A/N: ***Trigger warning: this chapter contains dubious-consent as well as sexual assault.***

Chapter 19

Life changed drastically after that. Killian had waterproof and wireless cameras installed all over her boat, which recorded her every move while she worked so he could have eyes on her every moment. He would watch the footage every night and berate her if anything looked mildly suspicious. He constantly tracked her phone, calling her the moment she stepped even a few feet away from where she was supposed to be, gaining another backhand slap across the face if it took her more than three rings to answer. He even kept her away from working at the diner for the first few weeks, saying she couldn't be trusted yet to work there, since clearly Ruby was such a bad influence on her.

After two weeks of following his new rules, Killian decided to reward her like a child by letting her go back to work at the diner, but only on the weekend. The rest of the week she was expected to go right home after work and stay there until the following morning. She was so eager to start her first shift in a few weeks that she practically ran to the diner, excited to see her friends again.

But that excitement was short-lived after a few hours.

"Hey, Killian just walked in," Ana whispered as Emma was preparing drinks for her new table.

"Really?" she asked, rolling her eyes as she scanned the diner. Sure enough, lounging in one of the booths like he owned the place was Killian Jones, complete with his dirty boots resting on the vinyl seat.

"I'll take care of him." She sighed, picking up the tray full of drinks to deliver to the new table.

"What do you want, Killian?" she asked, rolling her eyes slightly. The stench of rum was already wafting off his skin.

"I was feeling peckish sitting at home all alone. So I decided to get myself a bite to eat, and keep an eye on you in the process." Killian smirked, picking his nail with a fork.

"Fine, whatever. What do you want?" Eleanore asked, pulling out her order pad.

"How about a nice fat reuben sandwich with extra fries. And make sure that fat piece of lard in there makes the fries extra crispy." Killian smirked. "And a beer, if you please."

"Killian, it's barely noon. And clearly you've already had a couple already. You should probably hold off, at least until you eat something," Eleanore said, scribbling Killian's order onto a blank page.

"I said I want a beer," he said, grabbing her wrist tightly, squeezing it until she felt the stress on her bones.

"Fine!" she said, ripping her arm from his grasp.

"That's a good girl." Killian laughed, sitting back against the booth. "And let's make it quick, shall we? I'm famished." Eleanore rolled her eyes as she handed the ticket to Louis, purposely leaving out the comment Killian made about the kind man who cooked for Granny most nights. At least Killian would likely leave once he ate and drank a beer or two.

She couldn't have been more wrong.

Killian stayed at the diner all day, drinking beer and glaring at Eleanore as she continued to work, making a dirty comment every time she laughed and joked with Ana.

"Listen, you need to order more food if you want to stay here," Eleanore said, clearing the fourth beer bottle from the table.

"Why don't you bring me some of Granny's famous meatloaf then? With extra potatoes and gravy. And don't forget another beer," Killian said, his words slurring slightly. She knew that at this rate he would be wasted by the time she got home, which never ends well for her. The more he drank, the louder he got. And the more she tried to get him to quiet down, the more angry he got. Eventually, Granny needed to step in and intervene.

"Mr. Jones, I am going to have to ask you to leave my establishment before I am forced to make you leave," Granny whispered, in a tone that would scare the barnacles off any ship as she placed his lengthy bill in front of him on the table.

"Nah, I'm alright. I'll stay a little longer," Killian said with a cocky attitude.

"Sir, that was not a request. It was an order. If you do not leave my restaurant immediately, I will call the sheriff, and she will force you to leave. Only, she won't let you go home. She'll give you a private cell at the sheriff's station for the night," Granny said, her face dangerously close to Killian's.

"Fine," he shrieked, trying to push her face away from his, but in his drunken state he missed. He stood on shaky legs and stumbled over to Eleanore, who was cleaning off a table in the corner. "Here, Swan. Take care of this. And don't be late." He tossed his bill at her, eventually stumbling out of the door. Eleanore sighed when she looked down at the bill he had racked up. She shoved the paper into her pocket, hoping she made enough in tips that day to cover the bill.

At the end of the night, while Ana was in the back putting the final touches on her closing chores, Eleanore sat at the bar and counted the cash tips she had received after working all day. After covering Killian's bill, she would only bring home around thirty dollars. That was all she had left after a busy day on her feet. She felt like crying. If he was going to insist on babysitting her every time she worked, she would never save anything. Ana offered her a ride home, but she insisted on walking. It would give her time alone to have a good cry before she had to face Killian again. She wished upon every star she saw that Killian would be asleep by the time she got home.

