TW: some talk of alcohol, drug abuse, and self harm.
It was a blurry whirlwind of tests as soon as Natsu made it to the hospital and Lucy was admitted. He was a mess the whole time pacing in the waiting room when he couldn't follow. Hands in his hair, as he waited for some kind of update. Time always felt like a standstill in the hospital, each time he checked his phone it seemed like it was always the same. After who knows how long, a few hours probably, he scrambles up from his chair when a familiar doctor he saw earlier made his way over to him.
"For a Lucy Heartfilia?"
"Y-Yes, please, is she- is she ok?" Natsu rushed out, heart pounding, head throbbing.
There's a rush of words like pneumonia, severe lung infection, and more complicated terms that didn't sound great already went over his head, but importantly the doctor said she wasn't critical anymore, they were able to stabilize her for now and Natsu could go up and see her with a sympathetic smile.
That allowed Natsu a sigh of relief at that, tightness in his chest loosening a bit as he thanked him and started to follow the directions up towards Lucy's room. It was quiet past hallways and rooms, save for beeps of machinery and smelled of strong cleaning products. He took a steadying deep breath when he reached the right room number.
His chest ached again as soon as he saw her, seeming small and pale in that large stark white bed, only a soft lamp on in the dark room. Closing the door and slowly walking over, Natsu swallowed thickly as he leaned over for a barely there press of his lips to her forehead, almost scared to hurt her more. He's grateful she doesn't feel burning hot like before or expression pinched in too much pain. Bit of a silver lining at least, and he hoped it meant she was getting better.
He pulled the chair in the corner close beside her bed, to sit closer, tentative hand gently resting over hers where it laid. "Hi, I'm here, Luce," he rasped, clearing his throat softly trying to break up the thick lump of emotion there.
Natsu's thumb brushed over the back of her hand, quiet as he took everything in. The steady rise and fall of her chest, tick of the clock on the wall, beeping from the machine in the corner, pumping of oxygen seeming to help her breathe. Now that he's finally beside Lucy like this, all the build up of his stressed nerves and adrenaline running high all night finally seeming to wear him down, shoulders slumping with a deep sigh.
The doctor's words come back to him, finally registering that he'd said it ended up being a severe case of pneumonia. Her immune system could've already been weak and affected her more apparently. How they had to go in and treat her lungs, how weak it all made her, how it may be a while until she came to and woke up. Especially with how high of a fever she'd had for a while.
Careful of the IV in her arm, he cradled her hand in between his palms, leaning over with elbows on the bed and hands to his forehead. "I'm sorry, Luce. I should'a noticed how bad you were feelin' and got you help sooner," he sighed. "Should'a watched out for you more and insisted we have more relaxing days after working yourself into the night to get through this past semester, not have kept you up in the cold mountains for so long or something." He paused with a small smile, thinking what she'd say. "I know you'd tell me it's not my fault and not to blame myself or anything, but you'll always be the most important thing to me. Everything . So, please… please wake up and be ok…" he said, voice shaking with a whisper at the end, tears pricking his eyes.
The thought of something worse happening and losing her was… already unbearable to think about. Natsu doesn't know what his life even looks like without her anymore, all the good and love she's brought into it, the life they've built together already. All so much more than he ever expected.
He really hopes they could have that forever…
Which… is what he realized a while ago that he wants with Lucy. Forever.
"Everyone I've lost… I can't- I can't lose you too, Lucy," Natsu swallowed thickly. He looked back up, moving closer to reach up and push back her hair softly, wishing he was looking into those honeyed chocolate eyes. "I l-love you too much to lose you," he rasped. "I always will… and I could-" He paused to swallow thickly, feeling his heart wanting to keep pushing words out. "I think we've been on the same page of building more of a future together for a while, but you really are it for me, Luce. I'd be content to spend the rest of my life by your side in any way you want, but if the universe could just give me a chance to ask you to spend forever with me, give me a chance to give you the world and everything else you deserve I will." A warm swell of conviction settled in his chest. "I'm an idiot for not telling you right when I started feeling all this, but if... I wanna do things right and make it special for you. The thought of you saying y-yes, loving a guy like me is just... just please give me a chance and come back to me soon." Natsu felt some tears start to wet his shirt, not even realizing when they'd started falling, but he just gave in and let himself just feel everything. Head back on the side of her bed and some rough sobs passing through him.
As much as processing emotions felt like too much sometimes, he was trying to put his therapy advice to work. He'd spent too long bottling up too much, for so much of his life. Even though the bit of counseling Igneel had put him when he was a kid, after everything with his parents, did help back then, he'd stopped once high school rolled around, the moody teenager he was not wanting to bother with it anymore. Then the older he got, the easier it became to just block things out during all those years of serving and having to just shut out everything just to focus out there and when he got back home. But during these years with Lucy, it became obvious how much of a bad habit it had all become. Especially with finally coming home and having to deal with everything that came with it, he was trying to be better for her and it felt good to finally have a proper outlet. What they have was too important for him to fuck it up over not wanting to deal with his baggage, for her and himself.
Natsu didn't sleep at all after that, couldn't sleep. Instead restless and pacing, sitting and just watching the rise and fall of her chest holding her hand. He thought he'd felt her hand twitch here and there during the night, making him jump, but they were false alarms.
"Don't worry. I'm right here with you, just get more rest and focus on getting better," he whispered, pressing a lingering kiss to her hand cradled in between his palms.
There's a click of the door opening a while later, startling him dozing off in the chair a little. Natsu expected the same nurse that stopped by a few times last night with a sympathetic smile, but Gray and Igneel walked in instead.
Natsu is surprised for a moment and they beat him at the next question on his tongue.
They must notice his confused expression thinking how they knew he was here when his dad says: "We figured you'd forgotten your scrambled texts to us last night and we came first chance we could this morning to check in," Igneel said warmly.
That did jog Natsu's memory of trying to distract himself in the waiting room before and letting them know what was going on. He didn't even remember how late it must've been when he was texting them, because sure enough, time apparently passed and it's brighter morning light through the window when Natsu looked behind his shoulder. He dug out his phone from his pocket and there were a few missed texts and calls from them both.
"Ah, that's right. Sorry, had my phone quiet. It's been a long night," Natsu said with a rough chuckle, running a hand through his hair.
"No worries, we figured your head was all over the place," Gray reassured warmly. "Safe to assume you stood here last night and got no sleep?"
Natsu hummed. "Pretty much. How could I leave?" he said softly, looking over at Lucy again with a squeeze of her hand.
"How's she doing?" Igneel asked softly, gripping Natsu's shoulder and taking the chair beside him.
Natsu sighed, gripping his hand back, and filled them in on the latest from the doctors and by the end they have sympathetic looks.
