Helllllloooooo readers!
Finally. I FINALLY got this chapter done... took longer then I'd have liked but sadly one IRL got busy once the school year started again. Not to mentions quite a few family related issues that arose and also because at one point I got covid. Nothing too bad, but it did take a bit for me to get over it in general. So that halted my progress some.
That and I may have gotten during my recovery indulged into Space Marines 2 and loved the game.
Oh. Also, for those curious...
My favorite Xeno Faction: Necron's (Because they were the first race I bought and what got me into WH40K)
My Favorite Imperium Faction: Space Marines (Cause they're cool I mean come on, you can't say they don't look cool. Oh and Salamanders are my favorite Legion. With Ultra Marines as my second since they were of the first Imperium Faction I bought.)
Anyways that said sorry again for the wait. Wanted to get it out sooner but you know, lots of other factors came in between.
Not much more to say on the top notes here. I just hope you enjoy what I wrote and what I was trying to go for here. A little different bit considered yhe movie I thought I'd have fun with how things usually are. In some ways at least.
Disclaimer: I do NOT in any way, shape or form own Fate GO. Or any of the movies included in this story. Fate GO belongs to Type Moon/Delightworks/Aniplex. All other movie properties belong to their respective creators.
Chaldea Reacts
Chapter.9
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Fourth times, a fourth pick and a hope that the streak keeps going Pt.1…
What a lovely day…
At least if you asked one Arthur Pendragon who had come into Chaldea later on during the Lost Belts and had quickly met, and found a family amongst the other servants. Especially when it came to his knights and his sisters.
Speaking of his Knights despite not technically being 'his', were just as loyal to him as they were his sisters and… oh his sisters. He never thought having sisters would be so fun and rewarding. Even if it was only two sisters, he loved them dearly.
The first was his sister who happened to be a month younger then him and a female version of himself. One Artoria Pendragon who by the time he met her and his little sister in the Lost Belts that the twin masters of his traveled to. Which said meeting was after all that madness. He had at first thought she was the older sibling considering how mature she was and looked. But Artoria had explained that her original body when she was first summoned had been changed after defeating an older version of herself and absorbing the form somehow. Honestly, she and everyone else was still confused on why those happened from time to time with certain servants.
Anyways they got along very well upon the first meeting and got closer as siblings later on during the week which is when he learned that she was only a month younger then him. A fact that he still teased his fraternal twin sister about, that said he also had met and gotten close easily with his baby sister also named Artoria too. Though she went by Amelia by that point and unlike his more stoic, and calm sister. His baby sister was much peppier and cheerier. That and much more childlike with a hint of mischievousness at times which made sense since she was about twelve age wise.
That said he did learn that one day Amelia would be grown up too as apparently when his twin masters out of town relatives came in early on with Chaldea with their own servants. Including two once child servants now teens. It seemed the other child servants that came in later on also were slowly growing up. It might be not too soon yet, but they all would one way or another. Which worried Arthur a bit.
Not that fact his little sister would be an adult woman one day. No that he was happy for, but what worried him was how his sister would take this. As so far it seemed Artoria was in total denial on that fact. Mainly because she dotted and babied Amelia to no end. Not that it wasn't bad, but Artoria seemed to mother Amelia at times even before he came along. That and he swore Artoria would buy Amelia a chastity belt if she could with how much his sister wanted Amelia to stay the way she is now. Still Arthur knew they'd cross that road one day. Thankfully it wouldn't be for a while before Amelia starts to mature more. So for now, he'd enjoy this time with Amelia as his baby sister.
Anyways that aside today. Arthur was with her baby sister Amelia who was skipping ahead leading them somewhere. While with them were Lancelot, Gawain, Tristan, Bedivere and Gareth. They being the only ones in their group free to just hangout while they follow behind Amelia too. Since the others being Mordred, Percival, Barghest, Melusine and Baobhan Sith were doing something involving his sister, her friends being the six other originally summoned servants and the twin masters. He didn't know exactly the details but it seemed dire last he heard. Still Arthur had decided to just enjoy today, though he did wonder about Merlin and his mother/ guardian/ the female Merlin/ the lady that goes now by Maranda and loves to annoy her big brother Merlin's whereabouts.
Oh well Arthur had a feeling it wasn't anything bad. That aside he was enjoying the conversation between his knights at the moment. They never ceased to make any time of the day interesting.
"I still say that if Mash was given a sword to use as her primary weapon instead of that shield of hers. She would be more effective in combat. Galahad is part of her still, which in turn means she's part of me. So she should have the capacity to use a sword just a well as I had as a lad." Lancelot was explaining to the others as they had been discussing on how to help improve one of their new, yet not new and already members of the round being Mash now that they had the time to do so actually "Just give me a few minutes with her and she'll learn quickly. I know she will."
"No offense but that's bit of your ego talking my friend. Besides Mash does enough damage with her shield. Now if we can improve something. I'd say her attire needs some work. Even after she fully gaining Galahads abilities back. Her attire leaves ah… much to desire." Gawain exclaimed as Tristan, Gareth and Bedivere listening nodded in agreement
To be honest if had been anyone else had been wearing what Mash came with when she became a demi-servant and when she reached her full potential in the end. Gawain would have admitted, he'd probably had said nothing and admired it from afar. But Mash was kind like a niece to him and the others since they all considered each other family. So it was weird more so… that and the fact he knew Lancelot would have skewered him if he'd been caught staring ever at Mash in such a way.
"True… very true." Lancelot exclaimed as he was in total agreement with his friend. But that was because his protectiveness of Mash coming into play
"Personally, something similar to Gareth here would be fine." Bedivere chimed in as he patted his shorter friend's shoulder with a smile
"That's for sure. I don't want sound so... purdy. But I don't like how much skin is exposed on sweet little Mash." Gareth exclaimed as she loved the girl like a niece and found her so innocent even now "Not to even mention when we found Merlin's suggest for a Halloween outfit."
"Ah yes that one… didn't his sister Maranda have a part in that outfits design?" Tristan asked as he swore it was Merlin and his little sister who worked on that now thankfully scrapped outfit for Mash whenever they were able to celebrate Halloween… which had yet to be at thing amongst other holidays
"More like she was the true mastermind that woman." Arthur muttered hearing this though was unheard by the other knights as they all kept following a skipping Amelia ahead of them
"I believe so Tristan. Either way I remember how close Lancy here was to skewering those two. Even nearly went into that crazy berserker mode of his." Gareth answered as Lancelot sheepishly rubbed the back of his head
"No shame in friend. None of us cared for such an outfit design. Though didn't those relatives there at the time hate it too?" Bediveres asked now
"They did. I think they were the only ones to keep those two pesky mages in check after that. Especially the red, white, black and yellow themed ones. They seemed to dote on Mash just as much as they did with the masters." Gawain answered as everyone else took a moment before they remembered that too. After that he looked to Arthur ahead of them a little as he watched Amellia skipping still "My King I do apologize that we've excluded you and our young queen from this conversation."
The others nodded realizing this too. But Arthur just smiled back and waved it off as he hadn't minded just listening to them banter.
"It's fine. Besides I have to keep an eye on Amelia here anyways. Speaking of… " Arthur said looking back to the skipping form of his baby sister "Amelia."
"Hm… yes big brother?" Amelia asked as she turned around walking backwards now with a sweet smile
"Well I wanted to ask where you're taking us. I don't think this is a part of Chaldea that any of us have ever been too." Arthur explained as a few 'Yep', 'No idea' and 'Nadas' echoed from the others "I just hope this isn't a prank Amelia. You remember the last time you did one."
"Ugh yeah I know… I said I was sorry to big sister." Amelia replied back rolling her eyes and groaned at the ONE time she pulled a prank. Which happened to have her big sister be the victim of it by accident
"You did and she forgave you. But that doesn't mean me or her forgot it. You were just lucky that red liquid was paint and not animal blood. Not to mention your punishment after." Arthur stated though had remembered his sister was still pretty upset with Amelia when that happened. Even grabbing Amelia by the arm and dragging her off to her room before spanking her hard. If the cries of pain seconds later that echoed had been any indication
"Yeah… ehhh…. I still feel the sting" Amelia exclaimed as she shivered from the memory and the fact her big sister had grounded her for a whole month after. She sighed though and pushed those memories aside and smiled once more "Anyways no need to worry any of you. It's a room I'm taking you all to."
"A room my young queen?" Bedivere asked for him and the others as Amellia stopped, then the others followed in suit
"Yeppers. Here this letter will explain it!" Amelia happily answered as she pulled out a letter and handed it to Arthur who opened it as the others moved closer to see the letter too
"Let's see here. Ahem… 'To one youthful Queen Amellia Pendragon. Greetings you have been invited to participate in a grand event of entertainment. You may bring as many friends and family as you deem fit. Follow the directions at the bottom of this note and keep an eye out for small green arrows in the nooks and crannies of the walls. They will lead you to the room. From, a friend.' Huh that's interesting." Athur finished reading out loud. Then he looked to his baby sister handing her back the letter "Are you sure this isn't some kind of trap or lord forbid some elaborate prank?"
"The king is correct to worry our young queen. This could be just some ruse to lead us into some trap or something." Lancelot exclaimed as he at least was a bit on edge now as he looked seeing one of the doors near them have a very small and barely noticeable green arrow taped in such a way that no one would even bother looking in said direction unless given prior knowledge to do so
"Not to mention Amelia sweetie. But does anyone else find it a bit odd this room is in such a place that none of us have taken notice of until now." Gareth chimed in as she felt a bit creeped out now that she took a better gander at just how silent and well clean this part of Chaldea was "I mean I didn't think the base was THIS big. But to have an unexplored area is rather… unsettling. For all we know some creep wanted to get you alone and do icky stuff with you."
"Oh Auntie, Lancy. It's fine, sides that's why I brought you guys with me anyways because if it is a trap then we'll deal with it!" Amelia mused as that got a smile out of everyone else
"Kind words young queen. Truly kind words." Tristan said with a small smile "By the way how close are we to this mystery room?"
"Actually why do you think I stopped, aside from talking with you all." Amelia remarked as she pointed to a door on her right
The others looked seeing this and saw indeed it was the door they had to be at. Heck it even had three very small and barely noticeable green arrows taped to the celling pointed right at the door.
"Huh… well there it is." Gawain muttered
"YEP. Now then I'll go in first and you all follow. Also don't worry too much, I have Calibur still if things go wrong kay?" Amelia mused as the others took a moment looking to one another, before nodding that they understood "Good. Now then follow my lead people!"
With that Amelia took the initiative as she stood in front of the door as it opened for her. She then rolled inside as she landed on her feet and looked around. After seeing that this room was oddly decorated and had what looked like bathroom; and a kitchen along with a few other things. She straightened herself back up and felt at ease now more than ever.
"Hey ah, I think we're good actually. Come on in!" Amelia said as she saw the others poke their heads in for a moment. Then saw that Amelia was correct about it being safe as they all walked in, sheathing their weapons they had on them
"Huh… didn't expect this. Cozy." Arthur mused with a small smile
"That it my liege. That it is, but the question now is what we're going to-" Gawain began to say before suddenly the door closed behind them and locked "Okay maybe we spoke too soon."
"Ehh… did… did that just lock on us?" Gareth asked as she got a bit nervous herself now
"Yes… it did. But keep calm Gareth. We are knights of the round remember, we can handle whatever will happen." Bedivere reassured as he patted his friends shoulder as she let out a calming deep breath and smiled back
"Well I'm sure something is going to happen. Maybe if we… huh?" Amelia began to say before she noticed the laptop on the table near the TV that was installed in here pop open
Amelia flinched when she heard and saw this happen, the others took noticed seconds after. All of them staring at the laptop before Amelia with Arthur behind her went up first to see what this was about. The others following behind their king and young queen. Seconds later they all took notice of the laptop's screen displaying a message and read it to themselves.
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Dear Knights of the Round Table,
Yes, we know who you are and were hoping that young Amelia would bring most of you here. Now that said we have invited you all to watch a movie. Now I know most of you only dwelled into your grail knowledge on the basics and that includes at least the gist of movies. That's fine, but for now we hope you enjoy this movie being shown to you. Oh and don't think of trying to escape, trust us after the movie is done then you can go. It's only two hours and come on, let's be honest none of you had much to do today right?
So enjoy the movie and we hope you find today worth it.
From yours truly,
R-Team
P.S: Do not blabber about this to anyone after, this is a privilege for those selected for this and is a surprise. So again please don't tell anyone this once you're out of here. If you do, well we know where you sleep.
P.S.S: Ignore the last remark on the first P.S. My friend was trying to be funny and failed at it again, sounding more like a mob boss then anything. ('-_-)
P.S.S.S: Hi person from the first P.S. Ignore what the second P.S.S said, they have no sense of humor and should get one.
P.S.S.S.S: You take that back you jerk, I have a sense of humor. Just not yours you creepy edge lord! (v_v)
P.S.S… whatever: You little son of a… no never mind, you are a fool. You hear me, a humorless FOOL!
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New P.S: Please ignore the other two, they got at it and the rest of our team is cooling them down now. But please if you can, do not tell anyone this. We've told past groups we've invited that we will eventually make a meet up group for those who have done this before. But for now, please keep quite on this and enjoy. Thank you.
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After the group read that, they all looked at one another at how odd that had been. But none of them could sense any ill intent. As much as they could tell from text and the odd what looked like faces made at the end. Still, they looked to one another seeing what any of them had to say on this.
"Well…" Amelia began to say and waited to see who'd reply back first
"Well, if you ask me my young queen. I think this sounds fun, odd as it is. It seems others have done it so maybe it will be fine." Bedivere answered first
"That's good enough endorsement for me. I'm game!" Gareth cheered. Though noticed the others still seemed hesitant "Come on boys. Don't be such scaredy cats, besides the message was right. We don't have much to do today so why not?"
"Well…" Gawain said as he was pondering still if they should just try and force their way out or not. But he at least wanted to make sure the others were on the same page "Thoughts. Gareth, Bedivere and our young queen do make a point."
"I will go along with it only if you, Lancelot and our King here agree to it." Tristan answered his honest opinion on this situation
"Honestly might as well. We didn't have much to do today now that I think on it and tomorrow is when I'm busy anyways with Mash. You know father and daughter bonding." Lancelot exclaimed as he didn't like the fact they had been locked in here. But he wasn't against seeing his first movie either so he might as well
"Then if Lancelot is. Then I will, besides I can't disappoint my little sister can I?" Arthur mused as he patted the top of his baby sisters head as the girl giggled
"If our liege will stay. Then I shall too, that and to also keep our young queens spirits up." Gawain cheered with a thumbs up to Arthur who nodded back for the words
"Then I'll stay too. Now I guess we sit on the couch?" Tristan stated as everyone else shrugged but agreed with that being the next step to this movie watching
With that they all took a seat. Tristan and Lancelot on the right side of the couch, while Gawain sat next to Lancelot and Gareth was in the center. Arthur meanwhile was on Gareth's left while Amelia happily snuggled against her big brother like he was a pillow. Which Arthur didn't mind and smiled at how attached she was to him; and Artoria when she was around. Even if she acted at times like she didn't care much if only because she was still a near teen in age anyways so she was a bit rebellious.
Not even seconds later before the laptops message vanished and replaced was the number '5' in bold text white text while a green background that said 'Please Stand By' shined behind the bold numbering. Then it began to count down…
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5
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4
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3
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2
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1
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[PLAY]
It was a good few moments as the screen were pitch back as the movie began. The servants waited to see what would appear on the screen and a second later the first set of bold white words appeared. This one saying…
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[PYTHON (MONTY) PICTURES LTD
in association with MICHAEL WHITE
presents]
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Monty Python and The Holy Grail
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The servants chuckled for a moment at the title, considering what they dealt with when it came to grails. After that the title vanished and was followed by a sudden few hits of a drum, then it changed again showing the those who written and performed in this story like 'Graham Chapman', 'Eric Idle' and a few more as the next set of bold white texts that had the names 'Connie Booth', 'Neil Innes'. Followed by again a third set of these white bold words with a few names out of them being the likes of 'Avril Stewarts'…etc. This followed by a violin played into the mix of the drums playing.
Though as the next set of bold white words showed. The group of eight took noticed that some of the text itself was odd in what was written. Mainly as the next set of bold white wording appeared showing the many more names in smaller font. Now the words 'Also appearing…' showed with now what sounded like a xylophone being mixed in also with the music. Then more of these names popped up showing camera men and such that usually worked the lighting, etc, all of them.
But what was odder was the fact the group noticed in what could only be described as broken English. With a phrase that said 'Wi not trei a holiday in Sweden this yer?'. They found that odd but let it be as they saw again the other bold white text introducing the rest of the crew that helped with this film along with some more odder sentences. But they let it be again as they watched on before they showed the 'With special extra thanks to' with a semi-paragraph to read below which none did.
Another odd thing was when the next of mentions for the music, customs and such occurred. A small string of sentences staring appearing. The first of them saying 'A moose once bit my sister' and continued with 'No realli! She was Karving her initials on the moose with the sharpened end of an interspace toothbrush given by Svenge- her brother-in-law- an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian movies: "The Hot Hands of an Oslo Dentist". "Filling of Passion", The Huge Molars of Horst Nordfink"…
As the group read this and were utterly confused on what in the actual heck was going on. Suddenly the music that had been playing ceased and the bold white words with the odd subtitles vanished. Leaving the screen dark once more. Before a new set of bold white words appeared.
This one saying much to the added confusion got group here, 'We apologies for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible have been sacked.'. In their confusion, the group made some comment on this. As this was already getting weirds and they were barely two minutes into the movie for heavens sakes.
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"Okay… this is kinda of weird… really weird." Amelia murmured as she found these credits odd already. But kept her judgment for the rest of the movie on hold until it started, but again she did find this odd so far
"Hm I will agree somewhat on that. But I'm sure that it has it's reasons, besides I do find the moose explanation a bit amusing." Bedivere mused as he at least thought there was some reasoning behind this scene so far… well he hoped at least. Still he did find the story he read funny too so that made up for the slight oddness
"I don't. I could barely read half of that before it changed to the next set of lines." Lancelot huffed as he hated having to read, not that he couldn't but he hated having to read in such a short time with such a long-ish sentence. That and he never read a book unless he had to do so, so he wasn't the most book savvy one could call it
"Well that's what you get for barley reading as it was. You lack the skill to read in a fast pace my friend." Tristan mused as he and everyone else always knew Lancelot had an affinity to avoid books if so needed, heck Mordred read more than Lancelot here ever did willingly
"Please not this again… my sister already teases me enough at me being more of a meat head than anything else." Lancelot groaned as he swore his sister must have possessed Tristian for him to be spouting out the nearly same criticisms she was. He never knew one who looked so sweet and young could have such a sharp tongue on her… that and how blunt she was on some things and in the form of teasing him relentlessly too
"Well she's not wrong. You always did brute force many things in the past. Haha!" Gawain mused deciding to tease his friend some himself now and to totally not to vent just a bit on a rather critical criticism his own sister had on him and told him… constantly on… not that she was any better at times considering how much of a brute she could be during battle. But he wouldn't ever say that to her face. He was a brave knight, not a suicidal one
"Ha agreed. Remember when our friend here tried fighting off flock of geese after his bread." Tristan mused as he decided to throw Lancelot under the bus and vent a bit about his own sister teasing him relentlessly about that rather… embarrassing incident that though involved Lancelot, also involved him and Gawain too somewhat in the background
"How could I forget. He spent three hours fist fighting geese and swearing they were after his soul as witches in disguise. Then we found him up in a tree surrounded by three of them. That was way too funny!" Gawain exclaimed cheekily as in actuality that had been the result of Lancelot keeping Gawain safe for three hours straight thanks to Gawain himself having that witch in disguise belief
"I hate you both… so much sometimes…" Lancelot groaned as he would have corrected the two idiots of friends of his here. But he knew they'd just deny it by this point and decided to just let his fate be sealed considering the others hadn't heard this story yet
"Boy's behave. I remember a few things you two did that I'm sure EVERYONE would love to hear." Gareth sweetly if not with slight sternness stated as she knew quite a few things about Gawain and Tristan that would make for such good funny stories. She smirked a little when she heard a sudden 'Yes ma'am…' from Gawain and Tristan. Happy, she patted their heads "Good Boys!"