Luck wasn't on her side when she walked into the house to see Killian sitting on the couch, sipping yet another beer.

"Right on time. Such a good girl," he slurred, clearly drunk.

"Whatever." She sighed as she kicked off her sneakers, her feet grateful to be out of those shoes. "I'm going to go take a shower and go to bed," she said, walking past him.

"Wait…" he said, grabbing her wrist as she passed. "I'm going to need your help with something first." He smirked and pulled her toward the couch. It didn't take long for her to notice the slight bulge in his pants.

"Not tonight, Killian, I'm exhausted."

"I don't care if you're tired, Swan. Get on your knees like a good little girl," he said, guiding her down in front of him. She sighed, knowing he wouldn't leave her alone until he got off. Hopefully he wasn't too drunk and it wouldn't take too long; she really was exhausted. She knelt down in front of him while he unbuttoned his pants, quickly pulling out his semi-hard dick. "Open wide." He smirked, waving the disgusting appendage in front of her face. Her hand was shaking slightly as she grabbed the member in front of her, slowly stroking the shaft, swallowing thickly while she prepared to take it into her mouth.

As soon as her lips parted, Killian practically shoved it in, not caring that Eleanore needed a minute. She tried not to gag as she took more and more of him into her mouth, until she could feel the tip making contact with the back of her throat.

"You can go deeper, Swan." He forced his penis down her throat slightly. She gagged, which made Killian moan with pleasure. "That's my good girl," he said, placing her hand over the top of her head, guiding her movements to ensure she took all of him in.

She continued to move her head up and down over his shaft, each pass bringing her closer and closer to vomiting, while he grew closer and closer to climax. Killian moaned loudly as he came, holding her head in place so he could fill her mouth with his cum, laughing at how uncomfortable he knew it made her feel. Killian tasted bitter and metallic and it felt like the warm substance was burning her tongue.

Gina doesn't taste like this, she thought. Gina never hurts when I taste her…

"Swallow," he directed, pulling his now flacid penis out of her mouth. Eleanore shook her head and tried to get up to find a tissue to expel the disgusting substance in her mouth. "I said SWALLOW!" Killian demanded, grabbing her by the wrist. He held her in place until she swallowed, her face showing her disgust the entire time. "Good girl." He patted her head like a child. "Now you can go take a shower," he said, closing his eyes and leaning back into the couch, his penis still laying in his lap. She stood up and rushed into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. She could hear Killian yell something through the door, assuming it had something to do with her slamming the door.

She ripped open the shower curtain and turned on the water, waiting for it to warm up. As soon as the water was loud enough to mask her sounds, she ran to the toilet and shoved her fingers down her throat, causing her gag reflex to activate. She dry heaved for a few seconds, sticking her fingers down her throat a few more times, desperate to expel Killian from inside her. Eventually she threw up, the disgusting white substance floating on the top of the water. She made herself throw up a few more times, making sure to rid her body of every cell of Killian. She ripped off her clothes and practically threw herself into the shower, the scalding hot water burning her skin.

She cried as the water washed over her, turning her pale skin red. She missed Gina. She missed her so much. And what made things even worse was the fact that she wouldn't be seeing Gina next week. And she didn't know when she would see her next. She continued to cry as she scrubbed her skin raw under the scalding hot water, washing her hair so violently she thought she was going to go bald. But no matter what she did, she could still feel his hand on top of her head, keeping her in place. She would have stayed in the shower all night but was forced out once the hot water eventually ran cold, causing her slightly burned skin to shiver.

She wrapped herself in a towel and walked out of the bathroom, relieved to see that Killian had gone to bed already. She tiptoed into the bedroom to grab fresh clothes and returned to the bathroom to get dressed. She would definitely be sleeping on the couch, the thought of sleeping next to that disgusting man made her sick to her stomach again. Before she settled in for the night, she pulled out her journal, scribbling three simple words, "I miss Gina."

The full moon appeared in the sky as Eleanore stared at it through the windows of the diner. I should be with Gina right now… she thought as she returned her attention back to cleaning the table in front of her, trying to distract herself, failing miserably.

"Hey, you okay?" Ana asked, sensing something was off about her friend.

