...I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus...3

Konan was nervous. She was standing backstage, waiting for Tsunade to stop talking so that she could get this over with. First she was singing Holly and the Ivy, Silent night, and Santa Claus is coming to town with the rest of the choir (with dance moves, of course) and then she would be going up all by herself (besides Hinata and Sakura, who were doing back-ups for the chorus) and then she would go backstage again before singing Hey Mama by the Black Eyed Peas (the choir's holiday surprise). And, naturally, Konan had been picked to do Fergie's solo. Love-leee.

"And so the last thing I have to say today is...Happy Holidays, have fun, and no fooling around at the party. I would have said the other F-word, but I don't think I'm supposed to. But imagine I said it. So, there we go. And now...Might Guy's choir with their Christmas carols! Give it up! Whooo!"

Tsunade escaped off stage, leaving Konan wishing that it was her escaping to coffee and a nice inconspicuous chair. But oh no. She filed onstage after most of the girls to a load of cheers and whistles. They were all wearing long white robes (which underneath were hidden their Black Eyed Peas song outfits and Konan's solo snowflake dress) and holding song books. As Konan sang along with them through the first three songs, she thought that they looked very soulful

. And then it was her solo turn, and she reviewed the first half of the song's lyrics as she hid momentarily behind the choir, discarded her robes offstage, then walked forwards, heart pounding, as Guy announced her name, as well as Sakura and Hinata's (they were also wearing similar dresses, but without the stockings and gloves, and theirs were white, not pale pale pale grey.) Konan focused on not blushing as she heard Sasori and Pain shouting Hottie-Konan! WHOOOO! YEAH! SEXY! Konan took the stand-less mic (how do you spell that, anyways), heard the music begin, and took a deep breath. I...saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus...underneath the mistletoe last night... Konan was screaming inside, as she focused on looking around the room (looking directly at the walls) and not hyperventilating.

Finally, she finished. There was a huge round of applause, and a standing ovation from her friends. She laughed and blew a kiss at them before exciting quickly, making sure not to fall over this time. Everybody else filed on stage, dancing and wearing (in Ino's case) cut-off tops and mini skirts. In everybody else's case, it was tight-ish shirts and loose jeans, cargo pants, or shorts. Konan, Sakura and Hinata quickly stripped off their dresses and heels, and Konan put on her grey tanktop, and tight, dark, torn jeans with red converse, then ran back onstage, Sakura and Hinata following in vaguely similar outfits.

They at once joined in the dancing and singing; Cutie cutie, make sure you move your booty, shake that thing like the city of sin, and, hey shorty, I know you want to party but the way your body movin' got me really feelin' naughty...' Konan was awaiting the dreaded moment when she would strut up to the front of the stage and do her bit. Here it comes, here it...Konan moved through the throng, listening to the song, knowing exactly when she was supposed to start, but also dreading it at the same time. She pushed through the crowd, grabbed the second mic ('Will.' still had the first) and began as a cheer erupted from her friends (she hadn't told them about this particular solo) Yall know...WillIam (really, it was some sixth year, but whatever) Konan began, trying to feel like Fergie might (my chick bad, my chick hood...) 'Who we are...' she said, just like in the song...and then, We the stars, steady rockin' on in yalls boulevards...' WilllIAm; How we rockin' it girl... Then without bodyguards... then she be...; Konan was moving around the stage, following the precise choreography she'd been taught, all the while feeling like throwing up. 'Fergie...BEP, come and take heed as we take the lead...so come on Papa, dance to the drama.' And then she handed the mic (mik? Mike) to the next singer, and joined the throng of dancing students.

"Good job!" Sakura said to her, and Konan smiled in relief; she hadn't fallen off the stage, thrown up, ruined the song, forgotten the words or the dance moves, so all was vaguely well. In theory.

After the concert, Konan and the others changed into their festive outfits (they couldn't wear their concert stuff and pretend to be angels. Shame, right?). Konan had decided to be a candy cane, and she had diagonally-striped leggings and tight longsleeve, over which she wore a red tutu skirt (for fun, seeing as she had one lying around) and a white t-shirt with a huge picture of a candycane and a heart on it. She wore a red flower in her hair instead of a white one, and her red converse. She had also thought ahead and painted her nails red and white. She went to join her friends as they all trooped to the dance. They congratulated her on her 'sexy' performance of her songs, and they were laughing as they went to the Secret Santa Surveillance Center (the last word didn't start with an S, but it's the best the staff could do).

