Shantae: The Eternal Spirit Chronicles

by IllusoryNomad

Following Shantae's latest crusade against the forces of evil, a new Relic is revealed that has the power to LITERALLY change (or even DESTROY) the lives of all who come into contact with it! Added to the emergence of a rogue, vengeful half-genie, as well as the unwelcome return of a certain marauding Pirate Queen, the Half-Genie Hero and company must spring into action once again!

20. Mortal Kombination

Chapter 8: Mortal Kombination

Ay, yo! Been a hot minute since we last kicked it and had a good time, ain't it? Yeah, I know, you completely agree. We never get to chill often enough! We ought to start making plans or something… Of course, I specifically mean making plans without it necessarily involving gossiping about Shantae and her friends' totally bombastic and otherworldly adventures and escapades and such. But, I know that's what keeps you comin'… and I know that's exactly what you're here for this time as well. So, I won't waste your time babbling on about my needs in this very transactional relationship we have here. Alright, so saddle in and let's get this party started!

So, things had been relatively quiet… for a given definition of 'quiet' regarding the Sequin Land Anti-Pirate Squad, as no new leads had come up for any Spirit Fuser locations since Shantae and Rottytops's most recent visit to the site of the Crackling Crystal Castle. By this point, the Relic location in question was due to appear in a little less than a week, and our squad members were readily preparing themselves for potentially the most dangerous expedition yet. Or rather, most of them were. At least one of the defense force's members had… other obligations to fulfill before he was able to once again dedicate his efforts to acquiring the fourth Spirit Fuser fragment. What was he doing that kept him so distracted, you may ask? Well…

One peaceful afternoon, just outside of Scuttle Town's Town Hall…

"Mind explainin' t' me why exactly you made me spend a whole SEVEN HOURS with you, startin' at FIVE IN THE MORNING, Mayor?" asked an… especially annoyed Tayshan, dressed in black sneakers, black harem pants with a silver sash, a silver headband, his Inhibitor Vambraces, a white vest with a black tank top underneath… and sunglasses as he lugged two giant armfuls of bags toward the front entrance of the giant, partially damaged onion-domed building that was the political headquarters of the modest port town.

"Because, good sir, I have a VERY strict… er… 'search and procure' procedure that can only be accomplished once a month in the small hours of the morning," answered a certain short, portly, fair-skinned man wearing white harem pants with a red sash, a blue open vest, and a turban with a blue jewel embedded into it and a feather sticking out of it. I'm sure this guy needs no introduction…

"'Search an' procure?' Ma mans, we spent this ENTIRE TIME doin' your grocery shoppin' an' pickin' up your dry cleanin'!" Tayshan argued, setting the bags down at the door as carefully as he could… by which, I mean he simply dropped them from his hands with hardly a care for what was in them.

"Careful with that! There are at least five jugs of Monster Milk, three dozen Lummox Eggs, and a specially crafted Gator Steak Bento Box in there!" the wonderful and TRULY frugal Mayor Scuttlebutt warned his apparent security guard as he opened the door to the municipal building and called for other office staff to come out and carry his stuff in for him.

"Yes, yes, I know, VERY expensive things," Tayshan remarked with a sigh and shake of his head. "Speakin' o' which, you BLEW a good 60,000 gems on today's little 'search' venture today… an' I ain't even talkin' about how much you paid for me t' be at your side all mornin' long!"

"What's the issue? It's my money I spent, and you'll be walking away being paid handsomely for your services."

"I highly doubt that it's exclusively your money, but that's beside the point."

"Your point being…?"

"Without a major threat bein' present, my 'services' cost 30,000 gems PER HOUR! The price is set like that to keep people from contractin' me for jobs where I'm not actually needed. An' all things considered, I donate anything you pay me t' the Scuttle Town relief fund because o' how desperately the town needs financial support rebuildin'. Matter of fact, that's where the money you spend on my security services is SUPPOSED t' go," an even more exasperated Tayshan argued, practically steaming as he tried to get the oblivious mayor to see his point.

"Well, that's very generous of you. Although… Are you saying you don't believe you were needed today?" Scuttlebutt asked, still not understanding as he tilted his head.

"No. I'm sayin' I believe I wasn't needed by you THIS ENTIRE WEEK. An' yet, you begged an' pleaded with the Sultana to make me stick by your side for SIX WHOLE SHIFTS this week! FOR AN AVERAGE OF EIGHT HOURS PER SHIFT! We don't even have t' do the math t' know you ain't got the money for that kind o' protection, an' you're LUCKY Shantae lets you pay her just 10,000 gems for an ENTIRE MONTH to protect the city."

"Yeah, well, you're more reliable. People take one good look at you and either stand at attention or kindly move out of the way," Scuttlebutt argued back as he fanned himself with a hand, sweating profusely under the afternoon sun despite barely doing anything of note. "And you really shouldn't worry about money. You're being given your due recompense every time I contract you. Of course, it's your business what you do with it after you're paid, but my point still stands."

"Shantae's more reliable than you think she is, first of all. She carries this town on her back, an' you continue t' show her NO respect for it. Second, no I ain't bein' given my due recompense," the disgruntled security guard shot back as he crossed his arms. "Even if I wasn't donatin' every gem I get from you, you're personally in the hole 53,000. An' as if that wasn't bad on its own, this town's been bleedin' money for the last two months because you refuse t' retool the budget enough t' make the proper renovations around here."

"And what exactly are you implying?" an incredulous Mayor Scuttlebutt defied Tayshan to elaborate as he shot the wraith a scrutinizing look. At that, Tay raised a disbelieving eyebrow.

"'Implying?' Mayor, the attack that happened here almost a month ago set the town back another 20 million gems, an' hundreds o' people still don't have homes… not t' mention the THOUSANDS of others that were forced out o' here because o' previous disasters that left them homeless. An' yet, you somehow have enough money t' travel to AND buy food an' clothes from the most expensive places in Embroidery City, buy your so-called 'girlfriend' a necklace made o' diamonds dug from the mines o' Mud Bog Island, AND hire ME—who, as I will CONSTANTLY remind you—is the Sultana's MOST EXPENSIVE GUARDSMAN… to be your bodyguard every other week. Make it make sense, Scuttlebutt!"

"Wait a sec… How exactly do you know all that? Who's paying you to keep track of Scuttle Town's financial situation? Because I think I could use an accountant…" he very cluelessly propositioned, missing Tay's point entirely.

"Are you se-!?" Tay was about to explode before stopping himself in his tracks. Taking a deep breath and pinching the bridge of his nose for a second, he recollected himself before he continued. "…Okay, listen. Listen to me as HARD as you CAN. Because this will be the 37th time I've had to explain this t' you."

"Yeah, yeah, I know you're gonna tell me I can't fire Shantae to save money," Scuttlebutt presumed, only irritating Tayshan EVEN MORE.

"…What? Why are you STILL considerin' that of all things!?"

"Because she's barely in town, she doesn't show true appreciation for her role, and she's always letting things slip by the wayside! She's not consistent enough! If she was, then she'd have stopped those hooligans from making such a mess of the city three weeks ago instead of you. Seriously, I could at least get the Town Hall reinforced with the money I'd save from-!"

"STOP. YOU ARE NOT FIRING SHANTAE. AGAIN," the thoroughly aggravated wraith hotly warned as he lifted up his sunglasses to reveal his piercing golden eyes. Practically burning holes in Scuttlebutt's face, Tayshan stared him down like he was looking at Risky Boots. YIKES… I can FEEL the animosity from here…

"You can't stop me from doing that. Much as I can acknowledge that she's your wife, nepotism is strictly prohibited in the workplace. You should know that."

"Wha-!? Wife!?" Tayshan hollered his question, caught completely off-guard by the presumption. Despite this, he sighed and shook his head before continuing. "Alright, look. My relationship status with Shantae has nothin' t' do with why you shouldn't fire her. On top o' that, the woman was on VACATION. A vacation YOU approved of as long as she had somebody to stand in for her while she was gone. How is your triflin' behind gonna try an' fire her for takin' time off AND lettin' you know months in advance?"

"Dear Tayshan, it is most certainly NOT a trifling matter. It Is very serious when such a conundrum regarding the consistency of Scuttle Town's protection is presented. She should know that taking vacations in her position comes with huge risks!"

"You're missin' the point, mayor. Regardless, that's why I volunteered t' cover for her while she was away. She was in the clear. Leave that be. Oh, an' don't even get me STARTED on nepotism when half the people in your official cabinet are your COUSINS AND FRIENDS." At that, Scuttlebutt gasped before crossing his index fingers over his mouth.

"You weren't supposed to know that…!" he whispered, not wanting to make a scene. Tayshan, in response, simply rolled his eyes before moving the discussion along.

"Sure. Whatever. Anyway, I'mma need you t' drop the idea t' fire Shantae. IMMEDIATELY. It won't end well for you if you try it again."

"Yeah, well I've already put it on the table. And if you make any of your threats of gratuitous violence over the matter a reality, you'll have it marked on your record for assaulting an official, and you'll be punished to the fullest extent of the law."

"True… or, so ya think," Tay… rather ominously acknowledged with a shrug. "But then, if Shantae gets fired an' I get locked up, then you won't have either one of us t' protect you when any one o' the NUMEROUS enemies you've made over the years comes around t' finally take you out. An' trust me, that list is gettin' longer, an' LONGER, an' LONGER by the month," he further matter-of-factly warned, causing Scuttlebutt to flinch in notable fright.

"Oh. Uhh… W-well I…" the mayor uncertainly tried to interject as he heard the wraith's hypothesis.

"You should be so lucky you were charged at her pay rate at the time that other half-genie attacked the town," the guardsman continued without waiting for a complete reply from his client. "You owe Shantae a HUGE raise if you ask me, but that's a fight for another day. Aside from that, Scuttle Town would become entirely defenseless if you got rid o' her. An' even if I didn't put my hands on you for firin' her an' get locked up for it, I'd still refuse t' work with you again, no matter HOW much you promise t' pay me. An' it goes without sayin' that if Scuttle Town winds up becomin' entirely defenseless, then that would mean that YOU would become entirely defenseless," he illustrated the rest of his point, emphatically pointing a finger directly at the trembling mayor's face. "Wanna flip that coin, 'sir?' Hm?"

"…Ah… Good points. Okay, I… I won't fire Shantae," Scuttlebutt rather timidly conceded, quaking in his slippers as he considered the unwelcome prospect. "Perish the thought…"

"Glad you see it my way. But it doesn't stop there. Here's a 'friendly' word of advice, because maybe it'll save you from total disaster otherwise."

"Yeah? What do you suggest?"

"You need to STOP wastin' the town's tax money on your own personal expenses. You need to START takin' your job seriously. You ESPECIALLY need t' START funnelin' money for repairs t' the town an' beefin' up AFFORDABLE security an' healthcare while you also figure out a budget that DOESN'T have you outspendin' your own paycheck 2:1. Like, NOW. Not tomorrow, not a week from now, not some random holiday three years from now… NOW. Okay? Scuttle Town can't thrive if you continue to neglect its and its citizens' needs."

"Uh-huh. And… you're sure doing all that will help keep the town afloat?" the mayor asked as though he didn't know the importance of stabilizing his city's economy.

"Right. Another point I'll make is that the more you embezzle the town's funds for these ridiculous indulgences, the more likely it'll be that YOU'LL get caught slippin' an' locked up for it… FOREVER. Which, let's be real, is the SAFEST option you'd have at that point."

"Well, how would that be safe? Not to say I'd even be likely to go to jail, but why would that be the 'safe' place?"

"Well… If the public found out what you were doin' with their money for as long as you've been doin' it, then… in no better words, they'd riot, they'd storm into your office in droves, an' then they'd have you HANGED, DRAWN, AND QUARTERED. IMMEDIATELY." WOW… Certainly a vivid and… honestly gruesome mention there. One would have to make the townsfolk REALLY MAD to provoke them to bust out excessively brutal medieval torture methods to quell their rage… But then, I wouldn't put it past Scuttle Town's mayor to resign himself to such a terrible fate. He's quite talented at ticking people off despite him not knowing it. Matter of fact, let's keep seeing it happen in vivo…

"Wh-what? HANG me!? L-like a pinata? Because they've tried that before, but the rope couldn't support me…" the elected official responded with an obvious tinge of fear in his voice as he quivered, though it seemed he… didn't quite understand what he was just told.

"…What?" Tayshan dared to question with a cocked eyebrow and gesture of his hands, having been thrown off by such a ludicrous response.

"And I don't think drawing me is such a bad thing, as long as it isn't mean-spirited like it usually is. I like art! Quartering, though? I mean, I guess I could divide the budget into fours, but that would put the town in a worse financial position, wouldn't it?" Scuttlebutt went on to absentmindedly ask, missing the entire point once again like an archer would miss the broad side of a barn… by shooting in the OPPOSITE DIRECTION while blindfolded.

"WHA-! I-! You…! Oh… Oh, man… You are SO…! Ugh…" Tay stammered and angrily muttered as he momentarily plastered a hand to his face, evidently totally dumbfounded by Mayor Scuttlebutt's astonishing ability to listen to absolutely nothing he said. Rubbing his aching forehead as he let out the hottest of sighs, the absolutely vexed wraith found himself at his wits' end with the town's unfit commander-in-chief. "I swear, talkin' t' you is like tryin' t' melt Frostbite Island with an unplugged hair dryer…"

"Hah! Well, that's silly! Who would ever try to do something like that?" Scuttlebutt laughingly asked a literal question about a figure of speech as he tapped Tayshan on the chest and yukked it up. And… I… just… wow, WHO THE HECK LET THIS GUY BE MAYOR!? He's an imbecile! "That aside, you'd make a great personal advisor if you're interested in the position!" he continued to laughingly offer Tayshan a job I'm pretty sure he wouldn't want in a thousand years.

"…" Tayshan most loquaciously replied as he deadpanned at the inept elected official. Ooh, and it's so unfortunate he didn't have his sunglasses covering his eyes, because they were veiny and red with tightly contained rage. And at this point, I could hardly blame him. I… I'm honestly questioning if ANY amount of money was worth spending an entire day with the likes of Mayor Scuttlebutt, regardless of the context. Jeez… Yet, just as the wraith was doing his best to keep from having an aneurysm from the unadulterated, unabashed foolishness he was forced to endure, a Sequin Land guardsman came strolling toward them.

"Commander Tayshan, sir!" a Palace Guard called as he hastily approached, shifting through a crowd of townsfolk in the distance to reach the wraith.

"Oh, thank goodness… This nightmare of a shift is over…" Tay graciously murmured to himself as he turned to approach his fellow guardsman. "Alright, that should just about do it for today, mayor. See ya later. The Sultana will send you the bill in a few days' time," he further bade as he looked back and gestured a hand toward Scuttlebutt. Not bothering to wait for a reply, the ghostly guardian continued marching forward as he slid his sunglasses back over his eyes.

"E-er, yes! Yes, I'll see you later," Mayor Scuttlebutt bade back with a wave as he turned to enter the town hall. "I believe our next booking is in two weeks. I hope you're fond of kids, because my niece and her friends are having a birthday party. You'll be the bouncer. Toodles!" he informed before going into the Town Hall and shutting the door, causing Tayshan to stop in his tracks… though the wraith didn't turn back around or offer any rebuttal. Instead, he sourly looked at the ground like he was trying to shoot lasers out of his eyes through his spectacles.

"Aw, this lousy son of a…! A BOUNCER…!? For a party full o' EIGHT-YEAR OLDS…!? Gaaah, I can't STAND this fool…!" Tayshan unhappily grumbled and cursed through gritted teeth as he punched the open air in the face before doing his best to keep calm. He took the moment to breathe an exasperated sigh hot enough that you could see the steam coming out of his nostrils. "What fancy wordsmithin' did he have t' do t' get the Sultana to agree t' THAT…!?" he further asked himself, though the Palace Guard reached him before he could ponder further on the Mayor's unprecedented eloquence in making outrageous, ill-advised, not to mention PRICEY requests for his services.

