Hi there, true believers. I'm back! And I am here to deliver the spin-off fan-fic of a beloved crossover fan-fic that will give you more of some of you either already love or will come to love after reading this. This side-story is dedicated to explaining how Hideyoshi Nagachika became this universe's version of Marvel's Merc with a Mouth. To both new readers and returning ones, I welcome you to...
DEADPOOL: GAIDEN
Hide stood with a massive grin on his face as Kaneki and Hisako looked on with a look of shock on their faces. While Yukio, Shuu, Karren, Matsumae and Milo stood in confusion as to what was going on as Matsumae asked Shuu,
"Master, do you know who he is?"
"He's a friend of both Kaneki and Nishio...but from what I heard, he went missing for quite some time. Can't imagine what Kaneki is feeling right now..."
"I see..."
Kaneki simply says,
"Hide..."
He then became speechless at seeing not just Hide alive but looking like a burn victim. Except the burns look like lesions at the same time. Hide notices this and tells Kaneki,
"I get it. I look like Ryan Reynolds fused with a shar-pei."
Hisako contained her laugh, much to everyone's disapproval.
"Worse than that...You look like if the Hulk ripped off his scrotum on a drunken dare and the scrotum came to life on its own."
Replied Kaneki. Everyone stood stunned at what Kaneki just said as only the wind could be heard. The silence was broken when Hide slowly laughed out loud.
"Holy shit! That's the nastiest shit that's ever come out of your mouth."
"I haven't even started yet! You look like the baby of an avocado that had hate sex with an older avocado."
Hide laughed at what Kaneki just said and kept doing so by what was said next.
"For real man! You look like Freddy Kruger phased-fucked the topographical map of Utah!"
"I know man! I look like a testicle with teeth!"
Both laughed hard as they acted (almost) the way they used to be. While everyone did not know how to react to how the two acted, Kaneki calmed down and asked his friend,
"Seriously Hide...where have you been? I mean, I know I was under mind control by my bastard of a great-grandfather. But even when I was Haise, I managed to discover that I was friends with you at one point, but..."
"A lot of them said I went missing..."
"Yeah..."
Hide got a serious look on his face as he got a little emotional when he told Kaneki,
"Call it grief. I mean, dude...you died."
Kaneki remembered when he sacrifice himself to save the world. However, he admitted to himself that he underestimated how much his sacrifice would affect those closest to him. Of all people, Kaneki vastly underestimated how much Hide would miss him.
"I'm sorry."
"Well you fucking should be! All this time, I had to come between you and suicidal tendencies! AND YOU FINALLY DO IT IN A WAY THAT MAKES ME LOOK LIKE AN UNGRATEFUL DICK!"
"I didn't mean to!"
"WELL YOU DID...and I did feel angry...but really I felt depressed that you weren't around...and I went about it the wrong way..."
"Like...Deadpool before X-Force?"
"Yeah...and how I became Deadpool is a bit of a long story..."
xxxxxx
(Vancouver, three and a half years ago)
In an apartment building, two individuals were arguing with each other. One was a pizza delivery person, either in or approaching his 20s. The other was the male tenant of the apartment the pizza delivery person stood in.
"Would it help if I slowed it down for you? I. did not. Order. The. Pizza."
"Look man, I got a call to deliver a pineapple and olive pizza to 7348 Red Lodge Drive, apartment room 316, to a Mr. Merchant."
"Yeah, the Mr. Merchant who didn't order the fucking pie!"
"Well, unless you got a roommate, who placed the call?"
"I did."
Hide stepped out of the bathroom of the apartment, with both individuals looking at him with confused looks. Hide wore a red sweat jacket, a white tank top with blue lining, navy jeans, and black sneakers. He asked the pizza guy,
"You said pineapple and olive?"
The pizza guy nodded yes, to which Hide received the box.
"Sweet and Salty."
Merchant asked,
"The fuck are you? And the fuck you doing in my-"
Hide brought out a Desert Eagle pistol with his right hand and pointed at Merchant. Hide then handed the pizza box to the pizza guy and took out a pizza slice with his left hand before savoring the taste.
"Crust is just right..."
Hide continued to savor the taste, until he got interrupted by Merchant.
"Hey, man. I hate to get in the way..."
Hide then looked at Merchant with disdain and irritation while still holding the pistol in his right hand.
"L-Look, if it's about that poker game, I told Howie I was good for it."
Hide continued to point his pistol at Merchant, to which the tenant of the apartment then took out his wallet and gave it to Hide.
"Okay, look. Just-Just take my wallet."
"Thanks. One moment."
Hide finished the pizza slice before taking Merchant's wallet. The pizza guy then asked Hide,
"Sir, before you do anything to him...do you mind if I get a big tip?"
Hide gave a light chuckle before asking,
"Jerry, right? Jerry Markels?"
"Y-Yeah?"
"My name...is Hideyoshi Nagachika. But you can call me either Hide...or Yoshi. Everybody loves Yoshi, right?"
Hide did a little impersonation of Yoshi, the dinosaur companion of Mario with his tongue. Both men in the apartment gave fake laughs to this.
"As you can guess, despite being Asian, my english is good enough for guys like you."
Both men in the apartment agreed with Hide on this point.
"Now comes the bad news...Jerry. No go on the tip. Because...I'm not here for him."
Hide then brought out a card that Jerry looked familiar with before pointing his pistol at Jerry instead of Merchant. Merchant then laughed in relief before saying,
"Whoo! Dodged a big-ass bullet..."
Hide pointed his pistol at Merchant again.
"Not out of the woods yet!"
Merchant stood nervous as wondered what problem Hide had with him.
"Just ease up on the bedazzling. They're jeans, not a chandelier."
Hide then threw the wallet Merchant gave him earlier to the floor.
"Here's your wallet back, by the way..."
"T-Thanks..."
Hide then shifted his attention back to Jerry.
"Now. Jerry. Answer me this question. Do you know an Alissa Wilmoth? Did I pronounce that right? Wilmoth?"
Jerry nodded yes. Hide took out another slice and ate three bites before continuing.
"Because she knows you...and she does not like how you've been creeping on her lately."
Merchant gave a disapproving nod to Jerry while mouthing the word "dude".
"You see Jerry...I belong to a group of guys who, for the right price, will beat a motherfucker down for anyone who hires us. And Alissa...she saved up enough of her allowance..."
Hide finished the pizza slice he held before finishing.
"To hire me...to...talk to you."
"Y-Y-You want to talk to me?"
"Well, it's more of a message. Which is how...affordable I was willing to be to her."
Jerry stammered a little before barely getting out,
"But I'm just-"
"A stalker. Threats hurts, Jerry. And you had no idea just how much she wanted to hurt you back. I had to talk her down from hunting your ass with a sledgehammer and reenact that scene from Misery with you."
"W-What's Misery?"
"SERIOUSLY MAN?!"
Jerry felt scared when Hide exclaimed to Merchant,
"This motherfucker right here has never seen Misery!"
"You've never seen Misery, man?! The fuck is wrong with you?!"
"I don't see old movies!"
"MY POINT IS..."
Hide cocked the hammer of his pistol to further scare Jerry.
"Keep away from Alissa. Cool?"
"Y-Yes sir."
"We done then."
"What? Really?"
"Yeah."
Hide placed his pistol in his left pant pocket before getting into a friendly mood, asking Merchant,
"Dude, did you see the look on this guy's face?"
"I didn't know what to do. I was so scared."
"I get it. I totally get it."
All three of them started to laugh, only for Hide to commit tonal whiplash by forcing Jerry against a nearby wall and getting in his face in the process. Hide was in a vicious mood when he told Jerry,
"You ever look in her general direction again..."
Hide placed the barrel of his pistol on the right side of Jerry head.
"Pop, pop. Bitch. Now stay right where you are..."
Jerry stood where Hide forced him earlier as Hide brought out his smartphone.
xxxxxx
At a local skate park, three high school girls were enjoying themselves before Hide arrived while sporting a pair of sunglasses. He talks to one of them,
"Alissa?"
"Yeah?"
Hide brought out his smartphone and showed a selfie of him with Jerry, her stalker. Hide made a kissy face while he still had his gun on Jerry head. Jerry looked horrified within said selfie. Alissa got up, looking both relieved and ecstatic by the selfie.
"No friggin way..."
"You won't see this guy again, but he said he's sorry."
"Can you send it to me?"
Hide tapped his phone a couple of times before Alissa's phone dinged.
