For the first time in years, Gaara heard nothing.
He could no longer hear Mother.
(She isn't your mother. That isn't what Hari said. Your mother loved you)
Gaara didn't trust anyone else in the room. Gaara could still clearly recall Mother's demands for blood.
It didn't help that they were all leaf shinobi. Gaara was well-aware that their alliance was all but in name.
His father made his frustrations quite clear to Gaara whenever he expressed his disappointment in Gaara. He wanted Gaara to be stronger. He wanted Gaara to be able to head tall so they could stand shoulder to shoulder with Konoha.
He wanted Gaara to be a strong weapon, but Gaara was a failed experiment. That's why the Kazekage wanted him dead. That's why his uncle also wanted him-
Ah, but Hari said Yashamaru loved him. The leaf shinobi also helped him feel true peace, instead of trying to kill him.
That was probably the most absurd part of this entire situation. His own village didn't help him, but the leaf shinobi did.
Hari followed through with his words as well. Does that mean the rest of what he said was trust as well?
Hope was something that was cruel to a child of the desert. They struggled everyday. Hope was something that would easily slip through their fingers like the grains of sand in a dying village.
Blood was a lot easier to spill than water.
But Hari kept his promise. Hari helped him. For once, Gaara felt peace.
Peace was a bit of a lie though. The silence was as unnerving as it was relieving.
"Are you feeling okay?" Hari asked with a gentle smile on his face. Hari even gently patted his head, as if Gaara was a dog.
Gaara reflectively flinched at the touch, but it wasn't unwelcome.
It felt nice.
Gaara didn't trust his words. He just hesitantly nodded.
Hari's smile grew.
"Guess the old pervert wasn't useless after all," Hari remarked and Gaara could see the old man sputter in indignation.
"My name is Jiraiya! Ji-raiya! How come Tsunade gets respect but I don't?" the old man named Jiraiya loudly complained. He flailed a lot. It reminded Gaara of a shinobi gasping for help, before Gaara crushed them.
"Because Tsunade isn't a pervert and actually has some dignity. I don't respect perverts who creep on vulnerable women," Hari answered clipply. Hari looked down at Gaara. "Listen to me, Gaara. Being a pervert is a sign of weakness. We should always respect women, especially mothers and grandmothers. They have more wisdom, strength, and love than anyone else can understand."
Gaara flicked his eyes to Jiraiya slowly. He also noticed how relaxed Hari was in their presence.
"Aren't they your ally? Aren't you a leaf shinobi?" Gaara asked, tilting his head in confusion.
Hari snorted.
"Maybe I was once upon a time, but I haven't stepped foot in that village for years. I don't belong to any village. The entire Kage system and shinobi system is dumb. It creates idiots like your father," Hari said with a playful wink, before ruffling Gaara's hair. "I just cashed in some favors and it worked. They helped you, didn't they?"
"You say the entire Kage system is dumb, but you passed on my brother's message about me being Hokage?" Tsunade said with a scoff, before shaking her head. "Though I do agree with you. Jiraiya never did have any common sense. Why else do you think I punched him so much through the years?"
"Hey! I will have to tell you that the research is very important for me to create the works of art that I do- Wait," Jiraiya said, before his head snapped to Tsunade. His mouth was gapping. "Nawaki? He wants you to be Hokage?"
Tsunade scoffed. "Well, according to that asshole who is as cryptic as ever."
Hari shrugged in response. He didn't make a comment at Tsunade's words.
Gaara watched the other closely. Hesitantly, Gaara reached out and tugged on Hari's clothes.
"How did you know about my mother? How did you talk to my uncle?" Gaara asked softly.
Immediately, the entire room fell silent at his question.
Gaara could see Jiraiya looking at Hari speculatively before his eyes flickered to Tsunade and then Gaara.
Tsunade also crossed her arms defensively, as if this topic brought up old wounds.
Hari hummed.