Everybody lined up with their Secret Santa and their Secret Santa receiver, holding the paper with the photo of the person they'd made a clue to to prove that they'd solved it. Konan stood Sasori and in front of Sasuke. Pain's secret santa had been Sakura, whose clue had been that he only used sterling silver for his piercings. She had, apparently, found that out when Konan told her absent-mindedly after Pain had complained that his new earrings that he'd ordered specially were gold, and he couldn't wear them. Sasori's had been Hinata, whose clue had been that he had been friends with Neji in preschool. Hidan's clue was from some fourth year, and it was that in first year, he'd dunked Deidara's head in a toilet. Kakuzu's clue had been from Naruto, saying that he once mooned Tsunade. Kisame's clue, from Temari, was that he used to eat raw fish. Itachi's clue, from Kisame, was that he has a scar shaped like a moon on his thigh. Deidara's clue was, in fact, from Pain, saying that he had a tattoo of a stiched-up mouth on his chest. They all filed into the dance, where Yeah! by Usher, was already playing. They all cheered and began dancing.

Konan quickly found Sasori and Deidara (both looking frankly adorable in their costumes) and they quickly began dancing to Walk this way (aerosmith). Soon Konan drifted off to find Pain. He grabbed her, and she spun, grinning at him. He was dressed in black jeans, red converse like hers, a white tank and an open red shirt. He was apparently being a modern santa claus.

"Hey! Dance with me!" she shouted above the music. He grinned back at her, and began to do the dance to Cha cha slide as the music came on. One hop this time! One hop this time! They danced through four more songs before Kisame, Itachi, Hidan and Kakuzu burst through the doors and jumped on them.

"Hey bitches! That line was fucking long."

"So is your di-" Kakuzu was interrupted by a large hand that slapped over his mouth.

"Fuck you, 'Kuzu! Yeah I said it! Fuck you! Fuck you with something hard and sandpapery!" he shouted, and Konan, Pain, and everybody laughed, reconizing the Kelly quote (lemme borrow that top).

After twenty minutes of leaping around and stuff, a seventh-year ( a helper from Konan's origami class) came on to the stage and set up a karaoke machine, with a huge screen facing the students, and lighting so that whoever was up there's silhouettes would be seen against a coloured background, like on an ipod commercial.

"Okay, first twenty groups up here get chocolate!" Shizune's voice announced over the music through the intercom. There was a huge swell of kids rushing forwards. Konan looked at the others.

"She said groups, right? Are any of you going up?" she asked.

"Hell yeah!" Hidan shouted, grabbing Kakuzu, Itachi and Kisame and barging through, knocking over a frail first-year. Sasori, who had reappeared with Deidara raised his eyebrows, smirking.

"Dei-babe and I are gonna go. What about you two?" Pain looked at Konan reluctant expression and laughed, grabbing her arm.

"We're gonna kick your asses." he shouted over the music, and dragged Konan through the crowd, ignoring her protests, which were all along the lines of 'I feel sick', 'Oh, look, is that Hinata? I want to talk to her...' and 'Seriously, no! No way! I...am allergic to...karaoke machines!' Pain just laughed and pulled her through the other dancing teens.

They ended up at the front of the stage, jumping up and down, waiting their turn as groups of people climbed up, turned on the machine, and danced and sang as people filmed them and stuff. Konan laughed hysterically as Hidan, Kakuzu, Kisame and Itachi went up and did a hilarious version of Wake me up before you Go-Go (Wham!). Konan screamed with laughter (making a second year give her a funny look) when Itachi leaped forwards and did a solo, his black silhouette's hair flying as he sang; I wanna hit that HIIIIIIIIIGH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, BABY!

Sasori and Deidara went up after Ino and her new BFF (she found another quickly...) went up and sang Slave for you. "Great choice, don't you think?" Konan asked drily, and Pain nodded seriously, then laughed. Sasori and Deidara sang you shook me all night long, leaving them beet-red in the face from trying to get the ACDC quality into their voices (Kisame quickly snapped a picture of them after they escaped the bright purple light; they looked like tomatoes.) Finally, Konan and Pain climbed up onto the stage.

"What are you gonna put on?" Konan asked, desperately embarassed as her friends started cheering as her black silhouette fidgeted awkwardly against the bright green light. Pain straightened up, having apparently selected the song.

"Just wait. Deidara's gonna love this." Konan's mouth dropped open. And then she laughed (Some of the dancers were surprised; her laugh was exactly like the one in the beginning of the song.) And then..."I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want!" Pain shouted, and Konan found herself shouting back, having memorized the words. "So tell me what you want, what you really, really want!" They were dancing, and people were cheering and singing along as Wannabe pounded out of the speakers, Pain's and Konan's voices rising above the noise.