"Done."
Hide looked around before saying,
"Knew I should've brought my roller-blades. Show how it's done, you know..."
Alissa hugged Hide for what he did for her.
"And that's why we do it. Mostly the money, though."
One of Alissa's friends asked Hide,
"Think you can fuck up my step-dad?"
"Only when he's earned it. Later."
As Hide was leaving, Alissa says to him,
"Wait."
He stopped for a moment to listen to her.
"You're my hero."
Hide gave a big grin and gave double peace signs before leaving.
Despite what she said, back in those days, I was anything but a hero. I was a newcomer to the underground mercenary scene. One of many bad guys to fuck up worse guys. Even though I was new, the skills my old man taught me helped me make a name for myself. Of course, this was Vancouver, which was in Canada. South Vancouver, to be exact. So, hardest killer in Canada? Easy to do.
Hide arrived at a bar in an alley. On the side of the entrance was a sign that read "Sister Margaret's School for Wayward Girls."
Yeah. That's what it says. The place was like a job fair for mercenaries. The gold card I sported earlier is how we get our jobs for the day. Like Jerry. And again, because I was new, that was how I got the job.
Hide made his way to the bar, where he meets with the bartender, Jack Hammer. He was often called Weasel, but since Hide was new, he had no choice but to call him by his last name.
"Mr. Hammer."
"Yoshi. Got her done?"
"Yo."
Hide brought out his smartphone to display the selfie.
"Nice job. Hope the money was worth it."
"Dude was just desperate. I knew guys like him who were way worse back in Japan."
"How worse?"
"Two words: Idol Fans. Overweight, zero social skills, and too much time and lotion on their hands."
"Sounds seriously nasty. Well, for a job well done, what's your poison?"
"How about a blow job?"
"Oh god, me too."
"The drink, dude. First, payout."
"Coming right up."
Weasel gave Hide both his payout for the job and then his drink, which came in a shot glass.
"Alright. Kahlua, Bailey's and..."
Weasel added the finishing touches to the drink by bringing out a whipped cream canister..
"whipped cream. Voila, a...Blow Job. Don't tell me-"
Before Weasel can finish, Hide sees one of the waitresses of the bar pass by him.
"Kelly, hold up."
Kelly stops at Hide's request.
"Give this to Buck. Tell him it's from Boothe. Little foreplay."
"If anyone breaks anything, you're paying for it."
"Roger dodger."
One of the patrons of the bar called Buck, who was tall and portly white man with a long white beard wearing biker clothes angrily approached another of the bar patrons, Boothe. Boothe was of the same height as Buck but was black instead of white, while wearing clothes similar to a bar bouncer. He had drinks with his friends until Buck arrived with the Blow Job drink delivered to him.
"Boothe!"
Buck slammed the shot glass on the table in front of Boothe to intimidate him. Boothe, however, was anything but as he asked,
"What you want?"
Buck punched in Boothe's nose, which started a bar brawl. During the fight, Weasel asked Hide,
"Why do you do this, man?"
"I don't take the shits, Mr. Hammer. I just disturb them."
One of the bar patrons lifted a stool to which Weasel exclaimed,
"That's a new stool!"
The stool became broken when it slammed against someone's back. Hide says to this,
"I've checked. It was 15 dollars."
"Well, I'm doubling it for this shit you've started."
The bar brawl came to an end when Buck slammed Boothe to the ground and punched him in the face. Said punch made Boothe unresponsive, which prompted Weasel to yell,
"BOOTHE'S DOWN! BOOTHE'S DOWN!"
Weasel eased Buck out of the way to confirm if Booth died.
"Easy, Buck."
Weasel held a small mirror to Boothe's nose. The fact that the mirror fogged up was the signal that he lived through Buck's beatdown.
"He's alive. No one wins today."
The bar patrons groaned at this.
Little fun fact: this bar runs a certain kind of betting pool. It's how I got my name. But I'm getting ahead of myself...
"Nice try, Yoshi."
"Got me. I picked Boothe. Who'd you got for the dead pool?"
"Well..."
"Dude, no..."
Hide looked up at the chalkboard. On it was written "Sister Margaret's Dead Pool," a collection of bets on which one of the bar's regular patrons and registered mercenaries would die when a bar brawl would happen. Hide sees his abbreviated name "Yoshi" on it two times. One for the bet he made for Boothe in the amount of 150 dollars, and the other for his death in the amount of 200. Made by Weasel.
"Seriously, man?!"
"I wanted the money."
"You still think I'm gonna wipe out?"
"You've only been here four months. It's honestly amazing at this point."
"Keep being amazed. I ain't going out like a bitch."
"Heard that before..."
"I mean it, man. I'm on a mission."
"Heard that, too."
Hide only sighed in response to how little faith Weasel had for him. Not wanting to feel like a total jerk, Weasel gave Hide a bottle of beer.
"Domestic only. You pay for the rest."
Hide brought out a couple of 20 dollar bills to pay for three more beer bottles.
"Gonna need to see one more for the stool."
Rolling his eyes, Hide gave Weasel another 20 to pay for the broken stool. Weasel then gave Hide his beer bottles.
"By the way..."
"Still haven't heard anything, man."
"Still?"
"What can I say? If I have something, I'll tell you. But if I got jackshit, I got jackshit."
Hide sighed one last time before replying,
"Fair enough."
As Hide drank his beer, he remembered the funeral the X-Men held for his best friend.
Yeah...I traveled out of Japan for...soul searching. Which led me to here...Second, when I still worked at the GCB office in the 1st ward, I managed to find out that Kanou still had some associates here in Canada. I was working on a hunch that some parts of the Weapon X program were still active. So far, I had nothing.
Hide stayed in a sparse and rundown apartment in the same area as Sister Margaret's. Although he was frugal, the payouts were not enough for him to afford nice furniture. All he could afford was a decent enough bedframe and a used mattress. Really, what he spent his money on were weapons that he could legally acquire in Canada, and what he could afford on the black market. But what ate away his bank account most of all were Q-Bullets.
Sometimes, I get lucky and see a guy about some Q materials. Which really helped me in the long run because things with Aogiri back home got bad. Bad enough for it to reach where I was living right now.
(Two months later)
As Hide entered the bar after today's request, Weasel sounded happy to see him.
"Yoshi!"
"Got another one."
"Another ghoul bites the dust. How many does that make now?"
"14 in one month so far."
"Damn."
"I blame Aogiri."
"Yeah man. I heard these Aogiri pricks from Japan are expanding now."
"Jesus, if I wanted to be reminded of home, I'd watch Princess Zelda fucking Fox McCloud."
"Now that's a power couple. By the way, thanks for connecting me with that Q-material guy. We're getting a lot more jobs due to the GCB ignoring the smaller ghouls in the area."
"Especially since we lost a quarter of our usual guys. Since that day..."
"Don't remind me, man."
I'll elaborate. One day, three guys none of us knew before got inside the bar. At first, no one thought of anything with them. Until one of them took a bite out of Kelly. Once we found out they were ghouls, it was a slaughter at first. But things started to turn around when I brought out my Q-Metal based weapons. I shared some of the Q-bullets I had on me, and I had a Bowie Knife made of Q-Metal on me. We lost about 13 of our usual guys. Sure, there were a lot of winners on the dead pool (me included), but it was still regarded as a shitty thing to do. Once we saw on TV that there was an Aogiri offshoot here in Vancouver, the GCB office attention was on them full-time, leaving the small-time predators going to town. That's when Sister Margaret's got a bit more attention. But that mean the bar got a little quiet...
Hide asked Weasel,
"How many left?"
"Same as last week. 23…"
"Shit, man…"
"I know. Flesh-fuckers really whittled us down…On the bright side, we got three new guys."
"Let me guess: they gonna wipe out in a week?"
"Hey man. I just call them like I see them. Payout."
Hide received 300 dollars for taking down a pair of ghouls. Just after he received his payout, he sees Buck arriving with a bloody scar on the top of his head.
"How you holding up, Buck?"
"Better than the flesh-fucker."
Both Hide and Weasel laughed before Buck asked,
"Can I get a couple of beers?"
"Sure thing, man. Coming up."
After Buck received his beers, Weasel tells Hide,
"By the way..."
Weasel reached for his shirt pocket to give to Hide a black card.
"Finaly got something for you."
"For real?"
"For fucking real."
Weasel pointed to one of the tables at the back of the bar, where a normal-looking male in a regular suit sat. He only had a glass of water on the table in front of him.
