Eddie´s POV.
"Anyone seen Buck today?" Chimney asked as he stepped up to the kitchen island, Hen who was looking skeptically at the dinner Bobby was attempting to teach Eddie on how to cook, shrugged "Not yet" she said.
Eddie frowned but didn't say anything, he was too busy coming up with possible excuses to the bruises on his knuckles and his chest and back in case anyone were to notice them.
He knew that Bobby suspected something was going on, otherwise he wouldn't have asked Eddie to help cook, considering Eddie was a terrible cook. Bobby knew he was doing something unhealthy to cope with everything that was going on, with Shannon coming back, then asking for a divorce, then her dying, and then everything that happened with Buck, first the truck bombing, then the embolism, then the tsunami with Christopher and then with the lawsuit and now Buck coming back like nothing had happened.
Eddie just hoped that Bobby didn't know just what he was doing to cope with everything.
"No, I haven't seen him yet, why? Is everything okay?" Bobby asked with a frown.
"I don't know." Chim said with a defeated tone, which got Hen to give the conversation her full attention, "Maddie has been weird the last few days, and then this morning she said something about Buck, that just made me think something was up, and now he is late so…" he let out a sigh of frustration.
Hen frowned "What time is it?" she asked.
Eddie looked at his watch before looking back up at her "It´s 8:45." He stated before he realized why she had asked.
Buck was late. And Buck was never late, not in all the years he had been at the 118. He was always the first one to arrive, some days even before Bobby, and he was always one of the last to leave, usually Bobby or Eddie had to drag him out and force the man to go home and rest.
Suddenly, Hen gasped, and everyone turned their attention to her, she grabbed her phone that had been on the countertop and started scrolling through her phone, after a few minutes she looked up with tears in her eyes "When was the last time any of you talked with him?"
That made everyone frown, Chim had technically talked with him just last week, but that was only in passing when Buck was having dinner with Maddie and picked her up, Hen had shortly talked with him in between calls, but even then, something had seemed off, and Buck had hurried away from her.
Eddie had chosen to ignore him out of anger, but also out of fear of having him get close again, so he had kept his distance, even though it was slowly killing him. And Bobby, he had only talked with Buck to give out an order, and whenever he did that, it was always a one sided thing.
After a few minutes of complete silence to Hen´s question, they all wore the same mixed expression of horror and guilt.
"Maybe one of us should try and call him?" Chim suggested.
"Don't bother." They all jumped at the sound of Maddie´s voice.
They all turned and stared at her, "Maddie? What are you doing here?" Chim asked and took a step towards her, when his attention was brought to the other people coming up the stairs and he stopped dead in his tracks, it didn't take long before Hen, Eddie and Bobby came and stood besides him.
"Buck wont be coming in." Athena said as she stood beside Maddie, she wore a hardened look in her eyes, the one usually reserved for whenever she was working.
"What does that mean Athena? Is Buck, okay?" Bobby asked with a worried expression on his face.
"He is fine, No thanks to any of you four idiots." Athena said as Karen stood on Athena´s other side.
All four firefighters stared at the three women standing in front them, when they noticed a fourth person standing behind them, only to be revealed as Chief Alonzo when Athena and Maddie each took a step to the left to make room for the chief. And if they thought the three women looked angry, it had nothing on the expression on the Chief´s face, who looked downright murderous.
"As of four pm last Tuesday firefighter Buckley had his last shift with the Los Angeles Fire department, and therefore he is no longer a part of the 118." Alonzo stated.
"He resigned?" Chim asked in disbelief and looked from Alonzo to Maddie and back again.
Both Bobby and Eddie stood frozen to the spot, Eddie barely heard Chim´s question over the roaring in his ears.
Buck had resigned, actually resigned. Buck who loved being a firefighter more then anything else in the world. Buck, who saw the 118 as his family and had fought like hell the past year to get back to them. It made no sense why he would quit. Which was probably why every inner alarm Eddie had, were blaring in his head.