"Slam your body down and zigazig ahhhh!" Konan finished, and leapt off the stage. Pain (who had jumped off earlier) caught her, and held her up above him, holding her up by her middle. She put her hands on his shoulders and rested some of her weight there as she looked down at him, grinning as he laughed. He span around once, and she accidentally kicked several people in the head as her feet went flying. Then her lowered her down quickly, and she practically fell into his face as she kissed him.

No mistletoe neccesary.

After the dance was over, they all trooped back to their rooms and changed, packing their costumes either into their bags, or into their wardrobes. Konan was sighing at least twice a minute as she pulled on her grey and black vertical-striped tights, her black ruffled dress, black converse, and grey pea coat. She replaced her white paper flower, redid her messy half-bun, fixed her dark-blue eyeshadow, picked up her black lace umbrella that Kisame had given her as a birthday present and her black bag, and walked miserably out of her room. She met the others in Deidara's room, where they were all talking enthousiastically about their vacation plans. Konan tried to look cheerful as she thought glumly of her plans, which revolved mostly around a dingy hostel, an incredibally cheap (she had a total of thirty-five dollars on her, which would have to cover food as well as shelter) motel, or an orphanage (you never know). She forced herself to look on the bright side of her situation; she might lose weight! Huzzah.

As they left the school, according to grade level, Konan cheered up slightly when Deidara grabbed her for group photos. They took lots of random ones, from a human pyramid (Konan on top, to her immense releif; upper body strength was pityingly miserable in her field) to Charlie's Assholes poses (Hidan flatly refused to do any pose that was associated with angels) Finally, Konan stole the camera from Kisame, and insisted on taking couple shots (just to embarass them). First Deidara and Sasori volunteered themselves for a picture. Sasori stood behind Deidara, his arms around him and posing as if he was about to bite Deidara's neck vampirically while Deidara licked his lips. (the Cullens exist! Quick, where's a bonfire...:3) Next Kisame dragged Itachi into a picture. Itachi was sulking, while Kisame stood behind him and made him smile with his fingers in the corners of his mouth. Itachi looked really silly. Hidan and Kakuzu were up, but Konan took the picture (on purpose, of course) at the exact moment that Kakuzu got irritated with Hidan's teasing, and throttled him. Konan was about to put the camera away, when Sasori grabbed it, and insisted on there being a picture of 'the second-sexiest couple'. Naturally, he and Deidara were the 'sexiest couple', and Konan had to agree, simply because Deidara had the best hair out of all of them, her included.

She wasn't sure what to do, and looked at Pain awkwardly as they stood in the shin-deep snow. She was about to ask what they should do when, without warning, he scooped her up bridal-style, and told her to smile. Konan didn't, out of sheer stubborn habit, and hid her face in his shoulder. She heard the camera click as Deidara said; 'AWwwwww! Konan, you're so cute, un.' Konan laughed. And then she realized that Pain hadn't put her down. Joy of joys, he seemed content to carry her forever. Sasori hung her bag on her ankle as they set off across the field towards the bus station, Konan all the while trying to convince Pain that she was perfectly capable of walking. He just laughed.

They finally (it had taken two hours for the bus to plow through the snow) made it onto the rickety black double-decker, and they plopped themselves down in the cold leather seats with sighs of relief. Konan was frozen. And she wasn't the only one; the bus had no windowpanes, so the freezing cold air just flew in. The bus driver himself was wearing a parka and a balaclava. Deidara had joked that for all we knew, the driver might stop the bus in a small road, and demand all the money people were carrying. As soon as Konan's teeth had begun chattering, Pain (who had been sitting next to her) scooped her up again, so her legs were over his and her arms were around him as he hugged her. Konan had to admit, no matter how much teasing she was enduring, she was a lot warmer.

"Thank you." she said quietly, her voice slightly muffled by Pain's jacket, and he kissed the top of her head. Konan felt herself blush, and was thankful that nobody could see.

"Hey Konan! Your ears are turning red!" Sasori called from the back of the bus. Dang it. Or, she'd thought nobody could see. Pain began to laugh, and Konan's ears (and face) turned redder before she insisted it was from cold.

"Riiight." Sasori said sarcastically, and everybody laughed when Konan shook her head, and seemed to deem the situation unworthy of a reply.

Konan got off the bus a stop before everybody else. She decided that this was the only place she vaguely knew, and that she would probably get lost if she went anywhere else. As she stood up and grabbed her bag, she suddenly felt very indescisive about her decision to be alone at Christmas. What was so wrong about begging somebody to let her stay? No. No way. The day I grovel on my knees and beg Hidan for a place to stay will be the day I dye my hair blonde. Not. Happening. She sighed, and hugged all her friends, wishing them Happy Holidays (so at least they had fun), and she kissed them on the cheek. Sasori slapped her ass as she turned to Deidara, and she kicked his shin in retaliation. Finally she trotted (she tried to run, but her huge coat and the short distance she had to travel ruined that plan) over to Pain, and hugged him tightly.

