innamorato di dolore 3
Okay! Yaaayyyy new chapter time! If you want to know what the title means, look it up ;3 HAhahaha, yes I will make my readers work! oh, unless you speak italian, then I guess you'll know...oh, and if it's wrong...well I tried. Online dictionaries are a little sketchy sometimes. Once again, thanks for the reviews (especially to Cake-Is-Life, your reviews always make me happy :3) Oh, and another video especially for this story: .com/watch?v=ayyScpEWD2o Ooooookay! Let's get the Christmas spirit going!
ACTION!
Konan opened her eyes slowly. Realizing she was really awake, and not still dreaming, she snapped them wide open, and sat up. It was morning. Well...mostly morning. The bright sunlight of dawn was streaming through the huge bay window, lighting up the room. Konan smiled, one that spread over her face like The Joker's. She looked around, excitement pulsing through her.
Pain was still asleep, one arm lazily on his face, shielding his eyes from the sunlight. She looked down at him, and realized with a jolt to the stomach and a small blush that he was just as hot and shirtless as he had been the night before...Christmas Eve...and it was Christmas Day! She leaped to her feet, spilling the blankets onto the floor, and shook Pain. (it was hard; he's pretty heavy) He made a funny noise and frowned, turning his head the other way. She sighed impatiently: doesn't this boob know it's Christmas morning? She sat on him, legs on either side of his chest, grabbed his shoulders, and shook him. His eyes flew open, and he looked at her, still being shaken roughly.
"Stop it." he mumbled, a small grin on his face. Konan sighed impatiently and stopped, but didn't get off. She drummed on his chest. "Guess what day it is, sleepy head?" she asked dramatically, and he frowned, thinking. And then he grinned and sat up (making her fall off him, of course) excitedly. "Christmas!" he said happily, and she rolled her eyes, still grinning.
"Yes. Now he gets it." she said, standing up and stretching. He leapt to his feet, eyeing the full stockings and the present-laden tree happily.
"OOO LOOK!" Konan exclaimed, rushing over to the counter. Pain followed her, leaping over the couch.
"What?" he asked,and she pointed excitedly at the plate of cookies and glass of milk she'd laid out for Santa: They were empty!
"Wow! That's so cool! No wonder he's not...skinny...if he does this at every house!" she said, and Pain laughed.
"Yeah," he agreed as they put the empty stuff in the sink. "There were at least twelve of those things." he said, nodding at the crumb-filled plate. Konan frowned at him.
"Things? I hope you're not reffering to my masterpieces of culinary art." she said, and he laughed. They trotted up the stairs (okay, Konan trotted, Pain just...er...went up them...) to wake everybody else up; they simply couldn't start without them, it would be unfair. And they'd probably get yelled at. They stopped at a door with a sign on it that said, 'Sasori's room. Cower in fear.' Konan grinned at Pain, and on three, they opened the door. Konan carefully looked directly at the floor as they shouted MERRY CHRISTMAS! in case there was something she really oughtn't see.
"It's safe." Pain told her quietly, and she looked up.
Sasori was looking at them with an expression identical to the one Usagi-san had (in the beginning of Junjo Romantica, episode 4), propping himself up on his elbows, his chest bare and his expression mutinous. Konan grinned as she recognized dark blonde hair that surely belonged to Deidara spilling over the second pillow. She looked at Pain, and he nodded. Leaping onto the bed with many shouts of MERRY CHRISTMAS! (and a lot of swearing from the people under them), they proceeded to shake Sasori and Deidara awake, then jumped up and down on the bed. "This is why you were single for so long, Pain." Sasori said irritably, trying to extract himself from Pain, who was sitting on him and shaking him, a very cheerful expression on his face. Konan laughed as Deidara rolled over and pulled a pillow over his face.
"Are you wearing boxers?" she asked, and he gave her a thumbs-up. She scooted to the end of the bed, got off, and grabbed his feet. With a sharp pull, she sent him rolling out of bed with a shout. Finally they succeeded in waking the other two up and getting them on their feet.
"Okay. Now we wake up the others. Aren't you happy we woke you up first?" Pain asked, and Sasori glared at him.
"Happy is not exactly the sentiment I'm feeling." he said, but Konan saw him grinning as they moved to Itachi's room and burst in.
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" they hollered, throwing themselves into the room and piling onto the bed. Itachi and Kisame were just as irritated as Sasori and Deidara had been, but they were smart about it, and got out of bed before they got completely bruised. Then the six of them crept to Hidan's door. Konan opened it silently, and they moved inside quietly. Hidan was snoring loudly, Kakuzu's hand over his mouth in a sleepy attempt to muffle him. They positioned themselves; two at the foot of the bed, two at the right, two at the left, and on Pain's signal, they all jumped onto the bed with screams of "Merry Christmas!", "Happy holidays!" and, in Sasori's case, "Wake up, you lazy bastards, it's Christmas!"
Hidan, (who was being jumped on by Konan and Pain) opened his eyes and began to swear in a way that would make a nun faint. Konan finally rolled her eyes and slapped her hand over his mouth while Pain heaved him out of bed onto the floor. Finally they were all awake and ready. They raced down the stairs (Konan tripping and falling onto Pain, who has the most miraculous reflexes on earth, and instantly grabbed her in a piggyback, instead of crashing onto the stairs) and zoomed into the living room.
"Stockings first!" Itachi shouted, and they all scampered over to their stockings. Konan took down her tights, and was grinning widely as she plunged her arm into the grey-striped, weighed-down legs. She pulled out at least three pounds of chocolate, camera film, two pairs of socks, a little doll with pretty black hair wearing a grey lace dress, and two oranges. The others had gotten similar things, except they recieved whoopee cushions instead of dolls, and more chocolate instead of film.
"Whoopee cushions? Seriously?" Kisame said in disbelief as he picked his up. Konan grinned and crawled over to the big Christmas tree.
"Can we open them yet? Can we? Can we? Canwecanwecanwe-"
"I can see you've already had your candycane." Itachi said with a grin.
"And everybody else's I bet." Sasori said under his breath.
"Okay. Alphabetical order, un!" Deidara said, and everybody laughed, because, of course he would be first.
"No way! It has to be fair!" Pain said, Konan and everybody else nodded importantly. Deidara grinned and asked what they suggested.
"What about a competition? Like...Chubby Bunny!" Konan said, and everybody laughed, agreeing. Konan zipped into the kitchen, and grabbed two big bags of marshmallows. She had only played once, but she was pretty sure that she wouldn't lose. She let Hidan start. He put a marshmallow in his mouth.
"Chubby Bunny." Two.
"Chubby Bunny." Three.
"Chu-ubby Bu-unny." Four.