"Yeah…just tired, I guess," Eleanore said, trying to focus on the task at hand.

"I know that feeling." Ana laughed, helping Eleanore clear the table. "If you need anything, let me know." She smiled, grabbing the dish pan and carrying it to the dish room in the back.

"Actually…" Eleanore said, following Ana into the back. "Can you cover for me for an hour or so? There's something I need to do," Eleanore said, hoping her friend could help and wouldn't ask too many questions.

"Sure, no problem. It's slow. I'll text you if things get crazy before you get back."

"Thanks, Ana! I owe you one," Eleanore said, untying her apron and stashing it under the counter, swapping it with her bag. She rushed out of the diner and ran down the street, ripping open a familiar door and rushing up the stairs inside. She crossed her fingers of her left hand as she knocked on the familiar door, hoping the office wasn't empty. A moment later the door opened, revealing the exact person Eleanore was searching for.

"Miss Swan, what a surprise. Is everything alright?" Doctor Hopper asked.

"I'm sorry, Doctor Hopper, I know it's late. I should have called."

"Don't be sorry. That's what I'm here for," Doctor Hopper said, sensing Eleanore was upset. "Please, come in." He stepped aside, giving Eleanore enough room to enter the small office.

"Thanks…" Eleanore said, entering the quiet office, taking a seat on the couch.

"What's been going on?" he asked, taking his usual seat across from Eleanore.

"I'm not doing so well, Doc," Eleanore said.

"Can you be more specific?" Doctor Hopper asked.

"Well…due to circumstances, I'm not able to see Gina. And I know, I shouldn't be seeing her anyway, because I'm still technically with Killian…but…" Eleanore said, her leg starting to shake.

"Eleanore, is everything alright at home?" Doctor Hopper asked, sensing Eleanore's hesitation.

"Yeah…well…no…not really," Eleanore said, her voice so quiet and low.

"Eleanore, has he ever harmed you? Become violent?" Doctor Hopper asked.

"Well…no not really…he slapped me once or twice, but never anything worse. He's just…he's different, I guess…or maybe he was always like this, but I never noticed…I don't know…" Eleanore said, indecision in her voice.

"Can you be more specific again?"

"He's just…he's so aggressive and possessive. And he treats me like a child. He tells me what to do and even calls me a 'good girl' like I'm a child. And he pressures me to do things…sexual things…that I don't want to do…" Eleanore said.

"Eleanore, has he ever forced himself on you? Against your will?" Doctor Hopper asked, leaning toward his patient.

"No. I always let him…he never… you know …" Eleanore says, whispering the last part.

"But you don't seem to enjoy being with him in that manner. How is that not forcing himself?" Doctor Hopper asked, his face turning very stern.

"Because I let him. I don't say no."

"But you don't enjoy it?"

"No…but it's easier to say yes and let him do what he wants than to deal with him when he's angry," Eleanore explained. Doctor Hopper sighed, a little frustrated.

"So, when did you start to realize that Mr. Jones was starting to act differently?" he asked.

"I don't know…maybe six months ago? Maybe a year? I don't remember…" Eleanore shrugged.

"Could it be around the time you started seeing Gina?" Doctor Hopper asked.

"Yeah…yeah maybe," Eleanore said, perking up a little.

"Could it possibly be that he was always this way, and you only just now started to notice his behavior because you met someone who finally treated you right?" Doctor Hopper asked.

"Yeah…ummm…yeah I think you're right…" Eleanore said, a light bulb going off in her head. "But I still think he's getting worse though." Eleanore shrugged.

"Now, I have to ask. Is there a reason you are still with Killian, considering you don't have feelings for him any longer?"

"To be honest, Doc, I don't think I ever had feelings for Killian. I just thought I was supposed to have feelings for him," Eleanore said, looking up shyly.

"Because he told you the two of you were in a relationship before you lost your memories?" Doctor Hopper asked.

"Yeah. But that's the thing, Doctor Hopper. I don't think we were in a relationship! I can't explain it, Doc. I just…I don't feel it. I never felt it with Killian. Not like the way I feel with Gina," Eleanore explained, her mood perking.

"Let's double back to my previous question. Is there a reason you're still with Killian and not building a life with Gina?" Doctor Hopper asked.

"I…yeah…I want to. I want to be with Gina more than anything. But things are…complicated. We come from two different worlds," Eleanore explained, tears welling in her eyes.

