Author's Note: Hey all, I'm alive! Sorry for the month of nothing, I kinda lost the muse to write for a little bit and then Episode Aigis came out and I absolutely poured myself into that and loved every second of it. It inspired me to write some more though, so here's another installment of Pastel Voices for you all!

Thank you everyone for the very kind comments on this story! I'm glad to hear you're enjoying it and I look forward to writing more and more for you! The upload schedule may not be consistent, but I will take you through the events of the story before all's said and done. Anyway, without further ado, I hope you enjoy the new chapter! Thank you all for reading!

Chapter 9 – I am Thou

Several days had passed since the incident at Port Island Station and Fuuka found herself doing well, despite the still awkward air in the dorm. The oppressive hostility had finally waned to a dull discomfort that lingered in the air, but with final exams having arrived at last, there wasn't much time to dwell on it anyway.

Fuuka had tried organizing a few study sessions with everyone but most of them had fallen through. She hadn't managed to get Junpei to join she, Minato, and Yukari, beginning to worry that the former's jealousy would never abate to the point that the two young men could mend their relationship. Kirijo-senpai and Sanada-senpai, on the other hand, had been so distracted that their join study session had yielded very few results.

Finally, Fuuka had just given up and decided to study by herself. To her surprise and delight, though, Minato had joined her without a word and the two had fallen into a natural rhythm together, progressing through the material she had missed during her time trapped in Tartarus back in June. Between Minato's patient teaching and using Natsuki-chan's incomplete notes as a template to fill in and learn from, Fuuka felt far better prepared for exams than she had the entire week leading up to them.

It wasn't lost on her just how well she and Minato worked together.

After studying completely through the Dark Hour the Saturday night before their finals began, the two finally agreed it was time to head to bed. Parting ways on the second floor, Fuuka returned to her room in a bit of a daze. Tomorrow was their day off from school so she wasn't worried about having stayed up a bit late, but still, she should try to get some sleep so she was ready for Monday.

Unfortunately for her, the girl's mind was racing with all sorts of complicated thoughts.

'Why do we work so well together? I suppose it's a natural extension of our time in Tartarus, right? Since I act as the navigator for the team and Minato-kun acts as the field leader, we're usually bouncing ideas and communications off of each other. I suppose by now it's become natural. But…'

As Fuuka finally laid down in her bed and drew the covers up around her, her mind drifted back to the day Minato had rescued her from the drunk man in the alleyway. She had thought about it every single night since it had happened and it never failed to make her heart skip a few beats. She wasn't used to being in the actual depths of Tartarus with him. She was never on the frontlines of battle. Was that how the others felt when he came to their rescue against the Shadows?

Had Yukari-chan also experienced a moment where he had selflessly thrown himself between her and a monster to protect her? Was it possible that even Kirijo-senpai had felt her own guarded heart flutter as he destroyed a Shadow that was preying on her without a second's hesitation?

But that was different. Minato hadn't saved her from Shadows; he had saved her from another person. There were no impossible monsters when he had come to her rescue, no psychic powers given form, no swords or Evokers or armor. No, when Minato had saved her, it had been in real life.

Something about that gave her an intense feeling of delight.

Fuuka couldn't help but kick her feet beneath the blankets as she remembered not just the fire in his eyes as he'd seized the other man's wrist, but also the thunder in his voice as he placed himself between them without a shred of hesitation. He had protected her so wholly and completely that it almost made her feel a bit lightheaded. Not to mention all the wonderfully kind and flattering things he'd said to her after the fact. Not the least of which was about his 'desire to protect someone important to him.'

'Lucia…I think you were right. I think…maybe it's not impossible that he feels towards me something similar to what I feel towards him. But…does that make it okay to act on something like this? Would it destroy our team dynamics even more?'

Lucia still didn't answer with literal words, but Fuuka had learned to interpret her subtle emotional signals quite accurately by now. It made sense that she could intuit what her Persona was communicating to her to the point that it may as well have been spoken language…even if it took several times of repetition for Fuuka to actually believe some of Lucia's more direct encouragements or compliments.

The 'voice' of her Persona echoed through her mind.

'Why do you worry about your team's dynamics changing if you were to admit your feelings towards Minato?'

Fuuka shifted around in bed, trying to get comfortable.

'Well…just look at how Junpei-kun's been feeling lately. He's jealous of Minato-kun; that much is clear. It's not as if he's the weak link of SEES, either…but I can kind of understand where he's coming from. He probably feels inadequate, just like my parents always made me feel. And I guess I'm just worried that…if something were to change between myself and Minato-kun…would that make him feel more jealousy? Would it be like rubbing salt in a fresh wound? Would it completely destroy the friendship between those two?

