Victoria knew that she had to find Ryan sooner rather than later. The only issue was that she had no idea where he could've gone. A part of her hoped that he wouldn't have gone far, but she wasn't entirely sure. She'd found herself travelling back to Manhattan in the back of a cab, Evie next to her as she tried to balance her daughter, calling Ryan and getting to Neuman at the warehouse. Eventually, Ryan finally picked up and he told her where he was. He was in Central Park by the lake where they fed the ducks. Victoria told the cab driver that she needed a diversion and she went after Ryan, texting Alex and promising him that she'd be there soon.
Coming to the park, Victoria picked Evie up, sensing that her daughter was exhausted. Victoria bounced her against her hip and spoke to her in a hushed tone as she walked along the path and saw Ryan sat on the bench they usually sat on when they came to the park. Victoria slowed her walk down, a moment of apprehension taking hold of her as she was unsure of what she should say to him.
But then she remembered why they were in this mess. They were here because of so many lies and perhaps the time for lying was over? Perhaps they couldn't keep lying and, eventually, they just had to tell the truth. She knew it would hurt Ryan. She knew that he would be in pain knowing that his father wasn't the man he thought he was, but Grace had already outed that information.
Victoria sat down on the bench next to him, Evie in her lap.
"Ryan, where you go?" Evelyn asked from the boy, looking at him inquisitively.
"I just wanted to see the ducks," Ryan said to her and Victoria had always admired that about him. He had always been kind to Evie. He had always treated her like his own little sister and she loved that about him. "I needed time to think."
"I know, sweetheart," Victoria said to him. "I know what happened was a big shock, okay? And what happened to Grace was an accident. I know that and you know that."
Ryan laced his hands together on his lap and bowed his head. "I just want the truth," he said to Victoria.
"And I will give it to you, but not here, okay?" Victoria said to him. "Me and you…we can go and we can have a milkshake and I'll tell you the truth. Whatever you want to know, you can ask me because lying to each other…we can't do that. We're family. We need to tell each other the truth and I want to do that, but let me just go to Annie and Hughie…ask them to look after Evie for an hour so we can talk."
"Starlight?" Ryan checked with her. "You're working with Starlight?"
"She's not the enemy, Ryan," Victoria promised the boy. "No matter what your father might have said about her, she's not the enemy. She's been my friend for years and she's good. I know that I'm asking a lot…you to trust me…but please, just trust me and if after I tell you everything then you want nothing to do with me then we'll figure things out."
Victoria waited patiently for his response. She could see him mulling it over before finally he nodded his head and she knew that she had limited time to clear this mess up.
…
"You managed to persuade Neuman to help us," Hughie said as soon as Victoria walked into the warehouse with the two kids. She moved down the steps, Ryan a step behind her and Evelyn also walking with her hand inside of her mum's. Coming to the bottom step, Hughie, Annie and Alex bombarded her instantly. "How?"
"I don't think I persuaded her, I think she was wavering anyway," Victoria said to them. "Where is she?"
"She's on her way and Hughie is just off to get Zoe," Annie replied. "And how is my favourite little girl?" she cooed, bending down and looking to Evelyn, tickling her sides and making her laugh before she wrapped her bandaged hands around her waist.
"Auntie Annie…tickles…" she laughed and Alex smiled down at the sight of her, his heart swelling with affection for the little girl.
"Listen, I need you to look after Evie for an hour, okay? I Just need to talk to Ryan and then I'll come back and explain everything," Victoria promised them, knowing that she had limited time an Ryan was stood awkwardly behind her, waiting for her to come with him as he tried to drink in what was going on in the lab. Victoria hardly wanted him to know that they were making a virus to kill Neuman, but she hoped that maybe they didn't need to use that if Neuman was on their side.
"You sure that's a good idea? We need to get you and Neuman together as soon as possible," Hughie said to her.
"I'll be back, I promise," Victoria said to him.
"We'll look after her," Annie said firmly and Alex bent down to pick Evelyn up as she clung to him. "Just hurry, okay?"
"I will," Victoria assured her.
"You okay?" Alex tacked on for her and she nodded her head at him as he looked at her with concern.
"Will be," she assured him.
She turned quickly and nodded to Ryan. The two of them left the warehouse and walked a couple of blocks before finding a diner. Slipping into a booth in the corner, Victoria picked at the torn red leather of the seat underneath her thighs. She ordered two strawberry milkshakes for them and looked across to Ryan, waiting for him to speak first as she was unsure if she should. The diner was quiet enough that no one would bother them. It wasn't exactly in the middle of the city and it didn't entirely have a welcoming interior, but it would have to do for the time being. She knew she had to get this done because it was the only way she might be able to keep Ryan on her side.
"I don't know where to start," Ryan confessed to her.
"I know," Victoria assured him as the waitress set down two milkshakes in front of them. Ryan took hold of the glass with one hand and held the straw with the other. "I know that it's a lot to take in and I never wanted you to find out. I kept things from you to protect you because I wanted you to have a normal childhood. I wanted you to grow up with a stable family and just know…know what it's like to have people who love you because I never had that as a kid, not really, and I wanted you to have what I never had."
