Chapter 7 - Severus

Severus left Dumbledore's office for his private quarters feeling furious with everyone.

No one understood him. No one liked him. But they never took the time to understand him.

Like Sirius-sodding-Black they preferred to make fun of him, forget about him, write him off.

He knew the students did it. How many times had he deducted house points from some smart arse or other for poking fun at the size of his nose?

The most irksome thing was it wasn't even his nose. He'd inherited it from his father, and what a good-for-nothing useless waste of space he had been. The constant reminder of the man was torture, particularly so as Sirius Black was so immature as to never let him forget it.

"I heard Voldemort's in the market for a new nose, Snivelly." The idiot had said one night after an Order meeting. "Think he might tell you what he's up to if you offer him yours?"

"He does tell me what he's up to." Severus spat.

He knew Black was less than impressed by the lack of information he provided to the Order on the Dark Lord. Presumably that was why the stupid buffoon and his stooge had gone behind his back and appointed Wormtail the spy.

"H-hello, Severus." The pathetic rat had said to him at a recent death eater meeting.

It was rare that the Dark Lord attended these meetings. He preferred for his followers to prepare the plans and then he would review them with one or two individuals. This one was being led by Yaxley. He had murdered a rich muggle family in order to use their large dining room for the occasion.

Severus didn't know how Wormtail had warranted an invitation to the meeting. None of the death eaters thought much of him, and some actively mistrusted him, thinking that as it was on his orders that Voldemort had gone to the Potters, he'd had some sort of hand in his downfall.

He must have managed to have convinced enough of them of his loyalty to allow him to attend at least some of the meetings though.

Severus hated that this cowardly worm was being tasked with reporting on death eater activity as much as he was. He wasn't going to make things any easier for the man. He turned his back on him.

"Let us come to order." Came the sharp voice of Corban Yaxley from the head of the table.

Severus had identified some sort of a game or competition amongst the death eaters. Each meeting would be chaired by a different member and it seemed to be an opportunity for them all to attempt to one-up each other in the process.

"Chateux Margaux?" Yaxley said lazily, levitating an expensive looking bottle of wine into the centre of the table, where it poured itself into a dozen or so crystal glasses. "Drink up. It's on the house." He gave a nasty smile.

"So, point one on the agenda, our comrades in Azkaban…"

Severus listened carefully as the death eaters began to discuss how to set free those who had been re-captured after the debacle at the ministry of magic the previous summer.

It must have been embarrassing for them all, having been bested by six teenagers, but they were of course determined to put the error right. He made a note to tell Albus to double his efforts with Scrimgeour on getting more human guards at Azkaban. It was quite clear that the dementors were on Voldemort's side.

"Will you deliver the notes to the Dark Lord?" Travers asked Yaxley as the meeting was called to an end.

"Yes." Yaxley said shortly. "He trusts me."

Severus snorted. The Dark Lord trusted no one. He and Severus had that in common. He wondered if this had been part of his draw towards the dark wizard in his youth. Voldemort operated alone, yet he was undeniably brilliant. He had many followers and admirers but he didn't need anyone to be a success.

He could see now why that idea had been so captivating to him as a young boy.

Severus had never really had friends. His only true friend had ever been Lily Evans. She had seen something in him that if he hadn't been so selfish and bitter, he might have allowed to grow and bloom.

Lily had been patient with him but she had eventually left. Just as his mother eventually left him, when his father's abuse became too much. Severus had had no one.

He blamed Potter, Black and their odious gang entirely.

He'd been so looking forward to coming to Hogwarts. He knew he probably wouldn't have fitted in all that well with his old clothes and second-hand equipment, but he was sure that with Lily's friendship, at least he would be happy.

But Black and Potter had picked on him from the very first day. He snorted now at the memories. Gryffindors. What a joke that was. They would only ever attack him unless it was four on one. What a bunch of pathetic, cowardly, arrogant…

"How are you, Severus?"

It was Wormtail and his stupid squeaky voice.

Severus wasn't sure if Wormtail might suspect he was in fact working for the Order or not. He was sure (though of course nothing is certain with them) that Black and Lupin wouldn't have been quite stupid enough to have told Wormtail that he, Severus, was also a spy. They wouldn't have trusted him with that information. Though it sounded like the idiotic pair had forgotten about him entirely anyway.