"Ever the peace maker Gareth." Bedivere mused as he was just happy things were kept civil even if it was just teasing
"That's our Gareth for you, be it the one I knew or this one here. Gareth was always the peacemaker." Arthur proudly exclaimed as he gave Gareth a thumbs up and smile at how proud he was of Gareth's usual affinity to calm a situation or possible one down usually with ease
"D'aw. You charmer!" Gareth thanked her nephew as she was happy that like Artoria aside from the stoic nature at times, her relatives were always so nice and supportive
"Hehe. Well funny banter aside guys, I still find this part weird." Amelia said simply as she found this all amusing now thanks to her friends, that said the other couldn't help but nod in half or full agreement with her as they continued to watch on
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Though as they did so. They quickly noticed a half start of more strange subtitles before once more the scene switched back to another apology. This one saying 'We apologize again for the fault on the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking the people who have been sacked, have been sacked.' It then went back to showing the mentions and it went swimmingly fine for at least for a few moments. Before the third mention now talked about moose's again.
Then the fourth sentence came and said something about moose's that went as followed, 'Large moose on the left hand side of the screen in the third scene from the end, given a thorough grounding in Latin, French and 'O' Level Geography by' then the name next to it was 'BO BENN'. Under that one was 'Suggestive poses for the moose suggested by…' with under that being 'Antler-care by…'.
But once more AGAIN, the text changed back to yet another apology that said now, 'The director of the firm hired to continue the credits after the other people had been sacked, wish it to be known that they have just been sacked. The credits have been completed in an entirely different style at great expense and at the last minute'.
Then the screen went dark for a few moments as the group watching were dumbfounded. Before… before the new credits appeared and dear holy father art thou in heaven was it horrible…. HORRIBLE!
It started with the sudden sound of the music slowly starting up before seconds after the screen went to a seizure procedure of colors and words for the rest of the mentions in these credits that were just as odd as the other ones beforehand. That mixed with new mariachi themed music.
You know the kind one would hear after waking up in bar when having one too many because you were celebrating your birthday. You say no you don't want any, but the peer pressure just goes on and ON. Then you drink and next thing you know you're in a Mexican themed restaurant waking up suddenly after ordering the breakfast burrito as the mariachi music goes on the background. That is what this music felt like!
AHEM….
Anyways the servants barely got the chance to even admire or cringe at this. As it was so sudden and painful that a few of them had obvious responses to well…. THIS.
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"AH MY EYES, MY YOUTHFUL EYES!" Amelia screamed as she covered her eyes at how sudden the intense flurry of colors affected her eyes, the other were not faring better though so at least she wasn't alone in this
"THIS IS ALMOST AS BAD AS WHEN OUR MERLIN WORE THOSE DIXI PANTS!" Gawain said covering his eyes as a similar pain coursed through them like when their Merlin. The male one thought it would be fun to just sport on a pair of short-shorts and walk around for the day in them. Something Merlin's sister would be able to pull off since they were made for a more feminine body type one could say. So, when he wore them…oh… oh it was horrible
"AHH, WHY DID YOU HAVE TO REMIND US OF THAT. NOW MY EYES HURT AND I FEEL SICK!" Lancelot screamed himself as he remembered that day and had been with his daughter. He'd saved her from seeing that sight quickly but suffered himself as he swore he heard so… SO much screaming that day after
"IT WAS LIKE AN OLD HAG FLOSSILING!" Tristan screamed from his usual calm tone. As he had suffered the worse alongside his sister when they came into viewing sight of Merlin in such attire then. Not to mention the fact he bent over to pick up a penny on the ground and well… they saw TOO much. Tristian still remembers his sister clinging onto him for some kind of safety with Merlin straightened himself back up before leaving… followed by many more distant screams
"I have no idea what they're talking about. Do either of you?" Gareth asked as she had no idea when this even occurred or the fact that it had
"I do but I wasn't there so I don't feel really affected by whatever imagery that memory gave those three." Bedivere answered as he was thankfully to have only seen that after math of said event. Mainly with helping out all the servants who were either screaming in horror on their knees, servants who had passed out or those servants who were on the ground crying like babies in fettled positions. He also remembered that's where a new rule of out lawing short-shorts being worn alone… a dark day that was
"Same." Arthur agreed also remembering that day and having then a good feeling that his Merlin has asked the male one to do so. Sighing he then focused back on his sister who's head he was patting while he covered her eyes still "Though I should have covered my little sister's eyes sooner here. I remember she was stuck in a fun house at one point and well… she did not like the colored mirrors."
"No more colors. No more colors of doom!" Amelia whined as that day in the fun house of colored mayhem would never leave her heart or soul… never
"Aw poor baby. It will be fine I promise you." Gareth chimed in as she pulled her baby niece into a hug as the younger queen whined yet felt better now
"Still I fear this is an indication of the movie ahead… I dare say we may have picked the wrong choice of what to do today. Oh and they're fine now." Bedivere said with a somewhat grim tone, before he noticed those most affected here uncover their eyes and rub them a bit
"My eyes…." Amelia whined some still even if she had uncovered her eyes by this point too
"Eh… well enough at least." Bedivere muttered sheepishly
"Personally I thought the music was nice at least." Arthur muttered himself. Before he and the others went back to watching the film before them
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(See, obvious…)
That aside. As the credits finally stopped and the servants went back to normal thankfully in a quick manner. The screen was dark, before the same dramatic yet epic drumbeats echoed. As the group now saw a new string of bold white text that said in a stylized form; 'England 932 A.D.'.
That caught the groups attention as it seemed their guesses on the movie's plot or at least era it was in were correct. Well okay Amelia and Bedivere were way more correct the other three. Still as the white bold text vanished the starting scene finally faded into sight for our audience.
It started off with some kind of wooden totem or maybe landmark, who cared. Anyways that and the grass plains that covered the land could barely be seen as thick fog surrounded the area. Birds chirped and the wind blew during this. Though it was silent aside from that. The group watched and waited to see what exactly was going to happen. Then they hear it. The clopping of horse hoofs.
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(Clop, clop, clop…)
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The sound was a nostalgic one for them all, as they watched the screen slowly zoom on what they assumed was the rider and his stead. Still again the sound was welcoming as back in their day aside from the rare pets being cats and dogs, etc. Horses were their best friends and now they would see one on screen for the first time.
The mighty, noble, majestic and beautiful… SON OF A BITCH!
It was just a bloody idiot. Avid one carrying a rather big backpack with a flag poking out the top, poor fella. But still a bloody fool who was smacking together of all thing's coconut shells in such a way that somehow it simulated the clopping of what should be a majestic horse. The only thing that went through the knights minds were 'SERIOUSLY!?'
Then came the one who was looking like a moron as he skipped in a way that simulated riding on a horse and a horse galloping. His right hand up like he was holding the reigns. Anyways they got a good look at the prancing dingus and they noticed unlike his probably indentured servant. He wore armor of a knight or well a somewhat crappier version of it if you asked any of the knights watching.
Still the man wore chainmail over his arms and legs from what could be seen. He wore over that a white sleeveless tunic that had gold accents around the hems of the skirt piece and arm holes. Around his waist was a belt and attached to the left side was a sheathed sword. He also wore gloves and boots, along with what looked like a crown with a chainmail vail around the back of the head. Most noticeable thing though was the sun emblem stitched on chest of his tunic. All in all this man seemed much to the servants worry, the king of whatever era this was and along the main character. They were already starting to regret agreeing to this.
But regret or not they watched on.
"Whoa there!" The king yelled as the group got a bit of a better look at his face. Seeing him a peach skinned man with a short brown, maybe ginger or mixed coloring beard and what looked like brown eyes, could be blue but honestly eyes are eyes
Still as the King halted himself and in turn his actually what looked like a squire now. Maybe, still as they stopped the scene changed showing ahead a castle on top of a green hill. It looked a little worse for wear but who are any of us to judge. Didn't help the image when crows cawed a bit. But then the scene changed back to the king who a second or so after motioned to move out once more. So they did, with the damn coconut clopping all the way down and up to the castle's door. Where they stopped when they saw a guard above spot them.
"Halt. Who goes there?!" The guard said loudly as the King and his 'stead' stopped
"It is I. Arthur, son of Uther Pendragon from the castle of Camelot. King of the Britons, defeator of the Saxons, sovereign of all England!" The King or now of ALL people, Arthur Pendragon the King of England answered
As the name was uttered, let's just say Amelia had well… the most sudden reaction to this. Oh yes she did…
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"No. NO THAT IS SO NOT COOL. That guy could be anyone, but it had to me and my brother here. That's a load of icky and stupidness. I swear I'll find whoever made this film and make them pay. You hear me pay!" Amelia screamed from at least in her viewpoint. The utter gull of this movie to make king Arthur the moron before her and her brother. Again at least to her this is what she felt, thought to be honest she was still pretty young in mind too so it was more likely she'd come to this conclusion
"Now, now Amelia. Is that anyway for a young lady such as you to behave." Arthur kindly scolded as he patted his little sisters back. Honestly he didn't mind himself, still at least he could do was be sympathetic to Amelia on this. Lord knows though how Artoria would have taken this, she already had a slight distain whenever her gender was brought up even now. Still he let that be as he patted Amelia's back while the younger sibling pouted against Arthurs chest "There, there. Pout some more into my chest if you must."
"I have to say. Never would I have thought I'd see our young queen get so angry. It rather frightening yet oddly adorable." Gawain whispered torn between being a bit scared at how angry the usually calm Amelia was or gush just a bit at how cute she was when she pouted. Truly a man torn between being a loyal knight or being a fanboy at the moment… truly a hard choice, pity thy Gawain
"Don't let her hear that. She'll just get more upset considering she wants to be like her older sister the queen. That said I can't blame her." Lancelot replied back in a hushed tone too as he wasn't as surprised by this. Mainly because he'd been the one of the only few to ever be in the same room as his King, now queen whenever she was angry. Mostly to make sure she wouldn't go overboard so again he wasn't as surprised
"Indeed, still I wonder if any of us will appear within the film itself?" Tristan exclaimed as he like Gawain found Amelia's pouting a bit scary yet really adorable too. So he had decided to change the subject to the movie again
"Personally I hope not, this film already is giving me a slowly growing headache." Bedivere murmured as he rubbed his forehead feeling a small headache already forming
"Yeah same…. I really don't want to know what I may or could be like in this movie." Gareth agreed as she kind of hoped she'd be left out. She already had enough self-esteem issues, she didn't need any more for God sakes
"Same…." Gawain, Tristan and Lancelot muttered in agreement. Though out of them all, for some reason Lancelot had a feeling he'd have a movie counterpart for sure
Still at the same time the knight's noticed Amelia was done pouting and sitting back up straight as Arthur had just finished giving her one last pat on the head with a kind smile.
"Now are we feeling better Amelia. I understand your… issues here believe me. But I hope you can keep a calm mind from here on." Arthur said as he was just glad his little sister could get her frustrations out so soon
"I am… but may I please say one more thing." Amelia replied back calmly before asking her brother her request. When she saw him a bit hesitant, she pulled out the big guns… the Amelia Lion Cub stare "Pretty please big brother!"
"H-H-H… Hnggggggg…." Arthur tries to resist. But it was no use thanks to the masters Great Aunt Yang teaching Amelia how to weaponize her cuteness sadly. Knowing he was defeated he sighed but still smiled "Hmmm…y-yes you may."
"Thank you big brother!" Amelia sweetly cheered giving her brother a peck on the cheek before sitting back down. Then standing up on the couch with a very angry face as she shook her first up in the air. Took a deep breath and then screamed to the heavens "PAY, I'LL MAKE YOU ALL PAY ONE DAY I SWEAR ON MY HONOR. RAGGGHHHHHH!"
To be honest this was like seeing a blood soaked lion cub roar into the night sky as they stand upon the dead bodies of their parents who somehow ended up being killed by a herd of elephants that just got a bit too close to. Maybe it was hit, maybe someone wanted them out of the way. But all in all Amelia looked like she was about to be night. Be the…. LION GIRL… ahem. Ah forget what you just read… no idea where this came from… yep….
Anyways Amelia after yelling to the heavens her promise for revenge and the feeling of slight utter dread to those who heard it since they knew Amelia would keep her word. The young queen sat back down sweetly smiling and kicking her legs even like nothing had just happened
"Ahem. I'm good now. Hehe." Amelia cutely mused as she followed by Arthur focused back on the scene before them once more
-"Scary… yet so adorable!"- Lancelot, Gareth, Gawain, Tristan, Bedivere and Arthur all thought as they couldn't help but almost gush at how adorable Amelia was making a death threat
Still like Amelia they too went back to watching the scene before them seconds later.
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Yeah, hell haveth no fury like a woman's… especially a mini version of a Heroic spirit like Amelia was.
That aside as a calm Amelia and friends continued on watching. They listened in on the conversation and were glad they didn't miss anything as again they were now REALLY curious on what everyone else or at least who was to be included in this film character wise. Would be like.
"Pull the other one!" The guard replied back not either in disbelief of a lack of one from the beginning when it came to Arthurs claim
"I am. And this my trusty servant Patsy." Arthur answered calmly yet stern as it seemed Patsy was some kind of servant after all. One who dressed the simialir to Arthur tunic wise at least as the scene changed to them and stayed on them as Arthur continued "We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join me in my court of Camelot. I must speak with your lord and master."
"What, ridden on a horse?" The guard questioned as the knights and little queen at least were happy that at least it seemed that the whole coconut thing wasn't going to be ignored
"Yes!" Arthur answered with little to no shame at that fact… which made Amelia cringe remembering a few times she was like that when she was first summoned
"You're using coconuts!" The guard argued
"What?" Arthur questioned like that was an odd thing to fixate on
"You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin'em together." The guard explained a gasped at how odd this Arthur fellow was so far and not even a minuet in to speaking with him
"So?" Arthur argued back like it was again an odd thing to criticize and with no shame in that fact. Then he continued "We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land. Through the kingdom of Mercea, through-"
"Where'd you get the coconut?" The guard questioned interrupting Arthur as to be honest to the servants. They thought that was a good question to ask considering Arthurs request and how he already seemed like a bit of a loon
"We found them." Arthur answered as if that was a good enough answer which it wasn't of course
"Found them. In Mercea… the coconut's tropical!?" The guard stated bewildered at what he was going through and hearing right now. Today had done a total one eighty on what he'd had expected to be just another day guarding the castle
The group listening already felt like they were losing any semblance of sanity they had left and wondered if this was actually happening as they just listened on with the scene playing out before them. Hoping this was just a small part of a much larger and hopefully less so far odd story.
"What do you mean?" Arthur questioned back as the group at least did their best to not facepalm at how stupid he was sounding already and not even a few minutes into the movie
"Well this is a temperate zone." The guard pointed out as again that made sense and brought up way too many more questions on where the damn coconuts came from in the first place
"The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plumber may seek warmer climes in winter yet these are not strangers to our land." Arthur recited again with little to nearly any sort of shame or reflection on how damn stupid this was to even argue about
Amelia by this point was kind of glad her big sister Artoria wasn't here. She could not imagine how irritated she would have been by this point already. That and maybe she'd destroy the room to escape. Her big sister could at times be a bit… erratic when it came to her more volatile emotions. She was just glad her brother Arthur here seemed to be taking it in… wait did his eye just twitch. Huh… maybe not, oh well. Anyways she continued to watch the movie alongside the others even if she felt her brain cells dying every second she did so.
"Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?" The guard asked as he honestly sounded like he had just heard it all thanks to Arthur
"Not at all, they could be carried." Arthur corrected. Though honestly that didn't really help his case on what oddness this conversation had brought
"What… a swallow carrying a coconut?" The guard stated as he swore he was going to jump of the ledge and kill himself if this went on, okay maybe not but still he was gonna ask for a two week break or something at least after today
"It could grip it by the husk!" Arthur argued and to be honest the group plus said author even writing this up. Wondered if this Arthur had ever even had any semblance of shame in the first place in his life
Said group of knights meanwhile had to say something at least to what madness was being spouted out by this mockery of King Arthur/ Chaldea King Arthur/ King Artoria/ Now Queen Artoria and Queen Amellia.
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"Okay... okay is... is this like some weird haze dream. I don't understand what any of this has to do with our era or how it's funny is that what it's supposed to be. Is that bad I don't find funny much so far?" Amelia asked as she felt like this was just some very weird fever dream honestly. That and she felt bad she wasn't finding this funny, entertaining a bit but not all that funny either "I feel like I'm being a bit too critical right now. You know?
"No worries. I also feel as if I'm in a hazy dream right now my young queen. So don't feel too... bad about that. Personally this scene is more curious to me at least. When you think about it. Could a swallow pick up coconut shell with its talons alone?" Gawain replied back to reassure Amelia. Though he also was really wondering and trying to picture the possibility of a swallow carrying a coconut shell all by its lonesome self
"Huh... now I'm curious too. I mean if you think about it, depending on a bird maybe. Probably if it's swallow though alone no way. Can't see one being able to do that." Lancelot stated deciding to put his two cents into this conversation
"So what about ten, twenty maybe could?" Gawain asked as he saw that as more of a reasonable guess, if not kind of funny one too
"Maybe but could be less too. We can only wonder my friends. We can only wonder..." Lancelot answered before sporting a thousand yard stare as he could see the imagines of the mighty coconut appear before him for a moment. Before vanishing as Lancelot let a single tear come down his cheek while he kept a stoic face "Coconuts…"
"Hm... coconuts." Gawain murmured himself as he simply nodded
"I… okay I think this movie is a haze dream… it has to be…." Bedivere said as he rubbed his eyes at what he and the others had just witness; and the strangeness of it
"Ha, maybe so Bedivere my friend. But personally I do find this a bit amusing. That said this topic seems to have brought the more studious side to two of ours at least." Arthur mused kindly as he was just happy Gawain and Lancelot were getting along so much better than before
"More like insane…" Gareth muttered with a small sigh
"Either way it does bring a good question. An amusing one too, that I do wonder on the real life possibilities." Tristan exclaimed with a small smile while Gareth sighed some more as she by this point noticed Amelia seeming like she was about to pass out from the stupid and began to rub the girls back
"Please stop. I don't think Amelia can handle anymore stupid boys." Gareth scolded a bit as she kept rubbing Amelia's back with a maternal love of sorts "Poor baby. Auntie Gareth is here."
"Auntie..." Amelia groaned quietly as she swore her aunt could embarrass her at the worst times, like now… thanks a lot Auntie Gareth
The others just chuckled before going back to watching the scene play out. Gareth and Amelia a few seconds later doing the same. Even if both women already were steeling themselves for the rest of this film.
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So despite the ever increasing dread of watching the rest of this movie. They watched on as the knights of the round here never yielded and this movie would just be another dragon to slay. Metaphorically of course because well you know… never mind.
"It's not a question of where he grips it. It's a simple question of weight ratios, a five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut!" The guard argued and that actual made a lot of sense if one thought on it
"Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here." Arthur mused as he decided enough was enough and that he needed to talk with the lord of this place
"Listen, in order to maintain air-speed velocity. A swallow needs to beat its wings 43 times every second, right?" The guard kept on though and was refusing to let this go. This was too stupid not to argue about and then simply gloss over
"Please!" Arthur pleaded as he was starting to regret coming here
"Am I right?" The guard replied back as he wanted an answer now
"I'm not interested!" Arthur stated as he was REALLY starting to ponder if he should just leave
"It could be carried by an African swallow!" Suddenly a second guard said coming up now having overhear this stupidity going on
"Oh yeah. An African swallow maybe, but not a European swallow; that's my point." The first guard replied back as now he was becoming engrossed with the conversation with his fellow colleague
"Oh yeah I agree with that..." The second guard agreed
"Will you ask your master if he wants to join my court at Camelot?!" A now somewhat irritated Arthur pleaded but it seem to fall on deaf ears now
Amelia at least seeing this couldn't help but say something along with maybe having a quick vent/ rant session she'd been wanting to have ever since all this madness had started during the early days of Chaldea. This movie finally gave her the excuse to do so.