"Guy over there came in looking for you. Real grim reaper type. You've been warned."
Hide looked at the card for a little while before heading to where the mysterious individual sat at.
"Mr. Nagachika."
"How can I help you? Aside from finally killing Bill and Ted?"
"I work for an organization that scouts for...people like you."
"How? You need to fill a sucker quota or something?"
"It's my job. Recruitment. Recently, my organization has given me permission to switch to a new type of clientele. And sir...you honestly fit the bill."
"If that word ends with Cosby, tell him I'm charging a million dollars an hour."
The individual chuckled a little before continuing.
"Mr. Nagachika...I've read up on you. Honestly, your recent assignments you've received here make a whole lot of sense."
"Where are you going with this?"
"Hideyoshi Nagachika. Born January 2002. Lost your birth parents at the age of five. My condolences. Was adopted by Sai Miyazaki, 2nd class Investigator of the Japanese branch of the GCB, 12th ward. He taught you how to defend yourself against both humans...and ghouls. Lost his life to one by the time you graduated from high school. Attended Kami University...until recently."
"Oh wow. You know my history."
Replied Hide in a sarcastic one. The individual brushed it off to finish with,
"Why I wanted to find you is because of this...fact that...caught my eye."
At first, I really wanted to fuck him up...but that meant losing my only lead.
"Mr. Nagachika, I am aware that Ken Kaneki was your best friend growing up...and that losing him...was a terrible loss. Now...I'm not shaming you or anything. Rather I want to give you an offer."
"...what kind?"
"What if you were able to gain abilities most people can only dream of? Become as strong and capable...as an Avenger?"
"...I'd say you're as convincing as a Subway commercial."
"What Aogiri right now is doing is only the symptom. The demand for extraordinary soldiers is increasing each day. You won't be just better. We can make you better than better. Equal...to Kuzuri."
I really wanted to whup his ass there and then. But what he said before...was what I've been looking for the entire time I lived in Vancouver.
"I'm in."
"Wonderful. I am so excited for you. Please follow me."
Hide followed the recruiter to a black car, which took him to an undisclosed location where there were only a series of hallways leading to a pair of doors. The recruiter stopped just in time for a pair of grunts in black shirts and jeans arrived to guide Hide where they wanted him to go, to which Hide asked the recruiter,
"You're not coming?"
"Unfortunately, I have more to recruit. Rest assured, Mr. Nagachika. You're in good hands."
Obviously, I had doubts...but I finally got to where I needed to be.
"Smell you later then."
The two grunts guided Hide to a makeshift hospital room. Hide saw a lot of the patients in various states of distress and pain. He even sees a few of them treated as if they were burdens instead of patients. Hide eventually reached a black leather stretcher table and sat on it. Soon, two individuals, one male wearing a doctor's coat and one female dressed as in mercenary wear, arrived to introduce themselves.
"You mind laying down?"
"...Sure."
Hide did what he asked. The female mercenary started to strap Hide to the stretcher.
"Think we can come up with a safe word? I'm thinking "Kono wa Dio da.""
The mercenary then strapped his neck, which irritated Hide.
"I get it. You can snap a baby's neck like a toothpick."
When the mercenary was done, the doctor says,
"Thank you, Angel. Welcome, Mr. Nagachika. The name is Ajax."
"Are you the counselor for superhero camp?"
"Shut the fuck up."
Said Angel. Ajax then started to perform an examination on Hide.
"As you can see, I am the manager of this...workshop."
As he finished, he continues with,
"You know, my welcoming speech used to be filled with so much euphemisms. Unfortunately for you, I've grown blunt. This is not a government-led program. It's a private institution that turns people like you into..."
"Weapons?"
Before Angel could do anything, Ajax raised his hand to signal her to stop.
"So you have an idea of what we do then?"
"Big ass idea."
Angel gagged Hide with a cloth rag.
"I'll have to thank the recruiter for bringing you to me. Having someone connected to the Kuzuri may be the break I've been looking for."
Ajax then inserted a needle with a tube on the other end into Hide's left arm.
"This is a serum that will activate any mutant genes lurking in your DNA. We need you in extreme stress for it to work. To that end, you will be subjected to numerous...procedures dedicated to bringing out your mutant abilities."
Ajax activated a small pump that slowly injected Hide with said serum.
"Ever heard the phrase "to make an omelet, you have to break a few eggs?" This demands me to hurt you, Mr. Nagachika."
Ajax brought out an injector containing some yellow and red fluid that he also wanted injected into Hide.
"You know before I was in charge, I used to be in something like this. When I survived, I had multiple mutant abilities. My nerves were severely desensitized to the point where I can no longer feel pain. But my reflexes were enhanced so...might give Captain America a run for his money. My intelligence was heightened as well, enough for me to understand how my mutant powers were awakened exactly. Caught the eye of the man who placed me here."
Although Hide talked, the rag muffled his voice. Ajax signaled Angel to remove it.
"That man wouldn't be Akihiro Kanou, would it?"
Ajax raised one eyebrow in response to the question.
"Guess your best friend told you a lot of things that will make things...very hard for you."
"You wanna talk about hard? There's a little bit of spinach on your teeth."
Ajax immediately went to a nearby mirror, only to see nothing. Hide laughed a little before telling him,
"Made you look, asshole. By the way, why Ajax? You sound like something out of an experimental Disney cartoon Walt never wanted out. What is it? Alex? Jenner? Elliot? Julio? Bob the burger?"
Hide spoke in a faux-British voice when he said,
"Is it Graham Chapman?"
"Joke away all you like, little man. One of the things that definitely never survives here...is a sense of humor."
"Challenge accepted, prick."
Ajax then tells Angel,
"He's all yours."
"Come on, man. You're really gonna leave me here with Butch Spice?"
Angel punched Hide in the face hard enough to knock him out. For an unknown amount of time, Hide was subjected to all manner of horrific forms of torture and injected with various serums to activate whatever mutant abilities his DNA may possess. In between these, Hide made friends with a "patient" named Carter. The both of them talked to maintain morale. Right now, they talked about what would make them happy. Carter confessed,
"Making banana pancakes for my kids again."
"Sounds nice, man."
"What about you?"
"Honestly, I never gave it much thought. I mean, I was in college...before my best friend died. After that...I had no clue on what to do with my life. Just made more sense to move on to the next thing."
"That's touching."
Said Ajax, eavesdropping on their conversation. Carter responded,
"We were just talking."
"It's fine. I encourage distraction. Wouldn't want you giving up on us, now would we?"
"Let him talk like he's tough shit, Carter. Believe me, he's anything but with a name like FRANCIS!"
In disbelief, Carter asked,
"Francis?"
"Yep. That's his actual name. He got Ajax from dish soap."
Both started to laugh at Ajax's real name before he went to Hide. He sees Hide holding something in his hand.
"Snagged the dry cleaning off your coat. By the way, don't ask me for the superhero discount."
"You are relentlessly annoying, you know that?"
"Part of my charm."
"I would ask you to shut the fuck up, but we both know that would never happen."
"Ding-ding, motherfucker."
"Maybe I'll sew your mouth shut."
"Oh...you don't want to do that. By the way, one problem with 24/7 torture. You can't step it up from there."
"Now that's something you never want to accuse me of, Hideyoshi. The one thing I managed to keep with me all this time...is my imagination."
Hide then got strapped to another stretcher. One that was attached to some sort of cylindrical chamber. Francis tells Hide,
"If this doesn't unlock your mutation...well, it may kill you. Either way, I win. Now, what this chamber does is it lowers the oxygen concentration in the air to the exact point where you feel like you're suffocating. If you feel like you're going to pass out, then we turn up the O2. When you feel like you're catching up to your breath we turn it back down. That's how you're gonna be for, let's say...128 hours, give or take."
"Jesus...and I thought you people were dicks before, but you're putting Loki to shame."
Francis chuckle a little before telling Hide,
"You want to know the funniest thing about this? Turning you into a weapon was an outcome we gave on for quite some time actually. No...what we're aiming for is a super-slave. Sold to the highest bidder for god knows what, actually. Terrorizing citizens, putting down freedom fighters...or just cleaning up dog shit."
"Okay, honest question. What in the ever-living fuck is wrong with you?"
"Lot of things. Enjoy your weekend."
The chamber closed by itself, with the air distribution system being automated to Francis' specifications.
What I endured all this time made me the mutant you see today...