That was typical of Gryffindors. No one else mattered to them. If you weren't constantly engaged in some heroic and completely stupid fight, you may as well not exist to them. Their arrogance was unbelievable.

"Probably a great deal better than you, Wormtail." Severus said, looking down his nose at the (he was pleased to see) scrawny and unkempt looking man. "Where are you living these days?"

"Oh, I've been doing better in recent weeks. I was hiding in the gutters until… well, I've got an empty muggle house now." He said, going slightly pink as he changed tack.

What a colossal fool. He'd clearly been just about to share with Severus the mission he'd been given. He was going to be the worst spy imaginable. Severus wouldn't be at all sorry if he got caught. He certainly wouldn't do anything to stop the death eaters exacting justice.

He wondered if once or twice it might be a neat idea to tell the death eaters about the arrangement Black and Lupin had with Wormtail.

He knew the death eaters were becoming suspicious of him for his lack of violence and active involvement in the cause. Telling them of what he knew would surely be the perfect way to convince them he was on their side. They didn't need to know he loathed Black, Lupin and Wormtails' guts.

But he didn't as he knew it would get back to Albus somehow.

Dumbledore had many great qualities, but his one irredeemable character flaw was that he couldn't see what a foul waste of space that great moron Black was.

Severus would never forgive the headmaster for the way he had constantly sided with the Gryffindor boys in their Hogwarts days. Just because Albus had been a Gryffindor himself, he seemed to favour the students of that house and couldn't see that beneath their brash exterior they were really just hot air.

He'd been accused by the stupid Gryffindor gang of having no sense of humour. Even Lily had laughed at Black and Potters jokes at times. That had enraged him like nothing else. They'd even managed to pull the wool over the eyes of the kindest, most intelligent girl he'd ever known. They really would stop at nothing to destroy him. He wanted them dead.

He ground his teeth as he made his way back to the castle after the meeting. Seeing Wormtail had angered him, and he needed to vent his spleen.

"No running in the corridors!" He barked at a pair of first year girls.

The girls froze and turned, terrified, to face him.

Their robes and scarves told him instantly they were Gryffindors.

Feeling vicious, he approached them. One took a nervous step back. Chuh. Brave, were they?

"What are your names?" He barked at them.

The girl on the left looked close to tears. "I'm Georgia Bell." She stammered.

"S-Suneina Patil." Said the other.

Severus considered the children. He'd never had much patience for the young ones in the castle. They were far too prone to tears and then inevitably he'd be called into Dumbledore's office for a chat about his 'manner'.

There were no problems with his manners. It was stupid little girls and boys like these who were the problem.

"If I catch you again it will be detention." He said malevolently. "And believe me, you don't want that…"

The girls gave him a terrified look.

"Go on!" He snapped, waving an impatient hand and they scarpered.

Feeling marginally better, he made his way to the dungeons where he lived.

He liked it down here. He was the only teacher with living quarters in this part of the castle, as most of his colleagues preferred to have at least some daylight.

Severus didn't mind though. He would take peace and quiet over sunlight any day.

Entering his private quarters, he threw off his shoes and sank into his armchair. He waved his wand to summon a glass of wine and book.

He didn't drink much, he'd never be like his useless drunk father, but after the day he'd had, something small to take the edge off was just what was required.

He felt himself relax as he read. It was a book by an Arabic wizard who had discovered a way to perform curses without using a wand. It could be handy should he find himself disarmed at all. It would certainly have been handy in his days at Hogwarts…

Unbidden, his 'worst memory' came to mind again. Black and Potter had disarmed him then. It had been under the beech tree after their DADA OWL exam. He'd been reading the exam paper. He'd been doing nothing to warrant it.

He recalled his pain and humiliation as he'd been hit with the impediment jinx and then turned upside down by Potter, using the very same spell he, Severus, had invented - levicorpus.

He felt the familiar hatred in his chest as his old arch enemy came to mind. He was glad Potter was dead, although unfortunately he still had to look at his spoiled son three times a week in DADA.

It was hell to have to teach Harry Potter. The irksome thing was he wasn't totally talentless, which made it difficult for Severus to take points from him or ensure he wasn't complimented or praised.