"Yes, but if two people truly love each other, they will find a way to be together," Doctor Hopper said.

"Not always…" Doctor Hopper looked at her, waiting for her to continue. "A bird may love a fish…but where would they live?" Eleanore said, a tear falling down her face.

"Then figure out a way to build some wings," Doctor Hopper said. Eleanore wiped her eyes as she thought about his words.

"It's not that simple," she whispered.

"I bet Gina feels the same way that you do. Perhaps if you two spoke, you could figure out a way to be together where you are both safe," he said, offering her words of encouragement.

"Maybe…" Eleanore said, fighting back tears.

"Why don't we talk about something different?" Doctor Hopper said, sensing Eleanore's distress, knowing now was not the time to push that topic any farther. "Have you had any new memories surface?"

"No. Not since the last time when I remembered spending the night with her for the first time." She paused to take a deep breath. "I'm starting to think that was the last memory I'm going to have. Maybe it's time to move on from trying to remember my life. Maybe I should forget the past and focus on the future."

"We could take a break. Give your mind a little rest for a few weeks then try again," Doctor Hopper said.

"No…I…I think I might be finished. It's been seven years. At this point, there's a reason I can't remember."

"And what do you think the reason is?"

"I don't know…maybe whatever happened to me was so bad that my brain doesn't want to remember," Eleanore lied.

"That's certainly a possibility," Doctor Hopper said, pausing for a moment. "Why don't we take a break from memory recollection for a while? Like you said, it's been seven years. Maybe your mind needs a break."

"Yeah…maybe…"

"I'd like you to keep writing in your journal, since it seems to be the most helpful tool. And we can continue to have sessions together, even if we don't work on memory recollection."

"Yeah…I can do that…" Eleanore said, her phone suddenly chiming in her pocket.

"Sorry." She pulled her phone out quickly to see Ana sent her a text message. "Shit. I have to go. I'm technically working right now and the diner is getting busy again. Thanks for letting me talk, Doc. I feel better now that I got some of that off my chest," Eleanore said, moving toward the door.

"It's my pleasure, Miss Swan. You know where to find me if you ever need another impromptu meeting." Doctor Hopper chuckled as he walked Eleanore to the door.

"Thanks, Doc. I'll call to make another appointment," Eleanore said, rushing out of the office and back to the diner, thanking Ana profusely for covering for her.

"You didn't meet Gina again this month?" Ruby asked as she sat across the table from Eleanore, sharing a plate of fries. The full moon was a few days ago, and once again Eleanore didn't see Gina.

"No…" Eleanore said sadly.

"What happened? Did you guys break up?" Ruby asked.

"No, nothing like that. It's Killian. I think he's starting to suspect something. We decided to hold off for a while until things cool down," Eleanore answered, trying to hold back the tears.

"I guess we need to start covering our tracks better," Ruby said, popping a fry into her mouth. "Or maybe you should start setting an alarm so you don't skip work after making sweet, sweet lady love all night long." Ruby winked.

"It's not all night…we usually eat dinner first." Eleanore smirked.

"Well, of course. Need to carb up before the marathon." Ruby laughed. Eleanore burst into laughter, laughing for the first time in two months.

"I miss that," Eleanore said, wiping the tears that formed from laughing so hard.

"Me too." Ruby smiled. "Should we have an actual girl's night soon?" Ruby asked.

"No…we probably shouldn't. Killian gets so pissed when I'm not home."

"When are you going to dump his stupid ass and move in with your lady? I hate seeing you like this."

"It's complicated, Ruby. And I'm working on it. I need a solid financial foundation before I do anything, because you know he's going to fire me the moment I move out."

"Oh yeah. He'll definitely fire you. He's sensitive like that." Ruby laughed.

"That's for sure." Eleanore chuckled.

"Listen. I know he can be a real creep sometimes. And I'm sure he's been extra douchie the last two months. Why don't you knock off early today and head to the beach for a little. If Killian comes looking for you, I'll tell him you just left and you should be home any minute. Go clear your head," Ruby said, finishing the last fry.

"Are you sure?" Eleanore asked.

"I'm positive. Get the hell out of here," Ruby said, standing and clearing the plate, returning to work.

