GENSOKYO MISADVENTURES: AKI'S PERSPECTIVE
Uff… I finally reached the back of the shrine.. I've been running for a long time! It's becoming night, and I don't wanna find out how the supposedly safe upper part of Youkai Mountain is at night!
Like before, I was running through Youkai Mountain normally, because I'm probably not competent enough to use my movement abilities here without falling into a comically placed bottomless pit or something.
The return trip was really uneventful. Didn't see anyone on the way back or nothing really happened, but it took a good freakin' amount of time!
[Quest completed: Successfully deliver the package to the underground]
[Reward: 3.500 AP IP]
Oh hey, I actually got a reward.. I personally think I deserve more but I'm too tired to care at the moment…
I slide open the door to the back of the shrine, into the little hall that connects to everywhere here. I'm wondering about what to do now, I kinda just want to maybe eat something then collapse in my futon, because all that sidequesting and running really tired me out!
I guess I should first announce that I arrived and stuff.
So, I move towards the door to the main room. I hear some movement there, so someone must be there right now. I move towards the door and..
*BAM* "AH!" Fuck, I opened it way to strongly for some reason and it just hit the wall, scaring Sanae that was apparently there in the kotatsu!
I struggle to get words out without gasping a lot first "I… huff, I came back!" I have successfully returned from the expedition.. barely!
Sanae has a very worried look on her face for some reason..! "Oh gods.. y-you're alive! You actually did it?!" Pfff, you think so lowly of me Sanae? Please…
"Well… yeah! Of course I did! Be sure to add a couple more life threatening experiences to my book, though" Of course my, up to this point, short life here in Gensokyo couldn't be complete without a couple of those!
She seems to breathe a huge sigh of relief for some reason… was she really THAT worried..?
Well, anyways "So how much time did I spend in the Underground? I completely lost track of time!" I mean, when I entered, the sun was still super up, yet it's night already!
Sanae thinks for a moment and says "Well.. you were gone for at least 5 hours…" What.
5?! Really? Did my stupid sidequest really take so much time? Maybe going to a different world underground changed my perception of time? Maybe time passes differently underground? So many questions…
…Wait a second, did she.. "Did… did you think I was already…umm, deceased?" Damn, is my life expectancy really that low here?
She looks to the side, before awkwardly saying "Well… maybe" Great.
Very great "Great" This is Great.
Am I really just.. expected to die? That seems very… oddly dark for a place like Gensokyo. But then again, not everything is sunshines and rainbow-colored lasers here apparently.
However, something is still bothering me "You know… why did Kanako choose such an oddly specific and dangerous task for me?" I'm sure you can measure trustworthiness in some other way that doesn't include almost freakin' killing me!
Sanae seems to just look down in.. tiredness? Frustration? "I.. I don't know…" You know what? Both of us seem very tuckered out, and she especially looks kinda.. stressed. I think I'll just go to sleep.
"You know, I think I'll just call it a day.." Time for my favorite activity: Sleeping!
As I turn to leave the main room, she just slouches over the kotatsu "Yeah, I'll do the same.." She's just gonna sleep there? Doesn't she have room? I mean, I can't fault her, really. Kotatsus are really comfortable!
I start wondering though.. how tiring is it to be a shrine maiden? You always get the memes of Reimu being lazy and all that, but Sanae seems to actually go out and do stuff!
I quickly reach the guest room. Throwing my leather satchel to the side, I just proceed to collapse in the futon again, because there's currently zero energy left in my body.
…
…
…Huh? Where.. where am I? This is some place.. apparently deep in the wilderness or something?
Wait a second, yeah of course, I'm dreaming! This is one of the perks of being the fanfiction protagonist, I get lucid dreams all the time!
Although, it doesn't seem like I get the ""being able to do anything"" type of dreams apparently. I can't fly around or do anything cool, dammit! I would have wanted to spawn all those youkai that have been chasing me and just …punch them. Yeah… punch those fuckers till they die.
Massive punch-youkai-to-extinction plan aside, what do I do exactly? You know, I've always been the type to get the super random, meaningless dreams. You say all dreams have meanings? Yeah sure, what was the meaning of that time I shoved a lobster into a cement mixer? What was it?!
"You know, it would be really convenient if someone told me the meaning of this dream!" I shout out, just to see what happens.
…
"...Well that didn't work" Man, no NPCS to interact with here? I'm gonna sue the game designers! Again, I'm in the middle of what looks to be the wilderness so.. I'll just walk in some random direction, I guess?
So I do just that and… if this dream ends without something interesting happening I'm going to be extremely disappointed.
After a few seconds, I come up to what looks like a campsite! There's a fire, with some logs to the sides.. and in one of them, a person is sitting!
That is.. oh wait. That ain't an NPC, that's Doremy Sweet! What is she doing here all of a sudden?
She just kinda stares at me, uhh.. "Hello?!" I prefer words rather than staredowns, Doremy!
Her expression is very… neutral "To be perfectly honest, even with where you came from being taken into consideration, I didn't expect you to have such… thoughts.. about the people here" Huh?
Wait.. oh yeah, she knows all about the Touhou """content""" I've both voluntarily and involuntarily seen, doesn't she? What is she doing snooping about that?
However, I think of something funny… "Ah, well you see, it all comes from one of the rules of the internet in which-" "No" She just interrupts me, huh… well, too bad! This is my dream and you can't do anything to-
…
…
Oof.. so I actually wake up to live another day! Cool I guess.
Still had that weird ass dream.. to be honest, I myself said that was a lucid dream, but it didn't feel like one! Also, what was Doremy doing there..? Everyone has to come check in on the new outsider or something? Maybe.
Looking out the window…It looks like I woke up earlier today than yesterday, since the sun has apparently just recently started to go up.
Everything looks… fine, actually. It's a beautiful day outside! The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming… and on days like these, guys like me…
…Should be remembering they HAVE COURT TODAY!
Fuck, I can't believe I completely forgot I had a trial for today! At what time is it? What should I do before? To whom should I even ask these questions?!
Ok, ok… calm down Aki, everything should be fine.. Kanako is the super know-it-all apparently. Asking her will probably be the way.