"She's still stable they say, but still a waiting game," Natsu said softly, thumb brushing the back of her hand.
"Don't worry. Lucy's a tough one, she'll be ok," Igneel reassured. "And she's got all our support and love to pull through too."
"Thanks, Dad," Natsu gave him a grateful smile and a nod, leaning over to give him a proper hug.
Igneel hummed and gave him a tight hug back. "Also, since we figured you didn't bring much, we stopped by the house and checked on Happy, brought you some fresh clothes and things to freshen up. Some for Lucy too when she's good to go," Igneel said, gesturing to Gray holding onto a bag Natsu didn't notice at first.
Natsu's heart warmed, breathing a soft chuckle. "Thank you, you guys always think of everything."
"Some of us do use our brains after all."
Natsu gave a half-hearted stick of his tongue at Gray's tease. He can tell they're just trying to keep his spirits up and he appreciates it.
"Now now, Natsu, play nice. Why don't you take a break and go with Gray and get somethin' to eat down in the cafeteria. I'll stay and keep Lucy company," Igneel offered.
His stomach growled at the words, but his chest ached at the thought of leaving Lucy right now. "I dunno, what if she…"
"Lucy still needs some rest. C'mon, you can't be much help to her if you're running yourself ragged," Gray insisted warmly, concern still reflecting in his expression.
Natsu's heart swelled. What would he do without his family.
"Ok, ok. We'll be quick, but-"
"Don't worry, I'll be sure to call you right away if something happens," Igneel grinned, reading Natsu's mind and it's enough to settle his nerves a bit.
Natsu gave him a small smile back, nodding with one more squeeze of Lucy's hand and Igneel's shoulder before getting up to follow Gray.
They were quiet on the walk down to the cafeteria, settling on something decent looking with a couple drinks and found an empty table out on the outside courtyard. Natsu took a deep breath, the warmth of the sun, trees around them and fresh air helping to ease the lack of sleep, stressed, sharp lingering headache a little.
"I told Juvs not to tell everyone just yet when I left, wasn't sure if you did yet or wanted us to or not," Gray said after a moment.
"Oh, yeah. Think I meant to last night, but ended up only having energy for you guys," Natsu sighed, fingers fidgeting with his water bottle. "I'll let them know later. Know Luce would appreciate all their support too, but they're gonna wanna swarm over here as soon as I do. Y'know how they can be," he chuckles softly.
"True, we all flooded the waiting room for Levy, I can imagine."
"Especially since she's not totally out of the woods yet," Natsu swallowed thickly, chest aching again. "I don't want to overwhelm her too much. Sure her body's fighting hard to get better."
"She will be," Gray insisted, voice warm and firm. What Natsu needed to not let those thoughts take over.
They're quiet for a bit again as Natsu finally gets some food in him, helping to ease his head a bit too.
"So, how've you been holding up?"
Natsu looked over, bit of concern still lingering in Gray's eyes.
"Yeah, just worried y'know," he sighed, running a hand through his hair.
Gray just gave him that 'Really? Don't bother lying to me' look that made Natsu breathe though a soft chuckle.
"Ok, ok. A bit more than worried," Natsu admits with a sigh. "We thought it was just a bad flu after taking our trip at first, then things got worse so quickly and it hurt to see her in pain like that. Everything the doctors have been saying sound pretty serious which doesn't help." He paused, frustration welling up in him. "Things could be going great and the universe is like, here's something to remind you all your happiness could be taken away just like that," he scoffed. "And I just- I feel so helpless. I should be doing something more to help, protecting her, but I can't and I... I can't lose the best thing in my life," he ended softly, emotion thick in his throat again.
Gray hummed with a nod. "You're not gonna lose her. Know things don't look great right now, but at least she's not critical anymore and we know Lucy's strong and will pull through this. You are helping her, she has you by her side and has all our support. I'm sure she feels that," he reassured warmly. "Know it sucks to feel so out of control and like it's one thing after another, but we're with you too."
Natsu gave him a warm, grateful smile and a nod, nerves in his chest calming.
"She definitely is. Stronger than me, absolutely," Natsu chuckled softly. "She's kept me going all this time, gotten me through to much so it's the least I could do to be here for her to lean on now..." he sighed. "And I know she was worrying about me just as much all the times we were out there getting all beat up too. Maybe more of the universe's payback," Natsu huffed a laugh.
Gray snorted. "You and your reckless, damaged thick skull out there has definitely put her nerves through worse. Miracle you made it back in one piece."
"That's for sure," Natsu chuckled, running a hand through his hair. He's quiet for a moment, looking over through the trees across from them, reflective. "That's what ran through my head too. Fighting like hell to make it back here with her safe every time, we finally have that now, then only to have something like this want to cut our future together short... I don't even want to picture life without her..." He shook his head and the negative thoughts away.
Natsu's earlier thoughts about their future come back to him. He almost wants to keep it to himself, almost afraid to jinx anything, but his best friend always knows better. "And y'know... to be honest, I've been feeling for a while now, but Luce really is it for me and I… I really want forever with her," he admitted softly, strong wave of love swelling in his chest.
Gray shared a rare wide, confident grin. "Well, I could'a called that one as soon as you met that first night and you only had eyes for her ever since."
"Yeah, our usual everyone could see it but us for so long," Natsu laughed warmly, fondly remembering that night and his heart obviously falling for her right then and there.
"Of course," Gray shrugged. "I assume you mean the marriage kinda forever with her right?"
It was Natsu's turn to smile wide, chest welling with joy and excitement just at the thought, a sheepish hand at the back of his neck.
"Y'know, it was never even a thought in my mind before her. Especially with us constantly away and moving some place, I never even cared about that kinda thing, let alone even met anyone to make me think that was gonna happen for me either," he breathed deep. "Now, to think I could reach this point in my life where I even crave taking that kinda step with someone as amazing as her has been… Luce just changed my life for the best. We've talked about it a bit in general, if that kinda future was something we both wanted, and think we definitely do are after Levy's wedding," he smiled softly, remembering the flutter in his heart every time he looked at her that night, her happy smile and all, walking beside her up to the front, where all the declarations of love resonating with him, unable to take his eyes off her. "I couldn't help picturing something like that for us that whole night and she had this look in her eyes too and it all just felt right. She already has my heart always, so, yeah I've been thinking about that kinda forever with her," he smiled brighter. "I don't know when, but know I wanna do something special when I do ask. To think she could say yes and want forever with me too is a dream."
"Wow, look at you. Therapy, talking through your feelings, wanting to get married. You're all grown up," Gray smiled.
Natsu laughed a bit brighter at that. "Yeah, who would'a thought."
