WOLVERINE AND SPIDER-MAN RPG ISEKAI EPISODE 1 : ENTERING BOAR BRAMBLE
Water…
…he was in the water.
With some level of struggle Wolverine managed to crack open his heavy eyelids.
He couldn't open them very wide…not yet. The sun was too bright. Tactically, he flexed his fingers and slowly re-oriented himself to his senses.
His face was pressed against wet stones and grit, and the lower half of his body was submerged in standing water. With a strained grunt and splash he pushed himself from the ground.
Squinting, he looked around.
He was on the edge of a shallow river. The bronze water sparkled intensely under the blinding mid-day sun and the tall trees of an elderly forest surrounded him on all sides.
"Oh fuck."
He ran a hand across his bleary eyes. He had no idea how he had gotten here.
He was in his suit so he must have been doing something professional-like. He noted his striped yellow costume. His mask was on his face.
With another grunt he levered himself to his feet. The river gravel crunched beneath his boots.
"What the fuck happened?" he continued to profane at himself. He rolled a shoulder trying to shake off the remaining grogginess and sniffed the air. After a few good huffs he scowled. This place didn't smell familiar at all. In fact, it didn't smell like any place he had smelled. It didn't smell right. It smelled wrong. This whole place was wrong.
He growled in growing frustration and continued to sniff the air. The plants smelled strange. The animals smelled strange. The air smelled strange. The…
He stopped.
A familiar scent had finally found him.
"Oh."
He wasn't alone out here.
Following the scent, Wolverine made his way downstream until a recognizable shape came into view. A red and blue figure was sprawled on his back in the river. He had been caught on a few large stones.
A spike of adrenaline shot through him. Splashing through the knee-high water he ran toward the man.
"Hey! Hey kid!"
He caught him.
"Spider-man!"
He wasn't moving.
Plucking him from the weak current, Wolverine pulled his drenched companion from the water and ran him to shore. Slapping him down on the gritty bank he yanked off his mask and threw an ear to his chest.
He was breathing. He was wet but his face was the right color. He was ok, he just wasn't awake.
Wolverine started jostling him, trying to stir him to consciousness.
"Hey kid, Spider-man! Wake up!"
Spider-man let out a painful groan.
"Uuuuuaaahhh,"
"Spider-man?"
His eyes cracked open and he turned to look at him.
"Wolverine?" he grunted.
"Yah kid. Come on back," he coached vigorously patting the side of his face.
Spider-man tried to wave him away.
"W, where are we?"
"No idea."
Spider-man let out a noise of disgust.
"Why am I wet?"
"'Cause you were in the river, genius."
Spider-man made another noise of disgust as Wolverine helped pull him to his feet.
Spider-man and Wolverine sat naked on the bank of the river. Gently swaying in the breeze, their soaked clothes were strung up on a web line.
"So, you really have no idea where we are?" asked Spider-man. He watched as a school of minnows congregated under his shadow on the water. He was strategically keeping his gaze away from the other man.
"Nope. Do you?" asked Logan bluntly.
"No," said Spider-man surprised at himself.
"Why is it whenever I end up in cloud cuckoo land it's always with you?" said Logan exasperated.
"You say that like you don't like me."
Logan gave him a look.
"Ouch."
"Well, I mean, we've ended up in worse places," continued Spider-man shrugging. "And in worse shapes."
"You mean you've ended up in worse shapes."
"You exploded once. I had to scoop you off the ground for hours."
"Oh yah. You put me in a bucket…like old mop water," said Logan raising an eyebrow.
"Yep, I'm traumatized to this day," said Spider-man chipperly. "But what I'm trying to say is, even though we have no idea where we are or how we got here, I think we're gonna be ok."
"Well of course we're gonna be ok. That was never the question. The question is how much of a pain in the ass is it gonna be to get home. I ain't got a clue where we are. It don't smell like no place I've ever been."
"Really? It doesn't just smell like the woods?"
"No woods I ever been in. Something's…wrong here."
"Are you serious?" asked Spider-man looking him in the eye.
Logan met his gaze. He didn't answer but his cold look was enough to get the point across.
"Oh,"
Spider-man suddenly became keenly aware of the towering trees that surrounded them. They were in a small patch of sunlight cut out by the river but only feet away on all sides was dark, thick, and gnarled understory.
"Well…" said Spider-man. "That's ominous."
He took a moment to look over his shoulder.
"So… think our clothes are dry yet?"
Logan finished pulling on his shirt.
"Dry enough," he grumbled.
"Say that after you've put your mask back on," said Spider-man doing just that.
"I think I'll just leave it off. Alright, let's figure out where we're going," he grunted.
Spider-man looked around.
"MMMmmmm…that way," he said pointing in some random direction.
"You actually sense something or you just guess'n?" asked Logan crossing his arms.
"You ask like I can actually tell the difference."
Logan rolled his eyes and started huffing the air.
"What is it boy? What'd you smell?" asked Spider-man.
"I'm gonna stab you," he snarled between sniffs.
He landed on a particular direction.
"I smell some livestock in that direction," said Logan pointing. "It's far, probably nine or ten miles."
"Goody, I've been craving an off-trail hike in socks."
"Come on, let's get moving," said Logan grinning a sharp smile.