I get out of the guest room, and going into the hall… I see Suwako there! She's apparently entering from the back of the shrine "Hey, good morning! I see you actually completed the delivery! Piece of cake, right?" Yeah…
"Good morning, and uh.. to be honest, it wasn't. But I got it done and that's what matters!" I'm still alive, at least that's something.
She keeps going the way to the main room "Yeah, that's the spirit! Sanae will prepare some breakfast in a second, you wanna come in?" I mean.. sure.
However.. "Sure, but like.. is Sanae the only one that does… anything here?" You guys kinda seem to be overworking her!
Suwako actually gives a good argument "Ehh.. maybe, kinda. But I have no idea how to use an electric stove or those other thingies in the kitchen! I don't even reach them.." Oh, yeah right. It surely sucks to be short! (No [yes] offense to all the short people reading this!).
So we just move to sit in the kotatsu and I'm wondering… where is Kanako? You know I have some questions for her right now!
In fact, I'm gonna ask "Where's Kanako, actually?" She can't just disappear at the exact moment I need her!
Suwako just shrugs "Don't know! She's always out doing stuff, sometimes secret, sometimes not. She spends more time outside than inside the shrine when we don't have visitors, really. We Goddesses don't actually need to eat either, we just do it out of tradition or courtesy really" Uhuh.. do I not count as a visitor or something?
In any case, it seems I won't be seeing Kanako here anytime soon..
Wait, maybe.. "Hey Suwako, do you guys actually get the bunbunmaru newspaper?" Kanako seemed to have one the other day, the one that had the article about me, so maybe my trial and its details will be posted there?
"Yeah, it always gets delivered here sometime in the morning, maybe it's outside right now, in fact. Those Tengu are always very quick to deliver their stuff… why do you want it, though?" You're forgetting things, Suwako!
I stand up for a second "I'll go see if it's outside. It could have some… information I may need"
I walk up to the door that leads outside, sliding it open… I see a little rolled up newspaper on the ground. Yep, it's definitely here.
I quickly close the door after grabbing it, going back to the kotatsu "Yup, it actually arrived" These tengu are really dedicated to their reporting and stuff..
Suwako slightly raises a brow "What's the information you want out of that gossip-fest of a newspaper anyway?" Do you not remember this kind of big event I have going on right now?
"I think I mentioned before how I have a trial for today, for some reason. The thing is, I don't know where it's going to be held or at what time! The newspaper might have the information I need" My instincts tell me they probably want this trial to be really like a public execution that tons of people will see..
She just gains this overly exaggerated face of realization "Oh, yeah right.."
Suddenly, the door from inside the shrine slides open, Sanae coming in with a tea set in a tray and everything!
Gensokyo and it's freaking tea.. there's really nothing else for breakfast? I feel like I'm gonna get tired of drinking tea after like, a month. If I survive that long, of course..
"Here, Lady Suwako! and.. oh, hello there Aki! Didn't see you there.." She says as she lays down our tea.
You know.. there's a very striking contrast here. Sanae seems to be in her apparently usual energetic, happy and cheerful personality, which really is night and day compared to when I saw her yesterday, all stressed out and tired…
In any case, I should probably get to read this..
I open the bunbunmaru and start skipping through some headlines about kappa inventing stuff and… magicians having a love affair? I think I'll save that one for later…
Anyways, here's the big deal apparently.
-Bunbunmaru Newspaper-
-First trial in over a decade! Does the Youkai have a chance?-
-After the recent incident regarding the Youkai invasion of the Human Village 2 days ago, the Hakurei Shrine maiden managed to find the fugitive culprit, which was residing in the Moriya Shrine as detailed on our previous edition of the bunbunmaru newspaper. However, due to the culprit's apparent inability to fight, they have requested a trial to be held for their crimes.
-Even if trials haven't been performed in under a decade, the law still technically stands and it was on the Youkai's right to request one. Said trial is scheduled for 1 hour past the afternoon of the current date at the old courthouse to the east of the Human Village, and anyone can attend to spectate it. We'll update on the situation once this trial is finished.
-Honest and True reporter, Aya Shameiraru.
…You know, if I ever get super overpowered or something, the first thing I'm doing is slapping Aya in the face.
Well, right now it is morning, so I guess I have some hours to prepare. What would be to ""prepare"" in this situation? Uh…
Sanae suddenly asks me something "Hey, what are you reading there?" Classified CIA documents, obviously.
I just hand her the paper "Here, take a look" You guys will be attending my public execution? It's a nice family friendly event!
She just very quickly skims through it, her happy expression faltering for a bit "Oh, right.. you have your trial for today right?" Well, duh.
"Do you have any idea how I could defend myself in court?" Yeah, I only played the Ace Attorney games, I didn't go to law school!
Sanae just answers truthfully "I mean.. I'm not a lawyer, those don't even exist here.." Great "You would just need some evidence! You know, like in Ace Attorney!" You actually played it?
However "That evidence being…?" There's like, absolutely no evidence to help me out here, I think. But even then, do they even have evidence to go against me?
Sanae seems to think the exact same thing "Yeah.. but, there isn't a lot of evidence against you, right?" That's true, isn't it?
But.. "What about witnesses? I think there are a lot.." How many people saw me running around like a moron that day again? Pretty sure it's a lot.
She seems to try and think of something to say, but doesn't come up with anything as she just stays silent.. great.
I just noticed how Suwako hasn't said anything thus far "You, Suwako? Any ideas?" I'm in need of divine assistance!
Suwako just awkwardly smiles at me "Huh? I'm an earth Goddess! What do you want me to do exactly?" Huh?
"But like, aren't gods supposed to give advice to humans or something?" Last time I checked, people pray to gods for assistance in their daily lives!
Suwako just shrugs again "I kinda just turn into a frog and bless people! In my millions of years of lifetime, I haven't had to give anyone legal advice!" Dammit!
Well, it seems I'll just be going to defend myself blindly and with no preparation, perfect…
Now that I think about it.. "Hey Sanae, do you know where Kanako is?" I'm still curious as to why she hasn't shown up.