"Well, let me tell you a little secret. The most powerful technique in the world is a mother's love," Hari said casually, but Jiraiya scoffed loudly.
"Isn't that a bit too cliché, don't you think? Do you know how many forbidden techniques are out there? Plus the countless kenkai genkai? That doesn't even include sage mode and bijuus. A loving mother isn't going to stop assassinations and wars," Jiraiya said quite cynically. Jiraiya was skeptical, but his words flowed off of Hari's back easily.
"And this is why we don't listen to perverts, Gaara," Hari said seriously while completely ignoring Jiraiya's question. Jiraiya sputtered once more, but Hari pushed onwards.
"Quite ironic when a mother's love goes hand-in-hand with the Will of Fire, yet we have the loyal shinobi scoffing at the concept," Hari said while shaking his head in disappointment.
Gaara could see the leaf shinobi's point though. Gaara was sure that the people he had killed before had a mother who loved them. Yet, that didn't protect them.
Gaara was confused and lost.
Hari held a finger to his lips.
"Can't be revealing all my secrets, now can I? Trust me though, Gaara. Your mother's love is protecting you even now. I sense it so strongly, it is drenching your sand and your heart. Your mother died to protect you. That's the most powerful technique in the world," Hari said softly, before grinning widely. "As for your uncle, that's easy. I talked to him! Just the same as with Tsunade's little brother!"
Gaara's whole body jolted.
Jiraiya's eyes burned angrily.
"Are you working with Orochimaru!? If you dared to mess with his body and spirit, I swear I will kill you!" Jiraiya said fiercely and even stood in front of Tsunade protectively.
Gaara thought that was rather dumb. If anything, the pervert should be standing behind Tsunade.
Tsunade seemed to agree. The lady pushed Jiraiya aside.
"Jiraiya, he doesn't work with Orochimaru. Well, as far as I know, but I doubt it," Tsunade said while shaking her head. "I've known Hari for quite a long time."
Jiraiya gave Tsunade a look and they had a silent conversation, which ended with Tsunade shrugging.
Jiraiya sighed.
Hari, on the other hand, raised his eyebrows.
"Who the hell is Orochimaru?" Hari asked and his face was bewildered.
Tsunade waved Hari off.
"He's an old teammate of ours. Experimented on kids and fled the village. Traitor and all that," Tsunade said, before flickering her eyes up and down Hari. "I actually thought your condition was because of him before. It crossed my mind, but the timelines don't match up. Not to mention, I'm pretty sure he would lose a few limbs if you got your hands on him. Well, then again, he's a slippery one. You definitely cannot underestimate him either."
Hari's entire face darkened.
"He experimented on children?" Hari said frigidly. "And here I thought the Leaf couldn't sink any lower."
Jiraiya huffed loudly. "Don't lump Konoha with that traitor! Why do you think I spend so much time trying to track that bastard down!?"
Hari's iciness thawed a bit. His face went back to his unimpressed default.
"I guess that might be a slight point in your corner, but I am sure it was probably for the "good of Konoha" that those experiments even started. I am sure if I dig into it, more skeletons will emerge. The entire system was fucked up from the start," Hari said flatly, shaking his head.
Gaara bit his lip nervously, before he tugged on Hari's clothes again.
"Do I have to go back?" Gaara said slowly.
Hari's face softened.
"I promised your uncle that you could go back if you wanted to," Hari said softly.
Gaara's mind flashed to his father and the backs of his siblings. He shook his head.
"I don't want to," Gaar said resolutely. "Can I stay with you?"
Hari shrugged and grinned widely, before ruffling Gaara's hair.
"Why not? Fuck the entire system! You are welcome to come along with me. It's guaranteed to be a lot of wandering though. Do you mind?" Hari asked, but Gaara shook his head. He hated his village anyways.
Hari felt like someone Gaara could trust. Perhaps he was going to hurt himself more with this decision, but he couldn't help but trust the man.