"Chuuubeey Bunnyyy" Five.
"Chueebuee." Six.
"Chueeeeeeh" They laughed.
"So, that's five." Pain said as Hidan chewed up the marshmallows and (with some effort) swallowed.
Sasori only made it to four, Deidara got to six, Kakuzu tied with Sasori, Itachi quit at five, Kisame surprised them all and got to seven (big mouth, I guess), and Pain got to six. Konan took a marshmallow, her fourth one, and crammed it in the already tightly-packed space in her mouth.
"Chubby Buhhnny." Another.
"Chuhhhbyy Buhhhnyy." Another one. Konan was anounciating the best she possibly could.
"Chuuuubeeeehh Buhhhhhhneeeeey." One more, Konan thought, and she would tie with Kisame. She stuffed it in her mouth.
"Chuuhhbe-" her muffled voice stopped abruptly.
The others looked at her. Her eyes were wide, she was frowning. Her expression changed almost immediately to shocked. Her chest began to pop jerkily, and her eyes were starting to water. Pain knew something was seriously wrong when she started to turn a delicate lavender colour. He jumped up, pulled her up by the arms, moved behind her, made a fist, put it to her stomach, just above the navel, placed his other hand on top, bent her over slightly, then jerked inwards, forcing air up her windpipe. Six slightly-chewed marshmallows popped out of her mouth.
"There's another one still inside!" Itachi said, moving forwards. Everybody was staring; well, it's not every day your friend starts choking. Konan's eyes were wide, but distant, and starting to roll up; she was likely to pass out soon.
"Again!" Kakuzu said, and Pain nodded, biting his lip as he jerked his fist upwards into Konan's stomach. Nothing happened, except a few tears sliding down Konan's cheeks. Pain gritted his teeth and did it again, hard. With the force of an airgun, the last marshmallow popped out and flew across the room, hitting the opposite wall.
Konan collapsed to her knees, holding her stomach and gasping. Pain fell onto the sofa, looking just as shocked as everybody else. Konan had gotten her breath back, and had wiped away the tears. She breathed in gratefully, and looked up. Everybody was staring at her.
"Thanks." she said breathlessly to Pain, and he waved her gratitude down with a lazy hand.
"Just...don't do that again, okay?" he asked, and she nodded seriously.
"So...I vote Konan wins." Kisame said, and they all nodded. Konan sighed, rubbing her ribs with a weak smile. She looked at Pain.
"I would not like to be punched by you. Ever." she said, wincing as she foresaw serious bruising on her ribs. Pain laughed loudly.
"Well...scare me like that again, and I just might." he said, pretending to threaten her, and she grinned.
"Soo...present time?" she asked, and Sasori laughed.
"Yes. Present time."
Konan looked at the mountain of presents.
"Can I open one?" she asked, and they all nodded, grinning. She pulled one towards her. Kisame. She dug through the pile until she found one for her. She picked it up.
"Oooh! It's mine, un!" Deidara said, and she smiled at him.
"Aww! Thanks, Deidara!" she said, and Pain laughed.
"You haven't even opened it yet!" he said, and she bit back another grin. She carefully opened the paper.
"Any time before school fucking starts, princess." Hidan said, and she laughed, then looked at him, shocked.
"Princess? That's new." she said, and he grinned at her.
"Well, it's Christmas. And you were just choking. So...Princess. Now hurry the fuck up!"
Konan tore the paper off, and gasped in surprise: Deidara's present was a beautiful, white clay bird. She grinned when she saw that the large wings had hinges on them. She turned the bird around, so it faced them, and moved the wings gingerly. Then she laughed, so happy: On the bird's back, there was a picture frame, with glass and everything, and inside was a picture of her, Deidara and Sasori. She recognized it as the one they'd taken at Halloween, saying 'Sasori's hot' at the camera.
"Thank you! Thank you so much!" she cried, sliding the wings back in place (when they covered the picture, it looked like a perfectly normal bird statue) and crawling over with it to hug Deidara, who was grinning.
"You like it, un?" he asked, and she nodded enthousiastically.
"It's really beautiful!" she said, and he grinned again, tugging playfully on one of her pigtails. Kisame opened the next present; it was to him from Pain.
He unwrapped it, looked at the cover of the box, and laughed; "An official mini air guitar? Gee, you shouldn't have!" he said, and Pain grinned.
"I didn't." he said, and Kisame opened the box, confused. Inside was a little clear guitar, no bigger than Kisame's forearm. But when Konan looked closer, she could see that it wasn't empty. Kisame took one look and laughed.
"Vodka, right?" he asked, and Pain nodded, grinning.
"It's from Germany. I ordered it ahead." he explained, when they gave him a weird look. Kisame thanked him and promised to drink it on special occasions. Pain snorted.
"No way. You'll probably drink it all tonight, knowing you."
Kisame winked as Deidara crawled forwards and grabbed a present adressed to him. "Oh great. It's from my mother, un." he said, and they grinned. He opened it, gasped in horror, and then rolled his eyes with a sigh.
"Typical. Mothers will be mothers, un." he said, and they looked at what he was holding. Sasori gave a great shout of laughter, earning him a hard push from Deidara (well deserved). Deidara's mom had sent him two pairs of festive boxers with little snowmen on them.
"Wait...those are pretty rude snowmen." Konan pointed out, and Deidara looked again. The snowmen were making a rather rude hand gesture up at him. He grinned, and looked in the wrapping paper for a card. He found one, and read it out loud.
"Hey Deidara. Merry Christmas. I know you'll think these are from Mom. Well, she was the one who suggested boxers, but I was the one to pick them. Hope they're not too big or whatever. Merry Christmas again, from Dad + Jedediah. Xoxo, all that shit."
Hidan laughed. "At least they're not from your mom." he said, and Deidara shrugged with a smile, tossing the wrapping paper into the 'paper pile' and putting the present and card behind him.
Hidan grabbed one of his presents, and announced that it was from Konan. Konan crossed her fingers, hoping he'd like it; it was pretty dificult getting a present for Hidan. He took off the wrapping paper, and looked at the book.
"It's kind of a funny story. What's it about?" he asked and Konan blushed, worried to no end that he wouldn't like it.
"It's about suicide. I've read it before, and it seriously makes you think you're the one that needs help." she said, and he laughed, looking at her. "But you are the one that needs help, Princess Konan." he said, and she laughed.
"Do you think you'll like it?" she asked tentatively, and he nodded, grinning and thanking her.
Phew. Am I the only one who breathes a sigh of relief when they give somebody a present, and it doesn't 'accidentally' get tossed into a wood chipper? Am I the only one? Probably.
Pain took a present next.
