"I get up!" But Alice knocked me down! "Nuh uh, not today Greg." She said.
Hold on why is she still in my room?
"Alice did you watch me sleep? Hold on the other side of the bed is warm…"
Alice started to blush as I realized where she's been sleeping.
"Alice? Did you?" I stutter while blushing as well.
"Listen Greg, I put you in bed because you were mad drunk last night, but I was sleepy myself and before I knew it I dozed off!" Alice explained in a hurry.
"Nah I think someone poisoned us." I say. "What? Huh?" Alice said confused.
"To start: I don't get drunk like that easily, I have a high alcohol resistance and people don't fall asleep like that so quick easy." I conclude.
"But who would do something like that?" Alice asked.
"It's probably someone who ships us and made us fall asleep together." I explain.
Meanwhile a little further away.
"See? Their so cute together!" Reisen awed.
"You need to calm down because I'm not doing this again." Eirin said.
"Aww one more time please?"
"Nope." And with that she walked away.
"Damn it! Worth a try though." Suddenly the speakers of the hospital turned on. "ATTENTION ALL HIGHER-RANKING BEINGS, REPORT TO THE DISCUSSION ROOM!"
"Ah look we got that too to deal with!" Reisen sighed.
"I think it's red! He's sus!"
"Greg, what are you rambling about?" Reimu said.
"Oh shoot sorry that was my amongus PTSD since this is an emergency meeting." "Alright let's get to the point." Yukari said and explained what she with Remilia and Koakuma talked about.
"So that's why I never got a lightsaber for Christmas!, DAMN YOU SANTA!" I insult.
"I can kill Santa?" Flandre asked.
"Apparently you can, you're the perfect weapon of destruction." Koakuma answered. "Can't you replace Lucifer's coat with acid with a snap of a finger?" Marisa asked.
"It's not that simple, especially if I go up against Lucifer."
"Anyways, I think I have an idea. Since Lucifer isn't Adve he's going to be much easier to kill than Adve, so I'm going back up to heaven to train because it's been a while anyway." I say as I take my leave. "Y'all better do something too! Cya!"
And I walked off.
"And there he goes, without a care in the world. He's an idiot." Alice said.
"But you really do like him though." Marisa said.
"O-oh I-it's not like that!" Alice stuttered.
"Wow, you kept me waiting here all bored." Tenshi said.
"Sorry if it has been a while miss Tenshi, however I managed to win 3 big battles all thanks to you!" I complimented.
"Hm! That's more like it! Seems like I trained you well, want some more divine training from the greatest celestial?" Tenshi praised herself.
"Let's get to training shall we?" I trained with Tenshi for the next 11 days 11 hours 11 minutes and 11 seconds. Dodging keystones, sword strikes and earthquakes.
Until the time came that I beat her. "Greg, it's time for training!" "Phase!"
"Huh? Greg?" "Until death!" However Tenshi blocked with a summoned keystone. "Not bad, not bad" she said amused by my sudden attack.
"Let's see if you can dodge these old rocks from heaven in a more professional way!" Tenshi summoned a bunch of new keystones and threw them at me.
I jumped on one incoming keystone and then to another that came right at me then I until deathed the others that were fired close to each other and landed safely.
"One acknowledges your talent!" Tenshi spoke.
"However what about close combat attacks!"
She summoned her sword and lashed at me, but I dodged with my phase ability.
She then hit my mechanical hand, so I took this opportunity to stop the next strike with it and grabbed the sword, but she overpowered me and threw me away directly after she threw the sword and this time I catch it with my mechanical hand again but after one second it got too heavy and let the sword go but letting me fall with it.
"The sword of Hisou can only be used by celestials, but you managed to hold it.
Even if it was only one second you did something not even a high-ranking youkai could do!" Tenshi said.
"Thanks, that means I'm one of the strongest here too now!" I say.
"Hmm want to face my true strength now? Hah! No saying no! Here's my best!" Tenshi said while the ground underneath was rumbling!
The final challenge has begun, and I dodged the incoming shattering earth beneath me, after that I climbed out of a sinkhole in seconds and lastly destroyed a created mountain with my highest until death yet, without my buff ability!
"Heh, heh, hard training, and eating peaches, make me like a god!"
I breathlessly spoke.
"I Tenshi the greatest celestial am proud to see you, once a mere human rise up and be worthy of the rank second-in-command celestial yourself!"
"Woah! You mean it?!" I asked excitedly. "I know of your rule-breaking power and your 'Great'o mighty' magical buff, with that power you are certainly strong enough to lift my divine sword!" Tenshi explained.
"How did you know about my abilities?" I ask.
"Your mechanical hand is made of an ancient metal long lost to time, every gear every nail, it's all enchanted. Alice made it for you right? She has no clue what she used to make your arm." Tenshi said while inspecting my arm.
"Wow, I didn't know, she did say it was magical though?
Maybe she did know?" I interview her.