The forest was even darker and more gnarled than it looked on the outside. The trees all had a grey, ashy-ness to them and the dim green leaves blocked out the sky. It was so dark that the forest floor was perpetually damp and brown and absolutely over run with massive fungi.
"Careful, don't step on that mushroom," said Spider-man pointing one out.
"Why?" asked Logan.
"Spider sense."
Logan grunted and stepped clear of it.
"It would have probably exploded into spores and killed us all," commented Spider-man as they passed. "Knowing our luck."
Wolverine constantly probed the air to keep them moving in the right direction. Spider-man followed a few steps behind.
"Wait, Logan, stop."
"Spider sense?" he asked.
"Yah."
"Where?"
Spider-man concentrated. Then he looked around confused.
"Uh, here…" He held his head.
Logan gave him a look then huffed the air.
"I don't smell anything," said Logan.
Spider-man looked around shaking his head.
"There's something here. I know there's something here. Worse than a mushroom."
"Hmm," grunted Logan.
A massive branch slammed into the mutant sending him flying.
"LOGAN!"
He careened into the thick trunk of a tree.
Spider-man dodged as the same branch whipped around toward him.
"Logan are you ok‽" he cried flipping out of the branch's reach.
Wolverine scrapped himself off the tree and back onto his feet.
"I'm always ok," he growled wiping a trickle of blood from his mouth.
"Oh good," said Spider-man calmly as he dodged a growing flurry of spike like branches. "Then maybe you could give me a hand because I think Treebeard is angry with us!"
With the sound of sliding metal Wolverine unsheathed his claws and charged at a mass of branches. Roots erupted from the ground and twisted around him. He snarled as they tightened aggressively around his legs attempting to dislocate and break his bones.
No such luck.
In a flurry of slicing thrusts, Logan cleaved his way through the woody tendrils.
"What is this thing‽" cried Spider-man trying and failing to web down an aggressive branch.
In a hard slash Logan hacked off the twist of limbs. Splinters flew in all directions. A hunk of lifeless wood fell to Logan's feet. He looked to where the branch had been severed and followed it to its source.
"It's…it's just a tree!" barked Wolverine staring up at it. It looked no different than any of the other trees but it was shaking and writhing like an angered animal. Another branch launched itself at him. He dodged and sunk his claws into it. Suddenly his wrist was stuck, his claws lodged in the dense wood.
He gasped and yanked.
Sending out a web line Spider-man flung himself in a flying kick toward the trunk. He crashed into it ineffectively and flopped to the ground.
"Owww!" he moaned.
"I just said it was a tree!" snapped Logan.
"Well, what's your plan‽" Spider-man snapped back.
Logan finally managed to slash through the branch freeing himself.
"Fucking amscray!"
Narrowly escaping another snare of roots, Spider-man made it back to his feet and bolted toward Logan. He flung himself through a barrage of branches, twisting and somersaulting through the growing numbers of skewers from above to tackle his team mate. Wolverine being an experienced Spider-friend instantly hung on as he was tossed onto his back. Thunderous crunches and snaps sounded all around them as twigs and debris rained down.
Spider-man barely swung them into the air just as the entire crown of the tree slammed down behind them.
"I think you can stop now!" barked Wolverine in Spider-man's ear.
"No way!" panted Spider-man. He was swinging them at full speed through the dense, bent trees. "I'm not stopping 'till we're out of this cursed af forest! Also…it's faster. I don't want to get stuck out here after dark."
Logan grunted but didn't push the issue.
Swinging through the woods was incredibly difficult, even in a normal forest. He had to stay much closer to the ground and had to constantly weave and dodge limbs and trunks. Occasionally he wouldn't register spider sense in time or not sense a smaller vine and end up crashing them through it.
Dodging a thick tangle of brambles Spider-man accidently slammed into a particularly thick branch. He cried out as he was thrown from his grip and they fell from the air.
After hitting what must have been every stick on the way down, they both hit the ground with a loud thump.
"Ow," said Spider-man blandly.
"Fuck! Even I saw that one!" snarled Logan pulling himself from the dirt. A bloody gash on his face instantly began to heal.
"Hey!" snapped Spider-man sitting up. "If you want to take over web swinging for a few miles I'd be happy to let you."
"Wait, shut it," said Logan looking around.
"What? We just started arguing."
"Shut up and look," said Logan.
Spider-man complied.
They were in a different forest.
That was the only way to describe it.
The trees were warm, brown, and straight. The leaves were a vibrant light green and the sun shown down on the mossy floor in dappled rays. Overhead birds chirped. Neither man had realized until now that they had been missing.
"How did that happen?" asked Spider-man.
"Don't know," said Logan. "But I ain't gonna complain." He brushed himself off and extended a hand to help Spider-man off the ground. He didn't take it.
"Uh, give me a minute," he said laying back down and panting. "Phew."
Logan snorted a laugh at him.
"Take the wind outta ya champ?"
"You're a lot heavier than you look," said Spider-man still catching his breath.
"Pure adamantium bub," said Logan with a grin. "That… and also this," he said holding up his arm. He still had his claws stuck in five-foot of branch.
Spider-man looked up at it then burst out laughing, throwing his head back into the dirt.
"Fucking tree," grunted Logan as he put the branch under his foot and started yanking his claws again. Finally, he was able to pull himself free.
"So, tree monsters, that's someth'n we gotta deal with," he said re-sheathing.
