"Hi, darling," came my mom's voice from the other end of the phone.

"Hey, Mom," I said as I laid down on my bed.

"How has your week been?" she said.

"It's been okay. I had my intake session yesterday."

"And how did it go?"

"It was really good. The therapist has had a lot of experience and she seems really nice," I said.

"So long as it helps you, Max. That's all we need to hear," came Dad's voice. "We'll make sure you have enough money to pay her each week, if you're running low just tell us, okay?"

"I know. I'm sorry you have to fork out for it-"

"Maxine," came Mom's voice. "Don't you dare think like that. There's nothing more important to us than your happiness and well being."

I sighed.

"I know. I know. Thank you, I do appreciate it, I promise."

"We know you do," said Dad. "We'll be seeing you soon and we can't wait. Your mother has been getting your room together exactly as you remember it."

"I can't wait to see you again, darling!" said Mom.

I smiled.

"Yeah, I can't wait either. I really need a break right now."

"I know, darling," said Mom. "You deserve the chance to relax after everything."

"Well I've still got one more week first. We've got a new photography teacher starting tomorrow. We're not having a winter final for Photography or English with how behind we are on the curriculum."

"I'm still not happy with how they've handled this. With the money behind Blackwell they should have been more prepared."

"Honey," said Dad. "It's a complicated situation all around. I'm sure they've done the best they can."

"It's okay, Mom," I said as I sat on the edge of me bed. "Yeah it's…not exactly how I thought my education at Blackwell would be but what's happened has happened. I just gotta deal with it and go forward."

I heard my Mom sigh.

"How are you going about the photography classes now?" she said.

"I still feel uneasy being in the room. And obviously the practical stuff I still can't do…but I guess it's up to the teacher, whoever they are."

"If they're not understanding then you make sure you go to the Principal, okay?"

"I will, Mom. I promise," I said.

"How's the rest of your week looking besides school, got anything fun planned?" said Dad.

"The girls in my dorm are having a secret Santa at the end of the week," I said. "I got Kate's name, so I got a new set of art coloured pencils as she loves do doodle."

"Aw that sound lovely," said Mom. "I'm sure she'll love it."

"Yeah, I hope so. I haven't gotten you both anything yet. I'm sorry, I've been so distracted but I will-"

"Sweetheart," said Mom. "It doesn't matter, you don't need to worry about getting us anything, okay?"

"No, Mom you both deserve something special, I-"

"Your mother's right, Max," said Dad. "We don't want you worrying about that this year."

"And having our daughter back home for Christmas is already special," said Mom.

I smiled at my mom's words.

"Okay. Okay, if you'll stop embarrassing me then I'll just get you a card."

I heard my dad chuckle. "Told you it always works," he said to my mom.

"Oh don't be silly," she said. "I'm not trying to embarrass you, sweetheart," she said to me.

"I know, Mom. But if that's the case then I don't want you getting me anything either."

"Maxine…"

"You're paying for my therapy and you gave me so much money for my birthday. So I don't want anything else right now, okay?"

There was a pause.

"Promise?" I said as I stood up.

"Okay, sweetheart," said Mom. "We won't get you anything."

"Thank you," I said.

I heard a small knock at the door. I looked up to see Joyce peering in. I pressed the phone to my shoulder.

"Max," said Joyce. "Sorry to interrupt, but dinner will be ready soon."

"Okay, Joyce," I said. She smiled and disappeared out of view, I heard her footsteps descending the stairs.

"Mom, dad?" I said into the phone. "I have to go but I'll see you both in a week."

"Okay, sweetheart," said Mom. "But you text or call us-"

"If I need to, yeah I know, Mom," I said with a chuckle.

"It'll be even worse when you come home, Max, believe me," said Dad.

"Oh you always have to have the last word," said Mom.

I laughed. "Love you both," I said.

"We love you too," they said together. "Bye!"

"Bye!" I hung up the phone.

I ate dinner with David and Joyce.

"Are your parents okay, Max?" said Joyce.

"Yeah, they're okay. Worrying, as usual," I said.

David chuckled. "It means they care. Don't go taking it for granted," he said.

"I know, David. I just…wish they didn't need to worry so much. Hopefully Doctor Howder will make things easier."

"Now remember what I said, Max. If she ain't helping you then you-"

"Find someone who will. I know, David."

Joyce chuckled. "Now who's worrying too much?"

"It's because he cares," I said. David smiled at me.

"They told me not to worry about getting them a gift for Christmas," I said. "And I won't but I feel bad."

"Oh, Max," said Joyce. "You can still celebrate with them, gift or no gift. Speaking of, you don't have to get David or I anything either."

"Joyce…"

"No arguing," said David. "Joyce and I decided you don't need to worry about nothing like that."

"Okay, fine," I said.

I looked over at the Christmas tree. I noticed a decoration at the top I hadn't before. CHECK GAME

"That's a nice decoration," I said.