"But really, of course she's gonna say yes, she's just as crazy for you. I'm happy for you guys. Proud of you for taking care of yourself too." There's more rare emotion on Gray's face that makes Natsu's chest warm.
"Thanks," Natsu smiles softly. "You and Luce helped give me the push I needed."
"Well, y'know. Sure." Gray put a sheepish hand through his hair.
A wider smile grew for Natsu. He knows it's not gonna be an easy road, he feels that already, but it's worth it for himself and for what he and Lucy are building together.
They catch up a bit more about how Gray's been doing for a while before heading back to the room to check on Lucy.
"See, we kept each other good company," Igneel grinned with a soft pat to Lucy's leg when they walked back in.
"I'm glad, thanks," Natsu chuckled, handing his dad the extra snacks they brought him. "Any updates?"
Igneel said the nurse just came in to check Lucy's vitals but no major updates yet. Natsu nodded with a sigh before slumping back into his chair.
"How about you? Feeling better," Igneel asked, reaching over to grip Natsu's shoulder.
"Still worried, but yeah a bit better," Natsu breathed, thumb brushing over Lucy's hand softly. "Thank you guys for keeping me sane through this. The thought of something happening just has my head all..."
"I know, but she'll pull through."
Natsu nodded with a grateful smile. They talk softly for a while longer and Natsu appreciates the company and distraction from his thoughts. Igneel and Gray take their leave once evening started to roll around, his leg starting to bother him. They give Natsu a couple more tight hugs and a supportive squeeze of Lucy's hand before heading out.
Natsu sighed deeply and braced his hands on the sink in the bathroom when he freshened up and changed a bit later. Gray was right, he was looking pretty rough. He had to keep it together and stay strong for Lucy, and that gave him a bit to hold onto for the night.
Though, it gets a bit harder when another couple days passed by with little progress. As expected, everyone was worried as soon as Natsu had let them know, but gave some time before coming in to help give their support. Levy and Erza stayed late talking with him last night until he was dozing off and they gave him and Lucy warm hugs before leaving him with his messy thoughts for another restless night.
"Hope you can feel all our love and support, Luce," Natsu sighed, sitting softly on the side of her bed facing her, palm on her thigh. The soft lamp in the corner caste a soft glow on her hair. "Wish it felt like I'm doing more. Y'know me, I'm an action guy and can't sit still," he chuckled softly, thumb brushing the blanket over her. "But then it's your voice in my head, tellin' me to just take a moment and breathe. That it'll all work out." And he does, taking a deep breath in and out, channeling his energy and love into his touch. "You're so strong. Fighting so hard to heal. Just come back to me soon, love. I'm right here with you..."
Natsu eventually felt consciousness slowly tug at him, not even remembering when he'd fallen asleep, but foggy lingering haze of sleep made him blissfully forget where he was until the sharp ache between his temples came back, as soon as he breathed in deep, registering the smell of the sterile room, beeps of machinery, pulling him back into the moment. The deep ache in his back, neck, and shoulders from his head resting on his folded arms on the hard bed also made it apparent that this wasn't their comfy room, but still the same cold hospital room, making his chest ache. How much he wishes he was back there with Lucy right now.
He sighed a deep and steadying breath. They'll make it through this. Groaning softly, the fingers threading softly through his hair started to ease his-
Wait.
Was that…
It couldn't be the girls, they'd left last night…
Natsu's heart quickly leapt into his throat, immediately awake. He whipped his head up… and was met with those beautiful honeyed brown eyes, tired and half lidded but looking right at him with affection, small soft smile. He was almost scared he was stuck in a dream.
"L-Luce?…" he managed to rasp out past the thick emotion already forming in his throat.
"Hi," Lucy whispers, words muffled through the mask, palm shifting to his cheek.
A few tears ended up escaping before he realizes it, auto pilot moving his body to scramble up from the chair, leaning over to gently hold her in his arms for a long moment. He pulled back, palms softly cradling her face. It's definitely not a dream, she's really awake and here with him.
"Oh, you're ok, you're ok," Natsu murmured against her skin, pressing soft kisses to her temple, cheeks and forehead, relief flowing through him. He felt her hug him back gently, palm smoothing along his shoulders and arms.
"I'm getting there," she rasped with a deep sigh. "But I'm here." She squeezed his wrists, affirming that.
Natsu nodded with an airy chuckle, managing to pull himself together a bit to quickly press the call button and have the nurses come check on her to make sure things were ok. He's grateful when they look relieved to see her awake too and say her vitals were still stable.
"Well, that sure felt like I got hit by a truck," Lucy said with a soft chuckle, now free from the mask, freshened up, and sitting up a bit. "Guess it was worse than we thought. Sorry for worrying you," she said softly.
"Hey, no apologizing," Natsu smiled, moving to sit on the side of the bed beside her, reaching up to rest an arm up behind her head, smoothing her hair back and palm caressing her cheek with the other. "Of course I'll worry about you, but I was right here with you the whole time."
Lucy's expression softened, leaning into his touch.
"I did feel that. I would hear your voice in my head, could almost feel your hand gripping mine. You kept me going, just like you always do," she said softly.
Her words warmed his heart, palm shifting towards the back of her neck, thumb brushing along her jaw as his forehead fell onto hers. "I was so scared I was gonna lose you," he whispered, voice shaking. "Was just doing whatever I could, and I'm just happy you're here with me now."
Lucy's palms came up to smooth along his chest, surely feeling his pounding heart. The one that only beat for her.
"You'll never lose me. I love you too much to let that happen. Sickness and all," she smiled soft and loving.
Natsu huffed through an airy laugh. "I love you more." He finally closed the last distance between them and kissed her slow and tender just as he's been aching to all this time.
Lucy breathed a soft sound against him, fingers tightening in his shirt and kissing him deeper. His heart was so so full.
A couple days later, several more tests and treatments, Lucy's finally given the green light to go home. Her relieved, happy smile is worth the wait, warming Natsu's heart.
Natsu pulled the truck around and gingerly helps her into her seat from the wheelchair, both of them thanking the nurses.
"Settled in ok, Luce? Belt isn't too tight is it? We'll take the long way and I'll go slow or-"
Lucy pulled him down by his shirt to give him a soft kiss, interrupting his rambling. "Stop worrying. I'm not a hundred percent yet, but I'm getting there and I'm just happy to finally go back home with you." The warm reassurance in her voice and love in her eyes settled his lingering nerves a bit.
"I can't help it," Natsu sighed, smiling softly, reaching up to curl her hair behind her ear. "The last time we were in the truck like this I was at the edge of my seat racing to get you here in time..."
Her expression softened, cupping his cheek. "I know. But let's just go home now."