"Yah, something tells me we're not in Kansas anymore."
"Dusted off that old one did ya?" asked Logan. "Break anything on the way down?"
"Nope, don't worry" said Spider-man finally levering himself to his feet. "I broke the fall with my body," he grunted stretching his back.
"I think you broke the fall with my body."
"Nah, I broke the fall with your face."
"You know you kinda did," said Logan sourly before chuckling. He went back to sniffing the air.
"Well, this place sure smells better. It ain't right still but it ain't wrong."
"Because that makes sense."
"It's easier to smell out here too. We're pretty close to the livestock smell now."
Logan threw his nose to the breeze and sniffed harder.
"Actually, I'm smell'n people now too."
"People!" exclaimed Spider-man excitedly. "Hallelujah! Let's go that way!"
"That's what we been do'n."
As the pair continued making their way through the wilderness Logan commented, "they smell like they ain't too fond of bathing."
"Oh good," said Spider-man. "You'll fit right in."
After about another hour of hiking, at long last, civilization came into view. Wolverine and Spider-man stepped onto a dirt road leading into what looked like a medieval village.
"Well, this is quaint," said Spider-man as they walked into town. The buildings were cobbled, wattled and daubed, and roofed with wooden shakes. The villagers were plain but seemed well-tempered. "Did we get sent back in time again? Because you know I hate that."
"I don't remember the past hav'n no tree monsters in it."
"Yah you were there weren't you?"
They passed a wooden cart being hauled by a pair of cattle.
"Oh look, there's your livestock Wolvie," said Spider-man.
The driver did a double take as they walked by.
"This whole place smells like livestock," said Logan.
He looked over at Spider-man.
"Lose the mask bub."
"Um why?"
"You don't need it. We ain't anywhere that would care. 'Sides, you stick out too much."
Spider-man concurred and pulled the fabric from his face. He let out a small sigh of relief as his sweaty hair and face were exposed to the fresh air.
"Though, honestly, I'm not convinced it's going to help much," he said looking down at his vibrant, skin tight suit.
The pair finally entered the village properly as they stepped onto a cobbled road. It seemed to be the main street of the town with villagers wandering about. They moved cargo, shopped at stalls, stood around to shoot the breeze and just generally made their ways through their day.
"Ok so, we've made it into a town," said Spider-man looking around. "Now what?"
"Well first, I guess we need to figure out if we speak the same language as these guys," replied Logan.
Spider-man looked over to a random group.
"Hey!" he called at them.
"What?" one answered.
"Thanks!" said Spider-man. He turned back to Wolverine.
"Well, that solves that," said Logan unimpressed. "Next we…"
He was cut off by an awkward growl. They both looked down at Spider-man's stomach.
"Yah, that," said Logan.
"Come on. You can't say you're not starving too," exclaimed Spider-man defensively. "I don't even know the last time I ate. Literally!"
"We need to set up shop for the basics," said Logan. "Food, water, shelter. We ain't never gonna get home if we starve to death in the meantime. Water's probably not gonna be a problem but we need to find someth'n to eat and a place to sleep."
"And…how do we do that?" asked Spider-man putting his hands on his hips. "Do I need to start sharpening some sticks?"
"Well, it'd be easier if we had some money," replied Logan snidely as he started heading down the street.
"Yah, I really don't want to have to eat river fish or something," said Spider-man walking with him. "I hate camping."
Logan huffed.
"Yah right. You'd just end up eating poisonous berries and dying."
"What? I'm a good fisherman thank you very much."
Logan ignored him and lumbered over to a random citizen.
"Hey, where can I get a drink," he asked.
"Pub's the eighth building on the right," said the man pointing.
"Thanks."
He started in that direction.
Spider-man caught back up with him.
"I knew you were old but I didn't know you were senile. In case you've forgotten from two seconds ago, we don't have any money. Also, I know you're an alcoholic but it's like two o'clock."
"I ain't an alcoholic, and I ain't buy'n a drink. No one knows the town better than the bar keep. If anyone's look'n for hands he'll know."
"Oh. So, your plan is to get jobs?" asked Spider-man skeptically.
"Yep."
"Fair enough."
Spider-man's stomach growled again.
"Are we sure they won't accept MasterCard?" he asked.
"Pretty sure."
A flock of lazy birds waddled out of the way as Spider-man and Wolverine walked through.
"Alright, I'm about to eat a pigeon," said Spider-man.
"Go ahead. I won't look," said Logan opening the pub door.
"Wait what?"
The two stepped forward into the dim stone and wood room. It was practically empty save for a few particularly grizzly patrons in the odd corner.
"Well, you two are an odd-looking pair," said the barkeep as they approached. "Never seen you around before. Are you from out of town?"
"Yah, far out of town," said Spider-man.
"We're looking for work. Know anywhere?" asked Logan.
"Hm, nothing comes to mind," said the barkeep rubbing his head. "Bad time of year. Stop by in the fall and the local farmers will be begging you to come work for them."
Logan and Spider-man both frowned.
"However, you two ever do any adventuring? There's always quests to be done for the guild. If you two aren't fighters there may be a fetch quest available. I know a customer of mine last week earned thirty copper coins gathering wild raven's foot."
"Quests huh?" said Logan. "Sounds good. Thanks for the tip bub."
"Anytime. Come back and have a drink once you've earned some coin."
