Hey guys, thank you for your patience with the severely delayed upload of this chapter! It's insanely hard trying to find time to write when I'm so busy with work and other things in life, made more complicated by the fact that this chapter ended up being way longer than expected (clocking in at 4600 words) and took several completely different turns than expected. But it's finally here and I'm glad to be back, writing and sharing my works with the world. Read on for some deep conversations and lots of feel-good moments, with a character who hasn't had much airtime with Alexei in a long time. Any guesses as to who? ;)
Gonna reply to reviews on the previous chapter, thanks so much for the love and to everyone who reviewed!
Guest: Yeah, I agree. I had originally planned for Karina to fully recover and recognize him completely but I thought that wouldn't be realistic so I instead opted for them to have a brief moment of reconciliation, to create more feels.
Guest: Thank you for checking in about the update and for your patience with this chapter! Life certainly got hectic over the last few months but I hope this chapter finds you well :)
Disclaimer: I do not own the Embassy Row series and all the characters (except for Tanner and Jordan and Alexei's Moscow friends, who are my own creations). They belong to Ally Carter. I am merely using her characters and plotline to create this fanfiction. I have no intention of profiting off the Embassy Row series in any way. This fanfiction is purely for entertainment purposes and would not exist without Ally Carter's wonderful works.
The events that happen in this fanfiction are not meant to be representative of real life. Any similarities to any real-life events or fictional works is purely coincidental and not intentional (with the exception of the original Embassy Row books by Ally Carter since this fanfiction is literally Take the Key and Lock Her Up but from Alexei's, not Grace's, perspective). The character's actions may not always reflect my own opinions or views. Based on what happens or is mentioned in this chapter (spoiler alert), I do not condone underage drinking or murder.
Content warning: moderate
This fanfiction is rated M, for explicit and suggestive themes (such as mental health and abuse), language, and violence. This chapter contains strong language, crude banter about relationships, explicit depictions of underage drinking and grief, and mentions of murder and mental health. Please read at your own discretion
Chapter Thirty-Six: Moving On
It started with Lila and Grace combing through the archives at the Society, looking for any records of Amelia's lineage. Megan supplemented that by breaking into the databases of the online ancestry companies that had popped up in recent years. Together, we managed to trace out Amelia's entire lineage and get contact information on them, again, thanks to some clever Internet work on Megan's part.
Once that was done, it was a matter of putting together the paperwork and sending it to the appropriate parties, with everyone taking on different roles. Grace put her best face forward, as the heir to the throne, by phoning everyone and explaining the situation to them. Jamie had recovered well in Mexico and had flown over here to help, often taking over the phone calls if it got too much for Grace. He was a natural with it, charming everyone with his all-American friendliness. Megan was Grace's official secretary, replying to emails and keeping track of all the contact information and paperwork in her extensive spreadsheets. Lila was our historical contact, providing information from the Society as needed. Noah, Rosie, and Jamie became our running team, printing and mailing out the paperwork and running things to and from the post office. Dominic provided us with access to a secure vault in the basement of the townhouse, to store all the signed documents. Even Tanner and Jordan contributed, by showing up when they were free to provide the playlists, comic relief, and snacks, and as a begrudging part of the running team. And Tanner's social media skills became surprisingly useful when paired with Megan's technical expertise and the Society's historical resources, to track down social media accounts for extended branches of the Adrian royal family and figure out how everyone was related.
The townhouse had become the squad's working base, where they often worked long hours, late into the night. Thus, I was unofficially in charge of keeping everyone fed and reminding them to take breaks. Ms. Chancellor stopped by once in a while, to keep a stern eye on things and remind us of diplomatic policies and procedures. This truly had become a team effort, with everyone contributing in ways that suited them best.
And now, it looked like all our hard work was paying off. The paperwork had been completed by every single person in Amelia's lineage. The funeral was tomorrow and everyone had arrived and had been settled into hotel rooms. The dress rehearsal had been earlier today. There were a few hiccups, from Grace freezing during her speech to everyone continually messing up the timing for walking out the cathedral doors. But Ms. Chancellor assured everyone that a rocky dress rehearsal meant the actual event would go well. I could only pray that would be the case, especially for something as public as a state funeral, to be broadcasted internationally for the whole world to see.