She seems a bit taken off-guard by the question "Lady Kanako? I think she's outside doing something. I haven't seen her today.." Wow, I wonder what really important and mysterious goddess stuff she must be doing… in reality, I realized I kinda don't.
Now that I think about it, can't Sanae just summon her like she does in her spellcards? Ehh.. maybe not, she probably doesn't want to bother her..
After that, we just stop talking and start drinking our Gensokyo-brand tea, since coffee hasn't been invented yet for some reason.
I'm still thinking about evidence… does anything I have prove my innocence? What are they even accusing me of anyway? Being a youkai? Invading the village? Both? Probably both..
Do they even have evidence against me? Do trials here even require it? Ahh.. there's just so many questions!
Suwako notices me thinking over stuff "Hey, don't worry your head off too much! It's not healthy!" It's also not healthy getting publicly executed! I need to think over this stuff!
Sanae does the same "You have time to prepare! I'm sure you'll figure something out… eventually!" That doesn't give me a lot of confidence…
But, to be honest, I kinda just want to enjoy my breakfast before all this shitshow begins later..
(GENSOKYO MISADVENTURES TEA PARTY: THE SEQUEL)
Well, our tea is finished. We are just currently sitting around, not doing much really. But right now, I have an idea.
"Ok, the only thing I think could be useful as evidence is maybe the previous bunbunmaru or something, really got no other ideas" I mean, what else could I use really?
Sanae quickly responds "I.. think I threw it to the paper bin over there" She says as she points to the corner of the room next to the door that leads outside.
I stand up and move to get there. Retrieving my only piece of evidence from a trash bin doesn't give me confidence, really..
But when I was going to grab it..
*SLAM* "OOW!" Fuck, the door just slid open so fast and hit me on my side! Who the fuck is there?!
"R-Reimu?!" Sanae shouts all of a sudden. Dammit, that is indeed Reimu! What are you doing here?!
Suwako seems to be surprised as well "Woah, hey there Reimu! You came to worship?!" I don't think that's the appropriate thing to say here, Suwako!
Looking at her.. she has a little smile that doesn't do a good job of hiding the obvious anger she apparently has right now "Hey Sanae, would you mind me taking him to his trial? It's right about now!" What?!
But the thing said.."Hey, isn't it a bit earlier than expected?!" There should be at least a couple of hours left before it starts!
Reimu now looks at me and oh god that little smiling stare is terrifying "Nope, don't care! I want to end this right now!" Why?!
Sanae stands up to get closer "You can't just go around breaking schedule, Reimu! What about the others that would be going there?" She actually has a good point!
However, our red shrine maiden over here doesn't seem to give a damn "Already told the others, it doesn't matter. Now, let's go" She says and..
*SNATCH* Dammit, she just grabs me by my arm and starts flying holy shit how fast is this?! This must be a bit faster than my dash jumps! Also, ow ow ow, going so fast and only grabbing me by my arm really fucking hurts!
Sane quickly starts flying as well "Hey, wait up Reimu!" She doesn't seem to want to do that..
Suwako also quickly flies out of the shrine "Oh boy, I have to see this!" What's so exciting?!
…
You cannot believe how much my arm hurts, fuuuuck…
We've been flying for at least 5 minutes, with Sanae and Suwako tailing Reimu carrying me in a really unorthodox way.
In that really short amount of time however, we have already reached the village. We are in one of the corners of the village, actually. Here there's this really old looking building, and as we get closer to land…
*THUNK* Agh! Reimu just drops me to the ground, making me eat dirt for like the fifth time. It's been a while since I've done that… "Here, enter this ""courtroom"" or whatever Marisa called it, I'll go through the back" She says as she goes behind the building to enter through a backdoor apparently… for some reason.
Suwako goes to where I am slumped over in the dirt "Hey, you okay? That didn't look like a light fall!" Well, again, apparent fall damage immunity made it not hurt at all I guess.
I quickly stand up "Have taken worst at this point… but in any case, I think I need to get going.." Time to see if I can somehow defend myself.
I go through these double doors, and enter some sort of waiting area, with no one on it. There's one big door here, that when I open it and enter… wow.
This… looks like a very western and, to be honest, stereotypical courtroom. You know, the type you see in movies and games. There's 2 desks to either side, probably for the defense and prosecution. And behind both of them, there's a big gallery for the spectators.. holy fuck, how many people came here?!
First off, to the left, I see some of the Buddhist girls. I recognize Byakuren, Shou, Nazrin and Ichirin… why are they here?!
Then, in contrast, to the right I see all the taoist gang. I recognize Miko, Futo and Tojiko. Are villagers okay with just having a ghost there..?
Near the taoists and between some filler looking villagers I spot who I think is Hieda no Akyuu and Kosuzu. Imagine if this stupid shit gets on the Gensokyo chronicle..
Oh, and I also see in one of the corners of the left gallery Miss gap-hag herself, Yukari! She even smiles and waves at me when I look over at her! You fucking son of a bitch..
Sanae interrupts my thoughts though "Hey Aki, over there on the left I think it's supposed to be where you are going, good luck!" She says as she just floats up to the gallery, Suwako following her. It seems I'm entirely on my own for this one..
I move to my desk, and I guess it's time to wait. I have some questions though, like, who's the judge? Who even is the prosecutor? To be honest, I can't think of anyone here that could be the judge, maybe except for the yama or something, which I doubt is currently here..
"Alright, I got the manual.." I hear a voice coming from behind the judge's bench, and.. that's Reimu.
Really?! The judge is fucking REIMU?! She probably is one of the worst people for that position..
Now, I see someone coming in from the other desk, so the prosecution is… Keine. Keine herself is the prosecution? You know, I feel like all of these positions have a very clear bias that won't go in my favor..
Reimu doesn't seem to know what she's doing, as she is clearly reading from some sort of manual.. "Alright.. so, everyone, shut up! The trial is about to commence and.. yeah. Are the defense and the uh.. prosecution, ready? Actually, don't answer that. Keine, go through the… introductory statement or.. something" I get why being a judge is a career that takes extreme discipline and education…
Keine seems to cringe a little bit before clearing her throat and speaking "Ejem.. so, 3 days ago, on the 19th of June, 139, the village was invaded by Youkai in the middle of the night of the full moon. The prosecution will prove the defense over there to be a Youkai disguised as an Outsider and the culprit of this event!" She says while pointing at me!
