Chapter 15: Humanity

(Hello everyone. I'm still alive, barely, as I continue trying to gain my next opportunity. I'm still trying to be positive and optimistic. Thank you all for the reviews and kind wishes. It really helped me internally.)

{Rui's Point of View}

After leaving Sots, Aura was waiting for me in the Estate's courtyard. She looked happy, despite being berated or maybe she's on a high from her fight with Silvia? I decided not to ask, instead I hugged her tightly and smiled. When she pulled back, she waved at Abaddon. He bowed slightly, smiling at her. I turned to leave, pulling her wrist gently only to feel her tug back. I looked at her confused and saw her gesture towards the estate. I raised a brow in confusion. She whispered, "Margrev needs to speak to you alone." I sighed, "Great... wonderful..." Abaddon let me go alone as he talked with Aura. As I walked down the halls, I couldn't suppress the unease I still carried in my soul. This place... it will never truly feel like home. Even if I want to be a Gardevian, it just won't happen. There's too much pain here. Margrev waited for me in her main hall. The room is quite large with a large fountain in the center, a place of meditation for her. I've been in here a few times, mostly because of Silvia. There were a few times I was allowed to meditate here; I never knew why but at the time I appreciated it. The fountain, water and peace were tranquil. The pool is deep enough to reach the torso of many. I realized how good it felt to sink under the surface here... and that became a habit whenever I needed to self-reflect or feel better. It's strange, like life is somehow drowning yet slipping beneath the surface I can finally breath.

Margrev beckoned me to approach her as she meditated by the fountain. I did and sat next to her. I stared at the fountain wondering how things changed so much in the last year. Even so, I can't help but feel as though nothing really has. Margrev finally spoke, "Your job is expressing concern over your absences." I sighed in relief, "Oh thank Arceus, this is about work." Margrev chuckled, "Not entirely, I just wanted to start off with something different." I shrugged, "Are they firing me?" Margrev shook her head, "No. They just wish you'd work more." I did feel bad, "I try not to make them pay me more than they should." Margrev shook her head, "It's fine. I told them we'd supplement your income to make up for you being on call so much. Technically they'll only be paying half your salary." I said, "Thank you." Margrev sighed sadly, "It wasn't my decision. Silvia asked me to do this." I felt a chill for a moment, "Why?" Margrev opened her eyes and laid on her back, "She still thinks she can get you back. As fucked up as it sounds, I think her obsession has turned into an unhealthy form of love." I looked down angrily, "She doesn't." Margrev stared at the ceiling, "She does. We're able to tell what others are feeling. No matter what Rui. You know this. It's love... a very, very dark love. I worry for her... I worry for my granddaughter. I worry for the future." I noticed she look uncomfortable. I've never seen her like this. I said, "You're worried? That doesn't sound like you." She sat up and grabbed my shoulders, "Listen to me. No dumb remarks, no jokes, none of that. When I told your father what I planned for you, he begged me to not let you die. I initially lied to him, promising your safety despite knowing my plan for you was to let you die. My daughter has no patience, and I knew there was a chance she'd kill you. She didn't. I thought it was a waste to care about you... but as time went on, I realized you are special. Seeing you play and help the young ones pass the time showed that. Your love for Aura showed that. Your will showed that. My son never came home. I want to believe that didn't matter to me, but it does. I know he is still out there. Chrono is still alive. My precious boy. After seeing how you could change the minds of others, I too changed. I can see you as a son and I did. That's why I gave you a way out. It wasn't perfect but I did what was necessary to make no one question me." She wrapped her arms around me, "I'm very proud of you. It pains me to say, but I won't be here to protect you forever. I can feel it. My time is diming... and there's no telling who will be the one to take my place and kill me. It could be Silvia, it could you Aura, it could even be you... but it doesn't matter. Before all that, I just want you to know... you're my son too." I didn't really know how to respond to this. I found myself laughing a bit, "Come on, you don't mean that. No one is going to kill you. They're too scared or respect you too much to do so."