"Thank you, Max," said Joyce. "Chloe made it."

RIIIIIIINGG!

I closed my math text books and sighed.

Final class of the day in a room I don't want to be in…with someone I know hardly anything about.

I put my things away and left the room. I went to my locker to collect my thoughts an try to calm down. I felt a hand on my shoulder which made me jump. I turned round to see Kate.

"Max," she said. "I'm so sorry I didn't mean to scare you."

"No, I'm sorry," I said putting my hand on my forehead. "Was just…worrying..."

"Oh, Max. I'm sure it'll be okay. I'll be right there with you."

Kate gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze as we turned towards the direction of the classroom. I let out another deep breath. We reached the doorway and I looked inside. There she was stood at her desk, folding pieces of paper in half. She had grey hair and was dressed in a smart woman's suit. She looked up and made eye contact with me. I stayed motionless. She smiled at me and beckoned me forward.

"Come on in, don't be shy," she said.

I stepped inside with Kate behind me. I went and sat at the table with Kate by the window. Victoria, Taylor, Stella, Alyssa, Daniel and Hayden had already sat down. In the same seats as they used to before. I looked up at the board where the teacher had written her name: Mrs. Reigtine.

RIIIIIINNNG!

The bell rang to signal the start of class. I looked across at Victoria, who gave me a small smile and a nod. Miss Reigtine moved to the front of her desk and leaned back against it. She clapped her hands together.

"Okay," she said. "I feel if you're going to mention the elephant in the room then it should be done as quickly as possible…"

I shuffled in my seat and clasped my hands together on my desk.

"I am aware some of you were attracted to Blackwell Academy based on your previous photography teacher and his illustrious career…"

I glanced at Victoria, who was scowling at Mrs. Reigtine. As if she was personally attacking Victoria.

"You didn't come here for me. I get that. I'm sure everyone's idea of what Blackwell would be like has been somewhat turned upside down with recent events. I understand even two months after the fact you may still be feeling the fallout of it all. I've been advised by Principal Keaton to remind you of the counselling services that this school provides. It's all confidential so please do go speak to someone if you need to."

She glanced at me, which made my eyes look at the table.

"Now, even without what transpired, you have all lost out on two months of education in the theory side of photography. You have lost the momentum you may have had in picking up the finer points of photography. As I'm sure you're aware, you've had your Winter final cancelled and will instead have everything in the second semester final."

Victoria scoffed. Mrs. Reigtine looked in her direction.

"Is there something you wanted to say?"

Victoria shook her head.

"Because if you wanted to say that an entire year's worth of work being encompassed in one theory and one practical exam at the end of the year is unfair and expecting an awful lot from you all then I would have to say…that I agree."

Victoria's eyebrows raised as Mrs. Reigtine addressed us all again.

"As I was saying, you have an awful lot working against you. It might feel like like no-one wants you to succeed. But Blackwell does. And I do. Even…disruptions such what you have all experienced don't dampen one thing…your talent. Whatever talent you had two months ago, you still have that now. It is my job to build upon that and give you the knowledge you need make full use of the talent you possess. I will work with you, if you are willing to work with me. Does that sound fair?"

Silence.

"Does that sound fair?" she repeated.

"Yes," everyone except me said.

"Good, because it would his an awful lot more difficult had you said no. The school schedule is not our friend right now. There's only a week before you go off to enjoy your Christmas break so there's little point in picking up exactly where you left off. This week, to try and help get you back on track I plan on doing a quick crash course on what you have been taught in the first few weeks up until your education was disrupted. So time is short, but I am happy to answer any questions up front. Does anyone have any?"

There was a silence again. I couldn't stand the nothingness so I said the most stupid question that popped into your head.

"How do you pronounce your name?"

She chuckled.

"Many have asked that. You can all call me Mrs. Ray-Tine. You can thank my German ancestors for it. Speaking of names…"

She went to her desk and picked up the pieces of folded up paper.

"…If you could all pretend you're in kindergarten and write your full names on these and stand them up. I need all the help I can get in learning who you are. She handed a piece of paper out to everyone. She came to the desk Kate and I were at. She put the pieces of paper on the desk in front of us. I could see a second piece sticking out. I opened up the paper and saw something Miss Reigtine has written:

If you need to step out of the class at any point, please do so. You don't need to ask.

I glanced up as she returned to her desk and faced us all. She gave me a small smile as I grabbed a pen and wrote my name. I slid the other piece of paper under my textbook and placed my name card to face her. She looked around and quickly reeled them off.

"Daniel, Hayden, Stella, Taylor, Alyssa, Victoria, Courtney, Max and Kate. Wonderful. Any more questions?"

"What's your photography background?" said Victoria.

"I worked mainly in nature photography, but I have dabbled in a variety over the decades. I was a teacher at Washington College for a number of years before I moved to Arcadia Bay in my retirement."

"Why are you here if you're retired?" said Taylor.