Hide's mind was close to its breaking point every time the chamber gave him relief only for the air in the chamber go back to its low levels. During this, Hide's mutation finally came to be. His mutation caused his skin to lacerate by itself. Hide saw this in the reflection of the glass and wanted to scream in terror, but the lack of oxygen made it difficult to do so.
But to be brutally honest...I wanted to kill Francis with my own two hands if I had a chance.
All he could do were small bursts of guttural grunts that conveyed his rage and horror. After some time passed, Francis return to check up on Hide. Looking pleased that his experiment worked, but also a little shocked at how Hide looked.
"Fucking hell. Looks like you just lost your shot at homecoming king."
Hide caught up with his breath before angrily yelling,
"THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO ME?"
"What we've been doing since you got here. Managing your stress level high enough to trigger a mutation."
"You sadistic fuck!"
Exclaimed Hide. However, Francis stood unfazed as calmly replied,
"I've made you better, Hide. You see, what I also injected into you some time ago is also a special kind of serum that perfectly replicates Wolverine's healing factor. AKA...Ken Kaneki's healing power. Congratulations, Hideyoshi. You can survive almost everything. Now, what you look like...is a side effect I've seen before. Hell, I can even cure it...but where's the fun in that?"
Hide still angry at Francis for what he did to him. Francis, however, did not care.
"But...we can avoid that. Just answer this question: what's my name?"
Hide did not say anything. He still looked angry at Francis, but hopeless was present within his expression. Enough to convince Francis to go the opposite direction with him.
"Just as I thought. Angel."
Angel proceeded to release Hide form the straps but Hide headbutted her. Angel got angry at this and wanted to kill him. Francis stood in the way between Hide and her.
"Relax."
Francis turned his attention to Hide.
"Now that means extra time out."
Francis shut the chamber, making Hide go through what he suffered before.
I wanted that fucker to think that I was being defiant for nothing. I headbutted Angel because I saw what she had on her lips since I first met her. She had a match...and I was in an oxygen tube.
Hide hid the match in his mouth and spat exactly to his left hand.
Apparently my mutation was more than a healing factor. I also had enhanced agility and reflexes. I couldn't do what I did in that tube as I used to be before. At least not with that level of accuracy.
Hide finally lit the match and threw it near one of the vent where the oxygen came from. Although it took a while, the fire successfully ignited the incoming oxygen. The result was a massive explosion that blew away the chamber Hide was locked into. The rest of the room got on fire, panicking the rest of the patients inside. Francis hears the explosion, went to where it happened, and grabbed a nearby extinguisher to put them out. As he put out whatever fires in his path, he looks around to see where it first happened. Francis sees the chamber he placed Hide in empty and feared the worst. His fears came to pass when Hide leapt out of the smoke to attack him. Francis reacted quickly to dodge Hide fist, but Hide was relentless against Francis. Hide got a couple of hits in before Francis figured out his pattern and avoided more hits from his subject. Both had extinguishers and used them as weapons to hit each other with while the fire raged on around the two of them. Hide switched tactics as he threw the extinguisher he held at Francis, distracting for a little while before switching to his fists. Hide grabbed Francis by his neck, slammed him to a nearby supporting beam, and punched the living daylight out of Francis. Francis, however, was unaffected by this and took advantage of an opportunity as he got Hide into a headlock and tells him,
"You don't want me dead. I'm the only one who can fix your ugly mug."
"You honestly think I give a fuck about that right now?"
Francis became surprised by this, giving Hide an opportunity of his own as he flipped Francis to the floor and resumed punching him a few more time before telling him,
"You're right. I don't want to kill you. But only until one of two things happen. One, you tell me where Kanou is. Two, I stalk you until I see you meeting him. Either way, I get my revenge and kill a sadistic motherfucker with a lame-ass name like you in the process."
"You want revenge on me? I'm touched."
"NO! Revenge on Kanou, you narcissistic fuck!"
Francis now felt anger towards Hide as he headbutted him. Hide slowly shook it off before telling Francis,
"You see, I also find you relentlessly annoying. The fact that I need a pretentious asshole like to get to my target ANNOYS THE LIVING FUCK OUT OF ME...but hey. That's life. You have to get through the things that you hate to get what you want."
Francis located a near rebar rod and used it as a weapon.
"What's my name?"
Francis started swinging the rod at Hide. Although he dodged the initial attacks, Francis closed the gap and started hitting Hide with precision. Hide felt fatigue slowing him down but remained focused on getting Francis where he wanted him. He remembered the roof of the room beginning to cave in. Hide walked backwards while taking a few more hit from his enemy. Francis began to feel cocky as he asked Hide again,
"What's my name?"
Hide smiled, leaving Francis confused. Until He heard something starting to crumble. He looks up to see a portion of the roof of the room starting to fall apart and realizes that he stood underneath it. Hide reacted in time to punch Francis in one of his kneecaps, causing him to kneel. Before the roof collapsed, Hide tells him,
"Francis."
The roof finally crashed down on Francis. Hide knew that Francis would most probably survive this. Hide wanted him there to slow him down long enough for him to get Carter out of there. Hide ran while carrying Carter out of the building, which got on fire itself. Hide placed Carter on a nearby bench before heading back to Francis. Nevertheless, it was too late. The building collapsed before Hide could get to Francis.
Needless to say, I was fucked. True, I went for Carter because he didn't deserve it...but Francis was my only link to Kanou. So you can understand how pissed I was on that day.
After getting treated at a nearby hospital, Hide contacted Weasel to let him know he was alive. As he waited, Hide was shocked to learn that he was missing for 18 months.
xxxxxx
When he made it to Sister Margaret's, Weasel was shocked to see what was done to him.
"Fuck, man."
"How the fuck do you think I feel? Fucking Francis made me look like what if Rocky Dennis and the Elephant Man fucked around and one of them got pregnant in the process."
"I know man. You look like a human chihuahua, but like an old one."
"Tell me about it!"
"Honestly, if you ever watched Ren and Stimpy, you're definitely Ren but if he contracted AIDS."
"I GOT THE FUCKING POINT!"
Hide sat at the same table Weasel sat at. Weasel had on it a tequila bottle a couple of shot glasses. He poured some into one of the glasses, to which Hide drank from.
"For real, man. Fuck that Francis guy."
Hide gave a heavy sigh before replying,
"You got that right."
"You sure you want this guy to actually be alive somewhere?"
"...yeah. I was looking for leads for a reason."
"Right. I read up on this Kanou guy you're hunting down. Wanted by SHIELD and every GCB office in every country? You know he's laying low."
"Pretty much."
Hide took another shot of tequila before continuing.
"If I want Kanou, I need fucking Francis. At least I know this much: if he's continuing his experiments, it's all funded somehow."
"I get what you're saying. Follow the money. Fuck him like how Nixon got fucked."
"Yeah, but he knows I survived."
"Maybe hunt down as someone else."
"Like...find him...but with a mask?"
"Yes. A very thick mask. All the time. Look man. I'm sorry if you feel like I'm harping on you...but you are haunting to look at. Seriously, you face is the stuff of nightmares."
"That'll do, pig."
Weasel took a shot before continuing.
"All right, now you need a suit and a nickname. Like Hide the Hunter. Or Yo Yoshi. Mr. Neverdie...oh shit."
"What?"
"I put all my money on you and now...I just realized that I'm never gonna win the..."
"Dead pool."
That was the start of how I became the kick-ass superhero you know today. A name that carried as much death as Bad-Assness.
"Captain Deadpool..."
Weasel sat unimpressed. Which Hide immediately got.
"Just Deadpool. Yeah, just Deadpool."
Weasel poured tequila into both shot glasses and raised the one on his side.
"To you, Mr. Pool."
Hide raised his and performed a toast with Weasel.
"Deadpool. Now that sounds like an Avenger."
xxxxxx
(play Deadpool Rap - Teamheadkick [Deadpool Original Soundtrack Album])
Hide bought a white hoodie and sweatpants to match and knitted together a makeshift mask to hide his face. He then stood in front of a bulletin board that held a map of Vancouver, as well as the locations of possible underground rackets Francis may have used to fund his operation. Hide says to himself,
"This shit's gonna have nuts in it."
The first location he went to; Hide (as Deadpool) started to beat up some grunts. He killed a couple before one of them started to shoot at Hide. Although the shots landed, Hide stood unaffected. Annoyed by this, Deadpool asked,
"Where's Francis?"
