SATANSCHILD3683- LOL WE'RE GOING TO GET THERE. IT'S A LITTLE OF A SLOW BURN. BUT I ALREADY HAVE THE SETTING OF IT IN LINE. JUST HAVE TO CONNECT THE DOTS LEADING UP TO IT.
*POV BELLA*
Just like that, she's gone. I stare at the door, replaying last night. I never talked to anyone about my mom. But it's true when I told her, no one ever asked about her. It was hard at first but she's my imprint. I can't deny her anything. It didn't hurt as much as I thought it would. Talking to Alice is always easy, when not having to deal with Jasper and all that. As much as I enjoy our nights together, it sucks she doesn't speak to me at school. It's as if, we're having an affair. She spends her days with him and her nights with me. Sigh. I head upstairs to get my stuff and head over to Jess'. Alice didn't bring her up last night, which was surprising. When I pull up, Jess is outside with another batch of cookies. I smile as she gets in and hands me the bag.
Bella: you ARE trying to make me fat.
Jess: maybe that's my plan to keep you… I'm just joking Bella! As I told you, I like baking. Was up last night and couldn't sleep.
Bella: yeah? Everything ok?
Jess: yeahhhh. Just parents. Dad cheated and mom wants a divorce.
Bella: sorry you're dealing with that. Anything I can do?
Jess: I'll let you know if I think about something. Any luck with Alice?
Bella: she ignores me at school, in front of Jasper but will talk to me after. It feels like I'm the side piece you know?
Jess: that has got to suck. Maybe we should turn it up.
Bella: turn it up how?
Jess: I'll think of something.
We pull into the parking lot and I see the Eddie, Rosalie and Emmett. But no Alice or Jasper. I inhale deeply, not even a lingering scent. I head to class with Jess. There's no need for the flirting this morning. 1st and 2nd period are pretty chill. I don't see Alice in the hall and when I get to 3rd, Eddie is looking beyond serious. I give him a raised eyebrow and he just shakes his head no. I don't know what that means but I don't ask. When the bell rings, I see Jess standing by the door. She looks worried before she leans into me and says Alice asked if her and Jasper can join us for lunch. I look at Eddie and he just sighs before walking out. Jess grabs my hand and we head to lunch. I see Alice and Jasper sitting at the table, waiting on us. My heart skips a beat at seeing Alice but my wolf growls at smelling Jasper all over her. I pull out Jess' chair and I go get us some lunch. I walk by the Cullens table and see all 3 looking extremely pissed. Rosalie's eyes meet mine and she mouths sorry. When I come back to our table, Jess & Alice are in deep conversation about shopping. Jasper has his arm over Alice's chair and his other hand on her hand. I have to swallow the bile that wants to come out. I'm sure Jess is seeing the same thing I'm seeing. She turns to grab some of my food and I give her a raised eyebrow. She has a playful look in her eye. When she moves to put the spoon in my mouth, I gladly accept. I catch the game she's playing and start spoon feeding her too. Alice makes the comment that we are so cute. Though it annoys me, I chuckle at her comment. I turn around and feed myself. Alice breaks out laughing and when I turn to face her…
Alice: Bella I swear you don't know how to eat. You should stick to Jess feeding you. There's something on the side of your mouth.
Jess: it's ok, I got it babe.
Before I know it, Jess leans over and licks the bit of pudding that dripped on my chin. A shiver runs down my spine and my wolf growls. I force it down and give Jess a quick peck as a thank you. I continue eating while Jess & Alice discuss all the best stores in Port Angels. She leans her head on my shoulder as they "plan" to go shopping one day, making Jasper & I hold their bags. Occasionally, he looks over to me but doesn't say anything. I wonder why they're sitting with us and debate asking Alice. But I'm sure she'll tell me later. I just have to wait till tonight.
*POV ALICE*
The fight I thought we were going to have, turned into a huge blow up. Esme had to come out and referee.
Alice: Jasper, seriously. She's with Jess.
Jasper: she's with Jess yet always flirting with you. And then you sneak off to spend the night with her.
Alice: what flirting? Sneak off? I'm a grown ass adult. I can walk out that door anytime I want. Not that it's your business but all we do is talk. And I hang out with Charlie!
Jasper: I demand you stop going over there!
Alice: YOU DEMAND?! NO ONE DEMANDS ME. Check your damn tone with me.
Esme: Jasper that is enough. You do not demand ANYONE. What's wrong with you?
Jasper: did you know Alice spends the night with Bella every night?
Alice: I do not.
Esme: Jasper no relationship will survive without trust. You have to trust her. If she's telling you Bella is just a friend, Bella is just a friend.
Jasper doesn't say anything. I see all his muscles tense. His jaw tightly shut. He looks at Esme and then me.
Jasper: I don't trust her. I trust you but I don't trust her. Not only is she a wolf and dangerous. She likes you and doesn't know how to respect me. If you say there's nothing there, prove it.
Alice: prove it? Are you fucking kidding me Jasper?
Esme: Alice… while I don't think he should be asking you this. It wouldn't hurt to possibly make him feel more secure in your relationship.
Alice: that's the thing mom, he didn't ask. But whatever. I need to go get ready.
I leave them to have at it. I don't care anymore and just want to shower all the shit off. I'm beyond pissed. Last night was a great night. Bella talking to me about her mom, made me feel special. A part of her life she's never shared with others. The water relaxes me and sense comes flowing back. He does deserves for me to make him feel secure. He deserves for me to really try with him. I quickly get dressed and head downstairs. I grab his hand and lead us to my car. I try to push all the love and care I have for him.