"Good afternoon, sir!" the burly, armor-clad guard greeted with a salute as he stood tall… taller than Tayshan, believe it or not. By at least a few inches, no less!

"Afternoon, soldier," the undead commander greeted after breathing a heavy sigh to ease his nerves.

"I trust you enjoyed your time with Scuttle Town's mayor?"

"Yeah, like I enjoy steppin' on rusty nails while barefoot," the wraith sardonically remarked.

"…So, the usual," the guardsman acknowledged with a chuckle, evidently familiar with the unpleasant experience.

"Yep. Another ridiculous shoppin' trip he had no business takin', an' more bein' forced t' fight off common thieves an' muggers before they could get to him, so he could continue indulgin' himself with taxpayer money."

"Yikes… Soon enough, we'll have enough proof to indict him, but we need to be patient. You're doing the Sultana a huge favor," the guard asserted, which… ooh, boy, sounds like Scuttlebutt's in more trouble than he knows. At that comment, however, Tay merely nodded in acknowledgement. "That aside, it's a good thing I caught you at the end of your scheduled time with him," he further shared, piquing his commanding officer's curiosity.

"Why's that?"

"Because the Sultana sent me here to get you onto another assignment, effective immediately."

"What?" Tay questioned in shock. "What kind o' job is THAT important that she needs me t' jump on it right now? Is it… another… 'Dimensional Escort' mission?" he… quite cryptically asked, though the implications… felt quite… dark, for lack of a better word. Just gonna leave that there…

"Not… exactly? She wasn't clear on it, but she said something about getting a report of a potential ecological threat emerging from seemingly nowhere," the Palace Guard explained, only further perplexing the haloed ghost man standing before him.

"An ecological threat?"

"Indeed. A thought-to-be-extinct invasive species of monster has been spotted lurking around the Burning Zipper Volcanic Field, and no one else we've sent could properly deal with it. In fact, some of them haven't even returned from their trips over there in the past week. We fear they may not have survived."

"Hm… I see," Tay acknowledged with a solemn nod. "But why does that necessitate me t' deal with the issue instead of a conservationist or an experienced team o' bounty hunters? Is the threat that serious?"

"As far as Her Highness has described, yes. The animal is far too dangerous to be approached by regular humans and is supposedly known to be able to survive almost anywhere. It's also supposed to be an apex predator with an insatiable appetite, and its presence threatens to wipe out all other life there and destabilize its ecosystem. Worse yet, the area is too dangerous for someone not equipped enough to deal with the environmental hazards AND the extremely aggressive monsters. Even those that are, would still struggle to move quickly enough to contain the threat before the bad conditions—or the monsters—overwhelmed them. Hence, the missing and presumed dead adventurers that were previously assigned the task."

"Ah… Sounds like this is gonna be another hard one…" Tay acknowledged with a pensive sigh as he crossed his arms and mulled it over. "I feel for whoever got lost out there… With any hope, I can find them there alive."

"Indeed. There's no doubt you can handle it regardless of the circumstances, though. And my fingers are crossed for those other travelers as well. Oh, and before I forget… There's also… a bit more of a backstory on the species of monster you'd be looking for. It involves some weird, vanishing islands and some legend about an odd, long-lost artifact, and I'm not sure I've got all the details straight. Why don't we take a short trip around town while I fill you in on the mission specs?"

"Hm. That… That's interesting," he remarked with a raised eyebrow, having gotten a most specific clue about the nature of the threat he was about to begin an emergency search for. With hardly another moment of thought… "Yeah, sure. Let me know everything you have t' share."

"Will do, sir. Where should I begin?" the taller guard asked as the two men began to stroll through Scuttle Town's lively streets.

"We'll start simple. Let me know what it is I'm lookin' for, an' then explain the potential impact. I'll ask you more questions if anything sticks out."

"Sounds good. So, the first thing you should know is…" the guard commenced his explanation as the two men toured the town…

A little while later, elsewhere in Scuttle Town…

"GET AWAY FROM ME, BOLO! I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU!" shouted a particularly agitated Rottytops as she blew past the young man in question. The two were outside of Sky's Hatchery, though Sky herself was nowhere in sight.

"Rotty, wait! Please, come on! I really want to make things right between us!" Bolo pleaded as he chased after the angry zombie girl. "It's been a whole week, and Shantae said you'd be more open to hashing things out by now!"

"No, I told her I'd be more open to the idea of not beating your face in for cheating on me!" Rotty corrected as she picked up the pace, storming past groups of onlookers as they watched the debacle unfold. "Don't put words in her mouth! And you pestering me is only gonna make me change my mind back! Stop FOLLOWING me!"

"R-right, she did say that, and I shouldn't have assumed… B-but now that we're here, why don't we spend some time talking things over? I've had time to think about it after I spent the last week back in Bandit Town, and I think we could-!" he was about to further plead his case before Rotty whirled around and approached him with nothing but enmity in her every step. And as soon as she got up in his face…

"Listen. You are about TWO steps away from me getting Abner over here to beat you up. You got that?" she VERY sternly warned Bolo, having hit her limit for tolerating him pestering her.

"O-Okay, but I thought you were stronger than Abner…?" the young man hesitantly questioned, instinctively tensing up and taking an anxious step back.

"Yeah, but he's a lot less likely to hold back on you. And you'd better BELIEVE he'd tear you a new one if he…? Hm?" she was about to threaten before something caught her eye. Looking off to the side, the zombie girl spotted a certain halo-adorned man walking alongside a taller Sequin Land Palace Guard in the middle of a conversation. "Oh! Hey, stud muffin! Hey!" she excitedly called, effortlessly shoving Bolo out of the way as she focused her efforts on catching up to her ghostly roommate.

"…Haaugh. Whelp, this went about as well as I was expecting…" Bolo murmured to himself as he sighed and followed Rottytops on the way to their mutual friend. "Maybe Tay can talk some sense into her…"

"Stud muffin! Yoo-hoo~!" Rotty continued to excitedly call as she jogged ahead past a collection of food stands.

"Wha…?" Tayshan hummed as he stopped in his tracks and turned around to see his fellow S.L.A.P.S. member quickly approaching. Acknowledging it, Tay momentarily turned to the other guardsman. "Thanks for the info. Tell the Sultana I'll set out on the mission in an hour, alright?"

"Copy that, sir. Be safe out there."

"Will do. Catch ya later," Tay bade with a nod of his head, to which the other guardsman responded by standing tall and saluting him before hurrying off. And just as the ghostly adventurer turned once more to greet his equally undead companion…

"Tay-Taaaay~!" Rotty cheered as she sprung forth and jumped into his arms.

"Whoa!" Tay yelped in surprise, barely preparing himself as his zombie roommate latched onto him with a heavy *PLOUGH* of her body against his. "Ooh… Good afternoon t' you too, Rotty," he greeted her through a short chuckle as the two embraced each other… while her legs dangled in the air. In the same moment, however, Tay noticed Bolo also approaching with a lot less pep in his step. "Yo, Bolo. Been a hot minute since I've seen you."

"Y-yeah… Been a bit busy, but it's good to see you, bro," the younger man greeted, sulking a bit as he drew closer. He stopped a notable distance away from his undead companions as they continued to embrace each other, however.

"Likewise. I was actually lookin' for you, but my schedule got packed as I caught up on everything," Tay revealed, though Bolo hardly appeared surprised.

"I got the memo, don't worry."

"I see. Were… you an' Rottytops hangin' out today, though? Not t' say I ain't glad t' see it, but I—!"

"Nope. Still not talking to this brainless cheater in the slightest," Rotty quickly corrected as she remained held in Tayshan's arms. "I'll only talk to him AFTER you talk some sense into him."

"…Oh," wraith uncomfortably and hesitantly acknowledged.

"Yep. By the way, have you come up with any ideas on what we'll do together on our wonderful D-A-T-E, honey?" she rambunctiously asked, gleeful as could be as she pressed the wraith about a certain… 'hangout' they were supposed to arrange.

"Huh? What…?" Bolo muttered in surprise and… evidently a bit of hurt.

"Ah… Not quite yet, Rotty, but we'll brainstorm. Mind you, I STILL can't believe you convinced Shantae t' let you 'borrow' me as your personal escort for a day…" he remarked, evidently not to enthused about the proposition himself.

"I've got a way with words, and I was never going to go on a date with her without also getting a chance to go on a date with you! And 'personal escort' is such an unfitting term for it! As far as I'm concerned, you're my boyfriend…" she proclaimed, shocking both boys into near deafening silence as they each gawked at her.

"…Uhhh… Yo, you might wanna slo-!" Tayshan tried to protest, even more flustered as he gawked at the zombie maiden.

"…with Shantae's approval. Also, only temporarily…" the rambunctious zombie made sure to take her sweet time to correct, grinning with glee as she did so.

"…Ummmmm…" was all Tay could think to utter as he grew incredibly nervous. He emphasized this by lifting his glasses up and flicking his eyes toward Bolo multiple times to get Rotty to recognize the inappropriateness of her claim… as well as its timing. Despite seeing him gesture at the other young man with his eyes, Rotty refused to follow his gaze as she kept her eyes locked on her 'temporary boyfriend.'

"What's got you all flustered all of a sudden, stud muffin? Probably that you're just as excited to date me for a day I am to date you for a day… Ooh, I'm so PUMPED!"

"…No comment," Tay conceded, beyond flabbergasted by the tireless flirty antics of his fellow member of the undead. Absorbing the increasingly flustered, blushing look on his face as he slipped his glasses back on and stared at her, Rottytops laughed it up as she wrapped him in a quick, albeit airtight hug.

"Gosh, you're so cute!" she further showered him with endless praise, though he flinched at the mention of the word 'cute.' His face quickly shifted from one of befuddlement to one of… embarrassed, pouting ire as he puffed his cheeks up and scowled at the undead maiden. Her reaction? "Hahahah! Oops… Forgot how much you hate having such an unmanly word used on you…~" she teased as she lifted her head off his shoulder and smilingly poked his cheek with a finger. "'Handsome' is a much better fit…"

"HEY! What's the big ide-!?" Bolo tried to cut in to question, though he would be totally ignored.

"Seriously, though, you have no idea how long I've wanted a chance like this, Tay-Tay! So, don't keep a girl waiting too much longer before you come up with some ideas, alright? I really, REALLY want to spend some quality time together, just you and me!" Rotty humbly requested as she settled herself down just a bit.

"…Sure thing," the wraith… uncertainly agreed after straightening his face and shaking his head to clear his thoughts. No doubt that he was beyond bewildered by the prospect of dating Rottytops… even if only temporarily AND with Shantae's permission, however that worked.

"Yep! Anyway, I've gotta get going. I'm meeting my brothers in Oasis Town for some burgers and shakes at this new joint that just opened up."

"Oh. Yeah, don't let me keep you," Tay acknowledged as he finally set Rotty down on her feet… only for her to reel him in with a hand and give him two kisses on his cheek (one of which was much heavier and DANGEROUSLY close to his lips, mind you) while swiping his sunglasses off him.

"Mmmmpwah~!"

"Gah…!" he grunted in surprise as he registered Rotty's frigid lips on his face. And despite it being quick, each peck still sounded out with audible *pops* like tape being ripped off of paper.

"…Grrrrgh…!" Bolo quietly growled, glaring at his… er, 'ex-girlfriend' as she paid him no mind whatsoever.

"See ya when I get back, babe~!" the giddy zombie girl bade with a smiling wave as she put the wraith's sunglasses on her face.

"Most def, though I gotta say we should REALLY be rememberin' our boundaries, Rotty," he warned as he rose to a flustered stand, making no attempt to retrieve his eyewear as he blushingly brought his hand to the cheek she smooched all over. "Not t' say I don't appreciate the gesture, but let's PLEASE not get carried away."

"Aye aye, Commander Tayshan the Tenacious, sir!" Rottytops jokingly answered as she stood tall and saluted him, though she seemed to understand his point.

"Heh, you play too much…" Tay remarked with a chuckle as he reached over and patted the excitable zombie on the head. "Alright, tell Abner an' Poe I said wassup. An' try not t' lose the glasses. They look good on ya."

"I'll say it just like that! And I'm glad ya think so! I'll wear them with pride just for you. Later, darling~!" Rotty affectionately bade with a smiling wave that included her wiggling her fingers at him. Immediately afterward, she went dashing off with style into the distance to run her errand. She… of course, went on without even acknowledging Bolo as she blew by him.

"…Jeez, that girl is always wildin'…" the bemused wraith murmured with a sigh as he scratched his head. The moment passed, however, and Tay reoriented himself almost immediately. "Alright, so… uh… Hey, you okay?" he asked, quickly taking note of Bolo as the blue-haired young man stood with his fists balled up and his gaze aimed directly at the ground beneath his feet. Upon hearing his teammate's question, however…

"Of course not, dude. I'm at a total loss for what to do about her…" Bolo admitted as he softened his stance and looked up at Tayshan to reveal an expression of soul-crushing guilt.

"Right… This is exactly what I was seekin' you out for, an' this might actually be perfect timin'… provided you ain't too busy today."

"My schedule's gonna be pretty packed. Why? Because I don't know if I'm in the mood to hear anything else about Rottytops, even if my schedule permitted it."

"Well, that's too bad. I'm about t' take off on a mission in a few minutes, an' I was hopin' we could get that talk out o' the way before-!"

"I'm IN," Bolo cut him off to instinctively agree with utmost enthusiasm.

"…What? What do you mean you're 'in?'" Tay found it in himself to ask after taking a moment to register Bolo's light-speed change of heart.

"The mission. I'm in. You were gonna invite me to be your tag partner, weren't you? Especially considering this is FINALLY our chance to show off what we boys are capable of."

"Uh… What about that tight schedule o' yours?"

"Tight, schmight! This is Hero business we're talking about, and that takes priority over all else! So… You're gonna tell me you need me as your teammate today, right?" Bolo eagerly insisted. And after a moment of thought and a sudden look of realization on his face…

"…Y'know what? Yes, Bolo. Yes, I was gonna say I need you t' be my teammate," Tayshan accepted the offer.

"Awesome!" the younger man cheered as he triumphantly pumped a fist into the air. "Let me know where we're going, and I'll ride us out there on my speedboat."

"Speedboat? Didn't it catch on fire when you went with Shantae t' the Tangled Thread Temple?" Tay queried again.

"Ah! Uh, I-I didn't think you knew about… Never mind that," Bolo dismissed, clearing his throat to downplay his embarrassment over his lost vehicle. "I've got a new one. It's better and more durable than the last one. It's also fireproofed!"

"…Yeah, I'll bet, but is it foolproof?" Tay asked, chuckling a bit.

"Hardy har, bro," Bolo flatly remarked, catching the joke. "But come on. Let's get a move on and get this job done. I've been itching for some action that didn't involve drama with the girls, and this is the perfect chance for me—er, us!"

"It sure don't take a whole lot t' cheer you up, now does it?" the wraith acknowledged and asked a most rhetorical question. "Let's at least gather up some supplies an' dress for the occasion. Where we're goin', we're gonna need t' be ready."

"Sounds intense. Okay, let's get our bearings straight, and then we'll reconvene outside Shantae's lighthouse and take off from there. Sound like a plan?"

"Yep."

"Awesome. Now, let's get this show on the road!" Bolo excitedly announced, rushing off in a direction… that Tayshan didn't follow. Instead…

"Bolo," the wraith called.

"Yeah?" the other young man responded as he perked up and turned around to face his teammate.

"We're goin' the other way first," Tay politely reminded him as he gestured his thumb in the opposite direction. "We need t' gather a little bit more info about the place in question. Also, I need t' make sure you're approved t' come with me, considerin' this is an on-the-books quest we're takin'."

