During her time in Hamilton, Elizabeth rarely had a chance to cook meals. Her parents employed staff to take care of cooking and cleaning, so it wasn't a necessity like it was in Hope Valley. Between long hours at the all-girls school teaching, helping take care of her parents, and parenting Jack, she barely had time for much else; but she was getting the hang of things again since being back. A whole chicken and vegetables were roasting in the oven while she prepared a light salad and whole wheat rolls. Rosemary had brought over an apple pie for dessert, asking for a full report the next day.
Still reeling from all that had transpired at the pond, Elizabeth was even more determined to make sure this dinner went smoothly. After Nathan fell apart in her arms, exhaustion took over his body and she helped give him support back home to rest. He hadn't spoken another word and barely rasped a quick "Thank you," before going inside. Elizabeth was unsure what it all meant for a future relationship between them, but she was grateful he was able to open up to her and hoped it would help in his healing.
Once dinner was mostly prepared, she went upstairs to get ready and to ask Jack for help setting the table. Seeing his door ajar, Elizabeth observed her son on his bed reading one of the many books he had checked out from the library. Always grateful to have a child who loved learning as much as she did, it also worried her how little of a social life he had experienced during most of his growing up years. He attended an all-boys school, so being mixed with girls and children of many ages would be an adjustment.
Knocking lightly to get Jack's attention, Elizabeth pushed the door open further and stepped in the room as he sat up. "Would you mind going down and setting the table while I get changed?" she asked. "I'll be down to help you finish up shortly."
"Yes, Mom," was Jack's response, setting his book on the nightstand and leaving the room. Partway down the stairs, he turned around like he had forgotten something. "You never did tell me how things went on your walk with Mr. Grant. You were quiet when you got back home, and it looked like you had been crying. I hope my encouragement for you to go didn't cause a problem."
Elizabeth was impressed he had noticed how she was feeling, when she had tried to hide her emotions from him; but then she remembered he had gotten his father's instincts. "Nathan is just working through the pain from his accident and having to quit the Mounties, so I was just trying to help him. It did make me a little sad, but I am grateful you encouraged me to go on that walk with him, Jack."
Jack nodded, as his mind tried to grasp what his mother told him. "Do you think you'll ever fall in love and get married again? I think Dad would have wanted that for you, and I don't want you to be alone once I leave home."
A little stunned by his statement, Elizabeth felt slightly uncomfortable discussing her love life with her son. "I've never been opposed to getting married again; in fact, I wanted to give you a father and siblings. I'm sorry, Jack. Life just kind of got in the way, and in Hamilton there was never a man I was interested in enough to have a serious relationship with."
Jack walked back up and hugged his mom. "I just want you to be happy. You've sacrificed a lot for me, and also Grandma and Grandpa before they died. You deserve to have someone who takes care of you for a change."
Tears glistened in Elizabeth's eyes, and gratitude filled her heart that her husband Jack had given her the precious gift of a son who was loving and loyal to her. "Our guests will be here very soon, so I better get changed. I love you, my handsome boy."
"I'll have the table set in no time," he promised, bounding down the stairs like a little boy.
In her room, Elizabeth went through her wardrobe and just couldn't settle on what to wear. She tried to tell herself she wasn't dressing to impress Nathan, but part of her wanted to feel attractive and noticed by a man again. She finally found a sky-blue floral dress she had bought right before leaving Hamilton, that made her feel pretty. She fixed her hair with the sides pinned up, but most of her soft curls flowed down her back the way she knew Nathan had always liked it before. Come on, Elizabeth, she chided herself. You aren't some lovestruck teenager. Just a middle-aged woman who happened to reconnect with an old flame...well, maybe just a friend. Last of all, she touched up her lipstick and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She wasn't the energetic 30 something she had been when she left this town. Although she still looked young, she felt tired from the years of turmoil and heartache.
When she got downstairs, Jack had finished with the dishes and was placing some wildflowers he had gathered outside in a vase to go in the middle of the table. "That is the perfect touch, Jack. Thank you." Elizabeth donned an apron, then pulled the chicken and vegetables out of the oven. She put the raised rolls in to bake with just enough time before their company arrived.
