At first, I stared at the man, not believing that he'd actually release us. I snatched up the Timer and nervously stepped through the doorway, Wade and the Professor creeping out behind me.

Strange must have read my facial expression. "I wouldn't recommend attempting an escape." He gestured to a hole in the floor where energy went swirling around and around.

I also noticed Wong lurking in a doorway nearby.

The moment I entered the chamber outside, all the buttons and readouts on my invention flickered back to life.

I only stared at it for a moment before Strange waved his hands and sent my invention shooting back, bullet fast, into the prison.

Wade yelped and ducked as it whizzed over her head. "You trying to kill me?"

"Only if you were a foot taller, Miss Welles," Strange joked.

I crossed my arms. "Look, uh, I guess I wouldn't mind helping your task force, but I think my friends want to go home. Not to mention Mr. Brown."

The ground shook again. The floor beneath a pagoda lantern trembled and dropped off into oblivion, taking the lantern with it. Wade jumped.

Strange looked pained. "Unfortunately, I can't do that. If I sent your Professor back to where he came from he possesses enough knowledge to develop a second device and cause more dangerous ripples through the Multiverse."

I flinched as a suit of armor crashed to the floor. "I suppose since Arturo taught me everything I know, that's fair, but what about Wade and our random motorist?"

"It will still cause unwanted interest in your quantum physics discoveries. Besides, we need a surgical solution to our problems in the Multiverse. Introducing you four to worlds you have in essence have already visited limits the spacial/temporal butterfly effect—"

"I'm in," Wade blurted, eyes filled with excitement.

I rolled my eyes. "Let me guess: It's all the magic and sorcery."

Wade got indignant. "So what if it is?"

The Professor sighed. "Although no one has yet asked for my opinion on the subject, I consent on the grounds of scientific fascination."

Rembrandt, though, kept shaking his head. "I still say I never signed up for this crap. Give me one reason why you people...and things need me here."

"I'll give you several." Strange strode up to an archway. "Right this way, gentlemen and lady."

Howard puffed his cigar, shaking his tail feathers. "If you'll excuse me, I gotta hit the head."

Strange waved him on. "We won't be needing you for awhile. You should probably brush up on your karate, though."

"Waaah." The duck waddled down a corridor to the north.

Strange shoved a box into my hands. "Here. You can have your junk back."

I stared at the contents of the box. A football, baseball, an orange. Random stuff I'd thrown into the vortex when I'd first started making experiments. I set it by the cage. "Uh, thanks, I guess."

We followed the wizard down a stone corridor lined with...artifacts.

A large aqua colored toboggan with flames painted on the side.

A watch with a tag reading `New France.' Arturo self-consciously checked his sleeve to make sure his was still on his wrist.

Photographs of a mass burial site, a note below explaining how 150 dimensional travelers spread a common cold virus to the prehistoric indigenous population and wiped them out.

A mattress.

A photograph of a fractured dinosaur skeleton at a dig site, with an incriminating shoeprint.

A glass case filled with Timers similar to my own, including very clunky prototypes. A gray one, shaped like a Star Trek phaser, had a note below it, explaining how it got left on an Egyptian world, counting down to 29 years. Strange told me it got retrieved before someone in Year 29 could make use of it.

Another glass case, this one containing diaries. Wade seemed to recognize a few of them.

A video of me demonstrating my slide Timer, but saying words I never spoke on camera.

A recording of Rembrandt on Russian court TV talking about dimensional travel. Our Rembrandt's eyes bugged out when he noticed it. "This has got to be a gag!"

The Professor squinted at a dirty black collar, poking the raised letters that read `Truth Detector.' He rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

We passed a display of pistols, rifles and assault weaponry. "Are our doubles...violent?"

"From time to time, yes. Mister Brown in particular. He is, after all, ex-military. But the equipment you see here actually got left by a different dimensional traveler. One of the kinks in the Multiverse we'll need to unravel."

Halfway down this tunnel, we passed a garage, where vehicles had been parked: A Humvee, a brown and yellow van, two identical, but flamboyant red convertibles had been parked, each with the same vanity plate: CRYNMAN.

Rembrandt gasped. "Hey! That's my car!"