"Ah. Right, of course. Silly me for getting overexcited," Bolo remarked with a chuckle as he walked back toward Tayshan. "In that case, lead the way. After that, I'll go grab my boat and some supplies. And then we'll reconvene at Shantae's place. Sound good?"

"Yep. Alright, let's get rollin'."

"Sure thing," Bolo permitted, at which point the boys embarked on their trek across Scuttle Town's bustling streets to get themselves prepared…

A short while later, outside of Shantae's Lighthouse…

We rejoin one of our two main players after some time of preparation as he stood tall, patiently waiting for his travel partner to arrive with their transportation. Donning a most… dare I say, fetching ensemble consisting of black and goldenrod combat boots, black army fatigue pants with a utility belt that had a goldenrod loincloth attached to it from the front, plated chest armor of a similar goldenrod shade to his boots and loincloth, his Inhibitor Vambraces, a black turtleneck tank top underneath the armor, and a pair of black padded gloves whose padding also bore a goldenrod shade, Tayshan patiently peered over the horizon. As he watched the Sequin Land Sea's waves endlessly crashing over themselves, he appeared to be silently contemplating something as the gentle afternoon breeze rolled through the peninsula. Interestingly enough, he was also holding some sort of helmet… silver in color except for the mask part of it, which was also goldenrod. Seems that whatever mission the scar-faced, halo-adorned guardsman was given, he was absolutely ready for.

"Hm… Seekin' out an' eliminatin' or capturin' an endangered monster in the middle o' some volcanic field for the sake o' preservin' the ecosystem… How much more bizarre can a job from the Sultana get?" he pondered as he stroked his goatee with a hand. "But if my hunch is right, then this monster could possibly have some connection t' the Spirit Fuser. Or at least, the legend surroundin' it. I wonder what the odds are that this monster might be able t' share some insight… or at least be more willin' t' talk than the monsters that guarded the Phantasmagoric Forest…"

"Yo, bro!" Bolo called, riding in on his supposedly new and improved speedboat. His train of thought interrupted, Tayshan peered in his teammate's direction to spot him cruising over to the stony edge of the peninsula wearing a rather fancy new ensemble of his own. Bolo had arrived wearing a red headband with a protective metal plate on it, spiked wristbands, a black open vest with no shirt under it, red cargo shorts with a belt looped through them, fingerless red gloves, and black hiking boots. Seemed he was ready for the adventure of a lifetime as well…

"Yo. You sure ain't waste time gettin' yourself all geared up," Tay acknowledged with a grin and nod of his head. "You even got yourself a new look. Not bad!"

"Heh, thanks!" Bolo proudly accepted the compliment, rubbing the back of his head with a hand. "Gotta say, though, that look you've got going is totally awesome!"

"Ya think so?"

"Most definitely. It also… rings a few bells for me. It reminds me of the outfit a certain member of the space ninja Ichiban Clan wears in this gritty action manga I've been indulging on. It's called 'Kyller Melee.' I recommend you read it!"

"Trust me, I'm aware," Tay revealed with a grin, further cementing his status as a comics enthusiast. "Part o' this ensemble was based on Sayvrax's battle armor. Meanwhile, I can see you're dressed just like the main character, the Great Lou Krane."

"Aaaah, good eye! And good taste, to boot! How is it we haven't gotten together to talk manga yet?"

"Because any time I usually have t' gush about comics is usually exclusively dedicated t' comic binge-an'-discussion sessions with Shantae," he answered with a chuckle. "We'll have t' block out time between you an' me, for sure. That, or all three of us can make somethin' happen. In the meantime, you about ready t' set out? We'll need t' be quick about this one, an' the sooner we get it done, the better."

"I was BORN ready, dude. Hop aboard!" Bolo invited, revving up the boat to make its engine roar with a *VWROOOOOM*… which was followed by a sudden *POW* that startled Tayshan nearly stiff. Even better, the engine began to let out some wisps of either steam… or smoke as it continued to run. "Oops… Heh, that's a little bit of a misfire there."

"…An' you're SURE this thing works the way it's supposed to?" Tay wisely asked in hesitation.

"Yes, Tay, it's fine. Don't be such a scaredy cat! I've been driving these babies for eons. You can trust me!"

"It ain't your boat-handlin' skills I'm doubtin'; it's the boat itself…"

"And the boat itself is plenty reliable. Now, come on! We don't have time to waste!"

"…Whelp, here's t' hopin' we at least survive the ride…" Tay voiced his total reluctance as he shrugged and hopped onto the vessel. Within a few seconds, he sat down in the passenger seat and strapped himself in for what would potentially be a ride he'd never forget… or possibly always regret. Who knows? We like surprises around here. Anyway…

"And we're off!" Bolo announced as he set the boat in gear, turned the steering wheel, and put the pedal to the metal. And with a voluminous… suspiciously smoky *VWOOWWWWEEERRRZZZZH*, the boys were on their way to their next adventure…

A little while later as the boys rode across the ocean's waves…

Alright, so I know it's a little odd to take a peek here of all places, but bear with me. The boat ride to the boys' destination would turn out to be a long one, and… for some reason, they didn't initially do much talking along the way. In fact, much of the air between them was filled with the roar of the engine and the endless splashing and skidding of the Sequin Land Sea's salty water against the hull of the vessel. If anything, Bolo was staring straight ahead with this… incredibly bothered look on his face, pouring all of his focus on getting them where they needed to go. Tayshan, on the other hand, had been peering around, glancing at everything between various landmasses in the distance, birds and marine life flying or swimming along the surface of the sea respectively, and the clouds. After so long, however, he eventually turned his gaze toward the boat's driver. And at that point…

"…So, this ride is gonna be a hot minute. Now seems like a good time t' address a certain hot-button issue that's been hangin' over our heads," the ghostly guardsman finally spoke up to break the awkward silence.

"Ugh… Listen, I really don't want to even be thinking about that whole situation. I'd rather we just focus on the mission," Bolo rather sourly declined, not even being specific about what he wanted to avoid talking about so badly.

"We ain't gonna get nowhere by ignorin' the issue, Bolo. I can read it on your face that it's still eatin' you alive. An' if you expect Rotty t' forgive you, then you need t' figure out a way t' address it with her," Tay countered, evidently wanting to get started with hashing out an ongoing beef between the boat driver and said boat driver's zombie ex-girlfriend. At least, I think it's safe to say they're exes now…

"Thanks a bunch, dude, but don't be offended when I say it's really not your concern. Stay out of it," the younger man refused once again, taking on a tone of agitation that… in so many words, was not received well by the other party.

"Don't get smart with me, homeboy. I ain't the one," the wraith quite irritably warned, glaring at Bolo from the side of his eye.

"Ooh! Uh... M-my bad…" Bolo apologized, spooked out of his previous frustration by his teammate's stern 'suggestion.'

"Acknowledged. Anyway, this rift between the two o' y'all has been felt by this entire group, so there's no way anybody else, myself included, was gonna just let it ride out an' hope for the best. An' in case you didn't pick up on it from what she said earlier, Rotty requested that I speak t' you about it before she found herself ready to."

"…Of course, she did…" the younger man grumbled in annoyance. "So what, you're gonna tell me all about how stupid and wrong I was like Sky? Or maybe you're gonna bark at me about how I should've stayed faithful despite Rottytops treating me like trash for almost the entire time we've known each other? Because I-!"

"Bolo."

"What?"

"…Listen, all I really wanna do is get your side o' the story. No judgments, no anger, no guilt-trippin'. An' if it helps you t' ease your nerves, I can fully acknowledge that Rotty hasn't given you the fairest chance as a potential romantic partner. If anything, I've been made very aware o' how upset she's made you over the last couple months with the things she's said an' done t' you."

"Oh. I… W-well, yeah. I'm glad SOMEONE noticed and isn't immediately taking her side," the headbanded adventurer remarked with a sigh of moderate relief.

"Right. An' t' that, I'll go on an' say this situation ain't entirely your fault. She's got some stuff t' own up to as well. That much can't be ignored."

"Exactly! I-!"

"However, that would NEVER have made it okay for you t' break her heart like you did. Cheatin' on her, especially the way it happened, made her feel completely worthless. An' we already know how much she struggles t' feel like she's worth bein' paid attention to…"

"…Ah… t-true…" Bolo sorely acknowledged, sinking into himself for a moment as he recognized the potential impact his actions had on the undead maiden's fragile self-esteem.

"You know full well it is," Tay continued to scold. "Rotty might not always show it because o' the way she carries herself, but she's very sensitive."

"I get that, but that shouldn't give her a pass to get away with doing whatever she wants to people. Especially when it comes to her constantly latching onto one or two people and boxing everyone else out. That gets REALLY annoying, REALLY quickly."

"I know, I know…"

"I imagine you would. She told me you ripped into her about that exact thing when Risky Boots turned you evil," Bolo brought up, causing Tayshan to flinch in visible discomfort.

"…I… I remember…" the wraith regretfully acknowledged, momentarily casting a worried gaze out across the ocean's horizon.

"Sorry for reminding you of that, but it evidently worked," the younger man carefully continued to illustrate his point. "She's treated you like royalty ever since."

"I… I guess, but you an' I both know that ain't the entire story," Tayshan countered as he returned his gaze back to Bolo.

"Maybe not, but she still changed the way she behaved toward you after you called her out. She wouldn't DARE say anything offensive to you now because she knows you won't tolerate it."

"Sure, but you're makin' it sound like she's scared o' me…" the ghostly guardsman worriedly pointed out.

"She isn't. She admires you for standing your ground against her while still giving her a second chance when most people wouldn't," Bolo explained to Tayshan's abundant surprise.

"Admires me, eh? I don't know about all that… Who's t' say it isn't just a simple case o' her bein' respectful?" At that, Bolo raised an incredulous eyebrow at his passenger.

"Dude. Have you not been paying attention to the way she specifically treats you? Especially compared to how she treats me? To say Rotty just respects you doesn't quite cut it. If it was just respect, then she wouldn't always be so quick to try and get your attention every chance she gets, nor would she keep making passes at you that go beyond the scope of 'just joking' in anyone's eyes but hers."

"Oh. Er…" Tay stammered, though Bolo continued his rant before he could say anything.

"The only other person she treats like that is Shantae, but the major difference is that Rottytops envies her for all that she has going for her. Her genie powers, her popularity, her supposedly unrivaled beauty, her confidence, her millions of adoring fans… and especially that Shantae has you as her boyfriend."

"I had a hunch, but I didn't know it ran that deep."

"Yeah. It definitely does. With you, though, it's that Rotty's… w-well, much as it pains me to acknowledge it, Rotty… finds you… 'attractive.' She also appreciates that you treat her like you treat any of the rest of us without any room for discrimination."

"…I uh… I couldn't help but notice that…" he sheepishly acknowledged, scratching his head as his skin grew hot with momentary discomfort while he continued to look Bolo in the eye.

"Trust me, it's as uncomfortable for me to say it as it is for you to hear it," Bolo asserted with a nod. "Anyway, there might also be a factor of her being jealous of you for having Shantae's undivided attention in a way she never could without you even needing to try, but I'd just be guessing at that point… and she'd tell me I was wrong if I told that to her."

"Wow, bro… You know her a lot better than I thought you did."

"Of course, I do. Rotty and I didn't get close for no reason, nor did we spend the past few months just goofing around. I learned a lot of stuff about her… including things she hasn't even told me since we became true friends," Bolo acknowledged. "Still, you see what I'm getting at, right?"

"I do now, an' I gotta admit that you raise a fair point. But then… I… don't know if I like what's bein' implied there…"

"Join the club. And to add to the point, she doesn't show that same level of appreciation or concern toward me, or Sky, or anyone else we've associated with except you and Shantae. Yet, she STILL treats others with more consideration than she's ever treated me… even after that dumb camping trip we went on…"

"Ah… Well, that makes a LOT o' sense, now that you bring that up…"

"I don't want the friendship between Rotty and me to disappear, but I honestly don't know another way to get her to understand that her actions have an impact on people. And that sometimes, the things she says can hurt, even when she doesn't mean it. I'm so tired of having to constantly fight with her about things that even seven-year-olds can hash out in a single talk…"

"Hm… Well, I can't help but admit that that's another good point, homie. No doubt about it. An' believe me when I say we're all makin' sure nobody is uncomfortable. Or at least, we're tryin'…"

"It's part of the reason we're having this conversation, I'd bet."

"Exactly. So, I've already got the context o' the incident that started this whole beef. What I don't have, however, is your reasonin'. What were you thinkin'?"

"…I… um…" Bolo stammered, growing flustered as the conversation hit a critical point. And after a moment of tense silence…

"Whatever way you have t' put it, I really don't mind. Again, I ain't judgin'," Tay reassured, reading his friend's discomfort through and through. And after another moment of silence…

"…So, the woman in question made a move on me after she rescued me," the younger adventurer finally began to explain. "I… I was trying my hardest to refuse her offer, but she pressured me. And she kept on pressuring me, even when I told her I was in a… w-well, that I couldn't technically be counted as 'single.' She sensed my uncertainty right away, and she dug into me about my 'relationship,' guessed that I was unhappy, and then made a really good point about how Rotty doesn't respect me…"

"Okay… So, how does that wind up changin' your mind about not bein' tempted int' the encounter?"

"That didn't. The other part did…"

"Other part…?"

"Yeah. As in, the part where Rotty constantly flirts with and crosses boundaries with you and Shantae, and had completely gone back on her word to lay off once it was clear we wanted something more than friendship. Or at least, that I wanted something more than platonic friendship with her…"

"Ohhh… So, THAT'S why you two were arguin' so much about Shantae an' me…" the ghost man realized. Rather than address that point right away, however…

"…Why haven't you two put your feet down and told her to knock it off already?" Bolo dared to ask Tayshan in a sudden rush of mild anger.

"Excuse me?" Tay asked back in confusion as he prepared himself for whatever his partner had to throw at him.

"She keeps doing the things she does because she thinks it's okay to act that way," the spiky-haired young man clarified his stance. "Kissing you on the cheek on a routine basis, prioritizing hanging out with Shantae over me, butting in on yours and Shantae's dates and being invited along, her constant 'jokes' about what it would be like if she had the same kind of relationship with either of you that you and Shantae have with each other… The fact that she even lives with you on-and-off when she's in town and brags about it like she's your wife instead of Shantae… ESPECIALLY with that obnoxious display she put on earlier today…!"

"OH… Jeez… Hm… I… uh…" he stammered for a second, momentarily thrown off by the assertions. Collecting himself as best as he could, however, he ignored his discomfort and continued to address the main point of their discussion. "I… suppose Rottytops has gotten a bit… attached, when you put it that way… But I sure hope what I'm hearin' ain't you castin' blame on me and/or Shantae for the way Rotty acts toward us like we haven't tried t' set boundaries with her. An' believe me, despite recent events, we're still tryin' t' this day."

"Recent events like what?"

"Well… Without mincin' words, a sleepover the three of us had right after y'all got back from your vacation, Rotty's 'date' with Shantae last week, that AWFUL plane ride when I picked them up after they were done, where they were both on my lap the entire time… an' of course, the fact that Shantae volunteered me t' go on a second 'date' with Rotty as some sort o' consolation prize for some footrace Shantae won for an issue o' her favorite comic…" he shared, however reluctant he was to do so.

"Oh… W-well, I appreciate your honesty, though it doesn't exactly help me feel better," Bolo remarked with just a touch of bitterness in his tone as the two young men looked each other in the eye.

"Sorry… But yeah, man, I get it… This is a REALLY weird spot for us all t' be in, an' I absolutely know now that boundaries HAVE t' be set to keep this from gettin' more uncomfortable," Tayshan admitted. "The problem is that neither Shantae nor I seem t' have the right idea on how t' set or enforce the boundaries without anyone's feelings gettin' hurt. I've had this talk with Rotty so many times, an' it never sticks. Shantae has tried as well. An' every time we come up with an idea, somethin' happens that winds up pushin' the boundaries aside. I'm painfully aware by now that it's makin' things more complicated with the longer we let this keep happenin'. It won't stop us from tryin', no less."