I realized how nobody here knows my name, so I guess I'll just be the ""the defense"" for now..
Also.. everyone is looking expectantly at me..? I don't think the defense is supposed to say anything here, but.. "Well, I will defend myself to prove I'm not a youkai and just some outsider that was followed into the village, I guess.." I'm surprised no one even considered that a possibility..
Reimu checks her little manual again before saying "So.. I think you call your witness now right? I think it was like that.." She says as she checks her manual again..
Keine does a slight facepalm for a second "Yes, Hakurei… the prosecution wishes to call their first witness, Marisa Kirisame!" Hold up, what?! What does Marisa have to do with this?
Now from the gallery behind me, Marisa just jumps out and lands over there in the little witness stand or whatever "Heya, Keine! Whatcha need me for?" I'm still wondering what the hell does she have to do with anything..
Keine still maintains a very serious expression "First of all, your name and occupation" She's going for all the formalities, I guess.
Marisa thinks for a second before saying "Well.. I'm Marisa Kirisame! Occupation being.. uhh.. magician, I guess" Very good introduction right there.
"Would you mind telling us what you saw that night regarding the crime?" I'm still slightly shocked at Keine being all cordial and formal in this super unprofessional courtroom..
The magician just scratches her head for a second "Well.. sure!" Alright..
*WITNESS
TESTIMONY*
Oh, cool! We get Ace Attorney title cards and everything? Nice!
"It was very late at night, I was up doing some experiments when I felt a strange presence appear near the forest"
"I then started hearing a lot of rumbling, and when I went outside to check, I managed to notice this super big horde of youkai on the path that leads to here!"
"There was this guy at the front of them, leading them towards the village. It was very dark, but with the light that emerges from the trees in the forest, I'm pretty sure I saw the figure of this guy!"
"I started to quietly follow them behind some trees so as to not get spotted. And not long after that, I saw how he entered the village! Leading his entire youkai army with him!"
…
Wait, that's it? That was short.. and lacking some details, I think.
Reimu seems to be very eager to end this "Cool! That makes him the culprit right? Can we get this done with?" No!
It's time to speak up "Hold it! The defense doesn't get to cross-examine the witness?!" I'm pretty sure that's like what I'm supposed to be doing!
Reimu just seems annoyed "Cross-examine the witness? Wait, wasn't it like.." And she checks her little manual again..
Keine just sighs "Hakurei, the defense gets to cross-examine the witness. It's a common procedure.." Thanks for that one..
Our judge here just closes her manual in annoyance "Ugh.. ok, sure, go ahead with your cross examination.. whatever that means" This is going to be long..
So, uh.. I guess I should tell her "So.. Marisa, would you mind repeating your testimony? It's courtroom proceedings and all" I'm pretty sure I'm not the one that should be telling her this but Reimu doesn't seem to know what a cross-examination even is..
Marisa looks at me slightly confused apparently "..Sure" Now we can start..
*CROSS
EXAMINATION*
"It was very late at night, I was up doing some experiments, when I felt a strange presence appear near the forest"
"Hold it!" I shout, and everyone just looks at me…! "Ee-uhm, w-what were you doing being up so late at night?" Didn't it become morning just like, half an hour later?
She seems slightly offended at that "I'm just very dedicated to my research-ze! You can't blame me!" Huh?!
"Who in their right mind would stay awake so long? How were you even awake?!" Last time I checked, you girls didn't seem to have invented coffee or energy drinks!
Keine doesn't seem to be having this though "OBJECTION! We're not here to badger on the witness's strange sleeping habits! Cease this line of questioning!" Well, fuck.
"I then started hearing a lot of rumbling, and when I went outside to check, I managed to notice this super big horde of youkai on the path that leads to here!"
"Hold it! Marisa, you happen to be one of Gensokyo's most notable youkai exterminators, correct?"
Marisa does a whole pose with her mini-hakkero and everything "You bet! I'm the best Youkai exterminator around these parts!" Reimu just looks at her with a weird stare.. yeah, no one here believes that.
In any case, I have to bring this up "If that's the case, why didn't you intervene? I'm sure someone like you would be itching to fight so many Youkai" I find it very weird that she didn't do anything..
It seems that question caught her off guard, as she very quickly blurts out an answer "Well, I wasn't feeling like it that night you know? Nothing else!" Aha?
Reimu has something to say "Marisa, you were shooting master sparks at fairies near my shrine at 3AM the other night. In fact, you get into so many fights at night, that Alice came complaining to you the other day for all the noise you make" Wait, really?
Marisa seems kinda nervous now! "W-well.. I was doing experiments and stuff! I wasn't in the mood for fighting!" Yeah right..
I slam my hands on the desk! It actually kinda hurt.. "This behavior seems very out of character for someone like you, Marisa!" It really is!
"OBJECTION!" Keine interjects again! "All of this banter is meaningless! Even if the witness's behavior is strange, do you have any evidence that would prove her wrong in her statements?" Uhh..
Fuck, she got me there.. "Well, I.. don't, really.." Dammit, she clearly knows I don't have any evidence!
The ""judge"" now says "Then just continue the testimony already, I want to go home.." Reimu, please…
"There was this guy at the front of them, leading them towards the village. It was very dark, but with the light that emerges from the trees in the forest, I'm pretty sure I saw the figure of this guy!"
"Hold it! Could you describe in more detail what this person was doing?" I want to test something..
Marisa thinks for a moment "Well.. you were just running along with them, obviously! Nothing else to note, really" Ok.. with this, I can already notice she might be lying. I was sliding and dodging fairies for a lot of that time!
…
..And I just realized that I ran out of questions to ask there.
Once the silence builds up, Keine speaks up "Could you not ask meaningless questions? You are wasting everybody's time!" And I will continue doing so if it means saving my ass!
"I started to quietly follow them behind some trees so as to not get spotted. And not long after that, I saw how he entered the village! Leading his entire youkai army with him!"
"Hold it!" I may have something here.. "Marisa, would you mind describing how I supposedly entered the village?" This answer could reveal a lot.