He frowned, scratching his head. "Wait, how did you move it over here? And why does this other one look exactly like it?"

Strange waved dismissively. "The one on the left belongs to your double. We had to pull it out of a glacier. The second one isn't your car either. Yours is parked in the other room where you left it. There's more than one of you, Rembrandt."

The building shook. Bits of stone hit the vehicles like hailstones.

I peered through the windows of the Hummer. "I still can't believe I was able to create a portal so powerful that it could suck up an entire four wheel vehicle."

"You set off a chain reaction," Strange explained. "Similar to the atomic bomb. Your Timer only jolts the connection open, like a catalyst."

The room had several photographs and newspaper clippings covering the walls. Snapshots of markerboards covered in scientific equations related to dimensional travel. Pictures of Me, Wade, Arturo and Rembrandt doing things none of us remembered doing...especially that one where we're all naked for some reason.

We wore Soviet uniforms, flight suits, astronaut outfits, yellow and black spandex costumes with an X symbol on them.

Wade pointed to the framed back cover of her autobiography. "Hey, can I have this, or is it going to cause the universe to explode?"

Strange smiled. "You can have the whole book. In fact, I'm hoping you can use it to track down all the anomalies your doubles are making."

Rembrandt kept shaking his head and muttering something about trick photography.

Arturo chuckled at a picture of himself as an opera singer. When I showed him a picture where he wore boxing gloves, he remarked, "My boy, in my day I was quite a pugilist. I'd like to think I still am!"

Another tremor created holes in the floor. Framed pictures fell from the walls, glass shattering. Some of the ones remaining on the walls faded strangely, like Marty McFly vanishing from family photographs.

"You can look at these later if we have time. I have more pressing things I need to show you." Strange led us on down the hallway.

A wall of clothing, all suspiciously close to our own sizes, each tagged with notes about the places they'd been left. I recognized quite a few from the aforementioned photographs, but it also included cowboy duds.

Heavy fur coats.

Jackets and other clothing that appeared to be mostly eaten away by sulfuric acid.

Wade eyed the items like a department store customer. She lifted a skirt, rolling the fabric between her fingers. "Someone has a good sense of taste."

Arturo scoffed at the remark, crossing his arms as he examining the bulkier outfits. "I assume that's the point this gentleman is trying to bring to our attention."

"Yes, these are your doubles' clothes." Strange took a shirt from the wall, holding it to my chest. "XL, correct?"

I nodded.

He put it back. "Your doubles carelessly leave clothing behind. Clothing that sometimes contains foreign bacteria hazardous to immune systems never before exposed to certain diseases."

Wade toyed with a leather jacket, frowned when she noticed a jagged rip in the side. "This one doesn't seem to be my size."

"That belongs to the other traveler. At any rate, in addition to disease, there's the disruption of the various manufacturing chains, sales and distribution. On a related note..."

Strange paused next to a long wall display, set up like a murder board, charting dollar bills and where they'd been found. "Your doubles have caused innumerable problems for the FDIC and Department of Treasury on several worlds. Although not technically counterfeit, the bills do not have the correct presidents, symbols, or serial numbers on them."

The Professor narrowed his eyes at a greenback, his face indicating that he already knew where this was going.

"...It seems harmless, but it's caused ripples in just about every world's economy. People have gotten arrested, lost their jobs, had cars repossessed, missed lifesaving medical treatments..."

My eyebrows raised when I noticed my double had tipped a girl at a bar for the sum of 5K.

"...Plus the man hours law enforcement has spent pursuing nonexistent counterfeiting rings...instead of catching dangerous criminals, they've been trying to catch you. There have been deaths."

At this point, Wade seemed to be drowsing.

"I'd be interested to know how this affects the collector's market," Arturo remarked. "People pay a premium for mistakes at the Federal Reserve."

"You have no idea! Oh, and let's not forget the unauthorized ATM withdrawals. Although it may seem like a victimless crime, those bank accounts have owners."

He stabbed a finger at a pair of Superbowl tickets. "This team never made it to the playoffs, but your doubles passed them off as the real deal. In addition to all this, your dimensional twins have left behind unpaid hotel bills and bar tabs everywhere they go. You will have to make restitution, I'm afraid."