"Thanks, Ruby!" Eleanore said, rushing behind the counter to grab her bag. She ran out of the diner and headed straight to the beach. She ripped her sneakers off the moment she got there, a smile reaching across her face when her feet felt the sand between her toes for the first time since she carried Gina back into the water. She closed her eyes as she stood in the sand, the ocean breeze kissing her skin, and she savored the feeling of being near the water without Killian's watchful eye. She sat in the sand, her eyes scanning the beach, half expecting to see Gina's head bobbing in the water, disappointed when all she saw were waves rising and crashing against the shore.

Dear Gina.

I miss you. It's only been two months but it feels like an eternity. I'm sitting at the beach right now, and even though it's in the middle of the day and far past the full moon, I half expected to see your bright shining face popping up through the waves.

Things are getting tough here. Killian is becoming so overbearing and controlling, I hate every moment I spend with him. I'm trying so hard, Gina. I'm trying so hard to save enough to get my own place, so we can finally be together without sneaking around. Maybe I can find a little cabin on the beach, somewhere that you can come too. I don't know how that would work though.

She sighed as she looked back over at the water, checking to see if Regina was there once more.

I saw Doctor Hopper again a few days ago. I told him I think I was done trying to remember my past. That I should forget the past and focus on the future, since there has to be a reason that I can't remember. There must be a reason that even now, after seven years, I still can't remember who I am. He asked me if I had a theory as to why I still can't remember. I told him I thought it was because, whatever happened to me was so bad that my mind refuses to remember. But that's a lie. I think it's because I stopped thinking about her. That mystery woman who pulled me out of the water and saved me. The same woman who proposed to me and wanted to have kids with me. The woman who whispered she loved me before she disappeared into the water. I stopped thinking about her, Gina, because I started thinking about someone else. You. I stopped trying to remember her to focus all my attention on you. On being with you. On building a future with you. I can't remember her because I'm constantly thinking about you. And you know what, I'm okay with that. She never came back for me. After seven years, she never came looking for me. She dropped me on the beach and left me, so why should I continue to strain myself to remember her? I know you've lost someone too. And I know you're still mourning her, even if you tell me you've moved on.

Eleanore sighed once more, sniffing back her tears, her hand moving automatically to the shell necklace she wore around her neck. The same shell that was tied around her neck by her savior.

And that's why I also can never let her go, no matter how hard I try. She saved me.

Eleanore stopped writing suddenly when a tear fell onto the page. She wiped her face clean and collected herself to finish writing.

I wish I could send you this letter. I wish I could talk to you. I wish I could see you, even if just for a moment. One fleeting moment with you is better than this emptiness I feel.

I miss you so much, Gina. And I don't know when I'll be able to see you again.

She slammed her journal closed, too upset to continue writing. Her heart was broken knowing she didn't know when she could see Gina again. She checked her phone to see the time and realized her shift would technically be ending soon, which meant she would have to return home before Killian started looking for her. She stood and brushed the sand off her pants, walking toward town slowly, stopping to put on her shoes once she reached the sidewalk.

"Hey. Did Killian cause any trouble while I was gone?" she asked, hopping onto the stool against the counter.

"He did call, a little while ago. But I told him you were busy with customers and he seemed content with that. He made sure I wrote down his dinner order, so I could remind you to bring him dinner." Ruby laughed sarcastically.

"Oh good. I would hate for him to get the wrong dinner." Eleanore rolled her eyes.

"I waited to put in his order until you got back. All kidding aside, I didn't want it to be cold. For your sake."

"Thanks, Ruby. I really do appreciate that," Eleanore said, averting her gaze out of shame. Ruby put in their order and offered Eleanore a cup of coffee, sitting next to her friend while she waited.

"Hey, you know if I didn't live with Granny, you could totally stay with me," Ruby offered.

"Thanks, Ruby," Eleanore said, looking down at her coffee. A few minutes later, Eleanore's order was ready. She reached into her bag for her wallet but was immediately halted by her friend.

"This one's on me. I know he expects you to pay for everything. I got this one," Ruby said.

"Ruby, are you sure?"

"Of course. Now get going before that sad excuse for a man comes looking for you and causing trouble," Ruby said, handing Eleanore her take-out bags.

She made her way home slower than usual, literally dragging her feet. Killian was waiting for her, of course, already drinking a beer. I wonder how many he's had so far… she thought as she kicked off her shoes at the front door.

"What took you so long! I'm starving," Killian yelled from the living room, too lazy to turn around and look at her.

