Chapter Fifteen: Winter
Early morning hours of the night Chisa met Kurogasa:
"A pity."
Chisa didn't sleep at all that night, but neither did Kurogasa. He stayed by their front door, sword nearby, and waited in case the assassin had been followed. Once in a while she would hear a cigarette being lit in the next room, but overall everything was silent. She was haunted by what she had seen, but she knew that after his "pity" comment that she had to stand up for herself to some degree. She gathered her courage and walked into the next room.
Kurogasa was still seated where he had been when she went back to bed. He looked genuinely surprised that she came out to speak to him.
"Please don't come home like this again. I don't know what you need to do to recover and simply be the person I've lived with the past few months, but I didn't come all this way to live in fear of you. It's a pity that I have to feel this way about a person I care about." Her eyes were full of fire, a rarity for the generally docile Chisa.
Kurogasa laughed lightly. "Now that is the face of a woman that could be a hitokiri's wife."
"I am serious. I don't want you home like this." She glared at him.
He stood to face her and she looked up at him, scared, but pretending that she wasn't. He patted her on the shoulder. "Understood, but if anyone tries to invade our home again, you can expect this."
"Understood." Chisa turned to go back to bed, but he grabbed her wrist.
"I like you like this." He smirked at her.
She jerked her wrist back and without a word returned to bed, where she proceeded to avoid sleep.
Back in present day Tokyo:
While Chisa was finishing her meal, she kept hearing Kurogasa's words echo in her head. By the look on her face, it was clear to the others that perhaps she had overdone it for the day and it was definitely time for her to have some time to herself or to decompress with Akari.
"Thank you all again. This has been incredibly meaningful to me, but I am ready for some rest." She said; her eyes looked heavy.
The others wished her goodbye and she began a slow walk back to the inn.
On her way, she came upon a shrine on the side of the street. It wasn't especially beautiful or elaborate, but she decided that she would stop by to say a prayer for Jin-e's soul. As she approached, she saw him come from behind a fence, dressed in his full Shinsengumi garb.
"Been a long time…"
Chisa chose to not speak to this vision, or spirit, or hallucination. Whatever it was, it was simply the product of stress and exhaustion. She walked by it without acknowledging it; its eyes did not follow her. It vanished. She said her prayer and continued on her way.
As she was walking, she began thinking about the years that he was in the Shinsengumi; that was the next place she would be starting her stories in the morning with her gracious hosts. She never saw him much during that time and he chose to not speak about them much, so she wasn't sure how far those tales could even go. One thing was for certain, those years took a boy who had a penchant for fighting and a knack for swordsmanship and turned him into someone who enjoyed killing for sport.
She had other stories on her mind as she walked as well, excited to get back to the room and rest. Her memories in Shiga were complicated. When things were going well and Jin-e was home, she was typically content and occasionally happy. When Jin-e was gone or Kurogasa came home, things were different. She thought about a time when things weren't so bad.
One year after Jin-e's departure from the Shinsengumi, fourteen years prior to present day:
It was an extremely cold winter, marked with frequent and deep snowfalls. Jin-e had chosen to take on very few contracts, if only because he had concerns about the snow making him easier to track. Chisa had begun to settle into her lifestyle in relative isolation. Akari had moved with her child, a sixteen year old boy named Daisuke, to Shiga as well, about an hour from Chisa and Jin-e. She was now a widow, with her husband having been killed in the war.
Aside from occasional ventures into nearby Otsu for supplies or groceries, Chisa and Jin-e were at home together. They would play cards, read, cook, or just talk about times when they were kids. Jin-e of course could train in the cellar, which he did for several hours a day. Chisa knew Jin-e was bored, but she had sacrificed enough for him and he could make a small sacrifice for her.
Before Jin-e's most recent contract, Chisa had come down sick but he chose to continue anyway. Akari stopped by to care for Chisa and, as anticipated, by the time Jin-e returned he had a fever. He did his best to pretend he was feeling fine, but ultimately gave up once Akari went home. Both spent three days stuck in bed, miserable and coughing, hoping that whatever they had would pass relatively quickly. By day four, Jin-e was well enough to continue with his chores but Chisa was still bedfast; since childhood she had always been predisposed to illness.
"Wake up…" Jin-e lightly shook her. "If you don't start improving, we're going to the doctor in town."
"Leave me alone…" She groaned, hiccuped, and pulled her blanket over her head.
Jin-e was careful about them going into town together, not wanting to risk exposure. This was beginning to become an emergency situation, however. Chisa's color had not improved, she wasn't able to keep food down, and she was still keeping a fever. He helped her dress warmly and they rushed to the doctor by horseback.
When they arrived at the hospital, it seemed that the harsh winter was taking its toll on many. It was standing room only in the waiting area, which frustrated Jin-e for Chisa. She was breathing heavily and noticeably uncomfortable, leaning hard against him to stay upright. He hadn't ever seen her this sick, but having just recovered from the same illness he knew it wasn't anything to scoff at.
After over an hour, the doctor called Chisa for her examination. Jin-e was able to chat with the doctor briefly before the exam and gave him some context about what the illness was like when he had it, but was asked to step outside during the exam itself after the doctor discovered they were unmarried. Jin-e didn't like this at all.
After about fifteen minutes, the doctor opened the door to the exam room and asked him to step inside. He was organizing some medications to send home with them. Chisa was seated in a chair by an exam table with a hot rag on her forehead. She seemed barely aware that either man was in the room.
The doctor handed the packet of medications to Jin-e. "She has some compound issues, both of which are caused by cold winters like this. She's the fifth case I've seen just today that has both."
"Both what? Will she recover?" Jin-e looked at Chisa, concerned.
"Her chest congestion should clear up soon with no issue. But…"
"But what?" Jin-e was growing angry.
Chisa looked up at him with wide, wet eyes.
"Well, I believe this girl is pregnant."
Present day Tokyo:
Chisa remembered that day well and while it was terrifying, it was one more memory she could hold onto to get through what she anticipated to be long, difficult nights moving forward.
Finally, she got back to the inn, beyond ready for sleep. She slid the door open to her room.
"Mama!"