Nathan woke up from a long nap, trying to make sense of his breakdown with Elizabeth that morning. His tea and baths helped with the physical pain each day; but opening up and sharing his harrowing experience with Rowdy had lightened his load mentally and allowed him to sleep without nightmares for the first time since the accident. A light rap at the door drew him out of his thoughts. He sat up, rubbing his leg to help the stiffness before trying to stand. "Allie? Is that you?" he called.
Poking her head in the door, Allie looked relieved to see Nathan awake and moving. "You've been asleep for hours. I was beginning to worry about you, but I'm glad you are getting rest. We only have 30 minutes until dinner at Mrs. Thornton's house, so you better get changed and comb your hair."
Out of habit, Nathan ran his fingers through his hair to try and tame the unruly locks. "Where's Robert and Sarah?"
Trying to keep a straight face, Allie smirked. "Sarah talked her big brother into taking her into town to get her hair done and buy something new at the dress shop. I think she wanted me to go, but the baby kept me up most of the night and I took a nap instead. They should be back any minute. You get changed, and I'll go upstairs to do the same. I'm glad you are ok...I mean, you are, aren't you? Something was off when you got back from your walk, but I didn't want to pry."
"You, not wanting to pry?" he teased. "That doesn't sound like you. I'm still processing what happened, but I promise when I feel like talking about it I'll let you know."
Biting her lip to keep from pressing the issue, Allie decided to just let him be and walked away. While she was changing into a loose dress that would actually fit her expanding belly, she heard her husband and sister-in-law come in from their errands in town. Allie heard Robert's steps coming up the stairs, and he appeared in their bedroom as she brushed her hair and pinned it up to keep cool in the summer heat.
"Sorry we took so long," he apologized, moving across the room to kiss his wife. "Is your dad ready to go? I think Sarah is going to change into her new dress, and then we can all walk next door together."
Allie held her husband's hand and drug him out of the room. "Dad should be just about ready to go. I'm glad he got some good sleep, but something definitely happened on that walk with Mrs. Thornton this morning. We need to get to the bottom of this."
"We?" he quipped. "I don't want any part of whatever this scheme is that you have concocted. Let's let him and Mrs. Thornton do their thing. I know you still have high hopes of something more between them, but that will be even less of a possibility if you try to intervene."
Scowling, Allie admitted defeat. "Oh, all right. A girl can always dream that her Dad finds happiness in life though."
Downstairs, Nathan surveyed the clothes hanging in his closet. He hadn't dressed up for quite some time. Not wanting to be too formal, he chose a striped light blue button-down shirt with navy blue pants and matching suspenders. He combed his hair, deciding he could use a haircut sooner rather than later. Nerves he hadn't felt in years washed over him when he opened the door to leave his room. Allie and Robert were just coming down the stairs, followed closely by Sarah in a rose pink dress and newly-styled hair. All four of them excitedly left the house and went next door.
After setting out all the food on the table, Elizabeth had just hung up her apron when she heard a knock at the door. Taking a deep breath to calm the jitters, she opened the door and invited her neighbors inside. "Please come in. We are so happy to have you here." Allie hugged Elizabeth, as did Robert, and Sarah shyly said hello. Elizabeth caught Nathan's gaze, her heart speeding up as a meaningful look passed between them. She noticed the way his blue clothes brought out his eyes, and couldn't deny he was a very good looking man.
Jack stopped dead in his tracks as he came downstairs from changing his clothes. Having gone to an all-boys school and not spending much time with girls his own age, he had never really thought much about romantic relationships. But he took in a sharp breath when he laid his eyes on the raven-haired beauty in a pink dress who looked about his age. Hoping no one noticed his reaction, Jack joined his mother and tried to calmly say hello to their guests.
"Dinner is on the table," Elizabeth announced. "Why don't we all sit and eat before it gets cold." She sat at one end of the table with Jack at her left and Sarah at her right. Robert sat at the other end with Allie to his right next to his sister, and Nathan to his left next to Jack. "Son, would you mind saying a blessing on the food for us?" Elizabeth asked.