The pair left.
That same flock of lazy birds were lining up to be fed by a hunched old woman as they walked past.
Spider-man looked on them with slight envy. Logan kept his eyes straight forward as he made his way down the street in his usual aggressive lumber.
"Hey, um, Logan," asked Spider-man apprehensively. "Should we have maybe asked him where the guild was?"
Logan stopped.
"Oh."
Swinging open the heavy wooden doors, the pair entered the guild.
It was a grand old hall, probably one of the bigger buildings in town with exposed timber and a high vaulted ceiling. A few what could be assumed to be 'adventurers' were meandering around at the odd table here and there. Unlike the everyday villager, the adventurers were wearing an assortment of weapons, armors, robes, and generally eccentric gear.
At the far end of the room was a single long counter.
A round man with a full braided beard and a single arm stood behind it scribbling away into some large, dusty book. As Logan and Spider-man entered his eyes looked up to meet them.
"Blow me down!" he exclaimed as they made their way across the room. "You're an odd-looking pair. Looking to join the guild?"
"No, we came to enquire about your decorator," sassed Spider-man as he and Logan stepped up to the counter.
The man made a confused face at him.
"Uh, yah. We'd like to join the guild," said Spider-man.
"Splendid!" the man boomed. "We could always use another adventurer around here. I'm Boksee."
"Boxy?" asked Spider-man.
"Well, the description used to fit me better," he said slapping his hand to his beer gut with a laugh.
"I'm the guild master," continued Boksee. "I do the accounting, the queue-ing, the ranking, and pretty much anything else you can think of around here. I had to clean up a dead mud crab from the taxidermy the other day. We're a small guild in an even smaller town so we don't have a lot of hands, but we always have plenty of work. Maybe a little too much work. So, where you two from? I've never seen an outfit like that. Especially you," he said looking at Spider-man.
"Far," grunted Logan. "Very far."
"Mm," nodded Boksee. He took a moment to look the pair over. His attention landed on Wolverine. "Hey, are you a werewolf?" he asked Logan his brow furrowing.
"Huh? No," he answered bluntly.
"Alright, just checking."
"You got a problem with werewolves?" asked Spider-man.
"I don't discriminate," said Boksee bitterly putting his hand to his hip.
"Hm," mumbled Spider-man.
Boksee looked him over.
"Are you a werewolf?" he asked surprised.
"What? No!"
A few metal plated adventurers chatted casually in the corner. Another in leather made her way down from the upstairs.
"Let's just fill out your adventure sheet," said Boksee reaching down and throwing an enormous tome on the desk.
He flipped through the aging papers and pulled an ink quill.
"Alright then, what's your name lad," he asked turning to Spider-man.
"Uhhh… I'm…I'm Spider-man."
"Spider Man?"
"That's what they call me."
"Alright then," said Boksee scrawling it down. "And how about you?"
"Wolverine."
"The Spider-man and the Wolverine huh? You men know anything about adventurer ranks?'
They shook their heads.
"There are ten ranks with porcelain being the lowest and platinum being the highest. Everyone starts out as porcelain. The government usually scoops up the golds, the second highest, and platinums are practically unheard of. You'll usually only run into silvers at best doing guild work but we've only got one around here. I made it up to ruby myself back in the day."
"How do you move up the ranks?" asked Spider-man.
"You get nominated for evaluation, usually by yourself or other members of your party. You get evaluated and then if the evaluator, which is me, likes what they see you get a rank up. If they don't like what they see you don't, might even get demoted if you've really loused it up."
"What's the point of the ranks?" asked Logan.
"Prestige first and foremost, but more practically all quests will have a minimum rank requirement. The higher the rank needed the more the pay."
"Mm," grunted Logan nodding.
"The quests will be posted daily on the wall over there," said Boksee pointing. "When you find one you like bring it to me and I'll assign it to your queue."
"Alright men, here you are," said Boksee placing a pair of porcelain pendants on the counter. Logan and Spider-man took them.
"These are your adventurer tags. Wear them at all times. They show everyone your rank, your guild, and if you're too mangled to identify after a failed quest, they'll tell us who you were."
"Charming," said Spider-man as he and Logan slipped the pendants over their heads.
"Ah, it's been a while since I've had a proper pair of dog tags," said Logan looking down at his chest fondly.
"You're good to go gentlemen. Welcome to the Boar Bramble Guild!" he boomed.
"Boar Bramble," said Spider-man as they made their way over to the quest wall. "Ok, you can be the boar and I'll be the bramble."
"Hmm," grunted Logan. "Huh."
They joined just a couple other adventurers perusing the quest wall. Only about half the quest were left. The rest were just strips of ripped paper hanging from well-used nails.
"Aren't you two a bit old to be starting out?"
Spider-man and Wolverine looked over to see a female knight with long lavender hair giving them a contemptuous stare.
Logan raised an eyebrow at her. He glanced down at her chest. A silver tag clinked gently against her polished armor.
"What? Ok, him I understand, but me?" asked Spider-man offended.
"If you wanted to be an adventurer, you should have been bashing sewer rats five years ago," she said coldly.
She ripped down a flyer and walked away.
"What a jerk," said Spider-man.
"She probably ain't wrong."
"She doesn't know us."
Logan turned his attention to the quest wall.