"Firefighter Buckley came to me Monday morning before his shift started and told me everything. And I do mean EVERYTHING." Alonzo paused and glanced at each of them before settling on Bobby.
"I won't go into any details on what exactly he told me, but you should all know his reasons behind his resignation. He stated that he no longer felt safe doing his job." Alonzo shook her head and snorted. "Which I find very hard to believe, considering you haven't allowed him to do his actual job since he came back on active duty."
Bobby took a step back and looked over at his wife in disbelief, Hen placed her hand over her heart, tears had gathered in her eyes as she looked between Bobby and Alonzo and stuttered "What?"
Alonzo nodded, she kept looking straight at Bobby "Yes, firefighter Wilson. He didn't feel safe working with you, any of you here at the 118. I´ll be honest with you, I didn't understand it at first, considering how hard firefighter Buckley fought to come back here, to specifically work with all of you. But with all the incidents that I have been made aware of by Buckley himself as well as his sister and his mother I will say this, if I were Buckley I wouldn't just have resigned, I would have demanded you all be put on probation and the 118 to be put under investigation." She ended.
"What incidents?" Eddie half whispered while looking at Maddie.
Maddie shook her head and opened her mouth to answer but was interrupted by Athena who held her hand up.
"It doesn't matter." She answered.
"Athena…." Bobby started, looking as heartbroken as any of them had ever seen him.
"Don't bother asking. They wont tell you, and neither will i. All you should worry about, is what happens now." Alonzo said.
Charlotte, who was another firefighter on A-shift and had been sitting by the dinner table with Ravi snorted but covered it up with a fake cough and excused herself, sharing a brief glance with Alonzo.
As she walked by Athena, Maddie, and Karen she smiled "Tell Buck that he still has some family left here at the 118." She told Maddie, who responded with a small smile and a nod, Charlotte glanced back at Bobby, Eddie, Chim and Hen before she made her way down the stairs. Ravi did the same with a comforting smile to Maddie and followed behind Charlotte.
Eddie was shocked to notice that Charlotte didn't seem surprised to learn that Buck had resigned, nor was she surprised to see the chief or the three women at the firehouse.
Alonzo cleared her throat and got everyone´s attention back on her "Before we go into what will happen, you should all know that Firefighter Buckley defended you all and cashed in every favor he had with both me and the fire commissioner, and that is the only reason all of you wont be fired for misconduct, do I make myself clear on that?" She asked with a serious tone to her voice.
Eddie was shocked, he couldn't believe that Buck had not only resigned because he didn't feel safe working with them, but he had also fought for all of them to keep their jobs.
They all nodded as a response to the chief, so she continued "So lets move on to what happens now with the four of you. Each of you will go into therapy with the departments appointed therapist and until he has signed off on your return, you are all suspended without pay. Now Captain Nash, I have already dealt with three of your firefighters for their involvement with firefighter Buckley´s mistreatment. And if any you should be wondering, they have all been fired. Captain Nash, on top of your suspension and appointed therapy, you are also to attend 4 weeks of mandatory leadership training" Alonzo paused and took a deep breath.
"Now, Captain Nash if I were you, I would think long and hard about your leadership going forward and how you run this firehouse. As for the rest of you, do know that you are all hanging on to your jobs by a very thin thread." And with that she turned around and headed down the stairs.
They were all frozen to their spots staring after Chief Alonzo, when she was out of sight, they all looked at Karen, Maddie, and Athena who each wore an expression of utter disappointment.
"We have to talk to him." Hen said to Bobby, Eddie and Chim, they all nodded in response.
Bobby was about to suggest they go to his apartment to talk to Buck but was cut off by Maddie who had seemingly read his mind. "Don't bother going to his apartment, he is gone."
"What do you mean he is gone?" Hen asked, tears forming in her eyes.
