the power - at least, that's what I think happened. He tried to ask me not to reset, too," they said hoarsely. "That he couldn't handle losing everything. I could have let things go back, could have returned to my last save point, right before that last conversation with you. Or, if I chose to reset… he asked me to erase his memories, too. He couldn't handle remembering regaining emotions, regaining love, and being the hero who broke the barrier, only to have it all torn away.

"I was… kind of emotionally overwhelmed, and I pushed, I just couldn't handle… and he was so sad, too, and I felt his power touch mine, and… that was it. It was absolute. I had gone back to the beginning."

They look down, looking ashamed, sniffling.

"I don't know why it didn't occur to me before," they said. "You didn't mention it, either. Maybe because it was obvious and I was just being an idiot. It didn't really… it just didn't occur to me that I'd erased our friendship. That it wasn't as simple as 'doing everything over' to get it back. That of course things would be different, that conversations would be different. It was there, as I lay in the flower bed that broke my fall, that I realized what I'd just destroyed. And that was the true beginning of my descent into madness."

That was obvious. He wouldn't have mentioned it, because of how obvious it was, and how sappy it was. That said, if he'd realized they somehow missed it, then he would have used that to try to talk them out of it.

But their reasoning wasn't wrong, either. He'd have been unsure, in the other timeline. Were they doomed to destruction either way? Was it safer for them to do things this way, in the end?

They sighed again.

"See, it's not like I was completely wrong," they said. "With people like Papyrus - it was a good, strong, real connection, but it was kinda… shallow? I'd only actually known you all for a few weeks, at that point. With Papyrus, if I just repeated my actions, even if I didn't get it exactly right, he'd feel the same way towards me, more or less. And it's not like I'd stop caring about him.

"In fact, I'd barely spoken to most people, and the conversations we'd had were… kinda to the point. But they were intense circumstances, which is why our friendships deepened so fast, so intensely. I believed, then and now, that I could get all of those relationships back without really losing anything. With just some time and effort, and maybe a short reset or two if I screwed something up.

"But as I sat there in the flowers, I realized that wasn't the case with you. I hadn't realized how observant you were, not yet, not completely. Regardless, I'd interacted with you more than anyone else, and our conversations actually had been deep. I suddenly realized that the version of you that I'd grown to care for so deeply was lost forever.

"And worse… that he had asked me not to go, not to erase him, and I'd blown him off."

They took a shaky breath.

Sans had to admit, that really sucked. For all parties.

"Why that occurred to me only when it was too late…" they said, and shook their head. "I'd been afraid, obsessive, and neither you nor Alphys had any suggestions on what to do about the source of that fear. I had an idea and had to do something, I felt like I had no choice. And if this was the only path that we could see, that had any chance of helping me learn… I'd been obsessed, I just couldn't think around that wall. It wasn't until I found myself in the new timeline, and I'd committed, that my thoughts could find themselves on another track. That I realized what I'd destroyed."

Well, on the bright side, he'd learned some important things. That the kid was… well, determined. He knew that already. But not just determined. They'd latch onto things, intent on carrying it through, or figuring it out, and would get obsessive. They'd even miss extremely obvious things, extremely relevant things, in pursuit of that obsession.

In a certain, critical way, the reason they'd reset was exactly the same reason why they'd left the Ruins. They had felt trapped and had an idea of how they could be free, and it didn't matter what lay past that point. Didn't matter how afraid they were, how dangerous it was, they felt they had no choice but to press on. First with Toriel in the Ruins, and then with the other Sans, after everyone had been freed. They clearly loved both, and had turned away hard from both, because they'd seen what looked like only a single real path forward.

And it sounded like the kid's feelings for Sans had been mutual. It hadn't been romantic, like it'd still just been a crush on their end, but their friendship was pretty intense. And for all he knew, it could have eventually become more. They were a lot younger than him, but that wasn't the worst thing. And with the resets, he had no idea how long that'd be true, anyway. Well, maybe it'd stay that way if they were careful with the resets like they said they'd be, and especially if he could be brought in on them. The fact that Flowey could remember the human's resets was promising.

"I… will be skipping a lot of the insanity of that timeline path, and will focus on my interactions with you," they said, swallowing. "As best as I can. Basically… hoo. I'd decided to kill everything, see if that worked. If it didn't, I'd reset and try something different. I'd do whatever it took to learn.

"But it seemed to be working. By the time I got to Toriel's house, it was Chara, and not me, that I saw in the mirror. As soon as I saw that, I committed to the path. I'd kill everyone, absolutely everyone, learn everything, and then fix it all."

The kid thought their "descent into madness" started with their realization at what they'd lost, but he figured that was more the tipping point. It really started with their obsession with figuring out about their little tagalong and their power.

