AN: Short chapter. I wrote this in one night. Insane when the juices are flowing.

And to the guest who asked: yes, we'll be going to Chicago to see Edward's parents.

Thanks to my Brina and May!! *heart eyes muthafucker*

Chapter Ten

-Give the Game Away-

Graduation night eight years ago

Edward was absolutely breathtaking; I couldn't get enough of him. His light gray suit accentuated his striking green eyes, which were mesmerizing. If he allowed it, I would have gazed upon them all day. He had styled his hair with gel to keep it under control, but throughout the graduation ceremony, his long fingers kept playing with it, resulting in a tangled mess by the end.

I watched him do it eighteen times since we arrived at Eagle's. He did it more often when he was uncomfortable. My mind pondered the softness of it and wanted to be his girl so I could grab it while he kissed me.

Unfortunately, I had to fantasize from afar. I sat with the parents while Em and Edward held court across the room. It was embarrassing to be singled out and forbidden to be seen anywhere near them. I felt like a kid - and Dad didn't help that situation by cheekily ordering me a Shirley Temple with extra cherries.

"Here you go, pumpkins. It's a cocktail for young ladies," he roared in front of seniors and juniors.

Of course, everyone laughed at me.

My best friends, Angela and Jessica, weren't subjected to this torture. They sat near the cool crowd and got all the details about the party that was going on after dinner.

Mom and Dad said I couldn't go, even though Emmett would be there. They said I was too young and blah, blah, blah.

Ugh! I'm fourteen, okay? I get it. I'm not old enough to drive, drink, vote, or be with the only boy I have ever loved. Why do I need the constant reminders?

The party was my last chance to tell Edward how I felt. He was leaving for college in two days, and I was going to Sedona with my family tomorrow. My parents had taken Emmett, his fiancée Rose, and me there as their graduation gift. I was excited to go, but the thought of never seeing Edward again scared me.

So, shortly after ten, my parents went to bed. I snuck out the back and met up with Angela and Jessica. We rode in Ben's car; he was Angela's boyfriend, who was older than us and could drive. The party was at Jared's house on the Quileute Reservation. I had dressed for the occasion, wearing my cutest skirt and most flirty top. I didn't have enormous boobs like Jess, but with the right push-up bra, they were perky and had decent cleavage.

"What's the plan, Belly?" Angela asked from the front seat, her head turned toward me as she peered over the top of her glasses. "When you find EC, then what?"

I shrugged and fiddled with the teddy bear that I had bought for him. "All I know is I can't let my brother see me. He'll flip out and probably make me go home."

Jessica was less skeptical than I was and more of a cheerleader. "You need to offer him your V-card. Guys love that shit."

I smiled as my face blushed crimson. "Yeah, right."

I was not opposed to the idea, but Edward wasn't just some guy and wouldn't take it anyway. He never showed any interest, and I was a kid to him. It was frustrating, and I wished I was older – or blonde. That seemed his type; Kate and Tanya were that bleached, bottled kind. I begged my mom to let me do it this year, but she gave me some crap about my dull brown being so beautiful. I stopped listening. Instead, I tried home remedies. Jessica said lemon juice worked to lighten hair, but that was false. First, Forks doesn't get enough sun to make it effective, and all that ended up happening was it made the strands hard and smelled like lemon. I did try the hydrogen peroxide, but was smart enough to test it on a piece I cut off, and again, not the results I wanted, so I gave up.

Once we got to the party, Jessica split off to mingle with the crowd, Angela and Ben found a couch to make out on, and I was left in the corner, clutching a teddy bear. The show out was impressive, and I was surprised that Jared had organized it. Quileute kids didn't attend our school in Forks, but they had graduated years ago and probably just wanted a reason to get drunk. I stayed away from that scene; the one time I drank was embarrassing, and I refused to have a repeat—especially since I was on a mission to declare my love.

That's why I needed to stop stalling and get my bootie in gear. I stood on my tiptoes to see over the sea of teenagers to locate the distinctive bronze mop, but he wasn't there. It was discouraging, and when I spotted Rose and Emmett in the kitchen and no Edward, I feared he had already gone home.

In the last few months, I noticed a change in him. No one else did, but I doubted they paid as close attention to him as I did. It was tiny, yet when he smiled, it wasn't the same. Before this year, Edward's laugh was loud and boisterous, and his smile showed all his perfect teeth, but now? If he laughed, it was a chuckle, and his smile was closed, only turning up at the corners. I wondered if Emmett not going to college with him was the cause. They've been joined at the hip for as long as I can remember.