Natsu nodded with a wider smile. That sounds perfect. He finished getting her comfortable, setting the blanket over her before going over to his side and starting up the truck. He did end up taking the longer route so he could be cautious, taking his time, even though she told him he was driving as slow as a turtle. He didn't deny it and just enjoyed her soft laughter, often looking over at her and let the sight of her warm content smile fill his heart with love.
He made a stop at Mira's restaurant at her and Lisanna's insistence where they loaded up his truck with enough soups, food, and more to last all week as soon as he parked. He and Lucy were so grateful and the sisters wouldn't even hear of taking Natsu's money, so warm grateful hugs and well wishes were given all around.
Natsu's just as cautious with her when they make it home, holding most of her weight against him with an arm around her waist since she still felt a bit weak walking on her own. Happy was quick to mrowl loudly, trotting over to circle their legs as soon as they walked in.
"Aww, I missed you too Happy," Lucy chuckled softly, reaching down to scratch his head.
"Sorry to leave for a while, buddy. Did you tell uncle Gray and everyone for coming to check up on you?"
Happy just gave a disinterested meow in between his purring, making them laugh.
"Did you want to eat something first or just head upstairs?" Natsu asked softly, hand steady at the small of her back.
Lucy thought for a moment, but the tiredness in her eyes seemed to win for now. "Think I just want to rest for a while first."
Natsu nodded with a soft smile and directed her towards the stairs. "Hold tight."
Before Lucy could ask why, he gathered her in his arms and was carrying her up the stairs. She giggled softly, arms winding around his neck. "I'm gonna have to walk on my own eventually."
"Yeah, but doesn't have'ta be today," he smirked, kissing her temple. He helped her get settled into bed, where she sighed deeply and stretched out.
"Ah I missed this bed so much."
Natsu smiled warmly, setting some things down for her on the side table. "Definitely comfier. I'll go get things cleaned up and bring you some food when you're up to it, ok?" He squeezed her hand and moved to turn when Lucy held onto it tighter. He followed her pull to sit on the side of the bed beside her.
"Thank you. Looking out for me, staying with me over there, taking care of me," Lucy whispered, her eyes already looking heavy. "For loving me, for everything."
Strong warmth swelled in Natsu's heart, reaching over to thread a hand through her hair and rest on her cheek. "I'll always be here for you, do anything, and will always love you. No need to thank me for that."
Lucy smiled softly, leaning into his touch with another whisper that she loved him before falling asleep. Natsu stayed with her for a couple moments, watching her finally sleeping peacefully and not in too much pain, before leaning over to press a lingering kiss to her forehead and heading back downstairs.
He sighed once he had a quick bite and got everything put away, sitting at the island and taking a long look around. Relief really washing through him. Lucy was ok and was safe back home with him. He really owed Igneel, Gray, and the others for all their help. Taking care of Happy, keeping up the house here, cleaning up their room for Lucy. He was a mess the whole time and would've fallen apart without them.
Natsu smiled to himself, pulling his phone from his pocket and sending over a text to their group telling them Lucy was home safe and his grateful thoughts. With another to Gray and Igneel themselves. He'd felt so undeserving for so much of his life, and was still working on that, but he was finally feeling himself reaching a turning point of truly accepting all the love and good in his life.
All the warm and happy replies he received affirm that.
The week passed and with each day, Lucy kept recovering well and getting some final check ups and treatments from her doctor, also getting her color back in her face, which made Natsu happy. Her school and job had also been so understanding too, giving her time to recover.
Though despite her getting more of her strength back and almost back to her usual independent self, Natsu still couldn't help insisting on doing most things for her, often resulting in her playfully rolling her eyes and waving him off.
Today she listened to her body and let herself relax up in the room today watching an older movie, Lucy propped up with some pillows against the headboard, her head against Natsu's shoulder, fingers tracing along his hand. He breathed in deep, turning to press a kiss to her head. She shifted closer and he smiled softly, it's just what he wanted for her.
The movie progressed to a point where the brothers were arguing and it striked something in him, making him still.
Oh. That's right.
The memory of Zeref showing up at his door the other week came crashing back into him. Also how Natsu still hadn't reached out to him, or had mentioned it to Lucy yet.
Granted they had a lot going on lately, and had slipped his mind with everything. He didn't really want to bother her with this while she was recovering, but he also wanted to keep improving on being more open… She would just tell him she was getting better now and he shouldn't worry so much. She would mostly just want to offer her support as always.
His heart warmed at the thought, so he just followed that.
"Oh, um, hey, Luce?" he murmured, feeling her hum in acknowledgement before sitting up a bit to face him, hand still laced in his.
"Are you okay?" she asked softly, some concern in her eyes.
"Yeah, I just- um, I've been meaning to tell you that right before we were dealing with everything lately, I got a visit from-" Natsu swallowed thickly. "My b-brother, um, Zeref came by." His chest suddenly felt tight already.
Her eyes widened a bit. "Really? Wow, that's unexpected. How did- what did he say?" She asked softly, squeezing his hand as she shifted to face him better. "More importantly, how are you feeling? Know things are complicated and you guys haven't had much of a relationship in a long time."
Natsu gave her a reassuring smile. "Know I've only said a bit about him over the years, but he just- he hasn't been a part of my life for so long I've just gotten used to that, used to just burying everything when it came to him, like I had the bad habit of doing… Not that it did me any good now that he's just popped back up like this," he chuckled, a dry tired sound. "And y'know… even though he was technically adopted, that never mattered to me. He always just felt like my br- my brother," Natsu swallowed thickly. "Which just made it hurt all the more when he started shutting himself off to us, to everything, all the cold anger he had towards us, relying on all the drugs, the drinks. All the help Igneel tried to give him didn't matter either, it was all more important for him to just get his next fix, be numb, and let it turn him into someone I didn't even recognize by the last time he walked out the door. N-Nothing like the boy I'd grown up with, and he couldn't even stay for me either." There was another thick lump of emotion in his throat by the end, not even realizing where all the words came from, but his chest felt a bit lighter letting some of it out. "Sorry, that all kinda came out at once," he breathed a huff of a laugh, squeezing Lucy's hand for comfort.
"Hey, you, don't do that," Lucy reassured warmly, reaching back to thread a hand through the hair at the back of his head, soothing his nerves. "Never have to feel bad for opening up. Especially with complicated situations like this. I'm here for you to lean on. So unfair you had to feel that way for so long growing up," she said, kind sympathy in those honeyed eyes.
