So, I'm Going Back to School

You know when you're just living your life day to day, you tend to ignore a whole bunch of things I've come to realize. A realization that's come way to late but it's still important to recognize I suppose. So good for me.

Yay!

But still, I wish I didn't have to die before learning that little lesson about life.

Haaahhhh… but what can I do about that now? Straight up bubkiss is what. What's come and gone has already happened. Bitching won't change that. No matter how much I want it to.

Man, still sucks though. Who would imagine getting killed by a telephone pole though? That just really sucks if you ask me. And if you did, I'd never imagine that be the thing that killed me. I mean a telephone pole? Really? Couldn't it have been something cooler or I don't know peaceful. Sure, it's not the worst way to die but still it was pretty bad if I do say so myself.

There I was just minding my own business walking down from my apartment complex towards my regular 9-to-5 job at the local antique shop.

Bentleys Trunk.

It was called a nice little place if I'm being honest with decent pay as well. Pretty easy work to and the best part was I had the sweetest little grandma as a boss. Mrs. Trunkers. Weird name but a really sweet lady. I'm also assuming that's where part of the shops name came from but I never asked. I was too afraid I'd laugh while saying her name. But I loved having her as a boss. Despite being up there in age she didn't really struggle much with any of the problems time seemed to have presented to her. She could lift heavy stuff whenever I needed help, and had the hearing even bats would be jealous of.

Make a joke about the wooden dog being a bitch one time and you never hear the end of it with, So much sass for such a small package of a woman. It's honestly kinda impressive. Oh, and another great perk were the cookies. Damn those were good! What other job can you get where the boss will bring you tasty snacks. I tell you I had it pretty damn good in life.

Sucks it's over now.

I was just about to pass that intersection across from Bentley's small little parking lot when my misfortunate tragedy struck. On this concert walkway there I was standing, waiting for the small amount of traffic to pass by so while I waited, I did what I normally do on those days and pull out my phone and scroll through whatever app I had opened last. Tik Tok, Instagram, YouTube, whatever was open last would be the thing I used to occupy my time.

And on this walkway with me is what? You guessed it a goddamn telephone pole.

But not your regular everyday telephone pole no this one is a bit special. You see this particular telephone pole was very similar to a famous tourist destination in Rome. Hmmm…. Maybe it's actually in France? No…no, I'm pretty sure its somewhere in Italy which basically the same as Rome but whatever. If my confusing clue hasn't help you, I'll just tell you the spot I'm talking about is the Leaning Tower of Pisa!

Which I only recently just learned is not spelled like pizza. Go figure but that does make me like it a bit less if I'm honest.

But yeah, this telephone pole has been leaning since… forever, I think. At least it's been leaning since I was just a little 7-year-old. Mrs. Trunkers has been calling the city officials for years to get someone to come down here and fix it apparently. But every time they say the will no one ever comes. "Bunch of cowardly jack rabbits" she would call them. I don't really know what that means but based on her tone it's definitely an insult.

She can be scary when she wants to be.

Man, if I knew that thing was my future killer, I'd get those 'jack rabbits' down there myself. But like I said too late for that now isn't it.

So yeah, on that pretty nice Monday morning while I was watching a stupid little Tik Tok that the leaning pole of Backers Street decides to come tumbling down. Right on top of my fucking head. Getting crushed should have been the worst of it right? Well, you're dead WRONG!

Cause falling on top me wasn't the worst part of it. Thanks to it still being a functional telephone pole, I ended up suffering a truly terrible death.

Electrocution!

I've never experienced anything like that ever before in my life it was horrible. There was barley any time to register what had just happened to me before a pain stretches across my body like a lightning strike, a violent, eradicate surge of energy rips through every single nerve I have- or had. For a split second, just a spilt second there's no pain- just an overwhelming, unyielding fire that overtakes every muscle you can think of within a human body. It honestly felt like my bones were being melted by the heat.