Margrev pulled back and sighed, "I wish I was but I'm not. I can feel it, the dread, the worry... it's festering in my heart. I've even begun seeing the one I loved appear where he used to spend his time. Usually that's a sign..." I raised a brow in confusion, "Seeing someone you miss is a sign of impending doom? Isn't that a bit farfetched? Don't you just miss them?" Margrev shook her head, "I spend every day not regretting what I did and do to be where I am. I am a being of sacrifices and compromises. I spend my life making sure some suffer for others to be happy. Lately I've been doing more good than bad though. I wouldn't be surprised if Arceus himself killed me at some point for betrayal." I decided to ask, "What was he like? Silvia's father?" Margrev opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. To my surprise she looked down with a deep blush and I saw memories reflecting in her eyes before she closed them and sighed, "He was... special." She clenched her hands, "Very... special..." She glared at the ground in front of her, "The only bastard to have beaten me in my own game..." I stared at her, comparing her as I saw her and the way she is now. Two completely different people. In fact, this may be the only chance I get to learn about him, "So, did he beat you in a psychic battle or something?" Margrev started laughing, "Of course not, I used to make a game of it to get males to chase after me. Of course, I'd beat the crap out of them when they tried. My mother instilled this idea that I'm too good for a weak mate... then I met him... and he courted me somehow... something so rare... it could be akin to a shiny in the old days." I decided to make a joke, "Oh, so you felt him courting you was so dishonorable you threw him off a cliff?" To my surprise she shook her head, "He's not dead. Even Silvia doesn't know her dad is alive. He's at my beach home disguised as a butler. I visit it four times a year for leisure." I felt my jaw drop, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, what the fuck!? Are you serious!?" Margrev nodded, "Yep." I felt a mix of disappointment and anger, "Why the fuck did you do that?" Margrev smirked, "Those in power always find ways to bend the rules." I thought back to her dress, "Wait... then who's skin did you use to make the dress?" Margrev chuckled, "I never made one. The one I have, I bought from Aura's Mother. In exchange, she came here at a young age." At the mention of her mother, I had to ask, "What is she like?" Margrev scratcher her chin in thought, "Crescent is... strange. She's one of the oldest Gardevian spirits left. She'd purposefully get her females to mate with humans, have the child, raise the child to adulthood and then shift her soul into the new body gifting herself more power. It's a bit strange how she decided to have her own child with a body that isn't really hers with a human she kept around. He was quiet and I suspect he actually can't speak, like a farm human." I thought about it and realized Aura never really talked about her parents. Margrev stretched and said, "Well, that's all for now when it comes to my secrets. I think I need to spill one of yours. Have you ever noticed you can fight Pokémon pretty well?" I nodded, "Yeah, because of my training and the blessing." Margrev snickered, "Training? You need more than just training and you have it." She poked my chest where my heart would be, "You have Gardevian blood remember? That means your muscles and reaction times are faster than a normal pure human. I heard about the Inteleon, do you really think a pure human could train enough to react to a Snipe Shot?" I scratched the back of my neck in embarrassment, "I mean... no... I never thought it'd be possible. I thought I was lucky or because I had a good idea on what he'd do, it'd be easy to predict." Margrev shook her head, "It's delusion to even think that's possible... but I can understand why you would. You didn't even know your ancestry. The world sees you as a human, but you are a Gardevian here now." I said, "Wait, there is one more question I have. You know her father is alive, you actively lied and pretended he was dead. You also tell me you see him in places he used to spend time. I don't understand if you are still lying to me or not. There's far too much conflicting information here." Margrev stayed silent, listening to my question while lost in thought. She sighed, "It's not entirely a lie about that. Internally I wish he were here every day with me... but I can't act like that in a society that favors strength, determination and willpower. If this ever got out, it could ruin my entire hierarchy. It might even make the other leaders try to kill me themselves despite not being Gardevian. It's... dangerous." To our surprise we heard Silvia's voice, "You fucking bitch."

We both turned to see a visibly fuming Silvia, "My dad... was alive... this whole FUCKING TIME!?" I glanced at Margrev's face to see a look of despair plastered on her face, "How much did you hear?" Silvia started hyperventilating, "All these lies... Years of training... everything about me..." She broke down into sobs, "Everything was a fucking lie! YOU DID ALL THIS TO ME! My entire life..." Silvia fell to her knees crying. Margrev stood her ground, not daring to go near Silvia. I could sense dark intentions running through Margrev's mind. I found myself wondering if she'll kill Silvia. The thought crossing my mind did not bring happiness as it did before, I found myself feeling uneasy about it. Silvia asked, "Is... is that why you told me to do all those things years ago? You sabotaged my chance to be with Rui?" Margrev scoffed at that, "If I ever wanted that, I'd have never made him yours to begin with. That is still your failure." Silvia stopped crying and screamed, "My failure!? You lied to me, to everyone! You said it was worth it to sacrifice my dad to be a leader! Why would you lie to me? Your daughter. When I was young, I wanted nothing more than to meet my dad. To hear his voice. To know if he loved me or not." Margrev cut her off, "Of course he did!" Silvia shook her head, "You never gave either of us the chance to experience it in person. Why would you do that mom." Silvia tears reappeared, dripping down and off her chin with a defeated look, "Why couldn't you trust me with the secret? I just... hic... wanted to meet my dad..." When I looked back at Margrev, I could tell she was about to try and kill her. I thought about Alivia for a moment and felt bad for her, not Silvia. I placed my hand gently on Margrev's shoulder, "Don't think like that. She deserves to meet her dad. At least for closure. Besides, it wouldn't be fair for Alivia to have to lose her mom too." Margrev looked between us, contemplating whether if it was wise to listen to my words or act as she is expected. To my surprise, she conceded and said, "Alright." With the conversation at hand, I felt there is no need for me to stay. I walked by Silvia, seeing her glance at me, watching me leave and for just a moment, I felt gratitude radiating off of her. I didn't look back, I just kept walking... like she didn't even exist to me.