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"HA, HA I SAY. Thats what you get for talking so stupid you moron. Talk stupid stuff and you get stupid result... UGH... this reminds me of our master out of town relatives back when!" Amelia screamed as she knew this movie would be the death of her sanity. Not to mention a hated habit from the masters out of town relatives that she like many had been force to endure through
"I thought you liked them Amelia. At least from what I heard they were quite kind and easy to talk with." Arthur mused considering he'd been a Lost Belt servant so he never actually meet the twin masters relatives that had been here beforehand
"I mean yeah they were but just... UGH. They had such a bad habit of talking suddenly about the most RANDOM STUFF. Like seriously it got so…. SO ridiculous at one point that I swear they had some kind of disease that made them do that. And don't get me started on the fact everyone here started to get into those types of conversation a while back and even now. I swear they infected us all at one point or another. UUUUUGGGHH!" Amelia explained as she didn't hate the masters relatives, honestly they were like family. Bu that odd little habit they had just grated her and many of the other servants during the Solomon issue
"You know now that she brings it up I do feel at times odd conversations did occur without us realizing or well realizing too late to stop it." Gawain added in as he did remember some of the odd conversations that would start out of the blue. Like one about apparently characters from some children show called the Smurfs
Apparently the female-female Da-Vinic or Lidia as she went by who was part of the out of town relatives group. Had brought up the fact with one of the twins great Aunts. He believed it was the one named Blake, which went by the lines he believed starting with Blake saying first and quote…
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'Come on Lidia don't be so stubborn. They have one female servicing a large group of males. That implies a species that lays eggs. That's simple logic!' With Lidia irritably replying back
'Oh my God Blake, you're crazy you know that. They're so obviously mammals it's clearly shown!' With then Blake angrily answering back
'Oh, please spare me. Lidia if that was the case she'd be in estrus 24/7 if she didn't lay eggs. That would be madness and her zone down there would look a train wreck of regret!' And then finally Lidia snapping then saying back
'Smurfs don't lay eggs for God sakes Blake, I won't tell you this again. I mean come on, Papa Smurf has a fucking beard and a dick probably. What else would they use them for aside from going to the bathroom and screwing. They're mammals. Fucking mammals!' Lidia had yelled then as it seemed her and Blake had been on this for a bit
.
Avid this happening during the whole sixth singularity and it took everyone to calm the two down. Mainly because this also happened when they were fighting off a horde of well Shades. Gawain being there right when he came to their side of things. So yeah the young queen had a point. Also it seemed Gareth had to agree seconds later with him… if only to vent for a moment herself for once…
"Oh… you mean like one or two between us at one point Gawain." Gareth said in very sweet tone all of sudden as Gawain frozen a bit as she went on "More specifically like the one time with us talking about our future together Gawain. When we fought off a horde of werewolf. Is that what you mean Gawain?"
"G-Gareth not in front of the others!" Gawain pleaded as his face went bright red a bit
"Oh ho... what's this my friend. Getting busy lately?" Lancelot suddenly remarked as he gave his friend a pervy smirk while Gawain did his best to ignore him. Not like the others helped much either, seconds later
"No shame in that my friend. It's only natural considering how you two here have known each other for so long." Tristan kindly exclaimed as he gave Gawain a smile and was happy for his two friends. Even if Gawain wanted to just hide in a hole now
"Agreed. We wish you two the best ahead. That said what an odd time to talk about such things." Bedivere joked a bit even if was also happy for his friends, Gawain swore sometimes he just wanted to punch Bedivere for how unintentional he was with his teasing at times
"I know right. Still thank you boys, at least you seem not to be chicken to talk about it." Gareth thanked her friends at their kind words before giving Gawain a slightly narrowed side eyed "Unlike some."
"Gareth please... in private... please." Gawain pleaded to his… well to a girl he had relations with at some points and wasn't totally not dragging his feet when it came to full commitment… not at all
"Of course 'DEAR'... of course..." Gareth simply said a little upset as she averted her gaze from Gawain with a pout. Gawain just sighed knowing that now he'd be sleeping on the couch tonight… great
"Hm... the troubles of love is universals it seems." Bedivere mused as he could only hope Gawain had a good plan to get back into Gareth's graces after this
"Hm..." Lancelot and Tristan hummed as they couldn't but agree, and pity Gawain. Poor bastard but hey at least it seemed someone would finally reel him in and who better then Gareth
"HAHAHAHA, FOOL!" Amelia meanwhile chanted as it seemed after her rant she went back to mocking movie Arthur and not even hearing anything else said right now. Good… maybe… maybe… who knows
Arthur just kept quiet during this as he decided to enjoy the banter and he was happy for his friends. That and happy to see Amelia was enjoying the movie too, at least in her own way at the moment. Still now back to the movie.
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So as everyone calmed down or just let issues be for now. They went back to watching the movie yet again, like always… (Look I can only say this enough time in different variations alright. So can y'all give me break?)
"But then of course African swallows are not migratory." The first guard mused
"Oh yeah..." The second guard muttered as he hadn't thought of that
"So they couldn't bring a coconut back anyway..." The first guard continued on as he sounded a bit as if he was pondering now
By this point Arthur and Patsy looked to one another. Before Arthur nodded his head for them to just leave. So they did as the clopping of coconuts started up. The scene having been mainly switches from Arthur to the guards so far, now changed to a side view of Arthur followed by his 'Stead' leaving into the fog that covered the land still.
Though the scene did not seem to change yet as the guards kept just talking and talking about the bloody sparrows… ugh.
Once more the group began to discuss at least on what they had just witnessed and in the first scene of all things of a movie that wasn't even past nearly seven minutes so far into the movie itself.
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"So... this has already been an odd little movie so far huh?" Arthur asked sheepishly if only to brighten the mood so far even if barley worked as they all looked at him for a few moments before deciding to answer back
"More like stupid if you ask me big brother. More like really stupid..." Amelia whined some as she was truly regretting this day now, that and wasting everyone times she believed
"Well there was maybe a funny moment or two for me at the randomness of this film so far. But I'll admit it's still a little too stupid already." Gareth agreed with her niece, even if she also admitted there was slightly a funny moment or two for her so far in this first scene of the movie
"Well stupid or not. I have found some parts of this scene and the introduction itself a bit funny at least. What kind of humor would one call this again?" Gawain admitted before he pondered on the genre of this film, he swore sometimes the grail knowledge could be a jumble of information
"Dry humor maybe or hm... I think it's called parody or something called British humor. Honestly the grail knowledge on humor isn't that much surprisingly." Tristan answered as he swore himself that it was one or at least two, or maybe even all three of these genres. Though he believed the term 'British Humor' wasn't an official term
"Really. That's a first of me hearing that... still I just hope the next parts won't be as hmm… odd, funny a bit I'll admit, but again odd." Lancelot stated as he could only take some much stupid, odd and just plain weird before he usually tried to book it out all the way back to Nope Village. Where his nope wife, nope kids and nope dog that looks more like a wombat waited for him in all the nope glory of a nope son of a nope…
"We can only hope and see if that's the case friends. But I'm sure it will be fine, this is only been at least seven minutes since we started watching it." Bedivere reassured despite his own disbelief in his own words. Honestly this looked like it was going to be a film that would test whatever sanity they had left ever since being brought back into the world of the living as heroic spirits
"Yeah totally. Bedivere got it right, so no frownie faces people. Let's see what else this movie has got for us!" Gareth cheered as she at least believed Bediveres words and did her best to raise the spirits of her companions once more
The others mainly being Lancelot, Tristan, Gawain and Amelia half heartily just murmured in agreement even if they too had their doubts ever slowly growing more and more. They truly had a feeling this movie would not be for them.
"Hm I do hope you are correct. I do hope so." Arthur whispered as despite his own iffy feelings with the film so far by the first scene alone, he did like it somewhat too
"Oh I'm sure. No need to worry, auntie Gareth guarantee it!" Gareth reassured with her trademark smile and a thumbs up to her nephew
With that they all went back to watching the film, all of them waiting for their dread and possible expectations to be proven wrong. That and hoped that Gareth's words would be enough of a reassurance.
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Unfortunately said reassurance from Gareth would somewhat go to waste as this next scene would prove soon. As it began without a moment of notice as the sight of a dead old man being thrown over another dead body on a cart of all things was seen. Though for the group here, even in this new era they had a good idea what this was. And that guess was easily answered seconds later.
Why because he scene began to zoom out showing the cart being pushed from behind by one man and another two pulling from each handle in the first. While next to the cart pushers was a man. Most likely a Mortician, walking on the right side while hitting a cow bell loudly.
Help cement the knights guess on what was happening when the Mortician spoke moments later.
.
"Bring out your dead, bring out your dead, bring out your dead, bring out your dead!"
.
Each time that was said, it was then accompanied by a clang of the cow bell. Though as that had went on the scene showed some villagers crawling on their knees. Others fighting over scraps and all in all it hit a little too close to home for the group when they came upon such scenes of misery back in their own time.
They yet again began to speak a bit to one another at this scene.
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"Huh... well didn't expect this. They even got the mortician correct. Well that's something if not a bit different from the last scene." Lancelot surprised a bit exclaimed. For a parody or whatever this movie went by genre wise, he had to admit that they got the misery part of plague stricken towns right. Aside from maybe the occasional street murders and crying, begging peasants pleading for help whenever they'd ride past them during their own mortal lives
"Ehhh... I don't like this already. Ehhh..." Amelia groaned as even if she knew this had been a reality at one point, didn't mean she had to like it or even have anything to do with it be it by memory or film
"Same. Ugh I got already bad memories from whenever I had to go through things like this. Movie or not it's not fun to see again." Gareth added in as she shivered a bit from few of the more extremely unsavory memories back then when it came the infected towns
"Well I'll agree it wasn't a very nice sight to behold. But that was life back then for us, though I do agree with Lancelot. This is quite the tone shift from before, could this movie become more serious maybe?" Gawain wondered. Mainly as a vein hope that it would be so, because if not then this was a waste of an hour or two of their spirit lives
"Possibly. That would be interesting to see how the movie would end up if it does go a more serious route." Bedivere agreed. As honestly anything would be better than the last scene in his own opinion even if it had been somewhat funny to him
"That or it's just a semi-serious moment. Which seems more likely honestly." Tristan exclaimed as to him that seemed to be the case, not everything had to serious in tone the whole way through as even moments of amusement came into their old lives every now and then
"Don't ruin this hope for us..." Lancelot and Gawain groaned glaring daggers at Tristan who sheepishly rubbed the back of his head
"Now, now I'm sure we'll see sooner or later. No need for any of us to get upset." Arthur firmly if not in his usual kind manner stated. A quick enthusiastic 'YES MY KING!' from Gawain and Lancelot echoed as Arthur was happy that he could avert a possible argument
"Good boys." Amelia mused before focusing back on the scene playing before them and sticking her tongue out "Still icky scene...real icky. Bleh."
No one said a word after, but most agreed with Amelia's simple if not accurate thoughts on a scene like this so far. Still they did wonder if this would be more serious now or if it was just for this scene or a snippet of this scene.
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So as the knights watched on they saw a villager come up the cart that had just been set down for a moment. The man coming up with a dead old man slung over his shoulder.
"Here's one." The man said calmly and treating this just a like it was another day… which honestly could not be disputed
"I'm not dead!" The dead or now alive old man yelled as the group was surprised a bit by that, though Lancelot for some reason kept in a snicker
Mainly because he was wondering if this was an in-law joke or just a joke about wanting to get rid of a bothersome parent. That or just getting rid of someone in general. But again he didn't laugh if only to not be scolded by their little queen who didn't seemed to find this funny one bit. Bless her angelic little heart.
"What?" The Mortician asked as this wasn't a usual thing that happened. Not saying that it didn't happen but it was rare… ish
"Nothing, here's your nine pence." The man replied back calmly and pulled out the nine pence for the old man to be taken
"I'm not dead!" The old man argued on
"Ere. He says he's not dead." The Mortician chimed in as it was pretty clear that this old man was spry and alive… at least for someone his age of course
"Yes, he is." The man firmly assured like he was total and probably ignoring the old man
"I'm not!" The old man yet again argued
"He isn't." The Mortician exclaimed not amused by this point
"Well he will be soon, he's very ill." The man explained in slightly pleading tone like he was begging the Mortician to just take the old daft bastard
"I'm getting better!" The old man stated
"No, you're not. You'll be stone dead in a moment." The man argued back looking at the old man for a few moments, before focusing back at the Mortician while stilling having his hand out with the pence in it
"Oh I can't take him like that. It's against regulations." The Mortician argued as he didn't want to lose his job over this, he had a wife and kid to feed
"I don't want to go in the cart!" The old man yelled in a slightly panicked tone
"Oh, don't be such a baby." The man replied back to the old man in a annoyed tone
"I can't take him..." The Mortician explained
"I feel fine!" The old man cheered trying to sound as alive as he could to avoid being thrown in the dead pile
"Well do us a favor..." The man pleaded a bit trying to change the Morticians mind
"I can't." The Mortician repeated once more even if he could understand the man's plight some
"Well can you hang around a couple of minutes. He won't be long." The man asked as he hoped that maybe that would do the trick
"Naaah, I got to go on to Robinson's. They've lost nine today." The Mortician exclaimed as he was a busy man and this transaction was already taking his time up
"Well, when is your next round?" The man asked hoping it wouldn't be too long as he could see he was taking up the Morticians times
"Thursday." The Mortician answered
"I think I'll go for a walk." The old man stated as happily as he could
"You're not fooling anyone y'know." The man argued back getting more annoyed by the old man. Before looking back to the Mortician "Look, isn't there something you can do?"
"I feel happy... I feel happy." The old man began to say loudly
Though as he did the Mortician had ponder on a memory of his old batty mother in law. How he had wanted to rid her and just like that he knew what he had to do. So looking back and forth for a moment to see if anyone was around or more so paying attention. When he saw none, the Mortician then whacked the old man as a 'WHOP!' echoed. The old man letting out a grunt before going limp.
"Ah, thanks very much." The man said as he was happy that the Mortician was willing to bend the rules a bit here as he placed the body on the cart
"Not at all. See you on Thursday." The Mortician replied back moving to the back of the cart to fit the now dead old man's body so it wouldn't fall off
"Right." The man simply said as it seemed this really was like a weekly thing
Though as the scene played out, the servants were half- half on if this was funny or not. Mainly because of Amelia and Gareth not seeming to like the scene at all, then again neither one of them cared for mean spirited things. Even if it was meant as comedy. They had words to say for sure and needed to say them now.
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"Hm... that wasn't nice at all. Comedy or not that was just... just mean. Hm..." Amelia whined with a sad look as she crossed her arms not finding the last scene funny one bit
"It's okay I feel the same. Sure some people it might be funny and maybe I'm being a prude again. But eh... that wasn't funny at all honestly. Just... mean like you said Amelia." Gareth agreed as she patted her nieces shoulder and wondered how or why anyone in their right mind would find stuff like this funny; that or the least bit entertaining. Like Amelia had said it just felt very mean spirited
"Well it was a little funny ladies... I'll admit I'd probably have done the same in his position. Though I'd probably use a mace or something." Gawain remarked as he honestly didn't see this as mean spirited, more of dark humor is all
"I'd say using a sword would be quicker." Tristan added in smirking as he too didn't have an issue here and found it a bit funny also
"True but wouldn't that make more of mess. You know with all the blood and such." Gawain replied back as he decided to give his own insight of how he would have handled killing the old man
"Oh that is true. Hm good point, good point." Tristan agreed as that did make more sense than his choice of old man killing weapons and he'd been covered in enough gore; and blood at times in his mortal life to want to avoid that now a days
"Ew you two are so mean and gross!" Amelia said as she found the boys conversation gross and just mean spirited too. She never would understand boys and their love of violence at times
"Seriously. I swear you two were always so odd when it came to this stuff. At least Bedivere here isn't as bad as you guys." Gareth exclaimed rolling her eyes some at her fellow knights words and was glad that Bedivere was the golden boy amongst them in this particular subject
"Wait what about me?" Lancelot asked as he wondered why he'd been left out of this
"Shush you. We all know you'd do this kind of start just for the chuckles." Gareth slight teased yet scolded too since Lancelot had always been the violent prone of their group at times
"Ehh... your words hurt Gareth... hurt." Lancelot muttered clenching his chest plate a bit as Gareth's words struck deeper than any sword had
"Well to be honest if I had to do what we saw in the scene. A quick knife to the back of the spin would work well I guess." Bedivere remarked smiling just a bit as Gawain and Tristan nodded in full agreement there. While made another 'Ew' sound again and Gareth mouth was agape at hearing that
"Ah come on I was vouching for you!" Gareth yelled as she couldn't believe that even mister goody two shoes was putting his opinion here on the scene
Arthur meanwhile just listened for now as he had no real opinion on the actions just played before them. So he would watch on and wait to see if anyone had more to say before he said his piece.
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So as the scene went back on for the group, they suddenly heard THAT... they heard the God forsaken coconut clops.
Not even as second later from the right side. Out came Arthur and his 'Stead' clopping behind as the passed by the Mortician and the man. Heading down and out to the other side of this village.
"Who's that then?" The Mortician asked curiously
"I don't know." The man answered back as he and the Mortician took a few looks at Arthur, and his 'Stead' clopping away from them
"Must be a king." The Mortician guessed suddenly
"Why?" The man questioned on why and how he came to that conclusion
"He hasn't got shit all over him." The Mortician simply answered at the rather obvious answer there
Amelia and Gareth didn't understand what any of that was about or if it was supposed to be funny. But it apparently it was as they heard the held in snickers from all the boys with them as they were doing their best to not going into laughing fits all of sudden. A few seconds later and they were calm once more. The girls still confused let it be and wondered what was even the joke.
Anyways back to watching the film, the next scene started suddenly and showed two peasants digging in the ground. In the background was Arthur with Patsy alongside him moved past from the left side to right of the screen. Following the two as they went down a trail.
Then a change in the scene showed the back of Arthur and Patsy. Arthur having slowed down near a cart with what seemed like an old lady in ragged robes pulling it.
"Old woman!" Arthur yelled out to get the old woman's attention
"Man!" The Old or maybe not so old man answered back glancing at Arthur who was nearing his left side now before looking back ahead
"Old Man, sorry. What knight lives in that castle over there?" Arthur apologized before going back to his original question as from a distant blurred out a bit was a castle. Wasn't his fault though he mistaken the man for an old woman
"I'm thirty seven." The man suddenly said as the scene changed showing a front view of the man and Arthur still doing his fake galloping
"I… what?" Arthur asked as he hadn't expected for the man to say his age all of sudden
"I'm thirty seven. I'm not old!" The man argued back seeming a bit irked with Arthur now
"Well, I can't just call you Man'." Arthur tried to explain and that was fair to the group watching the scene. Even if it was a bit rude too they had to admit also
"Well, you could say Dennis'." The man or Dennis barked back as he really seemed irritated now at how rude he believed Arthur was being
"Well I didn't know you were called Dennis'." Arthur tried to explain in his defense. Really he had no idea of the man's name and meant no offense
"Well, you didn't bother to find out did you?" Dennis snarked back with a bit hostility
"I did say sorry about the old woman,' but from the behind you looked-" Arthur once more tried to explain. But Dennis this time cut him off
"What I object to is you automatically treat me like an inferior!" Dennis exclaimed angrily
"Well, I AM king..." Arthur said as he had a feeling he made an enemy of Dennis
"Oh king eh, very nice. An' how'd you get that, eh?" Dennis said as he finally stopped letting his cart down before looking back at Arthur who stopped and by extension Patsy while Dennis ranted "By exploitin' the workers… by 'angin' on to outdated imperialist dogma which perpetuates the economic an' social differences in our society. If there's ever going to be any progress-"
"Dennis, there's some lovely filth down here. Oh…how d'you do?" A woman who was obviously being played by a man who made his voice higher pitched said crawling in the dirt towards Dennis, before she noticed his company
"How do you do good lady. I am Arthur, King of the Britons. Who's castle is that?" Arthur introduced himself as Dennis made his way next to the woman now
"King of the who?" The woman asked confused
"The Britons." Arthur answered back
"Who are the Britons?" The woman questioned as she had no idea what Arthur was going on about
"Well, we all are. We're all Britons and I am your king." Arthur explained as it was matter of fact and no one could deny it
"I didn't know we had a king. I thought we were an autonomous collective." The woman admitted as Dennis was now on the ground with her and already taking some of the dirt into his hand
More importantly what the heck was she talking about and why was this a thing now. At least the group of knights watching wondered that as they waited to see how this scene would play out.