"Thank you. I know you always are," Natsu smiled easy, shifting to rest his head on her shoulder, soaking in all her soothing warmth, fingers still laced with hers. "He mostly wanted to apologize, said he's been sober for a few years now and he wants- said he wants to try and reconnect and build something between us again." He paused, gathering his thoughts. "I didn't really know what to feel the whole time, still kind of don't… I'm frustrated that it's out of the blue, a bit mad that he thinks we can just patch things up just like that? And yet… part of me is a bit - happy to see him," he sighed heavily. "I never even thought I'd see him again… then he's right there in front of me and all the hurt, anger, and a whole mess of things I'd buried for so long came up pretty quickly and pushed away all the things I thought I'd say if I ever did see him again. It all felt like too much pretty quickly and didn't have it in me to hash it out here out on the porch while you were up here sick. But I did end up getting his number and offered for us to meet again to fully talk if I was ready and still haven't reached out yet," he huffed, playing with Lucy's fingers to distract himself.
"It's a lot to be thrown at you at once," Lucy made a sympathetic sound, thumb soothingly tracing over the back of his hand. "Do you think you still want to meet with him to talk? Think you getting his number is a bit of a good sign?"
Natsu sat back up with her. "I hadn't even thought about it since you've been more important and we've had a lot on our plates, but maybe? I dunno honestly, I mean he's my… Igneel and our parents would want better for us, but what if there's too much hurt to work through and it doesn't get us anywhere? How can I trust him again after all this time?"
Lucy's expression softened. "Family issues are never easy to work through. But you and Igneel were able to rebuild that bridge again, and look at you guys now. I know it's different with your brother and it must be hard to see through all the years of hurtful memories, but from what it sounds like, he's been working on bettering himself and came all the way here to offer this olive branch of repairing things. I think it's worth a shot for your own healing too. Finally getting an explanation from him and maybe starting to let go of everything you've been holding onto." Her words held that usual warmth and strength that eased Natsu's nerves. He breathed deep at her soothing touch along his jaw. "You deserve to have this closure too, whatever you need it to be."
Natsu smiled softly and leaned into her touch. "Thanks, Luce. You always know what to say to get through my crazy thoughts."
"They're not crazy," Lucy chuckled softly. "It's ok to let yourself feel whatever you need to feel, no matter if it feels like it doesn't make sense."
Natsu hummed, turning to kiss her palm, pulling it down to hold between his palms. He smiled, grateful, heart swelling full of so much love for the woman beside him. He leaned closer, palm shifting to cradle to base of her neck, whispering soft words of love before pulling her in for a deep kiss that they both sighed and melted into.
"I love you more," Lucy whispered against him, arms winding around his neck as she moved closer against him before resuming the kiss with more emotion, pulling a soft sound from him.
She really did deserve the world.
Another week later, Natsu found himself pacing around, phone in his hand, going back and forth between Zeref's contact and closing the phone app all together. He ran a hand through his hair and slumped into the chair in Lucy's study, not wanting to be too far from her in case she needed anything from their room. She was still recovering well, almost back to her full energy, but he couldn't help still worrying.
You deserve to have this closure too, whatever you need it to be...
Lucy's supportive words rang through his mind again, giving him one more push to tap on the name on the screen with a steadying sigh.
His nerves shake with the couple rings that go by before there's an answer.
"Hello?"
"Hi... it's me," Natsu managed to get out.
"Oh, hi Natsu," Zeref said warmly, some relief in his voice.
"Sorry for not reaching out until now. Things got a bit, uh well, a lot hectic for a while and had a lot on my mind," Natsu said, running a hand through his hair.
"No need to apologize. It was a lot to ask of me, and I didn't expect anything. Just grateful you did call and to be talking to you now."
Natsu allowed himself to relax a little back into the chair from his pacing.
A part of him was glad to be talking to his brother again too.
"I wanted to see if you'd still wanna meet and talk more sometime soon? There's this spot by the lake here I like to go to. Quieter than the restaurants," Natsu offered, fingers fidgeting with the material on the arm of the chair, almost expecting Zeref to automatically decline.
"Absolutely, just let me know when and I'll be there. I'm up for any time."
Some relief flowed through him and they went over some schedules and settled for an afternoon this weekend, and even though Natsu's nerves still linger at the thought, there's no point in dragging things out no matter how this is gonna go.
"Sounds good. Thanks for calling, I'll see you then, Natsu."
Natsu sighed deeply after agreeing and ending the call.
One step down.
He walked back over to their room, smiling softly at the comforting sight of Lucy sitting up against the headboard now munching on some snacks as she watched one of her shows. It made him happy to see her doing so much better.
"Hi, you. How did it go?" she asked warmly when she saw him, reaching an arm out for him.
Natsu of course went willingly, flopping across the bed, wrapping an arm around her, pulling her close face against her waist with a groan.
Lucy laughed softly. "It couldn't have been that bad." Her hand found its way through his hair, making him sigh in content.
"Not as much as I was building it up to be. We're supposed to meet this weekend."
"See, told you'd have it in you to take the next step," Lucy said, smile in her voice.
"Mm, what would I ever do without your magnificent wisdom, babe," Natsu smiled brightly, shifted onto his back, head in her lap to look back up at her, holding her hand against his chest.
"So lost, my dear. But don't worry, luckily you don't have to worry about that," Lucy chuckled, playful glint in her eyes that he'd missed. Happy she was feeling more and more like herself.
His expression shifted with a sigh. "I felt nervous like this before meeting with Igneel again after all that time, but this just feels different, I dunno," he said softer.
Lucy hummed, lacing their fingers together with a soft squeeze.
"You grew up together, it makes sense that this hits you more. But just keep an open mind, and take whatever happens next in stride."
Natsu nodded with a soft smile. "Sure you'll be ok here? I can always try for another day if you need me to stay or anything or-"
"Natsu, you've fretted over me enough the past couple weeks," Lucy chuckled with an affectionate shake of her head. "Which I greatly appreciate, but I promise I'll be ok with a little space for a day. I can always call one of the girls if anything, but Happy will keep me plenty company, don't worry. Don't put this off if you're ready."
Happy just continued to purr away asleep on the headboard above them.
"Ok, ok," Natsu pouted playfully, smile tugging at his lips at her soft laugh.
"Besides, you need to bring me back a box of those amazing cookies we had the last time we were there. Need to keep up my strength after all."
It was Natsu's turn to laugh warmly, pressing a kiss to her hand before getting up to kiss that beautiful smile.
"Whatever your heart desires, my love."
Natsu found a free table underneath some nice shady trees once he got to the park by the lake. He took a deep steadying breath as he looked out towards the calm water ahead, checking his watch for the time. He was a little early, but it gave him time to clear his head a bit.
There were so many things he'd wanted to ask or say to him that had built up over the years, but was always quick to shut them down, figuring he'd never even see him again. Was he going to be able to get anything out now? Were they even going to be able to resolve anything? He knows their parents would've been sad that they reached this point and they would want better for them, but what if it was all too late…
"Hi, Natsu."