'To go even further, though…what about Yukari-chan? We haven't ever really talked about it, but what if she secretly likes Minato-kun too? I certainly wouldn't blame her if she did. If things between he and I were to…progress…what if Yukari-chan started to treat me the way Junpei-kun has been treating him? I don't want to lose one of my closest friends. Maybe she's just looking for the right opportunity to make her own feelings known; is it fair for me to walk all over them without a second thought? She's been here longer than me and known Minato-kun since the start of the school year anyway…

'A-and what about our Senpai? I can't see Kirijo-senpai approving of something like that…she'd probably think it would negatively affect our performances in Tartarus and during the full moon missions. I can't blame her for thinking that way; her priority should be to protect us all and solve this crisis as quickly as possible. And Sanada-senpai would probably agree with her on that point. I'm the newest member here and I shouldn't turn the entire team dynamic on its head like that…'

Silence echoed through her mind for several moments before a mixture of exasperation and mild amusement surged through her body.

'Fuuka,' the 'voice' finally began. 'It sounds to me like you're looking for any excuse in the world not to admit your feelings for Minato.'

Fuuka couldn't help but blush and rolled over even further, burying her face into her pillow.

'T…that's not…true. I'm pretty sure I do like him romantically…but…'

'Come now, you can't hide anything from me. You might have finally been able to admit those feelings to yourself, but you're terrified to admit them to him, are you not?'

Fuuka chewed her lip for a moment before flipping over onto her back, the sheets beginning to tangle around her restless body.

'Well…of course I am. If I told him I like him and he didn't feel the same way…things would feel so awkward. I can't risk jeopardizing our relationship as field leader and navigator just for my own selfish desires-'

'You're making excuses again.' Lucia's gentle chiding silenced her thoughts immediately. 'Fuuka, dear, you're not scared of your professional relationship changing; you're scared of being rejected.'

Fuuka let out a long, heavy sigh and closed her eyes.

'Yes. I'm scared to death. I've…never felt this way about someone before. I'm terrified that he won't want me. That he'd never choose me in the end. Why would he? I'm…not a very normal girl. I like computers and technology. I have a cluttered little desk where I build electronics by hand. I can't cook a meal to save my life. I'm not nearly as fashionable as the other girls in my class. There's so much about me that isn't normal…and it wouldn't surprise me at all if those parts of me made him reject me…'

Fuuka felt a surge of admonishment from Lucia, just like the other day.

'You think so negatively about yourself, Fuuka. Don't forget that Minato has thrown himself into danger's grasp to ensure your safety more than once.'

'B-but he's just doing that to be kind, I'm sure-'

'Didn't we discuss this the other day? I cannot see any world in which Minato expresses such a powerful desire to keep you safe that doesn't run far deeper than simple kindness. You won't be able to lay there and convince me that you sincerely believe Minato has no romantic interest in you.'

Fuuka couldn't bring herself to respond, her face flushing. But Lucia wasn't deterred.

'Then perhaps I should ask you to explain to me why he would begin waiting for you in the lounge each and every morning before your walk to school without you ever asking. Why he would invite you out to dinner alone so many times. Why he would join you in study sessions and ask you to explain your computer work to him without you ever once bringing it up yourself. Why he's perfectly happy just sitting in relaxed silence with you and only you.'

"Well…that…um…"

It was entirely lost on Fuuka that she had responded aloud.

'Don't delude yourself, my dear; Minato feels just as strongly about you as you do about him, I would guarantee it. And there is no world in which admitting your feelings to him would ever destabilize your team in the catastrophic way you described earlier. There might be an adjustment period, but you don't need to worry about that. Relationships are ever-changing. There is no reason to deprive yourself of love for the sake of others. And I'm confident in my belief that those others would support you wholeheartedly, as well.'

Fuuka simply gazed through the darkness at her ceiling, a look of wonder having stolen her face.

'Lucia…I suppose you do have a point. I believed that the other day too…I guess I still have a long way to go to change the way I think about myself, don't I?'

'You don't have to undertake the journey alone, though. I will always be with you. As will your new friends. Try trusting them more instead of doubting yourself. I believe that is the first step, Fuuka.'

She smiled at long last, a calmness descending over her again.

'Thank you. I think you're right…no, I know you're right. What would I do without your wisdom, Lucia?'

A flood of amusement filled her mind.

'Is that a self-compliment I just heard? I am you, after all.'

Fuuka giggled lightly before untangling herself from her sheets and getting comfortable at long last, relaxing into her pillow. As tiredness suddenly caught up with her and her eyes began to flutter shut, she spoke softly to her Persona once more.

'Lucia…how would I even go about confessing my feelings to Minato-kun? When do I do it? Where do I do it? How do I even begin…to bring it up? I've never done this before. I'm not sure how to go about it.'

Another surge of amusement filled her mind and body.

'I'm afraid I can't tell you the answer to that either, dear; I am you, after all.'

9/22/24