"I had to wait for the food," she lied. She served Killian his meal in the living room, making sure to bring him a fresh beer before she sat down. They were silent as they ate, the sound of Killian chewing in between yelling at the screen was the only sounds in the entire house.

"You know, Swan, I've noticed you've been sleeping on the couch a lot recently, Killian said as he picked his teeth and grabbed the rest of Eleanore's fries out of her container.

"Yeah…I've been having trouble sleeping recently. So I come out here to watch TV and I eventually fall asleep."

"What's the matter? Your guilty mind keeping you up?" Killian asked.

"What? No. I've always had trouble sleeping, you just never noticed," Eleanore lied. She wasn't sleeping on the couch because she couldn't sleep. She was doing it to get away from him.

"Whatever." He didn't like her answer. "From now on, you are not to sleep on the couch. You are mine! And you will sleep next to me all night, every night. No matter what," Killian demanded. "And if you can't sleep, you count some fucking sheep. But you keep your stupid ass in that bed! Do you hear me!"

"Yeah, fine. Whatever," Eleanore said nonchalantly.

She played by Killian's rules for the next few weeks, sleeping next to him even when every cell in her body was telling her to run away. She laid awake most nights, staring at the ceiling and thinking of Gina. It had been over two months since she last held her Nenriel in her arms, and there was still no hope in sight.

One night, roughly a week and a half after the last full moon, Eleanore had had enough. She was supposed to be at the docks early the next day, and Killian drank a few beers at dinner, which meant he would likely be sound asleep all night. All she needed to do was make sure she was up and out the door before he woke up and realized she wasn't there. She tiptoed out of the room and into the living room, turning on the TV before settling into the couch. She flipped through the channels and chose on an old episode of Friends when she heard a noise coming from the bedroom. She listened closely for a few minutes, settling back in when she didn't hear anything else. My mind is playing tricks on me, clearly, she thought to herself as she turned her attention back to the screen. Her eyes were just starting to droop when the bedroom door slammed open, scaring the living daylights out of her.

"SWAN!" Killian screamed, rushing toward her. "WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT SLEEPING ON THE COUCH?" Killian grabbed her arm and pulled her off the couch.

"I wasn't sleeping! I was just watching TV. I didn't want to wake you! I was going to come to bed, I promise," Eleanore pleaded with Killian as he dragged her back into the bedroom.

"Bullshit!" Killian yelled, throwing Eleanore onto the bed before climbing into bed next to her. "Stay the fuck in bed, bitch! Or I'll tie you to it." She curled into a ball on her side, her back facing Killian as she fought back the tears. All she wanted was one night away from him.

Killian settled in behind her and wrapped his large arm around her waist to keep her in place. As soon as she felt his arm and his hot breath against her neck, the floodgates opened and the tears began to fall. She silently cried herself to sleep that night, thoughts of Gina flooding her mind.

Killian was already awake when she woke up the next morning, which made her feel uneasy. He's never awake that early. He is usually asleep for a few more hours while she gets an early start.

Not today.

She quickly got ready for her day and left the bedroom and was met with Killian, dressed and sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for Eleanore. She resisted the urge to say something snarky to him, knowing she was in extra trouble for trying to sleep on the couch the night before.

"Look who finally decided to get up," Killian said.

"I didn't oversleep," Eleanore said, looking up at the clock on the wall, double checking to make sure she really wasn't late.

"Yes, but you're going to be late today after you make me breakfast. You should have dragged your sorry ass out of bed earlier," Killian said, so nonchalantly.

"I didn't know you wanted breakfast. You usually sleep late," Eleanore said, approaching the kitchen slowly.

"Yes, but given your inability to follow simple directions, I need to make sure you go directly to work, even if that means I have to get up early," Killian said. "Now, make me fucking breakfast. I want eggs."

"Ummm…okay….give me a few minutes." She immediately went to work making Killian breakfast, making sure to make enough coffee for the both of them.

"Where is the toast?" Killian asked as soon as Eleanore set the plate of scrambled eggs in front of him, along with a fresh cup of coffee.

"Oh…give me a minute," Eleanore said, rushing back to make toast.

"Damn it, Swan. Can't you do anything right?" Killian asked, rather aggressively. Eleanore bit her tongue as she waited for the toast to pop, ready to coat the bread with butter as soon as it was ready. Her hand gravitated toward her neck where her shell necklace resided, seeking it out for comfort.