"Okay...this is from...I don't know.." he said, frowning as he turned the package over, looking for a 'from' card, or something. He shrugged and opened it. It was a rather large, grey book. Pain read the title quickly, and then laughed.
"It's from my aunt. It's Defiant Child: A Parent's Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder" he read, and they all laughed.
"I think she's sent me my mother's present...normally she would have gotten me something like 31 reasons parents suck, or something." he said, grinning and flipping through the book. Itachi leaned forwards and grabbed a present adressed to him.
He was grinning as he read, "From Kakuzu" while ripping off the grey wrapping paper. Two cube-shaped speakers fell out, along with a packet of multi-colored Sharpies.
"Decorate them yourself. They're portable speakers. There's a gift reciept and a return-by thing, too, if you want to get something else." Kakuzu said, and Itachi thanked him.
Sasori waded into the large pile of presents, and opened a puffy one that was adressed to him.
"It's from...Pain." he said, and Pain grinned at Konan, leaning over and whispering 'This is gonna be good'. She watched as Sasori opened it. He had to unfold a lot of it, and in the end, had to hold the top of it, standing up, so they could see what it was. It was a shower curtain. But not just any shower curtain, no. This one had three life-size, very realistic pictures on it. In the middle, they all recognized Sasori. He was facing away, wearing his grey longsleeve, and his head was tilted to one side, as if he was looking at something. On the right side of the shower curtain, Deidara was looking at them, scowling and wearing a red towel around his hips. It seemed to be taken just as he walked out of the bathroom. On the other side of Sasori was Konan in a towel, looking shocked. Everybody, after a moment of silence, burst into laughter.
"How did you make that?" Konan asked after she had gotten her breath back. Pain was grinning.
"I took pictures of you and Deidara and Sasori, and then I just edited out the backgrounds, and then scanned it in to a computor, and ordered the shower curtain from some company. It arrived last week." he explained. Sasori was still laughing as he looked at Deidara and Konan's varying expressions on the new curtain.
Kakuzu grabbed a present, and opened it. It was a cook book, called How to stay reasonably healthy in 10 easy steps. It was from Kisame, who swore that it really worked...sort of.
It was Konan's turn again. She grabbed a long, skinny present that said it was from Sasori. She unwrapped it, excitement mounting as her fingers fumbled with the paper. The long, black, skinny object rolled out, and she picked it up, looking confused.
"A...samurai sword?" she asked, looking at Sasori, who was looking excited, like he was waiting for a hilarious punch line he knew was coming.
"Open it, open it!" he said, and she did as he said. She slid the cover off of it, and gasped when she realized it wasn't a blade at all; she pushed a small button, and the large black umbrella popped open. There was a brief moment of absolute quiet. And then Konan burst out laughing. She remembered Sasori's exact words in the restaurant, barely three days previously; 'By the way...did I parchance see you attack somebody...with an umbrella?' They were all laughing so hard that they had quite a bit of trouble catching their breath.
"I love it! I love it, I really do!" she said happily, and Sasori grinned.
"That's good. And just think: the next time you feel like beating the stuffing out of somebody with an umbrella, you'll have a nice, threatening-looking one!" he said, and she burst out laughing again.
Finally the huge pile of presents was shrinking. Kisame had gotten a Desperate Housewives season from Deidara, a new belt with slashes through the leather and a rough hand-made carving of a skull on the front from Pain, a large ornate dagger (from Konan), several books, and wireless headphones from Itachi.
Kakuzu had unwrapped a black sweater with a fake zipper, that when undone, revealed an under layer of rather realistic bones and muscles and organs and such from Hidan, a photo album with slashes through the cover and pages, so the people in the pictures would look a bit mauled, (from Konan) a book about the dangers of happiness from Itachi.
Hidan had recieved a season of Hetalia World Series from Sasori, a journal titled People whose funerals I'd hate to attend from Kisame, a black notebook with Why I shouldn't kill somebody today on the cover, a box shaped like a skull from Pain, and Make-your-own-fatal-wounds kit from Kakuzu.
Itachi got a yoga kit from Konan, a Haircuts for the stylish studs of 2010 book from Sasori, barber's knives that were exact replicas of Sweeney's from Pain, and a black longsleeve with Uchiha on the back from his brother.
Deidara had gotten a sculpting set from Kakuzu, a wallet covered with little paintings of a Chibi Deidara from Kisame, a black t-shirt that had odd japanese writing on the front, and it said 'read it sideways' at the top. They had all bent their heads to one side, where the odd characters suddenly became english, and it said 'you look stupid'. Naturally, that one was from Hidan. Konan had made him a cd, called Frivolousness or Okay moan. "It's an anagram." she explained, and there was a big Oohhhh.
Sasori had unwrapped a black ballerina dancer that Konan (who loved that's what he/she said jokes) had got him, after adding a recording of everybody saying something funny, then her voice saying 'that's what she said' right after. When he pressed the button on the base of the statuette, it would say in Pain's voice first; "Don't be a baby! Just swallow it!" then in Hidan's voice; "Why's it so fucking hard?" then in Kisame's voice; "More. More. More. Okay that's enough." then in Itachi's voice; "If you do that again, I'll break it in half, bastard." then in Kakuzu's voice; "Come on. It's not even worth the ten cents you paid for it. It's all limp." finally, Deidara's. Sasori insisted that he would probably just get hard from hearing that over and over again. Deidara said, a little breathlessly (he had just been running); "Oh sorry. You're all wet now, aren't you? I could stop, un..." Deidara had made him a scorpion (like his last name) sculpture out of white clay, which opened with a metal S that came with it on a chain. When opened, a tiny speaker inside would begin to play various songs depending on what day of the week or year you opened it. (For example, on the little calendar it came with, it said that on Monday Janurary 7th, it would play 'I want to know what love is' by Foreigner, whereas on Saturday april 29th it would play 'Sexyback' by Justin Timberlake. And there were no repeats.)
Konan would never cease to be amazed at how intricate and time-consuming Deidara's presents must have been to make.
Pain got a book called What do your piercings say about you? from Kakuzu, a motorcycle repair kit from Kisame, a black leather jacket with slashes through it from Deidara, an I'm too sexy for you shirt from Sasori, a motorcycle calandar with a mini silver motorbike from Itachi, My Chick Bad fake tattoos from Hidan, and Konan gave him a black box with a scribble-lines sketch of him engraved into the front in silver, and it was locked. She said she'd give him the key later, because she'd forgotten to wrap it.