"I see… Hm. Jeez… And here, I thought you weren't trying to set the record straight with her…"

"Trust me, we are. That said, is there somethin' else you'd suggest we do?"

"No, no… It's just… I'm sorry, bro. It's not your fault or necessarily your responsibility to teach her about boundaries. She's old enough to know better, but she won't DO better. The issue is… is that I don't understand why she doesn't just get it through her head that she can't keep pretending it's okay to squeeze herself in between you two while completely disregarding the relationship she and I tried to build… I also don't get why she doesn't seem comfortable with the idea of leaving you and Shantae alone for more than a week before she reemerges and continues on clinging to you two. It makes me feel like she was just… using me as a replacement for you the entire time if you want the honest truth," Bolo uncomfortably declared, shocking Tayshan nearly out of his wits. It was clear by the total astonishment on his face that he couldn't make heads or tails of such a loaded statement. Seeming to draw a conclusion of sorts nevertheless, Tay processed Bolo's statement as best as he could.

"…I see…" was all he could offer in the moment as his own thought train began to take off.

"I'm glad you do. So, what insight do you have about that?"

"Well… I can acknowledge that her closeness with Shantae an' me seems t' be a major player here. An' I'd be a fool not t' acknowledge the kinds o' messages her behaviors send t' you about how much she values your opinions or respects your boundaries. In addition, she needs t' learn for herself how t' respect boundaries an' not just look at them as soft little suggestions t' be ignored at her convenience. But from the way you're makin' it sound, you're approachin' it by puttin' the blame on her an' tellin' her how she's allowed t' interact with us. You an' I both know how much Rotty HATES bein' told what t' do, an' unless she's in a mind t' listen, you're basically flippin' a coin on whether she'll take your word into account or lash out at you. She's… definitely hot an' cold when it comes t' criticism. That said, you can't force her to act the way you want her to… especially not by arguin' with her every time you have a problem with somethin' she says or does."

"Yeah, but that doesn't give her-!"

"That said, bro… I can't help but sense… a twinge o' jealousy in the way you're bringin' this up t' me…"

"W-what!? Jealousy!? Don't be ridiculous!" Bolo deflected in surprise, though Tay wasn't buying it.

"If it ain't that, then what else could it possibly be? You want Rotty t' pay more attention t' you, but you feel threatened by the idea that she has other people she likes t' be around. So, you tried t' establish boundaries with her surroundin' how she treats you versus how she treats me an' Shantae, she ignored the boundaries an' kept makin' fun o' you, an' it got you upset enough that you felt like she didn't really care about you… That, or you feel like she cares more about Shantae an' me than she does about you. That sound about right?" Tay broke the entire issue down in a single statement.

"…Hmph. You didn't have to get all super analytical about it like you usually do…" the headbanded young man begrudgingly admitted with a pout.

"Thanks for the confirmation. With that bein' established, though, I still dare t' question your intentions on gettin' together with her. Whether it was your birthday or not, why shoot your shot with her if you had such strong reservations against the way she acts toward you an' how she acts toward me or Shae?"

"Because I thought that… that if maybe Rotty and I had each other, then… then maybe we'd form a close bond of our own…"

"Mind givin' me a bit more context?"

"…I'm not sure I should," Bolo hesitantly replied after taking a deep breath.

"Why?" Tay asked, pressing into him for more insight.

"Because I'm a bit wary about how you'd take it…"

"Well, unless you're gonna tell me you have a crush on Shantae an' that you were usin' Rottytops as a substitute, there ain't a thing you're gonna say that'll take me by surprise or make me upset," the wraith practically blurted out with a knowing grin.

"What!? Ew, no! Shantae's an older sister to me! You know that! I would never!" the human swiftly denied in a flustered panic, making his adventuring partner chuckle.

"I know. Just messin' with you."

"Oh, really? Heh… Some sick sense of humor you've got there, buddy… You're terrible."

"The worst," Tay joked, eliciting a small chuckle out of his friend. "Buuut since that ain't the case, what do you not wanna tell me?"

"…That I… w-well, that I… kind of… um…" Bolo stammered once again, shaken right back into a state of reluctance. Seeing this, Tay pressed him again…

"Come on, bro, spit it out. Is it really that embarrassin'?" the halo-adorned man requested to know.

"Yes. That's why I'm struggling so much to build up the nerve. You'd better not laugh when I tell you, though…"

"Ain't nothin' funny about this situation, so lay it on me."

"Right. So… I… I kind of… do envy the relationship you and Shantae have with each other…" he finally confessed.

"OH. Shoot, you still caught me by surprise… Huh… Okay…?" Tayshan remarked, blown away by the revelation.

"Yeah. I admit it. And… I'll also admit that I've been wanting a connection like what you two have, minus the whole 'Soul-Link' thing. I just thought that I was building that kind of connection with Rotty after we finally hit it off a few months back. I thought that she and I were getting closer to each other. I… I thought…"

"…that y'all had the same idea on progressin' the friendship into a relationship before either o' y'all knew what y'all actually wanted?"

"That… That's spot-on, actually," Bolo confirmed as he perked up. "How'd you know?"

"Because what you believe Shantae an' I have… ain't exactly what you might be thinkin'," Tayshan clarified as carefully as he could.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that there's a difference between bein' in love with someone… and bein' in love with the idea of bein' with someone. As in, Shantae an' I started off as friends, got t' know each other as people, an' naturally got closer to each other over time with neither of us forcin' anything t' happen between us. There… may have been a situation or two that expedited that process, but still. Neither of us has ever felt obligated to be together, nor did we ever feel entitled to each other's love an' affection."

"Uh-huh…"

"Also, Shantae an' I fell in love with each other before we started our relationship. An' we've only fallen deeper in love since we started datin' because o' how much we cherish, appreciate, an' enjoy each other's company. You an' Rottytops, from what I can gather, are still not that familiar with each other, but y'all tried t' make somethin' work anyway before y'all knew for sure y'all were right for each other. Y'all generally wanted a relationship more than y'all specifically wanted each other as partners… I ain't pretendin' t' be an expert on this, but that's my take on it. Tell me if any o' that is off the mark."

"Oooooohhhhh… Shoot, that makes WAY too much sense… Dude…" Bolo remarked, evidently having been hit with the epiphany of the century as he momentarily stared into the clouds zooming by as they continued to ride along in his boat.

"…Is… there somethin' more you'd like t' bring up?" Tay asked after a moment, snapping Bolo out of his pensive stupor. And after shaking his head to reorient himself…

"…Sorry, but I think that's as much as I feel like we need to address it," the headbanded traveler denied. "At least, at the moment, though I do want to get your opinion on something later on."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I appreciate your input and your insight, but… that point of yours about what love is has me really thinking… Mind if we change topics for now until I can process it?"

"Fair enough. Glad I could be of assistance. Last point I wanna make before we switch topics, though, is that you still owe Rottytops an apology for what you did with that Leopard Gal," the wraith explained.

"I… I know…"

"I'd bet. An' I don't just mean doin' the deed with her, either. I also mean for whatever it is you said t' her about Rotty in the lead-up t' that encounter. Without even knowin' the details, badmouthin' Rotty t' some complete stranger is a perfect way t' ensure that she will NEVER trust you again if you can't convince her you'd never do it again."

"Right…"

"I can acknowledge your frustration an' even the loneliness you might've felt in the situation, on top of acknowledgin' that there's plenty o' girls out there who don't have an issue with a casual fling that you might be interested in. But… Guy-to-Guy, you've GOT t' do better than that, Bolo. Use the brain in your head instead o' the 'brain' in your pants, especially when you know somebody's tryin' t' tempt you t' do somethin' you'll regret later. Otherwise, any pretty girl who so much as blows a kiss or winks at you will get you to do whatever they want… includin' makin' you cheat on your girlfriend." At that, Bolo winced in reflective discomfort. Looks like that statement cut deep…

"Got it…"

"Glad you do, but on the real… You CANNOT let anybody manipulate you like that again, bro. You deserve better than that, but you'll only get what you really want out of any relationship by stickin' to your principles as a guy an' lettin' those other girls know that 'No' means 'No.' An' no matter how mad you are at Rottytops, you won't get past it by doin' somethin' that makes her even more upset with you. You feel me, homie?"

"Definitely, bro."

"Good. All in all, the two o' y'all have a heavy conversation ahead o' y'all, an' a lot o' beef t' hash out. Shantae, Sky, an' I can only mediate for so long before you an' Rotty take the reins an' settle this once an' for all. That's all I'mma say on the matter unless you need another word of advice, but I'll trust that you'll make the right decisions from this point on."

"I will. Thanks for taking the time to talk to me about this without judging me, Tayshan. I… I needed this more than I thought…"

"You got it, Bolo," Tayshan acknowledged with a nod. "Now, let's focus on this mission. And… maybe we can also talk about how Lou Krane would totally get DEMOLISHED in a one-on-one fight against Sayvrax," he further remarked with a knowing grin, shocking his teammate out of his remorseful stupor.

"What!? You take that back! Lou Krane is a master in every martial art known to the Terra Realm! Sayvrax is literally just a bucket of alien bolts that happens to know some weird Castaway Globe Ninjutsu techniques! No offense if he's your favorite, but you're dead wrong on that one!" Bolo confidently proclaimed.

"Heh. Looks like someone hasn't been readin' the latest issues. Sayvrax traveled to the Terra Realm an' learned at least half of its fighting styles in preparation for a major rematch against Lou Krane an' his twin brother Kong Law. An' as of the latest issue, Sayvrax fought both of 'em at the same time to a draw before his transport device timed out an' flung him back to the Castaway Globe."

"Wait, seriously!?"

"Yep."

"Shoot, I need to catch up, then… but even still, Lou Krane is the best there is! He can't be beat!"

"So you say now, but prepare t' be disappointed when you read the latest issue. That's all I'mma say there, so I don't spoil it for you more than I already have…" he remarked with a shrug before turning to notice that the speedboat's motor had been smoking… and heavily. "Uh… Hey, is your engine alright? Why is it puffin' out all that smoke?"

"Hm?" Bolo hummed, turning around to glance at the phenomenon. And once he saw it, he… shrugged his shoulders, turned back around, and kept on driving the boat. "Ah, it's nothin'. It usually does that, but I haven't had a major issue yet…"

"…That… doesn't exactly fill me with hope that we're gonna make it to our destination without needin' t' swim the rest o' the way."

"Chillax, bro! We're fine! I promise."

"Hmmm…" the wraith worriedly grumbled as he continued to warily stare at the engine as it let out another startling *POW* like a firecracker. "Yyyyyeah, NOW I'm gettin' nervous…"

"No reason for that, Tayshan. You're in good hands. This baby will get us where we need to be, no doubt."

"My doubt ain't so much in whether we'll get there… as much as it is in if we'll get there alive."

"Of course, we will! Well… at least, I will. You're already dead."

"Ohhohohoh, you got jokes," Tayshan perceptively accused, chuckling a bit at the morbid observation.

"You'll come to find I'm full of 'em."

"More like full of 'it,' but I digress." At that, Bolo let out a hearty chuckle of his own.

"Clever, but you know I'm a man of my word. We'll get there safely. And if I'm wrong, this boat will blow up with us on it."

"PLEASE don't speak that energy into existence. Knowin' YOUR track record by now, that's what's gonna wind up happenin','" Tay frightfully remarked, instinctively gripping the edge of the boat for dear life.

"Oh, stop. You're being paranoid for no reason. Didn't take you to be one to believe in jinxes, bro."

"After the last 'jinx' that wound up havin' Shantae's ex-boyfriend kiss me on the lips right in front of all o' y'all, I'm willin' t' believe just about anything. It's worse that Shantae STILL won't let it stay in the past because of how… 'arousing' she found that incident, as well as the other incidents that caused the jinx in the first place…" Tay complained, making me absolutely curious about whatever the heck it was he was insinuating… He kissed another GUY at some point? Shantae's PREVIOUS BOYFRIEND, at that? And Shantae watched? And SHE LIKED IT!? As if things couldn't be more unusual about the relationship between the genie and the wraith…

"Ahh, right, I nearly forgot about all that…" Bolo acknowledged with an especially mirthful chuckle. "Yeah, bro, those incidents made for some AWKWARD memories. I still feel really bad for you because of how all that played out… especially considering Aashiq has basically become your biggest fan. Shoot, with the way he acts toward you, I sometimes get the impression he thinks about you at night while he… well, y'know…" the younger man crudely remarked as he gestured a fist in front of himself, shaking said fist in an ENTIRELY inappropriate manner while he grinningly wiggled his eyebrows at his passenger. At that, Tayshan shot Bolo an EXTREMELY sour scowl.

"…THIS dude right here…" the wraith murmured to himself through a thoroughly agitated sigh, rolling his eyes and shaking his head as he cast his gaze elsewhere for a moment while Bolo cracked up at the reaction he garnered. Afterward, he turned his attention back to his guffawing best friend. "YOU'RE trippin', ma mans. I did NOT need that image in my head…"

"Hahahah! My bad, dude! I'm just making an observation!" Bolo lied through his teeth… and his abundant laughter.

"…Y'know, for someone who 'feels bad' for me, you sure as heck do seem t' have a lot o' jokes loaded up, homeboy."

"Whaaa? N-no, seriously, I uh… I know you can only grant wishes for Shantae, but I'd totally wish that didn't happen to you as a favor. No matter how hilarious that incident was in hindsight… or how hilarious it is now…" Bolo very unconvincingly offered his condolences as he continued to have a laugh at his teammate's expense.

"Your sympathy, however sarcastic, is acknowledged."

"Haah, fair. Still, could that REALLY be a jinx? I just figured that was an unfortunate coincidence that led to you making Shantae's dirty boy-on-boy fantasies come true. Sucks, I know, but it is what it is," Bolo blurted out in his continued humor, revealing some VERY telling information about our Half-Genie Hero's… more 'unique' personal interests. AAANYWAAAAY, before we get in trouble with the main lady herself…

"…" Tayshan eloquently replied as he narrowed his eyes and scowled at Bolo in comical irritation, thus proving his vast and boundless sophistication when it came to handling embarrassing conversation topics.

"…Tay?" Bolo called to his teammate after being totally wowed by Tayshan's wordy statement.

"Let's just get t' this island before I wind up needin' t' give myself amnesia on purpose…" the bitter ghost humbly requested as he shifted his eyes to the waves ahead. It seemed he'd had far more than enough of their inappropriate banter.

"Hahahaaaa, I see you still haven't recovered. In that case, sure. Steppin' on it!" Bolo did Tayshan the 'favor' of concluding their conversation as he floored it. With a *VWOOOOOORRZZZH* and another smoky, gunshot-like *KAPOW*, the boys sped even further along the Sequin Land Sea's sparkling current. I… gotta say, though, that I was ALSO getting a bit nervous about the boat's rapidly deteriorating condition as they went on. Fingers crossed that they make it there safely. Speaking of which…

The rest of the way later, on the shore of the Burning Zipper Volcanic Field…

Okay! So, this is the part where our young and motivated heroes make their spectacular entry onto the new adventuring landscape. I managed to get here a little earlier than they did, so the boys should be here any mo-! OH! A massive *KRABWOOOOOOOOOM* of an explosion in the distance completely rocked the atmosphere like someone set off a bomb… in the ocean… and sent two people SOARING through the air with all the grace and speed of bricks being shot out of a cannon. And…

"AAAWAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" hollered a certain ghostly guardian, panic plastered all over his face as he tumbled and hurtled through the air toward the craggy shore of the island.

"WAAAARRARRRAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAGH!" hollered an equally certain 'genius' boat captain as he also flailed helplessly and careened through the air. As it appeared, Bolo's boat had gloriously exploded within mere yards of the duo's arrival on the Burning Zipper Volcanic Field, thus stranding them before they even got a chance to even SET FOOT on the blasted landscape. And speaking of landing…

"HOOM!" Tayshan grunted as he somersaulted in midair to reorient himself. Bracing for impact, the wraith bent his knees slightly and widened his stance as best as he could as his boots began to touch the soot-bathed rocks of the volcanic field's surface. With a *TROPH* and subsequent *SKKOOOORRRRRZH*, he managed to JUST BARELY land on his feet, sliding forth by an additional five or ten additional yards before coming to a full stop in front of a sizable bed of lovely emerald-green grass and mountain orchids. Before he could be distracted by the scenery, however, he turned to see where his friend had been. Right on cue, Bolo was sailing toward him like a rocket from a bazooka. Thinking quickly, Tayshan adjusted himself just enough to avoid being slammed into before reaching an arm out to catch Bolo by the arm midflight with a *TWAP* of his hand on his teammate's limb.

"WOHAGH!" Bolo grunted, jarred by the sudden inertia that came with his one-way trip to Faceplant City being halted before he reached his presumably foul-tasting destination. Coming to within seconds, however, the younger man peered around the partly cloudy, modestly vegetated atmosphere to make sense of what was happening. He wouldn't get to do much sightseeing right away before…

"Bolo," Tayshan plainly called, still holding the other boy in midair by his wrist.

"Hm?" the boat captain in question hummed as he dangled in his teammate's grasp.

"…Seriously?" the wraith rhetorically (and flatly) asked in a word, his face showing anything but amusement at the situation.

"Seriously… what?"

"Seriously, your boat! Why the heck did it EXPLODE with us on it?" Tay demanded to know in just a few more words.

"Ah, um… Because you spoke the energy into existence and jinxed it?" Bolo 'joked' with most impeccable timing following their presumably traumatic experience of nearly being blown to bits by a malfunctioning seacraft.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure YOU did that, not me. Now, try an actually serious answer this time," Tay demanded, still far from amused by his partner's unhelpful response.

"I-I honestly don't know!" Bolo nervously pleaded, suddenly growing a bit sweaty as he shot his embarrassed gaze all over the place to avoid eye contact. "Um… P-probably something to do with the engine? Maybe it was my fireproofing method…"

"An' that fireproofin' method was…?"

"Pouring flame-deterrent Lummox Spit Solution into the impellers." At that, Tayshan raised an eyebrow in stark incredulity.

"Uh-huh… I thought speedboats generally had their own coolin' systems that relied on cyclin' an' filterin' water through the engine. That should've been fine on its own."

"Yeah, but the engine was custom-made by yours truly, and a conventional filtration system made the last boat prone to overheating to the point of bursting into flames. I had to improvise."

"By makin' it more complicated? A boat engine that works shouldn't need any extra steps. An' even then, the boat was sputterin', smokin,' shootin' sparks, an' poppin' all over the place the entire way here like it was gonna overheat anyway."

"Eh… Probably because the Lummox Spit Solution got mixed in with the water being filtered through the engine, which… in hindsight, probably gummed up the works. Also probably doesn't help that I forgot to install an exhaust port, now that I remember. Maybe that's why all that foul-smelling smoke kept puffing out of the motor…" Bolo theorized, making me wonder how he could EVER have survived for as long as he had to even be IN this situation… It seemed Tay felt much the same way, as he silently gawked at the younger man in an attempt to understand what he was just told. And after a rather uncomfortably tense moment, complete with Bolo shooting him a nervous grin…

"…Okay…" Tay tried once more to make sense of the ordeal, though he was quick to shake his head and sigh before moving on. "Sure, let's go with that. That still doesn't explain why the boat exploded like somebody jammed a live grenade in it, though. Did you have your spare gas tanks sittin' next t' the overheated motor or somethin'? I couldn't help but notice the five yellow containers full o' liquid strapped up against it…"

"…Uhhhh… S-so you MAY not like the answer I have for that…" the younger adventurer sheepishly admitted. Good lord…

"…Aw, jeez… I knew we should've just flown here…" Tayshan groaned as he finally set Bolo down and rubbed his aching forehead in visible frustration. "What the HECK, man!?" he further shouted as he threw his arms up in the air to emphasize his annoyance.

"My bad… I guess I might need to go back to the drawing board on designing the perfect seacraft."

"That sounds like a solid idea. An' one you may need t' spend A LOT more time on, at that. Of course, that's gonna have t' wait until after we complete this mission. We're stuck here otherwise…" he lamented as he took the moment to reorient and dust himself off. Soon afterward, the boys peered ahead to get an idea of what they'd be in for regarding their hunt… and judging by the collective surprise on their faces, it appeared they'd have their work cut out for them.

"Man… This place looks so exotic and lively… and yet, there's hardly an animal in sight," Bolo was the first to point out. "All these fancy flowers scattered about in giant patches despite there being other areas entirely uncovered by anything but soot from all the mini volcanoes surrounding the area…"

"…Not t' mention the rainbow-colored magma flowin' from all directions like a river o' birthday-themed molten rock…" Tayshan additionally acknowledged as he pulled his dreadlocks into a ponytail and slipped it through a tiny hole in the back piece of his helmet to secure it to his head. Following this, he attached the golden facemask to the rest of the helmet and flipped on a black-tinted visor attached to it. "The platforms an' all the soot risin' up from the volcanoes ain't gonna do us many favors either…"

"Whoa… Dude, that mask looks awesome!" Bolo praised as he took in the appearance of the golden-garbed wraith. "It completes the look!"

"Thanks. It's also designed t' filter out any foreign substances in the air. You don't wanna be breathin' this soot in too much or for too long," Tay advised, adjusting his mask for comfort. "You'll wind up with a case of-!"

"Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis?" Bolo… guessed…? Wait, what? Is that even a WORD!? And if it is, then what the heck does it mean!?

"Yep. Good pronunciation, too!" Tay praised, thus confirming he ALSO knew about this word that I swear the two of them just made up. "It ain't made up. It's a real lung disease you can get from inhalin' too much fine dust, ash, or sand. Specifically, silica dust from volcanoes. It can really mess you up if you ain't careful. Look it up if you don't believe me," he explained directly to me… which… O-okay, I uh… huh…

"You tell 'em," Bolo cheered at my expense, making me just a TAD sour about not initially knowing about this… pneumo-choleric-silly-ultra-Connie-oasis disease… At Bolo's comment nevertheless, Tayshan simply nodded.

"You got a mask on you?" the wraith asked, changing the subject back.

"Yep. Putting it on now," the younger adventurer affirmed as he pulled out a mask with two giant filters on either side of it and strapped it to his face. "Alright. You ready to roll?"

"As always," Tay affirmed as he entered his battle pose. Taking this as a sign to get ready himself, Bolo pulled out his iconic Morning Star and entered his own battle pose juxtaposed to his teammate.

"That's the spirit!" the handyman cheered as he pumped himself up for their quest.

"Heh… Another ghost pun out o' you?"

"Like I said, I'm full of 'em!"

"Well then at least save your best ones for the right time," Tay sagely advised.

"Hah, sure thing. Alright, I'll take the lead to start things off. Hope you don't mind being my sidekick once again, Tayshan."

"Eh, why not?" the ghostly warrior… agreed? Interesting… "I ain't opposed to it, an' I think I've gotten pretty good at playin' the supportin' role. Let me know when you need me t' take point, though."

"Will do. Okay, on my mark…"

"Go for it, homie."

"GO, TEAM THUNDER-SPIKE!" Bolo announced, thus commencing their mission.

"HOT ON THE TRAIL!" Tayshan declared with a convenient pun right after his teammate as the two young men raced ahead with Bolo taking point as they agreed. "Team Thunder-Spike, though?"

"Yeah! My Pike Balls, your fancy electric ghost moves, and our unbeatable teamwork… It's the perfect name!"

"Heh… Can't argue with that logic."

"Glad we agree. On that note, look sharp. We're already approaching the first of many obstacles…" Bolo advised as the two sprinted past absolutely gorgeous beds of exotic flowers such as bird of passions, silverswords, passionflowers, and mountain orchids scattered around patches of untapped soil. The two would immediately be introduced to the sweltering heat of the Burning Zipper Volcanic Field as they approached a massive lake of lava that… as they described, shifted between every color on the spectrum. What grabbed their attention more, however, was the zig-zagged row of floating stone hooks above… and the ashen square platforms below that moved from side to side within the lava lake.

"Well, shoot. We're gonna need t' be quick an' coordinated about this, or else we'll be overwhelmed by this ridiculous heat…" Tayshan was quick to point out. "Doesn't look like the hooks or the platforms are gonna hold for long once we use 'em, either…"

"Nothing we haven't handled before. We'll go at the same time, with me taking the high route while you take the low one. I hope you're still confident in your jumping ability, even without your old Propeller Boots."

"I should be okay, but it remains t' be seen. Either way, let's not waste time. Go ahead an' swing your way across. I'll meet you on the other end."

"Copy," Bolo acknowledged as he unfurled his Morning Star and began whirling it at his side. And with a mighty *WHOORSH* and resultant clinking of the chain links, Bolo extended the chained flail to the point where it reached up toward the first of many floating rings with a definitive *CLANK*. "WOOH! YEAH!" the agile young trapeze artist cheered as he swung from ring to ring with *CLAK* after *KRANG*, paying no mind to the fact that the rings disintegrated within a second of his mace connecting to them.

Meanwhile, Tayshan got a sprinting start before leaping high and far off the ledge and into the lava pit. He landed with a *PATOOM* of his boots against the ashy surface of the first moving platform. Almost immediately after he landed on the platform, and with a startling *KRKAKKRRRRRUMBLE*, the platform began to break apart and sink into the lava as it began to rapidly flash a multitude of mesmerizing colors. Moving with a mixture of precision and speed, the two young men flung and hopped their way across the sizable lava chasm with little issue… or rather, Bolo experienced little issue as he safely flung himself from the final hook and landed on solid ground. Just as Tayshan landed on a particularly large, craggy platform…

"GWOOOOH! GWOOOOOOOOAAAAAARRRRRRGH!" a thunderous, gravelly roar pierced the air from beneath the lava, causing a massive, boiling rush of bubbles to come popping up all over the place.

"DWOAHAH!" Tay bellowed, nearly losing his balance as the 'platform' quickly rose out of the lava lake to reveal that it was instead some form of molten rock golem shaped like a particularly vicious reptile.

"WHOA! Tay, get down from there!" Bolo shouted the obvious course of action as he watched the enormous creature rise to a stand as his teammate did his best to keep his balance on what appeared to be the creature's snout.

"…Startin' off REAL strong this time…" Tay muttered as he raised a hand and charged a supply of crackling magic into it. Before launching an attack at it, however… "Hey, I don't suppose you talk or understand human speech at all, right?" he… rather bizarrely asked the monster as its frightening glowing purple eyes opened and glared directly at him.

"WRRRROOOOAAAAAAAARH!" the lava monster roared again as it reached up with one of its giant, scaly, claw-laden arms to swat the perceived intruder off of it.

"I guess not. HRAAH!" Tay acknowledged and grunted as he leapt forward to dodge the *ZHWOOORSH* of a claw swipe from the lava monster. Thinking quickly, the undead huntsman sprinted forward, hopping on top of the monster's cranium before taking a massive leap of faith off of it and onto the ground where Bolo was anxiously waiting for him. The monster quickly turned around to spot the halo-adorned adventurer on his way down.

"RAAAAAAARGH!" the beast roared, letting loose flickers of flames as it opened its gaping, toothy maw and attempted to lunge forward to eat its prey in one bite.

"I got somethin' for you t' eat! SPECTER FLASH!" Tay hurriedly shouted as he took aim with his magic-charged hand and fired his attack with a glorious, crackling *BWEEERSH* as he descended toward the ground. The blast hit its mark with a startling *PAKWOOOORSH* right in the monster's mouth that sent it stumbling back to the point where it fell into the lava pit with a resounding *BWABLOOOOORSH* that sent spackles of prismatic magma splashing in all directions. In that same moment, Tay landed safely on the ground next to Bolo. Immediately afterward, the two of them took off running up the vegetation-rich, volcano-laden hill.

"Wow… That was impressive! 'Specter Flash,' huh? Awesome name! When'd ya pick that one up?" Bolo asked as they moved along.

"A few months ago while you were on that campin' trip. I figured it out after Shantae taught me the basics o' how t' control an' use magic for self-defense," Tayshan explained as they kept on running. "I'll go into more detail later, because we've still got a LOT o' trouble up ahead," he further shared and advised, making note of the obstacles waiting for them. And from the look of it, they were IN for it, as they quickly approached a narrow, harshly zigzagging bridge absolutely SURROUNDED by rainbow lava for miles upon miles with naught but more hooks and rock platforms to serve as alternative means of transport.

"Oh, man… We only JUST got here, and it's already looking like this'll be the hardest mission yet."

"Still ain't nothin' Team Thunder-Spike can't handle," Tay offered his vote of confidence despite being painfully aware of the dangers ahead. "You got any new moves I should be aware of?"

"I do, but I'm more the kind of guy to show rather than tell. Pay close attention when I get a chance to show 'em off, bro."

"Behind this mask, my eyes are peeled." And with that, Team Thunder-Spike pressed on. The first of many obstacles revealed itself as soon as they set foot on the narrow, crumbling pathway. With a series of goopy, sizzling *PLOOORSHes*, a band of bat-winged rock goblins came soaring up from within the confines of the lava ocean, screeching like nails on chalkboards as they quickly committed themselves to circling around our heroic duo. As they did so, their blazing orange eyes began to glow, followed by one of them shooting a *PREEEERSH* of a piping hot laser beam at their shared adversaries.

"WOHAH!" Bolo hollered, narrowly hopping over the incoming projectile as it struck the stony pathway and penetrated it with a scorching *TISSSSSSH*. "Gotta take these things out quickly…" he urged himself as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a handful of tiny red Pike Balls.

"YAH!" Tayshan also shouted as he was targeted by a second *PREEERSH* of a hot laser. Rather than dodge it, however, the armor-clad wraith blocked it with his Inhibitor Vambrace. With a jarring *KATRING*, he managed to deflect the beam upward. He followed up by blocking another shot with his other vambrace as it came zipping toward him from the other side. Another *TATWING* rang out as he deflected the laser blast back toward the rock goblin that fired it. The goblin was able to avoid the reflected attack as it and its friends continued to surround the two men while they sprinted across the first part of the zigzag path. "Shoot… Okay, I've got an idea on how t'-!"

"Don't worry, I've got this," Bolo cut in to assure as he flung four Homing Pikes into the air. Within a second, each of the pointy red spheres altered their trajectory and shot straight for their intended targets. With a series of *POPs* and *POWs*, the Homing Pikes did their thing in exploding each of the miniature flying gargoyles into pebbly chunks. "Alright!"

"Good work, but we ain't in the clear yet…" Tay warned as he spotted a larger creature emerging from the lava just ahead at the corner of the first turn. With another *KABLORBOBLORGH*, a much larger magma golem arose from its molten home to pose a threat.

"BLOOAOAAARRRRGH!" the creature, a rock-borne tiger-like monstrosity, roared as its glowing green eyes immediately locked their sights on the pair of humans barely managing to keep their balance and their cool on the extremely hot walkway. Opening its mouth, the stone tiger monster dipped its face into the lava with a steaming *SHRISSSSSSSH*, coming back up a second later with a mouthful of lava. The tiger wasted no time spitting a FOUNTAIN of rainbow lava directly at the unsuspecting travelers with the intent to melt them AND the pathway into nothing.

"AW, JEEZ! WE'RE ABOUT TO-!" Bolo was about to warn in total panic as he registered the impending threat.