"It was so hard…" they said softly. "I stopped crying with the monsters in the Ruins, as the shield of LOVE started to form around me, walling me off. But at first, I cried with every single one. And then, with Toriel… god, Sans, I…"

They trailed off and swallowed, not meeting his gaze.

"She died in a single strike, and I was so confused," they said in a forlorn voice. "But I think Chara resented her, and that bled through, since I was… so withdrawn. She condemned me as she fell, and I agreed with her, and numbly I continued. Flowey was so proud of me. He'd known Chara in life and immediately recognized them, instead of me. He liked the idea of me killing literally everyone in the underground, then traveling together on the surface, killing everyone there, too."

Well that wasn't good. The more he heard about this little flower, the less happy he was with the thing.

"Then… then the Snowdin forest, and you… and…" they trailed off. "God, Sans, seeing you again was… I'd started screaming a little, inside. You started off exactly the same as the first time, you tried to draw me into antics, but I just… I couldn't. I just stared at you, my face blank. It didn't take long before you started, er, poking me. Like, you said that your brother'd really like to see a human, so it'd be great if I kept pretending to be one."

Heh. That was a good one. He mentally high fived the other Sans. They gave him a shaky smile.

"It was hilarious, of course, and part of me started laughing. Another part was writhing on the floor in pain. Other parts were screaming. So the thing in control was… pretty much a blend of the shield of LOVE, Chara, my determination to follow through on my commitment. It was still me, at the time, I was still choosing my actions, but the disconnect to the world was really sharp. Like I'd said at the cliff, by the time we got to Snowdin, Papyrus described me as shambling around, and you called me out on being completely unable to emote at all."

He nodded at that.

"Seeing you like that, seeing the distrust…" they said, their face twisting in remembered pain. "Right before Snowdin, you spoke to me frankly. You said that I'd be running into Papyrus soon, and if I stayed on the path I'd been following, that I was gonna have a really bad time. And then, with a strange sort of sound, everything around me went black and you teleported away."

Mentally, he sighed. The other Sans had felt bound by the promise, unsure of what to do, and so did his usual of just going with the flow, of doing nothing. Not that he knew what the other Sans should have done. Breaking his promise wasn't something to do lightly.

And Papyrus… would have wanted to try. Sure, this version of Sans knew that Papyrus wouldn't stop the kid, but that version might have wondered. If anyone could get through to the anomaly, surely it'd be Papyrus. And stopping them directly wasn't the best outcome, since they could reset. They needed to choose to stop, and Papyrus would be better at that than him, he'd have figured.

Yeah, he could see why he let Papyrus face the kid, even as it twisted his gut.

"I collapsed to the ground," they said. "Inside, I was weeping, and screaming, and raging, but on the surface, from the outside, I was just sort of sitting placidly, blankly. I missed you. I missed us. Our friendship, our connection. I missed you looking at me with a gentle smile. I missed your jokes. I mean, you were still telling jokes, and they were funny as hell, even if they were a little sharp edged. Which, I mean, was totally deserved. You looking at me like that… with the threat in your eyes…"

They trailed off and took a breath.

"I settled myself and convinced myself of my path. I couldn't fix things with you without resetting. If I resetted right away, I'd have not only lost everything from the first timeline, but I wouldn't have learned all I could from this one. All that sacrifice would have been for nothing. I just had to follow through, kill everyone, observe everything, and then I'd go back and fix things, and I didn't care how many times it took, I'd do whatever it took for you to look at me with a gentle smile again, that it'd be fixed."

And he'd been smiling at them kindly a lot in this timeline. He couldn't help but give them another soft smile, and their eyes sparkled with a hint of joy. They were still struggling with these memories, obviously, but just a smile had eased their pain.

"So I went through Snowdin, which had been evacuated. I stole what I needed from the store. Dust blew by with the wind sometimes. The Monster Kid was there, because he was convinced the evacuation was stupid, and I thought about killing him, but I just… they're just a kid… I pulled back, they weren't in my way or anything. Chara seemed ambivalent about them, so I just passed them by. I did speak with them, confused, and it kinda pissed me off that they disregarded the evacuation orders."

They sighed.

For Sans' part, he was just glad they didn't kill the kid. So, apparently it wasn't quite "literally everyone." But…

"huh," he said. "i really got the impression that the kid had stood up to you, and that you'd killed them."

"I knew you were good, but how the hell did you figure that out?" they asked, after their face went through an impressive array of permutations.

"just the way you interacted with them," he said with a shrug.

They nodded and chuckled.

"You're right," they said. "But that was later. They got in my way, stood up to me, and I… I struck. But Undyne got there in time, taking the hit herself. She died in one hit… and then refused to die, transformed by her determination, and kicked my ass."