"You're fooling yourself. We're living in a dictatorship. A self-perpetuating autocracy in which the working classes-" Dennis began to explain in another rant it seemed before the women cut him off
"Oh there you go, bringing class into it again." The woman complained as it seemed Dennis spout this all the time
"That's what it's all about if only people would-" Dennis tried to argue, before Arthur this time decided to cut him off
"Please, please good people. I am in haste. Who lives in that castle?" Arthur asked once more as he really just wanted some answers. Not a lesson in different governmental body types apparently and especially not from peasants of all people
"No one live there." The woman answered plainly
"Then who is your lord?" Arthur asked as that made no sense at all
"We don't have a lord." The woman yet again answered like it was simple
"What?" Arthur said very confused by that now, as that really… REALLY made no sense to him
"I told you. We're an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week." Dennis interjected suddenly and began to explain it all, at least from his view point
"Yes." Arthur just said in agreement to speed up this odd conversation
"But all the decision of that officer have to be ratified at a special biweekly meeting." Dennis went on stopping with… whatever he and his lady friend were doing with the dirt; and focused on Arthur fully for the moment
"Yes, I see." Arthur said a bit more irritated as this was going on the lines of himself being mocked by this dirt peasant of all people. Who was once more doing whatever he was with the dirt
"By a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs but by a two-thirds majority in the case of more-" Dennis in a louder tone began to say which really irked Arthur as he found these notions silly
"Be quiet. I order you to be quiet!" Arthur ordered as he just wanted Dennis to shut up by this point
"Order, eh who does he think he is?" The woman remarked as she and Dennis weren't too fond of Arthur it seemed that or just didn't care much who he was, probably both
"I am your king!" Arthur repeated once more as he swore he was gonna… no… no keep calm. These two were just two stupid, loud mouth dirt peasants… mainly Dennis… stupid Dennis
"Well, I didn't vote for you." The woman exclaimed
"You don't vote for kings." Arthur explained as it was just that simple if you asked him
"Well, 'ow did you become king then?" The woman questioned as Arthur felt a migraine coming on. But ignored it to educate the woman before him
"The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite. Held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water signifying by Divine Providence that I, Arthur was to carry Excalibur." Arthur explained looking up to the sky a bit now. Thinking back on the fond memories of the Lady of the Lake while angelic music played lightly in the background for a few moments. Then the music ceased when he focused back on the dirt peasants "That is why I am your king!"
Arthur of Chaldea groaned loudly as his knights and little sister heard easily before he in a rare moment ranted himself now a bit at how it was not as simple as the movie made it out to be.
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"Not exactly how it went big brother?" Amelia asked patting her big brothers back as he slumped down some with his face in his hands
"Oh… OH no for a fact little sister." Arthur said muffled at first before he sat back up with a rare thousand yard glare pointed towards well the wall as he continued on "No for a FACT… I mean yes I did pull out the sword from the stone. That happened sure, but what the stories never told anyone is all the paper work, people I had to meet, alliances formed and meeting that had to be done in between before anyone. ANYONE even accepted me as king, not to mention the arch-bishop when he heard about me and the trials I had to bloody go through!"
The other watching justifiably got a bit nervous this had not been seen by any of them… so yeah. Still they at least whispered to one another.
"It seems our King had a very different beginning then our Queen." Gawain muttered as he was surprised at how angry their king was with this one particular thing
"Yeah. Like really different, didn't everyone just accept Artoria when she declared herself King of Britian back then?" Gareth asked as she swore on her parents graves that was the case. She even remembered the messengers announcing it and everyone just cheering afterwords
"They did from what I remember when rumors came around. No one seems against it and honestly happy about it." Bedivere answered as he knew for a fact everyone at that time was just happy to have a ruler that seemed to be Gods chosen for them
"Oh yeah. I remember myself, sure a few were iffy on it. But for the most part our Queen was fully accepted." Lancelot stated as he had been there, avid dealing with those who wanted to talk with their queen then king after pulling the sword out. Still aside from a few hecklers and those who seemed scared, everyone else had seemed more than happy to accept Artoria then
"Not to mention when the church fully supported our queen back then as when she ruled as King. Then again I find it too odd that our king had issues considering our Queen was disguised as a boy back then thanks to Merlin's magic." Tristan added in as the others found that odd indeed and wondered why the actual male Arthur had issues when the disguised female Artoria had barely any issues
"Speaking of and I can't believe I'm asking but after hearing that Merlin's magic could make Artoria fully a pesto male for a while and I mean 'FULLY'. BUT… did she and Guiny ever…" Gareth finally asked as she had wanted to so badly. But never found a good time to do so, until now that was and it was understandable to ask too honestly
"No. From what Guinivere told me though married in the eyes of the lord. They never loved each other like 'THAT' more like good friends. Though she had also told me that if our queen had asked her to lay with her and bear child, she would have if only because of her respect and understanding for it. Which our queen never did. That might be why she was more willing with my advanced when she had shown some interest back then." Lancelot answered honestly as he remembered clearly why he had been willing to have relations with Guinivere back then. Mainly because he had tried to stop her when she tried to lay with him the first time, only for her to well explain… still didn't lessen the issues that arose afterwords when their relationship had been outed
"Though I'm still not happy with how that all played out. Now that I think on it more, it makes sense why she ended up bedding you Lancelot. She still had needs like anyone else." Gawain said as even if the whole issue had caused much suffering. Being summoned to this era had given him time to realized why it may have occurred in the first place. He did hope one day Guinevere would be summoned as a servant. He had and did see her as a good friend. So he wanted to apologize to her for everything. One could hope and he still did
"Indeed. Some of us have more control, others not but that aside. Back to the main point but I wonder how our Kings own start went if from what we heard before conversing is any indication." Bedivere asked to bring the conversation back to main point even if the answer and the ranting in the background gave a clear answer there
"If anything not good…" Tristian simply answered as he and the others focused back on their ranting king
"And don't even get me started on how many times I had to stop the rumors about Merlin and I. Those went on forever and ever, and ever and ever. What made it worse was the woman was basically my mother anyways which made it so disgusting!" Arthur ranted before he sighed and slumped some seeming to have lost the steam to rant anymore thankfully
"There, there big brother. It will be fine, it's all in the past so again don't fret. Honest…heh…eh…" Amelia sheepishly and in her own was tried to reassure her brother, as she patted his back once more and hoped that would suffice for the moment
"So… we don't ever bring this subject up again around the King?" Bedivere asked the others as they all just stared at the king and young queen still
"GGGRRRAAAHHHHH!" Arthur with one last burst of energy screamed to the heavens. Before slumping back against the couch as Amelia just sheepishly smiled
"Nope." Tristan, Lancelot, Gawain and Gareth all quickly agreed on
"Good just wanted to make sure." Bedivere muttered before he and the others went back to movie watching
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So after that rather… awkward if not tense moment of ranting, they all noticed the scene before them playing out still. None of them though decided to comment anymore on this scene. Mainly for Arthurs sake so he could start to just forget his rather apparently hellish accession to becoming King of Britian.
"Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony." Dennis began to say loudly and sternly
"Be quiet!" Arthur demanded as insulting what he remembered as a fond memory was pushing it
"Well you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!" Dennis went on with his rant/ explanation
"Shut up!" Arthur once more demanded as insulting the Lady of the Lake was really pushing his tolerance of the loud mouth before him
"I mean, if I went around sayin' I was an empereror just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd put me away!" Dennis went on
"Shut up. Will you shut up!" Arthur yelled as he had enough and walked up to Dennis angrily before grabbing then lifting him up to his feet
"Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system." Dennis said like his point had been proven
"Shut up!" Arthur screamed once more while shaking the man a bit and throwing back on the ground before repeating the process as he had it up to here with the loud mouth Dennis
"Oh. Come and see the violence inherent in the system. HELP, HELP I'm being repressed!" Dennis screamed as other peasants were gathering around now hearing all the commotion
"Bloody peasant!" Arthur yelled past his wits end now with the loud mouth peasant named Dennis and let him go finally before making his way back over to Patsy
"Oh, what a giveaway. Did you here that, did you here that eh. That's what I'm on about. Did you see him repressing me, you saw it didn't you?" Dennis said to the crowd of peasants gather the man who was playing the victim card it seemed… maybe, who knows honestly
All aside from Amelia held their tongues at even talking about their own sadly similar kind of experiences when dealing with peasants like Dennis had been. If only for plausible deniability that any of those memories were nothing more than merely bad left over images of nightmare. That and so they wouldn't have what was mostly likely a lot repressed memories of those times from surfacing back into their minds.
Not that one could blame any of the knights honestly I mean who the heck would want that, really give me like five. No three people who'd want to remember that and I will show you a lairs. You hear me… LIARS with their stupid pants on fire and I hope they burn down in their houses with their families in them too damnit all!
Ahem. Anyways back to the main focus…
Now for the group, the next scene started. Showing Arthur doing that stupid fake horse galop and Patsy behind clopping the coconuts together down a trail in a forest.
That went on a bit more as oddly quick scene changes to men fighting were seen which surprised the servants a bit as they watched on, before they would see Arthur and Patsy still traveling now across to the right of the forest trail.
It went in a bit more as it would show Arthur and Patsy before changing to the fight. Which was between two knights, one in green armor and another in black armor. By the end of it the scene had changed again showing the two fighting still as from a distance Arthur with Patsy could be seen watching this go on.
Then the scene went back to the fight showing the green and black knight sharing blows for blows at each other. A few dirty blows, swipes, a nut kick and then mace attack by the green knight at a one point towards a fallen black knight who threw the man over his arm. Followed by a block of another attack with the mace before being thrown to the side. All while Arthur and Patsy watched this go on, to finally showing the black knight back on his feet with his sword. Before the green knight charged at him with a sword over his head and with a battle cry.
Then finally came the killing blow as the black knight had thrown his sword and somehow the blade hit right through the eye slit killing the green knight as a ungodly amount of fake red blood squirted out. The green knight falling to the ground dead as the black knight moved over to pull his sword out of the now dead green knights skull.
As that had occurred. The servants watching were a bit impressed at the fight cartography. Then they began to once more talk on a few things now a few about the scene itself so far.
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"Well I have to say this is rather nice fight scene. Reminds me of some of my own fights with an opponent." Arthur happily said as he did remember a few battles with skills knights back in his mortal life. Sure they wanted to kill him, but hey they made it well paced and enjoyable in the end. Heck a few even got close to beating him. But again he always remembered and honored those battles and the opponents who fought them
"That it does my King. Then again I didn't train that much with the sword, but I do remember watching the other do so and this is pretty similar to those training drills we used back then." Tristan mused as he could appreciate this movie duel considering it remined him of the days he would relax and just watch the others practice. The good times back then
"I still say you need to train more with the sword Tristan, one of these day that your bow of yours might not save you." Gawain exclaimed as he knew Tristan was capable and that his bow could be used for melee IF needed, but he still worried though
"True. But that's why I have my meat head friends here, to keep me safe as my meat shields." Tristan joked in a nonchalant matter of fact tone with even a smirk and shrug
"Thanks…." Gawain replied back as he honestly couldn't tell if he was being funny or serious or maybe even both
Gareth and Amelia who'd just been listening for the time laughed a bit at the banter between their boys. Glad to see that even despite the movie so far, they could at least keep each other's spirits up the best they could.
"Pff, nice to know how you think of is." Lancelot mused with a chuckle of his own. Before focusing back on the main point beforehand "Still this is a good scene I'll agree. Though I wonder if this knight is a rouge knight of something, the one in black I mean. Most knights never sported that color and those who did. Well we all remember."
Everyone else takes a moment before nodded, well aside from Amelia who never dealt with anyone like that. Then again she was a version who had been still a young maiden still in training so there was that.
"Hm. That we do. That we do, I wonder though how this our movie Arthur will deal with this." Bedivere simply stated as everyone else nods in agreement
Then like usually they went back to watching the scene play out and wondering how it would unfold in the end.
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After the rather interesting conversation. The group went back to watching the scene unfold and right now they saw Aruthur followed by Patsy behind him make their way over to the now still as a stone black knight. Who was just standing still as he had his sword tip against the ground and his hands on the pummel like a silent guardian of this place or something along those lines.
"You fight with the strength of many men sir knight. I am Arthur, King of the Britons…. "Arthur began to say. But noticed the black knight didn't seem to respond at all to the name. But Arthur though a bit surprised went on "I seek the finest and the bravest knights in the land to join me in my Court of Camelot."
But again no reaction to what was said. Arthur felt a bit awkward now and even confused. The servants watching felt kind of the same way as that was not normal behavior, even back in their time. Still as they watched after the long-ish pause between words, Arthur speak once more.
"You have proved yourself worthy, will you join me?" Arthur said with a slight frown when no response came. He'll admit this was a rather disappointing turn of events "You make me sad. So be it. Come Patsy."
And as Arthur was about to pass by the black knight with Patsy. Suddenly the black knight held his blade in the way of Arthurs path. The servants knew this gesture well and it wasn't a good one. Usually it meant either 'I want to fight you' or 'Try it and die'. Neither was good and the group had a feeling this black knight was not the friendly type… which was kind of obvious since he iced the green knight beforehand. So yeah… duh.
"None shall pass." The Black Knight loudly and sternly made clear
"What?" Arthur questioned as he found this a first in his life as king so far, he hoped it would be the last too
"None shall pass." The Black Knight exclaimed sternly once more
The group watching all had to admit, the Black Knights reminded most of them of a few opponents of two that were as brave and stubborn. Not willing to back down or move. But those memories were few in between and not worth bringing up. So they went back to watching the scene play out, interested on how the movie Arthur would handle this situation if it got violent.
"I have no quarrel with you, good Sir knight, but I must cross this bridge." Arthur said as calmly as he could. Sure this man was odd, rude too but he didn't want to kill the man either
"Then you shall die." The Black Knight said plainly like he just hadn't threatened the king of their lands
"I command you as King of the Britons to stand aside!" Arthur demanded now as he was nearing his wits end already with this odd man
"I move for no man." The Black Knight proclaimed as Arthur was now convinced this man had a death wish. Very well if he did, then he would pay with his life
"So be it!" Arthur said as he pulled Excalibur out ready to duel the Black Knight who got his own sword ready once more
As the servants watched they were again rather impressed with the fight scene, that and the fact the movie Arthur was a skilled enough fighter; and seemed to not even be giving much effort as he dodged a few swipes easily. The Arthur watching was rather happy seeing this.
Still as the fight went on with Arthur dodging and parrying a few more blows. Even hitting the black knight in the back of the helmet with Excalibur's pummel. The fight ended up with the Black Knight charging Arthur who dodged but this time swung his blade as suddenly the Black Knights arm was chopped right up from the shoulder as the fake blood spouted out. After that the two stopped as Arthur cleared his throat.
"Now stand aside, worthy adversary." Arthur stated sternly as he respected this man enough to let him be now, even with one less arm. The Black Knight though oddly looked at his arm then back at Arthur
"'Tis but a scratch." The Black Knight said with such reassurance and defiance of the situation at hand now, and ignoring the fact it was SO not just a scratch
Yet again the servants watching suddenly had a wave of memories come back to them at people so simialir to the Black Knight in the movie. These memories were so intense they all almost passed out from it on as the feeling of dread to having dealt with such people as these back then came back to them. But they kept strong, still it was all thanks to this movie that they were slowly regretting watching. Still they continued to watch on and hoped things would get better somehow.
"A scratch. Your arm's off!?" Arthur argued at the sheer audacity to make such an obviously false claim, his damn arm was ground for God sakes
"No it isn't." The Black Knight answered after taking a moment more to look at his wound then Arthur, in a bit of a childish manner at that
"Well what's that then?" Arthur demanded pointing right at the now bleeding exposed muscular and freshly sliced flesh that once held the man's arm which laid on the ground. There was no way this man could be THAT delusional
The group watching felt even more memories flood their minds of fools and stubborn opponents from the past. Memories they had so wanted to be bleached away for God sakes. Still after like a half a second more, they all got most of their bearings back. Then they watched the scene played on and did have to admit this scene was still a bit amusing if not a bit too close to home too when it came to the idiocy.
"I've had worse." The Black Knight exclaimed. Lying through his stupid lying teeth that was…
"You liar!" Arthur straight up argued as apparently yes. This man was full of it and was way too stubborn to admit he had lost an arm, that again was fully on display on the ground
"Come on you pansy!" The Black Knight screamed charging Arthur suddenly with his sword in hand
But Arthur yet again dodged the attack and like before. Took this chance to now cut the right arm of the Black Knight clean off from the shoulder. As the arm landed Arthur knew that this man must now admit defeat. He had no arms.
"Victory is mine!" Arthur cheered before kneeling down. Then began to pray to that God himself for the assistance here "We thank the Lord, that in thy merc-"
But Arthur was cut off mid prayer as suddenly the Black Knight let out a battle cry before he kicked Arthur on the right side of his helmet knocking him over. Then after began to actual kick Arthur over and over again while he was down. By this point the group and movie Arthur wondered if this man had any sense in him in the first place of if he really bought his own hype THIS much. Neither answer was honestly settling.
"Come on then!" The Black Knight demanded kicking Arthur a few more times as the man looked back up at the delusional Black Knight
"What?" Arthur questioned as he got back up now while the Black Knight was hopping side to side a bit like he was somehow still able to fight… without arms… against a man with a sword… bloody moron
"Have at you!" The Black Knight yelled as Arthur sighed and decided to just try and talk with the man
"You are indeed brave, Sir knight, but the fight is mine." Arthur exclaimed with his back turned from the Black Knight now
"Oh, had enough, eh?" The Black Knight of all things taunted. Hoping to Arthurs right as the King looked back to him
"Look you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left." Arthur said now past his limit to deal with a moron such as this
"Yes I have." The Black Knight argued… seriously
"Look!" Athur yelled pointing right at the arms as the Black Knight looked before focusing back on Arthur
"Just a flesh wound." The Black Knight stated as he kicked Arthurs backside now. Man denial is a fickle mistress ain't she…
"Look, stop that." Arthur demanded as his temper was starting to flare up
"Chicken, chicken!" The Black Knight mocked kicking Arthur two more times
"Look, I'll have your leg." Arthur threatened hoping that would make the idiot back off. But one more kick and Arthur finally had enough "Right!"
Seconds later the servants watched Arthur swing Excalibur and take the Black Knights right leg as it flew off and the fake blood squirted out. A quick change showed Patsy hiding behind a tree watching this madness and even flinching at the sight of it. The servants felt the same by this point as the scene went back to Arthur and now the one legged Black Knight.
"Right, I'll do you for that!" The Black Knight threated once more while hopping on his last remaining leg
"You'll what?" Arthur said at how outlandish this was becoming. Didn't help when the Black Knight yelled 'Come' ere!' and began trying to well just bump into an annoyed Arthur who was barely even phased by the pitiful bumping "What are you going to do. Bleed on me?"
"I'm invincible!" The Black Knight yelled bumping against Arthur again before hoping back
"You're a loony." Arthur straight up pointed out now as that was the only sane answer to what was wrong with this nearly limbless tart
"The Black Knight always triumphs. Have at you, come on then!" The Black Knight screamed in defiance of whatever logic was being said as he started to bump against Arthur again whole rolled his eyes a bit. Then Arthur cut his last leg off with one swipe of Excalibur as the now limbless Black Knight now sat on the stumps that uses to be his legs. He took a few looks at his limbs before back at Arthur sheathing Excalibur "All right, we'll call it a draw."
"Come Patsy." Arthur simply said already making his way past the limbless loony while Patsy followed behind seconds later
"Oh, oh I see. Running away then. You yellow bastards, come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!" The Black Knight snarled like a beaten rabid dog
But Arthur now back in his galloping motion and Patsy clopping the coconut shells simply ignored the man and went on the merry way.
As this scene began to fade to black. They knights waited for a few seconds as the scene went black again. Then faded back to an image of what they assumed was a monk who was chanting with other monks if the slight echo's heard indicated anything.
Though they did groaned a bit when they saw the Monk suddenly smack his face with wooden board that had a painted golden cross on it as they chanted "Dona eis requiem, Pie Lesu Domine' over and over again. Then the scene began to zoom out showing that yeah other monks were in a line behind the first one as the moved down a line through a town, the last monk carrying a flag pole.
But as that occurred and the servants finding this scene also very odd like most of the others so far. Suddenly they heard someone screaming 'A witch, a witch, a witch. We've got a witch. A witch!' which ended up being a village man with a farming tool in his hand with other villagers pushing someone who must have been this so called witch, some saying 'Burn her. Burn!' and just the usual witch burning stuff. All of them going to who knows… oh never mind.
Yep it was clear-ish now as the scene after changing a few times with the mob of peasants and their captive. Now changed showing a blue themed knight with a mustache and with a helmet that had the barred face plate lifted up seemingly tying something to a bird before letting it fly. That and another scene change showed the villagers still yelling the usual. Then stop near where this knight was. Said knight standing upon a podium of sorts.
"How do you know she is a witch?" The Blue Knight questioned
"She looks like one!" One of the villagers yelled out
"Bring her forward." The Blue Knight ordered as the villagers did so and….
The servants kept quiet as they saw the villagers push up a blond woman with a metal tin cap, a fake long nose and wore a brown witch like tunic placed over her white dress was pushed forward to the Blue Knight.