"And I know that," Ryan said to her. "I know that you love me, but did you want me to go with them? Is that why you wanted me there?"
"Honestly?" Victoria asked from him. "I knew that Billy thought that you could kill Homelander, but I never wanted that for you. I told him that I'd never agree with it because I don't. I never wanted that to be an option and Billy promised me that it wouldn't be. He promised me that he wouldn't ask you, but he lied to me and I cannot begin to tell you how mad that makes me, Ryan. I hate that he did that."
"And what they were saying about him…what he did…"
"And this is the part that I never wanted you to know because I just wanted to keep you safe," Victoria said. "Do you remember when I first met you? When we came to see you and your mom and we just sat in the garden and we built those Lego sets?"
Ryan nodded his head once.
"I saw how much you were loved," Victoria said. "I saw you with your mom and I knew what you two had was special. She loved you. She adored you so much and…and I just don't want you to think of anything else but that, okay? I just want you to know that she loved you more than anything."
Ryan glanced down and he swallowed hard as Victoria watched him try to take in what he'd been told. "But my dad raped her."
Victoria felt her heart break for the boy in front of her. She didn't know how to handle this. She didn't know how to tell him that was what had happened. She just nodded her head once and she saw Ryan begin to cry, his eyes turning glassy and his head bowed. Victoria moved from her side of the booth and went to sit down next to him, arm wrapping around his shoulders and holding onto him tightly as he leant against her and cried.
"I'm sorry," Victoria said to him. "I'm so sorry you have to find out this way."
"Why? Why would he do that?" Ryan asked.
"Because your dad…he's not who we think he is and I know that's hard to hear. It's difficult to take in, but it is true," Victoria said and she stroked his upper arm as she continued to peer down at him. "And I never wanted you to find out, but that's why I did this…why I was always annoyed when he tried to force you into being a supe…because I didn't want him to make you think like he did."
"But why are you with him?" Ryan asked from Victoria. "Why are you with him if he's so horrible?"
"It's not an easy thing to explain," Victoria confessed to him. "When I first met your dad, he was different and I never knew what he was like or what he had done. He was kind to me…he made me laugh and we…he knew me like no one else ever had done and I knew him too. I thought that what we had was love. I thought that it was real and it…it was real," she decided on saying because that much was true. It had been real. The way she'd cried over him and felt her heart break told her that it really had been love. "But then I found things out that changed everything. I found out what he'd done to your mum and I tried to leave, but he wouldn't let me."
"Did he…has he ever hurt you like that…like he did my mom?" Ryan questioned, struggling to ask it and feeling his face contort, unable to pick his gaze up and look her in the eye. Victoria blinked back her tears and made herself shake her head. She would tell him the truth, but he didn't need to know everything. He didn't need to know how on Homelander's telecast birthday, her husband had forced her to her knees by emotionally blackmailing her. He didn't need to know how Homelander had wiped her memories and slept with her. None of that was necessary for him to know.
"No," Victoria told him.
"Your heart is beating faster," Ryan replied, voice slightly husky and mouth dry.
"Ryan, your dad…what we've done…what he's done…it's not like what he did to your mom, okay?" Victoria said to him. "Just believe me, sweetie, it's not the same."
"But he has hurt you?"
"He knows that he doesn't have to hurt me to get me to stay with him," Victoria said. "After I found out what he'd done to your mom, he had a supe wipe my memories. It was then when I met you. When I met you I had no idea what he'd done and that was when I agreed to marry him because I thought that he was the man I'd first met."
"He did that to you?"
"But Billy and Annie found a supe who gave me my memories back," Victoria said, "but by that stage…I was pregnant."
"You came back," Ryan said to her. "That day in the woods, you came back and you let me go with Billy."
"Because I thought that was safer than going back with your dad," Victoria said and she looked to the milkshakes, noting how the cream on top of them had basically sunk down and melted with the drink. "I didn't want you to go with him. I wanted to keep you from him and keep you safe and so I went back with him. I was pregnant and I was scared. He promised me that I'd be safe with him and we had Evie…but it was then when I found out about Flight 37."
"He really left a plane full of people to die?" Ryan checked with her. "Why would he do that?"
"I…I think things went wrong on the hijacking…the plane was going down and he couldn't do anything to stop it. He said that he wouldn't be able to save everyone on board because he couldn't keep the plane in the air…but he never tried and I think that's the part that hurts the most," Victoria said. "He never tried to save them and he…he felt no remorse over it."
Victoria took a second to remember when she'd found out about Flight 37. It had been the night of some Vought gala and they'd argued. Then again, when hadn't they argued? They were constantly at each other's throats.
"I just…how can I go home…how can we go home?"
"And this is what I need to talk to you about," Victoria said. "I know that this has all come as a shock to you, but I can't go back home. Your dad…what we have…we can't be together. I can't go back to him. I don't agree with what he's done. I don't agree with what he wants to do and so I need to stand up to him. I need to stand up to him and make it stop, Ryan. I don't know if I'm going to be able to, but I have to try."
"What are you going to do?"