"Exterminate Hoard of Rodents of Unusual Size in Sewer Under Courthouse," he read.
"Um, no thanks. I rather not come down with the bubonic plague."
"Don't knock it 'til you try it."
"Guess she was serious about the sewer rats. Oh, look. There are fetch quests. Here's one wanting a pound of wild mushrooms," said Spider-man pointing. "We know where those are."
"I ain't gathering mushrooms. Besides, pay's shit."
Spider-man made a face at him.
"Slay Thirty Boars in the Nehfar Woods," said Logan.
"I'm not killing a bunch of random forest animals."
Logan rolled his eyes.
"We could…no. That's an obsidian," said Spider-man continuing to scan the flyers.
"Exterminate Coven of Hags?" asked Logan.
"No."
"Goblins?"
"No! No exterminating!"
"I could just go without you," Logan threatened.
"Come on that's mean. Oh! How about this one?" said Spider-man pointing at a flyer. "Find and Return Lost Horse. It's our rank and you can just smell it down and find it right? Plus, it doesn't involve killing a bunch of random animals."
Logan looked at it.
"Fine," he said. He pulled down the flyer, ripping it from his nail. "You're lucky the pay's decent."
"Finally," said Spider-man.
Logan slapped the flyer down on the counter.
"Find lost horse huh?" said Boksee looking it over. "That's a tough one. I thought you seemed like a boar slaying kind of guy myself."
"I am," grunted Logan.
Boksee pulled over another tome and after flipping through a few pages, scribbled down some info.
"Alright gentlemen, the quest has been added to your party queue. Return here when it's been completed for your payment."
Logan nodded.
"Will do," said Spider-man.
"Alright, let's get this over with," said Logan as they made their way out the door.
A few horses grazed contently in the fields surrounding a rustic stable.
"Thank you boys for coming out here so quickly," said the old stablemaster as he leaned on his cane. "If you don't mind me saying, you both look a bit old to be porcelain rank."
Spider-man crossed his arms.
"Actually, we do mind."
The three stood in a paddock of lush grass as a goat trotted by.
"Oh I…" stuttered the stablemaster.
"We ain't from around here but we'll get the job done. What happened?"
"Right," said the stablemaster recomposing himself. "Yes. So, yesterday morning I came to do the rounds with the horses when I found a fallen tree had taken down about a yard of fencing. Three of my horses had wandered out. I found two of 'em but my prize Bashkir mare is still missing. We combed the woods all yesterday but I wasn't able to find her. That's when I decided to put in a quest. The longer I waited, the worse chance there was of finding her."
"Mm," agreed Logan.
"She's a five-year-old mare, fifteen hands tall at the withers, with a chestnut coat," said the stablemaster.
"Smooth coat or curly?" asked Spider-man.
"Smooth."
Logan gave Spider-man a look.
"What? I know things."
"Her name is Butternut," continued the stablemaster with tears in his eyes.
"Butternut!" cried Spider-man excitedly.
"Butternut," agreed the stablemaster. "Please boys. Bring her home, won't you? She's such a good girl," he said beginning to sniffle.
Spider-man put a hand to his back.
"Of course. We'll do everything in our power," he said clenching a fist.
Logan groaned.
"Take us to her stable," he said annoyed.
The stablemaster nodded.
"So this was the last stall she was in," said the stablemaster opening the gate.
Logan stepped in and began to huff the air.
"Hmm… Do you have anything that only Butternut touched? Her own saddle, or reins? Blanket?"
"Well I…" said the stablemaster putting a hand to his chin in thought. "Oh!"
He shambled out and returned with a prize ribbon.
"How about this?" he said handing it to Logan.
Logan took it.
"So, are you two rangers? You have tracking experience?"
Logan shoved the ribbon in his face and took an enormous whiff.
"Uh, something like that," said Spider-man to the stablemaster's shocked face.
"Ahhhhhh…" exhaled Logan pulling it away. "Right."
Logan dropped to his hands and started sniffing the ground. Keeping his knees up and his face to the dirt, he started probing the yard trying to pick up the horse's scent.
"Blow me down! The man's a lycanthrope!"
"He's not a werewolf!" said Spider-man. "At least I don't think he is."
"I ain't a werewolf," called Logan several feet away. He stood.
"This where the fence was busted?" he asked at a length of fencing. It did look newer than what surrounded it with debris of branches scattering the area.
"That's correct," said the stablemaster as he and Spider-man walked up.
Logan nodded.
"Alright. Come on web head. We've got a horse to find," said Logan vaulting over the fence.
"Coming!" said Spider-man leaping over the same fence in a single jump.
"You boys need any rope or…" called the stablemaster surprised as they started into the woods.
"We're good!" called Spider-man before they disappeared from sight.
"What an odd pair," said the stablemaster.
The forest was the same warm hues and vibrant greens as before. This was the Nehfar forest apparently. Birds fluttered and fat, russet squirrels scampered in the high branches over head as the pair made their way through the mossy understory.
"I hope we find that horse soon. I am so hungry," said Spider-man.
"It probably would've been faster to just go kill some boars. We could've probably eat'n 'em afterwards too."
"I told you, I'm not killing woodland creatures. Ugh, and how much hiking are we gonna have to do today?"
"Stop complaining."
"Easy for you to say. You have shoes."
"Shut it and concentrate on scanning for tree monsters."