"Well if she didn't know it would make more sense, but if she did… yeah I wouldn't know myself ask her." She admitted.
"Hey Tenshi, you hear that?" I say.
What I hear was, oh dear it is jingle bells!
"Tenshi, listen I got to go now! Winter is coming!"
Yukari stood ready, Remilia, Reimu, Marisa and Koakuma by her side on top of youkai mountain awaiting the demon that is Lucifer, the fallen angel, or just Santa Clause.
"I hope your plan works Yukari!" Reimu said.
"Oh Reimu dear my plans are all perfect, wouldn't you agree?" Yukari teased.
"I have a really bad feeling about this!" Maria said.
"Ah quit being negative girls, what happens to good old fighting back in the day?
You two really liked invading the mansion when it was still here!" Yukari argued.
"Ha ha, good one old hag!" Remilia said.
"Look who's talking!" Yukari scoffed. "I am quite young dear, but of course I'm old to you but 17 years of age is a big number for children!"
"I am not a child!" Remilia shouted.
"Stop fighting! Lucifer is approaching!" Koakuma said.
"Ho ho ho! Merry go fuck yourself!" Clause spoke out from his demonic carriage with hellhounds carrying the disturbing vessel.
Santa looked like normal Santa, excluding his glowing red eyes.
"You're all on my naughty list my little children! Let me teach you a lesson for standing in my way!"
Santa grabbed his magical bag and grabbed a quad launcher and shot rockets at the girls. "HO HO! TASTE MY COOKIES OF DEATH!"
Yukari made splits right in front of the incoming rockets and made them disappear. "Not so fast Santa my dear, I wouldn't have fun fighting you if I weren't 'present' hmm?"
"YUKARI NO TIME FOR OLD HAG JOKES!" Reimu yelled. While in anger she casted fantasy seal while Santa pulled out a massive bell and ringing it.
"HELLS BELLS!" He said. The ringing of the bell shattered the magic forming into fantasy seal and while everyone was distracted by his bell he grabbed a large golden staff with a spiral shape on the end of the staff. "He-he-hellraiser!" He summoned a gigantic eyeball made out of fire.
Marisa summoned her large laser beam and Yukari directed it with her splits while Koakuma enhanced the magical power of the laser to destroy the eye and hopefully Lucifer while at it.
However it did destroy the eye, Santa dodged it and now summoned another gigantic thing, a gingerbread man!
Koakuma knew exactly what to do and summoned her gigantic mansion to counter the gingerbread man.
The mansion quickly struck a blow into the head of the gingerbread man, but Santa used his bell to distort the magic that kept the mansion together.
"Ho Ho ho, you have some nerve to betray your king!" Lucifer said.
"I never wanted to do what you asked! I'm sticking up for myself!" Koakuma shouted. "Then me dragging you back to hell will be your fate!" He taunted.
"That's for me to decide!" Remilia dive bombed with a red magic spear causing Santa to be off guard to dodge it. Yukari secretly placed a two splits by his shoulders while he's still off guard and closed them decapitating his arms. "AHH! MERE MORTALS!"
"That's it I'm done with the magic of Christmas!" Lucifer said as his great white beard transformed into fire, and the red-whited coat into a black-red one, and his arms regenerated back. "It's time for your last Christmas!" Lucifer spoke.
"Alright now!" Reimu yelled as a zeppelin suddenly appeared and shot its laser cannons directly at Lucifer.
Reisen was flying the restored zeppelin used to attack Eientei.
"How about that for your magic distortion?" Marisa taunted Lucifer.
"Ah, figured Koakuma told you about my magic distortion power." Lucifer said as he dodged the incoming laser blasts until he actually got hit by one blast allowing the rest of the barrage to hit him.
"My sister isn't the only one that can kill you!" Remilia taunted.
Lucifer stopped the incoming fire with a barrier of flames above him.
Heavily wounded he used a demonic recovery spell to heal him up but got interrupted by Kaguya with Gru's freeze ray.
But quickly the ice began to crack, enough time for Flandre to arrive.
"Hello Santa!" She said looking at Lucifer who was frozen in shock (literally). "You underestimated us greatly" she added as she destroyed Lucifer who shattered in thousands of pieces and evaporated in the air.
"Good thing me and my spiritual companions didn't need to help in the battle!" I complemented the crew who defeated Lucifer. "Breg! I did it! I killed the leader of hell!" Flandre said while jumping up in excitement right in front of my face. "Something does seem off however, I'm still feeling dread." Yukari said.
"I agree something seems amiss here."
I agreed. Suddenly a piece of the ground busted up in the air with fire spewing from the hole that was created when the ground went up.
"When you kill Lucifer, he's reborn back in hell,
allowing ME to kill him! IDIOTS!" Adve came out of the fire with a smile that only that fat fuck could make.
Koakuma frighteningly leaped behind us.
"He's here!" She shivered.
Reisen shot lazes from the zeppelin up above at Adve, but he used a split to cover him and fired back using another portal.