The squad had been earlier over, going through last minute checks over takeout to make sure everything was good. They had all since gone home and now, it was just Jamie and I.
"Damn, I can't believe it's all going to be over tomorrow," Jamie said, taking a brownie from the tray Lila had brought over.
"You ready?" I asked.
Jamie shrugged, taking a massive bite of the brownie. "Ready as I'll ever be." I eyed the neat pile of paperwork, all signed and dated. I was still astounded by what it meant. Sixty-three signed documents. Sixty-three lives that had been changed forever after Adria's darkest secrets came to light. Sixty-three people who would never be the same again.
I grabbed the document on the top of the pile. It was only fitting that it was Jamie's, as the rightful and direct heir to the throne.
"You sure you don't want this?" I looked over at Jamie. He glanced at the papers in my hand.
"No way, bro."
"Surely, leading a nation would be the same as commanding an army, no?" I asked wryly, flipping through Jamie's signed paperwork.
"You kidding me?" Jamie shook his head vehemently. "There's no way in hell I'd lead a nation. Not with all the politics, the B.S., and the people prostrating themselves at my feet just to get on my good side. With the army, there's just good old-fashioned respect and duty."
"Hey, doesn't seem all that different to me," I said, shrugging. Jamie just clapped my shoulder as he laughed, taking another brownie from the tray.
"That's your fourth brownie today," I commented, raising my eyebrows.
"So what, they're good," Jamie mumbled around a mouthful of chocolate.
"I swear you're only eating them because Lila brought them," I deadpanned.
"What can I say, she's a good baker." Jamie took another massive bite of his brownie.
"Are you into her?"
"What, who, me?" Jamie feigned innocence as he chewed his brownie. I wasn't going to be fooled so easily though.
"Yes, you," I deadpanned. It was hard not to miss all the glances Jamie had been sneaking at Lila over the last couple weeks.
"Nah, bro, she's so intense. Definitely not my type," Jamie said airily, avoiding my gaze as he stuffed the rest of the brownie in his mouth and grabbed another one.
"Then why the hell are you eating all of her brownies?"
"I'm putting them out of their misery." Jamie swallowed, only to shove the next piece in his mouth. "I know you sure as hell aren't going to eat them." I glared at him.
"I ate one," I retorted.
"Yeah, that was half of one and only because Tanner made you share with him," Jamie countered, polishing off the rest of that brownie piece.
"Well, some of us like to take care of our bodies." I gave him a pointed look.
"Hey, indulging once in a while is healthy," Jamie mumbled around a mouthful of brownie.
"You know, I expect better from the West Point cadet here. That you should be all for a healthy lifestyle." I elbowed him cheekily.
Jamie finished chewing, his face turning serious. "I'm actually taking the semester off West Point."
"Huh?" I wasn't sure if I had heard Jamie correctly.
"I'm taking the winter semester off too. Spending some time in Adria," Jamie repeated. I looked at him, realizing he was dead serious.
"I want to make sure Gracie is okay, after everything she's gone through. And Grandpa's not getting any younger and I want to spend some time with him." I nodded in understanding.
"Besides, while I'm here, I figure I'd look into some of the European military colleges," Jamie continued.
"None of the schools here compare to West Point and you know it," I countered.
Jamie shrugged. "Hey, if I end up staying in Europe a while, I figured I should keep my options open."
"For universities or for girls?" I asked cheekily.
Jamie shrugged again. "Just for life in general. But hey, while I'm here, might as well scope out the chicks and enjoy the change of scenery."
"Are you sure this isn't just a grand scheme to spend more time eyeing Lila?" I wiggled my eyebrows.
"Nope." Jamie glanced away from me, looking all around the room, at everywhere except me.
"Come on, when are you going to grow a pair and ask her out?" I cut to the chase, not wanting to waste any time.
Jamie shook his head vehemently. "No way. She's way out of my league. She's the kind of girl who would belong with another high-society embassy kid, all cultured and diplomatic like her. No way she'd go for a military brat like me."