Konan had unwrapped a large volume of Fmylife from Hidan, including one where somebody didn't get a part in a play because the casting director said that they had 'the emotional range of a turnip' and one where somebody's girlfriend farted loudly just as they were proposing. Pain had gotten her a large black sketchbook with her name and Toujours engraved in silver on the cover, as well as a beautiful silver necklace with a flower the exact shape of Konan's manditory paper one dangling from it. She hugged him, knowing that he must have made it himself, and proceeded to read the engraved words on the back; I love...she suddenly realized that there was a tiny button on it. She clicked it, and the end of a usb stick poked out. Determined to figure it out later, she opened her other presents. She got 'Can't touch this' underwear from Sasori, pretty flower bracelets from Kakuzu, six Emily the Strange t-shirts from Itachi, and a crowbar from Kisame, with advice to use it on Pain if he ever dumped her. "Wow. Thanks for your emotional support." she said drily, and he laughed. Finally Konan grabbed the last present to her from under the tree. Her eyes widened in surprise; "It's from Daddy..." she said, ripping open the brown paper. A white card with a small Santa on it flew out. She opened it, and began to read out loud.
"My dear Konan. Merry Christmas. I hope this arrives in time. How is school? I know I haven't written to you in a while, but I'm afraid I've been a little busy. I hope you've managed to make a friend or two, if you're lucky. If not, don't worry. They're probably just shy." Konan snorted, but continued reading. "Oh, Happy Birthday as well. I'm sorry to say that I was unable to send you a present...As if. He probably forgot. ...Hope school is okay. Ah, yes, I almost forgot. You're rooming with boys, due to a rather amusing accident...Oh wow. That's a late warning. Be safe, and all that kind of thing. You know I hate talking about that. In any case, I hope you are having happy holidays. I'm sorry you can't stay with me during Christmas, but as you know I'm away. Not to put pressure on you, but I hope you return to the senses I hope you have, and get a respectable boyfriend before I next visit. Heaven only knows what your mother would say if you ever show her that tattoo, now I put my mind to it... Never fear, darling, I won't visit for quite some time. Business in this area is rather good, and I know you are a DIY diva. Hope you like your present. See you sometime... Merry Christmas, xoxo...Hope you're not ill, Love From Daddy." she finished and laughed slightly; this was just like him.
No 'I miss you's or 'hope to hear from you soon's. She knew he probably didn't hope to hear from her anytime soon. She had come to face the hard truth that her father didn't much want to remember the daughter he'd had with the mentally disturbed wife he'd like to forget even more. No, it was all looking ahead, not dwelling on the past for her father. He didn't even stop to dwell on the present much...
She blinked and looked down at her present. She picked it up out of the brown paper, a small smile on her face. At least her Daddy never failed to amaze her with the perfection of his presents; this time he had gotten her a pair of grey fabric flats with purple ribbon and polka-dots on them, a pale grey chiffon dress and a matching black one, and a lovely grey velveteen rabbit.
"So...what are the chances of your father calling Pain respectable?" Sasori asked, filling the brief silence that had filled the room after the reading of the rather detached father-to-daughter letter. Konan looked up with a grin.
"Not likely. But...if I'm lucky, you'll never have to meet him." she said, looking seriously at Pain, who was leaning casually against the sofa. He flashed her a grin, which she returned, hugging the velveteen rabbit (like the one in the children's story, the one that had made her cry) to her and putting the clothes and shoes to one side.
"Okay. Now..." she said, looking at all of them.
"SsssssssNOWBALL FIGHT!" Sasori shouted, leaping up and sprinting away to get his jacket and gloves and boots. Everybody else followed him. Konan stood up, smiling. Pain grabbed her wrist lazily as she moved to follow, and pulled her down onto him on the couch. She looked up at him, and the second she did, he was kissing her, bending her back down onto the pillows of the couch. She kissed him back, happy but slightly bewildered. He finally pulled away, The Something glaring her right in the face, smiling slightly. He kissed her quickly again, and again before speaking quietly, tugging gently on one of her ribboned pigtails.
"Remember you promised never to scare me again?" he asked, and Konan nodded, frowning faintly. He grinned, kissing her again.
"Well. You almost broke that promise, silly. Twice in one week you could have died. That's twice you scared me. Two times is two times too many, little girl." he said, pretending to scold her. Konan sighed, pulling him down closer.
"I know. I'm sorry. But you know, I'm not trying to choke or get attacked and things. But it's nice you're worried." she said, and Pain shook his head slowly.
"No. Not nice. I think I'll die of a heart attack before I graduate if you keep this up." he said grinning, and Konan giggled.
"By the way...what's the usb on the necklace you gave me for?" she asked, but he just pressed a finger to her lips teasingly before kissing her. Still kissing her, he pulled her into a sitting position again and scooped her up, walking over to where their boots, gloves and coats were. The others had already sprinted out towards the large snow-covered field. So they wouldn't be interrupted. For once, Konan thought with a smile as she kissed Pain softly as he pulled on her gloves for her.
Awwww! Okay. Seriously. Is SEXY-PAIN the best, or what? I mean, exactly how many guys will pull on your gloves for you while you're too busy kissing them to do it yourself? Is it just me, or is that adorable? It's just you...
Konan ignored the arguing voices in her head as she and Pain opened the door and stepped out into the snow. Christmas Day; 11:16 am.
Over and out.
"Okay. Should we do this in teams, or every man-"
"And girl." Konan interjected. Itachi sighed.
"Right. Or every man or girl for themselves?" "How about we do it in teams first, then separate?" Kakuzu said, and the others nodded.
"That way," Sasori began with a grin.
"If you have a sucky partner, you can pummel them after." They laughed, and decided how to split themselves into teams of two.
"Okay. We could do it by age, so the youngest is with the oldest, or something..." Kisame suggested, and they agreed.
So the teams were Pain/Konan, Kakuzu/Deidara, Kisame/Hidan and Sasori/Itachi. After listening to stories of previous snowball fights her friends had had, Konan had decided that Pain was definitely dangerous when it came to this. And the Sasori/Itachi union would be serious trouble; both had amazing accuracy and stealth. Deidara was the best by far, but Kakuzu was sure to slow him down, because he couldn't make a snowball properly to save his life. She wasn't too worried about Kisame and Hidan. They were good, but she'd be more worried if it was a wrestling competition. And as for herself? She had never had enough frineds to throw snowballs at, so all her experiences involved hitting roofs and scaring cats.
"So. Rules are; if you're hit ten times by the same person, you're out. If you're out, you have to sit on the fence-" Kisame pointed to a long fence about thirty feet away. "-and wait for your partner to save you. They can save you by hitting somebody else ten times." he explained, and they all grinned; this wouldn't be too easy.
"Your team wins if both of you are still in, and if everybody else is out." Pain said, and Konan bit back a grin; it would be next to impossible to win against all of these guys.
