DISCLAIMER

The following is a fan-based

FICTION

Bishoujo Sailor Moon + Other series in this story are not owned by me.

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Intermission: Siblings (2)

P.S. I now have a discord server! Discord .gg/ceBMM2Zz6c

It was night and Usagi was glad that there was no scary monster encounter that pulled her out of bed.

While it was indeed an uncommon circumstance, her usual sleeping pattern (even though slightly improved to what it used to be before she became Sailor Moon) wasn't just enough to handle having little sleeping hours. And the unease of being 24/7 on alert for trouble meant that she wasn't always sure of when it was a good time to rest.

Which in turn made her incredibly wary of falling asleep for long hours.

Opening her eyes and glaring at the alarm clock saying it was '1:03', Usagi grumbled at the unfairness of her current life. She wanted to be just a normal girl at times. She was fine with having bad grades, to be ridiculed by some nerds and... also to be belittled by her parents over her antics.

The reason she missed that bag of unpleasant things is that she missed how 'normal' it all felt. How normal it was to be a bit of a failure at academics because of her own mistakes. How normal it was for her to have the right amount of time to divide between having fun with friends, do homeworks, read mangas, and... spend time with her family.

How long has it been since she had helped her mom by the stoves?

While it was true that Usagi was a complete klutz when in charge of a kitchen, that didn't make her any less reliable as a 'minion' for her mother. The woman was always so overworked between house chores and a few efforts she went through to help some of her friends, so it felt dutiful for the blonde to help in the chores when possible.

But now?

Between training, spending time with the other scouts, going for school and so on... Usagi was barely able to really keep up with what little resemblance to her old life she had before becoming Sailor Moon. Maybe it was the cold of the night giving her this 'bad feeling' that made her consider quit.

After all, what was the price here if there were others that could do it? The burden was indeed something she could carry on her shoulders, but even then her mind was a bit strained between trying to be better than normal and be better than what she was now.

It felt sudden, abrupt and disgusting to some extent. It made her sick in the stomach, cold in the feet, hot in the head and... she was off the bed.

Fixing herself a robe to put over her pjs, socks to warm her toes and a desire to drink some water and check the house at night, Usagi went to do just that. She expected to be the only one awake, especially since her parents were bound to wake up early in the morning to either go to work or start the business at the kitchen, but as Usagi stepped out of her room... she paused at the sight of 'light' coming from the living room.

It wasn't the one that would be on during nighttime for dinner, no it was the TV. Curiosity made her forget her urge for water, blue eyes aimed at the living room as she approached it and she offered surprise at the sight of her brother lying by the couch and seemingly having a similar case of 'losing sleep'.

It was a surprise for sure, but one that she felt a welcoming one considering that she wouldn't mind someone like Shingo to be awake to keep her some company right now.

"Can I sit here?"

Her question almost made the boy jump in surprise, and Usagi had to bit down a smile at the amusing sight as she remembered this wasn't just a prank.

"...Sure. Nightmares?"

"Can't sleep," She replied curtly as she slumped on the couch and used Shingo's blanket to cover her legs. "It's not nightmares, just... anxiety."

"For what?"

Biting her tongue and reminding herself that Shingo wasn't aware of her secret identity, Usagi focused her tired mind to avoid anything worrisome.

"Well... me and some of my friends are doing a bit of... volunteer work."

The boy appeared surprised. "Really? Thought you would have told it to mom and dad."

"It's not a regular thing. So I don't want them to worry and... it is quite tiring for me."

He nodded. "It should be. You have school."

"Which is... which is why it feels quite cumbersome at times. Like, to want to get up and deal with that."

"Well, it's kind of a job and, from my understanding, you're not getting exactly paid so... it's sure feel like it is a big burden."

"Yeah-"

"And you feel bad about thinking of giving up?" Shingo asked, eyes tired but grasping her current dilemma. "How is it like, exactly?

"I just... I just feel like this keeps on returning," Usagi blurted out, looking down to her hands. "Over and over again- it's not just a matter of being ready, but for me to want to be ready for it. To go the extra step, it always felt so sluggish."

"Like last time?" He asked, but Usagi shook her head and that made him look perplexed. "What's different?"

"I know I can do it. I know that I can make the effort to make this work but... but I feel like this is not what I should be doing."

Shingo offered confusion. "I thought you said that helped others."

"Y-Yes but... but it's not about that. I just- I just don't feel happy to be at ready all the time."

...

"It happens."

...

"What?"

"You're just going through a rather difficult phase, Usagi. It's going to keep popping up."

"...And?"

"And it will pass with time," Shingo assured, his tone with the kind of confidence that only someone that knew that feeling could provide with those words. "You'll feel like you need to make a decision that could curse the world, yourself and those around between a mere 'yes and no', but there's something that you are forgetting."

"Th-That is?"

"Do you think we will just give up on you if you don't feel you can't do it?" Her brother asking kindly. "Do you think that your decision to stop because you can't do it will make you look a coward or a bad person? Usagi, despite what many will tell you, you are still a human being. A girl that has yet to finish high school, to be put through some of the worst hurdles of adulthood and, most important of all, a girl that still lives with her family. Deciding against continuing doing something monumental, no matter how important it is, will not make you any less of that. You have limits, you have your own standards and you understand that you can't go on eternally over a 'stalemate' that keeps on gnawing at your mind."

"S-So, I should just keep on going for it? Or not?"

"Either path you take, you need to understand that we will be behind you, sister," Shingo confirmed with a supportive tone. "But if it is something that you still wish to pursue and you feel nonetheless crushed by the pacing then... couldn't you just control that?"

"...What?"

"Control the pace. Be in charge of the timing- since it's a volunteer thing and the way you spelled it means you don't have truly someone in charge to dictate your own schedule, then talk with your friends and think of a way to better handle the pace. Be in charge of something you like to do in the name of good, or just quit if you are truly that miserable."

Shingo's words rang a strange logic that gripped at Usagi's own thoughts with a surprisingly strong squeeze. Not much with the tone, but the idea that he was bringing to her that, albeit mostly unworkable with her being Sailor Moon, it could be morphed to 'work' with it.

The pace- the fact they were merely reacting to attacks from the Dark Kingdom... what if they could be the one hurling an attack and be done with it?

While it wouldn't make much sense had it been just her, Ami and Rei, with Makoto and the chance of finding one or two more allies meant that they could have the numbers to pull this through. She would have to discuss this with Luna, but the thought gnawed at Usagi as it meant one thing- less trouble, less despair and, if things went as well as she hoped for, things would be easier to manage once the Dark Kingdom was wrecked.

A little smile crept on her face and Shingo nodded before shifting his eyes back to the TV's screen.

"Better?"

Her heart skipped a beat, but it was less than a 'intense one' as usual, and more of a 'conceding' beat to the growing care she held for her brother.

"Yup."

Time will have to bend to her for the sake of her sanity, her freedom and those that the other girls were offering too just like she was.

AN

Thus Usagi becomes proactive in screwing with the plot, may result in her actually do something right that... will land her in a longer peace. Maybe.