Marisa is starting to look a bit nervous! "Well.. you entered through the gate, like everybody does, right?" Exactly. And that's where you're wrong.
"OBJECTION!" I shout out this time, all eyes focus on me as I deliver my argument..! Oof, the nervousness is real! "Marisa, there seems to be something very clearly wrong in your testimony!"
The witch is starting to look more nervous! "W-what?! What's so wrong about it?!" Oh, you sweet summer child..
I direct my gaze to Keine "Could the prosecution describe what the protocols for the closing of the gates to the village are?"
Keine doesn't change her expression "Hmm? The gates to the Human Village are scheduled to close every single day at around midnight, they are only opened by me at around 6AM… oh" Gotcha!
I slam my hands on the table! "How could I have entered the village through the gate, if they are closed off at midnight, Marisa?!" I did enter, but in a different way!
Marisa is sweating now! "B-but, you…" Not getting away from this one!
"A lot of this testimony is so vague and unfitting for you! It almost seems like it is a totally fabricated lie!" I think I got her now!
Just as Marisa was apparently thinking of an answer to that..
"OBJECTION!" Wait, what?!
Keine has something to say! "This is completely irrelevant, for you managed to enter the village! That's a fact, and there's evidence to back it up!" She now takes out the photo of the bunbunmaru newspaper I read that one time, the photo of me being chased by Keine before arriving at the village walls..
She points at me now! "What you just said confirms you somehow managed to get over the village walls, a feat no regular human or outsider could do!" Fuck, I didn't think this through, haven't I..?
I have to say something though.. "S-still! Marisa's testimony is unreliable at best! It shouldn't be accounted for!" Dammit, this didn't go so well..
Keine is focused "Even if her testimony wasn't reliable, you just have proven the fact that the gates were closed. Meaning you have some superhuman capabilities to go over the walls, which in turn, means you are a Youkai!" What?!
"OBJECTION! Just because I have some special abilities doesn't mean I'm a youkai! Look at our witness here, a human with magical abilities, yet not a youkai! Outsiders have shown up here before with out-of-the-ordinary abilities as well!" Fuck, I need to somehow get out of this hole I just dug myself into..
Keine just grunts for a second "Hmph. To stop your stupid arguments from flowing into this courtroom and wrapping this up, the prosecution wishes to summon their next witness" She looks at Marisa now "Yes, you can leave now" She had to clarify?
Marisa just runs out of the witness stand "Finally.. this is horrible!" It would be better if you didn't lie! To be honest, that testimony still seems to me that it was completely fabricated…
Reimu speaks after a long while of not doing so "And who would be this next witness..?" I don't think she's really ""judging"" anything right now. In fact, she's just sitting there almost as if she was dozing off before speaking..
Keine gains a little smirk actually "Aya, the Tengu reporter" Great, fucking great.
Aya suddenly flies in from somewhere out of my view and lands on the witness stand "Ayaya! Here's Honest and True reporter, Aya Shameiraru!" She seems way too excited for this..
Keine actually seems confident now "Dear reporter, would you mind telling us what you saw the night of the incident?" Why so much confidence now?!
"Of course!" This is going to be great..
*WITNESS
TESTIMONY*
"I was late at night preparing new editions of the Bunbunmaru newspaper, when I got the rumors of a huge Youkai horde on the path to the Human Village!"
"I immediately went there with my trusty camera, and looking quietly from above for my next scoop.. I found it!"
"The culprit, that man over there, was leading just in front of the Youkai, going directly towards the center of the village!"
"I watched how Keine, after appearing very late for some reason, completely annihilated all the Youkai… except for him, who managed to slip away!"
"When the sun had risen after all of that, I even managed to take a picture of Keine chasing him!" She now shows the photo Keine presented earlier..
"I saw everything! This man led the charge toward the village, and it's his fault the center of it now lies in ruins!"
Uhuh… this one is more complete, but I think I know what questions to ask. Why didn't she take more photos..?
Keine seems to notice me thinking over stuff "Giving up already?" Huh?!
"Of course not! I wish to proceed with my cross-examination!" I won't give up here anytime soon!
She just seems annoyed "Hmph. You stubborn Youkai.. when will you learn to not waste our time?" I don't give a damn about you or your time! I'm trying not to get executed here!
*CROSS
EXAMINATION*
"I was late at night preparing new editions of the Bunbunmaru newspaper, when I got the rumors of a huge Youkai horde on the path to the Human Village!"
"Hold it! What are these ""rumors"" you speak of?" I mean, how did the information reach her in the first place?
"Oh, I overheard some of the night patrol tengus talking about it outside my window, I just had to check it out!" She seems confident about this…
So, complete coincidence, huh? "I imagine you took action immediately so that the other tengu didn't beat you to the punch, right?"
Aya keeps her confident expression "Of course I did!" Well, she's the fastest after all, isn't she?
..Yeah I don't think this will go anywhere… "Well.. can you continue?" Nothing else to ask here, really.
"I immediately went there with my trusty camera, and looking quietly from above for my next scoop.. I found it!"
"Hold it! Would you mind giving some details about this camera of yours?" I noticed how Aya's camera seems to be.. way more modern looking than what I usually see her depicted with, and this could lead into a good argument..
Aya seems super excited to talk about this "It's my trusty, Kappa engineered, professional reporter camera I've used for years! Comes with many features that allow me to take all the photos I need wherever and whenever!"
She now takes a photo of the courtroom "This is going to be great! Trial in Gensokyo goes awry! What is the fate of the condemned Youkai? Could all of this had been a-"
*SMASH* "UAH!" From out of nowhere, a yin-yang orb appeared and hit Aya on the back of the head, making her fall over! "Hey! It says here that no photos are allowed in the courtroom for some reason, so stop that!" This was the best judge Gensokyo could muster for this?
Aya quickly stands up "Ugh.. you're no fun! Hakurei shrine maiden attacks news reporter! Is this the start of a new-"
"OBJECTION!" Oh, that was Keine.. "Can we just… continue already?!" Yeah, we probably should..
"The culprit, that man over there, was leading just in front of the Youkai, going directly towards the center of the village!"