"Where's EC?" someone in the crowd of bodies asked.

The person replied, "Last time I saw him, he was heading out back."

"Leave him be," Emmett said.

That was the end of the conversation, and typically, I wouldn't want to bother him, but I was running out of time.

"Now or never, Belly." I whispered and ducked out toward the backyard.

A few partygoers were on the porch, and some had even started a fire in the underground pit, but as I scanned the faces, not one was Edward. Further, I walked past the trees and toward the La Push beach. The moon was full, giving me adequate light to find my way, and it didn't take me long to see a figure sitting in the sand.

I gripped the bear and held my breath, slowly approaching. Edward was tossing a football into the air and catching it as he stared out into the ocean. I was quiet, but a branch under my foot snapped, and he whipped his head towards the sound. My body froze, not knowing what to do – should I run?

Edward's startled expression eased into a relaxed one, and he smiled. "What are you doing here, Bruiser?"

"Ummm." I shot my hand out with the bear and stammered. "I wanted to give you this."

"Okay," Edward said, setting the football down in the sand and standing up. With one step of his long legs, he towered over me. He then took the teddy bear from my hand. "Congratulations, Graduating Class of 2014," he read aloud.

It was a silly gift, but it was all I could afford with my meager allowance.

I tried to yank it back. "You're right, it's lame."

Edward lifted it over his head. "Too late, Bruiser."

"You don't have to keep it," I said, jumping up to grab it, but he was too tall, and I ran out of breath. "It's a dumb gift."

"No take-backs," he said, placing his other hand on my head and keeping me planted on my feet. "I like it. Thanks."

I huffed. "You're welcome." And, like the cowardly chicken that I was, I turned to leave. "Well, I'll see you later."

"Wait," Edward said, grabbing my arm, and as I looked at him in shock, totally stunned by the tingles, he dropped his hand. "Does Emmett know you're here?"

My grimace was the answer.

He tilted his head in a reprimanding manner. "Let me guess, Renee and Charlie have no idea either, do they?"

I whispered, "I snuck out."

"Evidently," he said, rolling his eyes. "Look, hang out with me for a few minutes, and then I'll drive you home."

"Are you sure?" I asked, but the desperation in my voice came out as a high-pitched question.

"Jesus Christ, Bruiser," he said, annoyed, grabbing my shirt sleeve and tugging me forward. "Yes, I'm sure."

I gulped back my nerves and nodded. "Okay."

We sat where he had left his football, keeping a barrier between us. I stared out into the blackness of the sea and listened to him breathe. Even though Edward saw me as a little kid, I didn't think our age gap mattered much. Every year after my birthday, for about two months, we were technically three years apart. So, while I was only fourteen, Edward was still only seventeen. He couldn't vote either. Of course, in a week or so, that would change, but at that moment, nothing was illegal or immoral.

"I didn't know you were such a rule breaker," Edward said, gently bumping his shoulder with mine.

"Yeah, well," I said, tucking my hair behind my ears, "I'm growing up and can't be a square all my life."

He looked at me, and I saw this from my peripheral vision; it took everything in me not to react, keeping my gaze fixed on the moon.

"Sneaking out this week, next week you might even say 'fuck.'" Edward said.

I gasped at the language. "No way, I could never say that."

He laughed. "You're so weird about not saying curse words. What's up with that?"

"I'm not weird. I just don't feel the need to express myself by using offensive language."

"Hmm," Edward said, moving closer to me. I flinched a little when he threw his arm over my shoulders. "Do you get offended when people curse around you?"

I shake my head. "People can say what they want. I'm not the word police."

"Thank fuck," he said, pulling me into a headlock and gently rubbing his knuckles into my scalp. "I would hate it if you hated me."

However, when he cursed, I did feel something – especially that "F" word. He had put a lot of emphasis on the end of it. It was a harsh sound. I liked that word when it was in the context of sex. If Edward had said that to me then, and in that manner, I would not have hesitated to give him my V-card.

"Pssh," I said as soon as he released me. "I could never hate you."

He smiled, and it was all teeth; the first one I had seen in weeks. "I could never hate you, either."

I smiled back but had to look away; his stare was too intense. "That's good," I said, fiddling with my hair. "You're important to me."

That brought back the brooding look on Edward's face as he straightened his back and locked eyes with the sea. "Next year, you'll be in high school," he said.

"Yeah, ninth grade," I said, and without him there, I didn't see the point. "Jess and Ang are excited, but they at least attracted the opposite sex. I'm a mutant."