"I'm not a witch. I'm NOT a witch." The 'Witch' argued as she stood back up moments later as the Blue Knight inspected her
"Uh, but you are dressed as one." The Blue Knight exclaimed as she CLEARLY looked like one. It was SO obvious… right?
At this moment the knights began to have memories that almost made a few of them bleed out their noses. Memories from their own experiences back when they were alive and dealing with how stupid some of the peasants were in some villages. Still they watched on as the supposed witch said something in her defense.
"They dressed me up like this." The supposed witch answered plainly and not amused one bit. Then again makes sense considering a bunch of idiots just dressed her as a witch
"Ugh we didn't. We didn't!" Another of the villagers argued even if they didn't sound too convinced themselves and it was pretty obvious. The supposed witch and the servants watching this scene played out hoped that Blue Knight was smart enough to realize this
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Oh… Oh you sweet fools you all….
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"And this isn't my nose, it's a false one!" The supposed witch explained as the Blue Knight touched and lifted the fake nose up. Before letting it down having a look that he wasn't surprised by this
"Well?" The Blue Knight asked the crowd of peasants seeing where this would go now
"Well, we did do the nose." The villager that had started this answered a bit shyly
"The nose?" The Blue Knight questioned as he knew that wasn't all
"And the hat." The same lead villager answered shyly, before getting his fire back "But she is a witch!"
"We burn her right. Yeah, yeah !" The rest of the villagers began to yell again and getting riled up like they had at the start of this
"Did you dress her up like this?" The Blue knight questioned yet again. As he would admit that if not then maybe this woman was a witch even if not the more stereotypical one of course. But a witch no less
Some of the villagers answered. Some saying 'Yes', others 'No' and a few 'A bit's'. Heck one of the villagers even pointed out she had a wart. The Blue knight taking a look, but either didn't see it or saw a wart that was just some clay or something thrown onto the woman's face.
"What makes you think she is a witch?" The Blue Knight asked as he wasn't seeing the Witchy-ness from this woman so far
"Well, she turned me into a newt!" A villager accused as some of the others looked at him, alongside the Blue Knight. A few of the servants in the group watching felt their eyes twitch as those memories of their own time with idiots started to come to light once more
"A newt?" The Blue Knight mused as the man before him did indeed NOT look like a newt or even have traces of ever being newt
"…I got better." The same villager answered after a few awkward seconds of silence. The same few servants face palmed at how stupid that sounded and even more repressed memories of idiocy rose back up in their minds sadly
"Burn her anyway!" Another villager suddenly screamed as this yet again riled everyone else up
"Burn. Burn her!" The rest of the villagers screamed out in their mixed frenzy of calm and then want for a burning. Damnit all, they missed the days when questioning a witch burning was NOT a thing like now… oh those were the good days for them
Though for a moment at least the scene changed showing Arthur and his stead Patsy arriving but staying in the sidelines to see how this would play out while addressed the crowd.
"Quiet, quiet. Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a witch." The Blue Knight ordered as the scene changed back to him, with a few of the villagers asking 'Are there?', 'What are they?', 'Do they hurt?' and 'Tell us, tell us!'. The Blue Knight was all too happy to answer this "Tell me, what do you do with witches?
The answer was the obvious 'Burn them!' and such. But the Blue Knight just smiled as he went on explaining and the servants watching wondered where he was going with this.
"And what do you burn apart from witches?" The Blue Knight asked on as that was rather odd to ask but… okay. Still the answers were 'More Witches!' and the more sensible one 'Wood!'. The Blue Knight seemed pleased by the second answer and went on with whatever he was trying to say. So, why do witches burn?"
A long paused occurred for the villagers who thought it over. But as that happened, every servant realized where this was going and couldn't help but loudly groaned at what was about to be said….
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.
AGAIN!
UGH!
GOD WHY?!
FREAKING IDIOTS!
IT'S GREEN TOWN ALL OVER AGAIN!
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"W-What, why are you all groaning all of sudden?" Amelia asked surprised by the sudden reactions from her knights and brother
"It's… let it be young queen, if only to keep your sanity safe… please…" Tristan pleaded as he unfortunately was now reminded of Green Town and dealing with their demon problem that ended up being just a clan of raccoons stealing their stuff. But he'd been stick there...for twenty days trying to explain to the morons of Green Town that the raccoons were just animals not demons
"Wait what does that mean?" Amelia questioned as she had an odd feeling there was a few interesting stories behind those cries of anguish
"Please young queen… let it be… you're too pure to know our pain here…." Lancelot pleaded too. As like Tristan he and the others were reminded of their own time with idiots. Like for him being stuck a whole month trying to convince a town to change their currency and practices after a many compilates from other neighboring villages. Wouldn't have been so bad if only to haven't been a Town of poop worshiping idiots that used said poop as money too... he can still smell it even now...
"But Lancy..." Amelia began to pout before Gareth cut in
"No but missy or your grounded. Now let it be, trust your auntie on this sweetie. You…do… NOT…want to know what we know…." Gareth sternly if not with concern scolded. Shivering a bit from her own memories of a towns with idiots. Mainly the Geese Cult that almost sacrificed her because some daft old tart was scamming them and acting as if was speaking God's commands. Which just so happened to be through a Geese that lived near the village in a pond. She still has nightmares of that day and the frustration of having to try and convince them they were being scammed. Worked out in the end, but still...
"Hmf… yes auntie… meanies." Amelia pouted once again as she really was starting to get annoyed at points with how much they babied her at times
"We do apologize dear young queen. But we'll make this up to you somehow. Promise." Bedivere promised as his own memories of an idiotic town was when he had to investigate a heretical sighting. Turns out it was just some man trying foreign recipes and learning then to make better food in general. Took five days to explain to the villagers that... five whole days with those idiots...
"Finnnneeee… but you better do so in the form a lot of like tea time or something." Amelia demanded as the men at least dreaded that considering she always made them wear frilly hats... Gareth meanwhile was more than happy to comply there as she clapped a bit in a giddy manner
"Of course dear little sister, of course that can be the payment." Arthur reassured with a sheepish smile to his little sister who smiled back in triumph that she got some tea time out of this
Though Arthur too remembers dealing with idiotic peasants too sadly. Mainly for the fact he dealt with a cult of... ugh... Lemon Worshipers, a rather large cult to be exact. Details are a bit of a blur, but all he remembers is them barging into his throne room and demanding that he step down a ruler as they found the cure for death itself to give eternal life and enlightenment. Turns out it was a super concentrated lemon juice mixed with lord knows what else in jar. That was shared amongst all the lemon Cultists there. Then they ended up buying alive from the inside and well it was a messy; and traumatizing day after that... the cleaning though... shivers...
Before anymore could be re-traumatized more with the memories though. They all just went back to watching the movie. Amelia herself just happy she was getting teatime out of this.
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Still as the servants let out one more groan, accepting that this was going to be part of their day for now. That and most noticing Tristan twitching a bit oddly. But letting it be for now, they watched on at the idiocy about to spouted.
"B…'cause they're made of wood?" One of the villagers answered after the long pause finally
"Good!" The Blue Knight praised at the deduction as the crowd muttered in agreement as that made sense to them before The Blue Knight went on "So. How do we tell whether she is made of wood?"
"Build a bridge out of her." The lead villager suggested first
"Aah, but can you not also build bridges out of stone?" The Blue Knight countered as the villagers realized that was true. The Blue Knight continuing with his explanation though "Does wood sink in water?
"No, no." The lead villager answered back
"It floats. It floats!" Another villager brought up as the crowd started getting riled up again
"Throw her into the pond!" The lead villager said loudly as the crowd shouted 'The pond!' as they once again were riled up… sheesh talk about unlimited stamina these ones
"What also floats in water?" The Blue Knight brought up though as he was happy the crowd was slowly getting it, but he needed to help them some more
The group still watching felt even more of their soul leave them and brain cells off themselves as they heard the answers that ranged from food like bread and apples. To rocks, bottles of alcohol, gravy of all things and to even freaking churches and lead. CHURCHES AND LEAD… the servants though knowing this was a comedy or supposed to be wondered a lot more now if this is how the modern world viewed their time as for real. If so… that was rather hurtful.
"A duck." Arthur from his spot finally said loudly as the wave of moronic answers ceased after that as everyone looked to Arthur in awe and 'Ooohs' at such a smart answer there
"Exactly!" The Blue Knight cheered happily, before looking back to the villagers "So, logically..."
"If... she.. weighs the same as a duck, she's made of wood." The lead villager said as it came to him quicker the most of the others
"And therefore…?" The Blue Knight asked leaving it an open ended question for the villagers
"A witch!" The lead villager yelled at the sudden realization of this line of questioning and the conclusion that would prove the woman here was indeed a witch. The rest of crowd cheered as one man even said 'Here's a duck. Use this duck!'
"Very good. We shall use my largest scales." The Blue Knight exclaimed as he leaped down from his podium and lead the now cheering villagers with the supposed witch, and the duck to the scale
The next scene happened fast as the villager and many more noticing the commotion circled around the large handmade scales. As both the supposed witch and duck were placed, the Blue Knight ordered two of the men to remove the supports which they did with hammers.
As the group watched their eyes began to twitch again when they saw somehow… someway. The woman actually weighed the exact same… as the duck. The EXACT SAME WEIGHT… as a duck. Everyone else began to scream 'WITCH!' and 'BURN HER!'. Heck even the accused woman had to admit that and quote 'It's a fair cop.'.
That made at least Gareth yell for a moment 'NO. NO IT IS NOT!' while the other agreed though Tristan seemed even more twitchy now despite his calm look. After that the woman was taken by the villagers to be burned alive. Though as they all made their way off. Movie Arthur had made his way up to where the scales was, the Blue Knight deciding to speak with the gold plated man a bit.
"Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?" The Blue Knight asked. Though the servants watching swore that if any of their more science centric friends hear that line, they'd most likely have had blown a gasket or maybe a laugh. Either or to be honest
"I am Arthur, King of the Britons." Arthur answered proudly
"My liege!" The Blue Knight said in surprise and respect as he knelt down to the man
"Good Sir knight, will you come with me to Camelot, and join us at the Round Table?" Athur said in a stern yet kind tone as he offered this Blue Knight a chance to be part of a greater group
"My liege. I would be honored!" The Blue Knight answered as he was felt deeply honored to be invited to be part of such a group
"What is your name?" Arthur asked and was happy that the Blue Knight had accepted
"Bedivere my leige." The Blue Knight or Bedivere answered. Though the servants all flinched and looked to their Bedivere who though was smiling seemed… off now
"Then I dub you Sir Bedevere, Knight of the Round Table." Arthur proclaimed as he knighted Bedivere to his Knights of the Round Table officially
The scene the changed showing a book. Showing on the left the image of Arthur standing and Bedivere kneeling. While on the right green stylized text that was under an image of a green goose… dragon… flying thing showed saying 'THE BOOK OF THE FILM'. Before any of the servants could strike up some banter on what they had just witnessed. The narrator spoke.
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The wise Sir Bedivere was the first to join King Arthur's knights, but other illustrious names were soon to follow.
Sir Launcelot the Brave, Sir Galahad the Pure; and Sir Robin the Not-quite-so-brave-as-Sir-Launcelot who had nearly fought the Dragon of Agnor, who had nearly stood up to the vicious Chicken of Bristol and who had personally wet himself at the Battle of Badon Hill; and the aptly named Sir Not-appearing-in-this-film.
Together they formed a band whose names and deeds were to be retold throughout the centuries, the Knights of the Round Table.
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The next few moments the book pages were turned by a human hand. One showing a cleaned shaved man in black with a chainmail headwear over him that played Sir Lancelot. The next a young medium lengthy messy haired man playing Sir Galahad. Then a side view of the ginger haired, mustached man playing sir Robin who apparently was not so brave as two more page turns showed picture of him being scared and then dragged away. Most likely by Aruthur and the others when they first found him to have him become part of the Round table, that or the chicken. Then oddly of all things a baby laying in the armor and clothing of knight. Then the human hand was covered by… a gorilla hand suddenly… why?
The servants watching all almost screamed. But decided to not do so if only to prevent them from fully accepting the reality they were in now. Sure the movie had it's good points and even funny points so far even if for them at least in was few in between. But they also just didn't seem to have the mindset to fully embrace the utter insanity of this film, again not the filmmakers fault. Just a them issue.
That said they did feel like whatever sanity they had left was clinging to a slowly dying lifeline and screaming for them to stop if only to prolong said sanity's death. Heck Tristan almost seemed to have start twitching all over his body a bit then calmed down to the others relief, while Bedivere was able to keep a rare rant from happening with himself. Everyone one way or another decided to simply let things be for now and keeping watching on the scene ending.
Which it did, but this time the scene itself didn't even go to a dark screen like earlier. Instead it switched to the next scene of the now formed Knights of the Round Table with Arthur and Bedivere talking up front while the others followed behind. All of them doing that stupid fake riding motion as the coconuts just clopped on and on from their 'Steads'. Though the starting conversation wasn't helping with the knights assessment on this movie any more than before.
"And that my liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana-shaped." Bedivere exclaimed holding up his face plate with his right hand as most of the knights watching almost face palmed at that very sentence
"This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedivere. Explain again how sheeps' bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes." Arthur replied back with curiosity. Though the servants were really starting to get the idea that everyone in this era thought they were all morons back then. Parody or not… actually that kind of explained some of the few staff members reactions to them the first time they crossed paths
"Oh certainly sir." Bedivere exclaimed seeming more than willing
But thankfully before anymore idiocy and before anymore of the servants brains cells could off themselves. The movie Lancelot cut in.
"Look, my liege!" Lancelot exclaimed pointing ahead as the scene changed showing a large castle on a hilltop
"Camelot!" Arthur said first with a smile
"Camelot!" Galahad said next happily as the scene changed to him
"Camelot!" Lancelot said now. The scene switching to him seconds later before it changed to one of the 'Steads'
"It's only a model." The 'Stead' said dismissively
"Shhh!" Arthur shushed the 'Stead' before looking back to his knights "Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride... to Camelot!"
A second or so of them doing their fake galloping again showed. Before suddenly a… a bloody damn musical of all things started and so abruptly too.
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We're knights of the round table
We dance when e'er we're able
We do routines and parlour scenes
With footwork impecc-Able!
The scene quickly changed to four knights singing up close to the screen as jolly festive music played sudden. Then changed showing a group of knights standing somewhere in the castle like choir as they sung holding their hands together or holding instruments before another scene change showed at least seven knights getting up on at table. Before yet again switching back the choir of knights still singing.
We dine well here in Camelot
We eat ham and jam and spam a lot
We're knights of the Round Table
Our shows are for-mid-able
Then the scene still on the choir for a few more seconds, changed yet again showing the knights who were getting up on the table. Now dancing merrily, before once more for the love of god in this oddness. But it showed the choir now playing instruments, most sitting down and one standing.
Then once more back to the dancing knights as one of them even kicked a servants walking by with food before being kicked in the face. Falling over and dropping the food that looked to be bread. Then it showed a side view of this scenes of two knights singing some lines as a bird flew past them and the dancing knights for a moment. Before going back to showing the dancing knights kicking stuff off the table from how chipper they were.
But many times we're given rhymes!
That are quite unsingable
We're opera mad in Camelot
We sing from the diaphragm a lot!"
As this song went on a lot more oddness came. From showing the choir back to being a choir and singing, then more knights dancing like mad men in another scene to back to the choir again. Even one going to his knees as he pulled curtain as some of the rubble and dust fell off from that.
Then some more oddness occurred. As it showed now in a new scene the dancing nights moving downwards on a table that corned into another table while still kicking off food and drinks by accident.. maybe. Then another scene showed a strung up man chained by his wrists listening to the faint music as he clapped to the rhythm only for a change back to the dancing knights who now stopped before jumping up and down a few times on the table itself.
In war we're tough and able
Quite indefatigable
Between our quests we sequin vests
And impersonate Clark Gable
It's a busy life in Camelot
I have to push the pram a lot!
Some more dancing followed by one knight using wooden spoons on the helmets of four other knights like drums. Before smacking the head of a passing by servant and knocking the man out cold. To a new scene with four knights on their knees as a few more came up dancing along with animals and ugh. So much more oddness from more dancing, animals to the choir where one of the men let out the last lyric in a deep-ish tone and the madness was evident of movie Camelot.
A small quick montage of the madness added to that, before finally it changed back to Arthur, Lancelot, Galahad, Bedivere and Robin.
"On second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place." Arthur simply said as the other knights and the servants watching all agreed on that part of sensibility
Without much more the movie cast of the knights of the round skipped galloped away once more. Though as this did, the group like so far felt a need to say a few things on what they had witnessed.
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"Ha… ha okay that was a good one." Arthur said getting a fully genuine laugh out of this scene and from the movie for once
"Heh yeah. Imagine if our Camelot's were that jovial?" Gareth remarked giggling some at the mere thought of their Camelot doing song and fancy routines
"Actually my little niece is a good singer last I heard her. Big brother is here too, especially with those so called oldies." Amelia mused talking about Mordred who referred to her as Auntie Amelia. That and remembering Arthur singing some of those old tunes the masters would listen to form time to time like 'Dear Hearts and Gentle People' and , 'Orange color Skies'
"Well I wouldn't say I'm THAT good Amelia." Arthur bashful replied back as he rubbed that back of his head not thinking he honestly was that great of a singer in his humble opinion
"Oh stop my king. We've all heard you sing a few tunes here and there from that thing called a radio you kept in your room when you first came here. You we're pretty good." Gawain reassured his king. Everyone else nodding in full agreement there as they too had caught Arthur singing from time to time
"I personally liked your rendition of that song called 'My Way' you sung in the Lost Belt you came from." Bedivere chimed in kindly
"That was a good one. Though like Amelia said. I too also remember Mordred singing pretty good herself, some song that was called 'Say so' or something along those lines." Lancelot added in as he'd never heard her sing until that day and she was rather angelic oddly enough
"No way you caught her doing that. Oh I remember hearing her once when we were still alive and couldn't help but coo at how adorable and angelic she sounded!" Gareth exclaimed fawning over her technically great niece at how much she wished Mordred sung more
"Huh… note to self. Keep an eye on Mordred to catch her singing if possible…" Tristan muttered to himself meanwhile as now he had to catch Mordred singing one day, he just had to
"I want to hear that one day from Mordy. Oh you know maybe we could have a karaoke night. That would be so fun!" Amelia suggested with a cheerful tone as the others just nodded in agreement and found Amelia's ever so peppy mood adorable
Still they went back to watching the film once more. Glad at least they found one acned so far they found genuinely and fully amusing.
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Once they were done with what they wanted to say then. They went back to watching and noticed the film was still focused on the knights galloping instead of changing scenes. A few more seconds and they noticed watching that the scene changed to a front of view now. Showing a light appearing above the group of knights who looked back up.
Why well no reason aside from GOD speaking to them as the scene changed showing a light skinned bearded man wearing crow as a light shined behind his head and the clouds parted for him. The odd thing was the God image here was an illustration made to look like it was talking. Much to the servants slight irritation here considering their were all Christians. Maybe not to Jeanne levels, but still this felt a bit mocking to a few while others did find some humor in it.
"Arthur. Arthur, King of the Britons!" God said in a deep-ish tone as the scene changed back showing the knights of the round kneel down on the dirt before God. Though God seemed to get annoyed by this "Oh, don't grovel. If there's one thing I can't stand it's people grovelin!"
The servants watching all suddenly began to ponder a bit if God, the one they believed in felt the same as the movie God was depicting. But they all without even having to say a word, made quick decision to leave it be as their chat would have opened a whole can of worms. Not to mention if a certain few servants, one a bubbly saint, another a punch happy saint and a third a motherly pope woman would have heard them. Somehow… like always. It would have ended in smacked hands, whacks to the heads or a punch. Maybe even all three, still they had gone back to watching the scene play out.
"Sorry-" Arthur tried to say only for God to cut him off
"And don't apologize. Every time I try to talk to someone it's "Sorry this" and "Forgive me that" and "I'm not worthy"." God said irritably, before he noticed Arthur and his knights in tow covering their eyes now. Which only irked God off even more as it seemed these guys missed the point "What are you doing now!?"
"I'm averting my eyes, O Lord." Arthur answered as God swore he was gonna figure out who caused his followers to be this way, so help himself he would
"Well, don't. It's like those miserable Psalms they're so depressing. Now knock it off!" God ordered as Arthur did with a 'Yes lord' along with his fellow knights. Once that was settled God continued on his main reason for appearing before Arthur and his knights. Primarily Arthur though "Right. Arthur, King of the Britons. Your Knights of the Round Table shall have a task to make them an example in these dark times."