"Hold it! What would you mean by ""leading"" exactly?" I'm still not sure why this is the assumption everyone got out of all that..
She thinks for a moment before replying "Hmm.. you were at the front of the group, showing them the way to the center of the village, obviously!" Really now?
"How can you be so sure that they were being led by me and not just following me?" I think the second option is the most reasonable and deductible in that situation!
Aya seems to stumble on her own words now "W-well, I mean… they like, they weren't attacking or anything, they surely were being led by you!" Fuck, this is just a complete and blatant lie, but I can't prove it!
Keine decides to speak up "What is the point of all these questions? Again, you're just wasting everybody's time!" Shut up! I swear I'm getting to something here!
But I think I have to concede for now "Ok.. alright, continue with the testimony.." I got enough information out of that, probably..
"I watched how Keine, after appearing very late for some reason, completely annihilated all the Youkai… except for him, who managed to slip away!"
"Hold it! Would we happen to know as to why Keine failed spectacularly in her duty to protect the village that night?" It's probably something related to her being in her were-hakutaku form that night, but I want to see what Aya answers.
She once again takes a pause before answering.. "...No idea! This could actually be a great headline! Village protector slacks off on her duties! Is she taking lessons from the Hakurei?! Hey, wait-"
*SMASH* It wasn't long before she got hit by both a yin-yang orb AND some of Keine's danmaku. And speaking of Keine, she now says "Hmph.. matters regarding my whereabouts at that moment are personal and of no relevance to the matter at hand, cease this line of questioning!" Ugh..
Reimu just yawns "Could you guys do something already? I'm getting bored here.." This judge is really fucking bad, holy shit..
"When the sun had risen after all of that, I even managed to take a picture of Keine chasing him!"
"HOLD IT!" This question right here could reveal a lot or completely screw over things depending on the answer.. "For the fastest and most reliable reporter in Gensokyo, something seems very odd here. Why didn't you take more pictures of this apparently big event?"
Aya is looking nervous now! "W-well, it was dark, obviously! I couldn't have taken any pictures until the sun had risen!" Aha? I really think you could have gotten something with the limited light there..
Keine speaks up "Are you mentally challenged? This is extremely obvious! What will get you to quit?!" Oh, getting annoyed now, are we? Well..
"OBJECTION!" I fucking have it right here "Aya, for being the honest and true reporter of Gensokyo… I can't believe you would tell such a blatant lie!"
She looks completely shocked at that "W-w-what?! What do you mean?! My testimony is clean as a whistle!" Yeah, right..
It's time to lay down some things "Let me remind the courtroom of what you just said a few moments ago. You just testified that your camera was engineered by the kappa, and let you take photos whenever and wherever, right?"
Aya doesn't seem to know how to respond "Y-yeah, obviously!" Aha..
I slam my hands on the table "Taking into account both of those factors, I doubt the darkness would have been a deterrent for your journalism, as your camera would very obviously have night vision or even a simple flash feature!" Even basic outside world cameras have a flash feature of some kind! And even without it, I'm sure you could still get something with the limited light in the village!
She seems to be sweating right now "How.. how can you be so sure?! Are you an expert in cameras or something?!" It's just so fucking obvious, you dumbass bird!
"Then, would you be so kind as to show the courtroom the different features of your camera? If there isn't anything that would let you see in the darkness, you could show us the lack of that feature right now!" She just can't escape this, I've cornered her!
"Well, uhm, you see, I..." Aya just holds her head and looks downwards in apparent frustration! "DAMMIT!" Yep, I got her.
All of a sudden, Reimu speaks up "Hey, so you know that lying in this courtroom is a crime apparently, so stop that or I'll beat you up!" That's the one thing you're good at, huh?
Aya seems defeated "Well.. so sorry for that! It's just that the truth is a bit embarrassing!" Embarrassing?
What could it be.. "Could you tell us the truth then?" Did she…
"Well.. I actually took another picture! This one was too low quality to be used in the Bunbunmaru, I just couldn't release it like this!" She says as she pulls out a photo from her pocket! What?!
I immediately slam my hands on the desk "Does this mean the prosecution was concealing evidence?!" Isn't that illegal? Well, I haven't checked the Gensokyo legal code or anything…
The gallery goes up in murmurs for a second, before Reimu intervenes by slamming her gohei on the bench "Hey, order here! Shut up!" She now directs her gaze to the prosecution "Keine, doesn't it say here that concealing evidence is a crime?" Wow, are you actually rooting for me this time?
Keine actually only has a slightly shocked expression "T-the prosecution obviously didn't know about this! What is this piece of evidence?" I.. really can't determine if she's lying about that or not…
Aya quickly takes out more photos that are apparently copies of that one "Sure!" And with her super sonic speed or something the photos just appear on our desks for us to inspect. Let's see..
The photo has a night vision filter of some kind, with us looking mostly like silhouettes. It shows the moment when Keine first showed up, taken from above in a slightly diagonal angle from her back left. It also shows me sliding below her, with danmaku being fired at me by this massive amount of youkai behind me… bingo.
Keine analyzes the photo, and has a slightly worried expression.. I think she has noticed what I noticed. You weren't expecting that, weren't ya?
"OBJECTION!" No holding back now! "Hakurei, everyone, this piece of evidence.. just completely proves my innocence!" It actually does!
The galleries fall into murmurs again, which makes Reimu proceed to slam her gohei on the bench once again "Hey, hey! You people aren't allowed to talk, shut up!" She now looks at me "What the hell do you mean?!" Isn't it obvious?
It's time to deliver this "First of all, I want to direct the court's attention to Aya's testimony, as once again, it's completely inaccurate!" Stop lying, dammit!
Aya didn't seem to be expecting that "Huh?! I didn't lie this time, I swear!" You did and you know it, stupid crow!
I have to point this out "She has testified that ""They weren't attacking or anything"" which is completely proven false in this picture, where you can very clearly see the Youkai shooting danmaku at me!"
Reimu inspects the photo, noticing the same thing as I "Wait.. it's true! The Youkai were actually shooting him with danmaku! Is.. is he actually innocent?!" Yes, finally!
"OBJECTION!" Wait, what?! Keine?!