"Watch out!" Tayshan warned, rushing in front of Bolo while taking off one of his Inhibitor Vambraces. In doing so, his unbound arm surged with a crackling *WHOOORSH* of purple and blue electricity. And with his magic-charged arm stretched behind him... "SHOORRAAAAAAAH!" he shouted at the top of his lungs as he swung his arm upward, drumming up an utterly SUFFOCATING rush of hot wind with an astonishing *FWOOOOOOOOORRRSH*. The wind gust seemed powerful enough to rival that of the most VICIOUS gale imaginable as it blew almost every ounce of the incoming lava bomb back toward the rock monster that launched it at them. With a burning *SKISSSSSH*, the tiger monster was drenched in the extremely dangerous, yet visually appealing fluid. The tiger did not go down to this counterattack, however, instead being forced to stumble back in surprise as some of the lava got into its eyes. Meanwhile, whatever portion of the lava spit wasn't caught up in the wind gust landed on the bridge, melting and crumbling enough of it away that improvisation became ABSOLUTELY necessary.

"Whoa…! Bro, how did you-!?"

"Grgh…! Tell ya in a second," the wraith interrupted with a noticeable wince as he put the Inhibitor Vambrace back on. "That tiger thing ain't done yet, an' we need t' split off t' get t' the next part o' this bridge an' possibly figure out a way t' take it down!" Tayshan warned as he pulled Bolo along by his hand to the end of the path. There, they were greeted by three floating stone rings on one side… and three stone platforms floating in the lava on the other side.

"Ah… Alright, I… I think I can handle this," Bolo offered his vote of confidence in his abilities.

"Handle it quick before the rock tiger goes back on the attack!" Tay urged as he hurriedly hopped onto the first of five moving, floating, EXTREMELY fragile stone platforms down below.

"Got it. In that case…" Bolo trailed off as he began to whirl his chain mace in one hand while pulling out another handful of miniature yellow Pike Balls. "I only hope five of these Sticky Pikes will do the trick… I want to save my super special Pikes for if and when we need 'em…" he murmured to himself before turning to fling all five of the adhesive projectiles at the tiger golem while it was preoccupied clearing its vision. Soon after, he launched his Morning Star's mace toward the first of three hooks. With a *KLANG*, he hooked his weapon onto it and leapt off the crumbling bridge to swing himself past the tiger. He repeated the process two more times with *KRANG* after *KRANG*, swinging himself across to the second part of the zigzag bridge with relative ease. "Hah! Not too bad…" he remarked with a sigh of relief as Tayshan hopped aboard the second bridge portion with a *PLOOMPH* of his boots against the stony surface.

"Whew… Man, those platforms DO NOT give you a lot o' time t' work with…" he pointed out as he caught his breath.

"No kidding. These floating hooks are no better. Of course, we've still got company," Bolo concurred as the two of them took note of the rock tiger monster reorienting itself and turning to spot the boys once again. Just as it made a move to pursue them, however… "Alright, NOW!" he announced as he pulled out a remote detonator and quickly pressed the button on it. And with a series of simultaneous *KRABOOOMs*, the Sticky Pikes exploded on the rocky behemoth. They seemed to be mostly ineffectual, however, as the tiger golem tanked them with relative ease and charged ahead. "Oh, shoot! My Sticky Pikes didn't-!"

"I'll finish it!" Tayshan volunteered as he took point once more, his arms flowing with Light Magic as he struck a readied stance with his hands extended forth. "DOUBLE GEIST BULLET!" he shouted, hurriedly charging two sizable spheres of electricity-borne magic into his hands and firing them off with a simultaneous *KAPWOOOAWOAAAAARRRSH* at the tiger golem. Within a second, and with an astounding *KRAKAPAWOOOOOORRRSHH*, the tiger golem was blown into chunks of sedimentary rocks that went scattering in all directions as they rained into the lava beneath them.

"Wha…!? N-no way…!" Bolo remarked, beyond astonished by the surprise light show he bore witness to.

"Hah…! Thankfully, that didn't take too much effort from us. Come on, let's keep the pace up," Tay urged Bolo as he nudged him on the shoulder.

"Oh! Ah… Y-yeah, sure thing," Bolo agreed as he took the lead once again. With that, the boys continued traversing the increasingly hazardous Burning Zipper Bridge as they sprinted along to try and get to the next part. As one might expect, more of the tiny rock goblins came rocketing out of the neon-colored lava to stage another aerial counterattack. This time, however, they came in addition to a few Magma Ants resting comfortably on another series of floating rock platforms.

"Hm? What the heck are those giant ants?" Tay pondered as he followed close behind his teammate. Bolo, recognizing the imminent threat right away, nearly froze in place at the sight of them.

"Magma Ants…!" the headbanded warrior informed with no small amount of anticipatory dread in his tone as he hurriedly pulled out more of his Homing Pikes.

"Magma Ants? What are-? WHOOH!" the wraith tried to ask before stopping mid-sentence to narrowly dodge a laser beam from one of the tiny rock goblins that rang out with another piping hot *PREEERSH*.

"They're giant ants from the Cyclic Season Island that spit lava-like goop that looks just like the stuff we're trying to avoid taking a bath in right now!" Bolo explained as his Homing Pikes managed to eliminate the flying lava goblins before they were able to fire another laser at them. Their troubles would only be exacerbated, however, when the Magma Ants in question began hocking their scalding lava loogies (gross) at them from their safe spots. 'They've already started! We've gotta move!"

"Heard!" Tay acknowledged as the two of them picked up the pace even more while being extremely mindful to keep their balance. It wouldn't take long, however, before the presence of the Magma Ants truly became a burden. With *SPLAKISSSSSSSHHH* after *PLOOORRIISSSSSSSH*, the insectoid mutants struck the already flimsy bridge and almost instantly melted away huge chunks of it as Team Thunder-Spike were rushing across.

"Aw, no…! Looks like we're gonna need to adapt! I'll swing on the hooks to get across!" Bolo suggested as he also pulled out another set of Homing Pikes and flung them toward the offending creatures. Soon after, he engaged his Morning Star and aimed toward a hook he spotted hanging just a few yards ahead and above. "YAH!" he shouted as he launched the flail ahead to connect it to the first of another series of six consecutive stone rings. His Homing Pikes zoomed in toward their intended targets as he swung across the gap ring by ring, though they would find themselves either dodged or melted with a sizzling *SKRISSSH* of a lava spit blast aimed at them.

"Alright. In that case…!" Tayshan trailed off as he charged a supply of magic into two fingers on one hand and took an ENORMOUS leap of faith to cross the gap created by the Magma Ants' lava spit. Barely avoiding another wad of insect lava hurtling toward him as he somersaulted over the gap in the path, the wraith managed to stick his landing with another *PWOOMPH* of his boots on the crumbling platform. Immediately following this, he turned his attention toward one of the Magma Ants, aimed his glowing, magic-charged fingers at it, and… "SNIPER'S JUDGMENT!" he announced as he fired his attack with a piercing *TWEEERSCH*. Almost instantly, the high-pressure magic beam collided with its target, EXPLODING the unsuspecting bug with a massive, squelching *KAKLOORSCHK* that sent neon-colored ant goo splattering all over the platform the creature once rested on. Hardly bothered one way or the other, the ghostly guardian sprinted forth to the other end of the broken platform and jumped across to the third of four increasingly narrow sections of the zigzagging stone bridge.

"Huh… He's… He's better than I thought…" Bolo observed as he propelled himself from the fourth floating ring to the fifth while keeping an eye on his teammate. Meanwhile, said teammate found himself challenged by another pair of Magma Ants and a second tiger golem that emerged with a *BAPLOOOORRRRSSH* at the far end of the bridge section. "Oh, shoot! Tay, hang on! I'm-!"

"HWAARAAAH!" Tay shouted as he leapt over an incoming magma-borne projectile from one of the Magma Ants and fired a *BWEEEERSH* of a Specter Flash directly at the tiger golem. Just as the tiger golem was scooping up lava from the lake to spit at him, its face was met with a devastating *KRABWOOOOORPH* of an explosion that sent it stumbling back as it splashed rainbow-hued lava all over the place. He quickly followed up by shooting another *TWEEEERSCH* of a Sniper's Judgment at one of the Magma Ants while he was sprinting across the bridge toward the recovering tiger golem. Sure enough, he hit the mark with another bombastic *KRASPLOOWARSCH* of the Magma Ant being totally vaporized in a single shot. He would find his progress halted, however, as the other Magma Ant fired its shot… directly at Bolo while the younger man was swinging his way toward the sixth and final hook. "BOLO!" he yelled to his teammate as he whirled around and ran back toward the beginning of the bridge segment.

"Wha!? AW, NO! WAAHAAH!" the blue-haired handyman hollered in surprise as he hurriedly switched strategies midair… by rapidly twirling his Morning Star above his head to simulate the propellers of a helicopter. And it WORKED! Momentarily suspending himself in midair with just his own arm strength, Bolo narrowly avoided being swathed in a thousand-degree coat of Magma Ant saliva. However… "Hrrgh…! Shoot…! That ant melted the last ring…!? Now what…?"

"Hey! Aim for my halo!" Tayshan offered as he stood as close to the edge as he could.

"What? Are you sure, dude?" Bolo somehow took the time to ask despite it becoming increasingly evident he was running out of strength… and fast. "I don't want to wind up clocking y-!"

"Just hurry up an' do it before you fall! You're a sittin' duck up there!" Tay urged, leaning his head forth to give Bolo the easiest shot possible.

"Ah… No choice, then. Here goes…! HAAH!" the headbanded warrior acquiesced as he immediately flung his mace at his partner's ethereal death marker. Surprisingly enough, and with a most melodic, metallic *TWIIIIING*, Bolo's mace actually managed to snag onto it! Rather than swing over to safety, however, Bolo hurriedly activated a feature on his weapon that caused the chain links to retract. As such, he pulled himself over to his teammate, who secured him before unhooking the Pike Ball at the end from his halo. "Thanks for the save, bro! Never thought that thing would have a functional use…"

"It has a few uses, though I rarely get a chance t' show what it can do. Stay sharp, though, because we still have a bit t' go before we hit solid ground again…" Tay warned as he and Bolo got back on track traversing the remainder of this awful bridge. And right in tune with the warning, the remaining Magma Ant and the tiger golem went on a simultaneous offensive. The tiger golem leapt high into the air, splashing lava everywhere as it planned on crushing its enemies under its presumably IMMEASURABLE weight. Meanwhile, the Magma Ant prepared to spit another glob of its own scorching hot secretions at them.

"…Oh, boy…!" Bolo lamented as he tensed up and braced for impact.

"You have GOT t' be…! Darn it, I was hopin' I didn't have t' do this…! Bolo, use your Pikes t' dispatch the ant! I'll deal with the tiger!"

"You got it!" Bolo obliged, pulling out a blue Pike Ball and flinging it as hard as he could at the Magma Ant. He managed to land the projectile on the platform the Magma Ant was situated on, at which point the Stun Pike went off with a startling *KAPOW* just as the insect fired off its spit blast. "Score! You might wanna watch your step, though, Tay! It still fired a shot at us!" he warned. "What do you plan to…?" he was about to ask as he pulled out a yellow Pike Ball from his pocket. Rather than throw it at the distracted Magma Ant right away, however, he turned around to see Tayshan taking off one of his Inhibitor Vambraces once again. This time, the wraith's arm surged with a crackling *KAFWOOOORRSH* of Dual Magic as he tensed up his hand. In no time flat, a truly mesmerizing *VOWAAAAAARRSCH* of a magic attack manifested in the form of a wrecking ball-sized, blindingly bright purple energy ball that caught Bolo by total surprise.

"WHOA…!" Bolo murmured in awe as he took in the unfathomable sight. Meanwhile, Tayshan aimed his arm upward as the tiger golem descended upon them.

"BANISHMENT BLAST!" the masked wraith shouted as he launched his attack. And with quite possibly the loudest, most extravagant crackling *KRAKABWEEEERRRRROOOOSH* I'd ever heard, he fired off a literal PILLAR of swirling purple light that looked like it would pierce the clouds above them! Nevertheless, the blast found its mark within half a second of it being fired. And with an equally eardrum-shattering *TWABWOOOOMBOMBLOMMMMB*, the belly-flopping tiger golem was completely OBLITERATED. Chunks of the rocky creature rained all over the place as its body went up in a glorious, electricity-riddled cloud of ash and smoke, thereby confirming the relative safety of Team Thunder-Spike.

"No flippin' WAY…!" Bolo remarked, evidently astounded by the event of the tiger golem's destruction as he eventually turned his gaze from the smoke cloud to his teammate. "Dude…!"

"Ghaaaahaaagh…!" Tayshan groaned in a sudden burst of agony as he barely remained steady on his feet. His arm fell to his side as it momentarily crackled with bolts of electricity before he hurriedly put the Inhibitor Vambrace back on.

"Whoa! H-hey, are you alright?" the younger man asked, getting ready to provide assistance if necessary.

"I'm good…! Just… overdid it a little bit," the undead guardian dismissed, rising to a capable stand once again as he shook off the residual pain surging through his arm. "Thankfully, that blast did the trick. Did… Did you take care o' that Magma Ant?"

"Uh… Oh, no! Shoot, m-my bad!" the shorter adventurer realized in a panic as he whirled around to see that part of the bridge they were standing on had been melted through by the Magma Ant's saliva. Worse yet, the Magma Ant had recovered from the surprise Stun Pike attack and aimed its next shot at the final bridge section up ahead… "Crud! If that thing melts that last bridge, we're done for!"

"Darn it…! An' I won't have enough time t' charge up a Sniper's Judgment…!" Tay further lamented as he tried to come up with an idea. Within a second, however… "Bolo."

"Yeah?"

"Hand me one o' them Pike Balls. Whichever one will make the biggest boom…"

"Oh! Uh, yeah, hang on…" he requested as he hurriedly dug into his pocket and pulled out an especially large orange Pike Ball, roughly the size of an apple, to hand to his teammate.

"Hm? What's this?" Tay asked as he got Strange Pike Ball.

"Throw it at that ant and find out. Make it quick, too, because we're almost out of time!"

"Got it… Hrrrrrrrraaah…!" Tay acknowledged and hummed as he prepped himself. Widening his stance, he stretched one arm forth while cocking the hand in which he was holding the Strange Pike Ball all the way back.

"Any time now, T-!"

"TYAAAAH!" Tay shouted as he flung the orange projectile with all his might. With a whistling *FWEEEEEM*, the Strange Pike Ball sailed through the air like a baseball being shot out of a cannon.

"You abhorrent humans will not outmaneuver me again…! I cannot fail here…! I CANNOT FAIL!" the Magma Ant spoke, though… its refined masculine accent sounded EERILY familiar… as though we'd encountered him before. And just as the remaining Magma Ant opened its mouth to fire off its next hot spit glob… "For my fallen brethren… For the future of Magma Ant kind…! And especially for the sake of Klaw-!" he was about to further declare before the Strange Pike Ball found itself firmly lodged in its maw with a most emphatic *KAPLARCK*. Soon after, the Pike Ball began to rapidly beep like a detonator had been triggered within it. Panicked, the Magma Ant tried to spit the projectile out, dribbles of its steaming hot mouth gunk pouring out of his face as he attempted to protect himself. The Magma Ant would hardly get a chance to figure out a plan of action, however, as the Strange Pike Ball went off with an absolutely VIOLENT *KRABWOOOM* that ripped the unfortunate insect into gooey bits. The ant giblets scattered all over the place, raining into the lava as the platform it stood on crumbled apart.

"JEEZ…! An' here, I thought snipin' them things was gruesome enough…" Tay remarked, breathing a heavy sigh of relief as he stretched his arms.

"Sayvrax Wins! Mortality!" Bolo picked the absolute best (by which I mean most inappropriate) time to utter in as low and gravelly a voice as he could muster. Tay's response to the comment? Well…

"Heh… Nice reference," the ghost warrior remarked with a chuckle, offering his teammate a fist bump.