So the transformation was more literal than he'd originally thought. While, again, he didn't want anything bad to happen to anyone, he wished he could have seen that. Wished he could remember the reset… which, he supposed, was the same as usual.

"and then you did it over and over," Sans said, making them flinch.

"Yeah, I did," they admitted. "But I never ended up killing the kid. Never once."

"seems i have a habit of being a little bit wrong with you," Sans said lightly.

"No," they said seriously. "Well, okay, yes, but in this case… I struck at a child with a honed intent to kill, fully expecting and intending for them to die as a result. Morally, ethically - I am guilty of murdering them. The fact that Undyne happened to get in the way doesn't change my actions, doesn't absolve even the faintest measure of my guilt."

The hard look in their eyes gave him mixed feelings. They made no excuses and fully accepted what they'd done, which spoke well of their character. At the same time, they were bluntly and blatantly confessing to willfully murdering a child. Which, uh, was not what he would generally associate with a good character.

Still. With every word they said, every flicker of emotion that crossed their face - of which there were many of both - he was slowly building a picture of who they really were.

Normally, he'd not try this hard to analyze every little thing. It sounded like the Sans in the murder timeline had done so, as he would expect, but in the first timeline, he'd been more casual and relaxed. Sure, some observations, some judgment – he did take that seriously - but mostly apathetic hedonism.

He didn't want to strip their interactions in this timeline of anything real, to make it nothing more than calculated prods, analysis, and manipulation. He did want something real - feigning friendship just didn't work for him, and treating them like they were nothing but a tool was even worse. Plus, while he was absolutely getting the sense he could push them, that seemed liable to backfire horribly.

He did not want the already insane creature who could destroy all of time to lose their attachment to morality and things, and to him in particular - he did like the sense of control it gave him, that he had such personal influence on them. Selfish, maybe, but it was still reassuring.

And it did seem like they were positioned to understand him better than most. And with everything… well, he did feel like he could probably trust them. Maybe not trust them to be sane, but trust them to be in his corner. He wasn't certain, by any means, but they'd have to be one hell of an actor to fool him. They weren't just emoting, it was like they were trying to be naked before him.

As he thought, they continued.

"Going back a bit - Papyrus tried to stop me, and I already told you about how that went," they said, their voice tight. "I just kept repeating that I'd fix everything, that it'd be okay, that it was temporary. One thing… that I didn't mention… I heard Chara with him. They… they said that he was forgettable."

Their whole body clenched as they spoke. Sans twitched at that, too.

"I was so mad at them," they said, their teeth grinding. "I wanted them gone so badly. It sort of reaffirmed my course. I had to do something to make them go away. And this was the only path I could find that might do that. I'd kill Papyrus as part of my goal for figuring out and removing Chara, and then I'd restore Papyrus, and we'd be friends again and everything would be okay."

He nodded again. He was really able to get into their viewpoint, hearing their story like this. It's not what he would have done - he tended to default to doing nothing when he felt unsure. He'd have waited until the situation was critical to actually try to resolve it. Yeah, he'd have tried to do some experiments, some observations, but something major like this?

Even so, he found himself understanding. With as much as they'd died, with the depth of faith they'd gained in their own power, in their determination, with the depth of care they had for the others… it made sense. Combined with how dangerous they knew they were, and how an unknown like the ghost Chara could make for an extremely unstable situation. He did get why they felt like they absolutely had to do something.

Their increasing insanity from what they'd lost, from how much they'd suffered, and from what they'd done, plus having a psycho ghost in their head - that added, too.

"The warning you gave, right before Snowdin, that was the last I saw you until the Hall of Judgment," they said. "I'm quite sure you were watching me. Wrestling with your promise. Probably trying to see if you could see weaknesses to exploit, emotional and otherwise."

He agreed with that, but didn't visibly react. He simply watched their expression as they spoke, as it grew more and more hollow.

"By the time I got to you, I was a shell of a person. I'd developed my skill in combat to a hell of a degree. I'd killed so many. It was barely me you saw there. I was inside such a thick wall of LOVE that I feel like I couldn't have spoken to you if I'd tried. Not just failing to have my body reflect what I was feeling, with facial expressions or whatever, but like even an actual attempt to speak might fail. Chara wasn't in control, it was still me, but it was like… like only the actions where we both agreed, those were the only things that I could freely do. So, I mean, I did say a little sometimes, but it wasn't me, it was us."

Their eyes echoed with emptiness, surrounded with pain and guilt. They looked more stable than they had at the cliff, though.

"Seeing you, in that context, I…" they trailed off and swallowed. "I'd chosen my path, I'd committed. And you tried to talk me out of it. And it reminded me of how you'd tried to talk me out of going on this path in the first place. That last goodbye.