Edward laughed, and I glowered at him. He raised his hands in surrender. "Hey, you said it. I just thought it was funny."

I rolled my eyes. "Ha-ha," I said, immediately thinking that if I had blonde hair, maybe he would want to date me. "Every guy stays far away from me."

"Good," Edward murmured, more to himself than me, but I heard him nonetheless.

So, I twisted my body to face his and called him out. "How's that good?"

Edward sighed and cracked his knuckles. "Bruiser," he said, "none of these losers in Forks are worth your time. It's a blessing that you don't have to keep turning them down."

"What makes you so sure I would turn any of them down?"

He picked up the bear and smiled. "Call it a hunch."

My cheeks flushed on my face, and I quickly changed the subject. "Are you excited about going to college?"

He shrugged. "I guess so."

"What do you mean? This is a big deal, EC. You got a full ride to Notre Dame! You get to leave Forks and go to Indiana -"

"Don't call me 'EC,'" he interjected, his tone severe, causing me to shrink away.

"I'm sorry."

He muttered, "Fuck," as he ran his hands aggressively through his hair. When he spoke again, it was softer. "EC doesn't exist to you, Bella—you're not some chick slobbering over me." He dug a hole in the sand between his feet and placed the bear into it. "Edward. That's who you got this gift for, and who I am to you, okay?"

"Okay," I said, but I felt embarrassed, and the tension between us was uncomfortable. Sometimes, my dumb mouth got me into trouble. "So, Notre Dame."

"And I'm not going to Notre Dame," he interjected.

I was stunned. "What? Since when?"

He said, "About a month ago I committed to the University of Washington and will be playing football for them."

My jaw dropped. That was the school he and Emmett had planned on going to until Rose got pregnant; however, then Edward's parents redirected his focus.

"Wow, that's great," I said. That was only four hours away. Edward didn't smile or anything. "You could get drafted into the NFL."

He said, "Maybe."

The enthusiasm I had expected wasn't there; that was the change I had witnessed for months.

"Do you not want that?"

"I do, but it was just that..." He glanced at me, his eyes flickering between my eyes, mouth, and breasts, but quickly looked away. "It's going to suck without Emmett there."

"Ah," I said, disappointed that it was my brother he would miss and not me. "I figured that's what had been bothering you."

His green eyes turned to mine and made my heart beat faster. "You've been watching me, Bruiser?" He smirked, gently poking me in the side.

"No," I said, denying it and slapping his hand away.

He said teasingly, "You're still in love with me, aren't you?" His tickling became more energetic as he attacked my knees.

I was out of my mind, feeling flushed by his touch and overwhelmed by the slight discomfort of the tickles. As I blurted out the truth, I laughed and pushed against him. "Yes!" I exclaimed. "Yes, I'm still madly in love with you."

There wasn't a hint of playfulness or sarcasm.

Edward stopped and stared at me. "No, you're not," he said.

I brushed my hair out of my face, and as much as I wanted to, I didn't shy away from him. "I love you, Edward," I said, "and not like a brother, but like a boyfriend."

There was an unreadable expression in his eyes. I couldn't regret telling him, though - it was the whole reason for coming to this party and seeking him out. The silence between us grew awkward. It felt like two lifetimes, even though, realistically, it was less than a minute.

He said, "You're not joking."

"That's why I came here tonight," I whispered quietly, staring down at my hands. "I love you and want to be with you," I added.

"Oh, god damn it, Bruiser!" he groaned.

"Sorry," I mumbled, and when I snuck a glance his way, Edward was rubbing his forehead, seemingly annoyed. My heart deflated, and I got up. "Sorry," I repeated and continued to stand there. Even though he wanted nothing to do with me, I was afraid to let him go. Two whole minutes went by, and he never spoke another word. That was the answer I received, and it broke my heart, but it was time to move on. "Goodbye, Edward."

Present day

Edward says to me, "I'm in love with you." His eyes are the palest green I have ever seen.

The words I've waited so long to hear impact me so profoundly that I almost faint. The panic on his face is understandable as I limp into his arms. He holds me and carries me over to the couch. I feel woozy, but when he puts water to my lips, I can sit up and drink. My eyes peered at him over the rim of the glass; he was anxiously running his hands through his hair. I wanted to tell him I felt the same, but I was trying to process what he had declared first. It felt like a dream, and part of me was worried that I was still asleep, and when I woke up, Edward and this baby would be gone. This started another wave of emotions, and I gulped down the water to keep it all together. When I was finished, I wordlessly held out the empty glass to him, and he rushed to refill it. As he was turning away from me, I pinched myself – hard.