I smirked, ready to call out Jamie for implicating himself. "So you admit it, you do feel something for her." His eyes widened, like a deer caught in headlights.
"What, no," he retorted.
I elbowed him cheekily. "Come on, man, it's so obvious you're into her."
"Says who?"
"Says me." I winked at him cheekily. "And the rest of the squad if they were here."
Jamie sighed, relenting. "Okay, fine, she's sorta cute."
"Sorta?" I raised an eyebrow at him.
"Geez, what do you want me to say? That she's smoking hot? That she's the most drop-dead gorgeous girl in this side of Europe?"
"That's more like it." I elbowed him playfully, winking. Jamie rolled his eyes before he clapped my shoulder.
"Let's hang out in the lounge," Jamie said. "You got any drinks?"
"Sure, there's some in the fridge. Help yourself." Jamie nodded, making his way to the fridge.
I walked over to the lounge, sitting down on the couch. Jamie walked in moments later, beer in hand. He sat down, cracking it open.
"Thank God I'm legal here," he said, taking a swig from it. He looked at me, holding the can up. "You want some?"
"Sure," I said, making a rash decision.
Jamie started to hand me the can, before stopping. "Wait, you're not legal here. Or anywhere for that matter."
"I will be in a few months. Besides, it doesn't matter. No one gives a shit in Europe anyways," I said. Jamie briefly considered this before shaking his head.
"Besides, it's my house. Hand it over," I pressed, although playfully. Jamie conceded, giving me the can. I took a large gulp, savouring in the malty taste.
"You staying the night?" I asked, taking another sip.
"Of course," Jamie replied.
"Good. Wouldn't want you wandering the streets of Adria late at night and drunk off your ass," I said, helping myself to more of Jamie's beer.
"Hey, give it back. At this rate, you're going to be more drunk than me," Jamie said, gesturing at the can.
"It's my house, I can do whatever I want." I moved like I was going to hand the can back but took another sip at the last second. Jamie reached for me, tilting the can up. I tried not to backwash into the can as beer spilt down my chin, running down my shirt.
"Yeah, but you're hogging my beer and you're not even legal. Hand it back," Jamie said. I gave him the can back, clapping him on the shoulder. He just clapped me back hard before taking a long swig.
"So, about you and Gracie." Jamie glanced at me over the top of the can.
"Let me guess, this is the part where you lecture me about how I can't hurt Grace or else you'll make me pay for it," I said, overly dramatic.
Jamie grinned. "I did have a big old lecture prepared for all of Gracie's future boyfriends. Except I never imagined it would be you. You know Gracie almost as well as I do so I won't bother with most of that crap. Besides, you should have a very good idea of what I'm capable of, should you hurt Gracie in any way."
I couldn't help but grin at how protective Jamie was of Grace. She was so lucky to have a brother like him. "Don't worry, man, I wouldn't ever dream of doing anything to harm Gracie."
"But in case you need a reminder, she comes first, and you protect her."
"As I've been doing for years."
He gave me a pointed look, taking a sip of his beer. "You failed here and there over the summer."
"Due to circumstances beyond my control," I countered smoothly. Jamie shook his head in disagreement.
"You're full of shit, you know." Jamie stared at me. "Just admit you weren't man enough to own your feelings for Grace and stand up to your father."
"Hey, it all worked out fine because both those things happened so you can calm yourself down," I said cheekily. Jamie gave me a curious look, saying nothing. It was only then that I realized the implications of what I had said. Yes, I was fine with talking about my feelings for Grace but the events with my father in the palace? That was something I didn't think I'd be comfortable sharing anytime soon.
"How far have you gotten with her?" Jamie's question pulled me out of my thoughts. Now, it was my turn to look at him curiously. Jamie suddenly stopped short, a horrified look overtaking his face, as if he just realized what had come out of his mouth. "Oh wait, never mind, don't answer that, I don't want to know."
"Relax, buddy, I haven't gone that far with her. Only making out, no sexual touching."
Jamie still made a face at that. "Only making out."