"I love you. I'll miss you." she said in his ear, and then she blushed like a ripe peach: that was the very first time since she'd officially started 'dating' him that she'd said she loved him out loud. Sasori tactfully (OMG; Sasori being tactful! LOok OUt! :3) didn't comment this time. Pain kissed her quickly, then looked at her.

"I love you more." he said, grinning. Konan blushed and looked at her feet before realizing that he had pulled her into a real kiss. After thirty seconds, there was a chorus of GET A ROOM!, and the bus driver asked if she was getting off or not, so Konan (regretting every second of it) had to pull away, hug him once more, say bye, and dash off the bus. As she watched her friends all waving at the windows, she blew them a kiss, and watched the bus depart around a corner. She wished she was still on it so much, that she took a step as if to chase after it. But no. Her holidays would remain here; in the quiet, little town of Malaise, where she'd gone once to convince the doctor and her father that she didn't have rickets.

Konan wandered around for a bit as the sky grew darker. Apparently Malaise was one of the few places in the developped world that only had one hotel, and it was completely booked for the next four months. So Konan bought herself half a sandwich (she would have to ration herself, due to her miserable amount of cash) and went into a bookstore, and read some books for three and a half hours. Finally the owner asked if she was going to buy any of them, because the store was closing. Konan, blushing from embarassment, hurried out of the shop.

She wandered around a little as the sky grew darker, and the air became (if possible) even colder. Konan had long before stuffed her hands into her gloves and mittens, and had pulled on a wool hat and scarf. Finally she gave in to the hunger that had been gnawing at her for hours (her stomach seemed to have forgotten the half-sandwich of four and a half hours ago) and bought a small bowl of hot soup. She sat down at the back of a gas station, next to the ventilation system (where it was warmest) and curled up around her soup. She dug her blanket out of her bag and wrapped it around herself. Konan was so miserable, she couldn't imagine how poor people could survive like this year-round. Gradually, she fell into a fitful slumber, constantly awakening at the slightest noise. Woken up again by a squirrel in the bushes, Konan sighed as she huddled under her blanket, and looked into the darkness. It was pitch-black. Konan had thoughtlessly decided to spend her holdiays outside a gas station. Thoughtlessly, because at the time, she had forgotten that she was desperately afraid of the dark. And yet here she was. Sitting alone, in a seedy-looking city, cold, and in the dark during the Christmas holidays. And now she was wallowing in self-pity. Oh joy.

Konan woke up the next morning, cold, hungry, and more uncomfortable than she'd ever felt in her entire life. She was stiff all over. It even seemed to hurt just to breathe. With a lot of swearing and complaining to herself, she stood up and stretched her aching body. For some odd reason, she felt like crying. She shook her head, wishing that Pain was here. At least if he was, she'd be warm. And probably laughing, hugging or kissing him. Missing Pain just made Konan horribly homesick. Or...school-sick? Konan shook her head, and then thought of her other friends as she walked to the nearby park. They were probably having fun and laughing, assuming that she was warm and happy with some friend. But no. Konan's breath clouded before her as she realized that it was probably only six am. She sighed and sat down on a snow-covered bench, her feet numb already from cold. She hoped that she would still have ten toes when she returned to school.

She spent the day watching pigeons and reading old newspapers. She had a juicebox, a granola bar, and a box of digestifs for a mixed breakfast and lunch. She was beginning to get used to the ache in her stomach from continued hunger, and was starting to get better at looking innocent when her stomach roared loudly as she walked past people. She may have perfected her 'It wasn't me' expression, but her reddened face gave her away every time. Normally when she was caught staring wistfully at restaurants and bakerys, stomach growling in protest at its emptiness, everybody who saw her seemed to think she was on a diet, or anorexic.

It was beginning to get dark again as Konan made her way back to the gas station, her stomach slightly less empty with a hot chocolate and a bag of pretzels. She had begun wearing her blanket all day, due to a sudden drop in temperature, which made icicles grow on her hair if she got snow in it. She sat down on the sheltered concrete (there was a snow roof) and huddled around herself. She closed her eyes and imagined that she was exploring the ruins of Atlantis. She was the only remaining descendant of Xandra, the powerful Atlantian sorceress. Just as Konan had discovered the way to reanimate Xandra's statue and free the evil general's harem, she awoke with a jolt. Somebody was standing in front of her. A man. A big, tall man with a frightening face and a flashlight, which was pointing at her face. She blinked, and jumped to her feet, terror rising through her; she was afraid of the dark. She was afraid of being alone in the dark. She was afraid of scary-looking people. And here they were, three of her major fears coming together. WHY MEEEE?