"I want to propose a simple question: Why would our reporter here lie about this? Can we even be completely sure that the danmaku was aimed at him specifically? The camera's angle could interfere in how we see the danmaku in this picture!" What.
...
This argument is just… really fucking stupid. Why does she want to accuse me? This very clearly proves I'm human! There's nothing else to do here! What does she have to gain by accusing me?!
Reimu doesn't seem to completely agree with this, but.. "I mean.. it looks very clear to me that the danmaku is being shot at him, but.. why would Aya lie about this? Even with her history regarding lying.. it seems very meaningless to lie here. Also, these.. camera devices can't always be so accurate, can they?" No, Reimu! You seriously believe this shit?!
Aya tries to salvage her credibility apparently "Y-yeah, of course! I wouldn't lie about this! Why would I?" No..
Keine seems to compose herself now, and even looks confident "Well, what do you have to say? The evidence could be interpreted as if the Youkai were shooting at you, but it isn't definitive! It would also be incoherent for our reporter to lie here, wouldn't it? Can you explain that, or will you just give up already?"
…
I've had it with this shit. You think you're so clever, huh? Well, I got bad news for you and your fucking stupid arguments miss ""human protector"". You love your reputation so much that you will argue against someone who is completely innocent just to uphold it?
"OBJECTION!" Sorry, I ain't giving up that easily.
The entire courtroom looks at me with anticipation. So, I take a deep breath before laying out things…
"Of course I can. There's a very clear reason for a lot of things here. A very clear reason for the testimony's inconsistencies. A very clear reason for some of our unanswered questions we have at the moment.." And it's fucking wild.
Reimu looks at me very intrigued "That reason being..?" Here it goes..
I slam my hands on the desk "Ladies and gentlemen! A lot of our questions here are answered by the simple fact that this entire accusation against me is a hypocrisy-ridden farse! For the one accusing me of being a youkai.." I point my finger towards my target.. "Is a youkai HERSELF!"
Keine seems really surprised at that "W-WHAT?!" No objections for you here, missy.
The courtroom goes wild, the murmurs being so high up in volume I don't know if they can be considered murmurs anymore "Hey, I want order here! Shut up! SHUT UP!!" Reimu says as she slams her gohei on her bench repeatedly.
I look towards Keine, who currently has an extremely shocked expression. Your secret is getting out and it's entirely your fault, fucker.
After a lot of slamming from the gohei, the galleries calm down. Reimu now looks at me "What is the meaning of this?!" I thought you already knew this, Reimu. Didn't you fight her in Touhou 8? Maybe some other group played the extra stage..
In any case, it is time to lay down my argument "Let's look at a couple of our unanswered questions here. Why did Keine arrive so late at such a catastrophic scene, her being the extremely dedicated protector of the village? She was out somewhere, hiding her true youkai form, clearly"
Keine is struggling and, honestly, failing to look composed here "I-I… you.." No words here, huh?
I have to continue "Why was she in her true youkai form, you might ask? Well, the answer is obvious, for a were-hakutaku's true youkai form only manifests in the full moon. Ask yourselves, have you ever seen Keine on the night of the full moon? Because the answer is obviously not. This is also very clearly why Keine just refuses to speak about what she was doing that night!" She was probably hanging around in the bamboo forest with her pal Mokou or something..
The galleries go into some murmurs again, as they apparently ask between themselves that question, all of them reaching the same conclusion.
Reimu does so as well "Wait, it's true, isn't it? Keine, what do you have to say about this?!" I can already imagine what she's about to say…
Keine lays out her expected and soon-to-be final argument "But.. all of this.. can be explained some other way, probably.." Aha " You.. you don't have evidence to back up this claim, obviously! How could I have a true Youkai form, like you claim? This is preposterous! This accusation.. would also be irrelevant for this case!" No evidence, you say?
Reimu states the obvious "Well.. that's true. Even if a lot of things line up, you need some sort of evidence for such an accusation.. and an actual reason for it, guy-whose-name I don't know!"
Well.. "The name's Aki, by the way. And as for your petition.." This is it…
"TAKE THAT!"
I quickly take out the photo Aya presented earlier "I want everyone to take a closer look at this photo. Specifically, at what is obviously Keine's silhouette" Such a fucking miniscule detail in this photo is going to save my life..
Reimu seems confused for a second "Yeah? What about her?" Don't tell me you didn't notice..
"Please, take a closer look at the sides of her head" Due to the angle, it's a bit harder to see at a first glance, but it's very obvious once you look into it a bit more.
She seems to notice what I'm talking about "Wait.. is that.." Exactly.
Time to give one last clarification "Indeed. Those are horns. One of the clear marks of a were-hakutaku youkai, whose form only appears on the night of the full moon! And we can clearly see Keine doesn't possess any of those right now!" You're done for!
Keine is holding her head, clearly not knowing what to say… but I know what I should be saying in this precise instant.
"This answers everything! The reason why Aya didn't show this picture and both she and Marisa completely lied in their testimonies! They were ordered by Keine to do so! The reason in Aya's case was to hide the fact that Keine is a youkai, and in Marisa's case, to better accuse me of this invasion by making me incriminate myself via a trap! All of this comes with one, very clear motive:"
I slam my hands on the desk, pointing forwards after doing so "To save her reputation by putting the blame of the destruction of the village onto someone else! Even going as far as accusing an innocent man just to make people forget that she completely failed in her duty to protect the village, just to maintain her secret youkai identity! Making this entire incident, accusation against me, and the reason we are all here... HER fault!"
Uff.. I think that's everything…
Everyone has shocked expressions on their faces, including the galleries, the prosecution, and the ""judge"". So, time to wrap this up with one last question.
"So, Keine, can you explain that, or will you just GIVE UP ALREADY?!"
…
Keine is just holding her head, while shaking it from side to side, very clearly in panic "No.. it cant.. I..I won't…. N-NOOOOOOOO!"
*SLAM* Keine just smashes her head into the desk, actually burying it in the wood from the amount of force..
…
So.. is it over?
The courtroom just went completely and utterly silent.. it's becoming a bit uncomfortable..!