Of course he had that buffoon Weasley by his side and that irritant Granger to constantly tell him not to listen to Severus, and that he was doing a good job. Ugh. As if that stupid spawn of James Potter needed any encouragement. He was far too arrogant and cocky as it was already. Exactly as his father had been.

And the stupid swine had somehow managed to inherit his own potions book!

He'd known it the moment Slughorn told him of Harry's success in his classes. The clever tricks on his potions were nothing Potter himself had the brains to think up. Severus had lent his old potions textbook to Warrington, who hadn't come prepared to the lesson once either. He'd asked him to put it back in the potions cupboard when he'd finished with it, but he'd never dreamed it would fall into the hands of Harry Potter.

He enjoyed himself for a while thinking of ways to expose Potter in the most humiliating way possible. Wouldn't it be good when boy wonder failed to fulfill his role as the perfect little potioneer Horace clearly had him down as? What a pleasant thought that was.

The rest of the week went as it usually did for Severus. He took around a hundred more house points from Gryffindor, put Weasley in detention for swearing when he hit him with a curse the stupid boy failed to block and was in rather a good mood by the time Friday rolled round.

"Drink, Severus?" Professor Sprout said merrily to him as the pair met in the corridor.

Severus knew some of the staff went into Hogsmeade on Friday evenings for drinks. He'd never once joined them and wasn't about to start doing so now.

"No, thank you, Pomona." He said crisply, wondering why the silly woman continued to ask him when his answer was always the same. "I have business to attend to."

That was certainly true. There was an Order meeting tonight at six o' clock.

Unfortunately it meant visiting the odious Black's house, into which he had moved his pathetic boyfriend Lupin and now, apparently, Lupin's girlfriend Tonks. What a nauseating scene of happy families that surely was.

"Drink, Severus?" Lupin asked him politely as he entered the headquarters.

Severus wondered when Lupin was going to give up the game that he actually cared about Severus.

He'd done this throughout the whole year the men had taught at Hogwarts together. Severus hadn't bought it for one minute. Lupin had been the worst of all four of the Gryffindor pillocks to his mind. At least Black, Potter and Wormtail didn't try and hide the fact that they were idiots. Lupin was a sneaky, crafty fellow. Severus didn't trust him as far as he could throw him.

"No thank you." He said, moving to take a seat at the table and helping himself to a cup of tea from the pot there.

"Alright, Snapey?"

It was Mundungus Fletcher. Why an idiot like this had been granted permission to work for the Order was anyone's best guess.

"How many drinks have you had now, Dung?" Sturgis Podmore of the thatched haircuts said, grinning as the other man reached forwards for the wine bottle again.

"Oh I stopped counting after about five."

The rest of the Order members slowly arrived. Severus detested the way they lingered and chatted before getting down to any real business. Who cared what OWLs Shacklebolt's niece was taking or about the dirigible plums Diggle was growing in his garden?

Eventually, thank Merlin and all his kin, Albus called the gathered Order members to order.

"How is everyone doing?"

Oh for Merlin's sake! Severus thought impatiently as another round of small-talk ensued.

When it had eventually died down (fortunately Dumbledore cut Mundungus off before he could go into any more detail about his dodgy bowels), they did, finally discuss business.

Severus was glad for the opportunity to share what he knew of the death eater activity. He knew he wasn't in the thick of things as much as the other Order members. Of course being a spy made that quite impossible. So he liked having the chance to demonstrate his value when it arose.

"They are plotting how to break the remaining death eaters out of Azkaban." He relayed to the table. "And they are planning another giant attack. They want to target Buckingham Palace. It might be worth warning the muggle prime minister."

Severus' eyes fell on Black as he delivered his news. The man was looking down at the table as if Severus' words were not in the least bit interesting to him.

"Kingsley, will you please liaise with Mr Major and his government?"

"Certainly, Albus." Kingsley promised.

"Thank you. And Sirius?"

Black looked suddenly up as if caught doodling in class. Idiot.

"Will you please go to Azkaban and support the guards there until Scrimgeour can be persuaded to send official reinforcements?"

Severus couldn't help but snort at this. Of course Albus would send Black to help at Azkaban. He knew the place inside out.

It had given Severus such great pleasure to think of Black behind bars. What a shame he had escaped.

"Can I go too, Albus?" Lupin piped up from beside Black. He was looking rather warily at his friend. Severus didn't bother to consider why that might be.