The zeppelin couldn't handle its own blasts and got shot down.
Taking quick action, Remilia flew up quickly to save Reisen from the chasing zeppelin. "Gonna try something else? Like using your newfound power received from training?" Adve asked me. "How did you know?"
"I can read your idiotic mind, ah enough talking, NOT ENOUGH KILLING!"
Adve said as he suddenly decreased our distance and went for punching me.
I put a stop one punch coming at me by using my mechanical arm and used "UNTIL DEATH!" To crush his fist.
"AHH, YOU LITTLE SHIT!" Adve said and countered with stopping time.
"Hah, my turn!" He said as he went for another punch, but Sakuya appeared from behind and struck him with 50 knives making him stop is time stop.
"Of COURSE you can resist the time stop ability!"
Adve snapped while his eyes turned red.
"Is that? Lunatic red eyes?" Sakuya asked.
"Reisen is a resident of Gensokyo after all." Adve responded after making Sakuya insane but with Sakuya's last sane braincells she knocked herself out.
While I used a combo of phase and until death to catch Adve off guard but before I could strike he used master spark however Yukari's split blocked the attack and struck back with another split from above that Adve managed to dodge on time and counter attacked with manipulating the wind to push Yukari and the rest who haven't attacked yet excluding me due to me holding on to the ground with my strength.
"So you're still STANDING IN NY WAY?!" Adve said angrily. "Your friends fell off the mountain, no backup for you anymore."
I grin at that comment. "You think so?"
LEGEND SPIRIT NUMBER 4!
YOU ARE NOT PREPARED FOR!
ADAM!
"Welcome back."
"Oh it feels good to beat the shit out of these fucking idiots that try to become stronger than life!" Adam stretched his body and began his wake-up exercise.
"Hold on, give me a minute!" He said while doing push-ups.
Adve was in disbelief.
"Who the hell is this excuse of a spirit companion, I'm dissatisfi-." Adam suddenly rushed towards Adve with his guitar-axe.
He sliced but missed so he used his left hand to punch Adve in the face making him fly in the air.
Making use of Adve's disadvantage Adam summoned his portal and used his guitar-axe to critically hit him and hit the chest.
And with nothing to lose I hit him from behind with an until death punch and that blow destroyed his insides.
Adve was astonished, healing himself he got back up.
"Good job, you're too fun to play with Greg!
I'm going to give this win to you yet again. Next time I'll go harder on you." Adve said as he hopped into a split back to wherever his evil lair is.
"Heh he ran! What a pussy!" Adam insulted.
"That's how he is I guess." I said. At this moment the rest who've been fighting Lucifer had returned to the mountain.
"Huh? Adams still alive? Yuyuko told me he passed on." A confused Reimu said.
"Oh he did but I never chose my 4th spirit so I could make Adam a spirit." I explained "Heh and the plan worked, back alive and kicking ass!" Adam said proudly.
I could see Koakuma hiding behind a rock from Adam, oh shoot that's right she's still a demon after all.
"Hey Adam, now that you're here I want to test out my spirit store ability, I haven't gotten to use it at any point yet but if you are in my spirit storage I can summon you whenever I'm in danger." I ask him.
"Huh you never used it before? Fine I'll be the first then!" Adam agreed.
"Spirit store!" And Adam's body glowed blue and split up in thousands of blue particles that went inside my body.
"Huh, feels kinda weird. Anyway Koakuma you can come out now!"
Koakuma came out from her hiding place.
"Thank you guys so much for defeating Lucifer for me." She thanked.
"Nah it's alright, he was quite weak compared to Adve after all!" Marisa said.
"That's right, speaking off. What is he up to?" Reimu asked.
"Don't ask me, I don't know." I said. "Hold on a minute, look at the large hole Adve made from… hell?" I added confused.
"Hey that hole leads to old hell, Lucifer really hasn't been in hell for a while." Reimu said. "Huh? The fuck you mean OLD HELL?! There's another hell? Did the pit of fire need renovations?"
"They moved because of overpopulation." Yukari answered.
"Overpopulation? Huh? I thought people don't want to be eternally in hell suffering and you're telling me it's old because of OVERPOPULATION?! Nah hells gotten to be a secret paradise or something, you got me curious I'm heading down!"
"Huh you're what?" Was everyone's reaction.
"You heard me. Hell is got to be a secret heaven if there was an overpopulation, hell here I come!" I said while doing a cannonball.
"And there he goes again, indeed" Reimu said this time.
"HEY! Who blew this, drop down to hell?" Sanae asked who came up to see the damage of the battle. She nor Kanako agreed for the battle area to be at the top of the mountain where also their shrine is, so she was understandably mad.
"Sorry Sanae, Adve came and-." Marisa spoke but Sanae jumped down the hole. "Yeah whatever Ill clean this up myself!" she said while she jumped down the massive pit leading to old hell. "Idiots." Reimu sighed.