"I'm going to speak out against him," Victoria said and for the first time since she'd thought about it, it felt real. It all felt so much more real. "I should've spoke out against him a long time ago, but I've been scared, Ryan, and I know that is difficult for you to hear, but I've been scared of what he might do not to me, but to the people I love and the people who I'm friends with…but I can't be scared anymore. I can't be scared of him and I know he's your dad. I know you love him and care for him despite everything because love is complicated and I know that. Trust me, I know that."
"I just can't kill him. I don't think I can do that and you know what they did to him. He told me how they kept him locked up and I can't let that happen to me."
"And it's not going to happen to you," Victoria promised him on that point. "I am never going to let them use you like that. But I can't sit by silently anymore. I can't do that."
"You…I don't know what to do," Ryan confessed to Victoria. "I don't know how to feel about any of this because I…I just don't know, Vicky."
"And that's okay, sweetie," Victoria promised him on that point. "It's okay not to know how to feel and I know it's going to take time for you to process all of this, but I want you to know that I want you to stay with me, okay? Whatever happens, I will look after you and I will keep you safe."
"But I have to go against my dad," Ryan concluded.
"I…I don't know what will happen, Ryan," Victoria admitted to him. She didn't want to tell him that he might have to go against his father. She wasn't sure how he would react to that. "I just know that I am going to be here for you, okay?" she assured him because she knew that she couldn't pressurise him into coming with her. She had to tread carefully and gently. "And I will always love you."
"I need time," Ryan said to her and Victoria tried not to cry as she felt him slipping through her fingers. But she couldn't force him to stay with her. "I'll come back, but I need time to understand and think."
Victoria just nodded her head once at hearing him. She exhaled a deep breath and kissed the top of his head as she finally wrapped both her arms around him and held him tightly. He wrapped his own arms around her and she knew that she had to give him space, no matter the consequences. The alternative wasn't worth thinking about.
…
Going back to the warehouse, Victoria stepped inside and saw Alex stood on the balcony, arms folded and leaning over the ledge. He stood up straight when he saw her and she moved towards him silently. He didn't need to be told anything to know that she was overwhelmed. He moved his arms around her waist as she rested her forehead against his chest and her hands sat on his shoulders.
"He left?" Alex checked.
"I watched him fly off, but he said he just needed time to process what happened. I couldn't force him to stay with me, not after what Billy did," Victoria said to Alex and she shook her head at him. "Him and Grace told Ryan everything," she said and looked up to Alex, her hands stroking his broad shoulders. "They told him about Homelander and what he did to Becca…the assassination attempt and Flight 37. They told him how he was the only one who could kill Homelander and he freaked out. He killed Grace by pushing her against the wall and he ran away. I argued with Billy and I don't think there's any coming back for us. We said things that were horrible and I…I think we're done…"
"You don't need to say that," Alex said to her and he moved a hand to cup her cheek, stroking along her cheekbone. "You've fought before."
"Not like this," Victoria said to him. "He's too far gone and he'll never forgive me for being with Homelander in the first place. The resentment he has towards me…he can bury it, but it'll always be there and a part of me gets it. I fell in love with the man who ruined his life."
"But you never knew."
"Maybe not, but I've still…Alex…I've still done things…I've said things to him," Victoria babbled, not entirely certain on what she wanted to tell Alex. "Since being back with him, it's been difficult. The way I feel about him has been difficult," she confessed and Alex's brows knitted together. He needed the truth from her and it seemed that today she was all about truth. "When it's just been us, it's felt easy. It felt like old times and not a minute went by when I didn't hate myself for feeling like that because I know he is and what he's done. I hate that I love him."
Alex stood up straight then, his grip on her tightening as his jaw ticked. "You said love," he clocked on. "You still love him," he said and it wasn't a question. He knew that she did, no matter how she protested against it.
"I think a part of me will always love the man I thought he was," Victoria confessed to Alex. "And there are times when I catch glimpses of that man because he was my first…and when that happens then I feel myself slipping back into wanting him and I'm telling you this because you deserve the truth. You deserve to know that I'm fucked up. What we have is fucked up and it's not healthy and I know that. We both know that. But it is over. It's over and we're done."
"You mean that?" Alex checked with her.
"Yes," Victoria said, "because it has to be. I can't go back to him and pretend that all of this is alright. And, to be honest, Alex, I don't want to do that either. I don't want to keep hiding and running. I want to stand up and take him on."
"You know you don't have to do it alone, don't you?" Alex checked with her. "I know that things have been complicated and I know that you…if you still love him…still have feelings for him then I do get that. I understand, but I can't be a part of that."
"And if I tell you that I don't know?" Victoria wondered back. "If I tell you that a part of me longs for what we once had then that's the truth, but what's also true is that I long for what me and you had in England too. I long for those walks along the beach with Evelyn... the early nights in front of the fire. I miss those days too."
"But do you long for them with him or me?" Alex questioned her and that was the part that she didn't know how to answer.
And she didn't get a chance to reply as the door to the warehouse opened and in walked Victoria Neuman with Zoe and a couple of men from her security detail. Victoria looked to her as she moved along the balcony, still wearing her pink pastel suit and holding her daughter's hand.
"Are we doing this?" Neuman asked.
"We're doing this," Victoria assured her. "Come on, we need to get going."