Searing warmth pulses along every fiber of my skin, and the world around me just blurs into a blinding, white-hot haze. No other colors fill my eyes but the void filling white world I lived in for that brief moment of time. I couldn't even fell my heart pounding in my chest. I'm pretty sure it's butter after what happened. I think I tried to scream, but my jaw was clenched so tight I couldn't even force out a gasp.

Then, as suddenly as it started, it ends. My body collapses, limp and spent across the hard concrete. Leaving behind only the stinging, echoing ache of burnt nerves and the horrid smell of burnt flesh and ozone, hanging in the air. And just like that my 23 years on this planet mean nothing. I'm gone lost to the winds.

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Or you know I was until I ended up here. Where ever that is? The fuck even am I now? An afterlife of some sort I'm assuming. But if this is the afterlife, I'm calling some bullshit here man. I wasn't like a saint or anything but I never had to worry about being sent somewhere horrible. Or that was my thought when I was alive at least. But I'm pretty sure that this is a form of torture I'm enduring here.

I mean who makes an afterlife a waiting line? Who does that?

Yeah, you heard me right a waiting line! Like the ones you find at Walmart where the person in front of you doesn't want to spend too much so they use cash and they give exact change. So, they end up taking forever to get going so a line forms behind them until the other people in the line are smart enough to realize that there are other options. God forbid that it happens at more than one check out because then your just screwed!

But yeah, a Walmart waiting line for my afterlife isn't what I had in mind when I finally kicked the bucket. Especially when you multiple the number of people in the line by a like a billion. Well, there not exactly people. Or they don't look like people at least. They look like small little glowing balls. Bigger than a baseball but smaller than a basketball in size and there all glowing an ethereal white. And there all lined up perfectly in front of me and behind me.

I can't even see the end of the line. It might go on forever.

But even though I'm surrounded by these glowing little softballs I don't look anything like that. Not to my eyes at least…not that I have eyes anymore technically. Cause you know I'm dead and all.

But I still look like myself, I think? I can't see my face but these look like my hands just with an ethereal addition to them. And I'm wearing the same close I had on before I died. Nice comfy dark blue jeans, and an old school DnD shirt from the 1970's, I think. I found it the antique shop and Mrs. Trunkers gave it to me for my 1-year anniversary for working at the store. It quickly became one of my favorite pieces of clothing. I've worn it a lot but it's still in pretty good condition. Even here that's true despite the way I…passed the shirt and jeans are clean and look like new.

That a bit weird. But hey it could be worse, I guess. I could be a naked floating corpse or something.

I wonder how long I've been in this line? Time kinda strange here maybe because I don't have any perception of it because I'm a spirit now or something. I'm pretty clueless on this stuff. Anime can teach you a lot but I can't teach you everything I suppose.

I've tried talking to my fellow spirits to by the way to pass the time but considering every time I open my mouth nothing comes out but silence, I gave up after 15 or so try's.

So yeah, here I am a floating spirit man stuck in a hellish long line waiting for my turn at damnation or salvation, I guess. God this suck

I try to shake off the weirdness of it all. If I could I'd roll my eyes. You know if I could, but for some reason, even though it still feels like I have actual eyes I can't look anywhere besides forwards or backwards. Now that's really weird. Almost as weird as the fact I'm standing on nothing. Yep, no floor or ground just straight up nothingness, I think. It's not like I can look downwards. Yet here I am, standing.

Yeah, like I said it's really weird. Standing with my two feet on the ground. I can take a step forward, and yep, there's still something under me. No one else seems to notice or care. They're just drifting along like this is completely normal. And me? I'm the only one in this entire spirit line who has legs, arms, a head- the whole package. It's not exactly comforting. Being the only person looking spirit in a line of others. Is that a good or bad thing? Ehhhhhhh…. Best not think of that.

The line shuffles forward again. Slowly. Way too slowly for me.

C'mon, seriously? How long does it take to judge a spirit?

Ahead of me, the orbs- the spirits- are all getting directed to either the left or right in the surrounding darkness. Each one drifts forward, disappears into the void where a dark figure sits. Their wearing a long black cloak and right in front of them is a desk or something. I can't tell if anything

Is that thing a clerk or something. A clerk for souls' man that sounds cool but I guess in practice it sucks.