"And I stepped forward and you mocked me and were such a perfect asshole, in the best way, it was fantastic. Then, unlike literally everyone else, you attacked me first, without any real warning, and you wrecked me and I just laughed. It was so awesome, Sans. You were everything I'd thought you were. You were powerful beyond anyone else I'd ever seen. You were magnificent. And you killing me, killing the thing I was, was such a good and wonderful thing."

They smiled at that.

"You saw things on my face," they said. "Frustration was the first thing you'd called me out on, and I realized you were right. Chara was frustrated. Apparently, it wasn't just a wall, but a transference. Chara's emotions were now visible on my face. I didn't really… fully get the implications of that, I thought it was mostly just because I couldn't stand to be there, to be facing you."

Their smile turned sad.

"And I tried again, and it was hilarious. You probably killed me a dozen times with just that first attack, like, damn, Sans," they said with a grin. "But eventually, I managed to survive by the skin of my teeth."

Their smile fell.

"Attacking you… yeah, most everyone had started dying in a single strike, but deep down, I was just convinced that it wouldn't be that simple, that you were powerful and knowledgable, there was no way. If you had died… I probably would have lost myself, in hindsight. But in the moment, I was just convinced that it wouldn't actually be the end, nevermind that my intent to kill had been refined to a razor's edge. So I didn't stop myself from trying to strike you. And you teleported out of the way, and it was fantastic. And then you revealed things, you said things, and I couldn't… I couldn't turn away. I was mesmerized."

They sighed and rubbed at their face.

"You spoke of the timelines, the reports, and I admit, I felt a little sense of… not quite betrayal. But I was upset you were willing to tell the psycho version of myself about that, and not your friend. Yes, I know, it was part of an attempt to stop me. That maybe I'd take warnings of the end of the world seriously, in a way that I didn't take individual lives seriously. Still. I wish I'd known about that, but you were so tight lipped."

He shuffled a little awkwardly.

"You spoke a little of what you'd lost, that you'd given up trying to go 'back' a long time ago. That shook me, too, but again, with a little bit of frustration and anger, that you'd mention those things to the psycho, but not your friend. Again, yes, I know, it was meant as a targeted strike on my psyche. That maybe if there was a sense of connection between us, a sense of shared loss, that maybe that'd be enough to reach me, to make me stop."

He nodded at that. He did understand their frustration, honestly. But he was glad they realized it wasn't personal. It's not like he'd have been actually eager to connect with the psycho murderer.

"Still. You'd killed me several dozen times before I even managed to hear more than two comments in any given loop. The first time I heard you say those things, it kinda rubbed me the wrong way. The tenth time, I heard it in the spirit it was intended. I saw my friend honestly trying to reach out and find some way, any way, to make the madness stop."

He scratched at his head awkwardly.

"And then, I slowly pushed you to the point that you tried the gambit of sparing me. As I'd said at the cliff… you called on the friendship we'd once had. I have no idea if you actually managed to get a glimpse of it, in our interactions, or if it was a wild guess, just another in a list of gambits you were trying. But whatever the reasons you had, it struck true."

They closed their eyes.

"Everything I'd felt for you. The love that had started to grow. The realization of having lost that love, that connection. That last hug goodbye, the way your voice broke when you wished me luck. I barely existed as a sapient creature, in that moment. I was a raw thing of emotion. I went to you, my knife clattering to the ground. I didn't know what you'd do for sure, but I'd heard what you said, that it'd make your job easier. I was pretty sure you'd kill me and I just didn't care. I had to go to you, to lay myself on your mercy."

They smiled tenderly, lovingly.

"You hugged me. And killed me. And spoke to me as I bled out, painfully dying. It felt… real. Like maybe the stuff you'd said before had been a gambit, but mocking me as I died, and then saying if we were friends, I wouldn't come back? That felt like it was 100%, absolutely, certifiably Sans. No artifice, no mask, just the naked truth of how you felt. It felt exactly like here, in this restaurant, the first time, when your walls crumbled and you admitted you'd have killed me if it weren't for your promise."

They took a breath.

"That was the moment that I realized I'd fallen in love with you," they said, looking away.

He looked away, too. This was really intense stuff. It was easy to get swept up in the story, to feel for them. When they'd spoken at the cliff, he hadn't known them as well, it hadn't been this… coherent of a story. They were just bleeding all over him, at the time, and he'd been reeling.

This, though? This was hitting him. This was making sense, in a screwed up way.

"So then I found myself at my save point, in the Hall of Judgment, realizing everything. Knowing that I'd fallen in love with you, realizing that I'd started to fall for you at the restaurant here, that I'd already loved you by the time of that timeline's last farewell… and that I'd thrown it all away out of fear. Knowing that, even though you were trying to express whatever it took to get me to change my path, even kindness, that you hated me. Of course you hated me, how could you not? Hell, I hated me."