"Glad you caught it," Bolo acknowledged with an equally humored titter as he returned the friendly gesture.

"Of course. Also, nice new Pike Ball! What do you call that one?"

"Ah, so you're a fan! That, my dear brother in arms, is called my Dynamite Pike!" the younger adventurer boasted, puffing his chest out. "It works like my Sticky Pikes, though they activate on their own when they make contact with a target instead of them being remote-detonated. They have a four-second timer, but they have MUCH stronger explosions than my Sticky Pikes."

"Not bad at all! I trust you've got more than one in case we need 'em later on?"

"Yeah! Why? Thinkin' you might borrow a few down the line?"

"Hmm… We'll have to see, but as for right now, I think they're a good substitute for my magic attacks."

"Ah, gotcha. You've got some incredible techniques, though! You really bailed us out of some MAJOR binds back there! I know you never stopped training, but I'm still surprised to see that you've gotten so much stronger in these past few months."

"Thanks, but as you've seen, I can't use too much magic all at once. If I do, it'll potentially burn me out. I have t' pace myself an' space out points at which I use it."

"I see… I suppose that makes sense, but I thought you mastered your magic by now."

"'Mastered' with the condition that it's Dual Magic that keeps growin' stronger an' more unruly with the longer it's allowed to exist inside me. The volatility of both Light and Dark Magic when they're in the same place makes it extremely difficult to keep them both at bay because they're constantly gettin' stronger as they try t' overpower each other. In turn, it makes it more difficult for me t' control."

"I'm not sure I follow. Mind giving it to me in layman's terms?" Bolo requested with a scratch of his head and a shrug.

"Sure. So… It's like if I was a battery, then I should have a strict limit for how much energy I could hold or be charged up with at any given time before it hits a cut-off point," Tay explained. "But instead of recognizin' that limit, the 'energy' inside me keeps on chargin' up past what I'm capable o' holdin', which forces me t' sometimes need t' discharge the energy. The problem with that, however, is that I can't always tell how much energy I need t' hold onto versus how much I need t' let go of. That caused me t' develop a bad habit of overchargin' my attacks because there's no internal power controller inside me that regulates it, on top of it becomin' increasingly difficult t' turn the energy off once it's been activated."

"Now, I'm picking up what you're putting down," the younger man acknowledged with a nod. "But shoot… It's really like that?"

"To a 'T.' Even worse along the lines o' this 'battery' example, the positive and negative charges keep tryin' t' cancel each other out, which instead only makes them stronger without a conceivable end point. Hence, these Inhibitor Vambraces Mimic made for me. They're designed t' be the 'circuit breakers' that help keep my energy in check an' allow me t' use it a lot more safely. They're not perfect, but they're my best hope as of yet. It's just that the other drawback is that they can get in the way when I need t' use more power than they allow, which forces me t' take 'em off for short bursts… which then contributes to the first issue. It's like no matter what I do, I'm almost always at a disadvantage…"

"Oooooohhhhhhh… Wow, that's… WOW… Dude, I couldn't imagine being so strong, yet being so heavily restricted. That would drive me nuts…!"

"Which leads us t' the next issue: Constantly tryin' t' keep myself from transformin' an' losin' control when one or both magics reach too high a level while I'm stressed out."

"Now THAT one, I'm familiar with," the headbanded huntsman acknowledged. "Considering I've seen it up close and personal, you needn't elaborate further there."

"Yeah, but I DO question why your apparent label for it is uh… 'Pulling a Tayshan,'" the wraith humbly requested to know, causing his teammate to flinch in surprise.

"Daah, who came up with THAT? Certainly not me! Not me at all! That's, like, SO disrespectful, bro! Heh… Heh…" Bolo lied with a nervous titter, rubbing the back of his head and anxiously cutting his eyes elsewhere.

"Mm-hmm. I'm SO sure," Tay remarked, evidently not buying his partner's egregious fib for a second. "We'll have t' solve that mystery later. For now, let's get off this bridge while it seems the coast is clear," he further suggested as he gestured a thumb toward the remainder of their narrow pathway.

"Sure thing. Let's move," the handyman concurred. And with that, the duo very quickly, very carefully traversed the rest of the zigzagging bridge. Despite the damage done to its parts in the preceding scuffle, Bolo and Tayshan were still able to make do with the little room they were given. It took Bolo little more than a few extra swings on the final few floating rings to reach the flower-covered checkpoint. As for Tayshan, he was made to navigate the remainder of the trail by alternating between rushing and leaping across the bridge segments and hopping across a row of small, fragile stone platforms floating about in the lava that broke apart almost as soon as he landed on them. Thankfully, he had also made it to solid ground with little issue. And with that, the boys took the moment to gain some more insight by peering across the Burning Zipper Volcanic Field from their mountainously high vantage point…

"Hm… Looks like we might actually be on the right track to our target…" Tay was quick to point out as he scanned the flowerbeds with his eyes behind his visor.

"What makes you say that?" Bolo queried as he also peered around.

"There are animal carcasses EVERYWHERE…" he ominously informed, pointing his finger at the numerous spots he saw the half-eaten remains of all sorts of animals. Giant Lava Crickets, Flamingoes, Iguanas, Vampire Ground Finches… even the likes of goats, bears, rabbits, and mongooses… Heck, there were even a few sharks and sea turtle husks… "I can see now why they put us up t' the task o' trackin' down whatever did this…"

"Oh, MAN… Whatever is here has been going on a SPREE of violence, indiscriminately hunting anything and everything it sees for food… What exactly are we looking for, anyway?"

"Hm… Far as I was told, we might be dealin' with the beginnin' stage of a Leopard Gal infestation…" the ghostly bounty hunter revealed, startling his partner out of his wits.

"…Wait… LEOPARD GAL!?" the headbanded hero questioned in noticeable fright as he turned his full attention toward his teammate.

"Yeah. I presume you're familiar with them, all things considered…" Tayshan plainly asserted.

"Ah! O-only one of them! And I doubt she could've found herself HERE of all places to cause such a mess," Bolo blurted out, flustered and shaken by the cruel reminder of his most recent misdeed. "But man… Leopard Gals can cause THIS much damage to an ecosystem?"

"Evidently. Worse yet, the report I got was that there's a SINGLE Leopard Gal here, which wouldn't have been as bad had it not been confirmed by the client that the Leopard Gal in question was… expecting. Hence, the overhuntin' she's been doing over the past week that we see right in front of us."

"Expecting? Expecting what? Someone to come looking for her?"

"No, Bolo. I mean that the Leopard Gal we're lookin' for may be pregnant," Tay revealed again, spooking the younger man to the point of nearly having a heart attack right then and there. He barely managed to keep his cool, however.

"OHHH… Jeez, I… Huh… S-so, what makes that relevant to our search?" Bolo hesitantly asked, though his unyielding anxiety plastered itself all over his face.

"A few things. One, a pregnant Leopard Gal is FAR more aggressive than a non-pregnant one. Two, she's overhuntin' and overeatin' to protect her unborn cubs an' quell her nearly insatiable appetite. And Three, we absolutely CANNOT leave her here or let her escape when we find her."

"…Which means…?"

"We either capture her an' arrange for her t' be brought into a maximum-security Endangered Monster Reserve… or we kill her on-sight."

"WHAT!? KILL HER!?" Bolo remarked in such surprise that one could've assumed he'd jump out of his shorts. "We can't do that! That's totally not our style!"

"It's gonna have t' be this time if we want t' prevent another potential invasive species crisis from befallin' Sequin Land," Tay countered, surprising Bolo even more.

"Tayshan, no. We can't kill that Leopard Gal. If we have to capture her, then fine, but-!"

"It ain't up for debate," the wraith sternly cut his teammate off to clarify. "You already see the damage this Leopard Gal has caused here, an' it's abundantly clear that this could be a prelude to a bigger tragedy if we don't nip this in the bud. An' like I said, we CANNOT let this monster girl roam free. If she tries to escape when we find her, or if it turns out we can't capture her, then… well, that leaves only one other option. Our orders from the higher ups are t' prevent or clear out the infestation by any means necessary."

"…I see. Well… In that case, we still need to keep up our reputation as heroes, even with those orders. So, as far as I'm concerned, we're gonna capture her, NOT kill her."

"Hm. If you say so, but you'd better not let your guard down when we find her. Huntin' down a monster girl known as an apex predator is FAR easier said than done. It won't necessarily be hard t' find her if we follow the trail o' bodies, but we have NO clue what she'll be capable of once we encounter her."

"…I suppose that's true, too… Either way, I suppose just standing here talking about it isn't gonna get the job done any sooner. Let's go," Bolo acknowledged, albeit a bit nervously as he gulped and took a deep, shaky breath.

"Right behind ya," Tay assured as the two began their trek further into the hazardous Burning Zipper Volcanic Field. They wouldn't walk very far before they came face-to-face with their next slew of challenges… "…Oh, boy. Gettin' down the other side o' this hill is gonna be one MAJOR headache…"

"No kidding… As if it wasn't bad enough parkouring our way through a thousand-degree lava-bathed wasteland," Bolo additionally complained as he wiped an abundant amount of sweat from his brow that had soaked right through his headband. "This path looks five hundred times WORSE than the one we just went through… There's more of those rock monsters and Magma Ants in the way! And the lava pit's even WIDER! And LONGER, too!" he further griped, taking note of the uneven, parted, unsteady platforms and zigzagging stone bridge.

"An' just in case that wasn't where our worries ended, check out the mini volcanoes pokin' up through the rainbow lava…" Tayshan additionally observed, making note of the rocky little geysers protruding above the surface of the lava, some of which had erupted with explosive *FWABLOOOOORSHes* and spouted thick, runny spouts of the extremely dangerous liquid from in between the gaps of the already precarious bridge. "Whelp… We either move real slow an' methodical, or we try an' blitz our way through it all in as little time as possible. I don't know if we have another choice…"

"If you ask me, then I'd say we should move slowly. We did a pretty good job on that last section despite us being under all that pressure from those monsters, but I-!" Bolo was about to pose his suggestion before a sudden *KWABWOOOOORRRRZZH* ripped through the air in the form of an eruption occurring from behind them. Startled senseless as the entire island quaked for the following few seconds, Tayshan and Bolo whirled around to inspect the cause of the monumental disturbance. "Ah, jeez…! What in the world was that?"

"I ain't too sure, but it looks like we're about t' find out…!" Tayshan warned as he pointed at the lava pit they'd just crossed over. And as the boys observed, a massive burst of kaleidoscopic magma went splashing off in all directions, completely soaking over and destroying every remaining part of the bridge behind them. Worse yet, a certain GIGANTIC rock lizard creature came launching forth from the river of lava.

"GRAAAAOOOOOAOAAAAAAARRAAAWWWWWWGH!" the monster roared at the top of its lungs into the air, spitting out multicolored flames and flailing its arms as it did so. Immediately afterward, the lizard golem set its malevolent sights on the two young men standing atop the mountain. And within an instant, and with *BABWOONGONGH* after *BWABOOONGOGH* of its gigantic, rocky feet, it charged directly at them with nothing but the foulest of intentions.

"SHOOT! I guess that answers our question on pacin'! We gotta bounce up out o' here!" Tay warned as he took Bolo by the hand and lifted him up as he began to sprint toward the obstacle course from someone's worst nightmares.

"Gah! H-hey, what are you doing!? I can use my own two feet!"

"Wanna risk it? Because if that thing catches you, there won't be a whole lot I could do t' save you," Tay asked and warned. Upon hearing the question, Bolo looked back at the lizard golem as it picked up speed and began clawing its way up the mountain. He merely needed a simple glance before…

"…Point taken," he agreed. "You don't expect to escape this thing while dragging me along like a ragdoll, though, do you?"

"Of course not. But if you're in agreement about hitchin' a ride, then…" Tay trailed off as he slowed down just enough to lift his partner upward with a mighty swing of his arm. Seeming to get the memo, Bolo quickly adjusted by flinging his legs over the wraith's shoulders, securing his seat as he grabbed his teammate's halo with a hand. "Hold on tight! This ride is gonna be bumpy from start t' finish!"

"You got it, bro! Any suggestions while we're charging ahead?"

"I'll race t' the finish while I figure out a way t' get that monster off our tails! You use your mace an' your pikes t' clear out any obstacles in the way!"

"Sounds like a solid strategy to me!" Bolo concurred as he whipped out his chain mace, a look of total determination in his eyes as he prepared to assist his comrade from atop said comrade's shoulders. And with that, Team Thunder-Spike took off for the race of their lives… VERY literally so.

"GROOOAAAAAAAAWWAAAAAR!" the lizard golem roared once more as it made it up to the top of the mountain and immediately began sprinting downward in hot pursuit of the Burning Zipper Volcanic Field's intruders. It proved not to be the absolute fastest thing alive, but its size MORE than made up for it as it aggressively chased down the young men. Speeding along the precarious, crumbling stone bridge, Tayshan and Bolo quickly put their teamwork to the test. As the wraith scrambled along the first of many broken-off sections of the zigzagging bridge, the human whirled and flung his mace at the many, MANY stone goblins coming their way, striking them with *KRAKROLGH* after crunchy *KRAKROLGH* to clear them out of the way. It was clear they'd have their work cut out for them, however, as it immediately became clear that there were too many of the pesky creatures to deal with all at once.

"Sh-shoot! I'm not sure I can clear all these things out of the way before they-!" Bolo tried to warn before one of them fired a laser blast at them with a frightening *PREEERSH* from just ahead. And with an even more astonishing *PRAKOW*, the attack scored a direct hit.

"GHAHAGH!" Tayshan hollered out in pain as the laser shot burned a hole in his armor. Despite this, he pushed himself through it as best as he could as he reached the end of the first bridge section and hopped across. He'd just BARELY made it onto the next bridge section before a *GWABWOOOORSH* of an eruption from a mini volcano sent rainbow lava sputtering all over the place.

"Sorry! Here, I'll take care of it! YAH!" Bolo apologized and vowed, flinging his Morning Star forth and knocking the offending goblin out with another *KRAKOLGH* as Tay blocked an incoming laser shot from another goblin with a *PRATWEENG* of its shot off his Inhibitor Vambrace.

"Hey! Just knockin' these things out one-by-one ain't gonna cut it!" the wraith advised as he hopped over another *PREEERSH* of a goblin's laser blast before countering with a *BWEEERSH* of a Specter Flash that vaporized the monster with a *KRAKAPOWGH*. "Either figure out their pattern or start usin' your special Pike Balls to get 'em out o'-! HYAH!" he tried to warn before being made to lunge over another *GWAGABWOOOOOOF* of a mini volcano's eruption just beneath them. Barely making it once again, the ghostly guardian hopped onto one of two rows of fragile floating platforms that seemed at a glance to be meant for two people to run across simultaneously. Meanwhile, the lizard golem was still hot on their backs and opening its mouth to charge up some sort of devastating fire blast. To make matters even more daunting, the lava goblins hadn't let up as they doggedly pursued the pair of adventurers.

"Darn it…! He's counting on me, and I'm totally blowing it…! Guess it's time to bust out Ol' Reliable…" Bolo urged himself as he swapped out his chain mace for some sort of fancy gold boomerang…? What good would THAT do? I wonder… "GO, SLASHER-RANG!" he shouted as he flung the projectile to the side. And wouldn't you know it? The specialized boomerang careened toward an entire row of the rock goblins, cutting right through them with *KRASCHWING* after *KAFWOONG* while spikes came jutting out of it with every hit it scored. In that same moment, Bolo pulled out a handful of his Homing Pikes and flung them forth while another small collection of the lava goblins were preparing to fire more lasers at them. And with another series of *POPs* and *KAKRACKs* of his special pikes, Bolo managed to clear most of them as his Slasher-Rang returned to him. He wound up missing one, however, as it fired another *PREEERSH* of a laser shot directly at him. "Wha!? Oh, n-!" he was about to panic before…

"DYAH!" Tayshan shouted as he reached upward to block the incoming laser with his vambrace. With another *PATWIIING*, he defended his teammate before extending his other arm forth and unleashing another *BWEEERSH* of a Specter Flash that vanquished the goblin once and for all.