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Wait where the fuck that thing come from! It wasn't there before!

Suddenly, I feel it. A cold prickling sensation, like icy needles crawling down my skin. The figure's head snaps up as if it can sense me. Through the faceless hood, I feel it staring. The souls ahead are still moving along, oblivious, being directed to where ever there supposed to go, but the figure isn't looking at them anymore. It's looking at me.

I freeze.

I know I should keep walking to whatever's waiting beyond this line for me, it's not like I have a choice, right? But that feeling and that look is stopping me cold. The souls behind me are passing right through me like they should I suppose. I try to gather what remaining courage I possess but before I can take another step, the figure disappears. One moment it's there, the next- gone so.

Then, without warning, it's right in front of me. No sound, no movement-just… there. Along with that desk that I can now clearly tell what it is. It looks nice made out of some sorta wood but the things on it intrigue me more than the desk. On it stand two sole objects a gavel and a solid gold key.

"You." a raspy, hollow voice whispers from beneath the hood.

I instinctively swallow hard, trying to hide the sudden jolt of fear that runs through me. But my throat feels dry. Like I haven't drunk water in years. Whatever this thing is it sure knows how to scare someone shitless.

"Uhhhhh…. Yeah". I respond.

Wait holy shit I can talk now I move my ethereal hands to my throat and start making random sounds and words

"Peter Piper picks some ducks along the beep bop klabamboo! Hahaha! Hahaha, I can talk again! I CAN TALK AGAIN!" I yell out

The cloaked figure doesn't seem to like that. As it angrily growls out some mitch mashed Frankenstein noise of sounds.

"Sorry." I mutter sheepishly.

It leans in closer, its hollow voice sounding more irritated than before. "You are not like the others."

"No kidding," I mutter, trying to ignore how close this thing is. Its breath- if you can call it that, feels like frost creeping along my non existing skin. "What gave it away? The fact that I'm the only one who's not a glowing tennis ball?"

Hmm probably shouldn't be so sarcastic to me supposed judge.

The figure doesn't respond right away. It just stares- or at least I think it's staring. Hard to tell with no face. After a moment, it steps back, a bit of dark mist swirling around next to its form.

"You should not be here," it says, voice laced with curiosity. And a small stack of papers appears next to it. His hooded head turn and looks over it quickly searching for something.

"What do you mean 'should not be here'? I got crushed and zapped by a telephone pole and here I am. Pretty sure that qualifies me for the afterlife line. Or whatever this is." I point out to the thing in front of me

The figure pulls back, its gaze still on the stack of papers it's looking through. As if trying to understand something. There's a long pause before it speaks again.

"You are not meant for this place. You… have a body. The others have passed on, departed from there mortal coils, but you… you are an anomaly."

"An anomaly?" I ask, starting to feel a little more confused than scared now. "Look, I didn't ask for a VIP pass to this...thing whatever it is. If I'm not supposed to be here, where am I supposed to go?"

The figure stays silent for a long time. Too long. I start to push my thumb into the palm of my closed hand- an old habit that I guess hasn't left me, even in death.

Then, with a slow, deliberate movement, it raises a bony, shadowed hand. A ripple of darkness flickers around me, and suddenly, it's like the whole place changes. The souls around me vanish, the endless line disappears, and it's just me, this thing and a tall metal door covered in ritualistic symbols right behind the cloaked figure.

It takes a step back, as if observing me.

"You are to be reincarnated," it finally says.

My brain stutters for a second. "Wait. Reincarnated? Like… you mean like that anime thing that happens in Isekai's?"

The figure nods slowly, its hood bobbing up and down. Apparently understanding my reference.

"That is correct. Your death was… unfortunate. A mistake. Or a correction of fate."

I blink. A mistake? This whole situation just went from weird and confusing to completely off the rails crazy. "So, what? I'm supposed to get a do-over or something?"

"Not a do-over. A new life." It said like it was giving me some sage wisdom.

"Yeah, that's basically the same thing."