Except today, it wasn't there.

Her heart stopped as she searched her neck and shirt, hoping it simply fell off while she was cooking, but found nothing.

"Something wrong?" Killian asked, shoving a mouthful of food in his mouth.

"My…my necklace…it's missing," Eleanore said, searching the floor and the counters for any sign of the purple shell, once again finding nothing. She raced into the bedroom and searched the bed, pulling the blankets and sheets off, shaking them all, as well as each pillow. And each time her necklace was nowhere to be seen. She retraced her steps and even dug into the couch, and still her necklace was gone. She held back her tears as she returned to the kitchen, trying to accept the fact that her beloved shell was gone. Her hand went to her wrist, searching for the leather cuff she wore since meeting Gina, relieved to find it still there, pressed tightly against her wrist.

By the time she returned, Killian was finished eating, informing her he no longer wanted toast, and she was expected to eat it to avoid wasting food.

"Clean those." He casually sipped his coffee as he pointed to the pile of dishes in the sink. She could feel his eyes on her back, boring holes in her skin as he watched her wash the dishes.

When she was finished, he followed her out of the house and walked beside her all the way to the docks.

"Smee. Mark Swan late. Five percent off her commission today," Killian announced as Eleanore prepared her boat for departure. She pulled out of the dock quickly, pushing the boat to top speed, practically flying out of the water until she was far enough out that no one else was around. The moment she turned off the engine she screamed so loud, she was certain that even Gina could hear her miles below the surface. She went about her day as usual, paying close attention to all of her reels, making sure not to leave one full for even a few seconds, eager to get back on Killian's good side. At the end of the day, she made the tough decision to skip her usual post-work swim, opting to keep fishing a little while longer, just in case she could catch a few more fish before returning.

She could feel the scowl on Killian's face when she pulled her boat back into the dock, securing it to the post and pulling her cooler out to be counted.

"Swan. You're light today," Killian said as she passed by him on her way out.

"No, I'm not," Eleanore said, her voice sounding so weak.

"Yes you are. You're light," Killian repeated.

"No. I took in just as much as I usually do, if not more, actually."

"No, it appears your haul was quite light today. You must have spent the whole damn day swimming like the useless bitch you are," Killian said, clearly trying to embarrass her in front of everyone else.

"I didn't go swimming today, Killian," Eleanore said, standing her ground. She struggled to make her voice sound bigger as it cracked from fear.

"Bullshit! Do you fucking job, Swan, or you can find yourself somewhere else to work," Killian snapped.

"Whatever," she muttered under her breath as she tried to calmly walk away from the pier. She knew she wasn't light. She knew she caught more than most of the other men who were working that day. And she knew she did that all while being late because Killian insisted she make him breakfast.

She was so furious that she ran all the way home, a little bit of anger dissipating each time her foot hit the pavement. She was so exhausted that she fell onto the couch as soon as she got home, dozing off instantly. She woke up an hour later, realizing she overslept and had to immediately start cooking dinner. Killian was already pissed at her, and she didn't need to add fuel to the fire. She rushed around the kitchen, frantically preparing chicken and throwing it into a pan to fry it. It was faster that way, and she knew Killian liked fried chicken better than baked. Luckily, Killian was running late as well, which gave her extra time to make some rice.

The table was set and dinner was ready as soon as Killian got home, all she needed to do was crack open a beer.

"Well well well. Look what we have here," Killian said, sitting in his usual spot. He picked up a piece of chicken and took a large bite, a small dribble of grease falling down his chin. "What a good girl!" He grabbed the beer and chugged half of it in one sip.

Eleanore ate in silence, trying not to get disgusted by Killian's eating habits. Gina was always so polite when she ate. Even though she has never eaten a meal at a real table, she still has better table manners than Killian, she thought to herself as she tried to neatly eat her meal.

When he was finished eating, Killian just got up from the table and relocated in front of the TV, demanding another beer. Eleanore delivered the beer before clearing the table, preparing to wash dishes for the second time that day. Just as she was finishing up the last of the dishes, she felt Killian's arms around her from behind.

"You know, Swan. I could go for some dessert," he said, his warm breath hitting the back of her neck. She could smell the beer on his breath.

"There's probably some cookies in the cabinet," Eleanore said, her voice shaking.

"I was thinking of something a little different for dessert," Killian said, running his disgusting tongue across her neck. "Let's go into the bedroom, and you can serve me my dessert."