"Ah!" I hiss. "Ouch."

Edward hears this and abruptly shifts his concerned eyes back to me. "Honey, what's wrong?" He leaves the glass by the sink and quickly joins me on the couch. His hand instinctively goes to my stomach. "Everything okay?"

My one hand cover his as the other one cups his face. "We're fine."

He lets out a relieved breath and leans into my touch. "Thank God."

"You know, I haven't stopped loving you," I say. He shakes his head like he doesn't believe me. "What I told you on that beach was just as true then as it is now."

Edward's gaze falls away from mine. "I made a lot of mistakes in my life, but that one is my biggest one."

"What do you mean?"

"That first night at your apartment, when I said I only saw you as a kid."

I narrowed my eyes slightly. "So, that night on the beach..."

He rubs the back of his neck and still doesn't look at me. "You made it hard for me to let you go."

"But you did let me go," I say, and there's a touch of anger in my tone.

"Just because you didn't look like a kid, honey, doesn't mean you weren't one." He moves closer and overwhelms my senses, trying to distract and confuse me. "I couldn't allow myself to take advantage of you like that."

Oh, I smile and say, "My God, are you telling me, if I had pushed the issue like Jess told me to, you would have taken my v-card on that beach?"

He looks at me now, and his eyes are dilated, less green and more black, as shame and arousal run through him. "What?"

"Babe," I say, shaking my head and laughing, "why do you think I dressed the way I did? The teddy bear was just an excuse to talk to you. If you had kissed me that night, all I'm saying is..." I don't finish and leave him to ponder the possibilities.

He groans, and his face goes straight to my chest. Wrapping his arms around me, he says, "I hated myself for wanting you that night." His voice is muffled as he continues, "I felt like a creep. It was even worse when I thought about your legs and...your tits while I was..." And he trailed off, but I got the gist.

"So, is that the first time you thought of me like that?" I ask, my fingers lazily going through his hair. He shakes his head. "Really? When was the first time?"

Edward's grip on me tightens, but he remains reluctant.

"If I share my first sexual fantasy with you, will you share yours with me?"

He removes his head from my chest just enough to look up at me. "Deal."

I smile. "You're so easy."

"And you're stalling," he says, shifting his body so we are face to face again.

"All right, so it was after we watched John Carter," I say, and his forehead scrunches. "You shared your popcorn with me, and our fingers kept touching." I pause, and his eyebrows go up as he starts getting an idea of where I'm going. "And so, whenever I put my fingers inside myself, I would imagine they were yours."

"Fuck," he says, gripping the side of my jeans and practically yanking me onto his lap. "You can't tell me that."

"Your turn," say, my hands going to his face and tilting it upward. "That's the deal."

His cheeks turn red. "You can't judge me."

"Why would I judge you?"

He says, "Because I was looking at you that way when I shouldn't have."

My lips brush against his as I whisper. "Try me."

His eyes are still on mine as he takes a deep breath and says, "It was at my pool party."

I gasp. "When my top came off?" He nods, and there's such shame in his eyes. My heart races. "Did you...see anything?"

"Just...," he says, raising his hand, and his thumb and forefinger coming together with less than a centimeter separating them, "...a smidge."

"And you liked what you saw?" I say teasingly.

He smirks sheepishly. "They were nice."

"Were?"

He laughs. "They are 'present tense' nice."

"They just came out that summer," I tell him, oddly proud of that.

"Yeah," he blushed again, but never looked away from me, "I noticed, honey. Every guy at my party noticed."

"And that's why you got mad and sent me home?" I ask.

"I wasn't mad at you, but I was fifteen—remember, I had seen you the day before wearing Smurf pajamas and looking like a kid. Suddenly, you came to my house wearing a hot pink bikini that showed curves I didn't know you had. I..." He huffs, pinching the bridge of his nose, and I feel him grow beneath me.

There was a time after I arrived when Edward went missing, and no one could find him.

"Oh, my God!" My hand covers my mouth, and I whisper, "Did you jack off that day?"

He peers up at me, guilt-ridden. "I might have."

I'm smiling from ear to ear. "You so wanted me."

And finally, after all this time, I realized my infatuation wasn't one-sided; it was just unreciprocated.

The stress of his feelings for me back then caused him grief now. "Yes, I did," he said, "but there was no way I could ever act on them. You were just a - "

I placed my hand over his mouth. "If you call me 'kid' again, I will hurt you."

He chuckles. When I take my hand away, he says, "You were younger than me."

"I'm still younger than you."