"No," the figure snaps. "This life will not be like the one you knew. You will remember your former existence. But nothing of this place or what has passed here"

I fold my arms, trying to process everything. "So, I just get dumped into some new life, with no memories, no choice, nothing?"

The figure hesitates for a moment. "That is… the process." Clearly confused by my attitude. Even though it shouldn't be I mean come on 'a mistake' how can my death be a mistake? How does that even happen?

"If it's a mistake, can't you just send me back, please?" I tell the cloak figure desperately. "Come on there's got to be something else I can do. I… I liked my life it wasn't perfect but it was good isn't there something anything?"

"No! What has passed cannot be undone. Your fate may have changed but its finality is without question."

I sigh out something more like a groan. "Yeah, thought so but… I had to try, I guess. But it kinda sounds like I'm getting the short end of the stick either way. Where am I supposed to go? Another dimension? Maybe come back as a pet or something? I swear if you turn me into a bird, I'm gonna be really pissed."

There's another pause, and I swear if this figure had a face, it would look almost… uncomfortable.

"Your next life has already been chosen. You will live in a world very different from your previous one. The culture and lifestyles will be foreign to you. And your circumstances will be… different."

I narrow my eyes. "Different how?"

"That is not for you to know."

"Great, that's reassuring. You can't tell me anything about where I'm going."

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"No."

"Damn it!" I spit out. "Can I at least keep my body somehow?"

The cloaked figure tilts it's head at me questioningly before responding with "Perhaps. But not exactly so."

"What the fuck does that-"

Before I can protest further, the figure reaches out with one hand. And I feel a strange pull, like something is yanking at me from the inside. And I'm walking towards the metal door my ethereal hands stretched out towards the handle resting right in its center. I can't even say anything as my hands grab onto it and with a quick pull the door opens. The world around me blurs, twisting and warping and then everything fades to black.

And just like that, I'm gone.

Location: City of Valdivik

I wake up to the sound of raindrops pelting the ground around me. A cold chill starts to creep over my skin, and the first thing I realize is that I'm lying flat on back on some sort of paved surface. My head's throbbing terribly, and my body feels way heavier than it should, as if all my muscles are aching. Disoriented, and dizzy I blink up at the sky, watching the dark clouds roll overhead. The rain is starting to become relentless, drumming against the ground and my face, soaking me through in seconds.

Well, that's just great isn't it! Fuckin hell I hate the rain!

I try to sit up, groaning as I feel an awful soreness in my limbs. My fingers press against the cold, wet stone beneath me, and the discomfort of it all snaps me back to reality… or, well, whatever this is.

Wait… wasn't I just… dead?

Oh shit! I totally was wasn't I!

I shake my head, trying to clear the fog and rising panic back to the corners of my brain. The memories of that black-cloaked figure and the strange conversation we had flood back to the fore front of my mind. Reincarnated, they said. A whole brand spanking new life.

Just not the one I want.

"Guess this is it, huh?" I mutter to myself. My voice echoes oddly in the alleyway around me, bouncing off the stone walls that seem to close in. As if they agree with my prognoses of my current… whatever you'd call this.

I push myself to my feet, my legs wobbling for a second before I can steady myself. And after taking a deep breath, I press onward.

Into the unknown right?

As I stumble out of the alley, I take in the city (what little of it I can see) before me. Towering stone buildings line the streets, their architecture a weird mix of medieval and something else entirely, something I can't quite place. But it's the people…or, I guess, the creatures, that make me stop in my tracks.

A group of what can only be elves walks past, their long ears peeking out from under their hoods, moving with a kind of ethereal grace that's hard for anyone to ignore.

Then there's what I can only assume to be, a Tiefling with horns curling out from its forehead and crimson skin gleaming even under the downpour. He strides confidently through the streets, the long tail swaying behind it like an afterthought. Like he'd just received the best news of his life. Not caring that his fancy looking suit is getting drenched in the rain.