"W-whoa, that was a close one… Thanks for the save, Tayshan!"

"Sure, but we ain't in the clear yet…! Hold on as tight as you can, 'cuz it's about t' get real!"

"What do you me-?" the pike and boomerang specialist was about to ask before a MONSTROUS *KABWOOOOOOOAAAASH* of a blast being launched from behind cut him off. And as he turned to look, Bolo spotted a fireball that looked to be about the size of a WATER TOWER careening toward them with every intent to completely vaporize the two of them. "W-W-W-W-WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WAAAHAAAAH! HOLY SH-!"

"ARRYAAAH!" Tayshan cut in and shouted at the PERFECT time as he put his leg power to the test. Pumping his legs full of Light Magic, he took a MAJOR leap of faith over the gap between the two rows of crumbling floating stone platforms. He crossed over from one row to the other, landing with a *KAPLORCK* of his boots against the rugged surface of the platform before continuing his mad dash. Within seconds of his transition to the other lane, the fireball tore through the platforms and much of the bridge behind them before colliding with the enormous mountainside. With an utterly awe-inspiring *KRABOOOOOOOOOOOOWRRGHSH*, the projectile exploded like a star in outer space. Lava was sent splattering SKY HIGH as the blast also sent a rippling wave of suffocating heat that nearly blew our heroes off their feet.

"WHAAAOAOAAAAGH!" Bolo bellowed, gripping tightly onto Tayshan's halo for dear life as the ethereal ring glowed brighter in his hand.

"Hot, hot, hot, hot, hothothothothothothothot!" Tayshan complained, picking up speed as he sprinted harder across the crumbling platforms that were now coated in the goopy, piping hot prismatic liquid. It… was immediately evident that the wraith had stepped into some of it, however, as he began to leave flaming footprints with every step he took. "HWOO-HOO-HOO-HA-HOT-HOT-HOT! WAHAH-HA-HA-HOT-HOT-HOT! HAH! WHAH!" he continued to shout, evidently REALLY feeling the heat. Upon noticing his friend's unrelenting magma-borne torment…

"Yikes… I'm suddenly glad I chose to ride up here instead of-!"

"Contacts on our three an' nine, Bolo!" Tay cut him off to warn as he leapt over another mini volcano that erupted with a *GWABLORFOLORGH* of more of this mesmerizing viscous lava just behind them. Soon after, he landed on another paper-thin zigzagging bridge segment where a collection of Magma Ants were spotted on floating platforms up ahead preparing to spit balls of their lava-like secretions. Additionally, another tiger golem came springing up from its hiding spot in the lava river. "Oh, an' then another one o' these things shows up…" he further murmured as both his hands began to glow with Light Magic.

"Looks like the pressure's mounting on us!" Bolo acknowledged as he pulled a handful of Sticky Pikes from his pocket and flung them one by one at the Magma Ants that were trying to melt them into scalding puddles. He would find trouble, however, as some of the Magma Ants shot their piping hot secretions at the projectiles. As such, the compromised Sticky Pikes dissolved in midair with a collective *SKISSSSSSSH*. The pikes that didn't wind up being neutralized managed to reach their targets, if only just barely. And just as the handyman was about to pull out the remote control…

"GWOOORRAARRRRRGH!" the tiger golem let out a most intimidating roar as it sprinted up the mountainside to try and stop the wraith and the human in their tracks. It was additionally daunting that the tiger destroyed parts of the zigzagging bridge as it charged right at them, scooping up a mouthful of magma to spit at them. At that point, the ghostly guardian stretched his arms outward from his sides and hurriedly charged magic into each of his hands as he continued to sprint down the narrow, busted-up stone bridge. And within the next couple of seconds…

"DOUBLE GEIST BULLET!" Tayshan shouted, letting loose another pair of electric force balls with another *KAPWOOOAWOAAAAARRRSH*. Within a second, and with another glorious *KRAKABWOOOORSH*, the tiger golem was blown into gravelly bits as a mixture of lava and molten rock scattered all around. Just then, the wraith was made to hop over two giant sections of fragmented bridge to get to a spot with better footing. Right as he landed on the next bridge section, however, a Magma Ant spat a glob of its magma saliva onto the path. A literal second later, Bolo pressed the button on his remote to set his Sticky Pikes off with a series of *KRABWOOMs* and *KARPOWs* that took out some of the Magma Ants he targeted. And with a truly terrifying *KRAKKRUMBASKISSSSSSSSSSSSSH*, the bridge began to disintegrate in front of them! "What the-!? Darn it…! Ghah, how much more o' this do we need t' suffer through…!? Ghahagh…! Hah…!" he complained, wincing in searing pain as his arms momentarily crackled with a *KRAZAP* of electricity.

"What's happening? Are we o-?"

"Hand me your chain mace! We're runnin' out o' room on this bridge, an' now the only way across is the floatin' rings ahead!"

"Aw, jeez! Sure! You know how to use it though, right?" Bolo queried as he frantically pulled out his Morning Star and handed it to Tayshan.

"I do," Tay affirmed as he got Bolo's Morning Star. "Brace yourself, though, because we're goin' into full swing!"

"Ohh, man…! This has got to be the wildest ride of my liiiiiiaaAAAAHAHAAHAAAAH!" the younger adventurer was about to observe just as his teammate jumped off the last bit of bridge and flung the chain mace's flail forward. And with a *KRACHING*, the mace latched onto the ring, allowing the boys to swing across right as another *SPLAKISSHHHHHHH* of Magma Ant spit melted the last bit of bridge they were previously standing on.

"YAH!" Tayshan shouted as he used the momentum from his swing to propel himself upward and forth, retracting the mace all the while. Hurriedly, he flung the weapon forth again and connected it with another *KAKLINK* to a second hook. "HWAAARRRRAH!" he hollered, pouring his focus into swinging across the massive gap between the last bridge section and the final stretch of floating, crumbling platforms. Their journey would get no easier, however, as another collection of lava goblins came springing up, every single one of them ready to sabotage our heroes' efforts to reach the other end of this nightmarish obstacle course. Worse yet, more Magma Ants on platforms AND another tiger golem brazenly approached while the giant lizard golem began to charge up another fireball in its mouth.

"Looks like now's a perfect time to start putting these things to good use…!" Bolo observed as he pulled out his Slasher-Rang and flung it as hard as he could at the lava goblins. And while his fancy, spiky boomerang did its job of automatically zooming in on the lava goblins and taking them out with *KRAKROCK* after *CHATHRISCK*, the indomitable weapons expert pulled out another of his patented Dynamite Pikes and flung it at one of the incoming Magma Ants as Tayshan propelled the two of them forth from one ring to the next. Bolo took the opportunity to fling another Dynamite Pike toward another Magma Ant whose platform had come closer, managing to stick the timed explosive on the platform before his Slasher-Rang returned to him. Within a few seconds, the first Dynamite Pike went off with a monstrous *KRABWOOOOM*, annihilating the targeted Magma Ant just as it fired off another one of its scalding spit gobs high into the air. In the next couple of seconds, the second Dynamite Pike went off with another *BABOOOM*, destroying the platform the Magma Ant was standing on and sending the insect to a most unpleasant lava-borne demise.

"Hah…! How we doin' back there?" Tay took the time to ask as he kept up with the momentum of flinging them from ring to ring, though he was forced to use one hand to swing across the next three rings as he used his other hand to fire *BWEEERSH* after *BWEEERSH* of Specter Flashes at Magma Ants that weren't targeted by his teammate. "Ghaaah…! Shoot, this hurts…!" he further remarked with an especially pain-addled wince as he endured another *CHAPROCK* of recoil-borne electricity ripping through his aching arms.

"It looks like this situation's as good as it can-! TAY, WATCH OUT!" Bolo warned immediately when he watched a wayward Magma Ant spit gob splatter all over three of the final five rings with a disheartening *SPLAKISSSSHHHHHH*, melting them into neon-colored droplets right as the wraith reached the ring right before them.

"Gaahh…! Shoot, this ain't good…!" Tayshan acknowledged as he began a swing that had no immediate destination while they dangled from the lone stone ring. Worse yet, the tiger golem in front of them was barreling toward them with every intent to either eat or burn them alive as it scooped up a mouthful of rainbow magma and prepared to spit it at them.

"What do we do!? We're goners if we don't-!"

"TORYAAAAAH!" Tayshan hollered at the top of his lungs as he… LAUNCHED HIMSELF FROM THE RING!? Oh, jeez!

"WHOA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? WHAAAAHAHAAAAAAAH!" Bolo rightfully panicked, latching onto his insane teammate's halo for dear life as the two of them went rocketing up into the air with nowhere to land except into the lava below… before Tayshan whistled some sort of Morse code that summoned a team of multicolored falcons into the vicinity. Within a second, the birds collected into each other and formed a very familiar platform for the boys to land on for a hot second as Tayshan's boots connected with a *POOMPH* on the avian assistants' backs. "Wooh…! What the…? Did you just use Sky's Falcon Call to save us?"

"Hah… Hah… For the moment, yeah… Hah…" Tay breathlessly informed as he hurriedly performed a visual assessment of their predicament. "Thankfully, there was only a couple rings left down below… hah… before we hit the home stretch to the other side, but… hah…! But we need t' move quick. That lizard's about t' shoot another fireball at us, so… whew…! You're gonna need t' hang on tight! An' get those Dynamite Pikes ready for that rock tiger back there!"

"S-sure, but what do you plan on-?"

"HRRRYAAAAAH!" Tay bellowed as he put all his leg power into jumping off the Falcon Platform with hardly a second of thought as the ominous *KABWOOOOOOOAAAASH* of the lizard golem's fire blast rang out. Thankfully, Sky's falcons were able to clear themselves out of the blast's path before they could wind up being fried to a crisp.

"GHAAAAAAAAAHWAAAAAAAARGH!" Bolo also bellowed, albeit for an entirely different reason as he grabbed Tay's halo with both hands. The impromptu 'flight' would only last a couple of seconds, though it felt like an eternity as the boys practically glided downward. And just as they began to lose forward momentum…

"REAPER WIND BURST!" Tayshan shouted as he stretched a highly magic-charged hand back and swung it as hard as he could toward the lava beneath them. And with a mighty *FWOOOOOOOOORRSSSH* of gale force wind blowing downward, the ghost guardian managed to extend his time in the air by just a single crucial second as the lizard golem's fireball careened downward toward them. Meanwhile, the relentless tiger golem's spit blast NARROWLY missed them "SHOOM!" the undead adventurer grunted once more as he flung the Morning Start forth and latched onto one of the last two rings with a *CHAKLINK*. And while Tayshan prepared for a DANGEROUSLY low swing…

"Have a taste of these, you gravelly goon!" Bolo shouted as he catapulted two of his special Dynamite Pikes at the stone tiger while it was gathering up more oral ammunition in the form of the lava it was racing through. Bolo's aim proved reliable as he managed to stick his explosives on the stony behemoth's face as it rose from the lava. He would get no chance to celebrate, however, as he felt the SEVERE heat of the lava beneath them as his teammate swung them across using his chained flail. "Whoahahahhothothothothot! Dude, you're swinging KINDA close for comfort here!" he warned as his Dynamite Pikes went off with twin *KABLOOOOMs*, blowing the tiger golem into chunks without either of them noticing.

"As if I don't know! Save the complaints for after we get out o' this mess!" Tay irritably shot back as he poured all his focus into building up as much momentum as possible to prepare for the next swing. They… would not have to worry about that, however, as the lizard golem's fire blast smashed into the lava lake RIGHT behind them while the boys were on the upswing. And just as Tay reached precise moment he needed to pull the chain mace from the floating stone ring, the lizard golem's blast detonated with an utterly MONUMENTAL *KRABOOOOOOOOOOOOWRRGHSH*.

"WHOAAAAAWAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" both Bolo and Tayshan hollered in unison as the unadulterated force of the blast sent the ROCKETING upward and forth at an entirely BLISTERING speed no human being would want to be flying at without a parachute. The two young men WAY overshot their intended target as they went sailing over the ring… over the next series of zigzag bridge segments… over the final set of crumbling stone platforms… and pretty much over the ENTIRE rest of the obstacle course and into the distance as lava splashed, sloshed, and rained all over the remaining obstacles and melted them into oblivion. Meanwhile, the lizard golem scoured the immediate area to see no signs of the humans it was trying so desperately to destroy… until it peered up ahead to see the young men helplessly careening through the air and into the flowerbeds beyond the end of the lava lake.

"…Huh. I wonder if those were the guys I hired to take care of my Leopard Gal problem…" the lizard… golem… Wait a second, did this thing just TALK!? Also, did I hear it right through its low, gravelly voice? IT was the person who hired our heroes for their 'bounty hunt'? "If they are, then I think I can consider the issue taken care of. They seem capable enough, all things considered, and they DID do me a solid in wiping out all those pesky Magma Ants that came along with that Leopard Gal. I just wish they weren't so quick to assume I was their enemy and attack me. Then again, I probably should've just said something first instead of losing my temper and attacking them right back… So, I guess we were all in the wrong there…" the lizard golem mentioned, though it suddenly flinched in astonishing pain upon finishing its statement.

"Ogh…! Hmmmh…! Gah, whatever magic attack that golden ghost ninja fired into my mouth is gonna have my dentist complaining for weeks, though…! Ow, ow, ow…!" the tower-sized lizard golem further complained as it brought one of its hands to its face and rubbed its apparently aching cheek. "Ah, well… I just hope they're more capable than the last few groups of hunters I hired for the same task over the past week… I'll leave them to it…" And with that last statement, the lizard golem calmed itself down and turned around to begin its trek back to its lair. I mean… I think it begs the question of why a behemoth so large couldn't take care of the problem itself, but… I digress.

"It's because I have debilitating ailurophobia, on top of me being deathly allergic to cat-like creatures," the lizard golem turned and complained at me, which… ah, okay, apparently, THIS is happening now. But like… I just had to ask…

How… do you explain the tiger golems, then…?

"They're the ONLY exception. On both fronts. In fact, they are my pets. It helps that they aren't organic. Going anywhere near an ACTUAL feline would cause me to break out in terrible hives and make my throat close up. Don't you judge me," the stony behemoth further clarified. "And my name is Sir Krakato, thank you very much."

Scared of real cats AND allergic to them while being fond of cats made of rocks? Eh… m-my bad… I uh… I suppose I understand now… as much as I can, anyway… I'll er… save my mountains of other questions for another time, though. Thanks for letting me know, Mr. Krakato, sir…

"Sure, whatever. Now, make yourself scarce and go see how those hunters are doing. I'm going back to sleep… Hopefully, that mangy feline will be done away with by the time I wake up…" the rocky reptile made its—er, HIS request with a nonchalant as he turned back around and continued his march back to his nest.

During his pilgrimage, however, Sir Krakato would momentarily find himself perplexed when he cast his gaze upward and spotted the image of a giant glowing bird approaching the volcanic field from a considerable distance away. Despite the rock monster's initial curiosity, however, he found himself the farthest thing from interested as he shrugged and trudged back up the lava-soaked mountain. For those of us who know better, of course, there was… something OMINOUSLY amiss about a 'glowing bird' that randomly showed up out of nowhere with no explanation. Even more ominously, the bird seemed to be headed right toward the general area where our heroes landed, though it remained high in the sky as though it was patrolling the area… Well, that's certainly something I hope doesn't wind up becoming another problem for them later, but we'll find out when we reconvene. On that note, see ya in a flash!