By the time Friday rolled around, Rose hadn't properly spoken to Dimitri all week, not for want of him trying. He'd called at least once everyday, with Rose telling him that she was busy with Lissa, or working, or any excuse under the sun that she could possibly think of. It wasn't that she didn't want to talk to him, or that she wanted to end things with him – she just didn't know how to speak to him, to explain what was going on and what she was feeling, without sounding like a complete idiot. Without crying. Without seeming like a love-sick, co-dependent, desperate stalker.

This thing between them was casual.

Yet her heart seemed to be having other ideas.

She had tried to ignore it, to repress the feelings and thoughts that had been gradually creeping in, but it was no use. Simply sleeping with him wasn't enough. She wanted, needed more. She needed to love, and be loved in return.

But that wasn't what Dimitri wanted. He wasn't capable of that, not until he could fully put his past behind him and move on. Not until he realised just how much more he deserved. He deserved to be loved, but he just couldn't see that. Tasha had destroyed any sense of self-worth he had when she ripped his heart out and served it to him for breakfast.

And so, Rose decided she needed to distance herself. At least for now. She needed time to think, to really examine how she was feeling. Which is why she hadn't returned his calls, or his texts since she stopped answering the phone two days ago. If he didn't think about her as more than just a fuck-on-tap, why was he so persistent in trying to contact her, to get her to talk to him?

Having been stuck on the sofa for practically the whole week, Rose decided that she was better than simply moping around all day. She had done this exact thing during her breakup with Mason, and it had made her depressed, cranky, lonely... She didn't want to do that again – especially when there was no real reason to! She wasn't going through a breakup this time; she was purely being stubborn.

As usual.

Rose peeled herself from the sofa with a groan and a stretch, before jumping in the shower, taking her time to wash the last few days from her body. It was surprising how gross you could feel after wearing the same pyjamas all day every day, eating nothing but junk and doing nothing but watch reruns of The Office – clearly her go-to choice when she was moping around.

Once Rose had showered, changed into some clean clothes and towel-dried her hair, she glanced at the clock beside her bed to check the time. Three thirty in the afternoon. What day was it again?

Fuck, she thought, realising it was Friday, and that she would need to face Dimitri later that evening at their usual Friday evening yoga class. Was she ready to talk to him?

Absolutely not!

Not until she worked out what to say, at least.

She did need to talk to Lissa, however. Rose had briefly told her what had been going on that week, why she was refusing to leave the house, but hadn't wanted to go into too much detail. How could she, when she didn't really know what was going on herself? Still, she needed to at least let her best friend know she wouldn't be going to yoga that night.

Grabbing her phone from where she had chucked it into her bedside table drawer, she inwardly groaned as she saw her missed notifications.

2 missed calls, 3 messages.

Two of the three texts were from Lissa. The missed calls were from Dimitri, however, and the third text was from him, being sent just five minutes ago. He was "just checking in". Choosing to ignore it for now, Rose responded to Lissa's messages, informing her that she wasn't feeling well and wouldn't be going to their usual Friday yoga class, before returning to the living room and chucking her phone aimlessly onto the coffee table.

Her stomach rumbling, informing her of the hunger she'd been ignoring all day, Rose quickly scuttled to her kitchen to make herself a snack – if you could call it that, considering all she had in her apartment was two-day-old fast-food leftovers and a random block of cheese in the fridge.

"Ugh," she sighed, vowing to go food shopping the next day before returning to the sofa to continue her Office marathon, snack-less and starving.

At four o'clock, she heard her phone vibrate again, and its screen lit up on the coffee table. Having a feeling she knew who it was from, she chose not to respond.

Four forty-five, another text. She ignored it.

Five fifteen, yet another message.

Feeling bad, she picked up her phone. He didn't deserve to be ignored, really. Especially not for a reason as menial as the simple fact that she was confused.

Roza, are you okay? His last text read.

Against her better judgement, she decided to respond, apparently feeling guilty for having left him hanging for the last couple of days.

I'm not feeling well. Won't be at yoga tonight :(

With a sigh, she switched her phone off. She replied, at least. That was the least she could do for now.

What she really needed to do was think about what to say to him, get her shit together, before talking to him. Could she tell him how she felt? She wasn't exactly sure what she felt, honestly. It had all come flooding so quickly, so unexpectedly, that her mind hadn't had the chance to properly catch up.