Neuman walked by her and moved down the stairs to where Hughie was stood opposite Frenchie and M.M. Annie was still sat in the corner with Evelyn, keeping her entertained. Victoria turned to follow the security detail down the stairs, but Alex took hold of her wrist and stopped her from leaving. He whispered down to her, voice low and full of desperation which Victoria understood because she was desperate for him too.
"I still love you," he said to her, "and I still want you. I just don't want to compete with the memory of him."
He let her go and walked by her. Victoria wanted to take hold of him and tell him that wasn't what was happening. She wanted to tell him that she did care about him. She wanted to tell him that she loved him and cared for him just as much as he cared for her. But she didn't. She let him go and she followed him down the steps and to the warehouse space.
"Okay," Hughie said, getting the conversation started.
Victoria moved over to Annie and crouched down, smiling to her daughter and cooing over her in a soft voice as Hughie confirmed with Neuman what the plan was. Victoria stood up after a few minutes as Annie picked Evelyn up like she weighed nothing, cradling her in her arms.
"So, the two of you are going to help us stop Vought and Homelander," Hughie declared.
Neuman nodded her head once and Victoria swore she looked like she was on the verge of tears. Victoria kissed the top of her daughter's head and went over to stand by Neuman's side as Alex remained in the background behind Frenchie and M.M., arms folded over his cable-knit green sweater and eyes cast downwards.
"We need to act quickly before Homelander decides to go after Singer himself," Victoria said.
"And the kids go somewhere safe," Neuman tacked on.
"Yeah," Hughie concurred with that. But before they could do anything else, a voice entered the conversation.
"Oi," it said and Victoria glanced over Hughie's shoulder to see Butcher stood there.
"Butcher?" Hughie asked, turning around and looking at him.
"No deals," Billy said and Victoria shook her head. How was he even here and standing. She moved towards her brother, sensing that something was wrong. She couldn't put her finger on it, but there was something amiss and she had a feeling that this meeting wasn't going to go the way she had planned.
"How are you even standing?" she demanded to know from Billy and he looked at her, but it was with something in his eye that she had never seen before. He looked at her with venom and hatred. "You were sick, Billy. You were in that hospital bed and you could hardly stand."
Still, he said nothing to her, just kept looking at her with a menacing expression on his face.
"Look, Butcher, I can explain and I know what this looks like, but after everything we've been through together I have not once asked you to trust me, but right now I am asking you to trust me," Hughie said to his friend. "I need you to trust me now…the way you used to trust, Lenny…the way you trust your sister."
Billy was quiet and Victoria wondered if Hughie had gotten through to him, especially when he placed his hand on his shoulder. But then he squeezed his shoulder and moved him to one side. Victoria stepped up then, standing in front of her brother and moving her hands to his shoulders.
"I know you can't stand me right now," she said to him. "I know you think that I'm your enemy, but I'm not. We want the same thing. We want to stop Homelander and we can…but it doesn't need to be at the expense of other people. Billy, just think about it."
"It's all I thought about," Billy replied and he pushed her out of the way without using much force. Victoria almost fell to the ground, but M.M. caught her, helping her straighten herself out as something seemed to explode from Billy's chest. There were yells of fear that echoed throughout the warehouse as tentacles came from him, darting in different directions and stopping anyone from moving.
Gunshots from the secret service men rang out through the warehouse as Victoria rushed to her daughter, taking hold of her from Annie as the supe moved towards Billy. Victoria clung to her daughter, shielding her from the violence. Alex was behind her in a second, arms going around the pair of them and holding them against him tightly in a feeble attempt to stop them from getting hurt by Billy.
But then a tentacle wrapped around Victoria Neuman, obscuring her eyes and lifting her into the air.
"No!" Victoria yelled at her brother and she urged Alex to hold onto Evelyn as she moved to her brother, weaving in and out of the tentacles. "Billy, if you do this then you'll ruin everything! Don't! Please! For me…don't do this!"
But he wasn't even looking at her as she tried to shove against his arm. He just kept his gaze set on Neuman as she tried to escape the grip of the cord around her. She thrashed around, but she couldn't get away. She screamed against it and Zoe tried to lash out and stop Billy, but one of the tentacles knocked her to the floor instantly. She went crashing to the ground, skidding across the floor and hitting a cabinet, knocking it over with the force she hit it with.
"Billy!" Victoria screamed his name, but it was too late and her tugging on his arm did nothing.
He tore Victoria Neuman in half, the noise crunching and deafening. He dropped her body to the ground, blood splattering everywhere and drenching Hughie completely. Victoria stumbled back, hands covering her mouth as she tried not to be sick at the sight of the woman, her corpse discarded on the ground. Her brother had ruined it. He had ruined their chance of getting out of this mess. He had clearly done something to make himself become this man.
"No!" Hughie shouted as Annie and Kimiko began moving towards Billy, but the tentacles hissed in their faces and they didn't move any further. Hughie looked back to Butcher as Alex came over to Victoria with Evelyn, taking hold of her waist once more and walking her backwards from her brother.
"Let him go," Hughie said in defeat. There was no chance that this was going to work. They couldn't fight Butcher and they all knew it.