"What're you doing, sleeping out here in the cold?" The man asked. Konan told herself calmly not to be scared. She, of course, wasn't listening to herself at all.

"Um...I was just...I was just tired. But I'm going now, so...sorry!" she blurted, grabbing up her bag and walked quickly away with a few more muttered apologies. The man switched off the flashlight, and went back into the station. Konan breathed a sigh of relief, before her relief turned to fear and anxiety; where would she go now? It was probably one, or two in the morning, and she didn't know anywhere else that had some kind of warmth outside of it. She was standing, knee-deep in snow, and she was lost. She had never been here in the dark. She could barely see things five feet from her. And she was alone, cold, with nowhere to go, and nobody she knew. At least things can't get any worse, Konan thought in a half-hearted attempt to cheer herself up. But then things got much worse.

Typical, Konan thought as she heard the crunching of many feet behind her in the snow.

She whirled around, losing her balance slightly in the deep snow. About five people, all men from what Konan could see, were making their way towards her. She didn't see a single friendly-looking face in the darkness. Steeling her nerves, she forced herself to stay calm. She clenched her fists, gritted her teeth and glared at them. She heard one laugh coldly. She almost laughed as a wild thought ran through her head; Deep down, there's a little girl screaming to get out...and that little girl's me. Konan fought the urge to run with all her might; she would never run fast enough to get away from them in this deep snow. It was better to see what they wanted, scream if they made an offer she had to refuse, or politely decline if they were pretending to be nice.

"What are you doing out here all alone?" One asked in a rough voice. Konan looked at him. His silhouette was dark, and she couldn't see him.

"I...I'm not alone." she said, remembering the 10 rules of staying un-kidnapped that her mother had taught her during a sane moment in the asylum. Rule number One: Never say you are alone. The man laughed.

"You look pretty alone to me. What are you doing out here?" he asked again. Konan tried to remember if she was supposed to lie or not. She decided to lie.

"I'm just waiting for a bus. It should be here now." One of the other men chuckled darkly, making Konan shudder with unwanted fear. They were still coming closer, and she was still backing away.

"Now that's funny. The buses stop coming at eleven. It's two in the morning." Konan mentally swore to herself.

"Well...it's a charter bus. From my..." Damn! Do I say I go to school, or do I pretend I'm older than I am? HELP ME! YAAAGH! "From my school." she blurted out finally. She was considering saying from her job, but what kind of job sends their employers out at two in the morning?

"You go to school? How old are you?" Another asked, still walking towards her. Konan stumbled a little as she moved backwards. Rule number Two: never say how old you are. Lie. Never say you are younger than you are, either. Twenty-five and up is much safer than fifteen. "I'm...it's embarassing to say..." Konan fudged, backing away more. The men laughed.

"Come on now. You must be about sixteen? Seventeen? Fourteen at youngest." one said in a husky voice. Konan was beginning to breath quickly, the cold air searing her throat.

"I have to go now. Goodbye." she said curtly, and she backed up a little more while they laughed. She was about to laugh when two stong arms grabbed her shoulders.

"I don't think you need to go just yet, pretty princess. We won't hurt you." a deep, slow voice. Konan shuddered, trying to throw the man's arms off of her, but he was much too strong.

"Let me go." she said agressively, despite the shake in her voice. Normally, she might have added an 'asshole' or a 'shitface' on the end, but Rule number Three: never insult your attackers/stalkers. This will only aggravate them, strictly forbid it.

The man laughed as she struggled, trying to escape. She felt one of his huge hands slide inside her thick jacket and move down inside her sweaters until he found her boobs. She gasped in fury and disgust. Forgetting all the rules (4-10 were mostly centered around never ever ever ever be violent towards your agressor unless you are 100% certain that you will be able to escape after hitting them. She kicked the man hard in the shin. As his hold on her slackened and he released a grunt of pain, she wrenched herself from his grasp, grabbed her black umbrella from her bag, laughing inside as she lunged with it, poking him painfully right at the base of his ribs. He wheezed, but before he could do anything, he was hit over the head with the umbrella. Konan began running through the snow, looking behind to see them running after her. The exhileration of beating them up was lost as she saw them gaining on her- fast.

"Bitch! You can't run away!" one yelled, and when she stumbled, he caught her arm and pulled it up behind her, making her gasp in pain, and fall into the snow. He stood over her, looking like he was ready to punch her. Her eyes were closed, and her body was limp. The man stopped.

"Hey! I think she fainted!" he called. The others stopped running.