"Okay. In ten minutes, the game is on. We'll stop in..say...an hour. The boundaries are..." Sasori looked around vaguely. "Okay. Ten feet into the woods is out of bounds because of bears. The lake is also out, and the fence, and the end of the field." Konan looked around the area he'd planned out; it was huge.
"So. Ten minutes to plan strategy and to build forts, snowballs, etc, un." Deidara said, and they all nodded and set off in various directions. Konan followed Pain to the corner of the boundaries, the edge of the woods and the end of the field. He explained on the way that it was better to have a base in a corner, so the other team couldn't sneak up on you without you seeing them. Konan took his hand as they walked, looking at her feet as they ploughed through the snow. It hadn't snowed the night before, so the snow only went up to the middle of her shin, but it was still a bit tricky to walk through.
"So...do you have a plan, or are we just..?" Konan asked, looking up at Pain, who grinned wolfishly.
"Oh, don't worry. We're just..." he said, and she sighed. He grabbed her and swung her around, ignoring her protests and yells. He finally put her down, only to tip her chin up with a hand and kiss her.
"Merry Christmas, Konan." he said, pulling her down in the snow and kissing her again. She kissed him back, confused but not minding (Seriously, who would stop SEXY-PAIN, right? ;3). Finally she managed to speak.
"Um...not that I want you to stop, but it's starting soon.." she mumbled, cheeks pink and hair ruffled. Pain looked at her and sighed, but grinned. "Yeah, I know. Don't worry. Oh...thanks for the present." he said, and she looked confused.
"What do you mean?" she asked, and he sighed, smiling.
"Well...you did the cover of the box yourself, right?" he asked, and she nodded, still not sure where this was going.
"Well, I just wanted to thank you. It made me happy." he said earnestly, and she blushed and looked at her knees.
"Oh, well...you're welcome...Thankyou for your present." she said, and laughed when he waved his hand airily.
"Yeah, yeah yeah. But...what's inside the box?" he asked curiously. Konan smiled, and tapped a finger thoughtfully on her mouth.
"Hmm. I can't recall." she said and he laughed.
"Okay. So. If we're gonna win this, we've got to think of a strategy before the game starts." he said, getting down to business. Konan nodded seriously, and he grinned at her.
"Have you got an idea?" he asked, and she was shocked. "
What are you talking about? You're the mastermind behind this one, Moriarty." she said, and he grinned.
"Okay. After about five years of this, I've got a few strategies on all of them." he said, and she listened attentively.
"Okay. Deidara is by far the best, but if you find out his strategy, and completely ruin it, he can't think of a new one fast enough. Sasori's weakness is Deidara; no matter if they're on the same team or not, if Deidara is about to get completely pummelled, Sasori loses his concentration, and won't notice if you just sneak up on him from behind. Kakuzu's the worst at this, but he's really hard to find. He's the one who, after all the good players have been taken out, will still be in the game, but not be much good. As long as you find him and get him early on, he won't be any trouble. Hidan throws really hard, but he never has a plan. He just goes in full-force. Get behind him, out-smart him, and then he's pretty easy. Itachi's really smart. He has loads of plans under plans under plans under plans, and he's fast and has good aim. So he's hard to get, but if both of his take him by surprise, you never know. Kisame shouldn't be too hard, but never attack him from the front, because he can throw further than you'd think. And...that's it. Are you good at snowball fights?" Pain asked finally, and Konan twitched; well, that was the only question she hadn't much wanted to answer.
"Er...sure..." she said awkwardly, and he grinned.
"Never mind. Just relax. Now, if we make lots of snowballs in advance, it won't help us if we go over there," he pointed to the middle of the field. "and they are sitting here waiting for somebody else to grab them and hit us with them. Of course, everybody has that problem, but still, there has to be alternative..." he continued thoughtfully. Konan watched him as he spoke, making snowballs absent-mindedly.
"READY?" They both looked up: Kisame was waving at them. They waved back.
"OKAY! SASORI?" They saw him turn and wave back to Sasori, who was about four hundred metres away.
"GO!" he shouted, and the game was on.
"So...what's the plan again?" Konan asked as they stood up. Pain grinned, watching the others do the same.
"Okay. We're going to stick together at the beginning, and watch each other's back. We might split up later for diversional tactics, but we'll try not to get too far away. If either of us gets out, then the other does whatever it takes to get them back in again. If both of us get out, then...well that would suck. Just...follow me, okay?" he said, flashing her a cheerful grin as he ran into the forest.
Konan nodded and followed. Since the boundary was ten feet in, they stuck to it, trying to use the trees as cover. The forest was immediately thick with trees the moment you stepped in, and although it's useful, you can't see a darn thing around you. Can't see the forest for the trees...Konan thought with a smile as she followed Pain. They stopped to load up a bit on snowballs, packing them tightly and holding three (one in their throwing hand, two in their non-dominant). Then they made their way closer to the edge of the field, staying behind the trees to stay out of view.
"Okay. You look, your hair doesn't stand out quite so much." Pain said quietly, and Konan nodded. She moved quietly around her tree and looked. She couldn't see anybody.
"Nobody's ther- huh?" she was cut across as a snowball flew just over her head, and Pain shouted; "Konan, duck!"
She ducked, then whirled around. Hidan had been just on the other side of her tree. He was now swearing and laughing, but was about to pound her with snow. She insinctively grabbed the lowest branch of the tree, climbing up. She quickly shook the branch above Hidan hard, so a huge avalanche of snow cascaded down on him, burying him in snow. She could hear Pain laughing as she started coming down.
"Freeze!" she heard him say, so she froze, and looked below her quickly. She was hidden from view, thanks to the thick lower branches. She couldn't see Pain, but she did see Kisame, Hidan's parter, walking just under her to help Hidan out of the snow. She counted his steps; One...two...three! On the third one, she jumped out of the tree, landing smartly on him, causing him to collapse to the ground in surprise, and then ran off to find Pain.
"Come on, silly." he said, suddenly appearing from her right and grabbing her hand, pulling her along with him. "Sasori's over here. Be careful. If we see him, we'll split up and take him from two sides." Pain said, and Konan nodded: this was starting to get more exciting. It was sort of like a mix of Hide and go Seek, Camoflage, Tag, and Capture the flag: you had to hide well, but be able to move a lot without being seen. You also had to run and get people while carrying snowballs.
And for all you know, you could be running straight into a trap.