"Good idea, oh Lord!" Arthur complimented
"'Course it's a good idea!" God said, before his face vanished and the sight of a Holy Grail appeared before God spoke once more as his face appeared back "Behold. Arthur, this is the Holy Grail. Look well Arthur, for it is your sacred task to seek this Grail. That is your purpose, Arthur… The Quest for the Holy Grail!"
After that God decided to peace out and leave to Arthur's Knights of the Round. As Gods face, then light behind him vanished. The clouds after closed like a door, before the scene changed back to Arthur and his knights.
"A blessing!" Arthur said with a new found sense of duty and this one given by the lord himself which was the extra sprinkles on this metaphorical ice cream sundae of theirs
"A blessing from the Lord!" Lancelot said next with determination
"God be praised!" Galahad cheered happily also at their newly giving quest which he was sure would be filled with honor
As the servants continued watching the movie. They wondered if this would ever show more action on these later scenes. Not that the other few scenes didn't have that, they just thought there would be more action considering the genre of the movie and the era it was in.
Still as the scene changed again. Now it seemed the title of the movie itself was part of the film. As animated trumpets from clouds popped out with a tune. Followed by some odd and gross imagery accompanied by Angels blowing trumpets too. And then in stylized lettering with angels on both sides. This title card said 'The Quest for the Holy Grail'. Accompanied by more sounds of trumpet playing.
Then another moment of slight amusement for the group was ruined though as they saw the scene change showing Arthur with Galahad, Bedevire, Lancelot and Robin behind him. All doing that moronic skip galloping while their 'Steads' followed behind clopping those damn coconut shells once more.
All this while going down a trial on an overcast morning while triumphed music played in the background. This went on for a bit more as they passed by peasants and those alike. Before they finally made it to a castle. The scene changing then to show Arthur telling everyone to halt as they did. Then Arthur did a few hand motions as his knight got on his left and right while their 'Steads' moved behind their respective riders. Once there the music became louder and much more triumphant. It sounds like it's about to hit its high point before…
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.
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"BRRVVVV!"
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One of the 'Steads' blew a horn loudly as abruptly cut off the music. As it did, the scene then changed back to Arthur who went about addressing the castles residents.
"Hallo!" Arthur yelled loudly. Though no response came as the scene changed from knight to knight who also waited for some kind of response. When nothing came Arthur decided to try again "Hallo!"
"Allo. Who is eet?" A man who sounded very… French like replied back as he came up to the wall. The servants all wondered how the French servants would think of such an accent
"It is King Arthur, and these are the Knights of the Round Table. Who's castle is this?" Arthur answered loudly and hoped things would go over well. He needed a break after the stuff from a while ago
"This is the castle of Our Master Guy de Loimbard!" The French guard answered as the servants really now cringed a bit at how stereotypical the guard sounded
"Go and tell your master that we have been charged by God with a sacred quest. If he will give us food and shelter for the night he can join us in our quest for the Holy Grail." Arthur explains in a loud and clear tone
"Well, I'll ask him. But I don't think he'll be very keen... uh, he's already got one you see?" The French guard explained as it showed him a bit more up close before it turned back to a rather confused Arthur
"What?" Arthur asked as that sounded ludicrous and he swore he must have heard wrong just then
"He says they've already got one." Galahad answered confused himself at what was just said like everyone else
"Are you sure he's got one?" Arthur asked once more. Making sure that he heard that right and for some reason too he was getting the feeling this French solider was messing with him
"Oh, yes, it's very nice-a." The French guard replied back. Before the scene switched showing three other guards hiding behind the wall to his right. He pulls back for a moment and whispers to them "I told him we already got one."
The other three guards there laugh as quietly as they could or covered their mouths at how funny this was to mess with the Brits here. This was the highlight of their day.
Though that said the servants here had a few words to say on this scene alone and some other aspects they found either a bit cringy or were wondering on.
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"Ehhh… this is…. Ehh…." Arthur said cringing a bit at this scene or more specifically the actor's French accents
"Yeah….." Gawain and Lancelot muttered in agreement with their king as they had to admit this seemed a bit over the top for accents
"I mean we can tell this is supposed to be probably during the 100 year war considering the context but… wow." Tristan exclaimed as he too found this scene a bit much with the accents and that was saying much considering he'd done in his mortal life, a few rather good French mocking accents to get a laugh from the others
"I'm just glad none of the French servants are here, most would not be happy about this. Lord forbid if Maria was here, she'd start crying." Gareth stated, though felt bad to speak alight ill on one of her closest friends. The others couldn't help but agree with her on that. Especially with Maria who could be at times a bit of ah...ahem, cry baby
"She is a sensitive soul that one. So peppy yet easy to cry when faced with cruel thing. This wouldn't be cruel in a more childish sense." Bedivere simply added in his own two cents here
"Still it's kinda of mean they depicted the French like this. Hope this isn't a real world view from the directors is all I'll say. If so I don't want to like this movie then." Amelia honestly said as she would not watch the director's other possible movies if they turned out to be just a way off the to mock other under the pretense of comedy. That was a big no-no for her even when she was alive
"That is fair little sister. But I'm sure it's for comedic purposed… even if it's not really that funny." Arthur exclaimed as he could see why his little sister would feel that way. Still he cringed again at how stereotypical the French accents were "Let's ah… not ever mention this movie to any of our ah... French allies shall we?"
"Yep…" Everyone else answered simple and quickly
Then like the times before they watched on the screen play out before them.
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As they got their thoughts and opinions so far on this scene out. They continued watching to see it had changed back to sky view of Arthur and the others.
"Well… um, can we come up and have a look?" Arthur asked getting his composure back as it seemed he was either iffy about believing it or totally fell for it… the ladder seemed less likely sadly
"Of course not. You are English types-a!" The French guard yelled back bluntly
"Well, what are you then?" Arthur questioned
"I'm French. Why do think I have this outrageous accent you silly king!" The French Guard answered like it was obvious and that Arthur was just a moron… which this one might not be too off on that assessment
Once more the servants watching cringed seeing this and really were glad it was just them here, they didn't think of their French servants would care much for this scene in particular. Though one or two would be amused they knew for sure.
"What are you doing in England?" Galahad questioned as that was a smart thing to ask considering
"Mind your own business!" The French guard yelled back as that the knights were quiet for a moment before Arthur just about had it here already with these French pricks
"If you will not show us the Grail, we shall take your castle by force!" Arthur threatened
You don't frighten us English pig-dogs. Go and boil your bottoms, sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you so-called Arthur-king. You and all your silly English kaniggets. Thppppt!" The French guard insulted before he stuck out his tongue, hit the top of his helmet and kept his tongue out for a bit longer before the scene changed back to Arthur and Galahad at the moment
"What a strange person." Galahad remarked
"Now look here, my good man-" Arthur tried to say before he was cut off by the French guard
"I don't want to talk to you no more you empty headed animal food trough whopper. I fart in your general direction. You mother was a hamster and your father smelt of eldeberries!" The French guard stated proudly, mockingly and with full intent to insult Arthur; and his knights as childishly as he could
"Is there someone else up there we could talk to?" Galahad after a few seconds of silence asked, hoping that maybe they could still try diplomacy
"No, now go away or I shall taunt you a second time-a!" The French guard answered with his own threat this time
"Now this is your last chance. I've been more than reasonable…" Arthur began to explained though the scene changed back to the French Guard speaking to his three other friends
"Fetchez la vache!" The French guard said in his native language while Arthurs ranting was barley heard other than an echo now. When one of his comrades asked 'Wha?'. He repeated again "Fetchez la vache!?"
The scene quickly showed now the three guards taking out a cow from its pen as it mooed. Before the scene changed back to a upper view shot of Arthur and his men. Arthur still speaking, but only for a few more seconds.
"If you do not agree to my commands, then I shall-"Arthur said on. Before he was cut off suddenly by something unexpected
Said unexpected thing was the very same cow that had been somehow catapulted over the wall and was now landing towards the round. A few surprised screams and even a 'Jesus Christ!' could be heard before the cow landed on its back with its leg up still. But landed on was the servants assumed was Arthurs 'Stead' Patsy… maybe. One that looked pretty dead or at least critically injured. A few seconds of silence more before Arthur decided he RELALLY had enough of this nonsense now.
"Right… charge!" Arthur yelled taking out Excalibur while his fellow knights did the same yelling 'Charge!' also
As this happens the scene changed showing the knights charging while the four French guards threw stuff of the sensible, to the stupid beyond belief stuff at the round table. One of the French guards even said 'Ah, this one is for your mother!'. While the knights all but tried to fight off the falling items and even animals thrown down at them
"Run away!" Arthur yelled loudly and first, before his men followed also yelling that too. As they passed by the cow moments later where it seemed Patsy, yes it Patsy it seemed was okay
Though the scene changed once more showing the first French guard sticking his tongue out at them again in a mocking manner with a mocking sound. Then the scene switched back to the knights hiding and laying down a hillside. All of them eying the castle.
"Fiends. I'll tear them apart!" Lancelot angrily yells before Arthur stops him before he can do anything stupid saying 'No, no, no.'. Thankfully Lancelot listened, before Bedivere perked up a bit
"Sir I have a plan, sir." Belvidere simply said with a hint of pride in his tone and then scene faded to black
As the group went back to watched on sighing a bit at their movie counter parts or again at least those present. They were hoping this got better or at least funnier for some of them at least.
Still the scene went from pitch black back to showing the castle once more. It was quiet as the French guard could be seen well watching the wall like he usually did. But as he did, he began to hear the sounds of chopping wood, sawing wood and other odd noises that echoed from the forest.
Then seconds later once more one of the oddest things for the servants watching happened. As it seemed their movie self's had decided to make a Trojan Horse or in this case… a Trojan Bunny as it was wheeled out in the open coming closer and closer to the castle being pushed by the knights servants. Stopping a few feet away before booking it. While the back view of Arthur, Galahad, Belvidere, Lancelot and Robin could be seen.
Then the scene changed showing the door to the castle opening with a 'squeee' sound. The first French guard popping his head out slowly before seeing the bunny and going back inside for a moment while leaving the door opened.
Some mumbling in French could be heard as the servants watched the scene play. Then some more muttering before all four French guards popped out to see the bunny. Then popped back in muttering some more before a 'Let's go.' Could be heard. Then the four guards slowly came out.
As they did so one by one, taking a look to see just in case. The scene changed showing Arthur and his men duck their heads as to not be spotted. Though as they did this, the servants watching all realized the fault in this plan and either groaned or for once laughed at the stupidity being played here. As the guards took the Bunny away, Arthur and his men pop back up watching before the echoes of the doors closing could be heard. Seeming very proud of this plan Arthur turns to Bedivere.
"What happens now?" Arthur asked a bit more chipper seeing that the plan had work swimmingly
"Well now, uh Lancelot, Galahad and I wait until nightfall; and then leap out of the rabbit. Taking the French by surprise. Not only by surprise, but totally unarmed!" Bedivere explained as the at least two of the servants faced palmed, one being Chaldea's Belvidere. Mad not because of how stupid the movie one was at the moment, but because… well he would have had the same lapse of judgment too at one point in his life
"Who leaps out?" Arthur questioned as this plan was just getting better and better
"Uh, Lancelot, Galahad and I. Uh leap out of the rabbit, uh and uh..." Bedivere began to explain before he started to realize the ahem… error in their plan. The others realizing too began to seem more down as they just wasted time doing this for nothing
"Oh..." Arthur muttered as he covered his face at the realization of this critical error
"Oh... um, l-look if we built this large wooden badger-" Bedivere tried to say if only to maybe salvage this plan. But was cut off moments later from a smack to the helmet by Arthur
Then a sound was heard in the air. What it was, well nothing aside from it being the sounds of the BUNNY BEING SHOT IN THE AIR RIGHT AT THEM would be the reason why. The five knights of the round screamed 'RUN AWAY!' and their 'Steads' followed behind. All except Patsy who had a sling on him and was too late to move. Seconds later the bunny landed at their spot exploding into bits of wood and crushing Patsy under it… again assumed to be Patsy. Probably wasn't, but then again 'Steads' were a coin a dozen it seemed. All the while this went on, the four French guards laughed at the sight before them.
The adult servants all groaned a bit as this brought back some memories from their early years in the round table. That and especially with Bedivere who sighed as this scene had been a little familiar to him in some manner. Amelia would have asked, but she had a feeling it was better to just leave it.
Anyways the scene changed once more. Now showing the old man again from before who seemed to be doing a side along story in modern times documenting the adventures this movies knights of the round went through. Right now they saw the action clip in front of the old historian.
"Pictures for Schools, take 8. Action!" The director of this documentary said as a clapperboard snapped before the stagehand got out of sight
"Defeat at the castle seems to have utterly disheartened King Arthur. The ferocity of the French taunting took him completely by surprise and Arthur became convinced that a new strategy was required if the quest for the Holy Grail were to be brought to a successful conclusion. Arthur having consulted his closest knights, decided that they should separate and search for the Grail individually. Now, this is what they did-" The old historian began to say, before suddenly a loud war cry echoed follow by a….
HOLY SHIT AN ACTUAL HORSE, WHAT THE HELL?
Yes, oh yes finally the servants see the majestic horse used probably now and only now in a scene with a knight slicing the Historians throat as blood spewed out and fell over dead. Out of all the scenes to have a real horse and it just had to be the most violent one… of course.
Still as it happened and the knight ran off on his horse from the murder scene. An old woman who had been with the old man ran up to the now pretty much bleed out older gentlemen.
"Greg!" The woman yelled out as she looked over the now identified and dead Greg
None of the servants watching could even make a word as they just started at the scene that just happened. They had no words, they majestic horse had finally shown, only to be shat on by the movie and used for a murder pun in their eyes. Actually this brought on a who new strings of questions in their minds. Like why kill the old man, why use a damn horse for this scene alone the servants assumed already, what time period were they supposed to be actually in and why the bloody hell did the knight even do this in the first place. Which actually that last question coincides with the first questions but semantics.
Still in their silence and just wanting to not even acknowledge to what in their eyes was a bastardization of the majestic horse. They all in silence agreed to just on watch on as the scene now changed once more.
Now it was showing another story book page that said 'The Tale of Sir Robin'. With happy music like it was overshadowing the fact there had been just a horrific murder that occurred just moments ago… but this movie had yet to disappoint. Be it for ill or not… be it for ill… or not. Well mostly ill to be honest… yep.
["The Tale of Sir Robin... So each of the knights went their separate ways. Sir Robin rode north, through the dark forest of Ewing, accompanied by his favorite minstrels."] The narrator exclaimed as the scene had changed to a forest and cliff like area as it slowly zoomed in before the scene faded away and showed…. ugh
Damnit all….so of….. ughhh… it showed Sir Robin doing that stupid ass riding motion as his 'Stead' clacked and clacked those darn coconut shells. After that last scene, this one was just leaving a bitter taste already on the lack of real horses. Anyways the servants notice there was one more addition to Sir Robins party, a minstrel that acted like a medieval radio… if not to be soon a rather… honest radio.
Bravely bold Sir Robin, rode forth from Camelot.
He was not afraid to die, o Brave Sir Robin.
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways.
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin!
He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp,
Or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken.
To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away,
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin!
His head smashed in and his heart cut out,
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged,
And his nostrils ripped and his bottom burned off,
And his penis-
As the rather honest minstrel and his merry band sung the song, at first it sounded nice and kind. Yet became a more honest song about how horrifically Robin was gonna probably die. The servants had to admit it was funny, though Arthur had covered Amelias ears yet again at the last part much to the young girls irritation as she pouted before her brother let go of her ears. That said at the same time Robin finally cut in.
"That's… that's uh, that's enough music for now lads. Looks like there's dirty work afoot." Robin quickly cut in through a few stutters trying to bring the focus onto well anything else
"Anarcho-syndicalism is a way of preserving freedom." A man who sounded very much like Dennis from the earlier scenes said passing by Robin, his 'Stead' and his merry band of minstrels
"Oh, Dennis, forget about freedom. Now I've dropped my mud." A woman the servants assumed was also the same one from before stated as the scene changed and panned over to the right more which was the direction Robin was going
But now it showed three dead knights pinned on one long javelin and stuck in a tree. Their stomachs bleeding still as Robin passed by them. Before he and his merry band were stopped by a rather odd advisory… a three headed knight.
"Halt. Who art thou!?" The three headed knight said. Who had one head in the center, left and right. Wore a wide body yellow tunic over metal armor with metal mesh over the heads and three black hand prints on the chest; while in the left hand was what looked like a claymore
"He is brave Sir Robin, brave Sir Robin, who-" Robins minstrel band began to sing at the worst timing, thankfully despite his own fear Robin quickly fixed that
"Shut up!" Robin yelled shutting up the band quickly. Before fearfully looking back at the three headed knight "N-N-Nobody really, I'm was j-just passing through."
"What do you want?" The three headed knight questioned with that ever so loud tone of theirs
"To fight and-" The Minstrel began to try and sing again. One would swear they were just stupid by this point, but yet again Robin acted quick enough before he got killed because his merry band of idiots
"SHUT UP!" Robin said loud and more sternly. Before focusing back on the three headed knight "N-Nothing. Nothing really. J-Just to um, just to p-pass through good Sir knight."
"I'm afraid not!" The three headed knight answered
"Ah… actually I am a Knight of the Round Table." Robin explained trying to scare the three headed knight if anything
"You're a Knight of the Round Table?" The three headed knight questioned seeming surprised yet oddly intrigued, which could be a bad or good thing… hopefully it wasn't the ladder
"I am." Robin answered with as much courage as he could muster up right now
"In that case I shall have to kill you." The left head this time said… oh bugger it was the ladder
"Shall I?" The middle head asked
"Oh I don't think so." The right head replied back
"Well, what do I think?" The middle head asked the left head
"I think kill him." The left head rather happily suggested which made the other two heads stare at him for a moment or so before back at Robin
"Well let's be nice to him." The right head suggested now
"Oh shut up." The middle head argued back at that stupid suggestion
"Perhaps-" The left head began to say before them middle had cut him off
"And you." The middle head said catching Robin trying to past by them
"Oh quick get the sword out I want to cut his head off!" The left head said quickly and again a bit too eagerly
"Oh, cut your own head off!" The right head snarked back at his left head brother
"Yes do us all a favor!" The middle head stated in total agreement with his right head brother as Robin and his merry band watched the drama start up
The servants decided to speak a few words on this scene already and even make a bet or two at whose guess would be the correct one at how this scene would end up going.
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"Okay, hehe this is kinda of funny. Hehe." Amelia mused as she found this scene also rather humorous thankfully as she giggled some more
"It is isn't it, I have to admit to it's smart on how they did this scene too. I'm expecting it's a well made prop for the body." Arthur agreed with his little sister as he also found the scene funny, but more interesting with how the costume was made
"Probably my king." Lancelot agrees as he studies the three headed knight outfit some more "Looks like just a big tunic sown and wrapped around the three who are playing this scene."
"Either way it's probably one of the more likable scenes here honestly and like Amelia said. It's pretty funny. Hehe." Gareth mused as this scene and the last one were one of the only two she'd like fully so far
"Maybe we could do a costume of this character for the first Halloween next year. I know the masters have been wanting to host Halloween since we unable to celebrate for obvious reason." Bedivere suggested as that sounded fun to do and he was the masters would find it amusing. Avid if they had seen this movie before hand
"Oh that would be fun!" Amelia cheered in a giddy tone as she clapped her hands before looking at her boys "Oh, oh. Maybe you, Gawain, Lancelot or Tristan can do the costume too. That would be amazing!"
Gawain, Lancelot and Tristan were about to kindly try and decline their young queens request. Bit before they could their King came cut in seeming fond of the idea too.
"That sounds wonderful, guys I'm sure you could do so right?" Arthur happily asked as at least for Gawain, Lancelot and Tristan they felt a hesitation to try and decline the request
"Well I'm more than willing to do so for my young queen if she so desires. I'm sure my fellows agree too!" Bedivere in his own obvious kindness happily agreed to this and dragged the other three with him
"They totally do. Besides I could fill in if one of them can't, but I'm sure they're more than willing!" Gareth also said in glee, though for some reason Lancelot, Gawain and Tristan feel as if she did this on purpose...
"Oh I can't wait for that then, hehe!" Amelia cheered very happy now at what she expected would happen during Halloween now
Lancelot, Tristan and Gawain meanwhile could only awkwardly smile, and sigh as they know they could say no now considering how happy the young queen was now. So they just accepted their fate. Though Lancelot does decided to bring something else up just for fun.