Mrs. Reigtine paused.

"It's not something I planned on, but this school was an exception. What transpired is something that could give anyone a very unpleasant view of what photography truly is. At it's core, it's a way to show every facet of the world. The idea that any one of you, will potentially leave this school and not pursue the path you might be most passionate about, that your talents may not be used all because of something that was wildly out of your control upsets me greatly. So I will make sure that those wish to pursue photography beyond this school ground can and will. Any more questions up front?"

Silence from everyone. Mrs. Reigtine clapped her hands together.

"Well if you do, you're welcome to ask me after class. Right now, let's get to work and start right back at the beginning. What was the name of the technique that created the world's first photograph?"

Several hands went up.

"...Which is the contrast of light and dark," said Victoria.

"Excellent," said Mrs. Reigtine. She looked around at all of us. "I'm very impressed with what you've all retained. We'll go over the rest of the key areas in the other LOP classes. For Wednesday's class, I'd like you to bring in photo's that show who you are as a photographer. What subjects you like, what techniques etc. So I can get to know you all on an artistic level."

RIIIIINNNNNG!

"Well, that's the end. Thank you everyone for being on-board with all of this. I shall see you tomorrow."

I packed my stuff away and stood up.

"Kate and Max, please can you stay behind for a few minutes. The rest of you can go."

I looked at Kate, who looked at me back, just as confused. I saw Victoria looking at us. She picked up her bag and gave us a nod before leaving the classroom with everyone else. Kate and I approached Mrs. Reigtine at her desk.

"Daniel, can you close the door on your way out please?"

Daniel looked over his shoulder at us before tentatively closing the door behind him. Mrs. Reigtine interlocked her fingers as she looked up at Kate and I.

"I was made aware of what you've both been through in the past two months. I just wanted to check how you were both doing," she said.

Kate and I looked at each other.

"That's really kind of you, Mrs. Reigtine," said Kate.

"Yeah, thanks," I added.

She nodded. "How are the both of you doing in regards to photography? Kate, I know you spent some time away from the classroom."

"Yes. Being in this room was difficult for me for a while. But I'm okay now."

"How about taking pictures?"

"I can do it. I'm a little rusty but I've been trying more recently to find my feet."

"That's good," said Mrs. Reigtine. "And how about you, Max?"

I looked down at the floor and grabbed my arm, awkwardly rubbing my fingers on it. I felt Kate's hand on my shoulder.

"Kate, you can go. I'd like to speak to Max alone. If that's okay with you, Max?"

"No," I said quickly. "She can stay."

I kept my eyes on the floor as Kate rubbed my shoulder again. There was a brief silence.

"Very well," said Mrs. Reigtine. "How are you with taking photographs right now, Max?"

"I can't," I said. "At all."

"Okay, I understand. I'm willing to make concessions where they are needed."

"Thank you," said Kate. "We really appreciate that."

"Yeah," I said.

"It's no problem. I'll see you both tomorrow. Have a good rest of your day," said Mrs. Reigtine

I glanced at her again as Kate and I left the room.

I shut the door as Kate and I went into the hall.

"Are you okay, Max?" said Kate.

"Yeah. Yeah I'm good. You?"

She nodded.

"She seems nice," said Kate.

I looked back at the closed door.

"Let's get going," I said.

I shot out of bed as I woke up from yet another nightmare. I sat on the edge of my bed and clasped my hands together. I thought of my mom telling me to take deep breaths. I took a deep breath in and let out a shuddering exhale. I kept going until my hands and breathing were controlled. I slumped and put my head in my hands.

At least you're not being sick as much any more, Max. It's something.

I slumped back into bed and pulled the covers over me.

After English class, I went to the Photography class room. I peered round round to see Mrs. Reigtine sat at her desk looking through several pieces of paper. I retreated out of sight and went to my locker. I opened it up and looked at the photos on the inside of my door. I waited for a few minutes until others showed up. Stella and Alyssa approached me.

"Hey Max," said Alyssa.

"Hey guys," I said. I glanced at the room again.

"Everything okay, Max?" said Stella.

"Yeah," I said as I shut my locker door. "I'm fine."

RIIIINNNNG!

I got through the photography class okay. Mrs. Reigtine covered more old ground while I just waited for it to be over.

I got through the rest of the school day before heading to the library to study with Warren. I looked over some previous homework before he showed up and sat down next to me.

"Hey, Max," he said opening up his bag.

"Hey, Warren. Thanks for coming again."

"Don't gotta thank me. Anything for you. And I'm always happy to spread the wonders of science."

I chuckled.

"Spread it like a disease you mean? I've love to be infected with some passion for science but it's not working so far."

"Well, there's still time, Max," he said. "Where do you want to start?"

One study session later, and I still wasn't infected. But I was understanding everything pretty well.

"Thanks again, Warren," I said as I packed my stuff away.

"Hey, it's cool. Last one before Christmas."