After half an hour, Hidan and Kakuzu were out, Hidan by Deidara and Kakuzu by Pain. Konan had been hit twice by Hidan, once by Kisame, six times by Sasori, seven by Deidara, and had hit each of them back five times. Pain had been hit four times by Sasori, six by Deidara, twice by Itachi, and once by Konan (by mistake). Pain and Konan were standing in a small clearing, four feet from the edge of the woods, looking around, snowballs in hand. Konan's feet had gone numb long ago, but whatever. At least she was moving, and not sitting on a fence. Suddenly, there came a rustle and a crunch of a footstep to her left. She moved behind a tree, and saw Pain do the same. They saw Deidara come into the clearing, grinning and looking around, snowballs ready. Pain caught her eye and pointed at him, as he turned and exposed his back. Konan nodded, stepped out, and hit him square between the shoulders with a flurry of snowballs.
She laughed as he span around, grinning, saw her, and then got hit by Pain. Sasori suddenly burst into the clearing, seeing Deidara getting pummelled. Snowballs began flying everywhere. Sasori was so fast at making new snowballs while dodging ones being thrown at him, that Konan was out pretty quickly. She told Pain, then ran off across the field to sit on the fence, were Hidan and Kakuzu were still sitting.
"Hey, bitch. Who got you out?" Hidan greeted her as she struggled to climb up onto the fence.
"Um..Sasori." she said, scrambling up. She had just managed to sit precariously on the top when there was a great shout of truimf, and she overbalanced in surprise. Hidan and Kakuzu could only stare in shock as she tipped backwards with a yell, and fell off the fence into the snowdrift below her. She was now very cold, three feet deep in snow, looking bewildered up at them, on the wrong side of the fence. There was a long pause, and then Hidan and Kakuzu burst out laughing. Deidara came over, looking grumpy, then stopped and asked what was so funny. Hidan, who was happy because he was back in, told him to look over the fence. Deidara clambered up, sat next to Kakuzu, and looked behind him, where Konan was struggling to extract herself from the snowdrift.
"Oh wow. Smile, Konan, un." he said, grinning down at her and brandishing a camera. Konan looked up in time to see it flash. She struggled to her feet (which promptly sank into the snow) and stretched.
"Okay. Watch out, Deidara. Or you might be the next one to fall off." she said, smiling and clambering back onto the fence. She put her hands on the top, and jumped, trying to find grip on the planks of wet wood. She managed to get her stomach on. Then she swung over her left leg and...lost her balance. Just as she was about to fall off, however, she grabbed Deidara's jacket. He yelled, and began to fall as well. Konan was hanging head-first off the fence, only her knee and below clinging on, and one hand grasping Deidara's jacket pocket desperately. Deidara was clutching the fence, his legs and butt hanging off thanks to Konan. Kakuzu, who could have helped, was roaring with laughter.
"This...isn't funny, un!" Deidara hissed, straining to keep his grip on the fence. He was actually supporting 90% of Konan's weight, and most of his own wiht only his arms. Pretty impressive.
"Deidara...please don't drop me." Konan said, looking at the three-feet drop between her head and stepped-on snow, which was pounded down and would definately hurt to fall head-first onto.
"I know...but if you'd just fallen properly and not grabbed me, we wouldn't be having this problem, un." Deidara said, trying not to laugh.
"Need help?" Kisame asked mildly. Konan looked up (an impressive feat from her angle) to see his feet to his knees. Wow.
"Er...yes, please." she said, and he laughed. He grabbed Konan around the waist and lifted her up. She released her grip on Deidara, and he managed to pull himself back up. Kisame put Konan back on the fence, and she thanked him.
"Your face is red." he commented, and she scowled.
"Right. And naturally, it couldn't possibly be for the obvious reason that I've just been hanging upside-down for the last five minutes. No, it has to be for some other, more sinister reason like I'm wearing Itachi's underwear or something." she sniffed, to the general amusement of her companions.
"Are you?" Kakuzu asked, and she snorted.
"Absolutely." she said sarcastically, and they all laughed.
Pain eventually managed to get Konan back on by pummelling Sasori, who had also got Kisame out. They were finally too exhausted to continue, and they all trooped back inside, panting, cold, and grinning.
"Lunch time!" Kisame announced, and (after struggling to remove sopping wet gloves, boots, and coats) they all raced into the kitchen.
"Who's turn is it to cook, anyways?" Itachi asked, and they all shrugged.
"Well, whatever. There's loads of KD around here. We can just make a whole bunch and then decide what to do before dinner." Sasori said. Soon, at least six boxes of KD were boiling away in various pots, and they were all spread out in the living room.
"So, what should we do?" Konan asked, pulling aimlessly on the edge of her sock.
"We could have a scavenger hunt...you know, like the ones they have at the end of year party at school, un." Deidara suggested, tugging slightly on his long hair.
"Sure! Why don't we split ourselves up into two teams, and everybody writes one item for the other team. And then we can go out into the town if we have to, and then be back by six." Sasori said, walking in with huge bowls of macaroni and cheese, and handing them out.
"They have a scavenger hunt at the end of the year?" Konan asked, poking her macaroni with her fork.
"Yeah, they're fun. The school's divided into lots of groups. Usually there's a prize for the best team in each grade or something like that. You just go around the school, getting pictures with certain teachers, autographs from first years, somebody's underwear...stuff like that." Pain explained, and Konan nodded.
"Alright then, let's do it." Hidan said with a grin.
"That's what he said." Kakuzu said in a low voice behind him. Hidan whirled around, a grin on his face.
"You know what, 'Kuzu? Eat a dick." They all laughed.
After the huge bowls of macaroni were (miraculously) gone, they split themselves up into two teams.
"How about we do this evenly, so all the crappy people (that's you, Konan) aren't all on one team." Hidan said, and Konan flung a pillow at him, which caught him in the back of the head.
"Okay, fine. We could do team captains and just pick, un." Deidara said casually.
"Good. So who are the captains?" Konan sighed; it seriously takes forever to make a desicion around here. Finally Sasori and Itachi were decided as captains. Sasori predictibally chose Deidara first, Itachi (just as predictibally) chose Kisame. Then Sasori chose Pain, and Itachi chose Hidan. Sasori chose Konan (and then proceeded to tell her it was only because she was hot, which she responded to by elbowing him sharply and glaring at the ground) and Itachi chose Kakuzu. Somehow Konan got the feeling that the teams were not quite as even as they'd hoped, but she wasn't about to suggest they strain their brains thinking up a different division tactic. The two teams grabbed a sheet of paper each and pens, and Itachi's team left to write up their scavenger list in the kitchen.
"Okay. We need ten things, and there are four of us. So each of us thinks up one, then we all vote for two more." Sasori said, and they all nodded.
"We might as well try and make certain ones specifically harder for certain people, just for fun." Pain said casually, and they grinned.
"Okay. First one...We've got two cameras, right?" Sasori asked, and Pain nodded.
"Good. So the first one will be a picture of Kisame kissing a girl." Sasori said, smirking, and they grinned.