"Yes well anyways... mind me saying. But what do you lot think will happen in this scene, I personally think the three headed man will quickly smite Robins. Just seems like its heading to that conclusion." Lancelot asks the most of the others wondered on that or agreed with him. But he noticed the young queen in though "Hm, do you not think so my young queen?"
"No I don't Lancy. I think he'll make his way off in a quick escape somehow. Hm, how about if you all are right I have to… ugh eat spend the next week eating vegetables. But if I win, I get to have caked every night this next week. Deal?" Amelia answered. Deciding for fun to make a small bet out of this, might as well since this was to her a good 50/50 chance she'd be right
Lancelot then looked to the others who took a moment before just nodding. After that a deal was struck between Lancelot and Amelia. If Amelia lost she'd have to fo4 the next eat only greens or a.k.a vegetables. But if she won then she'd get cake for a week being served by everyone here who'd have to wear a maid or butlers attire. Again it 50/50 and they went back to watch the scene unfold before them with much more interest now.
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After those few words and bets were made. Now the servants were much more invested in this scene as they waited to see who was correct and who would stuck with Fou clean up duty for the next week.
"What?" The left head asked confused on why all the sudden hostilities from his brother heads
"Yapping on all the time." The right head answered before looking away irritably
"You're lucky. You're not next to him." The middle head argued now with the right head on who had it worse
"What do you mean?" The left head again questioned at what the issues was exactly
"You snore." The middle head answered as the left head found that silly
"Oh I don't." The left head argued back, before bringing up his own issues "Anyway you've got bad breath."
"Well its only because you don't brush my teeth." The middle head countered as Robin and his merry band still were watching this family drama unfold before them
"Oh stop bitching and let's go have tea." The right head finally said looking back at his brother heads as this arguing was pointless
"All right, all right, all right. We'll kill him first and then have tea and biscuits." The left head replied back in agreement as he also realized this was pointless to argue
"Yes." The middle head simply said also in agreement
"Not biscuits." The right head hissed seeming not either like or want biscuits
"All right all right, not biscuits. But let's kill him anyway." The left head relented in agreement so long as they actually got to kill Robin
"Right!" All the heads said in agreement now before facing where Robin and….
Ah shit, he booked it. Like long gone by this point… well guess it seemed Amelia won the bet and quickly let everyone know that. Hey she might be a younger version of Artoria but she was still a kid, for now at least.
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"HAHAHAHA. I win, I win. I knew that would happen, haha. Who's the smartest I am, I-I am. Yeah!" Amelia cheered as she stood up doing a little victory dance and totally rubbing it
"You know I am happy for her… but I feel like I'm being insulted by accident. Bedivere: I think we are. My king were and your sister even this way as kids?" Bedivere asked and honestly that was a fair questions to ask
"I think Artoria more than me, she had a bit of a bad habit of being a little smug at times from what I can tell. That and she hates losing." Arthur answered
"We know… trust us. Rule of thumb my king, if she ever asks you to play cards with her. Let her win, because last time I won she gave me the silent treatment for a day." Lancelot replied back and shivered at the rather uncomfortable day then when the queen got upset losing a board game and refused to speak with him the whole day
"Really?" Arthur asked surprised by that as he didn't expect his sister to be that bad of a sore loser
"Oh yes my king. The queen is… a…." Tristan tried to say and yet couldn't find a word that didn't sound to demeaning
"My niece is a sore loser dear nephew. A BIG sore loser and I've scolded her enough times already for it. Seriously that girl needs to learn she can't be the winner in EVERYTHING." Gareth explained firmly for once as she swore she'd have to giving Artoria a spanking if she kept that behavior up every time she lost at something. Hey she might be nice, but she's also a scary aunt at times
"Well… I'll keep that in mind then." Arthur muttered before looking at his still gloating little sister. Then pull her into a nuggie hold and ruffled her hair up a bit as Amelia whined some be he let her go and chuckled a bit "Heh, alright. Enough Amelia you can gloat later okay?"
"Ugh… you messed my hair up you stupid head…" Amelia groaned as she did her best to fix her hair back up
"Well call that karma." Arthur teased as Amelia stuck her tongue out at him. That got a laugh from him and the others
After that they went back to watching the movie once more. Wondering what else they might be witness too, hopefully like this and last scene it was actually funny at least.
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After the little bragging fest from Amelia. They all went back to watching the scene before them finish they assumed as it just seemed to be going that way now.
"He buggered off." The left head said disappointed as they looked around for Robin yet saw nothing
"So he has, he's scarpered." The right head replied back as he and his middle head brother also were disappointed in this turn of events
(Maybe if you hadn't argued so much… dumbasses.)
Still the scene changed once more showing Robin 'Galloping' on his 'Stead' with his merry band of relentless and blunt radio like minstrels were yet again singing of now his current exploits. As you may guess, it was not flattering one.
Brave Sir Robin ran away
No!
Bravely ran away, away!
I didn't!
When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled
No!
Yes Brave Sir Robin turned about
I didn't!
And gallantly he chickened out Bravely taking to his feet
I never did!
He beat a very brave retreat
Oh, lies!
Bravest of the brave Sir Robin
I never!
Then scene began to end as the minstrels sung the song of Robin being a scaredy cat and turning tail, all the while Robin did his best to argue against all those claims even if they were true and just happened… like come on man really?
Still after that odd scene. The servants keeping quiet still saw the next transition. Now in the form of monks praying and moving in a line towards the left side of the screen. They all chanted 'Pie Jesu Domine. Dona eis requiem…' As they sung that, it stopped for a moment when the cartoonish monk at the front stopped. Before moving to what looked of all things a diving….
SON OF A BITCH. YET AGAIN IT WAS WITH THE DAMN ODDNESS!
Yep. Again with the ever growing oddness of this movie that the eight servants now wondered if it was divine punishment form the Lord himself for their past transgressions. Still they watched as the lead monk jumped from the diving board and into a pond below as the transition scene zoomed out showing so. The chanting went on again a second monk followed, then the third who missed, hit something else that fling them upwards to the title of this scene. As the narrator muttered the words.
.
The Tale of Sir Galahad
.
A little cartoon of a nun blessing a peasant was next to the words as the monk that was flung hit the image of the peasant who flung around in a circle before facing upwards buttock pointed up as his ahem… bare region was exposed to the nun. The nun even making a rather happy 'Hmmm.' sound like she enjoyed the view.
The servants had to say something yet again. If only to exclaim their worries of their now very possibly degrading sanity as they watched on this movie of utter defeat that this movie would either get serious or well at least less stupid. Parody or not from what they had quickly checked earlier on about this type of movie. But still Parody or not they had limits.
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"Okay… can I be honest. I believe our past endeavors have damaged our brains some… like a lot really because I don't think sane people would sit through this movie…" Arthur said as by this point he swore the only reason he was dealing with this movie so far was because of some kind of brain damage. Most likely received thanks to the past endeavors, wasn't too much of a stretch too
"Very… blunt my king. But I'd say it's just acquired humor which most us I believe don't have or barley have… that said. I do have to admit I worry my sanity and mind have dwindled quite a bit thanks to the early days and the masters out of town relatives… indeed." Gawain replied back. As he thought his king might be overexaggerating on that part. Least he hoped so and to be honest, to him at least if they had formed some kind of brain damage. It wouldn't most likely the servants from the Solomon days that got any kind of Brian damage. Considering the master's out of town relatives presence alone brought more trouble than needed or wanted
"It wasn't that bad honestly." Lancelot argued as the early days hadn't been that bad... at least in his opinion... kind of... half-half to be honest
"Didn't you fall off a cliff side and land on your head when one of the Shades popped up from the ground?" Arthur asked as he brought up one of the more surprising moments that had occurred early on when he first appeared in that Lost Belt he was part of
"I did... I ah…. ah…. hm. Nope not coming to me, you sure?" Lancelot answered. Thinking back on that memory and well nothing, which was odd he usually had a good memory... he thought so at least
"And I believe we can count you my friend out of these sorts of opinioned talks considering what you just displayed to us." Tristan exclaimed in a deadpanned panned tone and gaze as he wondered if he should suggest to the masters to have his friend get a checkup...
"Yes that would seem so… ugh. I still can't forget the creepy Monkey Heartless… always laughing at us…. always." Bedivere muttered remembering his own experiences with the Heartless and those creepy Monkey variations. So much creepy laughing and staring... just why... WHY!?
"There, there boys. It's all okay, we only probably suffered SOME brain damaged and some loss of sanity. But again by only a bit." Gareth reassured... kind of... eh. It was more like she did reassure the others, but also somehow did not realize she hinted at the possibilities of probably brain damage of some kind
No one said anything since Gareth was smiling sweetly and arguing with her would be like punching a sweet old pre-school teacher in the face. It just wasn't right to do.
"We all have SO much brain and sanity damage don't we… oh dear heavenly lords keep an eye on us…" Amelia meanwhile muttered to herself and been prayed for their future safety
With that everyone despite the internal and dread filled realization of probably brain damage. Went back to watching the movie play out.
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After they let their grievances and worries of loss of sanity, and memory. They continued to watch the movie as the scene now showed Galahad.
The young knight was somewhat frantically running past and through bushes and branches as the sky was showed it was in a more darker setting at the moment. The music also enhanced this feeling as the servants watched Galahad fall to the ground.
They all were rather surprised as maybe they jumped the gun on this one. It looked rather serious and even a bit eerie too.
Still they watched as the young knight kept going clawing his way up a hillside as fog covered the ground a bit, creepy distant screams echoed and all in all. Again it was creepy and a bit different from what the rest of the scenes had shown so far.
But finally as Galahad took a moment and stopped. Angelic humming echoed, the scene changing showing a castle covered darkness with a window showing a light was on inside. A stock image of a grail floated above the castle and it was unclear if this was the grail itself or more likely a vision from desperations to find it. That or Galahad was just losing it, either or.
Galahad then continued his way as rain began to pour and some more creepy screaming in the distant echoed. It wasn't seconds later before the young man finally made it to the wooden door of the castle. Knocking on it as the rain poured onto him. To be honest the servants actually got a bit excited wondering if this movie was about to do a serious tone shift finally.
"Open the door. Open the door!" Galahad pleaded as he banged on the door a few more times with no answer. He lets out a sigh before pounding on the door once more saying "In the name of King Arthur, open the door!"
Suddenly the door slightly opened with squeak. The scene then changed as the servants saw Galahad fall right onto the ground inside. Taking a few moments to groan in pain before she shot up a bit hearing the door close somehow behind him. Then he suddenly was greeted by the residents of this place.
"Hello!" A rather enthusiastic group of women in white dresses looking fairly young greeted the young knight. Though the one in front seemed older as she wore headwear, held a torch in her right hand and also was the one to continue speaking with Galahad
"Welcome gentle Sir knight, welcome to the Castle Anthrax." The oldest women kindly said
"The Castle Anthrax?" Galahad questioned as he eyed the place a bit and found name rather… something is all that could be said
"Yes... oh, it's not a very good name?" The older woman mused, before smiling once more "Oh. But we are nice and we shall attend to your every, EVERY need!"
To be honest the males in this group of nine reactors caught onto how enthusiasm the second 'Every' had been put into it. They all had a good idea what kind of place this was, legends had been said about places such as these. Havens for those with ah…ahem, certain needs and tastes. Like once Lancelot who was doing his best to not suddenly exploded from perverse jealously being played before him on a dream he had always prayed to happen with him.
As everyone aside from Amelia eyed Lancelot just in case he snapped. Lancelot gave a quick thanks to God that Mash hadn't been here to see what chaos he almost brought upon this group if he had been a weaker man.
Though to be honest, everyone else at this moment worried also that this movie would somehow corrupted little Amelia by the end. Then they'd have to deal with the big sister or A.K.A the adult Queen Artoria. Still they just went back to watching the scene before them play out.
"You are the keepers of the Holy Grail?" Galahad questioned
"The what?" The older woman questioned
"The Grail. It is here?" Galahad asked once more as he began to get back up
"But you are tired, and you must rest awhile." The older woman oddly said like she was changing the subject all of sudden. She slightly turned her head to two of the girls to her right "Midget, Crepper!"
"Yes O Zoot!" The two young ladies said as they quickly moved over to the older woman or now known as Zoot. Which was a weird name to be honest but who are we to judge?
"Prepare a bed for our guest." Zoot ordered as the two younger women smiled a bit too happily at that
"Oh thank you, thank you, thank you-" The two girls began to very enthusiastically thank Zoot
"Away, away varletesses!" Zoot cut in as she shooed the two off. Then she looked back to Galahad with her kind smile helping the young knight back up to his feet " The beds here are warm and soft, and very, very BIG."
Again Zoot really seemed to be putting emphases on certain words and the fact this one was 'Bed' really brough up some red or maybe not red flags. For both Galahad in the movie and for the men, mainly Lancelot. They had a VERY good idea on what was possibly going to happen now.
"Well, look, I-I-uh-" Galahad tried to say feeling a bit uncomfortable yet not all of sudden
"What is your name handsome knight?" Zoot cut off as she seemed a bit too eager suddenly. But Galahad ever being a good knight stayed polite despite his slight uneasiness growing
"Sir Galahad... the Chaste." Galahad answered politely keeping his shield in front of him now. Hoping that that last part might help keep whatever these women were planning, at least he was getting the feeling. But help him stay safe from any… well never mind
"Mine is Zoot... just Zoot." Zoot answered just in case the young man didn't hear beforehand. She leaned a bit closer then was comfortable for the young knight before she grabbed him around the arm dragging him now deeper into the castle "Oh, but come!"
"No…. please. In God's name, show me the Grail!" Galahad argued as he really didn't want stay here anymore then need be. Temptation was ever present and he could feel it… kind of. Not like he knew for sure since he hadn't ever done 'THAT' yet
"You have suffered much. You are delirious!" Zoot yet again oddly said as she really seemed like she was trying to steer the conversation to anything else right now
"L-look, I have seen it. It is here in the-" Galahad irritably said as he began to try and make his way out only to feel Zoot keep a good grip on his arm as she stared at him in the eyes
"Sir Galahad. You would not be so ungallant as to refuse our hospitality?" Zoot asked a bit sternly yet with a softness still. That and hitting a metaphorical nick in Galahads armor when it came to well not being considered an uncouth prick. Low blow lady…. low blow
"Well, I-I-uh-" Galahad tried to argue. But couldn't as Zoot had a point about being uncouth if he were to refuse their help as odd as they had been so far, while Zoot began to lead him to wherever again
"Oh I am afraid our life must seem very dull and quiet compared to yours. We're but eight young blondes and brunettes." Zoot said. Though to the servants that was rather oddly specific to bring up
.
(Seriously though lady, laying on thick already like sheesh…)
.
"All between sixteen and nineteen and a half, cut off in this castle with no one to protect us!" Zoot went on and the servants, especially Amelia who cringed found that a bit creepy to say with such enthusiasm
.
(Again lady… a bit much and that kind of talk would just lead to a weird kind of outcome honestly…)
.
"Oh, it is a lonely life. Bathing, dressing, undressing, making exciting underwear..." Zoot mused a bit bashfully as she placed the torch she had in a holder on the wall. Before leading Galahad up some stairs. The servants raised a brow or went a little wide eyed at how forward that was
.
(For the love that all is holy lady. Stop, just STOP. You smell of desperation and loneliness easily now… like for real. Have some dignity….)
.
"We are just not used to handsome knights. Nay, nay, come, come, you may lie here." Zoot said on as she was pulling Galahad to a bed, the man himself a trying to break free if not politely. Only for Zoot to drag him to the bed and lay him down on it. Then began to rub his inner thigh a bit" Oh you are wounded."
"No, no i-it's nothing!" Galahad tried to argue and pushed Zoot's hand away from him
"Oh, but you must see the doctors immediately. Please, lie down." Zoot reaffirmed and pulled Galahad back down on the bed when he tried to get back up, before clapping her hands as two younger woman came in
"Ah. What seems to be the trouble?" One of the younger women asked as the other stayed quiet
"They're doctors?!" Galahad questioned a bit worriedly as there was no way these two beau… young respectable young women were doctors. They wore the same dresses as the rest of the women here for gods sakes
"They've have a basic medical training." Zoot admitted as Galahad bolted up and try to make a run for it. Ploy or not, basic was not a good sign already. Zoot though quickly got a hold on him and pushed him back down on the bed. Even stroking his hair once or twice "Come, come. You must try to rest. Doctor Piglet, Doctor Winston practice your art."
Zoot then left as Piglet and her friend knelt down on Galahads left side of the bed. The friend taking the shield as Piglet was of all things undoing the belt he wore. Galahad nervously keeping his eyes pointed straight ahead at the wall if not to temp himself if he looked at the two women.
"Try to relax." Piglet simply offered as she slowly was undoing his belt to enjoy this moment
"Are you sure that's necessary?" Galahad asked as he kept his composure the best he could
"We must examine you." Piglet answered as she and her friend smiled a bit. Piglets friend moving up the lower cloth part of his tunic right as Piglet got the belt off
"There's nothing wrong with that!" Galahad yelled as he tried to cover himself once more
"Please. We are doctors." Piglet reassured pulling back up the flap piece of his tunic with a small smile and was about to touch him… down there before Galahad had enough
"Look, this cannot be. I am sworn to chastity!" Galahad stated sternly as he moved on the other side of the bed, got his belt back on and was getting his gear together before he just would make a run for it
"Back to your bed." Piglet asked kindly if not with some sternness
"Torment me no longer. I have seen the Grail!" Galahad argued back
"There's no grail here." Piglet simply said, but Galahad would not be deterred at least what the servants guessed considering how stubborn their Galahad had been in life
"I have seen it!" Galahad argued back once more. Before bolting off the bed and away to where the heck one went to exit this castle of temptation. The scene changing showing Galahad push back some curtains as he yelled "I have seen it. I have seen-"
But the servants saw Galahad stop of all sudden and even gulp a bit. The servants, at least the males here all kept quiet as to not say anything that the young queen could hear what the obvious guesses of their could be. In the perverted sense one could say. That and they knew Amelia would prob them if they did say anything on this subject, not to mention how angry their king would be with them probably.
Gareth meanwhile was happy the three perverts didn't make a comment or so on this scene. But she sighed a bit knowing how this would go. So she and the rest watched on as they quickly saw exactly why the movie Galahad, had well… suddenly lost his nerve as he clung on his shield a bit tighter they noticed. For why… oh…
OH indeed, as it was the one thing a man who was trying to fight against the temptation of the flesh would find a nightmare. As he seemed to have stumbled upon the shared large room of the rest of the maidens. The scene changing showing Galahad looking around and showing many of the younger and lovely young ladies who called this place home. Some were bathing in their dresses, some on their beds, others had been talking. But now all staring right at Galahad with coy, shy and flirty smiles.
As Galahad slowly walked through the room of very tempting young ladies who said hello to him. Young women who also really….REALLY were making it hard to not leave already and not be bewitched by their looks alone. Both hard in the mental and yes physical way as they moved closer, closer to the young knight. Didn't help that their dresses though conservative oddly clung onto their bodies too showing off their curves and such.
It yet again was Lancelot who had to make a comment on this, that and Tristan who decided to add in his two cents. It was to hard not to considering their own ahem… perverseness at times. So they gave each other a look as they spoked in a hushed tone leaning closer to one another.
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"Hmmm. You know I wouldn't mind seeing a few of the more… ahem, mature women here in such attire." Lancelot mused as he did his best to not make a perverted grin as he imagined many of the mature women of Chaldea wear such attire like in the scene. Then to some of the more youthful ladies "Especially the somewhat younger ones like Miss Osakabehime. Despite her odd personality she does have it where it.. ahem counts."
"That I will agree. Though someone else like Miss Medb would be a nice looker in an outfit such as the one in this scene. She may not be as filled out as some of the other rather… curvy women. But she does give of that more innocent angel with a demonic side vibe." Tristan mused as he had a type and apparently it was innocent looking yet sadistic as hell. How or why this came be... maybe best not to know
"Hm... that's kinky. Though many would do in such pure colored, yet tight dress. Oh so many… too many and with how some of them dress. I'm surprised I haven't made too many clank noises with my armor when I talk to them." Lancelot remarked as he was really was glad he had his own room, private time was for him the vest time... freaking horn dog
"I am too… anyways. Aside from most of the lovely flowers that bloom in this garden-" Tristan continued on before Lancelot cut in
"So cheesy man… come on." Lancelot said cringing aimed at the ever so cheesy lines his friend could say at times
"I will say that Mash would be quiet them…eh…" Tristan went on like he hadn't been interrupted. Only for the to stop and realize what he said next. That and the dreadful feeling suddenly coming from Lancelot
"I'm sorry did you just say something about my daughter…" Lancelot asked with a tone that promised a slow death "Friend?"