Deadpool received nothing from this, except his outfit mostly covered in his blood.
(pause music)
He tried to wash it off in a nearby laundromat, to no avail. He even bought a large amount of bleach sticks to fix, again to no avail. A nearby woman in the middle of her laundry gave him advice, which weirded him out.
"Seltzer water and lemon for blood. Or just wear red, dumbass."
Hide noticed that she was blind, which explains how she could sniff the blood on his outfit from a distance.
"...and...who are you?"
The blind woman puts all of her laundry in the washer before introducing herself.
"The name's Blind Al. Weasel called me. Told me you're hunting for some motherfucker called Francis. Asked me if to give you pointers time to time."
Although Hide wanted to say no, he did not deny that how bad today was. After some thought, he asked Al,
"...What's your price?"
"Cocaine. You find some, give it to me. I'll point you in the right direction."
"...Cool."
The two shook hands in agreement.
(resume music at 0:50)
Hide remade his outfit to be mostly red with some black, closer to its final incarnation. The next couple of leads, provided to him by Al, were an arms dealer and an underground boxing ring. The arms dealer had nothing on Francis, but Deadpool took some ammo for his two Desert Eagle pistols and a pair of katanas. Then he went to fight club, but the promoter of the fight had nothing on Francis as well. Deadpool further refined his costume to what it looks like today, which left a mark on the criminal underground of Vancouver, which was a lot more extensive then even Deadpool thought. Rumors began to spread about Deadpool, to the point that he finally found someone who knows where Francis might be.
"Tell me where your boss is, and I'm out of your fucking hair."
The lead compelled Deadpool to head to a location 55 miles west of San Jose, Guatemala, where a drug cartel (ran by ghouls) regularly does business with the one they call Ajax. After a bloody one-man massacre, Deadpool asked the head of the cartel,
"DONDE ESTA FRANCESCA?!"
"Q-Que?"
Deadpool shot both the kneecaps of the cartel head before asking again,
"DONDE ESTA FRANCESCA?!"
The cartel head again looked confused, much to Deadpool's irritation as he had no choice but say the word,
"Ajax."
The cartel head recognized who Deadpool spoke about and told him about how Ajax guarded one of the entry way he could smuggle his drugs into Canada via Vancouver Island. He also confessed that the island is also where he will meet with an Iranian dignitary to sell some weapons. What he lacked was the date of the sale. Deadpool then calmly replies,
"Mucha gracias."
Deadpool shot the ghoul in the head before heading back to Canada. We went back via a high speed mid-sized yacht that he loaded with 80 gallons of gas and 80 pounds of cocaine.
(end music)
xxxxxx
The recruiter visited a veteran who was practically on death's door. As he left with a pair of bodyguards, Deadpool made himself known to him.
"Hi Jared."
The recruiter and his bodyguards looked up to see the costumed individual stepping out of the darkness. The bodyguards were confused as to who this person was, but the recruiter knew all too well just by his voice alone.
"I'll take the meatball footlong."
The recruiter instantly ran while his bodyguards instantly shot at Deadpool. Deadpool dodged most of the shots, but the ones that landed did not faze him as Deadpool killed the both of them with relative ease. He then hunted down the recruiter through a local market. The recruiter sees Deadpool chasing after him and pushed some of the people within the market to slow him down. Deadpool, however, proved himself more than agile to dodge the fallen people, which made the recruiter more scared than before. Soon, he caught up to the Recruiter as Deadpool slammed him to a nearby wall.
"Hiya, dick."
"Mr. Nagachika?"
"Let me guess: you thought I was dead? Or were you really busting your ass to avoid me?"
"...a little of the other thing."
"Well, that just blew up in your face."
"This is not gonna end well for me, is it?"
"This is not gonna end well for you, no. But not here."
Deadpool took out smartphone and called someone.
"Where are you?"
A car honked, signaling to Deadpool where his driver was. He then tells the recruiter,
"I want you to meet a couple friends of mine. They're just as nasty as I am. Well, the blind one is. Crusty as they come."
xxxxxx
The recruiter was in a small room, tied to a chair with duct tape and blindfolded. Weasel and Deadpool sat down for a little while as the effort to tie up the recruiter as a struggle as he resisted whenever he saw the opportunity. They also wanted to scare the recruiter a little, to prime him up for Al's torture. Al asked,
"Okay. How do you want to do this?"
"I don't think he'll be that hard to crack. Maybe scare him."
Said Weasel. Hide, however, was of a different mind.
"No...this pedophile-looking piece of shit deserves to rot in a grave."
"I can go either way, but I need an answer. He's gonna get less scared the more we keep him waiting."
Hide gave an answer.
"Alright. Scare the answer out of him. If you need to ramp it up, tell me what you need."
"I got a toolbox near the refrigerator. Hold it for me until I tell you."
"Just don't forget..."
"Francis, Vancouver Island, and weapons deal date. I got all that."
Al brought with her only her cane. She then stepped inside the room, with a very scared recruiter not knowing who was inside. He hopelessly tried to hold back his tears, which irritated Al a little.
"Hey there. Don't get too used to this."
"...A-a-a-a..."
"A-a-a-a-a-a. Did you turn into a dipshit all of a sudden?"
"A-are you gonna let me go?"
"Depends. What you got?"
"W-what do you want?"
"A date."
"...W-what kind?"
"Here's a hint: Your boss and Vancouver Island."
"How do you know-?"
"I make it my business to know. And I got somebody on the other side of that door who wants to know about when a certain weapons deal is gonna take place."
"Y-you're referring to Mr. Nagachika?"
"Good news. Now I know you're not a dipshit."
Al grabbed the recruiter by one of his ears, which made him cry a little further.
"But you're definitely a pussy. Maybe I won't need them after all."
The recruiter whimpered for his life, which further irritated Al as she asked,
"Date of the sale. When is it?"
"T-T-Tomorrow!"
"You for real right now?"
"YES! Yes."
"I need more than that."
"He-he has a private airfield on the island. No one can find it. But..."
"But what?"
"The route he takes after his personal ferry leaves from Discovery Harbor Marina to the Horseshoe Bay Terminal, he takes the Trans-Canada highway before reaching the 99 to a secret location in North Vancouver. Please don't kill me."
"I won't..."
Al removed the blindfold to reveal to the recruiter who he just revealed what he knew to. Al could teel how much in disbelief he was right now.
"I get it. I was really working with this guy."
Hide, in his Deadpool outfit minus the mask, received the largest reaction from the recruiter as he pleaded for his life.
"NO! PLEASE!"
Hide brought out one of his pistols and shot the recruiter in the head multiple times. What made Weasel a little scared was how unaffected Hide looked when he killed the recruiter. When the deed was done, he exclaimed to both Al and Weasel,
"FUCK ME! HE WAS STILL HERE?! ALL THIS FUCKING TIME?! Fuck! I went to Guatemala for this...PRICK, and he was in North Vancouver?!"
"Dude, we're just as shocked as you are right now."
Hide gave a dissatisfying grunt before telling the both of them,
"I'm heading out."
"You're really gonna wait at the 99 for him?"
"Yes I am, Al. Don't try to stop me."
Hide brought with him only his guns and his swords before leaving Al's apartment. When he left, Weasel asked Al,
"He does know he needs more ammo than what his guns have?"
"Yeah...it'll come back to bite him in the ass."
xxxxxx
(Vancouver Island, the next day)
In the early hours of the morning, on an airfield hidden from both maps and radar, Francis sat atop some large cases as a long black helicopter arrived. Francis had with him his usual people, and at least 40 armed guards. When the helicopter landed, who exited the helicopter was an Iranian dignitary, with some American soldiers as bodyguards. Francis got up and tells him,
"They won't disappoint."
"They better not."
"I got a guarantee that these reverse-engineered Shi'ar weapons are reliable."
"Hmm...and what about next month's shipment?"
"Well about that...there won't be one."
"What?"
"You're not the only one with a war to win. And they pay more."
"That won't do."
"Well, it's not only a matter of payment. You see, we've had a little disruption to our supply chain..."
Francis grabbed the dignitary by his neck as a show of intimidation, which prompted some of the America soldiers to aim their weapons at him. Francis' armed guard did the same at the soldiers.
"We'd appreciate your patience as we try to solve our little predicament."
Francis gently put down the dignitary before telling him,
"Pleasure doing business with you."
As the soldiers retrieved the weapons, the dignitary muttered to himself,
"Fucking mutant."