"Second...a picture of the inside of the girl's bathroom in the bar, complete with girls, un." Deidara said, brushing the hair away from his face as he spoke. Konan laughed; this was such a typical 'boys-have-cooties' kind of thing.
"Third...a reciept from the drug store for an Elle magazine, tampons, nailpolish, and pink eyeshadow." Konan said, and the boys laughed and Pain wrote it down.
"Fourth one...a picture of one or more of them mooning/flashing an elderly person." Pain said, and Konan snorted.
"Poor elderly person. Let's hope they don't start pushing daisies because of the shock." Pain grinned at her.
"Fifth.." Sasori began, thinking. "...a picture of all of them with Santa not wearing his beard." They scribbled it down, grinning; Santas would be pretty hard to find today, since it's a holiday. Luckily the stores near Sasori and Deidara's house stay open on Christmas, because of huge numbers of volunteers.
"Sixth, a phone number of a hot guy/girl, un." Deidara said, and Sasori bit back a grin.
"Eighth..." Konan thought. What would be hard, but possible to get in three hours? Er... "...girl's underwear in every colour of the rainbow, tops and bottoms." Konan said, and Pain snorted with laughter.
"I'm really glad you're on this team, Konan." he said. She asked why. He looked at her, grinning. "Because, as a girl, you know exactly what guys fnd most embarassing or difficult to get hold of." Konan smiled and sighed.
"Well...it's never too late for a sex change if you've finally realized that girls are better..." she said, and they cracked up.
"That's okay. I'm happy being the sexy beast that I am, thankyou very much." Sasori said, and Deidara rolled his eyes with a smirk.
"Nine. A picture of all of them in fishnet tights and heels, doing the cancan in the middle of the street." Pain said, and Konan, imagining this, had lots of trouble stifling her laughter.
"Okay. Two more. Any ideas?" Sasori asked, and they all thought.
"Picture of them hula hooping in the snow?" Konan suggested, and they agreed and wrote it down.
"Get ten people to slap their butt without asking, un." Deidara said. They immediately wrote it down, calling it genius.
"Ready?" Pain called to the group in the kitchen. There was a muffled shout of laughter, then "Yes..."
They met up, exchanged sheets, agreed to meet here in three hours, and the losing team would have to run all the way across the field and back completely naked except for girl's underwear (for Konan, it would be boy's), and it would be caught on video. Konan's team immediately flew outside and under a street lamp to read the list.
One: Get a piggy-back ride from a complete stranger.
Two: Have a guy give you a condom.
Three: Have a guy give you his underwear.
Four: In public, shout I LOVE SEX! Seriously, I must be a nymphomaniac!
Five: Get a kiss on the cheek from a stranger.
Six: Re-enact the kiss scene from Romeo and Juliet, with pictures of the crowd.
Seven: Use a cheesy pick-up line on a stranger.
Eight: Get a picture of one of you kissing the butt of another.
Nine: Get a girl to put money down your pants.
Ten: Get a pick-up-and-spin-around-hug from a gay/bi STRANGER.
Konan stared at the list. It wasn't so bad, but it wasn't nearly as bad as the one they'd given the other team.
"Okay. I think Konan's going to be doing most of these.." Sasori said finally, and she looked up, surprised and irritated.
"Why me?" she demanded, and he smirked, pointing out numbers one, two, three, five and six.
"So what? I'm sure any of you guys could...get a piggy back and a condom and...a kiss on the cheek...and why do I have to do the Romeo and Juliet thing?" she asked immaturely. Pain laughed.
"Seriously. We need pictures of a crowd watching. I doubt we'd get much of a crowd if it was, say, me and Deidara. I think we'd just get stared at." Deidara laughed.
"Well, I guess we'd better get started. Let's go." Konan grumbled, and the guys gave each other grins behind her back as they followed her down the snowy street. This had better be worth it. If I don't get a nice video of the other team running around in girl's underwear in the snow, I will be very, very vexed. Konan thought as she ambled along down the street.
"I think most of these will be easier in the bar, or the club.." Sasori said, so they followed him to the (miraculously open and, for some weird reason, busy) dance club.
"Do we have to pay?" Konan asked nervously, looking at the doors as they crossed the street. Sasori laughed.
"No. Christmas Day and New Year's is free, unless you want a drink or something." They walked in. Music was pounding out of huge speakers, and a huge throng of people were dancing, even though it wasn't really dark outside or anything.
"I think this is the place for you to get the boxers, the kiss, and the condom, Konan, un." Deidara called above the loud music, and Konan rolled her eyes and disappeared into the throng.
"Think she'll be okay?" Pain asked after a minute. Sasori thought.
"Um...probably not. I really don't think that girl knows too much about modern society." he said casually, and Pain rolled his eyes and pushed through the crowd, following her.
Konan was concentrating, looking for somebody who might fall for number seven, the cheesy pick up line. She found a guy who looked twenty-ish. He smelled like he'd been drinking a little, but wasn't staggering or anything, so he should be fine. She walked up to him and tapped him on the shoulder. He looked around, then down at her in surprise. She forced herself to speak.
"Um...um...can I ask you something?" she asked, and he looked up, looking a little confused (maybe that's just the alchohol) but smiling.
"Sure." he said, and Konan almost gagged from the alcohol on his breath.
"Okay, um, could you do me a huge favor?" she asked, and he cocked his head to one side, leaning against the bar, still not letting go of her hand.
"Depends on the favor, sweetheart." he said, and she grimaced inwardly, hoping to never again be called sweetheart by somebody like him. Konan decided to simply be honest.
"I just need...I'm on a scavenger hunt. I need you to kiss me on the cheek, or give me your underwear, or a condom...or something..." she said, trailing off awkwardly. The man grinned again, swaying a little as he stood back up.
"Well sure, darlin'" he said, bending over and placing a hand on her chin. Konan flinched and squeezed her eyes shut, tensing, as the man's face drew nearer.
"On the cheek, on the cheek-" she said desperately. The man grinned, turning her face to kiss her mouth. But just before his awful mouth touched hers, he was pushed away, and Konan was grabbed around the waist. She looked up, relieved, and saw Pain, looking very angry. "On the cheek, asshole." he said, and the drunk man looked at him resentfully.
"Fine then. Only for the darlin' girl, mind. Wouldn't do a thing for..." the man's mutterings grew too low to hear. He kissed Konan briefly on the cheek and tossed her a condom out of his pocket. Konan then proceeded to put it in Pain's pocket, and to wipe her face desperately with the sleeve of her sweater as they pushed through the crowd.
"Well that was disgusting." Konan commented, taking Pain's hand and following him through the dancing people.