Somewhat anxious, Jack agreed and said a short prayer before they started passing the food around the table. Everyone seemed a little apprehensive at first, but Robert got the conversation started while everyone was dishing up their food.
"So, are you both enjoying being back in Hope Valley?" he asked Elizabeth and Jack. "It's always nice to see familiar faces in town who I know won't be giving me any trouble." They all chuckled, except for Sarah who rolled her eyes at her big brother.
Keeping the conversation going, Elizabeth thoughtfully responded: "It is definitely an adjustment coming back and getting used to something so familiar, yet so different at the same time. But I never did feel perfectly at home in Hamilton when we moved back there many years ago. I'm excited to be back home in Hope Valley. I can't wait to begin teaching here again, and how fun it is to have Sarah in class with me." She turned to face her new student. "What subjects do you enjoy in school? Jack enjoys reading, and just like Allie was when I taught her, he is quite the math whiz."
Sarah looked at Jack, who quickly looked away when their eyes met, as dark pink flooded his cheeks. He looked much older than the 15 years Allie had told her he was. Based on his height and build, he could pass for a grown man; but she was unsure what to think of this mostly city-turned country boy. He was handsome, but Sarah already had a suitor and didn't need a love-struck little boy chasing after her. "I promised Momma I would go to school until I was 17, then I'll either marry Jimmy Davis, or if that doesn't work out, attend college after I graduate next year."
Jack's hopes fell when she spoke of being in a relationship with someone else. How could his heart be breaking when he barely knew this girl? Something inside of him yearned to figure out who she was by getting to know all of her likes and dislikes. Every time she would look in his direction, he couldn't help looking away to stop his body quivering from just her gaze.
Changing the subject, Robert turned to the boy he once babysat many years ago. "So, Jack. I hear you have questions about the Mounties. Thanks to your mother, when I was your age Nathan was able to answer my questions and help me understand what I would face if I decided to join the Mounties. Your father was important to all of us who knew him in this community, and his death was a devastating loss. I can understand why you would feel the need to delve deeper into his profession and what ultimately took his life."
Unexpectedly, tears stung Elizabeth's eyes. Part of her reaction was thinking about her late husband and how her son needed to fully understand why he was never able to meet his father. However, even beyond that, emotion also stemmed from remembering her past with Nathan and the way he always willingly helped her with her students and her son. A memory of Jack's Christening, when Nathan was the only one who gave her a break by holding her baby and making him laugh, reminded her of his thoughtfulness. Jack was a dedicated Mountie who felt it was his calling to serve; Nathan took great pride in doing his duty, but people he cared about was always his first priority.
Jack looked at Nathan and Robert, not really knowing how to begin or what to ask. "I felt a strong connection to my dad's horse Sergeant, but he's gone now. I hoped that coming here would also bring me closer to him. Mr. Grant, did you ever know my dad or serve with him?"
A feeling of dread came over Nathan, who just happened to look at Elizabeth at the moment tears began falling down her face. "I never had the pleasure of meeting your father in person or serving with him, but I did hear about his bravery from many who did serve with him." Trying to lighten the mood, Nathan had an idea. "Since you were so good with your dad's horse Sergeant, I was wondering if you could do me a big favor. My horse Newton needs to be groomed and ridden every day. Because of my injury, I'm unable to do that for him right now. Would you be interested? I would be willing to pay you."
His face lighting up for the first time in months, Jack excitedly answered: "Yes! That sounds amazing! My mom promised to get me a new horse after our house is built with a fenced yard and a barn, but I miss riding. Can I meet him tomorrow?"
Sarah suddenly seemed interested in joining the conversation. "I just love horses, and Mountie horses are so special and smart. Robert lets me ride Lucky sometimes! He is beautiful, strong, and disciplined."
Hearing an attractive girl speak about her love of horses caught Jack's attention, making him even more interested in spending time with her. "Maybe we can go for a ride together sometime," he let slip out before thinking it through.
"Maybe," she replied. "But I don't know how Jimmy would feel about me spending time with another boy...although you are younger than me, so he probably wouldn't worry too much about that."