"Yeah, hope my brain doesn't leak and lose all the info over winter break."

"Nah, you're doing good, Max. You got it."

"Speaking of Christmas, you got anything special for Brooke?"

"Oh, um…Yeah, I guess I should get her something…"

"I mean yeah, she's your girlfriend right? Is everything okay?" I said.

Warren paused, then continued putting his stuff in his bag.

"Yeah, it's fine…" he said.

"Warren," I said. He stopped moving and looked at me. "What's up? Is everything okay between you and Brooke?"

Warren was silent, I could tell from his face he felt uneasy.

"You can talk to me, Warren. It stays between us, I promise."

Warren sighed.

"It's…I don't know what to do, Max," he said.

"Well, what's the problem?"

"I don't…I like Brooke. I do…but I don't think I really…like her like her."

"What are you talking about? I thought you were both…Oh man."

"I tried, Max. I really did. We do have a lot in common but I just…I don't know I just don't see her that way."

I sighed.

"Well, have you spoken to her about this?"

He shook his head.

"You need to. The sooner the better."

"I don't know how, Max. I've never had to break up with somebody before," he said.

"Neither have I," I said. "But I do know what it's like to talk to someone when I don't have feelings for them."

Warren looked at me.

"It's not easy but these conversations have to happen," I said.

"Right before Christmas?"

"It sucks I know, but if you let it go on until after the holidays it'll be even worse. Talk to her about this before we all go away for the holidays."

Warren nodded with uncertainty.

"Warren…" I said. "…do you still have feelings for…" I trailed off.

He looked at me.

"No. Nah, nothing like that. I got past it all, I promise. I just thought I should give Brooke a chance since we have so much in common. But I just don't…"

"I get it, Warren. Talk to her, okay? I'll be here if you need me afterwards, okay?"

He nodded. "Thanks, Max."

Wednesday evening, I was in Stella's room with her and Courtney studying Algebra.

"So Max, what do you think of the new photography teacher?" said Stella.

"She's...I don't know. She seems okay but I whatever. Have you guys got your secret Santa gifts ready?" I said trying to change the subject.

"I am so ready," said Courtney. "I think I know my person well enough."

"Yeah, I think so too," said Stella.

"Good, me too. Can't wait to see what everyone's brought."

"Oh did you guys get a drawing from Daniel?" said Courtney.

"Drawing?" I said.

"Yeah, he gave me this awesome drawing he did of me. When I asked he said he was doing one for everyone?"

"Oh, well I haven't had one," said Stella.

"Yeah, me neither," I said.

"Oh, weird," said Courtney.

"Alright, we're getting distracted," said Stella. "Back to the numbers."

I sat in Language of Photography listening to Mrs. Reigtine.

"Now, of course we come to one of the most relevant pieces of photography history. One that has survived to modern day, commonly known now as the selfie."

I tensed up, thinking of what was coming.

"Now it's common for people to criticise those that take selfies and yet they likely wouldn't do the same to the royalty and rich folk who could afford a painting done of themselves. But the 'selfie' started with self portraits, who can tell me the name of the process that gave birth to the first self portraits?"

"The Daguerreian process."

"Very good, Victoria," I heard Jefferson's voice say. I stared at Mrs Reigtine. I saw her mouth moving, but all I heard was Jefferson's voice.

"The Daguerreian Process brought out the fine detail in people's faces…"

My heart sped up. My breathing began to become more heavy, my shoulders started rising and falling with each breath.

"...The first American daguerreotype-"

I stood up quickly, my chair scraping across the floor.

"-the faces were-" Mrs. Reigtine stopped suddenly as I walked quickly across the room towards the door. I felt every pair of eyes in the room staring at me. I heard Mrs. Reigtine snap her fingers.

"Eyes on me please, thank you!"

I went out into the hall. I rubbed my shoulders as I paced back and fourth. I tried to tread lightly so no one could hear what I was doing. I heard Mrs. Reigtine's voice continuing on in the background but none of it sounded like words to me. I worked to steady my breathing and slowly ran my hands up and down my arms in time with my breathing. As I started to calm down, Mrs. Reigtine came out of the classroom and approached me. I turned to face the other way when I saw her. I looked down at the floor as her feet came into view next to me.

"Has this happened before?" she said.

I nodded. "It's going away," I said. "I'm okay." I lowered my arms and looked up at her. She went to put her hand on my shoulder but I pulled away.

"Don't," I said.

"Do you need to go to the nurse?"

I shook my head. "No, I'm okay. Just…that stuff, the Daguerreian process stuff was something…he taught us the day…"

Mrs. Reigtine nodded. "I understand. There's only a minute or two left, I'm happy for you leave with your things if you want to."

"No! No I can stick it out."

"Are you sure?"

I walked past her and back into the classroom. There was a silence as I sat back down. I glanced over at Kate, who looked concerned. After a moment Mrs. Reigtine reentered the room.

