Content Warning: Non-specific mentions of stigma and violence around psychosis.

The next time Kiba gets to see Kankurou again, he finally looks a little better. He hasn't put back the weight he's lost just yet, but looks a bit more rested and, more importantly, a bit more present.

He's texted him and the others in the band's group chat after a week home to invite them over and Kiba had been, quote-unquote, "wholly insufferable about it" all night according to Shino. (Then again, if he didn't want to be dating someone who has a hard time keeping impatience and excitement under control, he would have left years ago, so Kiba has to assume he means that in an endeared way.)

Now, he's gotten the chance to release a bit of his pent-up energy in a few round trips through the 5 floors separating his apartment from the bins and the Laundromat down the street and is settling down a bit less restless. There is still some evident remnant unease in Kankurou to let them handle all of it, but he seems to slowly grow accustomed to the idea, presumably because he is also realising he doesn't have much of a choice either way.

"You've taken back work?" Tenten asks, pointing at the painting material scattered over Kankurou's desk in the corner of the room.

He nods.

"A bit. I can't sit for very long at once – I'm gonna need some more space on the bed soon by the way – but if I take enough breaks, I can get a few hours done. It's nice. It helps me not go insane spending all day doing nothing stuck in twenty square feet."

Kiba would have died ten times already if it was him, but he doesn't get a lot of time to think about that, because some rearrangement of their seating situation takes place then to let Kankurou lie down on the bed, during which everyone else present in the room makes sure to take all the other places available (Tenten and Hinata on the two chairs, Shino on the floor resting against Hinata's shins and letting her plait his hair idly) and leave him to be the one to share the bit of mattress left with him.

A whole bunch of traitors is what they are.

Kankurou has bent his legs to relieve the tension in his back and stomach, but it's not enough for them not to touch Kiba in places. (Maybe it would be enough if Kiba moved really to the border of the mattress. Maybe he could do that. Maybe he just doesn't want to.) Suddenly, he doesn't know how to sit anymore. It feels like he's either too still or too squirming around. Fuck, he must be so annoying.

After a couple of exchanges that Kiba doesn't listen to because he's too busy gay panicking within the confines of his own mind, Shino's text-to-speech voice catches his attention.

"You should stay at our place. There is an elevator."

He should what now?

Kankurou waves the proposition off.

"It's fine, I'm sure I'll be able to walk the stairs in a couple of weeks."

Tenten scoffs.

"Come on, this is ridiculous, Kanks! You're not gonna stay here alone for two weeks when your friends are offering to pamper you. Right, Kiba?"

She's staring at him. Hard. If he messes this up or passes the chance she's offering him – forcing on him, really – she'll never let him live this down. Shino won't either. Maybe he is starting to reach his limit listening to his boyfriend's pining for real.

"Plus, Kiba finally finished putting his bed together," Hinata notes.

It's when you expect it the less than the people you trust the most stab you in the back, isn't it?

Kankurou spreads his legs to glance at him in between them.

"Haven't you guys moved in like, two weeks ago?"

Yeah. Well. He was busy with other things. (Being an anxiety ball about his crush.)

"We had a lot of boxes. But it's done now!" Hinata says, apparently still her uplifting self despite having chosen her side in this improvised intervention.

Kiba shrugs to give himself some composure.

"I've been sleeping on the couch. I'm used to it now, it can last for another while, you can have the bedroom."

Not a single part of this sounds like a good plan, but he's gotta admit he doesn't really have any other. It does feel like his initial idea of "waiting for a good moment" to talk to Kankurou has so far immensely backfired and that, maybe, it was also a bit of an excuse to wait indefinitely and not risk a rejection. He's not sure it means that literally living with his crush for the next few weeks is a good idea, but he can't fully blame the others for thinking that he needs the external push to actually do something about this whole shitshow.

Kankurou looks at him in silence for a handful of seconds, then at their three spectators, then down to pick up his phone and presumably escape the four pairs of eyes set on him.

"I don't know. I'll think about it."

[19:37] Kiba: We're home ️

*Kiba sent a picture*

[19:42] Kankurou: Good

[19:44] Kiba: You know we meant it, right? What we said earlier about you coming here. It was light-hearted and all, but we would really be happy to have you.

[19:47] Kiba: It was scary, seeing you like that the other day. And I'm not, like, trying to lecture you or anything. I get it, being sick sucks and needing help sucks even more. But still. There are people who care about you. I care about you. There's no need for you to suffer needlessly, yeah?

[19:50] Kiba: If you come, Hinata and I will be at work most of the day, Shino and you will have your own room, you can bring your work over for as long as you're not in a state to go to the workshop yet. You don't have to spend time with us if you don't want to. But at least we can be there when you need.

[19:51] Kankurou: Sounds like a deal that sucks ass for you

[19:53] Kiba: It's not, that's what I'm trying to tell you. I've been living with Shino for three years and we have widely different needs. The whole point of getting this apartment is that the people in it can get the space and help they need. This is what we've always done. And that applies to you, too.

[19:54] Kankurou: You're not gonna get the space you need by being forced to live on your couch

[19:55] Kiba: I don't need space. I need to know the people I love are safe and someone to remind me to take showers. You can come.

[20:02] Kiba: Just think about it, okay?

"I found some vegan frozen lasagna, I thought that'd be good," Temari says while unloading the few groceries she's picked up into Kankurou's small fridge. "There is spinach on the package but I'm gonna take a wild guess and assume this is still probably ninety-eight per cent carbs and three green leaves."