"It's fine, Moony." Black said gruffly. Moony. That was the nickname they'd given Lupin because he turned into a werewolf at the full moon. How dumb and unoriginal these idiots were.

"If you can spare the time." Albus told Lupin. "Do you think you will be able to?"

"I haven't learned anything new from the pack of werewolves in Surrey." Lupin reported. "They were approached by Greyback, but they weren't interested in what he had to say. I think having me there helped convince them they were doing the right thing too."

"Well done." Dumbledore said. He turned back to Severus. "Is there anything else you wish to report before we discuss other business, Severus?"

"Yes." Severus said crossly, not wanting to lose another chance to speak his mind. "There was absolutely no point in telling Wormtail to spy on what's going on. The death eaters don't tell him anything anyway, and it's risky to have two spies. I want the arrangement stopped."

"Oh play nice, Snape." Black said lazily from across the table. "I know it might be a foreign concept to you, but it is possible to work with someone else you know."

"I'm not planning on working with him." Severus snapped. "He is far too likely to compromise my position."

"Oh poor Wormtail." Black said in mock sympathy. "He's not that thick. He managed a P in one of his NEWTs."

"Quite honestly I don't know who's the bigger fool of the two of you, Black."

"Thank you, Severus." Albus said from the head of the table.

Severus turned indignantly to Dumbledore. "It's thanks to Black here that I'm in this mess!"

"Actually it was my idea." Lupin confessed, drawing Severus' attention to him now. "And I'm terribly sorry not to have consulted you first, Severus. I can see now that was a mistake."

A 'mistake'… just like his hero Black had made a 'mistake' in sending him, Severus, down to meet a werewolf at the full moon once.

Lupin was a fool. Severus had no patience for weak men like that.

"Usually when we make mistakes, Lupin, we rectify them." He said icily.

This was another thing he loathed about Gryffindors and Dumbledore too, come to that. There were never any consequences for their misbehaviour and rule breaking. It was due to a serious lack of discipline that they were allowed to do the things they'd done and treat Severus the way they had.

"What do you suggest I do about it, Severus?" Lupin asked him.

"Tell him you don't need his services anymore then find out where the idiot's hiding and arrest him. I think I can help you with that…"

"It's a hard choice, Snape, but if I had to choose between you and Wormtail, I think I'd still choose Wormtail."

Severus turned, in outrage, to Dumbledore. Surely he wasn't going to let Black get away with speaking to him like that? Wormtail was a death eater!

To his further outrage he was sure he saw the headmaster quickly straighten his face. Had he found Black's comment amusing or something?!

"I'm leaving." He said, getting to his feet.

"Mind the troll's leg umbrella stand in the hallway. People have a habit of tripping over it." Black said.

He turned to Dumbledore. "I've said all I came here to say and I've heard quite enough. If you need me you know where I am."

And with that he left the house.

He hated that the Order meetings were held at Black's family home. He felt it gave him some sort of power that shouldn't be afforded to him.

More than that though, he hated the way Dumbledore constantly sided with Black and Lupin. Why could no one but him see what they were really like?

He'd despised the popularity Black and Potter had had at Hogwarts. It had made him realise how weak people were. How easily swayed they could be by a funny joke or a smart comeback. How driven people were by popularity themselves, wanting to be friends with the odious duo simply to gain some kind of reflected glory. How pathetic people were.

He counted himself fortunate he had never fallen for their shallow comedy routine. There was no substance to any of them. They thought they were brave, but they never had the courage to do what really needed to be done. They didn't have the grit to actually meet the dark arts themselves.

That was where Severus prided himself, and it was for this reason that he knew he was the best defence teacher Albus would get.

While his predecessors had focused on fighting the dark arts, he knew they must truly be understood to be conquered. And he, Severus, understood them. He'd lost everything when he'd lost Lily. He'd been to hell and back. Absolutely nothing frightened him anymore.

No. Severus knew there were very few people courageous enough to truly understand the Dark Lord. It was a skill reserved only for the most ambitious and cunning of minds, and certainly not for those hypocritical Gryffindors that were Black, Lupin and Albus Dumbledore.

...

A/N: Oh if only Sirius and Snape knew the things they have in common... We won't enlighten them (yet!)