Francis' personal convoy headed back to North Vancouver. By the time the ferry got close to the Horseshoe Bay Terminal, it was already the afternoon. During this, Angel called Francis,
"Hey there."
"We got a problem."
"What is it now?"
"The recruiter's gone missing."
"Probably a revenge killing from one of his victims."
"I've had a couple of cops on our payroll look into it. It's Deadpool. He's hit us again."
Francis looked a little distressed when Angel mentioned him.
"Hide...he's going after me."
"Shit...you don't think he's the guy who fucked up our operations in Guatemala?"
"It'll be stupid of us to think it's not him. Boss certainly sounded pissed off when I told him that. I'll keep an eye out."
"Please. He's fucking up everything."
"Got it."
When the ferry carrying the convoy finally docked at the Terminal, they headed toward North Vancouver.
(play Shoop – Salt n Peppa)
At one of the bridges above the 99 highway, Deadpool waited with a little radio besides him. Although he still felt anger within him, the music calmed him down a little. He says to himself,
"Huh...so is this what Kaneki enjoys? Not bad..."
Soon, he sees some cars perfectly lined up with a motorcycle in front of them.
"There you are, Francis."
Deadpool stood up from where he sat, which was on the edge of a side of a bridge overseeing the route the convoy was taking. Deadpool says to himself before dropping,
"Maximum effort."
(pause music)
One of the inside of the cars was listening to some Celine Dion before Deadpool crashed through the overhead window. The goons inside the car reacted quickly to Deadpool, leading to car fight. Deadpool fought back against the goon, which led to one of them slamming his head against the radio.
(resume music)
"Holy shit! I was just listening to that!"
The fight went on, much to the notice as the rest of the convoy. One of the motorcyclists sped to the car where Deadpool crashed into while the rest of the convoy slowed down to allow the lone motorcyclist to handle what was going on. The motorcyclist had on him a submachine gun and shot at the car. Deadpool blocked most of the shots with one of the goons as a meat shield. one of the goons was shot dead as a result, which prompted Deadpool to use the corpse as a means to hit the motorcyclist. The result was chaos on the highway as the motorcyclist was hit, his bike sliding on the road, starting a chain reaction that destroyed five cars in the process. Two of the goons inside the car were still alive. One who was still driving the car and another who survived Deadpool's initial attack. The driver took out a gun but Deadpool grabbed the driver's arms and redirected the shot to the last surviving goon. The driver regained his arm and tried to shoot at Deadpool but was denied when Deadpool proved himself to be stronger than the driver and forced the gun into the driver's mouth, causing the driver to shoot himself. The corpse stepped on the gas, causing the car to veer out of control. The car made a slow turn, causing it to slide a little before tumbling down the road before flipping into the air and then crashing on its side.
(end music)
The people on the road stopped their cars and ran away from where the crash happened.
Not gonna lie...I had zero control. Mostly because I so pissed at Francis...that things got out of hand...managed to catch the attention of your old team actually.
xxxxxx
A news copter arrived at the scene of the crash, reporting what was happening on the route 99 highway. What made this scene caught the attention of the X-Men at the mansion was that the news report stated one of the individuals responsible for the scene was a man wearing a red suit as Hank McCoy called for both Colossus and a new member into the conference room near the danger room.
"Hank. Is there problem?"
"Something that the professor has asked me to keep an eye on while the rest of the team is out."
"Elaborate, if you please."
Hank activated the holoscreen, displaying an image of Deadpool.
"This is a mutant that goes by the name of Deadpool. He's been active since a fire broke out and destroyed a building in South Vancouver. Since then, he's been active in the underground, taking on various assassination assignments while hunting down an individual named Francis."
"And this Deadpool is behind what is happening right now on the screen?"
"Perhaps playing a part. Nevertheless, the professor wants to take him in as part of the agreement with Secretary Ross. Deadpool was recently on the government's radar ever since he single-handedly took down a ghoul drug cartel, resulting in a power vacuum that has the entire Central American GCB offices overrun."
"Which could allow Aogiri Tree to take advantage of the chaos and try to establish a branch within the region."
"Precisely."
"I have heard both the professor and Scott arguing with each other about how Ross practically has the X-Men on his beck and call."
"Nonetheless, we need to apprehend him now."
"Very well. Did you catch all that, Negasonic?"
"Got it. Ready when you are."
"Excellent."
Said Colossus. Hank then tells the two of them,
"Construction of the second jet is already done. Good luck."
As Colossus and Negasonic headed to the Blackbird II, she spoke to him about what she heard about.
"Is the team gonna break up again?"
"Not at all. It's just...Scott has a different idea of what taking over for the Avengers means. And the professor..."
"Is punishing himself by engaging in respectability politics?"
Colossus laughed a little at her comment.
"You are not wrong...Just try to remember what we have gain by this. Greater civil rights and expanded protections for mutants. That is what we fight for."
Negasonic sighed before saying,
"Fine."
xxxxxx
The armed guard of the convoy, now reduced to eight guards, exited their cars and aimed at the crashed car, expecting the perpetrator of the crash to survive. One of the few working windows of the crashed car opened as Deadpool took a quick look, the armed guard compelled to fire. Only when Deadpool raised his arms in surrender did they hold back their bullets.
"WAIT!"
Deadpool, however, had something completely different in mind.
"You might be asking yourself, "Why the red suit?""
Some of the guard looked at each other in confusion as to why he asked them a question.
"Well, it's because bad can't see me bleed. This guy's got the right idea."
Deadpool pointed at one of the armed guards, much to his confusion.
"He wore the brown pants."
I realized earlier that I only had a pair of guns that only held six bullets each. Chalked it up to me being angry. I made sure these dicks shared.
Deadpool jumped higher than the car wreckage and shot at two of the armed guards. As the guards shot at the car wreckage one of the motorcyclists sped ahead and shot Deadpool with a submachine gun. Although he survived, Deadpool got angry at this.
"MOTHERFUCKER!"
Deadpool fired three shots at the motorcyclist, but said shots were dodged. Deadpool got to the other side of the car wreck hoping to hit his target, but said target sped away before he could do anything. He then muttered to himself,
"Bad Deadpool."
Deadpool caught sight of one of the armed guards attempting to shoot him, but his rifle got jammed at the worst time. Deadpool shot him in the head and tells himself,
"Good Deadpool."
More gunfire tried to hit him, but Deadpool dodged them all while saving his ammo. One of the guards decided to be proactive in killing Deadpool and started hunting after Deadpool and shooting at him anytime he see the man in red. When he saw Deadpool hiding behind a car, he went over the car, only to see his target lounging around in a comical way. The guard started shooting at him, but his clip was already empty. Something Deadpool noticed.
"Out already? Not me!"
Deadpool got another headshot before taking on the last of the armed guards. He saw two more of them, with one of them about to throw a grenade. Deadpool aimed his gun at the grenade, resulting in the two guards to die in a fiery explosion. Deadpool felt a little satisfied, but such a positive feeling was cut short when one guard shot him in the neck. Deadpool pretended to act as if it was the shot that killed him. The guard slowly approached the seemingly dead assassin until Deadpool got another headshot, killing the guard. He also felt angry as he says,
"Seriously? The neck?!"
Deadpool wasted two shots on a corpse in petty anger.
"That was stupid, but also worth it."
The last of the armed guard starting shooting at Deadpool, but Deadpool carefully waited for the opportunity to take them out in one stroke. And he was successful in doing so as he jumped upwards and towards the guards. Deadpool fired one bullet but managed to achieve the perfect triple headshot as he felt everything slow down around him. The guards' heads were perfectly lined up for one moment and his gun was powerful enough to make the triple headshot possible.
"It's official. Hawkeye ain't got shit on me."
Deadpool was successful in killing all of the guards in the convoy, allowing him to freely locate Francis.
"Francis!"
Deadpool went to the only undamaged car, only to be disappointed to see nobody inside.
"Seriously?! What the shit-biscuit?! WHERE YOU AT, FRANCIS?!"
While Deadpool languished at how he was denied his target again, one of the guards who received a headshot from him slowly got up. Deadpool saw this and felt underwhelmed by it.
"You're not the guy I'm looking for."
The guard removed the bullet that did not penetrate his skull and stood ready to kill Deadpool. Deadpool, however, continued to be underwhelmed as the guard rolled up his sleeves.
"Really? Rolling up the sleeves? That's how I'm gonna see you as a threat?"