Billy just continued smirking as he stepped towards Frenchie who had a gun raised with the dart that contained the virus. Frenchie pressed the tip of the gun against Butcher's chest. "This will kill you," he warned him.
"You took V?" M.M. asked but Victoria wasn't sure that was what had happened. She thought that it was more likely that the V inside of him had taken over. He'd told her before that he felt like he had someone talking over his shoulder and urging him to do things he didn't want to do. It turned out that he probably did want to do them though.
"You're not going to kill me, Frenchie," Billy said confidently. "So, I'll be taking that."
And he forced Frenchie to lower the gun as the other man kept on glaring at Billy, the anger etched onto his face as rage consumed him. But he couldn't shoot Butcher. He couldn't do that and so he let him take the gun from him that contained the virus.
"Billy," Victoria tried one final time as her brother moved to the steps of the warehouse to leave. He paused for a moment, but he didn't look back to her. "Please, don't do this. You don't need to do this. We can figure a way out of this. I promise you we can…please…for me."
"For you?" Billy echoed and he looked to her then, turning around to face her. "You made your choice, Victoria. You chose him, just like you always will. Does he know?" he jutted his chin towards Alex and looked at him for a moment as he spoke. "Does he know that you still love Homelander? That you've been letting him fuck you for the last several months?"
"Billy, enough," Victoria snapped. "You've always resented me for loving him, despite the fact I never knew what he did. You've never been able to let go of that."
"Maybe I haven't," Billy confirmed for her on that point and he took a few steps towards her, each measured and purposeful as Victoria met him halfway, chin jutting out and glare set on him. She wasn't going to back down. She refused to back down or be scared of him.
"Then take that out on me," she said, pointing to herself. "But you don't need to risk thousands of innocent lives for this vendetta you have against one man."
"That's where you're wrong," Billy replied. "It's not just one man. All supes are dangerous. But it is him you're so concerned with. Like I said, you go back to being his cheap, little whore while you still can…while he's still standing."
"You're never going to get away with this," Victoria said to her brother. "Either he'll stop you or I will, but I'm not letting you do this."
Billy chuckled. "Looks to me like you don't have much of a choice," he said. "If I were you, I'd get away from here…that goes for all of you," he said and addressed the rest of the room. But then he turned back around and smirked. "And you're all welcome."
…
Victoria steeled herself as she walked back into the penthouse, prepared for whatever barrage of insults were awaiting her. She had to admit that she was exhausted. She'd been awake for almost two days and she was ready to sleep, but not before she did this. The penthouse was still in ruins, but obviously Homelander had been busy with other endeavours for the day. He was sat on the floor, back against the front of the sofa and Ryan's backpack by his side with Evie's giraffe in his lap. He'd taken his gloves off and was staring down at his wedding ring when he heard her footsteps.
"What do you want?" he questioned.
"I've come to pack some stuff for me and Evie," Victoria said to her husband. A part of her had hoped she might return and find Ryan there, but he was nowhere to be seen.
"Where is she?"
"In a hotel with Natalie," Victoria said and that was true. She had phoned their babysitter and begged her to come to her. Thankfully, Natalie hadn't been at work that day and so she hadn't seen the mess that Homelander had created. "I wasn't going to bring her back here. How do I explain to her that her daddy destroyed all of her things?"
Victoria moved further into the room and noticed that the TV was on, announcing the death of Victoria Neuman. Of course, it would've leaked by now. Closing her eyes for a second, Victoria could still see her body on the floor, arms in the air and eyes lifeless, rolled back to show the whites of them as she tried to fight for her life.
"I take it you've seen?" Homelander questioned from his wife.
"Yeah," Victoria said and for some reason she sat down on the edge of the destroyed sofa, just a few inches from where he sat on the floor, shrugging out of her coat and setting her bag down. "So…what does that mean?" she questioned from her husband as she noted that he'd been crying. No doubt he'd been upset over how he'd ruined everything.
"Well, it means that Singer stays as President," Homelander said to her as if it were simple. "What can I do about it now? Neuman is dead. She was the one who was going to be my puppet, but she's gone…of course they killed her…Singer found out and he probably sent some assassin."
"It was Billy," Victoria said to her husband and his wide eyes peered up to her. She shook her head and tucked her hair behind her ear. "I don't know what he's done, but he managed to kill her…and he took the virus."
"The virus?"
"You know, the supe-killing virus," Victoria said. "I don't know where he went, but I know that he isn't the brother who I thought he was. We said things that we can't take back and he's…he's lost and I couldn't get him to come back."
"I'll find him."
"I wouldn't sound so confident," Victoria warned her husband. "But, either way, I need to go. I can't stay here."
"And where are you going to go?" Homelander wondered. "You can't live in a hotel for the rest of your life, can you? And then there is the matter of custody that we're going to have to sort out. You're not having sole custody of Evie."
Victoria blinked then. "Wait," she said to him. "You're actually letting me go?"
"You'll come back," he said confidently on that point.
"I wouldn't bet on it," Victoria muttered and she moved to her feet. She began to move towards the staircase, but Homelander spoke, stopping her from moving any further.
"We belong together and you'll see that," Homelander told her.