The look on their face as they spoke… he could be pretty numb sometimes, from his own acquired LOVE from darker times. But he found his heart hurting, hearing all this.

"I couldn't face it. I couldn't face what I'd done, what I'd been doing, what I'd lost, the look on your face. When you spared me, you'd smiled at me tenderly, kindly, and the hint of what I'd lost… it's a major part of why I'd cracked so hard. And I didn't know what to do, I'd ripped in half. Like I said at the cliff, the shield of LOVE had cracked and I was collapsed on the ground, screaming and writhing.

"But there was something in me that wasn't torn. There was something in me that had no doubts, no loss, no uncertainty. That wasn't weeping uncontrollably. Something that wanted to stand, that reminded me of what I'd chosen to do, that if I just stepped back, that I'd learn more and wouldn't have to do anything. I could just take it in and everything would be okay."

Yeah, he kinda agreed with them that getting rid of Chara was probably a really good idea.

"I agreed, like an absolute idiot. But I couldn't face any choices, none at all. Even resetting… the thought of facing everyone I'd killed, the thought of seeing you with that hope and cheer that you'd encouraged me with… I wasn't strong enough, I withdrew from everything. You tried to speak to me and I just screamed. I wanted to throw myself at you and cry on your shoulder, but the only version of you that I could do that with, I'd destroyed by resetting."

He nodded. He related to that a bit too much. Pulling back, disengaging, letting things happen around him because he couldn't face the pain of it all?

Yeah. He understood that.

"It was completely Chara that faced you, when we reloaded. Sure, I felt everything, but I no longer made the choices. And that's what I wanted. I just stepped back and stopped trying to hurt you, and instead just admired you. I watched you kill Chara, mocking them and tearing them down, again and again and again. I watched their frustration with you grow. You continued to try to call out to me, and it would still make me writhe and scream within my walls.

"But I wasn't… you weren't dying. We were just… dancing. I was learning about you and watching you be a badass, and you never even got hurt, and it was wonderful. I just soaked in my admiration for you. In my love for you. And just let myself feel it all, within the wall. Let it be unchained, let it grow freely.

"And you killed me so many times. I'd grown to appreciate battle ability, and you were just goddamned amazing, Sans, like holy shit. I felt a giddy surge of triumph every time I died, every time Chara seethed with frustration.

"But they got better at fighting. Memorized your attack patterns. Slowly, but surely, they pushed you harder and harder. You threw a final attack that wrecked us, it was amazing. And then, after at least a dozen deaths from that one attack alone, they finally got past it. And you used your 'special attack' of a goddamn pun, saying 'here goes nothing' and it being 'nothing' and I was just laughing. You'd bound us somehow, and we were bound into doing nothing, it was great. But we stood there, and Chara still was intent on seeing things through."

They sighed.

"And you spoke to me, trying to reach past the barrier, using whatever final emotional gambits you could think of to just make me stop. And then, you had nothing left to give. You stood and slowly succumbed to exhaustion and passed out. And Chara pushed with me and we raised the knife. And they pushed at me to make the decision, to attack. Because they couldn't quite do things against my will. But I felt their anticipation, their itching. I felt they were so close to being able to take control, rather than being given it.

"I remembered everything, as I looked at you, passed out before me. Papyrus… how I'd killed him, how it was okay because it'd have never happened, and wasn't the same thing true here? If I refused to kill you, didn't that mean that on some level the deaths did matter, so what I'd done with Papyrus was actually unforgivable? That if I loved you enough to not kill you, that it meant that Papyrus didn't really matter enough to not kill?"

Sans winced at that.

"But in the end, it didn't matter," they said. "Chara's justifications. My commitment. My determination to see the path through. The struggle between the values of lives. The implications of my struggle to kill you, but acceptance of killing the others.

"In the end, it all washed away in a few simple truths. The fact was, I loved you and that mattered to me more than anything else. Even if you didn't remember me, and I could never regain the connection we had. I might build something new, but I could never really get it back. Everything else was muted, anyway, by the shield of LOVE. Despite Chara's frustration with me, I surrendered to that love, to the promise I'd made to you, that I'd fix everything. Didn't matter if I ultimately died in the end. Didn't matter how much I'd lost. Didn't matter if you wanted to rip me to pieces on finding out what I'd done, to torture me into madness and shred my soul. Didn't matter if you hated me forever.

"All that I'd been, the entirety of my soul, it burned away, leaving only a single thread of purpose, of existence. My entire self, reforged around a singular concept.

"All that mattered was that I loved you, that I was yours, and all that went with that - such as my promise to fix everything. A single note of stability, within the madness I'd become. It was hard to speak, hard to reset - Chara resisted with everything they had - but I did it… and the shield didn't come with, nor Chara's presence. I felt everything."

They were silent at that.

