One Last Adventure: Link's Later Years
By Stephen Choiniere
The seasoned adventurer awoke to the sound of gulls wailing outside his bedroom window. The early morning was hazy. Another hot and sticky day on Dragon Roost Island.
Link fell asleep here after being at sea for nearly two weeks straight. His body was sore and tired, more so now than in his younger, more spirited years.
So he pulled himself free of the blankets, uncovering the smooth legs of his bedmate in the process. She was sleeping soundly, content with the conclusion of last night's bedroom activities.
Link made his way to the bathroom and relieved himself. He washed his face and peered into the mirror. The face that looked back at him was broken. He had heavy bags under his eyes, multiple scars and marks from vicious fights, and hair turning from gold to sterling silver. The fuzz along his jawline was beginning to show which meant that it was time to shave again.
He reached for his blade and freed it from the sheath. The blade sang a high pitched 'Shing!' sound. He brought the sharp edge to his chin. Slowly and steadily, he razored off his facial hair.
"Was this the purpose of his legendary blade now? Just a hair trimmer?" Link thought scornfully. How long has it been since he raised the blade in combat? Ten years? No, fifteen?! He couldn't even really remember fully.
Link mulled it over as he rinsed his face with water from the sink basin.
It might've been that big brute of a man in the Canteen, a local Hyrule bar. The man had approached Link and his female companion as they ate and drank and laughed.
Link could smell the strong scent of alcohol as the man nudged their table roughly and started garbling nonsense at them. "Hey, Hey!" The big gruff man barked. His gigantic form eclipsed one of the few lights present at the bar, casting Link into shadow. "Yer that Link fella!"
Link looked up at the man's face and merely gave him an acknowledging nod of his head before looking back at his meal.
"Hey!" The man yelled again, "No, No Listen, here! I wanna see yer sword. Mr. Hero." He was chuckling, "Ya know, the one that banished the pigman!"
Link frowned. He didn't enjoy being looked at like he was some sort of circus attraction. To perform. That was not his quest. Yet still, he always had attention from buffoons like him.
"Come on! Show it! Or are ya too much of a Cucco!" The man bellowed in Link's ear so close that he could feel the warm stink of the man's breath.
Link steadied himself and then shook his head 'no'.
Other patrons in the pub had turned or lifted their heads now at the sound of the drunken man's booming challenge. There were mutterings like "Is that really the Hero of Hyrule?" or "What is he doing with 'her' now?" "Do you think it's really, Link?"
"Yer just a little fairy boy!" The man slurred and spittle flung from his lips. "Just a scared little shit. Little fairy shit. Am I right, my boy? Oh, wait, ya don't have ta answer, Ba ha ha!" The man lifted a glass of beer and his belly heaved up and down with each laugh. The beer sloshed out and splashed onto Link, drenching the front of his tunic.
Link stood up at once shoving his chair backwards. He lifted his hand to the sword handle but before he could unsheath it a large meaty fist knocked him to the floor. The impact split open his lip and he could taste the warm coppery taste of his own blood.
The other patrons of the bar were all looking now. Shouts of interest grew louder as crowds of people began to closely encircle them. Trapping the two combatants.
The side of Link's head was throbbing fiercely from where he had been struck, but this didn't stop him from standing again. As he rose up he could see the towering man's arm reeling back for another haymaker. This time Link reached for his shield. The club-like hand met Link's fine crafted shield and was deflected off.
Link's riposte was quick. Over in an instant. He drew the master sword with his free hand. With one swift motion, he cut off the string used as a belt on the drunken lad's pants. He then returned to a defensive stance. It was all over if you blinked. He took one lunging step forward shoving the shield into the belly of the man.
As the man was stepping backwards to regain his balance the britches flopped down around his ankles. He was like a thick trunked tree being felled. The momentum of the fall was so great that only the earth could bring it to a halt.
The crowd of onlookers went silent watching in amazement. Wondering how the fight might end. What would the Hero of Hyrule do next?
Link strode over to the half naked man facedown on the bar floor. The man's ass was like a pig's; flabby and pink. Link put the tip of the legendary sword to the right dimple of the large glute. With the precision of an experienced surgeon, Link carved 3 connecting lines in the man's skin. Link gave the pigman some wisdom with a triangle. A triangle scar would appear and with it the knowledge to maybe choose good, over evil, forever thereafter.
A coo of a woman's voice disrupted his daydream in the bathroom, "Are you coming back to bed, Linky-Poo!" She called from the bed. "Linky? Are you in the bathroom?" She asked sweetly.
Link grumbled and thought to himself, "How many years have I been with her?" He couldn't quite remember that either, not fully. His aging mind. Where was 'his' Wisdom? "Yet, she still believes a mute can respond?" He sighed, sheathed his sword, perhaps for the final time and then returned to his beloved.