"What, you can't expect Grace and I to date and not be physically intimate. I'd expect nothing less if you were seeing someone."
"Yeah, but this is my little sister we're talking about here. I don't want to imagine the shit she's doing with you or how kinky the two of you are getting without my knowledge." For a tough army guy, it was funny how squeamish Jamie was about Grace's love life.
"To put you at ease, we haven't been getting kinky at all. And I'd never do anything without her explicit consent."
"You better not." Jamie side-eyed me.
"Of course. Gracie comes first, as you so poignantly reminded me." I raised an eyebrow at him.
Jamie rolled his eyes. "Just keep your bedroom activities to yourselves and for God's sake, use a condom. I'll take back every word I said if I find out you got my sister pregnant, especially before she finishes high school."
"Will do, bro," I replied, clapping Jamie on the back. "You can relax. She's in good hands with me."
Jamie took another sip of his beer, looking at me curiously.
"What?" His face was mildly unsettling.
"You're good for Gracie, you know," Jamie mused. "You have a grounding effect on her. And she's good for you too. She brings out this kind, nurturing, caring side of you." I looked at Jamie, bewildered.
"For real though," Jamie continued, taking another sip of his beer. "She's healed and gotten stronger. And you've lightened up a bit, buddy."
"Geez, thanks for the compliment," I deadpanned.
"I mean, you still have that stick shoved up your ass. But not as much as before," Jamie commented. Although the accompanying shrug and look on his face was casual, the playful glint in his eyes suggested otherwise. I promptly punched him in the arm, almost causing him to drop his beer. Thankfully, I was quickly forgiven as he shoved me back just as quickly and just as hard. After a few moments of good-natured roughhousing, we settled down on the couch again, laughing uncontrollably.
"Do you want to watch a movie or something?" I asked.
Jamie nodded. "Sure." He grabbed the remote, turning on the TV and scrolling through the movies on Netflix.
Jamie and I eventually settled on one of the Marvel movies. We largely watched in silence, making conversation here and there. Somehow, we ended up passing the beer can back and forth, each of us getting progressively more buzzed as the movie played. But the longer the movie went on, the quieter we became, each lost in our thoughts. When it got to one particularly action-packed fight sequence, I expected Jamie to be totally engrossed, as he usually would be. But he was staring blankly at the screen, barely focusing on the movie.
"Penny for your thoughts?" I asked tentatively, breaking the silence. Jamie's gaze snapped towards me.
"Huh?" He stared at me, completely bewildered, like I had broken him out of a deep trance.
"You totally zoned out." I playfully nudged his shoulder. "What's on your mind?"
"Oh." Jamie shook his head, glancing at the screen before looking back at me. "This fight sequence, it's reminding me of that fight between you and Spence."
"On the island?" I raised my eyebrows. Jamie merely nodded, focusing his attention back on the screen.
"Do you remember that night?" I asked tentatively, knowing I was treading into some dangerous territory of old memories.
Jamie rolled his eyes. "How could I forget? That was one hell of a night. How did you and Spence even end up fighting in the first place again?"
"Do you seriously not remember?" I deadpanned. Jamie shrugged, taking a sip of his beer.
"Um, it's because Spence kissed Grace and –" However, I didn't get a chance to finish my sentence because Jamie spat out his beer.
"Spence kissed Gracie?!" Jamie exclaimed. I nodded slowly. I thought that was common knowledge among everyone who had attended the island party but looking back, maybe it wasn't. After all, only Spence, Grace, and I had been there in the woods that night. Everyone else had been out on the beach, none the wiser as they lived it up.
"You have to be kidding me, right?" Jamie looked at me, almost desperately, as if he didn't want to believe it. However, I just shook my head as I quickly recapped the story, at least my side of it anyways. When I finished, a string of expletives flew out of Jamie's mouth before he finally shook his head in disbelief.
"How in the hell is it that my kid sister has kissed both my best friends?" Jamie muttered.
"I'm still your best friend?" I asked, almost not quite believing what I was hearing. Now, Jamie was the one looking at me skeptically.
"Duh, of course, Alexei," he stated, like he thought I was crazy.