A warm voice eventually broke his thoughts, looking over to see Zeref there with a small smile.
"Hey, glad you made," Natsu managed to get out, clearing his throat a bit.
"A shocker I'm even on time too I'm sure," Zeref chuckled, setting a bag on the table between them and taking a seat across from him. "Now, hope you still enjoy your share of food, I brought a little more than we agreed on."
Natsu allowed himself a warm laugh as he watched him take out some bags of chips and large sandwiches, his stomach rumbling at the sight.
"Don't think that'll ever change. Good thing I did too." He pulled up his own bag of drinks and more snacks. Even though he still had some nerves, he figured it'd be easier to keep his hands busy to get through this whole thing.
"Ah good," Zeref smiled easily. "Take your pick," he offered, holding out the large sandwiches.
Natsu smirked and took the larger looking one, quick to unwrap it and take a big bite. "Mm, these are good," he murmured, digging into the chips too.
Zeref nodded with a soft chuckle, being more careful with his own.
Things were quiet between them for a bit as they ate. Natsu just took the time to practice his deep and steady breathing habits he'd been trying to keep up with the advice from his therapist, taking in the soft sound of wind through the trees, lapping of the water in the lake already helped to ground him too. He's glad they decided on here and not in some crowded noisy place.
"Thanks again for calling and agreeing to talk again. Have you been doing ok?"
Natsu looked over at Zeref who broke the silence and nodded. "Yeah, things have just been a bit… busy," he offered, still not quite sure how much he was willing to tell him just yet.
Zeref hummed in acknowledgment. "I get it. Things have been pretty non-stop for me too for a few years and since- um, since I moved back last year." There was a sheepish look in his eyes that Natsu wasn't used to.
Natsu raised a brow, hands stilling on the bottle his fingers were fidgeting with. "You've been back for that long?"
Zeref hummed. "Ever since I first left, crashing on couch to couch, random floors in who knows what city or town, I always felt this pull to make it back here." He looked lost in his thoughts for a long moment before focusing back on Natsu. "Once I finally got things back on track and found myself back here… around all the familiar places and memories o-of us, of them, it almost hurt too much, but I had to fully face all the mistakes I'd left here and heal from them. It still didn't fully feel like home just yet because… because I didn't have you back in my life and I knew I still had to make things right, it just took me that long to work up the courage to walk up to your door," he finished with a heavy sigh.
"It does, it did take a lot for you to take this step, I'll give you that," Natsu said softly. "It was definitely a surprise, and seeing you right in front of me like that was the last thing I was expecting after all these years. I'm glad that you finally reached a turning point and that you do seem and look like you're doing well and finally healthy, but it's just hard for me to see and move past all those years of hurt, y'know?" He felt his voice shake by the end, chest tightening as he sensed the conversation shifting.
Zeref nodded solemnly, his hands clasped together. "I know, and I don't expect you to. All these apologies don't feel like enough but I truly am. I never meant to hurt you as long and as much as I did, Natsu. You and Igneel never deserved any of it," he swallowed thickly, looking back over towards the lake and the slow rippling water it held. "After everything happened I just… I lost sight of myself, everything, and just fell into this hole and kept falling… After all the shitty homes I was tossed around in growing up, people took a chance on an older broken kid like me… and I met Mom and Dad, met you, all of you just accepting me as part of the family right away and just seeing me as your brother. Even when I didn't feel like I belonged," he smiled soft and sad. "It took me long enough to stop fighting all the good they were offering, to stop feeling like I didn't deserve you all, that they wouldn't just realize that I wasn't worth keeping and take me back to those other homes… I finally felt like I had a family, genuine people who cared about me, who I let myself be l-loved by and I loved in return… the years growing up with you all in a house that truly felt like my first home is something I'll never trade for anything... But- all just- just for them to get ripped away so quickly like that." His eyes and strained voice held such tangible emotion and Natsu's chest ached as they both were probably recalling the same memories.
"I didn't cope well and things just kept spiraling," he said with a shaking voice now, fingers fidgeting. "The negative thoughts in my head grew stronger, the ones that told me that they were right and I never deserved anything good in the first place and that's why they were taken from me. I was so angry at myself too for being that dumb moody teenager who didn't want to go to his kid brother's baseball game with you all, how I could've had one more day with them, how I could've maybe done something to help, and how much I just wished it just could've been me instead of them and they could still be here." Zeref may have barely whispered that part, but the words still struck Natsu's chest sharply. "I couldn't even face going to the hospital that night when Igneel had called me to see them or you… or to the f-funeral, which I'll always regret. I had it in my head that I didn't deserve to be there with you all, to mourn them with you, that I always just brought all this hurt and destruction to everything good in my life and now it had taken your parents from you. I thought it would be better to spare you of myself at least. It took me a long time to work through and process all that years later, but the memory of me stumbling into the house barely conscious from drinking myself numb for days after missing the funeral, seeing Igneel's disappointed face, and your eyes full of hurt will always be a regret that stays with me too. I'm sorry," he breathed a shuddering sigh, quiet for a few long moments before continuing.
"I had tried alcohol here and there before that since I was already hanging around not the greatest people by then, but after losing Mom, Dad, and almost you, caring about myself or anything became the lowest priority and it was easy to fall into it more and let myself give into the temptation of heavier drugs and h-hurting myself. It was easier to stay numb and in that hazy fog in general. Easier than going home and having to face all the happy memories, face the reality that everything had changed for the worst," he swallowed thickly, running a hand through his hair, Natsu just trying to absorb it all. "Igneel and whatever teachers tried to set me straight when I started to slack off more in school, ditching, but I didn't want to listen and then I just flat out didn't go back. Would go off on whatever binge I was on for days, barely have the strength to make it home. I put you through seeing me like that for so long, you were young and I- I was just so absorbed in my own hurt, self depreciation, self loathing, when you were hurting just as much as I was, probably more. You needed me and I wasn't there for so long and I just kept hurting you," Zeref's voice cracked, quick to wipe away a couple tears that were falling now.
Natsu ran a hand through his hair too with a heavy sigh, chest aching. The memories of Zeref stumbling past Natsu's room in the middle of most nights were pretty common, him staying holed up there for days, becoming a shadow of himself. Before Natsu fully realized what was going on, he would try to ask Zeref if he was ok and only get mumbled words back or would snap at him. Igneel would just give him a sad look.