"Tree monsters…right," said Spider-man looking around at the endless horizon of tall, straight trees. "…Hags, goblins…"
He stopped to watch as a strange slender animal he didn't recognize tackled a squirrel and plunged its sharp teeth into the rodent's neck. The squirrel shrieked and flailed but in a moment it was limp. The slender animal then scuttled off with its prey hanging from its mouth.
"…What other kind of things do you think are out here?"
"Let's not find out," grunted Logan bluntly.
They continued forward for some time. Wolverine was silent and focused as he tracked the mare's earthy, musky scent. As before he would sniff the air to keep them going in the right direction. Every so often he'd put his face to the dirt or to a plant to smell more intently. Once they came across a pile of horse poop. Jackpot for a tracker. Spider-man wasn't as enthused.
In a dense thicket Logan came to an abrupt halt.
"Stop," he commanded throwing out a hand.
"What is it?"
"I smell death," he snarled. "Go high," he instructed.
Spider-man obeyed and leapt onto a tall branch. He quickly surveyed the area in sight.
"See anything?" called Logan.
"No!" called back Spider-man.
"Keep an eye out and stay close!"
"Got it!"
Logan turned his attention to the over powering scent of rot and started tracking it through the undergrowth. Silently, Spider-man followed in the trees above. He didn't make a crack or cause a falling twig. If Logan couldn't smell him, he might not have known he was there.
Buzzing flies started swarming. Logan slapped one that bit his face.
He pushed down a thick bramble of branches to reveal the remains of a dead animal on the forest floor. Although it was half missing, and rotted to the point of pelt, skeleton, and spilling maggots it was instantly recognizable.
It was a horse.
"Shit," mumbled Logan. "Spider-man!" he called.
"Yah?" he called back.
"I think our horse…"
He was cut off by a belligerent roar. It thundered through the woods shaking the trees. Birds fled in all directions. Squirrels dove out of sight. Even a slender animal abandoned a dead lizard in fear.
"What was that‽" cried Spider-man.
He leapt up through the canopy, vaulting up a particularly tall tree, until he broke through the forest roof. He popped his head out of the leaves and gasped.
It looked like an extremely squat man was stomping and smashing around in a nearby clearing, except the man was as tall as a building! It was dressed in nothing but a kilt of crudely harvested animal pelts and in its grip was a club the size of a telephone pole.
Even from here Spider-man could smell the stench of the creature on the wind like B.O. and rot, and could feel its massive thudding steps vibrating his tree. It's body and face were covered in brown stains. In a furious swing it sent its massive club crashing through a tree toppling it in a thunderous crack and an explosion of splinters.
"What is that thing‽" cried Spider-man. "Logan!" he called. "There's…"
He was cut off by the sound of a woman's cry echoing across the canopy. The noise sent adrenaline through him.
"Someone needs help!" he called out.
Without thinking, Spider-man took off swinging through the branches.
"Hey! Wait for…" called Logan.
But he was quickly out of ear shot.
In a mixture of running, leaping, and web swinging Spider-man sped through the branches as the roars and cries grew louder. Twigs sliced across his body. Leaves showered the forest floor below. Through the dense trees, the monstrous giant came into view. He could make out something metal and shining swerving around its feet.
It was the silver ranked adventurer!
Wielding an enormous shield and the biggest mace Spider-man had ever seen, she was sprinting in and out of the giant's reach desperately trying to catch an opening to land a blow. She found one. As the giant slammed its club into the dirt to the left she threw herself to the right. In a furious backhand swing she sent her mace careening into its ankle.
Blood splattered. The giant cried and swiped at her like a fly. The hit connected.
"No!" cried Spider-man.
Her shield took most of the blow but she was sent tumbling to the ground. Snarling in pain, she flipped around to see the giant rearing up over her. It raised its club high into the air to deliver a killing strike.
In terror she raised her shield.
Spider-man burst from the trees and exploded webbing onto the giant's face. It stumbled backwards in surprise as Spider-man landed on its collar.
The silver rank looked up in shock as the giant pawed at the thick webbing coating its eyes, nose and mouth.
"Get out of here!" cried Spider-man. The giant dropped its club as it tried to slap Spider-man off its chest.
The silver rank rose to her feet.
"Keep it distracted!" she commanded.
She charged at the monster and landed a hard hit into its shin. It kicked at her blindly but she dodged.
With a furious bellow the monster finally managed to scrape enough webbing from its face to see. It immediately slapped at Spider-man with true aim. Spider-man managed to dodge but just barely. He lost his footing and was forced to fall. With a cry he landed in a roll by the silver rank.
"Are you alright?" she exclaimed.
"I…"
The giant moved to smash them with its fist.
They both cowered.
In a flash of shining metal Wolverine dashed in front of them slicing an enormous red ribbon into the giant's hand. It shrieked and pulled its blood spewing limb through the air.
"Couldn't have fuck'n waited for me?" he barked at Spider-man.
"I've only got eighty years to live Logan!"
The silver rank pulled Spider-man to his feet and the three quickly regrouped.
"We have to fall it," she proclaimed.
She scanned them both at a rapid pace.
"You! How much more magical thread do you have?"
"Huh?" asked Spider-man. "Oh! I can go all day!"
"Excellent! Bind its legs! You'll have to move fast. Claws, you're with me!"
"Now you're talking tuts!"