"But what about Spence?" I asked.
Jamie shook his head. "Spence was a good guy. Kinda unhinged and a bit rogue at times but he had a good heart and was just trying to do the right thing." The gravity of what Jamie really experienced sunk in. Spence had been a mere acquaintance to me so his death didn't mean much. But Spence was more than just an acquaintance to Jamie. He was a friend, a fairly close one. I couldn't imagine what it'd be like to lose a friend, let alone a close one. I would have been devastated if I lost Jamie, Tanner, Jordan, or Roman. Yet, Jamie had shouldered that grief and that loss alone, bearing that burden in addition to all the chaos happening at that time. I felt extra guilty for not being there for Jamie, to support him through the loss of Spence. Or perhaps I had just become so jaded, thanks to all the death and trauma I had endured in the last few months, that Spence's death meant nothing to me.
"Were you and Spence close?" I asked, knowing I was treading some dangerous waters.
Jamie shrugged half-heartedly. "Close enough to be best friends." I nodded, recalling how Jamie had referred to both Spence and I as his best friends. I wondered how close Jamie and Spence had been. Definitely close enough to go on a trip together but probably not as close as him and I were. But then again, there was so much I'd never get to know about Spence now. For all I knew, Jamie could have been much closer with Spence, closer than the two of us had ever been, at one point. But that was something I'd never get to know, now that Spence was dead.
"I didn't kill him, you know," I said quietly, pushing further. Jamie looked at me for a long moment, staying so quiet I was concerned I had upset him and pushed him too far. But the response finally came, a ghost of a whisper, so quiet, I barely heard it.
"I know." I glanced over at Jamie, shocked to hear him say that.
"I wanted to believe you had killed Spence. It was what the news, my grandfather, what everyone was saying. I wanted someone to be angry at. After all, it was my fault I had brought Spence to Adria. If I hadn't, then maybe he'd still be alive." Jamie looked briefly at me, tears shining in his eyes, before he looked down at his hands.
"I wanted to blame you, Alexei. But I couldn't. As much as every part of my brain and everyone around me was telling me you did it, that it couldn't have been anyone other than you, a basal part of me, in the deepest corners of my gut, told me that you didn't do it. That there's no way you could have killed Spence because it was so unlike you." Jamie looked at me again, the tears finally spilling over.
"Because I knew, deep down, that there was no way you'd murder someone. Beat them to a pulp, hell yeah. But murder? No fucking way." I couldn't imagine how difficult these last few months had been for Jamie, not just dealing with the grief of losing Spence but this internal turmoil, of not knowing who to believe in a very high stakes situation. It made me feel like an even shittier friend, for being so wrapped up in my own problems, that I didn't stop once to think about what he was going through.
Yes, there had been a time where we had been mortal, sworn enemies. When we had been out for each other's blood. But Jamie and I had so much history and had gone through so much together, especially in the last few months. Although the recent events could have permanently driven us apart, it seems like we had gotten over that hump, that critical turning point where we were friends again and perhaps had the potential to become even closer.
"It didn't seem that way when you cornered me in the cave," I stated, thinking back to that fateful day.
"I didn't have a choice, Alexei," Jamie uttered, frustration and anger radiating off him. "What else was I to do? All the evidence was pointing towards you. I had to confirm it for myself. I had no choice but to believe, even though I didn't want to."
"So you ratted me out to Adrian police," I stated defensively, the old anger rising in my blood.
"I didn't have a fucking choice. My hands were tied. I didn't want to believe you had killed Spence but everything else suggested otherwise." Jamie glared at me, eyes blazing. "Look, man, are you trying to make me hate you again? To make me believe you had killed Spence after I put that aside and dealt with it?"
"I'm sorry." I held up my hands in surrender, looking at Jamie earnestly. "I don't want this to get out of hand. But I understand why you had to do all those things."
Jamie narrowed his eyes at me, not fully letting his guard down. "Do you actually believe that or are you just saying that to make me feel better?"