"That just makes it easier, then, doesn't it?" the one Konan had hit said, and she heard dark laughter. She felt the one standing over her bend towards her. Her eyes flew open as she brought her foot up in a swift, hard kick. The man keeled over with a pained, agonized moan, his hands at his crotch, his eyes rolled up in pain. Konan laughed as she grabbed her bag, and sprinted through the snow once more, knowing, terrified, that they were running again.

Suddenly there were yells and grunts of pain. Konan looked back, and saw her attackers...being attacked. Konan stopped, her inner self screaming at her to run, but she was confused. Was she standing on the edge of a gang war? It looked like her attackers were losing. The one she'd sacked was lying in the snow still, but was stepped on by one of the newcomers, who was leaping into the fray. There were punches flying everywhere. Konan watched, still scared, as one of the guys who had been chasing her punched one of the new ones, somebody with long hair. He staggered back as a roar of rage was heard from another new one; he leapt on the one who'd punched his friend, and the man went down, knocked out. Konan was shaking her head in confusion and fear, backing away.

Suddenly one of the new guys looked up at her and shouted: "Get her!" Konan gasped in horror. Don't tell me they're pummeling these bastards to get...ME! What the hell? Oh God, please, please, PLEASE let me out run these people! I'm so scared...WAAAAAAHHH! With her inner self bawling her eyes out and her outer self shaking from fear, Konan turned and began running through the empty park, her feet slow from cold and the dep snow. She heard thundering footsteps behind her, and she began to cry as she ran as fast as she could, dodging around trees and benches, terrified out of her mind. She suddenly tripped on a clump of ice hidden in the snow, and she fell face-first into the cold white snow that blanketed the park. She struggled to get up as the running footsteps behind her became louder, closer, but her hands just sunk into the snow. Fighting as hard as she could, she left her bag and umbrella, tore off her coat so she could move more, left three sweaters in the snow, and leapt up, running faster now that she had less clothing.

She was frozen cold, of course, and shaking from cold now, as well as tears. She was crying loudly, the big childish WAAAAAHS escaping her. She didn't fight them. She was just picking up speed, and was beginning to think confidently that she could outrun whoever was behind her, when a huge, heavy form tackled her from behind. She fell into the snow again, and shuddered as the freezing cold burned her skin; she was now only wearing her grey tights, boots, gloves, and her black short-sleeved dress with the layers and ruffles that Konan had hoped would keep her warm under her sweaters and coats. Sobs tore through her as she kicked and hit every inch of the person who was pinning her to the ground as she could.

"Get- the- fuck- away- from- me- you- bastard!" Konan shrieked as she fought to speak through her crying.

"Konan! Stop it! Ow! Konan-" How the hell did he learn my name? Konan was confused, and didn't stop hitting him. And then it hit her; "You perverted freak! You saw my fucking school Go-Card, didn't you!" she yelled, fighting her way out from under the man. (St Misery's handed out Go-Cards, with your name, a silhouette of you, and your grade on the front and the school emblem on the back. You could only take the bus if you had one) She crawled through the snow, giving the guy behind her a good kick which she hoped had hurt. She struggled to her feet as she heard more approaching footsteps thunder through the silent night; she was truly trapped now. But she refused to believe it. She ran on through the snow, her tired muscles screaming at every step, her body numb with cold, her stomach roaring with hunger, her mind filled with anger and fear.

But she didn't stop. She had heard the thunder of feet behind her, and she scooped up some snow as she fought her way through the deep snow. She turned and flung the well-compacted snowballs at her followers, noting with satisfaction as they hit her target's faces with quiet thuds, and barely listened as they swore. She could do it! She was faster than them! She ploughed through the snow. She was running through the artfully-placed trees, and then she saw it. A large, hairy wood-spider. The kind that only appear when you least want them to. It was bungeeing artistically on its string, a mere two inches from her face. Konan backed away, shrieked in a way that only bats could hear, and felt her knees give way. She collapsed onto the snow, crying, terrified, certain that she would die of a heart attack any moment now.

She had never been so mortally afraid in her entire life. Not when she was a hostage during a stick-up in a conveniance store when she was eight. Not when her mother had been dragged away, screaming, from her house. Not when she had played dead as a wolf sniffed her face when she went camping by herself. This was torture, this was millions of millions of times worse. She was afraid of the dark. She had been terrified when asked why she was sleeping outside a gas station. She had almost fainted as she heard people following her. She had almost screamed in fear when she was grabbed from behind. She had been furious when the man had touched her. She had been frightened when she thought she'd be a witness for a gang brawl. She had begun crying from fear after the new men had shouted to get her. She had cried harder, and had been scared out of her mind as she had been chased across a park. And then she'd been tackled, and then more had come to chase her, and then she'd almost run straight into a spider.

And now she was lying in the snow, shaking, crying, and more scared than she'd ever been in her life.

"Is she okay?"