"Sounds like the perfect ratio to me," Kankurou answers from the bed.

"Also some beef patties for easy meat. I figured it wouldn't be a bad idea for you to get some iron into your system."

The comment is light and simple, but the message is still clear: she knows he's let himself bleed a lot, and he won't be able to avoid trying to build it back on her watch.

The door shuts closed with a soft noise and she stands back up in the middle of the kitchen (or the two square feet of the single room that pose as such, at least).

"How are you feeling?"

He shrugs.

"The pain is better. The not being able to sit up for a long time, not much. I'm trying to move a bit but it's not exactly easy here."

She notes silently that the crutches are resting against his desk, not at the entrance, so presumably he's been using them a bit since coming back home. It's not great news in that it means he's been struggling to cross even his tiny studio, but if that's gonna be the case, she's happy to know he's at least trying to help himself instead of stubbornly pushing through or sulking in his bed for days.

"The band passed by this weekend," he continues after a moment of silence, fidgeting with a loose piece of cardboard found G-d knows where. "Kiba and the others offered that I'd stay at their new apartment until I can properly use the stairs."

She raises an eyebrow. This is interesting for many reasons, but she can't look overwhelmingly involved in the matter just yet.

"Did they, now? What did you answer?"

He looks up at her for a second or two, with a face that lets her know he's very aware that the unsaid part of her question is, "Did you act like a hard-headed idiot who doesn't need help again?", and that it's not an unfair question to ask.

"I said I'd think about it and then left Kiba on read when he texted me about it again so now either he hates me or he assumes I hate him, I guess. Or both."

This is not exactly going in the direction she's hoping for it to go.

To be perfectly honest, she doesn't know if Kankurou is interested in Kiba in any way, and she's not setting her hopes too high for this. But, well, first of all, Kiba has that cute overwhelmed puppy energy that makes her wanna root for him, and he might have just saved his brother's life thanks to it, so she's bound to be on his side. And secondly… She knows there's no need for romantic partners in life to be happy or fulfilled, of course, if Kankurou's not interested, he's not, end of the story. But she can tell how much good it has done him already to be with him and the rest of the band this past year, and he's never been great at letting people – other than her – very close, so she's hoping he'll continue opening up like he's been so far. (Distantly, she's aware she has even fewer friends than he does, but it's always easier to fret over people than do the work for yourself, isn't it?)

"What's holding you back?"

She's not going to try and convince him to go if it actually doesn't sound like a good idea. All enthusiastic that she is about this new little telenovela thing going on, it would be outrageously disrespectful to prioritise it over his safety and comfort, especially in this context.

He sighs.

"I know it would be reasonable, on a physical recovery level. I'm not going to be able to take the stairs for another while, and if I'm going to need help regardless of where I am, I might as well not have to force people to come all the way here. And it'll do me some good to be able to stretch my leg and walk more than three metres at once."

"But?"

"But I haven't lived with people in years, outside of the few weeks Gaara was here before finding his apartment – which were not easy – and I'm not sure I can handle that, psychosis-wise."

"How bad has it been this week?"

He shrugs.

"Fine. It's not all too bad now that I'm out of the hospital and drug-free and all. But also, I still feel… I don't know. A bit fragile. Like right now it's at a regular level, but it could be startled much easier than it normally would. And usually, at worst I can just say I'm feeling sick or what and go home and wait until it's better to see another human being. But if I go there…"

He pauses in the middle of his sentence, eyes fluttering a bit as he struggles to put the feeling into intelligible words.

"Kiba said I could stay alone in my room as much as I need and that there would be no judgement, and honestly, I believe him. I haven't seen Shino a whole lot in my life, but it doesn't take much to understand you can't have lived with him for years without knowing how to give people space and respect boundaries. I know the three of them are great, and it's not easy to feel like it's the case, but at the very least I know, intellectually, that it will be okay if I'm tired or spacy or silent or whatnot with them. But I'm scared that this acceptance doesn't actually expand as far as my behaviour might if I get really triggered. Like, what if I get paranoid again and I can't hide it? Will they still be all 'Oh don't you worry, everyone's neurodivergent here, no judgement'? That, I genuinely don't know."

She's not surprised by the question. She hasn't gotten to witness him experience the issue first-hand, and as far as she knows he's been pretty lucky in avoiding that to happen because his masking skills are objectively rock solid most of the time, but that doesn't mean she hasn't grown up hearing and seeing the way people treat psychosis as a subject, let alone psychotic people. And certainly, he has too. She can't brush the worry as unreasonable and tell him to simply trust that his friends will be lovely about it.

"What if they call me?"

"When?"

"Whenever. When you need. What if you tell them that you're okay to try and come, but that you still struggle quite a bit with socialisation because of fatigue and shit, and that if they're ever worried or confused or literally anything they don't know how to deal with or react to, they can call me. That way you know if you don't think you can communicate your needs or what, at all or just not without showing yourself too much in a way you don't feel safe to, I can handle it for you and come pick you up if you need. I'm not gonna be in town all month, but I'll be in the country, and no matter what happens you know I would always prioritise you, yeah?"

He nods.

"Yeah. Yeah, I know."

There's another moment of silence after that that she lets him have because it's evidently not a frozen silence he needs a hand out of, it's a thinking silence, and then, after a short while, he takes another deep inhale, winces, and nods again.

"Okay, yeah, let's try that."