"We might've done," Victoria agreed and she turned back around to face him, arms folding over her chest. "We might've belonged together at some point, but we don't know. You destroyed everything that we could've had. But you were lost before I even knew you. You raped Becca. You did that before we got together. You lied to me. You pretended to be the man you knew I'd want. Maybe…maybe if we could go back in time…if you'd have been raised with people who had loved you then we might have had a chance, but you weren't. You became this man and I am done making excuses for you…excuses for why you are so fucked up because at some point in your life you need to take responsibility for your own actions."
"Do you even know the weight of everything I have on my shoulders?" Homelander snapped at her, flapping his arms out to the side. "I have to carry the weight of Vought on them. I have to keep this country safe. You have no idea what it is like to have this purpose…to be chosen like I was because that's why I am here, Victoria. I am here because I was chosen to be here."
Victoria rolled her eyes at him. "You're here because Madelyn Stillwell groomed you to be here," she said to him. "She played on the fact that you'd never had a mother and she used you. She turned you into who she wanted you to be. If that had never happened then maybe we wouldn't be here and you wouldn't be spouting your shit."
"Watch your mouth," Homelander snapped at his wife, pointing his finger at her.
"Or what?" she demanded from him, moving towards him, the anger on her face apparent and Homelander heard her heart rate increase. "You think you're the only one who was dealt a shitty hand in life? You're not. You could've done good. You could've actually used your powers to help people, but your ego is so big that you can't see beyond anything other than yourself. You were doing this for your kids, right? Well, guess what, you've fucking lost them."
Homelander stammered then and Victoria pushed him even further, her face inches from his as she shouted at him.
"Evelyn is terrified of you because all she's seen you do recently is get angry at me and you don't know where Ryan is, do you? You haven't even bothered with him in recent weeks because you've been so busy with this ludicrous plan and then you scare him away. You destroy our entire apartment and you scare him off! You basically pushed him to Billy and that's what happened…and you don't even know what they were going to do."
"Where is my son?" Homelander demanded to know from her.
Victoria shrugged and he saw her begin to cry angry tears. "I don't know!" she screamed at him and all of her frustrations came out. "I don't know where he is, John, because he left and I couldn't stop him. He left when I told him the truth…everything about you."
Homelander's lips parted and he shook his head as he felt a ringing in his ears. His son knew. His son couldn't know.
"Why the fuck would you do that?" Homelander demanded from his wife, teeth bared in a snarl as he lifted his hand up and took hold of her chin between his thumb and forefinger, forcing her to look him in the eye. "You fucking bitch!"
"You think I wanted to tell him?" Victoria questioned from him. "I had no other choice because Billy and Mallory told him. They'd told him and I couldn't stop them, but I couldn't lie to him either. He deserves the truth. He deserves it because all he's known are lies and I'm done with lying."
"And there she is!" Homelander yelled, pushing her chin away from him and letting his arms raise up high. "My wife, the pillar or honesty. Mother fucking Theresa and the perfect fucking martyr."
"I never claimed to be any of those things!" Victoria yelled back at him. "I am just tired of the lies. I am tired of constantly being under your thumb and, despite what you think, I have those kids' best interests at heart. I love them and I am trying to put them first. Can you say the same thing? Making Ryan do stuff he doesn't want to do? Destroying the entire apartment and scaring him?"
"And you're the perfect mother, are you? You're not even Ryan's mom and you know that."
"I might not be his mum, but I love him like my own and I would never treat him like you did," Victoria hissed. "And you have no idea what I've done for him. Billy tried to turn him against you. He tried to tell him that he was the only one who could kill you, but I got him out of there. I told him that he didn't have to, but by then he knew about you. I had to sit with him and tell him about Flight 37…how you wiped my memories…and how you raped his mother. Do you have any fucking idea how hard that was? It was heartbreaking and you…you fucking did that!"
"You could've told them they were lying. You want to protect our children? You do whatever it takes!" his arm moved through the air dramatically and Victoria shook her head at him.
"And it's always on me, isn't it?" Victoria said. "It's always on me to protect them while you go and do whatever the fuck you want and expect me to cover for you, but I'm done. I'm done with this and with you. You're not raising Evie to be like that and Ryan…if he comes back to me…then I'll never let him be raised like that either. I won't let him be trained to kill you, but I won't let you turn him into you."
"He's my son."
"Maybe, but he deserves better than you as a father," Victoria retorted to her husband and she moved towards the staircase, but Homelander followed her. He stood on the bottom step as she took the first one up and he moved his hand to trap hers on the banister. "Let go, John."
"You think this is over?" Homelander demanded from his wife. "You think that I am going to let them go without a fight? Let you go without a fight?"
"The point is that there never had to be a fight," Victoria said. "Despite knowing what I do, I'd have left with you. I'd have run away with you because it would've stopped this. It would've stopped innocent people getting hurt, but you wouldn't do it. You wouldn't do it and so now we're done. You can't fight for something if there's nothing left."
He moved quickly then, forcing his lips against hers in desperation for her to see that there was something worth fighting for. She pushed against his chest as his fingertips dug into her waist and she swore that she'd bruise there. His lips moved over hers and Victoria knew she'd never get the upper hand physically and so she kissed him back, but she swept her tongue over his lower lip, causing him to gasp before she bit down on it as hard as she could. Wincing then, he pulled back from her and saw how her cheeks were tinged red and she was breathless.