- Later That Day -

Abaddon and I hung out for most of the day. Aura didn't feel very comfortable near him, so she stayed at my apartment to relax after our day. We ate at a decent restaurant, worked out at a gym just so he could beat some asshole who wouldn't stop bragging and he showed me his place of existence. It's... surprisingly nice. He said it's to help him relax when he's not doing anything. "No point in working 24/7 am I right?" He said with a laugh. I'm glad he isn't crashing at my place. Not because I don't trust him... Frankly, I know how Aura is going to be. She's not going to let him stand in the way of what's hers. Now that I'm back home, Abaddon retreated to his domain while I spent some time with my mate. As I sat at the foot of the bed, she stared at my back. I could feel her gaze and a pang of regret shared between us. She said to me, "You know Scars can be healed right?" I nodded, "Yeah..." We stayed quiet for a bit, probably because she needed to muster up the courage to suggest, "I could heal them... make them fade away forever." I shook my head no and sadly smiled at her, "There's no need. I prefer it this way. Plus, don't female Pokémon like seeing humans' scars?" She gasped lightly, tearing up and looking down at our sheets in guilt. I realized I went too far and quickly went to console her, holding her tightly and kissing her head until she hugged me back. She sniffled bitterly, "Even after everything, you still just think I'm-" I silenced her with a kiss, telling her no. She's not just a Pokémon to me. She's done nothing but be the person I've loved for my entire life. She never hurt me. Yet... why do I keep hurting her? When she calmed down, she aggressively pinned me down. I let her do it, it wasn't uncomfortable. She stared into my eyes, looking into my mind momentarily before sitting on my crotch sadly, "If I ever were to have one regret... I think it's knowing the truth about us. You love me. I have you. Yet... I know... if your dad was able to pull through, you'd have been with a human girl and left me behind." She started crying into her hands, "I know you can't change the past, but it still hurts me because I know the truth. In a horribly fucked up way I got you only because they stole that option from you. I got the person I loved because they tortured you..." I tried to move my arms, but she used psychic to keep them pinned, "Aura. Please. Don't cry babe. I hate seeing you cry. I won't lie to you, there's some truth in that but you need to remember something. I want to be with you for the rest of our lives. I love you. I don't want what my younger self wanted anymore. I want to be with you and only you." She calmed down after listening to that. I held her as we slept that night. There wasn't any love making but there doesn't need to be. She's going to be on a tour again, a much stricter one ending with her visit to Dialga. I'll be alone here again, and I'll have to do some work. I don't think any missions will be done for a few weeks.

- Three Days Later -

I went to work, finding Aura's spy working with me again. She smiled and greeted me well. She initially tried to push her luck but when I sliced her cheek, that quickly changed. She backed off, realizing I'm no longer the person she once messed with. She said, "Aura talked to me recently, she's worried about you. She's starting to think Silvia scarred your mind so badly you only settled with being her mate. That you only like her because you think no one else will." I shook my head, "No. I've liked her for a long time. While it is true I wanted to be with one of my kind when I was younger, that sentiment is dead and gone. I love her because she always loved me. She was always there for me. Always cared about me and we have a lot of history. If I was able to face my fears more head on, I would have asked to be her mate before any of that happened. I don't think that was in the cards though, Margrev had her own intentions for me, and I'll never truly understand why. Whether it was my genes, my future or maybe because I'm an okay person despite being a fuck up." She asked, "Why are you a fuck up?" I turned away from her, "I'm not sure I can call myself anything else. Am I human? Gardevian? Are those really me or just labels. Affiliations. What am I? Am I truly mad at the torment anymore or am I mad Silvia cheated on me moreso than the torment? In truth I think the cheating is what really pisses me off because I was forcibly stuck to her, yet she gets to fuck around. What good was I really to anyone?" She looked nervous, "Wait, did you not know about the hypnotism nights?" This is a first I've heard of them, "The fuck is that?" She backpedaled, "I'm not going to tell you. That response already lets me know I fucked up." I got mad, "What the fuck? Why the hell would you even bring it up then!?" She conceded, "I'm sorry. Just... forget I said anything. It'll only cause more scars." I sat at my work desk, "Fine. For now. If it continues to bother me, I will ask again, and you better respond when I do. Let's just get some Arceus damn work done."

I got home at night and decided to relax in my room after working all day. I felt so pissed off being teased with information like that. She knew exactly what she was doing. I just don't understand why she tries to push my buttons. Suicide wish maybe? I should look into her past and dig up what the fuck makes her tick. Suddenly my phone rang with an unknown number. Abaddon was out so I decided to ignore it initially, but they called again. I grabbed it and answered, "Hello?" I heard a familiar voice, "Rui?" I replied, "Yes. Who's this?" He sighed, "It's Jay..." I felt a mix of anger and sadness, "Jay? It's been eight years man!" He sounded nervous, "Yeah..." I asked him, "How'd you get my number?" He said, "My mom reached out to yours. I don't know how, but she did. Took a few months, but eventually I got your number." I felt like the room was spinning and had to sit on the bed to keep myself leveled, "Oh... shit. Why'd you want to call me though?" Our last interaction ended with us fighting and him saying he hated me. Why would he reach out like this? Jay stayed silent before muttering, "I'm dying."

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