"and that was this morning," Sans said after a moment.

"And that was this morning," they agreed with a dry laugh.

He'd probably need to get a psychology degree just to categorize the amount of trauma this kid had gone through… and it wasn't some distant thing. To him, they were describing events that had never happened. Just a story. Like a fanfic about people in real life.

To the kid? Within the last twenty four hours - depending on how one counted them, anyway - they realized they'd fallen in love, that they'd killed the person they loved in a truly permanent way, experienced pain and death on a scale that was utterly insane, went through the experience of killing everyone that mattered to them, and were desperately trying to cling to any hope of making things right.

And they were confessing everything - their sins, their feelings, everything - to the echo of the guy they'd fallen in love with. That they knew couldn't possibly return even a fraction of their feelings.

It was like they'd said, about when the other Sans had spared them - that they felt had no choice, that they had to go and lay themself on his mercy.

And he had to figure out what to do about this.

They shook their head as if clearing their thoughts.

"Look, I know this has got to be awkward for you," they said. "But you don't owe me anything. It's the opposite… I owe you everything. I won't make any demands on you. You can accept my friendship, or reject it. You can feel whatever you want for me - love, hate, care, annoyance, frustration - and I'll accept it all. I destroyed the friendship we'd grown naturally, in my short-sighted idiocy, and that's a loss I just have to deal with."

As he'd speculated, and as part of their confession, openly revealed. Just throwing themself at his mercy, in every way.

"I don't know how I'll feel once everything is fixed, once that promise is fulfilled. Right now, it feels like it's the only thing that's driving me to keep living, beyond the simple fear of death. That, and the hope that you'll want me to live. But this timeline… it's been healing. Seeing Papyrus so happy… I can't tell you how wonderful it was. Maybe I'll start to actually be okay, by the time everything is fixed."

"But one thing that is certain… you have my absolute loyalty," they said, a burning intensity to their voice, and determination in their eyes. "I don't see that changing. Ever. As I'd said at the cliff… my life, my death, my service, anything. You saved me from myself, from losing who I am, from Chara taking true and absolute control. I will never stop being grateful for that."

He looked away, thoughts overwhelming him.

Every step in this process had made sense. Not everything was what he'd have done, of course, but it all had made sense. In a sometimes deranged sort of way. He felt for them, empathized with them, for every step of the journey.

And that tender smile he'd seen in this timeline? He understood it now. Really understood it. It wasn't mere appreciation for the monsters they encountered, like he'd first assumed. He was watching them heal. That's why it had looked so profound, so impossibly tender and loving. He was watching their appreciation, not of the individuals, but of the piece-by-piece restoration of everything they had lost.

"this really isn't healthy," he said after a moment. "you know that, right?"

They laughed.

"Nothing in my mind is healthy," they said, their tone a little bitter. "And it hasn't been for a while. It's one of the reasons my trust in you is absolute - I've decided you are more trustworthy than I am, and so I lay my fate entirely in your hands. I am determined to see things through, still determined to live, because that's just… who I am."

They hesitated a moment, uncertainty flashing in their eyes.

"Telling you all this… was supposed to be a precursor to you telling me what you were feeling, too," they said tentatively. "But, um, you don't have to."

Their nervousness and uncertainty was clear on their face. It was a small thing, but also kind of a make-or-break moment, for their friendship. It'd determine his intentions in their eyes. Whether he intended to be fair with them, or to use them as a tool.

"yeah, i do," he said casually, then added with a wink. "i tell the best jokes, i give murderous time travellers a bad time, and i keep my word."

"Damn right, you do," they said, grinning broadly at him. Then their face fell. "Sorry about making you break your promise."

"well, as you said, it never happened, right?" he asked.

"Right," they agreed.

He paused for another moment, gathering his thoughts.

He was pretty damn confident that there was nothing he could do or say that would actually push them too far, that would drive them away. He could decide to do… all sorts of awful things that flashed through his too-active imagination… and they'd take it with a smile. And would probably thank him for the opportunity to do him a service.

Awkward.

But it had other implications, too. The main reason that honesty was hard in relationships - friendships or otherwise - was because unpleasant or dark truths could be damaging to relationships. Well, one of the main reasons, anyway.

He didn't have to worry about that in this case. Their devotion to him… that look in their eyes, it was downright fanatical. Not healthy, sure, but it seemed trustworthy. He could twist the knife, emotionally torment them, and they'd stay fervently devoted.

On a purely pragmatic, practical level, they were too useful, too important to discard. But he didn't want them to just become a tool. He had decided to try for friendship, and that was going to be… well, not like any other friendship he'd ever made, that was for sure.

But it seemed like the only path for anything real was something based on honesty. He didn't tend to show his cards to anyone. Not Papyrus, no one. But…

He studied the zealous fervor in their eyes. Unflinching acceptance of whatever he'd decide. Okay, he was sure he could make them flinch, but that aside.