The guard then brought a pair of combat knives, but Deadpool brought his katanas and stabbed the guard before lifting him up by his swords before cutting the guard in half. As Deadpool looked around, a realization came to him.
I asked myself this question: among the horde of 200 pound assholes, where would Francis be? Somewhere you can't catch him.
Deadpool realized that Francis was one of the motorcyclists that just shot him. Even now, his target tried to speed away from him, but Deadpool reacted fast by running towards of the cars, jumping from its roof, and threw one of his swords at the wheels of the motorcycle. This caused Francis to crash into the car wreck that Deadpool hid behind earlier.
"A hush falls over the crowd as rookie sensation Hideyoshi Nagachika out of Tokyo, Japan lines up the shot. Shot looks good..."
Deadpool ran little to deliver a kick while Francis was still disorientated.
"HE SCORES! Ladies and gentlemen, you are witnessing sweet dick-kicking payback!"
Deadpool continued to kick Francis while he was still disorientated before slamming him to a nearby highway rail. He then sticks one of his katanas into Francis' left shoulder to make sure he did not go anywhere. His thrust proved itself to be strong enough to penetrate the concrete part of the highway rail. Deadpool then gently pushes Francis' head up before talking to him.
"Hi Francis. Looking good. Well rested. Looks like you've giving shits and never taking them."
Francis only gave wry laugh before replying,
"Hi there, Nagachika."
Hide gave a playful gasp before saying,
"You do remember me."
"I remember what you did in Guatemala. You pissed off the wrong people that day."
"And I want you to tell where they are. Or I'm gonna do to you what Zack Snyder did to Superman."
As Deadpool raised his fist against Francis, he felt it colliding against something metal.
"Oh boy..."
Deadpool looked behind him to see an angry Colossus.
"Hi there, Colossus...look, I can explain."
Colossus threw Deadpool to a nearby car.
Once Colossus was in the picture, shit went sideways. At that moment when I discovered Colossus was standing behind me, for some reason, I started to weigh the pros and cons of the whole superhero profession. Pros: no shortage of people who love you and want to do stuff with you, local dry-cleaning discounts, and if you're lucky, lucrative movie deals (both origin stories and larger ensemble team-ups). Cons: they're all teacher pets.
Colossus tells Negasonic,
"Negasonic, keep eye on him."
She nodded to him as Colossus walked toward Deadpool.
"Colossus, there's a good reason for everything."
"I am sure of that, Deadpool. Nevertheless, you will answer for your crimes. Especially Guatemala."
"Dude, I've been trying to hunt down that prick for the past and you want to crawl up my ass for that?! Besides, I saw how the drug cartel treated everyone near them. I did the Guatemalans a favor."
"That is not for you to decide!"
"Hey! You can get snippy with me all you like with your goody two-shoes bullshit! But right now, that asshole has something I need. So either tell your little partner over there...sorry, I didn't quite catch your name."
"...Negasonic Teenage Warhead."
Deadpool looked at her with disbelief before saying,
"Okay, is there a shortage of names or something?"
"Deadpool! Just come quietly."
Deadpool gave an exasperated sigh before telling Colossus,
"Fine. But take him in the process."
Curious, Colossus asked,
"Why is he important to you?"
"Because that wheezing bag of dick-tips has information on the location of Akihiro Kanou."
Colossus now looked shocked as Deadpool was aware of the existence of Akihiro Kanou. Someone that was only known to a select few outside of Japan.
"How do you know that name?"
Deadpool gave another sigh of exasperation before deciding to remove the mask. Although Negasonic immediately felt grossed out by what she saw, Colossus stood stunned by who Deadpool really was.
"Hideyoshi Nagachika?"
"Hey Piotr. Long time no see. I've been hunting this prick to get to Kanou. Yeah, I hate him for what he did to me, but getting revenge on Kanou was a bigger priority."
Francis took advantage of everyone distracted by Hide in order to escape. He started to pull the katana from his shoulder while Hide talked to Piotr as Negasonic asked,
"Colossus, you know this guy?"
"This is Hideyoshi Nagachika. A friend of a comrade of mine. The Kuzuri."
Negasonic looked mildly impressed as she asked,
"You knew the Kuzuri?"
"We went to school and college together. Only after the 11th ward incident did he go away to live with the X-Men..."
"Before he died."
Finished Negasonic before adding,
"I'm sorry, man."
Piotr then tells Hide,
"Hideyoshi, I must tell you two things. First, what you did as Deadpool...I cannot overlook it. I must take you to mansion."
"Like I said, only if you take that-"
Hide went from somber to outraged when he saw Francis escape on his motorcycle. This got Piotr irritated as he asked Negasonic,
"I thought I told you to keep eye on him?"
"..my bad."
"Oh, your bad?! YOUR BAD?! I SPENT ALMOST TWO YEARS HUNTING THE PRICK AND HE GET AWAY BECAUSE TIKITOK GAVE YOU AN ATTENTION SPAN THE SIZE OF A COCKTAIL WEENIE?!"
"Hide!"
"DON'T YOU START WITH ME, YOU BIG CHROMED COCK-GOBBLER!"
"That's not nice."
"I mean...do you realize just how much you fucked this up for me?!"
"Hide, listen."
"I suffered through some of the most horrific shit of my life...!"
"It is the second thing."
"Looking like this!"
Hide pointed to his face.
"All to get revenge for what Kanou..."
"It's about that."
"FOR WHAT HE DID TO MY BEST-!"
"Ken Kaneki is alive!"
Hide stopped his tirade. He stood with stunned silence before asking,
"Could you say that again on account of it being un-fucking-believable?"
"Ken is alive and back in Tokyo."
Hide now stood completely speechless by what he just heard. Something which even unnerved Negasonic as the look of shock of his face enhanced how his scars made it harder to look at him.
"How?"
"That is what we are trying to figure out. Come with me."
Hide finally relented and agreed to go with Piotr. Before they boarded the Blackbird Mk. II, Negasonic asked Hide,
" Can you please put the mask back on? It's just that you're ugly as fuck."
"Negasonic!"
Admonished Piotr. Hide, however, responded,
"No. She's right."
"Hide, there is no need to be ashamed of yourself."
"All the same, Piotr."
Hide placed his mask back on him. As the Piotr piloted the Blackbird Mk. II, Hide texted Weasel, saying he's going to be out of town for a while longer. He also notified him of the remainder of cocaine to give to Al.
Yesterday was the last day I'd see Al again. He OD on the last of the cocaine I had saved up for her. I do feel bad about it, but she loved her powder so damn much. Anyhow, the next part was the start of how I got the Japanese GCB to get me into the X-Force.
xxxxxx
Hank examined Hide as to examine how his latent mutant abilities were active, despite the explanation Hide gave on how Francis was able to do it.
"It's still as astonishing as it is abominable what happened to you."
"Well, It's on me for willingly going into this."
"Perhaps...nevertheless, I'm sorry."
"It's fine, doc. At the very least, I'm not gonna die in the near future."
"Only if your healing factor stays active."
"...Could you repeat that last part?"
Hank groaned at himself as he told Hide something he wanted to keep it to himself.
"It's...the reason why you look like you do."
"Okay. I'm lost here."
Hank gave a heavy sigh before explaining the why of Hide's appearance.
"Apparently, within your genetic code are certain genes that will make you most likely to develop cancer at a later age."
Hide sat with shock that he would've developed cancer later on in life.
"When "Francis" awakened your mutant abilities, he also must've accidently activated the genes linked to cancer cells. Yes, you can heal any injuries, but because your healing factor is constantly battling your cancer at the same time, your healing will act slower than Ken's. For example, say your hand was chopped off. A regular healing factor will make grow another in the same size as before in a short amount of time. However, since your healing factor is occupied with eradicating your cancer, it heals in stages."
"So, what? My hand comes back but first, it's like, baby-sized?"
"...Basically."
Honestly...I didn't know whether to laugh or get angry. So, I went with my first instinct.
Hide stood up from the stool he sat earlier to take a couple of deep breaths. Then he started to laugh, which confused Hank to no end.
"Sorry, Doctor McCoy. Just going with my first instinct."
Soon, Hide got all the laughs out of his system before asking,
"I appreciate you checking on me, doc. But now I want to learn how Kaneki is alive. I remember seeing him in a casket. What, did somebody desecrate his body to make a clone or something?"
Hank took off his glasses for a moment before telling Hide,
"I wish I had all the straight answers. If you're willing to wait, Scott is returning with the team from a mission. He contacted me earlier saying he'll be back within the hour."