The giant seemed to have found its second wind. It clenched its bloody fist and roared in fury.
"When he binds go behind. I'll take left you take right!" instructed the silver rank as the giant geared up to start its next barrage of attacks. "GO!"
Screaming and blubbering in blinding hatred the giant madly pounded at the ground trying to squash any of them. Spider-man sprinted to the side and shot a thick web line on its ankle. Using the web like a tether he dashed around the giant's legs at a ridiculous speed circling it. The giant was too distracted attacking his team mates for it to notice its binding legs until the webbing was finally thick enough to stand against the giant's strength.
"Now Claws!"
The silver rank and Wolverine both ran to either side of the giant meeting back up behind it. It tried to turn around to smash Logan but nearly lost its footing as it finally discovered the state of its legs. It reached down to snap the webbing as Spider-man continued to circle.
"Aim high! For the back of the knees!" shouted the silver rank.
Before it had a chance to free itself, the two attackers plunged and bludgeoned their weapons into the monster's defenseless ligaments. Blood rained down on them as the giant screamed and bellowed. With a thud that shook the earth it dropped to all fours. The group all had to dodge backwards.
Recovering quickly, the silver rank charged back towards the giant's legs to continue her assault.
Logan took his moment.
"Give me a boost!" he shouted.
Spider-man sprinted forward and dropped to his knees just in time for Wolverine to leap onto his back. Using Spider-man like a spring board he launched himself onto the giant.
Claws splayed to the sides, he sprinted up the giant's downed spine and plunged his blades into the back of its neck.
The giant shrieked in pain and terror. It convulsed and flailed and writhed and rolled but Logan's deep sunk claws held him fast.
It hadn't been a clean kill.
Baring his sharp teeth Wolverine slashed into the giant's nape again. His adamantium blades sliced through the flesh with ease but the giant continued to fight. Logan screamed in adrenaline and laid into the giant again and again. Blood splattered and rained.
Spider-man and the silver rank had both stopped fighting. They had retreated out of the radius of the flailing behemoth as Wolverine wrangled it in its death rolls.
Spider-man looked on in shock. He was too stunned to even make a move. He was helpless but to watch the dumb brute shriek as his team member slowly decapitated it.
The silver rank looked on in awe as the massive goliath was brought to heel by the other adventure's blades.
Finally, Wolverine felt his claws reverberate as they sliced into solid bone. His crimson-soaked face spread into a vicious grin as he reared back. In a final forceful slash, he plunged his blades through the massive vertebrae severing the spinal cord with a fleshy snap.
The giant went still.
Like the trees it had felled, the dead monster collapsed to the ground in a strange slow motion that rattled the woods. A leg twitched a few final times as it sunk into the dirt. Its eyes hung open. In an instant, everything became unnaturally calm and quiet.
Spider-man and the silver rank walked forward as Wolverine raised to his full height atop the giant's shoulders.
He was drenched in blood and panting. He sheathed his claws and leapt to the ground before them.
Spider-man stepped forward.
"I…"
"We did it!" cried the silver rank.
"Fuck yah we did!" cried Logan excitedly. "I haven't scrapped like that in decades!"
Logan punched at the silver ranks heavy armor and received a few in return in shared adrenaline fueled celebration.
"Did you have to kill it?" interrupted Spider-man.
"What‽" asked the silver rank like he had seven heads.
"Don't mind him," snarled Logan.
"Come on," said Spider-man on the cusp of anger. "You have to admit that was unnecessarily brutal," he said motioning to the corpse.
"It was either it or us! You kill it whatever way you can. Get over it!" scolded Logan shoving him.
"Hey!" barked the silver.
Spider-man took an angered breath but stepped away.
Logan shook his head and rolled his eyes but let it go.
Spider-man walked over to look down at the dead giant's twisted face.
"What was this thing anyway?" he asked.
"A hill giant," said the silver rank wiping off her blood drenched mace. "I had taken a quest to investigate a wandering monster in the Nehfar woods, but I would have never have thought it could have been a giant. They're unheard of in this region. At worse I thought it might be an owlbear."
"Lucky we were in the neighborhood," said Logan.
"Logan," scolded Spider-man.
"No, he's right," she said sheathing her weapon. "You two saved my life. I'm in your debt. Thank you."
Her long lavender hair blew gently in the breeze as she stood before the two men. Even dripping with blood, her immaculate armor glistened against her chest, and her face was the picture of nobility.
Spider-man put a hand behind his head.
"Well, hey," he said bashfully. "You know, it's what we- Hey! Is that our horse‽" he cried.
The group turned. Crudely tethered to a pile of the giant's plundered possessions a chestnut mare was fretfully trotting about.
"Well, how about that," said Logan.
"Butternut!"
Logan and Spider-man re-entered the pub.
The place was packed. Villagers of every make and model spilled out onto the dark lamp lit street.
Striding confidently to the front, Logan placed a copper coin on the bar.
"That was fast," said the barkeep. "So, you found work at the guild?"
He stopped and stared at the pairs' chests. They were both wearing new tags.
The barkeep did a double take.
"Steel‽" he barked surprised. "You two went up two ranks in one day‽"
Logan sneered a toothy, prideful grin.
"Yah, apparently being nominated by a silver rank carries serious clout," said Spider-man.
"We took down a hill giant," said Logan.
