A/N Chapters range from innocent silliness to oh-my-gawd-where's-the-eye-bleach? Some of them contain (explicit) adult content, so be prepared for anything. You have been warned!

I borrowed the Instant Transmission sound from Team Fourstar because it makes more sense in a written story than a bunch of random letters. Credit goes to them.

Without further ado, enjoy!

*Pop*

Goku lowered his fingers from his forehead and scanned his new surroundings. Wait a minute, this isn't –. A little confused, he frowned. He found himself in a crowded, dimly lit venue with loud music and colorful lighting. One side of the spacious room hosted several privacy booths, the other a luxurious bar area. The center was decorated with various tables and a wide open place to do what looked like some sort of dancing.

Goku desperately needed some advice on a very particular issue, so he decided to visit his friend who could help him out. His buddy's ki originated from this building, so the man should be here somewhere.

Scanning the crowd thoroughly, a strange feeling rose from his lower belly. The type of feeling that screamed, "Get out of here!" Most attendees were wearing clothes that didn't cover the parts that mattered while others were simply naked. Some people were drinking, others were engaging in activities that included exchanging bodily fluids in various creative ways. Goku took a closer look at the booths and scratched his cheek. I wonder what those are for?

A strapping man with a handsome face and weird spiky hair dressed in orange martial arts gi looked a little out of place, so it didn't take long for someone to notice the confused-looking stranger. "Hello there handsome, how can I help you?"

Goku turned around and saw that he was greeted by a blonde, young woman dressed as a… bunny?, smiling at him suggestively. He tilted his head. Hmm, she reminds me of Bulma, but I'm not sure why. Chuckling awkwardly, Goku smiled back. "Hi there, I hope so! I'm a little lost here ya see."

The woman looked him up and down. He's hot, but his choice of costume is totally weird. "You don't look like you come here often. Are you here to swing with your partner or are you ridin' solo?"

Swing? Glancing around once more, Goku failed to spot any swings. Huh? Did I miss something? He shrugged it off. Oh well, she looks friendly, so she'll probably help me if I ask nicely. "Uhm, I'm looking for my friend. Can ya help me find him, please? I sensed his energy signal here, but I don't see him anywhere."

"Your friend? A guy?" Shame.

"Yep! My friend! Can ya help me?"

"That depends. Who is your 'friend'?"

"Yamcha!"

The waitress cocked an eyebrow. "Yamcha? You mean the famous baseball player?"

The warrior's face lit up. "Yep! That's the one! Is he here?"

"I'm sorry, mister, but most people prefer it if their friends don't know they're here."

Goku frowned. "Why not?"

Pointing at the floor, she answered hesitantly. "This is a swingers club, sir."

Goku rubbed his chin. The swings must be in those little rooms. "Well, if ya won't help me, I'll go look for him myself." Turning on his heel, he headed for the booths.

"WAIT MISTER!" She panicked. "You can't just go and enter the privacy booths!"

Goku turned back to the bunny lady. "Why not? How do I find Yamcha then?" He clawed the air, hoping to convince her of the urgency of the situation. "Look, I'm in a lot of trouble! I'm gonna play a battle of 'baseball' with the gods next week, and I need Yamcha to teach me the basics. I have to win that fight!"

WHAT!? Lost for words, the woman gaped at Goku. Baseball with the gods? What is he on? He doesn't look drunk!

Seeing that he wasn't getting any directions and feeling a strong urge to leave this place as soon as possible, Goku gave her a thumbs up. "I'll be careful not to disturb the swinging people." He waved at her and continued his journey toward the booths. Heeding the woman's warning, he kept some distance as he scanned the ki signals behind the first door. Nope, no Yamcha here. On to the next one…

Five doors down, Goku grinned. Gotcha! He cheerfully opened the door to greet his buddy.

"GOKU!? What the hell, man!?" A wide-eyed Yamcha shouted.

"Fuck, dude! Even heard of knocking!?" A startled man yelled at the saiyan while the woman kneeling on the floor let out a high-pitched shriek.

Slightly unsettled, Goku gaped the scene in front of him. Yamcha was dressed in just an opened button-up shirt and his pubes, which were neatly shaved in the shape of an arrow pointing downwards. The unknown man did wear pants but had his fly unzipped and his bits out. Goku was unfamiliar with the woman's garments, but they resembled black duct tape covering only the essentials. Unable to make sense of the situation, he decided to ignore it entirely and get straight to business. "Hi Yamcha, glad I found ya! Look, man, I really need your help." Putting his palms together in front of his forehead, he humbly hunched over. "I need ya to tell me about –"

"GET OUT!" The trio yelled in unison.

Bewildered, Goku put his hands up. "Sheesh! Ok, I'll go wait outside." He gave a nervous laugh and began walking backward through the still-open door.

Yamcha groaned dramatically, looking a little shocked but mostly unimpressed. "Goku, I'll drop by your place tomorrow. Just get away from here, would you, dude?"

Goku put two fingers to his forehead and nodded at his friend. "Sure thing! Thanks, Yamcha. I'll be waitin'!" Smiling in victory, he *pop* vanished.

The man and woman gawked at the space Goku magically disappeared from. Did that man just vanish!?

Yamcha sighed. "That's Goku for you. Strongest dude in the universe, but dense as a rock. Don't worry, though. He's cool, he won't talk."

The duo shifted their gaze to Yamcha, blinking at the athlete in disbelief. What the hell just happened?