"Who cares? That bitch got me right in the face with a fucking snowball!"

"I think she saw a spider, un."

"That's just typical."

"Did you get her stuff?"

"Yeah. She was wearing like, five sweaters and a jacket that could have kept a polarbear warm."

"Konan? Are you okay?"

Konan opened her eyes. Her vision was a little blurry from the tears that were still pouring down her cheeks, and her heart was pounding so loud that she could hardly hear what the man had said. Somehow their voices were familiar... she looked up. And then she frowned. It was pitch black, but she could still sort of make out a face... she shook her head, unable to see who it was, and also saying no to the question. And then she remembered that these people were going to try to hurt her. Her face contorted with rage and fear, and she punched out at the man above her, and fought to get to her feet. She staggered in the snow, and then she was off, running again, giving the spider a ten-metre wide berth. There were exasperated shouts behind her, but she ignored them.

She began to lose some of her fight. She was hungrier than she could remember being. She couldn't feel her feet or hands. She was tired, angry, and scared. She was not gonna run anymore. She stopped, crying silently as she sat down in the snow, and huddled around herself, trying to warm up slightly. She heard footsteps behind her, and she shook her head. It was over. These were the last thoughts and moments in the the life and times of Konan Amega. She gave one last thought to Pain before she faced her attackers.

I love...

"Konan! Stop running, okay? Seriously! We save your life and you thank us by hitting us and giving an unhealthy amount of exercise?"

Konan frowned. Now that she concentrated and listened, that voice sounded familiar... She turned around, staring through the darkness at the seven men who stood around her. She could tell that they were mostly tall; one was super tall, one pretty tall, two quite tall, one sort of tall, and then two kind of short.

"Who are you?" she asked in a small voice, her tone still angry, trying to muffle the undertone of terror. One of the tallish ones sighed.

"Are you serious! We get fucking beaten up for her, we chase after her through a fucking mile of fucking snow, and she asks who we are? Jashin, that's annoying!" Konan frowned. One of the shorter ones crossed his arms.

"Come on, sexy. You don't want to freeze to death, do you? Here," he said, and threw her her coat. She put it on, grateful as she suddenly felt much warmer.

"Er...thanks...?" she said uncertainly.

"She's probably got hypothermia, un." the shortest one said thoughtfully. Konan was beginning to hope...no way...that un was so...familiar. She saw the second-tallest one rub his nose.

"You almost punched out one of my nose piercings!" he said in an impressed tone, and Konan was suddenly laughing; these weren't perverted freaky stalkers! Well, maybe freaky, and sometimes perverted, and one of them had stalked somebody once, but never mind!

"Sexy-Pain?" she asked in a breathless voice, hoping beyond all hope that it was him. It was beginning to get lighter, and she could see him grinning.

"Hey there, Hottie-Konan. Figured out who we are yet?" Konan laughed, relief flooding her, making her forget her hunger for the first time in two days. She struggled to her feet, and ran at him. She threw her arms around him, almost knocking him over. He laughed and picked her up. She wrapped her legs around him, so glad it was him, and he was so warm... she began to cry again, because of how scared she'd been, and how relieved she was now.

He rubbed her back and said he loved her in her ear. Finally she stopped and rubbed her eyes like a child (she'd never grown out of the wail-scream-cry-rub-eyes habit she'd developed as a child). She looked up at Pain, who was grinning down at her. She gave him a watery smile, and kissed him quickly on the cheek before looking around. The morning light was spilling over the dingy town, and she could make out the shapes and faces of her friends; Deidara was leaning on Sasori, whose arm was around him, Kisame was deep in quiet conversation with Itachi. Hidan and Kakuzu were arguing slightly.

"Thank you." she said quietly, and they looked at her, Sasori smirking, Itachi, Kisame Kakuzu and Deidara amused, and Hidan rolling his eyes.

"Now you thank us, Konan-bitch. Before you were throwing fucking snowballs at us!" Konan laughed.

"I'm sorry! I thought you were...I don't know! Creepy people..." she said, blushing. Pain laughed.

"So, we don't count as creepy people?" he teased, and she laughed.

"Well, you are creepy, just not in the chase-after-you-and-kidnap-you way." They laughed. Konan suddenly remembered the other guys and the fight.

"Oh! What happened to the other...guys?" she asked, revulsion thick in her tone as she mentioned them. Hidan laughed.

"They ran. The one you sacked probably fucking needed to be carried. They weren't that strong, or anything." he said, and Itachi nodded.

"I bet they only came after you at night because they're not strong enough to punch out anybody who would try and stop them during the day. It's lucky we were there, because I don't think you could have taken on all five of them..." he said, and Konan nodded. He continued, with a smile. "...but you sure stopped one of their sex lives in its tracks." he said, and they roared with laughter. Konan blushed.