Should he do his usual and play around, revealing a little through jokes, or just say fuck it and lay it all out? The first was way more comfortable for him, but… he sighed. The second seemed like it was the only way to have any hope of building anything real. This couldn't grow in the usual way. Pragmatic, manipulative reasoning in hopes for a result that could become real - seemed like the best he could do.

Naked truth it was.

"so, like you, i'm going to try to be honest, even if it's awkward," he said, and they nodded. "fact is, this whole situation is messed up, complicated, and confusing. you explained things fine, but it's confusing how i should feel about it, and about you. i don't love you, but i do like you. you're fun, you're a great audience, even if you've already heard the joke. you're patient and you care about monsters a hell of a lot. and about your friends."

They nodded, still looking uncertain.

"at the same time, you're dangerous as hell, and i don't mean that in the sense of worrying you're going to snap and start murdering people," he said. "really don't think you will. you don't seem to take the resets seriously. like you don't get that you're erasing timelines and making versions of people cease to exist."

They flinched hard at that.

"I get it better, now," they murmured.

"which is good," he said. "still. on a gut level, it's a problem, y'know?"

They nodded. He hesitated, and decided to just go for it.

"fact is, and maybe this is harsh, but… i think about that other sans. you cared about him. he cared about you. he asked you not to erase him. you did it anyway," he said.

He was pretty sure he'd have gotten less of a reaction from them if he'd actually pulled out a gaster blaster and shredded them to bloody scraps. Assuming they lived long enough to react, that is.

His face was blank and dispassionate as they gripped the table, tears streaming down their face, their entire body shaking. They looked like they were collapsing in on themself, but physically weren't capable of collapsing enough. Their breaths were broken, like they weren't even able to sob.

He locked down their local bubble of space in time, so they'd have time to recover before getting anyone's attention.

"i bet you'd hurt less if i'd killed you instead," he said lightly, trying to liven things up.

"God, Sans, so much less," they said with a broken laugh. "I want you to kill me so much right now… the pain of your attacks is… distracting. And weirdly relieving. It hurts so much less to die, than… than to realize I betrayed you… Sans… I'm so… I'm so sorry…"

His mental checklist of predictions was looking very green. He'd intentionally phrased things to hurt, and their devotion didn't flicker. If anything, it looked stronger.

"i get it," he said, a little gruffly. "but as i said, i don't hate you. and it's complicated. you can see that, right? why it's kinda messy on this end?"

"Yeah, I can," they said, looking down and wiping at their face.

They'd regained their composure enough that he let the timefreeze lapse.

"there's a part of me that's worried something like that is going to happen to me, too," he admitted with a sigh. "that i'll put in all this work into trying to make this timeline work out, and it won't mean anything. it'll all be erased."

"I won't do that this time," they said seriously.

"all it'd take is for something to get in your craw, make you change your mind," he said.

He knew he was pushing, and that maybe he was being unfair, but it was really eating at him. But he also felt that it didn't matter, because he couldn't push them too hard. And if he was wrong about that, he was pretty sure he'd see it if they were getting close to their limit.

"what about the next thing that you feel like you 'have' to do, that everything hangs in the balance unless you reset? you know what they say - if all you have is a hammer, everything starts to look like a nail. if your special power is the ability to reset time, then that's what you're gonna want to do."

They looked away and thought for a moment.

"It's not as good as saying it'll never happen, but…" they said, and looked at him again. "We did try a little, in that first timeline, to see if I could bring anyone else along. We didn't try much, though. You wanted me to mostly just not use the power at all, Alphys wanted to just spend time with Undyne, and I wasn't really feeling the need to use it, either.

"And then, when I had the horrible idea… you'd mentioned maybe trying harder to get you to remember, and I hate this, I really… but I didn't want you to see what I'd do, you know? I didn't… I didn't think about the implications, that I was really erasing you. I just wanted the version of you that was my friend to not have to see what I was thinking of doing. I had this stupid image in my head that I'd reset, do horrible things, learn stuff, fix everything, and then we'd be back together and it'd all be good, and you wouldn't have to be burdened with what I'd done. Because I was a fucking idiot, but that's what was going on in my head."

He nodded at that. And that Sans had been too hurt by it all, by the perceived betrayal, to really lay it out. Because the kid was insightful, so that Sans would have had reason to believe they did get it, and were trying to follow this path anyway.

"But I didn't see it, Sans, honestly I didn't," they said and he nodded again. "Let's make it a priority this time, okay? Even if we don't think I will need the power, even if we hope nothing ever comes up that'll be an issue… let's get that problem out of the way right from the start. Let's do what it takes - you, me, Alphys, whoever else you think will help - and let's try to do whatever it takes to get you to remember the resets. We know Flowey can remember my resets, and so I'll ask him, when he's less insane, after fixing everything. See if he has any insights."

