"Welcome back to Senate Eye," Marko Biks said, smiling into the holocameras. "I'm Marko Biks, bringing you the latest in breaking news and stories. In the wake of the shake-up caused by the young queen of Naboo on her whirlwind visit to the capital, the question on everyone's lips is: who will be the next Supreme Chancellor?"

Biks sat back in his chair, and holograms of all the contenders appeared. "As things currently stand, Sheev Palpatine from that very same planet of Naboo is the current favourite. With a long career as representative of his homeworld behind him, Palpatine is free of scandal and has good support among the polls… but how much of that is true? Senate Eye has an exclusive."

The Zygerrian tapped his muzzle, then turned his chair, and the cameras zoomed out to show his guest. "Thank you for coming on with us."

"It's the least I could do," the woman replied. "I felt like the Galaxy deserved to know."

"Well, don't keep everyone in suspense," Biks told her. "Let's hear it!"

"All right," the woman replied, and squared her shoulders slightly.

She faced the camera. "My name is Rey, and – I had a difficult childhood. I was abandoned at the age of six by my parents on a world in the Inner Rim. I don't know why for sure, but – well, they never came back, and I was always told that I was sold off for drinking money."

Biks winced. "That's terrible," he said, shaking his head. "To sell a child like that… I may be Zygerrian but I know some practices should be left firmly in the compactor of history."

Rey nodded, swallowing slightly. "Thank you, Biks."

The host turned back to the holocameras himself. "A sad story, I know – but I'm sure our viewers are wondering why it's relevant to Senate Eye! And I can reveal the exclusive details… because our support department did a genetic test, and Rey is none other than the daughter of Sheev Palpatine!"

"This isn't about me," Rey spoke up. "It's about making sure that the galaxy knows the kind of person who might become their next Supreme Chancellor."

"This is obvious nonsense," Palpatine muttered, turning the holonet display off with an irritable button press, and looked at one of his closest allies. "Can't we destroy that stupid program for this?"

"That would be difficult, Senator," the aide said. "Because… well… they've provided evidence. To the courts, in a filing made just before the broadcast."

Palpatine's expression changed. "What? What kind of evidence?"

"Genetic tests and polygraphic examination," the aide said. "The examination was very limited, you know how they are, it's a demanding process-"

"I don't give a damn about the polygraphic examination!" Palpatine snapped. "I have no daughter!"

"The genetic evidence disagrees, Senator," the aide replied. "It's an exact match – chromosome patterns that would only be possible for someone who was your biological daughter, and there's no sign of forced-growth in her epigenome either."

Palpatine's eye twitched.

"That's why they felt able to make the broadcast, I'd guess," another one of his allies suggested. "Even if we did somehow manage to prove them wrong, that would take months, and they couldn't even be penalized for it because they have all the evidence required to show why they said it – they were making a claim that they had a good-faith reason to believe was true."

"Then find some other way to silence them!" Palpatine insisted. "This is going to ruin my chances for election!"

It was going to ruin his chances of ever becoming Supreme Chancellor. It would probably ruin his chances of being re-elected as Senator for Naboo, for that matter.

The Sith plan was destroyed, by a talk show.

And he couldn't even work out how it could possibly have been done. Or why.

AN:

Rey ended up in the past and decided to ruin her grandfather's plans in the funniest way she could think of.