"Okay," she said as she clapped her hands together. "I think that's everything I wanted to go through this week. I very much appreciate you all getting on board so quickly. I want all of you to take lots of photos over the holidays, even if they're not good, I don't care. Show me who you are as artists."

RIIIIIIINNGGG!

"That's a wrap, have a wonderful holiday. Rest up and get ready for the real work when you come back."

Everyone packed their things up and left. As soon as I was out of the room, Kate turned to me.

"Are you okay?" she said.

"Yeah, I'm okay. I won't need to be in there for a while anyway."

"I know. Just one more day and we can look forward to Christmas."

"Yeah, I can't wait," I said.

Victoria approached us.

"Everything okay?" she said.

"Can everyone just-" I clenched my fists. "I'm fine."

We all walked down the hall in stony silence.

Friday's classes went by and as I heard that final bell ring I breathed a sight of relief.

I know I've got so much work ahead before finals next month. But at least I can get some time to relax a little.

BZZT!

I checked my phone and saw a text from Dana.

You're up!

I chuckled as I out my phone away. I grabbed my wrapped up gift for Kate and left my room. I walked through the corridor, through the doors and saw Dana stood outside the door to the TV lounge. She quickly whipped her head away as I came into view.

"Behind your back, Max!" she said covering her eyes with her hand. I laughed and put my gift behind my pick.

"Understood, General Ward," I said.

"Actually, Max, I'm being very reasonable," she said, with a hint of a smile. "Put your gift inside the bag, then return to your room until everything is ready.

"Okay, got it."

I stepped into the TV lounge and saw the white bag on the ground. I was temped to peek inside the bag to see what gift Dana had put, but didn't want to risk her wrath, so I just reached in and put my gift inside. I left the room and went back to my room.

A short while later I got a new text.

Assemble!

As I left my room, I saw Victoria leaving hers. We smiled at each other. Everyone else's doors opened, I saw Alyssa and Courtney come for the doors to my right.

"Ready to get this over with?" said Victoria.

"Hey, don't be mean," I said. "It's fun."

"It's less fun when it's being run like a military operation."

"We should have invited Mr. Madsen," I said as we both laughed.

We all met up in the dorm lounge. Dana was stood near the tree, bouncing with excitement as we all sat down on the couches. Dana clapped her hands together.

"Okay everyone, we all made it through class and can relax and enjoy the holidays."

Everyone clapped.

"I was thinking we could do Secret Santa first and then the movie, everybody cool with that?"

"Do we actually get a say or have you decided everything already?" said Alyssa.

Everyone laughed.

"I have decided," said Dana. "But I am also open to ideas," she chuckled.

"I guess anyone who's disappointed with their gift and can wash it down with a good movie," said Brooke.

"That's the spirit. Well, not really, but sorta," said Dana.

Everyone chuckled again.

"Anybody want to do something else first?" said Dana.

Everyone shrugged. Except me.

"Yes," I said. "Can I say something first please?"

Dana and everybody else looked at me.

"Sure, Max. The floor's yours," she said gesturing to where she stood. I got up off the couch as Dana sat down in my seat. I turned to face everyone, my mouth immediately went dry as I saw all the eyes looking back at me.

"I just er…I needed to say something to all of you. Shit, I'm not really good as this so…"

"Max," said Dana. "It's okay. You've already told me, and you know everyone else will be cool about it."

"What?" I said. "Oh! Oh, Dana no- that's not what I was going to say."

Dana's eyes widened.

"Oh, shit. Sorry," she said.

"What's up?" said Stella.

"Oh, nothing. It's er…okay I didn't really plan on saying this but…I'm bisexual, that cool?"

I looked around at everyone, a mixture of shrugs and nods. Except for Dana, who was sinking further and further into her seat, seemingly hoping for it to swallow her whole.

"Dana," I said. She looked up at me with a panicked look. "It's okay. Really," I said with a smile. She nodded and sat back up.

"So, what did you want to say?" she said.

I looked back at all the expectant eyes again.

"I know what you've all been doing," I said. "To try and help me, I mean."

People started looking at each other.

"I know you've been taking turns staying up in case I have an episode."

"How do you know?" said Kate.

"Someone told me, I had them backed into a corner so please don't blame them. I just wanted to say how much I appreciate you. All of you, for wanting to help me. I know I'm as close with some of you as I am with other people, but it means a lot to me that you're all willing to help. I know how tough it is staying up all night and I'm truly sorry if it's affected you at school the next day or anything like that. So it's only fair…that you all know the reason why you're having to do it."

People glanced at each other again. I looked at Kate who smiled back at me. She nodded at me.

"There's another reason why I've been having nightmares and struggling to sleep. You probably think it's because of what happened in the bathroom with Chloe…but it's not."

I could feel the tension in the room. Everyone seemed to be bracing themselves.

"What happened to Kate and all those girls with Mark Jefferson…it happened to me too."