"Well blow me down."
He shoved Logan's coin back at him.
"The first drink's on me tonight fellas."
Logan almost gasped in happiness.
"Thanks," said Spider-man putting his hands up. "But I don't really drink."
Logan elbowed him in the gut.
"Ow! Logan come on!"
Warm torch light illuminated the crowded wooden tables as the small room struggled to contain its overflow of rowdy patrons.
At long last, a heaping rack of pork ribs was placed with a heavy thunk on the pair's corner of a table.
"Finally!" cried Spider-man.
Without so much as a quip, he snatched up a rib and dug his face into it.
"MMmmm…I didn't think I was going to make it," he mumbled in ecstasy.
"Well, you were certainly belly-ach'n enough to be on your way out" said Wolverine as he downed the last of his free mead.
He yanked his own rib from the rack and sunk his sharp teeth into the tender hot flesh.
His eyes went wide.
"Fuck! They got some good food here," he declared happily ripping off a huge bite. He looked over to Spider-man's side of the table where his untouched mead sat neglected.
He swallowed.
"Don't suppose you'll be need'n this," he said sliding the tankard to his side of the table. Spider-man was too deep in a rib to notice or care.
In short work, all that remained of their meal was the gnawed bones. Spider-man was still chewing on one.
"Fresh killed meat, home brewed booze. I could get use to this," said Logan satisfied.
Spider-man pulled the now spotless rib from his mouth. "Yah, don't get too comfortable," he said then looked around. "So… pork seems to be a big thing in this place," he commented noting the other parties' meals.
"Well, we are in Boar Bramble."
"There you two are!"
Spider-man and Logan both turned to see the silver rank shoving her way toward their table.
"Oh, hi," said Spider-man.
Squeezing and pushing through the crowd of patrons, she finally reached Spider-man's side of the long table.
"I realized earlier we were never properly introduced. I'm Arianwyn," she said formally extending a hand.
"Spider-man," said Spider-man taking it. "and this is Wolverine."
"The Spider-man and Wolverine. You two aren't from around here are you?"
"Nope," said Logan.
"May I join you?"
"Sure, this bench has room for another half a butt cheek," said Spider-man.
He slid to the edge of the table to give her enough room to squeeze onto the seat with him. He opted for the edge so he could throw a leg out.
"Listen," she said sitting. "I know this may be rather forward but I saw what you two could do out there. I would have ranked you higher if I were the evaluator," she said annoyed. "Regardless," she said recomposing herself. "I was wondering… would you like to form a party?"
Spider-man and even Wolverine looked surprised.
"Really?" asked Spider-man.
"Yes."
"You don't know shit about us," said Logan skeptically.
"I know you can kick ass. That's all I really need to know about you."
"Heh," said Logan with a grin.
"After I got back to town," she continued. "I did some research. A giant in this region is unheard of. Unprecedented even. If there was a giant in the Nehfar forest something has changed in the world, and as far as I'm concerned, when something changes, it's usually for the worst. Boar Bramble is going to need a strong party like ours."
"But if we did form a party, that would mean you'd have to accept only lower quests, right?" asked Spider-man. "We can only accept quests up to steel?"
"With skills like yours, I'm sure you two will climb the ranks quickly," she said confidently. "Besides, it might be smart to start off with easier quests while we figure out our party's dynamics. So, what say you?"
Spider-man leaned his face onto a hand.
"Protecting the town from the diabolical forces of evil? It's like I never even left home," he said tongue-and-cheek. "Sure, it'll at least give me someone to talk to that doesn't smell like old cheese."
"And how about you?" she asked turning to Wolverine.
Logan shrugged.
"What else was I gonna do here?"
Nearby, another party cheered as they threw their mugs together in an unrelated toast.
Night had fallen over the town some hours ago. After leaving the lively pub the rest of the village was quiet and empty. Everyone was either at the pub or already asleep.
Spider-man envied those people.
He and Wolverine made their way down the cobbled main street passing nothing but dark windows.
"So… she seemed nice," said Spider-man.
Logan grunted.
"I forgave her for being a jerk to us earlier. It must have just been an off moment. Maybe she was just having a bad day."
Logan gave him a skeptical eyebrow.
"At least we'll be able to take some higher paying quest now. Even with the free drinks that meal alone took about a third of our pay," said Spider-man pulling out a web sack of coins. "If we want to eat in the meantime, we've got to try to stretch this out. Lucky for you, I know a thing or two about milking pennies."
"I used to milk ha'pennies idiot."
The pair's long shadows walked in time beside them to the sound of their echoing, scuffing footsteps.
"And let me tell you what," continued Logan. "Those things, had some tiny little tits. You had your work cut out for you."
Spider-man laughed.
A bat swooped down and snatched a fluttering moth from the humid air.
"I can't believe it's only been a day," said Spider-man watching it. "It feels like we've already been here a week. You know, I don't even remember the last thing I did at home. I don't remember going to sleep or anything.
Logan grunted.
"I hope we find our way home," he continued.
"We will," said Logan. "We always do. Until then we play along. We survive."
"Right," said Spider-man.
The same bat flapped over to a building and landed on the underside of a roof. It curled its wings around itself as it munched on its capture.
"So… Wolvie," said Spider-man unsure. "Where are we going to sleep tonight?"
There was a long pause.
Logan grunted.
The End