Maybe a little dangerous that this person was saying "do whatever it takes," but sadly, it was reassuring. Most people didn't really mean those words. This kid, though? He couldn't help but feel a surge of honest to goodness, real optimism.

It'd been a while.

"that's… probably a good idea," he said. "it is kinda selfish to feel like it helps, just for me to be able to remember, but it is what it is."

They smiled at him.

"Trust me, I get that, Sans," they said. "There's a big difference between being on the outside and on the inside of this loop."

"do you think it's even possible, though?" he asked. "i don't know the full story with flowey, but it sounds like his circumstances were… unique."

They were quiet for a moment.

"Small resets… do those bother you?" they asked, and he gave them a curious look, so they elaborated. "Like, if I save right next to you, and we have a giant list of things to try, and I just reload after every failed attempt. So rather than you tediously going through the whole list, I just tell you what number to try. Would that bother you?"

"no," he said after a moment. "that'd feel like skipping work, not losing myself."

They grinned at that.

"Then if it's possible at all, I'm sure we can do it," they said. "Doesn't matter how expensive the trials are, or how much work it takes. I can just tell you ahead of time exactly the point at which I'll save, and you can just help as needed, and otherwise screw around for fun. And you'll only end up experiencing the version where things actually worked."

"might not be very 'small' resets, if you're talking about buying and building expensive equipment," he pointed out.

"We can play it by ear, whatever you're comfortable with," they said. "The point is, we do know it's possible for an entity other than myself to remember my resets, and vice versa. When Flowey got the souls and gained control over the power, I remembered his resets, too. Determination may be important, but we've got Alphys's DT extractor and an ability to undo things if they go wrong."

It wasn't actually Alphys' extractor… but that was beside the point. The idea of doing determination experiments on him was a little uncomfortable, but they were right that it didn't have the risk of real consequences.

"One way or another… if it's possible at all, we can do it. And we can try to play it so that we're not putting undue pressure on you or Alphys. I am kinda insane and insanely committed to following things through, so I'm not worried about me giving up, no matter how long I spend. I don't care if I spend years over the course of what you perceive as weeks, I won't give up."

The look in their eyes… yeah, he agreed with that.

"tell me, kid," he said after another moment. "i get the feeling i already know, but, promises. you take them seriously?"

"Absolutely and unquestionably," they said, their eyes blazing. "What promise do you want from me?"

"i figured, this whole thing between you and me, it all started with a promise," he said with a shrug. "maybe we can end this with one, too."

They nodded, and the look they gave him was so intense it was almost frightening.

"promise me that you won't do it again," he said. "that you won't just erase our timeline without seriously thinking things through. that you won't go on another murder spree. that you will…"

He hesitated a moment, thinking of wording. It was a bit self-centered, but it was how he felt, damn it.

"... that you will try your best not to leave me behind," he finished.

They reached out and took his hand, squeezing it tightly.

"I swear to you," they said, their voice blazing as sharply as their eyes. "I swear it, Sans, on all that you have done for me, on my soul, on every scrap of love in my heart for all of those that have stolen my heart. I will never treat full resets as anything less than the destruction of the world as it exists. Reloads are far lesser than that, and those we'll play by ear, but I will always think about you and try to involve you in their use. I will never, ever, under any circumstances, go on a murder spree, or even kill anyone at all, especially if there's any chance of it sticking, unless you personally decide it's necessary. And I will strive to do whatever it takes, no matter how long, no matter how hard, to… to never leave you behind. To take you with me."

It was kinda ridiculous how much better that made him feel.

He sometimes got a little awkward at sappy things, and the way that promise felt, well…

"uh, that's good," he said awkwardly. "well, uh, yeah. so. we have a plan. and, uh. i guess asgore's waiting, huh?"

"Yeah, he is," they said with a smirk. "Will I see you in the Hall of Judgment?"

Y'know, that's just what the corridor was named now. That was fine.

"pretty sure i don't need to judge you, unless you end up breaking your promise in the next few minutes, which would surprise me," he said with a chuckle.

"Ha, ha," they said dryly. "But maybe you should. It'd be a good… little goodbye. Flowey will kill me once he gets the human souls. It's only a few minutes after that point, but there's going to be a lot of reloads in that gap."

"makes sense," he said, and felt another twinge of nervousness.

Hopefully it all went the way the kid expected. They'd only ever done it the once, and it seemed risky as hell to let the murder-flower get the souls, but it sounded like it was a necessary step.

He started to head off.

"i'll be watching," he said. "good luck, kid."

They trembled a little at his words and nodded. He went off to the side and teleported back to his room.

He really needed a moment.