"Okay, so you don't work with Orochimaru. How did you talk to Nawaki though? You don't mean you can talk to spirits or something, right?" Jiraiya said with a snort.
Hari smirked at Jiraiya.
"So what if I could?" Hari said smugly.
Jiraiya scoffed. "Then you're a crazy medium or something."
Tsunade rolled her eyes.
"I am tired of all your bickering! I need to get back to Shizune sometime tonight. Jiraiya, he can see the dead. Apparently the dead who have regrets, or something like that. He won't tell me anything else though," Tsunade said bitterly.
Jiraiya looked at Tsunade curiously, before turning to Hari.
"That's a rather useful technique you have. Does it have something to do with your eyes?" Jiraiya prodded.
Hari sighed loudly and rubbed his temples.
"You are asking way too many questions. I don't have time to deal with this shit. I don't want to get involved with Konoha and all the other Hidden Villages. I just warned to help a dead kid though, okay? Nawaki was stuck wandering the world because he wanted his older sister and his old sensei to be happy. He regretted leaving his sister alone and his teacher. That's such a sad regret, don't you think? A kid like that should be wanting to live a long life and have lofty goals. Instead, that is what I got. Something so simple, yet so out of reach for him. The entire system fucked him over, like they do with all the kids." Hari genuinely looked quite upset and looked like he was ready to punch Jiraiya in the face if he kept pushing.
Honestly, Gaara was rooting for the old man to get punched. He deserved it.
Still though, there was a fragile hope growing in Gaara's chest.
Yashamaru.
"Can I talk to Yashamaru?" Gaara asked quietly.
Hari looked at Gaara, before he ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.
"I mean, you can," Hari told him in a conflicted tone.
"But?" Gaara asked and Hari sighed.
"He finally left the world with no more regrets after I promised to help you. He's experiencing the next great adventure. When they are finally able to move on, I don't think they should be summoned anymore. Clinging to the dead is dangerous, Gaara. I've seen what it can do to people. Your uncle is at peace now. Maybe I'll let you talk to him, but when you're a bit older, okay?" Hari offered to him and Gaara nodded along.
"I understand. Maybe if I'm older, but maybe it's also best to leave him at peace," Gaara answered and Hari ruffled his hair once more.
"You're a smart kid. Most people wouldn't be able to make that decision."
Maybe touch was Hari's love language or something. Surprisingly though, Gaara was growing to love it.
"So, you promised Gaara's uncle to help him, right?" Jiraiya suddenly said.
Gaara frowned at the old man for interrupting their moment. Hari even removed his hand from his head.
Hari was eyeing the shinobi warily.
"Yeah, what about it?" Hari asked as if he had a bad feeling of where this was going.
Jiraiya grinned widely.
"You made the same promise to Nawaki, didn't you? The kid who can't rest peacefully because of his older sister and his teacher. Well, luckily for you, we have his sister in this room. I can give you a lead regarding his old teacher as well," Jiraiya said smugly. Gaara didn't like the arrogant look on his face.
"For what?" Hari said skeptically. The man was right to be skeptical.
Jiraiya laughed loudly, before swinging his arm around the man.
"Well, luckily for you, I'm an expert on his teacher! He happens to be my old teammate, hm? We have a common goal together! How about we head back to Konoha and get some leads, why don't we? Nawaki wanting his sensei to be happy might be a bit hard, but I am sure we can figure something out between the both of us. We don't want a twelve-year-old wandering for all of eternity, now can we?" Jiraiya laughed so loudly, Gaara thought he was going to explode.
Gaara didn't exactly like where this was going, and by the murderous look on his face, Hari didn't either.
*coughs awkwardly* Surprise…? I hope this longer chapter (by this fic's standard) makes up for the long wait! I really lost confidence in my writing, but I regained it this past year. I might be a bit rusty with writing for Naruto, but I hope this chapter was still enjoyable! Also, Gaara deserves all the head pats in the world, okay? And hm, anyone notice that a certain ANBU has no idea who else is coming along for the ride?