However, the silence is broken by a surprised Reimu "I… really wasn't expecting an outcome like this.. but given everything… it seems that the result is clear, somehow. I guess that the defendant, Aki, is actually..
*NOT GUILTY*
I..
I did it..?
YES, I ACTUALLY DID IT!
Some of the crowd starts cheering and everything! I can't fucking believe this, I get to live another day!
I look at the gallery behind me, the Buddhist girls looking very surprised. And as for Yukari.. I notice she actually isn't there anymore..? What?
Looking at the one in front of me, I see the taoists and the Moriya girls cheering! I also see Akyuu just very quickly writing in some notebook, it seems I'm getting documented..
Reimu speaks again "Alright, since all this stuff is over, and I'll have to discuss with Keine about what just happened.. I declare that.." She opens her little manual again for a second…
"..That this court is dismissed! You can all go now!" Finally!
I step off from my desk, it definitely served me well. I take one last look at Keine… and realize she still has her head buried in the desk. She really hasn't moved an inch. Actually… is she crying?
I mean.. do I feel bad for her? Uhh.. not particularly…?
However, as I exited the courtroom and went into the little waiting area.. I suddenly get glomped from my right side! What!
"You.. you did it! You actually did it!" Hey.. that's Sanae! Uhh..
Well, getting hugged by a girl that's slightly smaller than you is.. em.. interesting. Especially when you can feel all her.. ok, not sugarcoating it, that's just her boobs on my arm. Ummm…
I turn my head to look at her as she lets go of me "Y-yeah, I somehow managed to clutch that by the skin of my teeth.." That was way more complicated than just playing Ace Attorney, I assure you!
Suwako comes up to me from my left now! "Heya! You did good! Best trial I've ever seen… or even attended, but still!" Well, it isn't supposed to be entertaining exactly..
Sanae just has that look in her eyes "It was crazy! You even fell for a trap, but still went OBJECTION! and presented evidence and everything, and.. it was just so cool!" Maybe, but..
"Yeah, thanks.. but it was probably the most stressful situation of my entire life…" Not even running away from youkai can be compared to this!
Suwako just pats me on the back "Oh come on, don't get like that now! We have to celebrate!" Huh?
"Celebrate…?" Really? Is that a good reason to?
Sanae just seems to read my thoughts "Any excuse to celebrate is a good one! Let's go back to the shrine!" I mean, sure. I want to rest after all of that…
We come out of the building and.. woah! I just feel super weird all of sudden! You know that feeling when like, one of your feet feels like TV static? Well.. my whole body is feeling like that right now!
But then it ends and I feel... good! I feel revitalized all of a sudden! What happened?
[Quest completed: TAKE THAT! Win your case in court]
[Reward: 5.000 AP IP]
Holy shit, that's a great reward! But.. what was the deal with my body..?
[Level up! LVL 4--8]
Hey, I got a level up?! That's awesome! Don't really know what they do, but still great I guess!
[Level ups are a general stat increase]
General stat increase..? I mean, I don't feel all that different, really… but I guess I'll see what this means later.
Sanae looks at me slightly confused "Is something wrong?" Uhh..
"Ehh.. nothing really, I was just thinking about stuff" Imagine if I had to justify fucking stat increases to people. That would be weird!
Suwako speaks up now "How about we buy some sweets for when we come back to the shrine? We can celebrate like that!" Sweets?
Before I can even respond, Sanae already answers herself "Yes! Let's go!" Woah girl, isn't that a bit too much enthusiasm?
Anyways, I can't deny sweets myself "Sure, doing anything not life threatening right now would be good!" It really is!
As we start to walk out of this place, I start thinking..
Man, after all of that, will I finally get a break? Getting sweets and going to the shrine is just something that is statistically impossible to go wrong, right?
Also, that isn't foreshadowing. I really mean it!
Sanae just looks at me for a second with a calm expression "Come on, you're safe now! No need to worry!"
…
To be honest, something about that just makes me smile a bit.
Suwako actually notices this "Woah! Mister slightly-depressed decides to smile for once? It only took a cute shrine maiden for it!" Oh, come on!
I look at her for a second "Don't tell me ""mister slightly-depressed"" is the only image you have of me!" Seriously?!
Suwako just laughs as we continue walking. Sanae giggling a bit too... come on, seriously?!
This is the note in which this chapter is going to end? Really?!
[LVL 8 Professional Lawyer, "Aki"]
A level up and a ton of points in this chapter! Great!
[Abilities]
Ultrakill movement: Didn't turn out exactly like I wanted it to, but it ended up being slightly useful in the end. Let's me do a lot of crazy movement shit like very high jumps, sliding indefinitely, wall jumping up to 3 times, fast fall with a slam and dash in any direction with 3 dashes that have a slight cooldown each. Can combine these to do more insane movement tech that lets me go so fast is kinda uncontrollable, but could be useful situationally. Also, apparently fall damage immunity, but still not too sure if it exists yet.
Mental Fortitude: No one can mindfuck me without my consent! Immune to mental manipulation techniques and stuff. There are probably like, 3 people in Gensokyo with abilities like that, but it's still something!
[Inventory]
Compass: A regular compass I bought of the system because I forgot to ask Kasen for directions that one time like a dumbass
I just now realized I left my satchel thing at the shrine, so no inventory right now.
[10.600 AP] [17.100 IP]
Holy shit, I'm actually rich now! I need to see what to spend these on, or if I should just save them for later..
AUTHORS NOTE OR SOMETHING: Finally finished this chapter! Took some time.
Ace Attorney discussions are fun to write and make, but damn it can be difficult and takes some time. I think this entire thing went through 3 drafts before I found it decent enough.
Our guy has access to the village now, which means more random shenanigans can happen, now including the village this time. It's not a location I want to over-use really, but things can happen there and that could be cool.
Our guy also gets time to relax, but for real this time. Doesn't mean trouble will stop finding him eventually though.
Also, don't think what my guy just did won't have any consequences in the future. Turns out, messing with an important figure in Gensokyo's balance can be not really good in the long run.
Tell me what you think and stuff, since I think this could need a rewrite later if it turns out to be ass. Also I'm finishing writing this at like 3 am, so yeah.
See ya later, I guess.