Nathan interjected to try and help Jack out of an awkward conversation. "If it's ok with your mom, I would be happy to take you to meet Newton after church tomorrow."
Feeling gratitude, Elizabeth answered: "I'm fine with Jack meeting Newton, as long as I'm invited as well." She flashed a smile at Nathan, and he looked pleased with the proposition.
Usually not the quiet one, Allie sat observing her master plan at work. She couldn't believe her request for Mrs. Thornton to replace her at the school was granted, and her dad was finding his way back into the lives of Elizabeth and Jack so seamlessly...and without much effort on her part. "Why don't I pack a picnic to share after church services, and then after we eat we can all go to the livery to spend time with Newton and Lucky?" Allie suggested. "I can't wait for the day when I can ride again, but I don't think that is going to happen for a while." She patted her stomach and the baby kicked her. She grabbed Robert's hand and guided it to where the baby was intent on making its presence known. "I'm sorry, but I may be in need of your bathroom, since this kid makes me need to go all the time."
Elizabeth giggled. "I know all about that. Please make yourself at home and use whatever facilities are necessary. I'm sure you know the way, since this house is an exact replica of yours. I will clear the dinner plates and start serving pie."
Annoyed he couldn't help clear the dishes and serve dessert, Nathan was grateful when Robert offered his assistance, and instead he sat admiring how stunning Elizabeth looked in her blue floral dress and flattering hairstyle. His mind began to wander, imagining putting his fingers through her hair and smelling her sweet scent of vanilla and roses. When she held him close that morning, he unintentionally breathed her in, and she was so intoxicating that he longed for more. Elizabeth lightly brushed his shoulder with her arm as she set a piece of apple pie in front of him, jarring him out of his thoughts. He looked up to thank her, but they both froze for a split second as their eyes locked. "Thank you," he barely voiced, captivated by her stare.
"Yum!" Allie blurted out as she returned to the table and saw the pie. It was then she noticed her dad and former teacher break eye contact, and she scolded herself from spoiling their moment. "This pie looks delicious, did you make it yourself?" Allie asked, trying to restart the conversation.
"Rosemary brought it over," she admitted. "I'm just getting back into cooking and baking, since I was rarely even allowed in the kitchen in Hamilton. Elizabeth went to grab the coffee pot and poured some for herself, Nathan, and Robert, the others settling for milk to drink with their dessert.
"Dinner was great Elizabeth," Nathan assured her. "We were grateful for the invitation."
Everyone finally seemed comfortable together, and they talked and laughed for quite a while after everyone was full. Robert finally insisted on getting Allie home to rest, and Sarah decided to go back with them, to get settled in for the night. Jack cleared the dishes to the sink, but Nathan insisted on helping wash them with Elizabeth, so he went upstairs to finish the book he had been reading earlier in the day.
"Are you sure you want to help with dishes, Nathan?" Elizabeth looked at him with concern, eyeing the cane and his bad leg. "You need to rest and heal. But if you insist on helping me, why don't you dry and I'll wash."
He leaned against the counter to give himself more stability and grabbed a towel. "Put me to work, my lady."
Working in silence at first, both were acutely aware of their close proximity and the light brushing of their hands each time dishes were exchanged. "I hope you are feeling better after this morning," Elizabeth eventually articulated. "I couldn't stop thinking about what you told me, and hoping that sharing the details of your accident would help you heal emotionally."
When Elizabeth's hand brushed his again while passing a plate to be dried, Nathan held on to her hand and set the plate on the counter. "It helped. I was able to sleep without nightmares today for several hours for the first time since the accident. I owe it all to you." Seeing the sink empty, he released her hand and quickly dried the last plate. "Would you join me outside on the porch to watch the sunset? I need to share something else with you."
Curious, Elizabeth nodded and took his arm as they walked out the front door and sat in the chairs Lee had given the Thorntons to sit on outside. Dusk was settling on their beautiful little town, and the sky was turning shades of purple and pink. "How could I have forgotten just how breathtaking it is here? I feel like I've missed out on so much over the past several years."