Raising her hand, she slapped him on the cheek, but it didn't do anything to him. His head didn't even turn to the side. She just stood there, her chest heaving against his before she lifted a hand up and grabbed his hair, fingers tangling into it and she bent back down to kiss him, her eyes closed as she told herself that this was the final time. He moved his hands to her skirt, rucking it up to her hips and reaching for his belt. He unbuckled it with one hand before moving his fingers in between her legs, tearing his lips from hers and hearing her gasp with need. Closing her eyes, she titled her head back as he thrust into her, pushing her underwear to the side with his fingers.
He wasn't gentle and she didn't want him to be. He took her at an awkward angle, laid on the spiral staircase and she was certain she'd bruise in the morning as his grunts became even more strained and he ripped her shirt open, lips moving over the swell of her breasts as she gripped hold one of the spindles in the railing of the staircase.
Neither of them lasted long and Homelander collapsed against her chest, kissing the valley between her breasts and she just laid there, her legs spread around him as she felt her thighs ache. Billy's words echoed in her mind and he was right. She knew that he was right. It just killed her to know it.
"Well, this isn't a sight I was expecting to see."
Homelander managed to tuck himself back into his pants, pulling them up and fastening his belt as he watched Victoria tug her shirt around herself considering he'd destroyed the buttons on it. He stood up and Victoria followed suit, her skirt falling down her legs.
"What're you doing here?" Homelander demanded.
Sage walked in, carrying a balloon that read 'congratulations' on it. She let it go and it fluttered up to the ceiling.
"Where's Ryan and Evie? This was all for them after all, right?" Sage questioned.
"Everything turned to shit. The plan is dead," Homelander said.
"This is the plan," Sage replied and Victoria wondered what she was going on about. She let her brow furrow and she knew that whatever was going to come out of Sage's mouth next was not going to be good. "Unless, of course, you don't want this plan and she's managed to persuade you otherwise," Sage commented, "I mean, I didn't expect to catch the two of you in a post-coital embrace."
"It was a mistake," Victoria simply spoke, folding her arms over her chest and keeping her shirt covering her. "I'm leaving him."
"Of course you are," Sage said in a sarcastic tone. "I mean, you threw a good few curveballs, Victoria, I'm not going to deny that. There were some things I had to keep to myself because I wasn't sure how you'd fit in this plan and because he…well…he's so enamoured by you that he might fuck up with you around."
Homelander looked less than impressed with that.
"Neuman would have been a patsy," Sage continued, pushing on with her explanation and Victoria wondered if she'd ever seen her look so entertained and gleeful before. "She'd have been stubborn with too many ideas. It was why she was going to go with your wife and betray you. I had to go down another route."
And then she looked to the screen on the TV where Singer appeared, clearly being covertly recorded.
"If you'd have killed Neuman like I'd ordered then we wouldn't be stuck for stories underground."
Victoria watched the screen then fill with images of her brother, Annie, Hughie, M.M., Frenchie, Kimiko and Alex. She couldn't make out the wording on the banner at the bottom of the screen because it was smashed, but she could guess what it said. They were all wanted for working with Singer to kill Neuman. They were going to be blamed for killing her because Singer had ordered them to. Singer had been arrested and taken into custody too.
"No," Victoria breathed out, feeling dizzy and sick.
Sage turned the television off and then pulled her phone from her pocket. "Oh, it's for you," she said and held the phone up in Homelander's direction.
"Who is it?" he questioned.
"Speaker of the House Calhoun. Once they invoke the twenty-fifth, he's next in line to be President and he'd like to pledge his allegiance to you," Sage said and Homelander took a step towards her and Victoria knew that this was bad. This was worse than she could ever imagine.
"To me?" Homelander checked.
Sage nodded. "Just like I promised. We had a deal."
"I broke the deal," Homelander reminded her.
"I didn't," Sage hissed at him, drawing the phone to her chest. "I told you that you could trust me. I've got your back," she said and held the phone back towards him, urging for him to take it. But he didn't. He just stood there, trying to weigh Sage up.
"I threw you out like garbage. Why would you do this?"
"To see if I could," Sage said to him. "Thank you," she said gratefully and he took the phone from her. "This was so much fun…just…next time…listen to me," she urged from him and bent down to pick up her notebook from the floor that he'd taken from her.
"Next time?" Homelander questioned.
"Hell's yeah, blond ambition," Sage said and started to walk away. "Buckle up for phase two."
Whatever she had planned, Victoria knew that Sage was even more dangerous than her husband. Victoria had gone from feeling a sense of relief that he thought his plan had failed to feeling the greatest dread she'd ever felt before. Her husband turned to face her and Victoria knew what he was going to do as he tried to compose himself. She didn't even bother telling him not to do it, not to take the call. She knew that he would. Nothing she said would make any difference.
He maintained eye contact as he pressed accept on the call and spoke into the receiver. "Homelander speaking."