I blink, shaking my head, trying to make sense of this bizarre scene. There are more of them. An orc, towering and broad-shouldered, brushes past me with a grunt, not even bothering to apologize as I stumble back into a puddle. A Tabaxi, a humanoid feline with fur covered limbs passes by, her sleek brown coat dripping with rain, but she moves with a hurried predatory like elegance.

"What... the hell?" I mutter to myself, staring around like a total idiot.

Further down the street, I spot a Warforged, a hulking, metallic figure, its face a mesh of iron and steel, moving with surprising precision for something that's just a tall walking piece of metal. It speaks in a low, mechanical voice to a merchant, whose stall is full of glowing trinkets of some nature.

I rub my face, trying to snap myself out of the trance. But just as I think I've seen everything, a hulking Dragonborn strides into view. Its scales are a shimmering brass, it's clawed feet click on the wet pavement repeatedly. Its reptilian like eyes dart around with a heightened keen awareness, and its nostrils flare, as a small stream of fire escapes from its mouth into the cold air.

"Right," I mutter. "Definitely not Kansas anymore huh."

I take a few more hesitant steps out of the alley, the sights and sounds of this strange city hitting me all at once. The noise is overwhelming vendors calling out their goods, people bartering, the clanking of armor, the low hum of some sorta energy, seems to pulse through the streets. And the smells of freshly baked bread and treats are mixing with the stench of damp earth, metal, and the occasional scent of only a crowd can give.

I start walking, not entirely sure where I'm going, but I just pick a random direction. Some instinct, or maybe just my own stupidity, is telling me to move away.

Up ahead, two more Dragonborn engage in some kind of heated debate, their deep, guttural voices rising above the din of the marketplace. And to my left, another Tabaxi perches on the edge of a stone fountain, tail swishing lazily as she sharpens her claws on a piece of wood.

"What is this place?" I mumble, my head already starting to spin.

I try to shake off the confusion, but it's hard to ignore the fact that nothing here feels familiar. The buildings, the creatures, the strange energy that I seem to feel that's pulsing through the air, everything here is foreign to me.

And yet, I'm here, standing among it, just like today is any normal day in this city of impossible things.

The rain continues to fall, but no one seems to care. Some don't even look wet. I march forward in a trance trying to blend in with the crowd. As I wander deeper into the streets, the crowd thickens, and I can't help but wonder what I'm supposed to do now. This isn't just some dream or nightmare. This is real.

And if I can be honest here, I'm kinda scared out of my mind right now!

I stop for a moment, leaning against the side of a building, watching as a group of adventurers- at least, that's what they look like, pass by, their armor gleaming under the rain, weapons strapped to their backs. They're talking in hushed tones, their expressions serious. But about what I don't know. And I'm too far away to hear them.

"What am I supposed to do now?" I whisper, as I feel the weight of this new world, and my precarious situation press down on me.

XXX

Hey there everyone nice to meet you!

Yes, this is a Dungeon and Dragons story. I won't deny I'm both existed and a bit scared in writing this story. It's only my second attempt at writing a story ever and it's going in a completely different direction than my other one.

There don't seem to be that many on this site that feel like an actual adventure story that isn't either a just A just a rewrite of an actual play session, or B which they'll be about previously established characters and games or don't scratch the right itch for me personally. Which I don't mind but I struggle to find many good ones I really enjoy reading.

If you know of any feel free to tell me I'd love to read some more :)

But anyway, I wanted to try my hand at writing a story like this for a while. And considering I just posted my first story ever I figured why the hell not give this a shot now too.

And I'm kinda glad I did

Now I'm a fairly new fan of DnD (about a year or 2) so I'm most assuredly going to get stuff wrong when I'm writing this out. So, I ask for patience and support from you guys and gals and in-betweens as I'm writing this out and figuring how where I want this story to go. I have a very good general idea I'm just working on details if you catch my drift.

This story is going to take place in my second favorite DnD adventure ever. You might be able to figure it out from the title alone.

But thanks for taking the time to read this. I hope I can one day make this an amazing story, even if I'd honestly just settle for good.

So, with all that said once again thank you for taking your time to read this story and I hope you have a pleasant day, till next time.

Peace out!