Eddie felt like his heart was in his throat, he had a bad feeling about what it was ´gone´ meant but he wasn't about to say it out loud, in fear of it coming true.
"He left Los Angeles yesterday morning." She stated.
From the shocked expression on Athena and Karen´s faces, it was news to them as well, Maddie must have noticed because she gave them a small smile "He asked me not to tell you anything, he doesn't even know that you´re here with me, or that you both supported him with all of this."
"He just left without telling us?" Bobby asked.
"Why wouldn't he say something to us?" Chim asked at the same time.
Maddie´s eyes snapped to her boyfriend, a bitter laugh burst out of her "You know, when he said that all of you would react like this, I told him he was crazy, and that you would all be extremely worried about him and your first thought wouldn't be how to fix it, but what had happened to make him feel so unsafe that he would resign the job he loves so much. But jokes on me I guess."
"Where did he go?" Hen asked, the tears that had been threatening to fall, was now streaming down her face.
"You will never know. Not unless he specifically asks me to tell you, or if he tells you himself." She took a deep breath. "I will never forgive you for what you have done to my brother. You should be ashamed of yourselves! He saw you as family and this is how you repay him for fighting to come back to you after you lied to him and practically pushed him out of this family?" she practically screamed while looking at Bobby.
"Maddie, i…" Bobby started but was cut off my Maddie.
"NO! You don't get to apologize to me, not now, maybe not ever. He saw you as a father Bobby, and while yes. I wholeheartedly agreed with you that my brother acts without thinking most of the time, and that he should have taken more time off to heal after the truck bombing instead of pushing himself so hard. But he never asked you to lie to him, all he asked for you was for you to support him. He never asked any of you to abandon him like you did, using him as a babysitter or as your own personal shrink whenever you saw fit."
She shook her head and looked at Athena and Karen "He asked me to tell you to know that he loves you, and that you will always be his family, but he won't put you in a position where you feel like you have to choose between him and them. Which means it also applies to you. I´m sorry."
Karen nodded in understanding, Athena shook her head "That boy is too good for his own good." She stated before glaring at her husband.
"I really hope you are all happy." Karen said in a broken tone. "You broke the best man I have ever known. I don't know how you can live with yourselves right now." Hen let out a sob at that, Chim was looking on the verge of tears, and Bobby took a few steps back and collapsed on a chair.
And Eddie, he was still frozen to the spot, with ringing in his ear and his heart in his throat.
"There is another reason why I'm here." Maddie said, and got everyone´s attention, including Athena and Karen. She pulled out a stack of letters from her bag and held them in her hand.
"I´m also here because, even after everything you put my brother through, he still loves each and everyone of you, so here." She said as she handed them each a letter with their names on them.
To Eddie though, was a letter to him and one for Christopher.
"he asked me to give you all these, and to tell you that you can either throw them out or read them, and that he…" she paused and had to take a deep breath before she continued.
"That no matter what happens, he loves you, and he will never forget what each of you taught him, and that he will carry you all with him."
Hen was holding on to her letters like they were a lifeline and the answers to all of life´s mysteries. Tears were streaming down her face as she looked own at the floor.
Bobby was looking at the letter in his hand, his face drawn and pale as he was shakingly holding the letter.
Chim was staring at the floor, his eyes red rimmed and filled with tears.
And Eddie, who was feeling as if his heart was being ripped out of his chest, was staring at the dining room table where Buck used to sit during meals, only having one thought in his mind.
I just lost the love of my life.
9 years later. Buck´s POV.
"My love. It´s time." Lizzie said with a small smile.
"Lizzie, please, no." he begged "We have time."
She gently put her hand on his cheek and wiped away the tears that were streaming down his face.
"I want to meet them." She answered "It´s time my love, it´s time to make amends and be a family again."
He sighted, but nodded his head and took the hand she had on his cheek and brought it up to his lips and kissed her wedding band.
"Okay, fine. I love you." he said in a broken tone.