Alice: maybe you'll feel more secure if you get to know her. Let's have lunch with her and Jess today. I'll let Jess know.
He doesn't say anything but gives my hand a squeeze. Probably still not trusting his tone. We get to school 30 seconds before the bell. Luckily for us no one is around so we don't have to walk at human speed. He rushes over to open my door for me, pulling me into a hug and I give him a quick peck in return. We stand there for a minute just holding each other and enjoying the moment. When I look up at him, I see the love and worry he's feeling. When he lends down to kiss me, I don't turn away. I feel love surround us and it feels like everything will be ok. We both rush off to our classes, making it right on time. I replay the fight from this morning, wondering if there's anything I could've done differently. I forget to block my thoughts and before I can even sit down, Edward gives me a cold stare.
Alice: Edward please don't start….
Edward: you deserve better. But don't worry I won't, I have to focus on the lesson anyways.
I know he doesn't have to. We've repeated high school so many times that nothing is new to us. But he doesn't say anything else to me. I spend the whole class thinking about everything, breaking down everything that happen and all my explanations for it. I know he's listening when I see his face soften. Right before the bell rings, he turns to me.
Edward: he's completely out of line Alice and you know it. As much as you might not want to admit it, you know Bella likes you. And Bella deserves better than you throwing your 'relationship' in front of her to prove a point to him.
He turns and is out the door before I can reply. Edward has always known the truth about mine and Jasper's relationship. He's my brother and my best friend. I expected to see Jasper at the door but he doesn't show up. I take my time walking to my next class when I get a vision of Edward telling Rose and her being just as upset. I don't expect no different. She likes Bella. They all do. I had been saying I'm scare others might hurt Bella. Yet here I am. I brace myself for what she might say. I get visions of her going back and forth on what to say, to the point it starts giving me a headache. Which I'm sure she knows would happen and possibly does it for just that purpose. Finally, she decides not to say anything. The silent treatment from both of them, hurts more than the fight with Jasper. They just don't understand that this has to be done. When I see Jess, I ask if Jasper & I can sit with her & Bella. Explaining that since Bella is my friend, I would like to get to know her too. She hesitantly agrees but doesn't say anything else. Jasper meets me to walk with me to lunch. I know he feels the sadness. Possibly thinking it's because of our fight, he stops us in the hall. Looking into my eyes, he hugs me. He sends me waves of love and regret. His way of apologizing. I pull away and give him a quick kiss as to say thank you, before pulling him to lunch. Which ends up feeling like it went on forever. I'm beyond happy that Jasper couldn't feel me because I felt like I was going through all the emotions. When Jess licks Bella's face, I feel nauseous. But I don't say anything. Finally, the bell rings. Jasper grabs my hand, gives it a kiss and pulls me to his side. He slowly walks me to class, as if enjoying the moment and hugs me before walking away. I sense the happiness shining from him. And I can't help but be happy the storm has passed. I know I won't be able to go see Bella tonight. And probably shouldn't spend the night anytime soon. But at least I can hang out with her whenever Rose works on her car. I enter study hall and already can feel the tension. Judging by the looks on both Bella's and Edward's face, I just stay silent. When I finally do look at Bella, she looks... I honestly don't know exactly the feeling she's giving off. I would love to have Jasper's gift right now. Wait, he can't feel her. I want to reach out and grab her hand but know I shouldn't. And then I hear her music. I don't know the song but listening to the lyrics I can't help fall deep in thought.
Even though it set me free.
And my tears flow like the ocean.
As they floated in the breeze.
They were falling in slow motion.
And they brought me to my knees.
Oh, you're haunting me, taunting me all in my brain.
Turn off the light and now all that remains.
Fills me with doubt.
And I'm shouting your name out loud.
Why do you wanna put me through the pain?
I get the feeling I'll never escape.
Edward's face is a mirror of mine. And it feels like forever since I've seen her smile. I desperately want to say something. Just something to make her smile. Anything. But my mind is drawing a blank.
Alice: thinking of an ex?
Bella: sure.
Alice: you shouldn't dwell on the past.
Bella: so I've been told.
Once again, those words. When the bell rings she's gone before anyone else can get up. I'm surprise Jasper isn't waiting at the door. So, I dash off to meet Jasper at our lockers. I wonder if he's keeping his distance in a way to show he's trusting me. I grab his hand and we head to the parking lot. I spot Jess and Bella at her car talking to Angela and Eric. Bella doesn't even look my way. Once again, she's holding Jess. Grinning ear to ear. The drive home is quick but smooth. I ask Jasper if he wants to watch a movie with me and he agrees. We end up watching movies till the early morning. I excuse myself to go shower and replay the day. Yesterday evening was a first in the Cullen household. Edward spent the whole evening in his room. Rose and Emmett decided to do a last minute day trip to Seattle. I saw Rose make the decision on her way home. They would be staying there till school tomorrow. Rose told Emmett the second she had a chance. Of course, with him liking Bella, sided with Rose and Edward. And I'm sure Esme already told Carlisle while we were at school. I sent Bella a text last night saying sorry, and I'll explain everything soon. But she never replied to me. I hear a knock on my door and realize, I've been in the shower for 2 hours now. I quickly hop out and get dressed. Great another day of school.