"You were put in a tough spot, maybe more so than anyone involved in that whole mess," I started. "Loyalty to your country and Spence or loyalty to your closest friend and the enemy country. Anyone in your shoes would have a hard time knowing what to believe and what's right because you'd be losing someone either way. You did your best given the circumstances."
At once, Jamie deflated, putting his head in his hands. When he finally looked up, his eyes were wet, shining with tears.
"Fuck, there was a time I thought I had lost both you and Spence. I didn't know who to believe and what to feel. Do you know how fucking awful that time was, how lonely and isolated I felt?" Jamie cried, the tears pouring freely down his cheeks.
"Yes, I do," I replied earnestly. Because I felt it too, feeling like no one believed me and that I was truly alone in this world, to fend for myself without any allies. There were times I thought I wasn't going to make it out of this alive and now, I realized Jamie had felt that way too.
"I'm sorry I wasn't there for you," I said empathically.
Jamie snorted, shaking his head. "Of course you couldn't be there for me. You were hiding from international law enforcement, for Christ's sake."
I nodded. "That's fair. Though I'm not just talking about those days, but after too." I didn't have to say the words for Jamie to know what I meant, as he looked at me heavily. The army base. The States. Mexico. Which was where I had abandoned him to come back to Europe for a wild goose chase to find Grace. Sure, we had patched things up while we had vanished off the face of the Earth, enough to build up a decent friendship again. But never did we talk about what had really happened during those tense days, not like this.
Jamie's face morphed into confusion. "You came with me, Gracie, and Dominic to the States and Mexico. You didn't have to do that, you know."
I shrugged. "It's not like I really had a choice at the time, given my fugitive status. I mean, what else was I supposed to do, continue hiding out in the Adrian palace?"
That brought a laugh out of Jamie. "You could have, just saying."
I raised an eyebrow at him curiously. "You really think I'd want to be hiding in the dark corridors of the palace, trying to dodge the princess and all her guards?" We stared at each other, dead serious, for about two seconds, before we burst into raucous laughter.
"So who really killed Spence?" Jamie looked at me curiously. Just as I started to answer, he quickly shook his head, cutting me off. "Actually, screw that. I don't want to know. It doesn't matter now. I just want to put this mess behind me." I nodded in agreement. I was ready to move on from this, leaving it in my past where it belonged and focusing on the future.
Just then, the movie ended, the credits rolling on the screen. The timing was almost ironic in a way, as Jamie and I stared at the TV bewildered, the movie long forgotten thanks to our deep conversation.
"Huh, guess that's that," Jamie stated dumbfoundedly, before yawning loudly. "What do you say, time for bed?" I nodded. Between all the hard work preparing for the funeral and the dress rehearsal today, I was exhausted.
I grabbed the remote, turning off the TV. When I stood to head up to my bedroom, I noticed Jamie looking at me intently.
"Everything okay?" I asked quietly.
"Thank you, Alexei, for always being a good friend. For always being loyal even when I wasn't. For always having my back." Jamie's eyes shone with tears at his admission as he looked at me, his face radiating nothing but true friendship. A weight I hadn't realized I had been carrying lifted off my shoulders, knowing that no matter what Jamie and I had gone through and would face together, we would always remain friends.
"Of course, Jamie, that's what friends are for." It was my turn to return the earnest look before I held up my hand. "Bros for life?"
"Bros for life," Jamie echoed wholeheartedly, as he barreled over to me, grabbing my hand for the guy hug. But when we embraced, it quickly turned into a very real hug as we held onto each other, knowing that no matter what life decided to throw our way, we'd always have each other. And through all the crazy, that was the only thing that mattered.
Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Next chapter will be up between Nov. 14 and Nov. 18.
It was nice to finally write some Jamie and Alexei scenes again, after Jamie being MIA for the majority of this story. If you enjoyed the Jamie and Alexei moments, there will be more Jamie cameos in the coming chapters! ;)
Also, I'm aware there are some slightly non-canon things in this chapter (like Grace calling everyone in Amelia's lineage, since the original books says she never met them prior to the funeral). But it made more sense with how I was writing it. This is also a heads-up that the last several chapters will have more non-canon scenes and elements. What do you think happens next (hint: it's a scene from the original books)?