Natsu took in the stretch of silence to gather his thoughts. "Thank you, for sharing all that. Know it's hard to dig up all this. But of course, now, I can see how you fell down that path," Natsu started, finding his voice "How much you were struggling even before everything happened. Then things got really shitty and chaotic and we all tried to find ways to cope. I could've easily followed your destructive lead, but Igneel kept me from drowning in grief… tried to keep you above water too, and I was just trying to get you to look at me or talk to me. Had me thinking it was something I did to push you away at some point too," Natsu rasped, swallowing thickly, trying to keep the complicated emotions he already felt bubbling at bay, a sympathetic look on Zeref's face. "Watching you slowly become this… shell, a version of you I didn't even recognize… hurt just as much as losing them. I just kept thinking, we all loved you so much, how could you have just not cared about Mom and Dad and not show up for them or me like that? Always just going back to your shitty friends. By the time you left the few years after, I already knew l-lost my brother too. You had mentally checked out long before that," Natsu said softly, lump already thick in his throat. "You had so many chances to let us in and work through things together. Igneel held onto hope for you for so long, hoping you'd come around and realize how bad things had gotten, I did too but part of me already knew you wouldn't, already off in some far place neither of us could reach. And sure enough, right when Igneel got serious and was gonna get you serious help after that night, you chose to be selfish and run. Run to go and bury yourself in your safe place of self destruction while we were the ones that stayed behind and tried to hold the broken pieces together." He roughly brushed away his own tears that had begrudgingly escaped now, frustration welling in his chest. "Some good all that work did though. Igneel got distant pretty soon after that too, but that's his own story to tell, then soon it was just me. At least I had good friends around me by then, but I had to hold myself together the best I could for a long time," he sighed, heart heavy, looking up to lock their eyes with a weighted look. "Some days I'd let myself have that brief hope that you'd come back, but then I would remember that your precious drugs and liquid courage were obviously always more important."
Zeref flinched, eyes swirling with emotion. "I more than deserve all your anger and hurt, but it was never anything you did I promise, or that I didn't care about you all. I'd been so wrecked by what happened and couldn't see past my own pain. I thought I was letting you have a better life without me." He swallowed thickly. "Then as much as I had been stumbling along, I-I really couldn't face you both after Igneel found me that night I almost… y'know." He palmed the back of his neck. "Waking up in the hospital, not even realizing how I'd gotten to such a low point. Too much in a faded daze to realize all the pills I'd taken to drown out all my loud static of thoughts almost won... and once I woke up to Igneel's sad and even more disappointed face, I had wished they had... I didn't even have it in me to want to keep living. Everything felt like too much and I knew he would insist on that I go into real rehab, but I… didn't want to face the reality of what it would take to get clean. I didn't think I could even stop. There was still a lot I wasn't willing to face at the time, I felt like I was too far gone past getting better, like there was no point. I already hated myself for putting you both through all my bullshit for so long, how could I go back home just to hurt and disappoint you too, more than I already had now that I had reached this new low. My head was constantly telling me you deserved better, so yes I ran. Further and further until I was numb from everything, even myself. I… I thought it would be easier on you both for me to just take myself out of the picture for good. Of course I was wrong."
Natsu's heart ached. It hurt to remember, but of course that night has stayed with him. The tangible fear in Igneel's voice that startled Natsu awake as he yelled out after apparently finding Zeref in a bad state in the bathroom in the middle of the night and he was rushing out the door with Zeref in his arms. The couple days in the hospital, worry filled sleepless nights until Zeref woke up, only to come back the next day and find him gone. Igneel hadn't gone into much detail at the time since he was rather young, but it wasn't until much later Natsu had learned that Zeref had made an attempt on his own life.
"You were wrong. What hurt more was seeing my brother suffering and not wanting to let us in to be there for you, which we would have and would've done anything, but you just would rather be alone and go off to waste your life and run yourself into the ground. W-We loved you. Missed you."
Zeref nodded with a soft, sad smile. "This is all not meant to be excuses, just what was going through my dumb head the whole time. I owed this explanation to you. I was a coward all that time and all the distance and hurt was because of my own self destructive doing. I never stopped thinking about you or loving you both either," Zeref said warmly. "I really had to learn the hard way and it took another- we'll, several more close calls, finally going through intensive rehab, and a lot of therapy work over the years to get my life on a decent track," he sighed through a shaking breath. "I just hate that I let myself lose so much time with you and Igneel, the last of my first real family. Missing so much of each other's lives."
Natsu took a deep, slow breath, taking some time to just take everything in. As much as the memories hurt to dig up, he feels like he understands the man across from him a bit better. As well as the hurt, broken boy of his past. It didn't erase all the years of pain, but now that he was older it did put it into perspective seeing things from both sides. How much miscommunication there was, so much that could've been avoided. But life was funny like that.
"It makes me sad how much time we lost too, how much we all had to hurt to get to where we all are now. There was so much I found myself wishing I could've shared with you over the years, hoping you were ok out there somewhere," Natsu said softly. "But I do see all the broken pieces you've had to carry too and you had to go through what you did in your own way, learn from it and heal from it to get to this point. I'm glad that sobriety is treating you well too, I can see how hard you've worked for that. To see you finally healthy as you always deserved to be, and even though just one talk doesn't fix everything for us… Mom, Dad, and Igneel would be proud of you and I-I am too honestly," Natsu swallowed thickly, bit of fluttering in his chest, finding that he really did mean that.
Zeref breathed through a wet chuckle, drying his eyes again. "All I can say is thank you. It's all I've wanted from all this work, to make you all proud. It's still a lot for me to ask, but I hope one day you both can forgive me. For everything." Natsu smiled softly with a nod. He hoped they could get there one day too. "Speaking of, have you heard from Igneel? Do you think he would give me a chance to hear me out like this too?" Zeref asked quietly, eyes suddenly nervous.
Natsu's smile grew. "We actually just reconnected like this and worked through our own things the other year too. I was nervous we wouldn't be able to, but now it feels like we never had all that distance between us and like he's just my dad again. He asked me about you then so of course he'd be happy to talk to you and even more to see you doing good like this," he reassured warmly. "I'll let him know and give him your number." Zeref sighed in relief with a warm smile and nod of affirmation. "So, how has life been treating you since you've turned this new page?" Natsu continued, taking a long soothing drink.
"It's been surprisingly good," Zeref shared warmly, looking back across towards the lake again. "After I finished up rehab, I was struggling to find any kind of purpose, but they helped me stick with therapy, connect me with programs where I was able to get my GED, then get in touch with a local trade school where I took up an IT computer program and now work in that. Coffee, or any kind of caffeine really, became my new crutch pretty quickly," he chuckled softly, turning said bottle of green tea in his hands. "So, I often visited this coffee shop close to the school where I met Mavis." His expression melted into one of such warm love that had Natsu thinking, Ooh, it was like that, huh. "She's amazing and beautiful, was in one of the nursing programs there too, and there was no way I ever thought I had a shot with her or felt like I deserved her. But we became close pretty quickly and I fell for her hard. She became my rock and helped me through countless ups and downs through my recovery. I was determined to become the kind of man she deserved… and we've been together these past ten years that I've been sober, married for five, and we have two sons who are seven and two."
