Chap : 1 :
"WTF ?!"
Yami walked in to the game shop and got behind the desk. He turned around and picked up a paper cup. Next he unzipped his pants and started to pee in the cup. Joey walked in.
"Hey , Yugi ," he said , "What are you doing ?"
Yami screamed and the cup went flying in the air only to land on Joey's head.
"Yug ? ," Joey asked.
Suddenly a man in a suit walked in , handcuffed Joey and started to take him away.
"Hey , where are you taking my friend ? ," Yami asked.
"We're taking him away because he's been covered in piss ," the man said.
"But. . .oh , well ," he stated.
Next he started to look through his deck.
AT KAI-BA CORP. . .
Kai-Ba sat at his desk looking through porno magazines. He smiled as he looked at one of the pages. Next he started to unzip his pants when the door opened and a man ran in with a laptop. Kai-Ba gasped , zipped his pants and threw the magazine out the window.
OUTSIDE. . . .
A homeless man sat outside. Suddenly the magazine landed on his head and he looked at it.
"SWEET ! ," he shouted running off.
BACK AT KAI-BA CORP. . . .
Kai-Ba stared at the man and sighed. The man sat the laptop on the table and opened it.
"What's this ? ," Kai-Ba asked.
"It's your account ," the man said , "It's empty."
"WHAT ?! ," Kai-Ba shouted , "HOW CAN IT BE EMPTY ?! WHO'S FAULT IS THIS ?!"
"His ," he replied.
Kai-Ba looked up at a man with red hair and a cross shape scar on his cheek.
"Who the fuck are you ? ," Kai-Ba asked.
"Kenshin Himura ," the man replied.
"Why are you here ? ," Kai-Ba asked.
"I'm representing Adam Carlson , the author of this story ," Kenshin said.
"Why the fuck should I care ? ," he asked.
"Adam Carlson and his wife Rei Ayanami would like to meet with you ," Kenshin stated.
"When and where ? ," Kai-Ba asked.
"At the Tokyo Dome at 2:00 PM ," Kenshin said.
"Fine ," he growled getting up , "Roland , start the car."
GAME SHOP. . . .
Yami stared at his Dark Magician card and smiled. Suddenly Joey ran in.
"HEY , YUGI ! ," he shouted.
"AHHH ! ," Yami shouted , "DON'T SNEAK UP ON ME LIKE THAT ?!"
"SORRY ! ," Joey shouted.
"WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING ?! ," he shouted back.
"I DON'T KNOW ! ," Joey shouted.
Suddenly Mai ran in and looked at Joey and then fainted.
"What's up with Mai ? ," Yami asked.
"I don't know ," he replied , "Mai , are you okay ?"
Mai sat up , put on a spacesuit and tapped her ankles together.
"UP , UP AND AWAAAAAAY ! ," Mai shouted.
Next she flew through the roof of the Game Shop.
"Okay ," Yami said slowly.
ISHTAR RESIDENCE. . .
Marik Ishtar sat with Ishizu on the couch and they put their fists together. Next they closed their eyes.
"Wonder Twin powers activate ," they said.
Next they morphed in to Slifer The Sky Dragon and The Winged Dragon Of Ra. Marik got up and walked in to the bathroom.
"HOLY CRAP ! ," Marik shouted , "IT WORKED , SIS !"
"Sweet shit ," Ishizu said popping a cigarette in to her mouth and turning the television on.
GAME SHOP. . .
Yami walked back and forth behind the counter and sighed. The front door suddenly opened and Yami Bakura walked in.
"Alright , Pharaoh ," he said.
"BAKURA ! ," Yami shouted.
"It's time for you to surrender your puzzle to me ," Yami Bakura said.
"Never ," he replied.
Yami pulled out his duel disc and put it on. Yami Bakura laughed as they drew their cards.
Yami - 4000
Yami Bakura - 5000
Yami looked at his life points , then at his own and shook his head.
"Alright , wait just one minute here ," Yami said , "Something's not right."
Next he pulled out a marker and walked over to Yami Bakura. Yami Bakura watched Yami suspiciously as he marked off the 5 in his life points and wrote 1 beside it.
"There ," Yami said , "That's better."
"WHAT THE FUCK ?! ," Yami Bakura asked , "HOW THE BLOODY FUCK IS THAT BETTER ?! I'M THREE THOUSAND POINTS WEAKER THAN YOU ! YOU CALL THAT FAIR ?!"
"Yes ," he said.
"How is that fair ? ," Yami Bakura growled.
"It's fair because I'm the King Of Games , bitch ," Yami said.
"DAMN YOU ! ," he shouted.
Yami Bakura ran off crying.
ADAM'S LAIR. . .
Adam walked back and forth in his lair and sighed. He needed a new plan. Something he hadn't done yet.
"Let's see ," Adam thought , "Take candy from kids ? No. Beat up Trick Or Treaters ? No. I GOT IT ! I'll steak the Millennium Puzzle from Yugi."
A man dressed in a cloak walked in. Adam looked at him and then smiled insanely.
"I have a plan ," Adam said.
"What is it ? ," the man asked.
"I'm going to take the Millennium Puzzle from Yugi ," he said.
The man gave him a blank stare.
"What ? ," Adam asked.
"Haven't you already done that before and failed ? ," the man asked.
Adam growled and started to kick the man.