"Yes, well. I'm sure he deserved it." she said, and Pain laughed mirthlessly. She looked at him, and saw the sort of frightening hatred in his eyes as he thought about the creepers.

"Damn right he did." he growled. Konan sighed in agreement, and looked at Deidara. She froze when she saw blood on his face.

"Oh God...Deidara-" she began, terror mounting in her before Sasori looked at her and shook his head with a smile.

"Don't worry, sexy girl. He's okay. The guy who did it isn't though," he said, a kind of furious pride in his voice. Konan suddenly remembered what she'd seen before; a huge guy had punched a guy with long hair, who must have been Deidara, and then Sasori... Konan smiled to herself. Sasori was so in love and protective of Deidara, that guy was lucky to be alive.

They stopped outside a restaurant that had just opened, after Konan's stomach roared like a dragon as the thought of food struck her. They went in, and Konan stayed outside for a moment while she put on all her sweaters again. She was almost finished zipping up the third one when a rough hand grabbed her shoulder and spun her around. She looked up, surprised, and then terrified; it was the man she'd beaten up with her umbrella.

"Not so tough without your friends, are you?" he hissed, twisting her arms behind her painfully. Konan kicked him in the leg again, and he released her. Before she could run, however, he had grabbed her by the throat, and had brought his hand back, ready to punch her. Konan had never been punched in her life, at least not in the face, and she wasn't looking forward to the experience. The man had just started to move his hand to hit her when he suddenly shouted, was knocked aside, and fell onto the cold ground. Konan gasped (the man's hold on her throat had been pretty tight) and whirled around in time to see the orange of Pain's hair as he lunged forwards, his expression murderous. The man on the ground had leapt to his feet, fists up, but not fast enough; Pain's fists were a blur as he punched the man in the face twice, then the collarbone. The man fell again, gasping, his mouth bleeding.

"Stop it! Stop, okay?" Konan shouted before Pain could do any more. "I know he deserves it, but...don't get arrested. He's not worth it, you know." Konan said, holding Pain's hand to prevent him from punching the man again. He looked angrier than Konan had ever seen him, and she didn't blame the man from scrambling up and running. Pain sighed and looked at her.

"Are you okay?" he asked quietly, and she nodded. He kissed her, and then they walked into the restaurant to join the others.

Konan had never been so happy to see food.

"So...why are you here? I thought you'd all decided to go and stay with Sasori and Deidara." Konan asked during one of the few times when she wasn't eating. She had insisted on paying for her own food, but after deciding that the only thing she could afford was a salad, Pain rolled his eyes and made her order whatever she wanted. 'If we get back to school and the nurse says your suffering from malnutrition, I will tie you to a chair and force-feed you your least favourite foods until you're properly fed. So if you want to be tied to a chair, go ahead and order your salad.' were his exact words.

Itachi answered her question, his hands around his coffee. "Well, Pain had this idea that you weren't actually staying with a friend..." Konan reddened and looked down at her empty soup bowl.

"And of course you weren't, and were too silly to ask us for somewhere to stay..." Pain said teasingly, and Konan's ears turned pink as well as her face.

"So he dragged us out here to find you." Itachi finished. Konan, still blushing looked up.

"Thanks! But you didn't have to-"

"Yeah, that's what I thought. She's smart, she'll probably find a place to stay, like a hotel or something... Yeah right. I think you'll agree with me when I say this: we had to." Kisame said, grinning wolfishly at her. Konan was about to retort that she would have been perfectly fine, when a hand slapped over her mouth. Pain was looking at her, a smirk on his handsome face.

"Were you about to say that you'd have been perfectly fine?" he asked teasingly, and Konan nodded truthfully. He laughed.

"Well, when we finally found you, you were lying on the ground with somebody standing above you, and a bunch of other guys who were probably going to rape you around. I really don't think that's the definition of 'perfectly fine'." he said, and Konan sighed; no, no it's not.

"By the way..." Sasori said, looking over. Konan looked up at him. His usual smirk was, naturally, in place. "Did I parchance see you attack somebody ...with an umbrella?" he asked, having difficulty surpressing his laughter. The others roared with laughter as Konan sighed.

"It's gonna be a long day." she said quietly, and Pain, who had heard, laughed even harder.

Okay! Hope you liked this chapter! Thanks so much for the reviews (I LOOVE them!) And amazingly huge thanks especially to Cake-Is-Life for your adorable and really really really nice reviews! I love reading them, they make me so happy! (And I laugh, too, when I write them :3) Oh, and, to Luna's moon1100, please don't :) but thanks for the...er...support? ;P

Another chapter is coming soon, I promise! 3