Later that evening, Rose was lying sprawled on the sofa, her frazzled thoughts rushing around her head for the millionth time, when the doorbell buzzed unexpectedly. Almost jumping from her skin, her heart beat heavily in her chest – she really had been lost inside her mind to have been scared by a simple buzzer. But she hadn't been expecting company, so who could blame her?

With a slightly irritated sigh, she forced herself to get up from the sofa and see who was trying to interrupt her pity party. It was an exclusive event – invite only, and only she was invited.

As she unlocked the door and opened it to reveal the party crasher, her irritation quickly changed to confusion. Staring down at her with a breath-taking smile on his face, carrying a takeout bag and two coffee cups, was the one man she was trying actively to avoid.

Dimitri.

As gorgeous as ever, Rose's breath hitched in her throat at the sight of him. How could one man be so blessed with looks as stunning as his?

"Uh... hi?" Rose finally uttered when she found her voice, not bothering to hide her surprise at his unexpected presence.

"Hi."

"What's - what are you doing here?" She questioned, desperately trying to slow her breathing. Why did he have such an effect on her when all he was doing was standing in her doorway?

"You've been ignoring me, I thought you were mad at me, but then you said you weren't feeling well so I brought you some soup. And hot chocolate," he explained with a grin, gesturing to the brown bag and drinks in his arms. "I thought maybe you were hungry. Knowing you, you probably have no food in the house. Nothing substantial, at least."

"Oh. Thank you," she acknowledged with a small smile, before relieving him of the drinks and stepping aside slightly. "Do you want to come in?"

Dimitri followed her inside, taking off his duster jacket before walking behind Rose further into her home, as she was internally trying to remember if there was anything embarrassing lying about. She hadn't expected company, and so her apartment wasn't exactly tidy! When they reached the living room, Dimitri set the takeout bags on the coffee table and looked around at where Rose lived. Having spent almost all their time together at his place, Dimitri hadn't actually been inside, only having dropped her off or picked her up from outside the building.

Making himself comfortable, he sat on the sofa and unpacked the takeout bags as Rose quickly fetched some utensils from the kitchen, before joining him where he sat. As the pair ate, they chatted idly, with Rose trying desperately to hide any hint of the fact that she had spent the last week mentally at war with herself and how she felt about the man sat just mere inches next to her.

"I have to say, Roza, you don't seem very sick," Dimitri informed her with an amused look on his face when they had finished eating.

Shit. Rose had completely forgotten that was what she told him!

"I am," she told him, adding a so-not-obvious cough on the end for good measure.

For fuck's sake Rose, you're such an idiot, she thought to herself, inwardly chastising herself at how embarrassing she was.

Knowing her unsurprisingly well, Dimitri raised an eyebrow at her, fixing her with a pointed look that told her he could see through her lie completely. She had spent the week actively ignoring him, and now she was lying to his face. He wanted answers.

"Rose."

"Okay fine," she grumbled, rolling her eyes at him, not ignoring the way his jaw locked and palm twitched slightly at her action. "I'm not sick."

"Then what's going on? Why have you been ghosting me?"

"I just didn't feel like talking to anyone," she sighed. "I wanted some time to myself."

Dimitri furrowed his brows, wondering what it was that was bothering her. He hadn't missed the way she'd been acting slightly different around him since accompanying him to Sonja's baby shower, but it seemed to have reached its peak. He could tell from the look in her eye that something was weighing on her.

"Have I done something to upset you?" He asked, turning fully towards her on the sofa.

"No."

Yes.

Looking sceptical, Dimitri opened his mouth to question her, but before he could say anything, Rose looked at him quizzically, apparently having just realised something.

"Shouldn't you be at yoga right now?" She asked him.

"I cancelled the class," he explained with a shrug, as if it was no big deal. "I wanted to make sure you were okay."

A groan escaped Rose's lips at his words, and she sunk back against the sofa defeatedly, covering her face with her hands.

"See, Dimitri, it's things like this."

"What?" he asked, one eyebrow raised, understandably confused by her words.

"You confuse me," she explained, folding her arms across her chest defensively.

The sad look hidden behind her eyes made Dimitri's heart lurch in his chest. He could tell the pair were about to get into a heavy discussion.

"I confuse you - What do you mean? Is this why you've been ignoring me?"

Sighing, Rose decided she needed to speak to him about everything she had been feeling recently. She could put it off for as long as she liked, but that wasn't going to do either of them any good. Sure, she wasn't one-hundred-percent certain about what she was thinking, what she was feeling, but maybe talking to him rationally, like an adult, would help. If she could put into words what was bothering her, maybe she could begin to fully understand it herself.