I looked at the floor. I couldn't bear to make eye contact with anyone. After a few moments of horrible silence, I saw Victoria quickly get to her feet. I looked up at her. I could see her fists were down at her sides, shaking. Her face looked so furious. She started to move toward me. I took a half step back as she reached and she…threw her arms around me. She pulled me in close to her as I put my hands on her back. I started sobbing as I hugged her tighter and buried my face in her shoulder. I felt another pair of arms wrap around us which pulled us in closer. Then someone else joined us. Eventually I could feel everyone in the room involved. They all separated and wiped my eyes as I looked at everybody. Victoria was crying too. Dana had tears down her face as she wiped her eyes and covered her mouth. Everyone else looked a mixture of worried and concerned.

"Thank you," I said. "Thank you, guys."

"Fuck" said Dana. "Max, that's so awful."

"On top of…Chloe too," said Stella. "I don't even..."

"Yeah. It is what it is," I said. "I've started seeing a therapist and I'm hoping I can get better. You don't need to treat me like I'm made of glass or anything. I still want to do shit like Secret Santas and movie nights. Just know that sometimes I'm gonna freak out."

"We're all here for you. Right girls?" said Dana.

Everyone expressed agreement.

"Thank you," I said wiping my eyes one more time. "Sorry to ruin the mess up the night of order, Dana."

She just laughed and wiped her eyes.

"Oh, who gives a shit. If you wanna not do this we'd understand," she said.

"No, no I need this tonight. I'm okay. Let's get to the presents."

Everyone sat back down, with Dana sat on the arm of the couch next to the bag of gifts.

"Okay, everyone remember don't give away who got the gift. It's called Secret Santa for a reason. Alright, up first…"

Dana reached in an pulled out a gift.

"...is Brooke." Dana handed her the gift.

"Thanks," said Brooke as she turned it over in her hand. I quickly looked around to see if I could tell who the Secret Santa was. Everyone's poker faces were surprisingly strong. I looked back as Brooke unwrapped the gift. She took out some sort of belt with various holders and a fanny pack on the front.

"Is this a running belt?" she said. "I mean I don't run but I guess it could keep my phone in it."

"Well, yeah I was thinking-"

We all turned to look at Courtney, who immediately shut her mouth.

"Oh for crying out loud…"said Dana. Everyone burst out laughing. Poor Courtney went red with embarrassment.

"Is it really so hard to keep it a secret?" said Dana.

"Sorry, Dana. And sorry Brooke, I was thinking it would work for keeping all your tech stuff in, it was kinda the closest thing I could find," she said.

"Hey, it's cool," said Brooke. "And I could probably find a use for it. Put something heavy in it and use it as a weapon." Brooke swung the belt around in the air like a helicopter blade.

"Er, so long as you're happy?" said Courtney as Brooke laughed.

"Alright, next up…Stella."

Dana handed he a square shaped gift that was really thin. Stella unwrapped it and there was a rattling sound. She slid the paper off an revealed an abacus.

"How retro," said Stella, tipping the balls back and fourth.

"Yeah," said Alyssa. "You love math so I thought- Crap!"

"Oh my God you guy are killing me!" Dana screamed as she put her head in her hands. Everyone erupted into laughter. I sat back on the couch and put my hands on my stomach and laughed harder than I had in a long time. I could see Juliet playfully rubbing Dana's back to comfort her. Dana looked up with a smile and just shook her head.

"Okay well I guess the…Max, you okay?" she said suddenly. She had mistaken the tears I was wiping away for sadness. The truth was I was laughing so damn hard I was crying. Dana realised and just laughed with me.

"Okay forget the secret part," said Dana. "Just forget it. The Secret Santa is supposed to be sacred but forget it."

"I don't think anything sacred has a $20 limit, Dana," said Victoria.

"Yeah, okay. Point made," she said.

"Well, thank you Alyssa," said Stella.

"And if you're trapped on a desert island you've still got a way to count," said Alyssa.

"Because I'd bring this with me, okay if you say so…" said Stella as she and Alyssa laughed. Dana reached into the bag and pulled out another gift.

"This one's me!" said Dana. A very long and thin gift. "Okay, fuck it. Who's it from?"

"That's me," said Juliet.

"Aw no way! What is it?"

"Well open and find out, duh," said Juliet.

"Okay, okay."

Dana tore off the paper. She held two twirling batons.

"Oh sweet!" she said. "I've always wanted to try these." She tried to twirl them in her fingers but dropped them.

"Okay, I need to practice but thank you, Juliet!" Dana hugged her.

"It's cool, thought you'd like them," said Juliet. Dana reached into the bag again."

"Kate," said Dana. I tensed up a little as Kate stood up as Dana reached over to hand my gift to her.

"This is from me," I said as Kate sat back down.

"Oh thank you, Max."

"Don't thank me yet, you haven't seen it yet," I said.