"GET OUT ! ," he shouted at the man , "OUT ! OUT ! OUT ! OUT !"
The man ran away crying.
"Soon the Millennium Puzzle with be mine ," Adam said.
Next he started laughing.
OUTSIDE ADAM'S LAIR. . .
Kai-Ba's limo pulled up to Adam's lair and stopped. Kai-Ba got out and walked up to the front door. The door opened and a man let him in. The man led him in to a room and motioned for him to sit. Kai-Ba sat down.
ADAM'S LAIR/ADAM'S OFFICE. . .
Adam sat behind his desk and the intercom buzzed. He sighed and pressed a button.
"Yes ? ," he asked.
"Mr. Kai-Ba is here , sir ," the man said.
"Tell him to fuck off ," Adam stated , "I don't want his money."
"You asked him to come , sir ," he said.
"I did ? ," Adam asked , "Send him in."
Kai-Ba got up and walked in to Adam's office. Rei was lying on Adam's desk wearing a black dress and sucking on a carrot.
"Good morning , Mr. Kai-Ba ," Rei stated.
"Hn ," Kai-Ba replied , "I thought we were meeting at the Tokyo Dome ?"
"CUT ! ," a voice shouted.
The Director walked on the set.
"Kai-Ba , why are you wearing that suit ? ," the Director shouted.
"Because I have a company to run and if I wore clothes like him ," he said pointing to Adam , "I would lose my job. No offense."
"None taken ," Adam said.
"Okay ," the Director stated , "ACTION !"
"Alright , Mr. Kai-Ba ," Adam stated , "I want you to put on this dress and announce to the whole world that you are . . . . . .A WOMAN !"
( Thunder Boombed )
"Hmmm ," Rei stated , "Strange. The forecast didn't say anything about rain today."
"May - ," Kai-Ba started.
Suddenly lightning struck him and Kai-Ba passed out. Rei looked down at Kai-Ba and then poured herself some Lemonade.
"Hmm ," Rei said , "This carrot taste's like Adam's -
"Dear ," Adam stated.
"Yes , sweetheart ? ," she asked.
"I want to play Naked Pirates ," Adam said.
"Alright ," Rei said stripping naked , "Naked Pirates it is."
Adam stripped naked as well and then picked up two swords. He tossed one to Rei and then they started sword fighting.
GAME SHOP. . . .
Yami sighed and crossed his arms. Next he looked down at the counter and then up at the door. It opened and Pegasus walked in.
"Yugi-Boy ," he said.
"Pegasus ," Yami replied.
"Guess what I found ? ," Pegasus asked.
"What ? ," he asked suspiciously.
"A GOLDEN ELEPHANT ! ," Pegasus shouted.
Suddenly a golden elephant fell out of the sky and landed on Pegasus.
"Huh ," Yami said , "There's something you don't see everyday. Golden Elephants."
Yami sighed and walked out of the shop whistling. He started to walk down the street. Then he started to walk down the street singing as he went.
"Today is the best day ever ," Yami sang , "I'm so happy today. I - SWEET MOTHER OF SHIT ! WHAT IS THAT ?!"
He ran to the side of the street and bent down to see another Dark Magician Card. He picked it up.
"Wow ," he said , "Another Dark Magician Card. Sweet shit."
Yami put the card in his deck and walked across the street whistling.
"Today's my lucky day ," Yami exclaimed.
Then a car ran him over.
ADAM'S LAIR. . . .
Kai-Ba woke up tied down to a table and was in his boxers. Adam stood over him wearing surgical scrubs and holding a scalpel.
"The patient is ready , Doctor ," Rei said seductively.
Rei was wearing a nurse's outfit.
"Excellent ," Adam stated , "Any last words before I surgically remove your soul , Mr. Kai-Ba ?"
"Meppprepepepephhhpphp ," Kai-Ba mumbled through the tape.
"What ? ," he asked , "Say that again ?"
"Meppprepepepephhhpphp ," Kai-Ba repeated.
"I'm sorry I still can't understand you ," Adam stated.
"Meppprepepepephhhpphp ," he repeated a second time.
"I didn't know you had a sister ," Adam said , "Is she hot ?"
"Meppprepepepephhhpphp ," Kai-Ba stated again.
"Hang on ," he replied.
Next he tore the tape off Kai-Ba's mouth.
"You're insane ," Kai-Ba said finally.
"What ? ," Adam asked , "I went through all the trouble of taking the tape off you mouth to learn something I already know ? Well that was stupid."
Adam put the tape back on Kai-Ba's mouth and smiled. He began to do the surgery when the doorbell rang. Adam stopped.
"Now what ? ," he asked annoyed.
He set the scalpel down and walked to the front door. Adam opened it to see a girl scout standing in front of him.
"Would you like to buy some cookies , Mister ? ," the girl asked.
"Ummmmmm. . . . .Sure ," Adam stated.
"How many ? ," she asked.
"Five boxes ," Adam replied.
"That will be ten thousand dollars ," the girl said.
"WHAT ?! ," he shouted , "TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS ?! I DON'T HAVE THAT KIND OF MONEY ! Wait. Kai-Ba does.
I can just use his credit card."
Adam pulled out Kai-Ba's credit card and gave it to the girl and then kicked her in to the air.
"GOOD RIDDANCE ! ," Adam yelled.
Next he slammed the door and walked back in to the room where Kai-Ba was being held.
END OF CHAPTER : 1.