She took a deep breath.

"It just a bit much, that's all."

"What is?" he questioned.

Rose struggled to find the right words, the right explanation. She was being annoyingly vague, and she knew it.

"Come on, Rose, I can't play twenty questions here," he groaned, rubbing his face. "Something's bothering you about us and I want to know what, so I can fix it."

"Exactly that – there is no 'us', Dimitri," she stated, clear disdain in her tone of voice. "We fuck. That's it."

A look of surprise crossed Dimitri's face and he opened his mouth, unsure what to say. Thankfully, Rose continued before he had to try and fumble over his words.

"And I know that's all it'll ever be, I know that's what I agreed to, but it's just – you're so confusing. One minute you're hot and then you're cold. One minute it's like we're a real couple, in a real relationship, and then the next minute you're telling me about all the awful things Tasha did to you and how you're not worthy of being loved."

Dimitri sighed. "I'm not. Worthy."

Rose scoffed and rolled her eyes at him for what felt like the hundredth time.

"When this all started you said it was sex and nothing else," she began. "I've met your family. You let me sleep in your bed, you took me out to breakfast. You bought me this gorgeous bracelet," she added, fiddling with it as it hung on her wrist. She hadn't taken it off since he put it on her almost a week before.

"Is that what you want? A real relationship?" Dimitri asked, attempting to hide any hint of emotion from his face. He had come here just to bring her soup, to check she was okay when she was feeling ill, not to have a conversation like the one they were having.

"I don't know. I don't know what I want," she said, honestly.

Did she have feelings for him, or did she just crave a real relationship again after Mason? Did she want to fall in love with Dimitri and live happily ever after, or did she just simply want a relationship that she could understand?

"All I know is I can't keep up with you. I feel like my head is spinning in circles and I don't know whether I'm coming or going," she added.

Dimitri shook his head in disbelief, his shoulders dropping defeatedly. "I can't be in a relationship, Roza. I just can't. I'm done being hurt, and that's all that ever happens in relationships."

Rose felt sick.

"That's not true."

Dimitri closed his eyes, turning away from her, more vulnerable than he'd ever been. "If I was worthy of being with someone, of being loved, then why did she do that to me?" He questioned rhetorically, his voice coated with clear dejection. "I gave her everything and it wasn't enough. Why did I end up alone, depressed and broken hearted?"

"She didn't deserve you, Dimitri."

Dimitri laughed, not harshly, but simply for the fact that he couldn't even begin to believe her words. "That's crap, Rose."

"It's not. It's really not," Rose told him, resting a hand on his knee. "I wish you would see that."

Dimitri just shook his head. His lack of response prompted Rose to continue.

"You are worth so much more. And I know you're afraid of hurting again, but that's the last thing I want to do."

"You say that Roza, but what happens when someone better comes along? What happens when you wake up one day and realise you don't want me anymore?"

At his words, Rose grew angry. Angry at him for being so blind, angry at herself for allowing her heart to feel something for the man in front of her. Angry for constantly having to question where she stood with him.

"For fuck's sake, Dimitri!" She practically yelled, throwing her hands up in despair. "I'm pouring my heart out here but you're just not hearing it!"

"You knew what you were getting into when this started," he told her, fixing her with a look that told her he didn't appreciate her tone.

"Whatever, Dimitri," she scoffed, standing up from the sofa. "I'm going to see Lissa."

Their conversation was far from over, but Rose could see that she was getting nowhere. All she knew now was that the discussion had been premature. She needed to be away from him. And she desperately needed to talk to someone impartial. She needed to confide in her best friend. Thankfully, considering Dimitri cancelled yoga, Rose knew that Lissa would be home.

"What?" Dimitri questioned, frowning. She was walking away in the middle of their argument?

"I just need to see, Lissa," she explained. "I can't talk to you about this right now."

"Fine," Dimitri mumbled, clearly frustrated. With himself or her, he wasn't so sure. With a sigh, he turned to leave, just as Rose disappeared into her bedroom.

He all but slammed the front door behind him as he left.

Anyone else mad at Dimitri?

The next 2 chapters are going to be intense, I tell you that. Stay tuned for angst, and maybe a little bit of heartbreak... But what is a story without a little hurt, hey?

Thank you as always for your reviews! I have been so keen to get these chapters written for all of you. Be sure to keep letting me know what you think :)