"Oh don't be silly," she said. She unwrapped it. I braced myself, having one last second flash of doubt that I'd actually done something right. That disappeared when I saw her eyes light up.

"Oh my goodness, Max! This is so beautiful," she said as she turned my gift over. A tin of Black Widow wax coloured pencils.

"Yeah, I know draw, so I hoped these would be useful," I said.

"They will," said Kate. "I can't wait to use them. Thank you, Max."

I smiled as Kate kept the tin on her lap.

"Go, Max," said Dana. "Not that this is a competition but if it was you would be winning."

"And I'd be losing," Courtney said sheepishly to laughter.

"Hey, it's cool," said Brooke. "Fashion and stuff is your strong suit anyway."

"Aw, thanks Brooke. Maybe I can take give you some tips some time?"

Brooke tilted her head back and fourth, not exactly enthused. Dana broke the awkward silence.

"Okay, well anyway, next up-"

Everyone burst into laughter again. I saw Brooke and Courtney looking at each other as they laughed.

"Okay, we got…Taylor!"

"Woo," said Taylor as she grabbed the gift from Dana. It looked quite flat and square, looked like clothes to me.

"Who's this from?" said Taylor.

Brooke raised her hand before letting it fall back down.

"I think I nailed it, to be honest."

"Confidence," said Dana. "I like it."

Taylor opened the gift and revealed a blue shirt, with a weird shimmer.

"What the hell?" said Taylor. She held it up to show us.

"Rub your hand down it," said Brooke, doing the same to her Christmas jumper.

Taylor laid the shirt over her chest and rubbed a hand down it. The blue became a trail of purple behind Taylor's hand.

"Whoa, awesome!" said Taylor. "That is so cool. Thanks, Brooke."

"Hey, it's cool. Glad you like it," said Brooke.

"Can see why you don't need my help," said Courtney. "You're quite the fashionista already."

Brooke went a little red as we all chuckled. Dana reached into the bag again.

"Juliet!"

Dana handed the gift to her, she eagerly unwrapped it. She oohed at a leather notepad.

"That's from me," said Kate."

"Awesome, this is exactly what ace reporter Juliet Watson needs," she said. She took out the pen fastened at the top and flipped open the notepad in style. We all chuckled.

"Thanks, Kate," said Juliet.

"You're welcome," said Kate.

Dana grabbed another gift for…

"Courtney!"

The gift was real small, it fit in the palm of Dana's hand as she gave it to her.

"This is from me," said Taylor.

"Oooh, thanks girl!" said Courtney as she unwrapped it. She took out a tube of lipstick.

"Oh my God!" she said. "I love this." She took of the lid and twisted the bottom. She quickly applied it to her lips and give a quick pucker.

"Looks good," said Victoria.

"Yeah, very cool," said Dana.

"Thanks guys," said Courtney. "And thank you, Taylor."

"No problem, knew it would suit you," she said. Dana reached in again.

"Alyssa!"

Alyssa took the rectangular present and sat back down. She took off the paper to reveal a book.

"Oh Night's Trappings, this has been on my reading list for a while."

"I thought it was," said Stella.

"It's awesome, thanks."

"Alright," said Dana. "Only two of you left," she said looking at Victoria and me. She reached in and pulled out a large cube shaped gift.

"Max…" said Dana. I went to grab the gift. "…You're gonna have to wait because this is for Victoria."

"Ouch, Dana," I said with a laugh.

"Sorry, couldn't resist," she said with a wink. Victoria took the gift.

"That was pretty mean," said Victoria.

"Learned from the best," said Dana raising her eyebrows. Victoria smiled and shook her head.

"Yeah, okay."

"Well, accept my peace offering, because this is from me," said Dana. Victoria looked back at Dana as she unwrapped it. My eyes widened when I saw how cool it looked. A carry case for a digital camera. Victoria turned the box around in her hands.

"This is really awesome," she said. "Thanks Dana."

Dana shrugged. "I aim to please," she said with a smile. Dana reached in and took out my gift before tossing the sack to the side. I took my gift. It felt slightly heavy.

"I assume this is from you?" I said to Victoria.

"Yep," she said. I unwrapped it and saw a book cover of a guy in black and white tuning a guitar. The title read "60 guitar songs for intermediate players."

"Oh wow," I said.

"I don't know how good you are so hope I got it right," said Victoria.

"I can play along to some stuff," I said. "So I guess intermediate would be the next step. Thanks."

"You can Kate will have to form a band," said Courtney.

"Yeah, Kate and Caulfield. Sounds so indie," said Brooke as we laughed.

"Thanks, Victoria," I said.

"No problem, was just worried you wouldn't like it," she said.

Dana clapped her hands together.

"Awesome, well good work everyone. Hope everybody enjoys their gifts-"

"Are you okay, Dana?" said Juliet as she placed her hand on Dana's shoulder. Dana looked back confused.