"You really are silly, you know, Konan. If you ask me, you're lucky I love you so much, or you'd probably not be here right now." he said drily, and Konan sighed, hugging him tightly as she walked. He wrapped a long arm around her, tugging affectionately on a lock of her blue hair.
"I know. I know, I know..." she sighed as they met up with Sasori and Deidara, who had succeeded in getting a pair of a guy's underwear.
Before they left, Sasori shouted "I LOVE SEX! SERIOUSLY, I MUST BE A NYMPHONIAC!", completing task number four, and earning them a lot of stares and embarassment. "Okay...who wants to do the cheesy pick-up line, un...?" Deidara asked as they left the club.
"Pain's turn." Konan said automatically with a grin. Pain sighed dramatically. They walked down the snowy street a bit until a boy around their age with spiky brown hair, a nose piercing, a purple V-neck and tight black jeans turned a corner and began walking towards them, his bright yellow sweater half-zipped up. Just before he passed, Pain spoke to him in a loud voice.
"I'll give you a nickel if you'll tickle my pickle." The guy took a double-take, then shook his head with a weirded-out expression, and hurried down the street.
Konan was speechless. The others were just as silent. Then Konan began to quiver violently with silent laughter, her mittened hands slapped over her mouth, tears streaming from her eyes as she laughed, bent-double.
"T-tickle your...your what!" Sasori asked, bursting into laughter. Deidara was holding him for support, bent-double as Konan was. Pain grinned awkwardly, shuffling a little uncomfortably. "I...well...it's the only one I could think of at the time..." he said as Konan and Deidara collapsed to their knees, Deidara banging his fist on the ground as he laughed, Konan in fits of hysterical giggles. Sasori had vaguely managed to regain his composure. He whipped out the list, shot Pain a sly, sideways glance, and said "Number Seven: complete."
Finally they began numbers one and nine. Sasori was going to go into another bar and do number nine (with Deidara supervising, of course) while Konan (with Pain's assistance) completed number one.
"Okay. So, the plan is, you sit down in the street, and look like you're in serious pain, clutching your ankle. I'll go for help, and say I've got a cast on my thigh, preventing me from carrying you myself. Got it?" Pain asked, and Konan nodded. He walked up the block a bit, then gave her a thumbs-up. She grinned, then, after making sure nobody was around, collapsed down in the snow, near a fire hydrant (their story would be that she had walked into it without seeing it). Not too long afterwards, Pain came back around the corner with a thirty-something year old man, who looked troubled. Konan immediately, grimaced, putting on an expression of extreme pain.
"Where do you need to get to, young lady? This man says that you're hurt.." the man said, bending low. Konan looked up at him tearfully.
"Oh...thank you...I should be fine if you could just get me to that...er...7eleven...I'll use their phone..." she said, looking injured and pained as she spoke.
"Oh...if it's a phone you need, I've got.." Drat.
"NO!" Konan shouted, and the man looked shocked. She quickly backtracked. "I mean...that's so kind of you...but really, I need to use that phone." she said, pointing at the 7eleven three blocks up.
The man considered for a moment before standing up and helping her to her feet, turning around, and telling her to jump. Konan did so, and almost fell off, before Pain pushed her butt further up on the man's back. She shot him a look, and he smirked, raising his eyebrows. She rolled her eyes, and continued her sounds of pain and whimpering. The man dropped her gently at the 7eleven, and she thanked him and hobbled in with Pain's help. As soon as he was out of sight, Pain began to laugh.
"What?" Konan asked suspiciously. He shook his head, still laughing.
"I swear...your expression...you looked like you were in labour instead of having a sprain." he said, and Konan blushed and crossed her arms, sulking.
They finally met up with Sasori, who had gotten ten bucks off a random girl. Deidara had even completed number 10 after joining in a gay/bi karaoke of Fuck you (lily allen). Konan had kissed Deidara's butt behind a convenience store, resulting in about 2 minutes' worth of awkward conversation. So all that was left were numbers 5, 6, and 8.
"Okay. So Konan and I will figure out number 6...can you guys do number 5?" Pain asked the others as they walked down the street again. It had begun to snow, and their breath fogged in front of them. "Sure. Consider it done, un." Deidara said, and Sasori slung an arm casually over the blonde's shoulders with a grin.
Twenty minutes later, Sasori and Deidara were going around and advertising the amateur production of Romeo and Juliet, taking place in the small town square. Konan was bright pink from nerves as she stood on the bench by the war memorial, and Pain was on one knee below her. Thank goodness she'd memorized Romeo and Juliet. She just hoped Pain could improvise enough to pull this off. Sasori and Deidara had a camera ready as soon as more than five people paused at once.
"Oh Romeo, Romeo, wherefort art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name! Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, And I'll no longer be a Capulet." She said, loud and clear, blushing like a tomato in august. Or whenever.
Pain seriously looked like he was cracking ribs from trying not to laugh as he raised his hand dramatically and tried to think up some Shakespearian junk that could vaguely pass. She had given him a basic outline of the rest of Romeo's lines. Hopefully he'd be fine..
"Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this?" he asked the 'audience', and Konan breathed a sigh of relief that he'd remembered this line. She half-stepped forwards dramatically before catching herself after almost falling off the snowy bench. Embarassing. Poor, ungraceful Juliet.
"'Tis but thy name that is my enemy; Thou art thyself, though not a Montegue. What's Monague? What's Montague? it is nor hand, nor foot,
Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part Belonging to a man. O, be some other name! What's in a name? that which we call a rose By any other name would smell as sweet; So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd, Retain that dear perfection which he owes Without that title. Romeo, doff thy name, And for that name which is no part of thee Take all myself."
Finally Deidara snapped a picture of about fifteen passer-bys who had paused to watch. Pain had somehow made it through his improv speeches, and they stopped before another character could interrupt.
"Thank you, thank you..." they said, before hurriedly rushing away from the scene. Konan hadn't stopped blushing fifteen minutes afterwards. Deidara had gotten a kiss on the cheek from a pretty woman who was selling cookies.
"Finished!" Konan exclaimed happily as they rushed back home. They burst in the door, but as soon as they did, the others rushed in the back door. It was a stupid, fluke-ish (yes, that is now officially a word, I say so.) tie.
Rats.
Christmas Day, 7:00 pm. Eight teenagers sprinted across the field. Seven of them wearing bras and panties, one of them in boxers, her arms wrapped tightly around her chest.
Merry Christmas, to one and all.
Okay, sooooo sorry about the delay on that one! But it's longer than the others, so I hope that makes up for it. Don't worry, there's still Christmas dinner and stuff, and New year's...and yeah, so there's plenty more stuff to come before they go back to school.
Review! PLEAAAASE REVIEWWW! :3!
Lots of love, Sailor-Nova :3