Victoria didn't stick around to see what he said. She went upstairs and packed her case, grabbing documents including their passports and all of her bank cards. She took the photo she had of her, Daniella and Michelle alongside the photo Billy had given her for Christmas. She packed as many clothes into the big case as she could before lugging it back down the stairs to where Homelander was stood waiting for her having finished his call.
"Your friends are on the run," he told her. "There's evidence that they killed Neuman which isn't entirely false. Anything you say about mine and Sage's plan…there's no evidence…everyone who knew anything about me at Vought has been taken care of. There's no one with any dirt on me…no proof…nothing…"
"Except me," Victoria reminded him, wheeling the case over towards the door.
"It would be your word against mine and we both know no one is likely to believe you," Homelander said to her.
Victoria tugged her coat back on and slung her satchel over her shoulder. Homelander watched her pull her coat from the collar and it swung down her back. Looking to her husband, Victoria wondered just what was going to happen next.
"You can walk out of that door," Homelander said to her, "but we both know you'll be back. Why don't you make things easier on yourself, Victoria? Come home. Admit I won and come here. If you leave…if you declare war on me…you know that you'll never win. You'll not be able to bring me down."
"Maybe, maybe not," Victoria agreed with him on that point, "but you know I like a challenge."
She moved her hand to take hold of her engagement ring and wedding ring. She pulled them off of her finger and set them down on the sideboard. Homelander felt a stabbing pain in his chest before his teeth ground together and he wanted to yell at her to put them back on. She let her hand linger over them for a brief moment before she let go and left them there, going to the suitcase.
"Goodbye, John," Victoria said to her husband and she wheeled it out of the door.
"I'll see you soon, sweetheart," he called out to her. "Very soon, indeed."
…
Going to the hotel where they were staying, Victoria saw that Natalie was playing with Evelyn in the living room. Victoria shrugged out of her coat and checked her phone. She'd text Ryan where she was, but she hadn't heard back from him yet. She dropped her phone onto the coffee table and left her bag on the floor.
"Mummy!" Evie shouted excitedly and she wondered where she'd gotten her energy from.
"Hey, baby," Victoria said and she knelt down on the floor in front of her and then looked up to Natalie. "Everything okay?"
"She's been no bother at all," Natalie promised her with a genuine smile.
"Natalie, can I ask you to stay for a bit longer? I can pay…I just need a minute with Evie and then I need to do something."
"I'll be in the bedroom," Natalie said. "And don't worry about paying me extra…I…I'm just glad to see that you're alright."
Victoria smiled tiredly to the young woman who left her alone with her daughter. Victoria moved to take hold of Evelyn's waist, holding onto her as she stood up and stared at her mother with inquisitive eyes. Victoria brushed her daughter's hair back from her face. "I know that you're only little, Evie, and a lot has happened that seems confusing."
"Where's daddy?"
"Well, daddy…we just have to be apart for a little while," Victoria settled on saying to her. "But I need you to know that I love you, okay? Everything that I do is because I love you so very much."
"How much?" she wondered.
Victoria stretched her arms out wide. "This much," she said and Evelyn laughed and Victoria realised that she really was too young to understand what was going on. "And I always will love you, baby. Me and you, alright?"
"I love you too, mummy," Evelyn just said to her and Victoria embraced her tightly before she stood up with her and her daughter clung to her shoulders.
"Come on, sweetie, it's time for bed," Victoria said and she carried her into the bedroom with the double bed. Natalie was already in there with the suitcase. "There's some clothes in there…and her books and cuddly toy," Victoria said. "Do you mind getting her ready for bed? There's just something I need to do."
"Of course," Natalie agreed.
Victoria set Evelyn down on the double bed and kissed her forehead before saying goodnight. Walking back into the living room, Victoria sat down on the edge of the sofa. She picked her phone up and thought about her next move. It would either work or no one would listen to her. She couldn't go against Homelander like she wanted to. Her husband and Sage had clearly covered their tracks well. And so she had to go down another road. She had to try another tactic.
Picking her phone up, she noticed the absence of her wedding and engagement ring, her skin paler from where they'd been sat. She'd left him. She'd had to leave him, but she was on her own now. The Boys were wanted fugitives and the evidence against them was too substantial in its forgery for Victoria to challenge. Her brother was on the run too with his own agenda. And so it was down to Victoria. She had to do something and the idea of doing it on her own terrified her, but it was better than staying silent.
Unlocking her phone, she clicked onto her social media account and let her finger hover over the live stream button. She hesitated before she pressed it and she knew that this was it and, in a strange sense, she felt lighter than she had done in a long time.
"Hi everyone," she spoke into the screen, looking at her reflection before she continued, seeing the viewer numbers rise. "I know that I've never done this before…I've never wanted to, truth be told, but I don't think now is the time to stay silent and so I…I've got to do this," she said and she stared at herself in the screen with conviction. "I've got to stand up and I've got to try to do the right thing."
She inhaled a deep breath then and let it out shakily, shrugging her shoulders.
"So here goes…"
…
A/N: And season four is almost done...how do we think it might end? There's going to be some deep chats and will Victoria be able to go against Homelander? I can't believe how long we have to wait for season five, but I might do some filler chapters to keep us going. As always, would love to know your thoughts - you guys really are the best!