"You know what I mean, honey."

It's hard to understand because I don't see it like he does. "Technically, you're only three years and ten months older than me."

He smiles. "I am well aware of the math."

The little moments between us are starting to come back into focus.

"At my dance," I say, and watched him closely, "you told Emmett about this girl you wanted to kiss."

"You little eavesdropper."

I ignored his distraction tactics. "Was that girl me?"

"Yes," he says. "In hindsight, I'm glad I didn't, but yeah, I wanted to kiss you."

"You should have kissed me."

"Honey, you think we have problems with Emmett now? Imagine the shit he'd give me if I kissed his thirteen-year-old sister? I liked you, but I loved you more."

My heart dropped. "You loved me?"

"Since we were kids, but I didn't realize that's what it was until we saw each other again."

"And all that," I say, waving my hand around me, indicating our recent fight, "about not wanting to date me?"

"Bullshit - every word of it. I was the main pusher of scaring those tools away from you. Emmett, kind of, just went along why it."

I glared, feeling another argument coming on. "And yet you dated whoever you wanted? Like that didn't kill me or anything."

Kate was the one who bothered me the most. He took her to prom and she posted all these manipulated pictures of them together and what their babies would look like - okay, she might have been crazy, but I was young and easily devastated.

"I'm sorry." His smile is weak with sympathy. "I was a selfish asshole. It wasn't fair to you."

My eyebrows quirk up in surprise. "Where's the 'but' in that sentence?"

He doesn't answer that question and moves on to another confession. "I lied about Rose showing me those pictures—I mean, she did, but I had already seen them."

"You've been stalking me ever since you left for college," I say, not even surprised at this point, just kind of, sad and disappointed.

"It's not stalking when you're the only one on my feed."

I opened my mouth to argue that he had three people on his Facebook page when I realized he'd muted the other two. "Waste of time, Edward."

Eight long years of separation, and for what?

"I didn't know it was," he says, and my face instantly turns to anger, causing him to quickly try to explain himself. "Look, I was an idiot, okay? I struggled with liking you for a long time. Yeah, age didn't matter to you, but when I'm nineteen and in college, you're fifteen and still in high school? Honey, we were so different mentally. I didn't want to be selfish and take advantage of your crush on me."

"It was more than a crush," I say, brushing his hands away when he moves to hold me. "On that beach, I told you how much I loved you, and you acted annoyed."

"Yes, I was annoyed with the situation we were in," he says, flustered, but I cross my arms over my chest and stare at him. He sighs. "I was two days from leaving Forks and somehow convinced myself that what I felt for you was silly. Once I was away from you, that would be it! We would both move on, but when you showed up looking like you did with that fucking teddy bear, all my resolve went poof—just gone. Then you go and tell me that you're in love with me? I had to do the right thing and separate myself from you."

I'm trying to understand his reasoning, and a more rational part of me does, but the lovesick teenager in me is furious. "And so, you're in love with me, but can move on to marry another girl - how does that even make sense? I never stopped loving you. Even when I dated those guys, I always thought of you."

"If I had known your feelings for me were still there after you graduated high school and started college, I would have done something about it!" he says, and there's regret there.

"But…" I say, drawing it out, hopefully to coax him into more truths.

"But when I saw you posting about your relationships, you looked happy. I figured I had missed my shot. So, I tried to move on, and Gigi distracted me for a while, but like an idiot, I logged onto Facebook for the first time in two years, and there you fucking were." He cups my face, and I let him. "I'm sorry, I wasted our time, and for the life of me now, I can't figure out why."

"Cause like me, you think too dang much."

He laughs. "And honestly, honey? We can go back and forth about this until one of us dies, but it doesn't change the fact that I'm in love with you."

My breath gets snatched from my lungs as he says those words again. I'll never, ever get tired of hearing them. "You love me?" I whisper.

He smiles. "Yes, I do—without a fucking question. What I need to know is, are you in love with me?"

I cover his hands with mine and close my eyes, nodding. "I am very much in love with you."

Edward says, "That's all that matters." As he presses his lips to mine.

The kiss is slow and tender, and it expresses all those feelings we've secretly harbored for years. It wasn't ever one-sided, unreciprocated, or just a childhood crush; it was true love, patiently waiting for the right moment.

The End

Just kidding.

So, I get where Edward's mindset is. In those early years, boys and girls are so different in mental and developmental stages. He was trying to do the right thing, even though he did stupid shit, like cockblock the boys, but that was his immaturity. At the end of the day, he really tried to be a good guy. He just wasted their time, unfortunately.