"I know what you mean," Nathan agreed, enjoying the view of both the sunset and the most stunning woman he had ever known. But a feeling of dread formed a pit in his stomach at what he was about to reveal to her next. "Elizabeth, I still feel this deep connection to you that I felt when I first came to town all of those years ago. I'm sure you know it is there, because without it, I wouldn't have been able to share the details of my accident with you. I would like to explore it further; but before that can happen, I have a confession I have been holding inside for over 15 years."
Seeing stress and pain written on Nathan's face, suddenly made Elizabeth worry. Over 15 years ago? she wondered to herself. Surely this isn't something to do with Jack and Fort Clay? Her heart started pounding in her throat, and she couldn't even get any words to come out of her mouth. Her eyes begged him to spare her from any further hurt regarding the death of her husband.
Clearing his throat, Nathan started at the beginning. "As you know, I became a Mountie at 17 years old for several reasons. One was to get away from my broken home and make something of myself, unlike what I felt my father did. Colleen married Dylan, who constantly had disputes with the law, and I knew she had married someone who would hurt her like our father hurt us. I wanted to be the "good" person in the family, and get away from home as quickly as possible. When Colleen died, I went home to help for a few weeks; but duty called, and I had to go back to where I was stationed. My mom was taking care of Allie for a little while, but it became a burden on her, so I stepped up to become her guardian. As you know, I eventually adopted her. But I still sent Allie to visit my mom when I was sent on missions where I would be gone for weeks at a time and didn't want to just leave her with another Mountie family. I was stationed at Fort Clay, and had been chosen to lead a training mission."
Elizabeth's blood ran cold. "You were at Fort Clay? Was this the same time Jack was called to lead a training mission? Did you actually meet him or serve together?" So many questions plagued her mind as she waited for Nathan to continue.
"No!" he insisted. "As I prepared to lead the mission, I got word that Allie was very sick. My mother couldn't handle it and asked me to come take care of Allie myself. I was granted emergency family leave, and they sent for a replacement to lead the training mission instead."
Without warning, Elizabeth stood and started pacing back and forth on the porch. "Jack was your replacement." It wasn't a question; she just knew. Her mind was working to process the news. She looked at Nathan and saw what seemed to be guilt and sadness in his eyes. Part of her wanted to be angry and blame him for the loss of Jack, but she had come too far over the course of the past several years to let herself go down that road. She closed her eyes and prayed to find the right words to say.
"Nathan, I hope you don't blame yourself for Jack's death, because you were taking care of your family. If I'm being honest, I spent years being angry with Jack for choosing to leave me so soon into our marriage for an assignment. I thought he always put the Mounties first, because he felt it was his calling. But you have shown many instances of putting your family first, all the while serving as a very impeccable and noble officer." She sat back down and placed her hand on his arm. "I hope you can put this behind you with no guilt, because what I realized after years of working through this, is that no one is to blame for that accident. All we can do is trust in God to help us through such tragedies in our lives."
He should have felt relieved, but fatigue hit him like an ocean wave. Nathan stood up and just wanted to leave, before he had to also explain the real reason he had come to Hope Valley after Jack's death. It was a conversation they would need to have another time. "Thank you for being so understanding about this. I've held it inside for so long, and I don't even know how to feel now that I've finally shared it with you. I was unsure what you would want me to tell your son, or even if he needed to know." He leaned against the porch railing, and closed his eyes.
"You look so tired, Nathan. Please let me help you home. Maybe someday Jack will need to know about Fort Clay; but for now, let's keep it between us." She stood next to him and slipped her arm through his, helping his weary body back home.
When they reached the front door, he slid his hand down her arm and took her hand in his, squeezing it gently. He felt the same electric current that passed between them every time they touched. They were so close, he almost couldn't breathe. "Goodnight, Elizabeth," he murmured. Slowly pulling his hand away from her, he went inside, leaning his body against the door to calm the racing of his heart.
On the other side of the door, Elizabeth also had to lean against it for support. Conflicting emotions flooded her, and all she wanted to do was go home and climb into bed. Her head was spinning from all of the emotional confessions Nathan had unloaded on her in one day. Hoping a good night's rest would make things more clear, she rushed home and went directly to her bedroom, collapsing on her bed and falling into a deep sleep.