"What!" I cried. "I didn't sign up for this. I already have a job!"

"Me too!" Wade agreed.

"Doppler Computer Superstore. Hardly an essential career."

Her face flushed red. "Oh, and folding bedsheets is?"

"It's only part of your duties, Miss Welles. It will serve as cover as we resolve our many dimensional issues."

Rembrandt clenched his fists as he stared at all the strange looking money. "Excuse me, Space Wizard, what the hell does any of this have to do with me? You still haven't explained why I gotta be stuck with these three turkeys!"

"Mister Brown, your double is a notorious ATM abuser. Also, take a look at this..." Directly across from the money display, he had a copy of the United States Constitution, and in our handwriting it seemed. "Introducing your own version of Democracy into a world unfamiliar with the concept. Mister Brown, I think you of all people will appreciate the absolute irony of the last page."

I took one glance and had to laugh. "`And James Brown is the Godfather of Soul.'"

Rembrandt looked indignant. "Well he is!"

"People have spent years puzzling over the meaning of this cryptic statement. Their James Brown is actually a dead automechanic from New Jersey...t's a bit on the technical side, but, suffice to say, you, and these three turkeys have dimensional doubles that have caused a hiccup in the fabric of space and time, and we need you to help us repair the damage."

Brown just scowled at him. "Man, why should I believe anything you say? For all I know, you just used your magic and kidnapped all four of us!"

Strange looked me in the eyes. "Were you kidnapped, Mister Mallory?"

I shook my head.

Space Wizard marched closer to the man. "Rembrandt, let me ask you something: Does the name `Sharon Jackson' mean anything to you?"

Rembrandt flinched. "How do you know about her?"

Another tremor. More pieces of the floor falling away. Objects on display disappeared. Others fell to the floor.

"In a parallel universe, you're married. That woman would have been just fine, but then a double of yourself just happened to slide into their world and make the woman pregnant."

"Run that by me again? But slowly?"

"On a parallel earth, a version of you married Sharon."

"Yeah?" Brown was smirking now. "I think I like that part..."

"And you understand that there are parallel universe copies of you and these three people."

Rembrandt nodded, but didn't look like he agreed.

"Copies of those people brought Parallel Universe You to another parallel universe..."

Now Rembrandt blinked like a frog in a hailstorm, scratching his head. "So...this other me...committed adultery with my other self's wife. Is that what you're saying?"

"Exactly. And now she's pregnant."

"Wait, why is that my problem? And why would she even assume that it wasn't parallel husband's son?"

"She already has a son, and Parallel Universe Husband didn't sleep with her until he returned from the war in Australia. Plus she and half her family remembers seeing two Rembrandt Browns, so I had to perform a Memory Erasure Spell. Right now several people are getting CAT scans and being treated for Early Alzheimer's and Dementia, all thanks to your double's actions."

Rembrandt leaned on a stone wall, looking like he might faint. "What the hell do you want me to do about it? It sounds like all of that can be handled between Parties A, B and C, which has nothing at all to do with me!"

Strange put a hand on his shoulder. "The son's genotype doesn't belong in their world. It's throwing the entire Multiverse out of sync. We need someone who can get reasonably close enough to...Party B...to retrieve the baby, and take it to a special safe dimension."

Rembrandt brushed the hand away. "What! You guys kidnap me, and now I'm supposed to go kidnap someone's baby?"

"It's a little more complicated than that. I'll brief you on the specifics once we get started."

Rembrandt rubbed his forehead like he'd developed a migraine.

The Professor cleared his throat. "Do I also have...illegitimate children, out there somewhere?"

Strange looked disgusted. "No."

Wade stifled a laugh. "Wow, that was cold."

"Sowing your wild oats across the Multiverse is nothing to brag about."

Rembrandt looked eager to slap the man, but kept his hands at his sides. "I'm still not working at no damn hotel! It took hundreds of years for my people to break free from the oppression of slavery and gain equal rights as American citizens, I'm not letting some magic man wave his hands and change it all back!"

"Rembrandt, if you don't help us with this, there's a very real possibility that everything will change back. Even if the ripples don't overturn your world's history, I haven't told you about the Kromaggs yet."