"Not tonight, Killian. I've had a long day and I'm exhausted."

"I said, get into the bedroom. Do as you say, or I'll do it for you," Killian growled. Eleanore sighed. She knew she wouldn't win.

"Fine…" she said. She let Killian drag her into the bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

"Take off your clothes. I want to watch you strip," Killian said, his eyes already undressing her. She sighed once more, pulling her shirt over her head, revealing her bikini top. Killian licked his lips as she pulled off her shorts, tossing them on top of her shirt.

"Yes, let me see those titties," Killian purred as she pulled her bikini top off, adding it to the pile on the floor. He was practically drooling when she took off her bottoms, leaving her completely naked in front of him.

He took two steps toward her and grabbed her ass, pulling her toward him even more. Without a word, he bent over and took her right nipple into his mouth, sucking hard. She yelped when she felt his teeth clamp down on her sensitive nipple, causing her to jump slightly. Gina never bit me. She was always so loving and gentle with me, she thought to herself, trying to hold back tears when Killian bit her other nipple.

"On the bed. Ass in the air, bitch," Killian instructed. She took a few steps toward the bed slowly, not eager for what awaited her, when she was suddenly thrust forward as Killian shoved her into the bed. Clearly, she was taking too long.

She assumed her instructed position, waiting as she heard Killian undo his pants, his belt buckle clanking as he pulled off his pants. She could feel the bed dip as he climbed behind her, slapping her ass so hard it almost made her scream.

"Will you at least wear a fucking condom this time?" Eleanore asked as she could feel the tip of his cock press against her opening.

"I already told you, Swan," he said as he thrust his hard cock into her roughly. "I will not wear those fucking things anymore. I don't care what you fucking say." She shuddered when she felt his pelvis smash into her. Her vagina felt like it was on fire from the lack of lubrication. She wasn't wet…far from it. Just being near Gina always makes me wet… she thought to herself as she endured Killian's thrusting, each more aggressive than the last.

"Killian…you're hurting me…" Eleanore said, trying to hold back the screams. "Please Killian, you're hurting me…" Her head was pulled back suddenly as Killian grabbed a handful of hair and pulled hard.

Killian growled as he pulled harder, causing her head to snap back roughly. "I don't give a fuck if you're hurting. Shut up and take it, or I'll shut you up myself," he said as he continued to slam into her. He continued to smack her ass with his free hand while he kept her head still with the other. Eleanore's silent tears hit the bed below her as her fingers gripped the sheet, trying not to cry out from the pain.

What felt like an eternity later, she suddenly felt Killian come inside her, filling her with his disgusting seed. It felt nothing like when Gina filled her with her sweet essence. With Gina, it was always warm and soft and it felt like every cell in her body was filled with love. With Killian, it felt cold and hard and rough. The thought made her heart cry out for Gina even more.

"That's my good girl." Killian smacked her ass one last time as he pulled out, his semen already beginning to trickle out of her. "Now go get yourself cleaned up. You're disgusting right now," he said, climbing off the bed and putting his pants back on.

Eleanore collapsed onto the bed for a few minutes, crying while she waited for the burning between her legs to subside. She wasn't wet and she never got wet the entire time, which made it feel like being fucked by a sandpaper dildo.

Eager to wash Killian off her body, she collected clean clothes and slowly walked into the bathroom to take a shower. She started the water and jumped in before the water even warmed up, not caring that it was too cold at first. She grabbed the showerhead and directed the cold spray to her burning vagina, trying to cool it off while flushing the disgusting material out. She looked down to watch the seman drip out of her, the normally white substance tinted red from inside her. When the water began to warm up, she directed it back to her body, when she proceeded to scrub her skin until it was raw, scrubbing her hair until her scalp was as raw as her skin.

She finally got out of the shower when the water ran cold again, knowing Killian would probably scream at her for wasting all that water for no reason. She slowly got dressed, making sure her soft cotton panties didn't irritate her already irritated core and hung up her towel. Taking a deep breath, she silently prayed that Killian was already in bed so she didn't have to deal with him anymore that day.

She was wrong.

As soon as she left the bathroom, she found Killian standing in the kitchen, her journal clutched tightly in his hands, pages already ripped out and laying on the floor around his feet.

Fuck.

A/N: Buckle up folks, things are about to get a little rough. Remember, a happy ending is guaranteed.