"Er, yeah?"

"I meant are you okay with the sacred Secret Santa being ruined?"

Dana slumped forward as we all laughed. When it subsided, Dana looked up and pretended to wipe away tears.

"I'm- I'm okay. I'll be fine," she said to more laughter. She stood up and moved near the tv before dropping the act. "Especially after a good movie!"

A few people whooped. Dana bent down and picked up the DVD.

"And our carefully selected movie is…Elf!"

We all clapped.

"I haven't seen it," said Victoria.

"Have you seen any movies, Victoria?" said Alyssa.

"She's seen Batman, we know that," said Brooke. Victoria pointed at Brooke.

"Well remembered." She pointed at Alyssa. "And shut the fuck up, of course I watch movies," she said with a smile.

"What's your favourite Christmas movie, Victoria?" said Kate.

Victoria contemplated the question for a moment.

"It's a Wonderful Life," she said finally.

"Why that one?" I said. It was not what I expected.

Victoria shrugged. "It's a classic, and I like the sadness of seeing a world where you'd never been born. Seeing that you actually did make a difference."

There was a silence.

"Wow," said Kate. "I didn't expect that from you."

"What can I say, Kate? I'm a complicated person," said Victoria.

Dana put the DVD in the machine.

"I don't think anyone would disagree, Victoria," she said. Victoria folded her arms and smiled slightly. Juliet moved up on the couch a little so Dana could squeeze in. Once the menu loaded up, Dana readied the remote.

"Ready?"

"Ready!" we all said. Dan hit play.

We all laughed; we all had a great time by the time the credits rolled. We all clapped and cheered; Victoria included.

"What did you think, Victoria?" I said.

"It was good," she said. "Buddy's a moron, but he's really sweet."

"Juliet," said Dana. "I think you've found your next movie reviewer for the Blackwell Totem."

Juliet laughed as Victoria rolled her eyes.

"Okay, guys," said Dana. "It's really late so I guess we should call it a night. Thanks for doing such an awesome job."

"And thank you for organising it all, Dana," said Kate.

"Oh, it was no problem. I'm a Christmas nut," she said.

"Yeah, we noticed," said Victoria. Dana narrowed her eyes at her.

"Okay, well before Victoria and I end up in a cat fight…" Everybody laughed. "…I'll wish all of you an awesome holiday, if we've ever earned a break, it's now."

Everybody agreed as we filed out of the living room and back out into the dorm hall. Everyone retired to their rooms and said good night. I went inside and sat on the edge of my bed. I held my gift from Victoria in my hands and looked over at my guitar.

I never did learn much beyond basic strumming. Guess I should change that…after the holidays.

I put the book down on the bed next to me and laid back, putting my hands behind my head as I stared at the ceiling.

Tonight was…awesome. Everyone was so amazing when I told them about Jefferson. I've got all of them on my side. I've got a therapist now. I've got my family too.

I sat up.

I can fucking do this.

Knock knock knock!

There was someone at my door. I got up and answered it. Victoria was stood holding a wrapped gift in her hands. A square box shape.

"Hey," she said. "Dana would probably kill me but this is your other gift." She held it out for me to take.

I took the gift.

"Victoria, you didn't have to do this," I said.

"Well technically I didn't buy it. It's something I'm passing on so I'm still within the spending limit."

"When did you know you were going to give me this?" I said.

"Er, for like the past week?"

"Okay. I just..." I put the gift down on my bed. "I wouldn't want this if you're only giving it to me because of what I said earlier tonight..."

Victoria's expression changed.

"I didn't...I'm sorry, Max. It makes me sick to think that Nathan-"

"He had nothing to do with me," I said quickly. "I'm sure of it. And everything he did was because of Jefferson grooming him. I don't hate Nathan for what he did."

Victoria nodded.

"How was he?" I said. "When you went to see him?"

"He's...still being treated. He has a lot of stuff to wade through but he's finally getting the treatment he needs. I get if you're not cheering him on as much as me, Max. But I really hope he gets better."

"I hope he gets better for the sake of Arcadia. His family have been nothing but bad for this town. But I like to hope that Nathan could be the one to break the chain someday."

Victoria nodded again.

"I gave him your envelope by the way. He didn't open it but he took it back with him."

I nodded.

"I'd better get to sleep," I said. "But thank you for the extra gift."

"You're welcome," said Victoria. "Have a good holiday."

"You too."

Victoria waved goodbye and went back to her room. I looked at the gift I had placed on my bed. I turned back to Victoria before she shut her door.

"Victoria?"

She opened her door again and looked at me.

"Yeah?"

"This gift," I said. "Is it photography related?"

She nodded.

"Okay," I said. "Then I can't open it yet. But I will someday. Hopefully soon."

"I hope so too," she said. "Goodnight, Max."

He closed her door and I closed mine. I opened up my wardrobe and put the gift inside. I gave it a final look before closing my wardrobe.