The murder board fell off the wall. Strange leaned it against the stones, but didn't bother hanging it back up.

"Look, man, I've got a career! I'm a professional singer!"

"Actually, Rembrandt, you're not. Your career isn't that earth shattering. Last time I studied your files, your album sales were flagging."

"Yeah? Then why did they invite me to sing the National Anthem at the Giants game?"

"Even a mediocre musician can perform at a baseball stadium."

"You trying to piss me off? Because it's working!"

Strange only shook his head, motioning us to a bend in the tunnel where another television had been set up. "Oh. Quinn. You'll definitely want to see this." He snapped his fingers and the TV switched on, displaying a recording of myself on some talk show called Lipschitz Live.

I stared in astonishment as I saw...myself...telling the host (Liptschitz) things I never said, about the Electromagnetic Spectrum, Spacial Flux and Wormholes.

A man in a silver costume sat in a chair opposite. Some guy named Arnold Potts, a so-called `Pan Galactic Astral Traveler.' "You can't travel through dimensions in a sweater vest!" he told Other Me.

My double explained it wasn't necessary, adding some more scientific details.

The audience seemed bored, so my double added, "Did I mention that I met a female version of myself?"

"Did you have sex with her?" the host asked. That really got the audience going.

Once Mr. Lipschitz silenced them, he posed a question: "What happens if you break a leg?" After which he lectured my double about exploiting an already overburdened social welfare system.

Strange shrugged, nonverbally asking me the same question.

"What if you take a high paying job?" Lipschitz asked. "Are you not taking the bread out of the mouths of hard working American citizens?"

The wizard nodded, shaking his finger at the screen like he agreed completely.

He waved his hand, magically fast forwarding the video. "Here's where it gets really good."

It seemed I had "Moved an entire population from one dimension to another." Both the host and the silver suited man agreed that my double had violated the Prime Directive.

When my double argued that he had no Prime Directive, that he was just winging it, Strange shut off the TV. "Unfortunately, there is a Prime Directive. Actions in the Multiverse always have consequences."

I reluctantly agreed. "Wait, who are Colin and Maggie?"

Strange shook his head. "Not important. You'll find out soon enough anyway."

The corridor opened up into a large chamber decorated with all kinds of magical paraphernalia. Wade's eyes got really big as she took everything in. Kid in a candy store.

Glowing crystals, totems, amulets, magic wands, wizard staffs, burning bowls full of incense and unidentifiable substances, sidereal clocks, astrological charts, creepy statues, a sarcophagus...and a large mutant bonsai thing that looked like a person.

A plaque beneath the latter read `GROOT.' It looked so lifelike, I thought it would step out of the pot it had been been planted in.

"What's all this?" I asked.

The Professor scoffed at all the occult trappings. "The abode of a modern day witch doctor. Pseudoscientific rubbish." He walked up to the `GROOT' and shuddered. "What a horrendous plant!"

Strange stepped over to admire it. "In a different world, that plant would take offense at your comment."

Arturo responded with a derisive snort.

As if a talking duck didn't stretch credibility enough, a female satyr suddenly entered the room through a swirling vortex.

Human upper torso, well, except for the horns. Blonde, teenaged, clad in a high slit Cheongsam dress, furry hooved legs and pointy tail exposed. "Strange. We have a situation."

Strange gestured to the holes in the floor. "Is it in any way related to this? If so, I'm keenly aware of the cause..."

The satyr shook her head. "It's Alan Rickman. He's teamed up with Belasco."

The wizard swore.

Rembrandt jumped back. "Damn, man! You got a devil woman on the team? Count me out!"

"She's not a devil woman," Strange said.

"Succubus, whatever, that's it! I'm out!"

"Magik isn't either, Mister Brown."

The goat woman chanted something and her appearance changed to that of a regular teenager, clad in a black and yellow spandex costume.

"This is Illyana, member of the New Mutants."

The girl rolled her eyes. "Charmed."

Rembrandt furrowed his brow. "What's the New Mutants?"

"A team of superheroes. Not important." Strange waved his hands, and another swirling portal appeared in the air before us. "I think I've lectured you enough. Let's go visit one of the worlds your doubles have ruined."