There was a brighter, slightly shy grin on his face now as he looked back at him and Natsu couldn't help but match it.
"Wow, married and kids? You're really an adult now, huh?" Natsu teased playfully.
Zeref huffed a laugh. "I'm gettin' old and am almost forty now, I better be."
Natsu shared in the soft laughter too before his expression softened. "But really, that's amazing to hear and I'm happy for you. Glad you finally were able to find that worth you needed in your life and share that with someone."
Zeref smiled softly, nodding. "Y'know, as hard as I was working on getting my life to this point, and still am, you were still missing from it. You all were always lingering in my head and heart and I knew I had to make this push… to make things right and be the man and brother you always deserved too." He paused for a long moment before continuing. "More so once we were wanting a quieter life in a smaller town than in the bigger city we were in and found ourselves moving back here, so close to you but still so far… How can I raise them to have a kind and loving sibling relationship while ours had been broken for so long," Zeref breathed deep. "The kids deserve to know their uncle and full family, just as much as I want you all in ours."
Natsu swallowed thickly past the stubborn lump of emotion that was still lingering in his throat. Picturing himself having such an important role like that in the kid's life, almost overwhelmed his heart.
"Well, uh, as much as I'm struggling to picture you as a dad in general," Natsu started with a rough laugh, pulling one from Zeref too. "I'd… I'd really love to meet them and for all of us to be a f-family again."
Zeref's expression softened with soft words of thanks and a slow, almost hesitant reach to squeeze over Natsu's hand and his heart warmed at the touch.
"So, how about you and your life since then?"
Natsu breathed deep, gathering his thoughts again. "Well, I stuck as a moody kid and teenager after everything, always causin' some kinda trouble, but I was just able to graduate high school and didn't have much of a direction. Then my best friend, Gray and I decided to enlist in the marines. It was hard for me to stay in the house on my own back then, so I liked the thought of being able to get out for a while, hopefully start to find myself and see the world. I managed to find a bit of a drive with them. Got deployed out a lot, but also got roughed up out there more than I would've liked," Natsu chuckled. "But was able to move up to the Sergeant rank eventually and after twelve years serving, Gray and I finally got to the end of our latest contract and got to come home for good."
"Wow, that's a lot for you to have gone through all those years. I'm glad you made it back safely too," Zeref said, bit of concern in his eyes. "How've you been feeling now?"
"Thank you. I've been getting some help with some ptsd and mental stuff with therapy too, and still struggle with some migraines and flare ups from older injuries, but I've been doing better than before and still pushing through," Natsu sighed. "It had also gotten harder to be away the past few years since I have, uh, since I've been in an important relationship with someone really special for a while, so I'm happy to finally be home with her." A warm smile grew on his face, chest swelling with affection as he thought of Lucy.
"Ah, the friend that you said was at the house that day wasn't just a friend after all, huh?" Zeref grinned, playful and knowingly.
"Not really," Natsu laughed sheepishly, palm at the back of his warm neck. "Her name's Lucy and she'd moved here from a bigger city too a few years ago. Ended up having a mutual friend of ours we got to meet through and I thank the universe every day that we did. We became fast friends, best friends, and I couldn't help fallin' for her. She's my everything and has gotten me through a lotta rough times here and overseas, and building our lives together at the house has been amazing. We actually just celebrated our three year anniversary back in November... then she got really sick recently, which was what had me so distracted lately," he said warmly.
"Oh, no. I'm sorry, and here I went and threw me showing up on you too. Timing was never my strong suit," Zeref sighed.
"It's ok, this would've happened at some point anyway, and she's been doing much better now," Natsu reassured with a soft smile. "Been annoyed at me for still wantin' to help her with everything," he chuckled, picturing her irritated pout at him for still helping her up and down the stairs.
"Ah, sounds like me with Mavis when she was going through the pregnancies," Zeref smiled fondly. "So admirably independent, but we can't help but want to take care of them."
Natsu laughed with a nod. "That's for sure."
"That's so great though. I'm really happy and proud of you, Natsu. I've always proud of you, I should have said it more. But I'm glad life has treated you well now. You deserve everything good you have," Zeref said softly.
"Thank you. So do you, y'know." Natsu allowed fond warmth to flow through him with his next words. "It's gonna take a bit of work for us to try and get back what we had, but I'm… I'm glad we took this first step. Maybe um, maybe you and the family can come by the house sometime soon? Have some dinner. I can grill up some good stuff now." He found himself offering happily, almost surprised at how right it felt. "I'll tell the old man too, but like I said you gotta have this talk with him too first," Natsu insisted, pointing a playful finger at him.
Zeref's eyes were a bit glossy again, full of emotion, with a soft smile and a nod. "I definitely will. I'm more than willing to work back to that for us all. I'm glad we were able to take this step too. There's still so much I have to make up to you, but thank you... I'd love that. Means so much."
They cleaned up after a bit more catching up and when they made it back towards the parking and said goodbyes, Zeref offered his hand for a tentative handshake. Natsu found himself with a wide smile and just pulled him in for a tight hug instead, realizing he'd become a bit taller than is brother now. It must've taken Zeref by surprise, Natsu feeling him tense for a moment before sighing against his shoulder and slowly hugging Natsu back just as tightly, making Natsu's eyes prick a bit. The warm embrace got to Natsu more than he was expecting too.
Once Natsu made it back into his truck, he smiled softly to himself. To think that the tight ball of nerves that Natsu had in his chest when he got here had tempered into this contented warmth he didn't expect. Not one of complete forgiveness just yet, but one of finally letting go of some of those heavy weights he'd been carrying for far too long and he was looking forward to this new chapter with his brother, healing from their shared hurt.
He couldn't wait to go back home and share all this with Lucy, heading in the direction of her favorite bakery for her cookies, knowing she'd already be proud of him for taking this step. He was rather proud of himself too, not even thinking he'd entertain the thought of doing this years ago.
Guess he was growing up after all.
Hi, missed you guys! Hope you enjoyed a bit of everything this time! I packed in a lot for you! I never get tired of some classic hospital hurt/comfort and with all the worry Natsu's put Lucy through, felt like a good chance for it to be his turn to be there for her ;)
Ah Natsu and Zeref beginning to patch things up! Wanted to give them that chance too ❤️ Know reconnecting any kind of estranged relationship is never easy and is different for everyone, but I kind of put a bit of my own hopeful emotions for someone I always wished I could fix things with ❤️
Let's also pretend I said Zeref was adopted in the beginning of the story lmao
Thanks for reading, till next time!