"Hmmm… well ah…" Tristan tried to say through his sudden fear. Only to stop for a moment then get some grit back as he went on "Mash is ah... s-she's just a very lovely young lady is all. She is filled out I mean ah… eh…"
But before Lancelot could possibly deck Tristan for his comments about his little angle of a daughter Mash. Both felt two balls of paper hit their heads. They took a moment before looking to see Gareth giving the two a silent glare that said 'I'm watching you two...' Both men quicky shut up as to not incite the possible wrath of the dubbed group mom of their group. Then like the other they went back to watching the scene play out.
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As Lancelot and Tristan both hung their heads a bit as Amelia got done scolding them in her own kid way. They and the rest, even a somewhat more dejected Lancelot and Tristan. Went back to watching the scene before them.
They saw Galahad finally able to make his was around and back while avoiding the women. Then down a set a stairs that he hoped and prayed would lead to an exit of this castle of temptation. As the servants saw the scene change showing Galahad was nearing an exit they assumed. They saw Zoot suddenly pop out in front of the young knight.
"Zoot!" Galahad said half surprised she just suddenly appeared and half nervous too considering how clingy she had been at first with him
"I am Zoot's identical twin sister, Dingo." Zoot… or 'Dingo' said like she was total a different person and not just pretending to be someone else… for whatever reason
"Oh well, excuse me, I-" Galahad for some unknown reason believing the woman, replied back as he tried to pass by 'Dingo' who quickly blocked his path
"Where are you going?" 'Dingo' asked
"I seek the Grail. I have seen it, here in this castle!" Galahad once more argued as 'Dingo' for some reason looked like she was contemplating on what Galahad had just said
"Oh, no. Bad, bad Zoot!" 'Dingo' exclaimed in an upset manner
"What is it?" Galahad questioned as the servants really wondered how much odder and in Amelias case, how much dumber this was going to get
"Oh wicked, bad, naughty Zoot. She has been setting light to our beacon which is grail-shaped. It's not the first time we've had this problem." 'Dingo' explained in a disappointed manner
"It's not the real Grail?" Galahad in his own disappointed tone asked back as he swore he saw the grail here
"Wicked, bad, naughty, evil Zoot. Oh, she is a naughty person and she must pay the penalty!" 'Dingo' sternly exclaimed before the servants saw the oddest thing happen. 'Dingo' suddenly stared right at them and literally broke the fourth wall "Do you think this scene should have been cut. We were worried when the boys were writing it. But now we're glad. It's better than some of the pervious scenes I think."
The next thing the servants knew, they saw the three headed knight on screen once more standing in the forest before they suddenly spoke back.
"At least ours was better visually." The three headed knight stated
Then the scene changed showing the two peasant Dennis and his lady from the second scene after the first one, on the ground messing with some dirt or… maybe something else but the ladder was more preferable as they spoke now.
"At least ours was committed. It wasn't a just a string of pussy jokes." Dennis added in
Then the next three scenes showed two male characters the group hadn't even seen yet. Then a group of soldiers they again had not seen. All saying the same thing of 'Get on with it!'. Before the scene changed back to Galahad and 'Dingo'
"I am enjoying this scene" 'Dingo' exclaimed with a smile
Then the scene changed quickly showing the image of this movies version of God who also said 'Get on with it!". Then a change back to 'Dingo' showed her sighing as she closed the door she just went through. Looking back at Galahad moments later.
"Wicked, wicked Zoot!" 'Dingo' exclaimed as she made her way off screen as Galahad followed
Then next scene showed that 'Dingo' had lead Galahad back to the room with all the women in there. Stopping a few moments once inside the room 'Dingo' then faced back at Galahad.
"She must pay the penalty. Castle Anthrax we have but one punishment for setting alight the grail-shaped beacon. You must tie her down on a bed and spank her!" 'Dingo' stated in a matter of fact tone much to Galahads surprise at that
"A spanking. A spanking!" The other girls around cheered rather too happily as Galahad just kept quiet yet seemed still a bit uneasy
"You must spank her well. And after you have spanked her, you may deal with her as you like. And then spank me." 'Dingo' explained as Galahad wanted to argue but was stopped by all the others girls saying 'And me!' after "Yes, yes. You must give us all a good spanking!"
"A spanking, a spanking!" The other woman yet again cheered rather too happily
"And after the spanking, the oral sex!" 'Dingo' added in with glee
The servant, mainly Lancelot had a few sudden words to say on this matter as it too hard not to at the moment. Again mainly Lancelot for….reasons.
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"IT SHOULD BE ME, WHY ISN'T THAT ME GOD, WHY….WHY?!" Lancelot screamed suddenly from the sheer force of his perverseness as Gawain, Tristan and Bedivere already lunged at the man to keep him still
"Ah guys he's going a pervy like Mash warned us he could. What do we do?" Amelia screamed scooting aways a bit as she'd never seen this pervy side of Lancelot. But now she could say fully that it really was like a secondary personality for the knight
"Hold him down for… WILL YOU KEEP CALM MAN!" Gawain ordered. Already having issues keeping Lancelot down when it came to the fairer sex, lord he knew how that felt but at least he could keep it in... mostly
"IN THE VALLIES OF BIG OLD BOOBIES GOD PLEASE GRANT ME MY HEAVEN PLEASE. I WILL LITERALLY CUT MY OWN JUNK OFF TO DO SO!" Lancelot chanted a pray and plead of perverseness and sex to the lord himself. As if he'd be transported to a world of scantily clad big boobies maidens... ah the dream... ahem I mean how perverted... yeah...
"Wait wouldn't that just mean you'd be unable to consummate with the fairer sex?" Tristan pointed out at the flawed logic of his friend. Which promptly registered with Lancelot
"AHHHH. NO. NO MY NIRVANA IS SO FAR AWAY NOW AS DREAM THAT WILL NEVER BE…." Lancelot cried as literal blood seemed to be coming out of his eyes now as tears, before whipping the tears and looking upwards with a 100p yard stare of agony "WHY?"
"WHY DID YOU SAY THAT TRISTY. LET THE MAN DREAM!" Gareth scolded as she knew that Tristans comment just made it Worse. Still she did kind of feel bad for Lancelot even if he was acting as a pervert. Didn't mean she wasn't going to scold the moron "LANCY CALM DOWN NOW MISTER. YOU'RE SETTING A BAD EXAMPLE FOR THE AMELIA HERE!"
"Hurry, I can only cover her ears for so long before she tries breaking free!" Arthur meanwhile pleaded as he'd been covering Amelia's Eads, which she didn't not appreciate one bit
"Hmmm….. Arthur let me go, I'm not a baby!" Amelia pouted as she was trying to worm her way out of her brothers ear covering hold
"TRYING, WE ARE TRYING!" Gareth and Gawain at least answered
"BOOBS, BOOBS. BIG BOOBS AND BIG BUTTS. I NEED THEM SO BADLY, MY CRAVING FOR THE WARMTH OF A WOMAN TORTURES ME EVERYDAY!" Lancelot in his maddening state of perverseness screamed to the heavens as he was nearing his critical point and was even starting to have signs of his Berserker form coming out now
"Hm…" Tristan who had stepped back from holding Lancelot down mused. Before remembering Bedivere knew just the trick "Oh, wait Bedivere can't you…"
"Yes, yes I can. I just wanted to see how long this one would last, nearing two minutes. That's a new record. Anyways..." Bedivere with no shame whatsoever answered back before he simply raised his hand up and bopper the top of Lancelot's head with a hand chop. Seconds later Lancelot just stopped and looked like he was rebooting as he was sat back up with everyone else looking at him surprised as did for Tristan of course. Bedivere just smiled happy with the results "And there we go. One to be rest Lancelot."
"Well done." Tristan praised as Bedivere just smiled and gave a nod
"W-Wait when have you been able to do… do THAT?" Gawain asked as no one aside from apparently Tristan and most like Arthur along with Artoria at least knew of this
"Yeah where did that come from?" Gareth asked too as she had no idea Bedivere knew how to do that
"Oh yes. Well you see after coming here to Chaldea, the queen asked if I could learn from some of the others pressure points and techniques for occasions such as these ones." Bedivere explained as that made sense, even if it was still surprising
"Ah good on her. I forgot to ask that of you myself, I'll have to tell my thanks next time we see her… erm. When we do considering." Arthur mused as he already knew the best gift to his sister, a nice meal for a thank you for asking that of Bedivere when he forgot to do so
"Indeed. Anyways enough of that, we have a movie to watch still." Bedivere mused as he smirked a bit from the praise for once
"HM…." Amelia whined before Arthur let go of her ears now. Where she then gave her brother another pout and glare before lightly smack his right arm "Finally. Why do you always do that you.. you meanie!"
"Heh….eh…. let's just say I like being alive and your sister would kill me if I had let you listen to Lancelot just now." Arthur sheepishly explained as he and his sister skill wise were the same. But he still though she could hand him his backside if she got angry
"Hmmmm… fine… whatever… meanie." Amelia muttered as she pouted some more but let it be
The other just sighed in relief as the situation wa handled and Lancelot would be back to his usual self soon. Still they all just went track to watching the scene play out.
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It was a good thing that Arthur had covered her little sisters ears once more before Lancelot let out his perverted rant of fantasies. As Lancelot was rebooting after shorting out from his sudden influx of lewd thoughts. The group went back to watching the scene before them unfold.
"Oral sex. Oral sex!" The rest of the women cheered in utter glee as Galahad seemed to have a change of heart hearing that all of sudden
"Well, I could stay a BIT longer." Galahad exclaimed
Though after their few words on such a situation. As group quickly noticed that suddenly as Galahad was FINALLY getting with program and was about to live out a sexual fantasy most would KILL for. Especially Lancelot who suddenly rebooted back to his senses hearing this too.
But they noticed from the background that suddenly the movie Lancelot came in from the back with a few other nameless knights as back up. Movie Lancelot stopping right in front of Galahad as he began to already drag him away. Movie Lancelot… you damn bastard.
"Sir Galahad!" Lancelot said slowly dragging him away while 'Dingo' was trying to keep him place. While the knights with him made sure the surrounding beauties were being pushed back
"Oh, hello." Galahad said rather happily having no idea he was about to drag away from this dream of many
"Quick. You're in great peril!" Lancelot explained like it was obvious as he was slowly dragging away Galahad more and more to the door out of here
"Why?" Galahad questioned as he had no idea why Lancelot was thinking that, now that he though more on his situation he was in heaven; truly he must have been
"No he's not!" 'Dingo' argued as this man to her was NOT gonna take away their only chance of getting some after being stuck in this damn tower for so long
"Silence, foul temptress!" Lancelot yelled back making 'Dingo' back away as he the man was about to strike her down
"She's got a point." Galahad stated suddenly as Lancelot stopped his almost beating and looked back at Galahad
"We'll cover your escape!" Lancelot yelled in a panic pushing away now to and through the same stairs from before as the nameless knights tried to fight off the now closing in women who tried to get Galahad back
"Look, I'm fine!" Galahad argued as he was being pushed down the stairs as a faint 'Wait Sir Galahad' from one the ladies or even 'Dingo' barely echoed
Then the group watched the scene changed showing Galahad being pushed still by Lancelot on the first floor now. With the two nameless knights still keeping the raving women at bay.
"I can handle this lot easily!" Galahad argued trying to go back to the group of women, with no luck as Lancelot already had a good hold on him as they neared the exit
"Yes. Let him handle us easily!" 'Dingo' argued/ pleaded as she had gotten past the two knights with some her girls as she grabbed onto Lancelot's arm; the two nameless knights on each side of the girls to keep them at bay in more of a line. All the while the other girls also shared and pleaded the same sentiment of being tackled like 'Dingo' had
"Wait, wait please. I can defeat them. There's only a hundred and fifty of them!" Galahad pleaded with no luck as he was now pretty much near the exit with Lancelot as the two nameless nights followed behind as the they all vanished off screen
"Yes, yes, he'll beat us easily, we haven't a chance!" 'Dingo' agreed as one last ditch effort
Then came the pleads of the other girls also agreeing that Galahad could totally handle all 150 of them with no issue. That he would be better off alone here as he was capable knight to deal with them easily. Then came the panicked arguing amongst themselves. Before the sounds of the entrance opening echoed and then a loud 'BOOM' as the door was now closed leaving the women now alone… again. 'Dingo' or Zoot or… who cares. She was the only to sum up their mood now
.
.
.
"Oh, shit…."
.
.
.
As the group watched on surprised by how odd, if not kind of funny, if not too also raunchy the scene had been. They had decided to keep their peace for now as they saw the scene changed once more. Showing Lancelot holding Galahad by the arm as he's dragged away from the castle itself. The servants watch to see how the remainder of this scene would play out.
"We were in the nick of time, you were in great peril." Lancelot exclaimed with relief as he lead Galahad by the arm as the two nameless knights followed behind him
"I don't think I was." Galahad replied back, sounding a bit dejected now at his fellows knights bad timing
"Yes you were. You were in terrible peril." Lancelot stated once more as if it was a matter of fact
"Let me go back in there and face the peril." Galahad pleaded a bit as Lancelot just ignored his pleads
"No, it's too perilous." Lancelot argued back as he kept pushing Galahad away from the castle of fleshy temptation
"It's my duty to sample as much peril as I can." Galahad tried to explain as the servants agreed a bit but didn't think 'THIS' was what that initialed
"We've got to find the Holy Grail." Lancelot simply said as he turned a corner of the castle with Galahad as the two nameless knights stayed behind them as a guard
"Let me have just a little bit of peril?" Galahad pleaded just a little more as he, Lancelot and their two nameless knights got further and further way from view
"No it's unhealthy." Lancelot scolded
"I bet you're gay!" Galahad childishly stated
"No, I'm not." Lancelot simply said sounding tried
The scene then changed back to the story book. The words 'Sir Lancelot saves Sir Galahad from almost certain temptation.' On the left side of the page, while on the right showed the image of Lancelot right when he was turning the corner with Galahad in his arms. The narrator speaking now like before.
.
.
.
[Sir Lancelot had saved Sir Galahad from almost certain temptation. But they were still no nearer the Grail. Meanwhile King Arthur and Sir Bedemir, not more than a swallow's flight away. Had discovered something.]
As the narrator spoke the same gorilla hand from before appeared turning the page to oddly scene twenty four all of sudden, bit a jump but okay. Still the as the scene panned to the image. Showing two of the 'Steads' from before seeming lost as they stood around ruins while next to some junk that was smoking. Then a bird chirped above and for some damn reason the narrator got really peeved by that.
[Oh, that's an unladen swallow's flight, obviously. I mean, they were more than two laden swallow's flights away, four, really, if they hadn't a cord of line between them. I mean, if the birds were walking and dragging-]
Then then scene quickly changed showing the crowed of knights from before screaming 'Get on with it!'. If only to make sure the story didn't get TOO of track. The narrator quickly caught himself before speaking once more.
[Oh, anyway… on to scene twenty four. Which is a smashing scene with some lovely acting, in which Arthur discovers a vital clue in which there aren't any swallows. Although I think you can hear a starling… Oolp!]
As the sounds of the narrator most likely by guess now being sacked too for going off track again in the span of not even a minute. The screen suddenly went back. Before the movie paused and the laptop that had been on the table came on again with new message. The servants leaning in to read it, though it was Amelia who read it out loud.
Dear viewers
Greetings again. We are glad that you have survived the utter stupidly, humor and insanity that is this movie is so far. We can tell you are all half and half on this film. That's fine, we want honest reactions here so no shame if you don't come out liking it. That said we decided to pause this film for three reasons. Well four actually. One to give our dear Lancelot some more time to cool himself off after his reboot. Two to give you all a bathroom break if needed, three also to give you a snack break. Fourth and lastly to make sure you don't go insane watching this move without a quick break.
There will be snacks in the fridge and cupboards, you have half an hour before we started again so no rush. That said before we let you off. Give us first impressions of the movie so far, again be honest there is no wrong answer.
Sincerely,
Your captors… haha sorry couldn't resist
It was between a minute or so as the eight looked to each other. Wondering who would say something first and release the damn that was their mixture of amusement, cringe, hatred, liking and lose of insanity that was this film.
Any one of them could snap and let it all out…
Any… one of….
Okay it was it was Amelia who broke the metaphorical camel's back.
"RAGGGGGGHHHH!" Amelia yelled as everyone flinched for a moment when the young girl did so. After that she took a few deep breaths, then cleared her throat "Ahem… sorry about that. I ah, just have mixed feeling here with this film so far… I know it's supposed to be what the grail knowledge explains is 'Parody' but I still wasn't a fan of the humor for the most part. Most of it was pretty mean spirited and… eh… not my thing really. I did find the Camelot part funny though, that and at least the scene with Galahad; and the maidens. Those were pretty funny. Still not much else on my end with this film. But I do hope the rest will get me more invested."
"I agree with most of your assessment Amelia. But I will add that I did find the Trojan Horse scene very amusing. Hehe. No offense Bedivere." Arthur said next as he chuckled some
"Is fine my leige. It is fine… that said I think most of us can agree we also have mixed feelings on this movie. Like I'm not very fond of that scene with the Trojan horse… or well how my character is portrayed in this film." Bedivere stated as he rubbed his temples as he heard a few "I swear I wonder if everyone in this era thinks we were all idiots back then?"
"Maybe. But that's just how it goes with history… anyways I agree with Amelia more on her opinion with the film. Sure there was some funny parts, even a few jokes got a smile from me despite it all. But I just don't like that mean spirited nature of some of the scenes or the jokes. Just being honest." Gareth went next with her opinion on the film, she then looked to the other boys of theirs "What about you three?"
"I'm more on Arthurs sides on this film. But I can fully admit that I wish that scene with Galahad had happened to me in real life… God why must you torment me so…." Lancelot answered as he though wasn't a fan of some of the humor and found a good portion of this film stupid in some way or another, he did find amusement here and there too
"Of course you would… still I too am with Lancelot on his opinion with this film so far." Gawain explained before realizing that also could coincided with his friends prevented wants and quickly corrected himself "Ah aside from the part with the maidens…. yep."
"Hm…" Tristan hummed as he and the others knew that Gawain was as much of a prevented as Lancelot. One of the reasons they got along so well when they first meet, even if Gawain was way better at keeping it hidden. Still he wasn't one to talk himself as he though the least perverted knew he still was kind of a pervert at times… what he was still a guy with needs. That aside he decided to keep the opinion train going "If I have to be honest. I too agree with my liege's opinion on the film. Though I will admit I agree with a bit of our young queens thoughts too. Some of those jokes were a bit poor in taste if you asked me."
"So all in all, again mixed opinions with us all." Amellia stated as everyone just nodded and a bit of silence filled the room. Before Amelia ranted a bit again "Did anyone else hate the fact they had a real horse only for a murder scene I mean come on!?"
After that many mummers of full agreement on that part started, then some more ranting as they went on. For now they would have to wait and see what this movie would bring up in the next part.
.
.
.
Hopefully it would more likable then the first part…
And there we are. The end or the figurative road!
So yeah again I apologize for the wait. But IRL and illness can hit ya like freight train.
Anyways hope you like this chapter, it took me a few tries to get the right idea on well what kind of path I wanted to take this one down. As you can see I tried a more comedic route. Oh also if as I've said before in earlier end notes. But I do try my best to make most of the reactions from the servants varied. So some may like a movie more, some less, some a lot, some barley liking it or a mix between like and dislike.
That said as you can see our Knights are a bit on the fence here, least one or two or them while at least the rest are slightly leaning more towards the semi-dislking of the film so far. Again SO FAR. But whose to say the other half of the movie won't change their minds a lot or slightly. Maybe or maybe not.
Well that all said an done there is one more thing I'd like to bring up.
I think I said it in the last chapter. But I'm writing a, hm I guess you can it a prequel to this story about well this Chaldea during the Lost Belts. What places the twins go to in these custom lost belts tied to media since considering this is technically a side in-verse story to my other story Four Hearts Of One Journey. Well at least a glimpse into the future that will happen later on in said story. But I'm nearing done with that one and do hope you enjoy it once the first chapter is up. Just don't expect updates frequently with that one because I need to focus on some of my other fics like a lot.
Oh also I hope again that you enjoyed this chapter enough, I didn't rush it but if it feels like that. Then I apologize for that.
That all done with. I've said what I needed to be said now. So I leave you off with the best of wishes for you all. I hope you have greats days ahead and will see you all in the next chapter. Till then, have a great one! (^_^)