"All right. I'll wait."
"Excellent. Make yourself at home."
xxxxxx
(one hour later)
The Blackbird Mk. I returned to the mansion. Hank and Piotr were the first to greet the team. Scott and Emma were still in charge; with the team comprising of Gambit, Rogue, Nightcrawler, Morph, Shadowcat, and Sunspot. The first one to exit was Scott.
"Hank."
"Good to see you back in one piece."
"Well, helping to take down an AIM branch is never easy work."
"I thought the professor was with you..."
Scott looked a little disgruntled, to which Emma gave Hank the details.
"The Professor has...another meeting with Secretary Ross. Alongside with Jean. They won't be back until later on tonight."
"Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later. Well, I have some good news...depending on how you see it."
"What is it, Hank?"
Asked Scott.
"We have Deadpool."
"You serious?"
Asked Emma, to which Hank replies,
"Indeed. But there's more to it."
The rest of the team were curious as to what Hank meant.
When Scott and Emma first saw me, they were floored. And what I told them did not make them calm. I didn't argue on the fact that a lot of what I did in Vancouver was illegal to the letter. And considering that I know Kaneki was alive, it made my hunt for Francis almost meaningless. However, it was because of my hunt for Francis that Scott didn't want to take me to the Raft.
"Hide, you said that you were hunting down this Francis person because he was connected to Akihiro Kanou?"
"He told that he used to be one of his text subjects, but now he's one of his trusted lieutenants or something like that. Either way, he's the link to Kanou."
"That's right. But because you told me Kaneki's alive, locating him just became moot."
"Actually he's still an important target for us. And we need your help for that."
"But what about Kaneki?"
"Well, about that..."
Scott told me how the Yashida corporation used their connections in the government to prevent the X-Men from entering Japan again. Short of a worldwide cataclysm, they were barred from entering the country. What they were able to gather based on what Shadowcat was able to gather with her hacking skills and Laura now living in Tokyo, that was how I found out that not only were you were with the GCB, but that you were also the great-grandson of Ichiro Yashida. You can imagine how confused I was at the time.
After hearing everything both Scott and Emma told him, Hide simply responded,
"Damn..."
"I know how you feel. That's why...I have a proposal..."
"Is it finding Francis?"
"Well, if what you give us proves itself to be a legitimate lead toward Kanou, then not only will we point you in the right direction to get you closer to Kaneki, but also clear your criminal record."
"You had me on the first part."
Replied Hide with a smile on his face.
xxxxxx
(one hour later)
Hide stayed behind with Piotr and Negasonic until Scott came back with the team. However, it was with empty hands as Hide asked,
"How was it?"
"Well, we got the jump on him. He sent many of his guards to slow us down as he got away. Even his right-hand woman managed to get the upper hand on most of us. By the time we were close to capturing him, he blew up the place in order to escape our custody."
"What did he blow up exactly?"
Asked Hide. Emma answered,
"A decommissioned helicarrier."
"FOR REAL?!"
Exclaimed Hide.
"Unfortunately. So, yes. We believe you Hide. And we won't rest until we have Francis behind bars."
"That's cool. Now about the other thing."
"Don't worry. We called someone to pick you up right about..."
The doorbell of the mansion rang.
"Now."
"Oh wow. That was so perfectly timed, makes me wonder if you're some sort of magic man..."
Said Hide in a sarcastic tone. Scott was confused by this when he asked Emma,
"That wasn't over the top, right?"
"Uh...a little bit, darling."
Hide opened the doors to see Mystique standing in front of her, alongside two young women standing separating behind her. Both wore suits of opposite colors (one wore black, the other white) with masks to match. Mystique asked him,
"Hideyoshi Nagachika, I assume?"
"And...you're Mystique. Along with...monochrome Tweedledee and Dum?"
Hide called the black suited individual Tweedledum, which angered her. Mystique sees this and tells her,
"Easy, Kurona. I'll tell you when to break his legs."
"...yes Ma'am."
Kurona backed off before Mystique saw Scott and Emma approaching the mansion entrance.
"This is the one?"
"Yes. He's under your authority now."
"He's tough, but also new to teamwork."
Confused, Hide asked,
"Excuse me?"
Both Emma and Scott took turns explaining to Hide about what they meant.
"Hide...me and Emma, behind the professor's back, have been corresponding with Magneto. Like me, he's worried about how much Charles has been kowtowing to Ross a little too much."
"When Charles allowed the X-Men to take over the responsibilities of the Avengers, he demanded Ross to include in the Sokovia accords to include internationally recognized civil rights and protections for mutants."
"It was a major advancement, to be sure. But..."
"Charles' need to please people in power has put in a very undesirable spot."
Said Mystique, finishing Emma's sentence. Scott elaborated on that.
"When Ross meant the responsibilities of the Avengers, what he meant was a super-powered black ops unit that serves America's interests."
"And that means..."
"Asserting America's place as the dominant superpower."
Said Hide, mildly surprising everyone. He tells them,
"Back when I was in high school, I used to play the Metal Gear Solid video games a lot. And they had a lot to say on the subject. True, I had to google a lot of those points, but I get what you're talking about. Part of the reason why the Avengers were the Avengers was because they didn't obey one country. They acted on what they thought was right."
"Precisely, because of that, The X-Men...went on missions that...blurred the line of right and wrong."
Said Scott, with Emma adding,
"So much so, Storm went back to Wakanda. To make sure that none of "U.S policy" will intrude on Wakandan soil."
"Understandable."
Said Hide. Scott then continued with,
"That's why We've been working with Magneto without the professor knowing, To apprehend the real criminals that need to see justice. Especially for crimes against mutantkind."
"Kanou."
Emma continued with,
"We protested to Ross for the authority to hunt for Akihiro Kanou for his role in Weapon X. Unfortunately..."
"Kanou was considered a mid-priority target whose capture was relegated to the GCB."
Said Mystique, finishing Emma's sentence. Scott finished with,
"And since the GCB have their hands full with Aogiri Tree..."
"Kanou is still out there, doing whatever the hell he wants."
Said Hide. Scott looked a little angry when Hide said that. He notices this and apologized to Scott.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to-"
"I know...it's not you. It's the whole situation. Our position as the Avenger's replacement has put us in a position where we can't go where we need to be."
"That's where you come in."
Said Emma to Hide before Mystique intervened.
"This individual named Francis is connected to Kanou. If you can lead us to him, we can take him back to Genosha. But we need you in Genosha."
Hide pieced together why Scott and Emma handed him to her. He then tells the two,
"Thank you for everything. I'll do everything on my part to help you get Kanou."
He then tells Mystique,
"But only if I can get to Kaneki."
"Believe it or not, he's connected to a larger operation involving the Yashida corporation. But first..."
Mystique pointed to the black car parked in front of the mansion. Before he walked towards it, Hide asked the two guards,
"Never got your names."
Kurona said nothing. But the white suited guard removed her mask to say to him,
"My name is Nashiro. Kurona is my sister."
"Nice to meet you."
Although Kurona was irritated by Hide, Nashiro was a little welcoming to him. Mystique then tells all of them,
"Let's go."
Hide followed them to the black car parked in front of the mansion. Hide looked back to see Scott and Emma seeing them off before getting on the car. As the car left, Emma asked Scott,
"You think he'll get to Kaneki?"
"At this point...he may be our only option."
"Not our only one."
"No...but when it comes to Kanou, he's our best shot."
From there on in, I worked with Mystique in Genosha in hunting down leads on Francis in order to get to Kanou. When we finally got that son of a bitch Francis, it took Mystique a lot of work...but we finally managed to find out where Kanou is, which got us to the Yashida route. Scott had to allow my criminal record be as it was for longer than expect to get the attention of the Madames. Specifically Big Madame.
xxxxxx
(Present time)
"With Kurona and Nashiro's help, I got to be part of the security detail of the auction where we finally met again. Although now I know why Ichiro Yashida used all his connections to keep the X-Men out of Japan for as long as he could."
Kaneki stood astounded as to the lengths he went for him.
"I know it's a lot right now...but we still got a long road ahead of us..."
And this is the start of the second arc of Kuzure;. I thank you all for your patience. Both this and the second half of the finale of the Kuzuri trilogy will be the final fan-fics I will write. As I stated before, real-life commitments demand my full attention. If my profile is still up, it will be only for reading fan-fics, but that's it. I'm sorry for my fans...but like I said...
This is it.