He grunted, looking down at the freshly stitched wound in his side, realizing with a frown that all the pain now left him painfully sober.

Looking around the stables, he figured his wineskin was likely empty, but he didn't want to go into the house now, not when she just headed there. No, he wanted to go the opposite direction, away from here, from her.

He found himself walking into the grove behind the barn when he realized she was right behind him.

"Ares, you're drunk and bleeding — where the hell do you think you're going?"

"None of your damn business."

"Just go to bed."

Then, just when he thought the night couldn't get any worse, the sudden flash of red light illuminated the darkness. Fucking hell… they must have walked out of the power shield; which he hadn't even told Xena about yet. He had meant to do it earlier today but then it just…

"Oh, he will," Alecto purred, casting a glare at Xena, and then turning to him. "Wanna go back to bed, darling?"

He hadn't been that sober ever since they arrived at the house days ago. Ignoring his racing heartbeat and the rage now filling his every cell, he forced himself to stay calm and think rationally. He could still walk out it alive if he played his cards well, but he had to act fast, before Xena went and fucked it all up. Xena surely wanted to kill him now but hopefully, she wanted to kill Alecto more. It was a perfect opportunity to get rid of the bitch; there might not be a second chance as good as this one.

"Alecto, I thought you forgot all about me…" he said, his fingers wrapping around the dagger that he miraculously hadn't left behind in the stables and which was now resting in his pocket.

"I'm sorry, darling, it took me a while to recover from our last date… three days of fucking takes its toll even on immortals — but you do know that, don't you…"

"Yeah, about that… you didn't happen to drug me or anything, did you? You see, somehow, I don't recall any of it." He tried to stall, cringing at how lame he sounded; with a sideway glance, he noticed Xena's jaw twitch, her lips pursing, but apart from that and the narrow-eyed glare, she was calm and alert, her eyes on Alecto. Now, he only needed to pass her the dagger while Alecto was distracted enough. And hope that she wouldn't use it on him first.

"Oh, I don't think your dick would have been that hard if you were drugged, honey," Alecto mused, making him grimace. Well, yes, they had fucked, but it was just once, here in the forest; afterwards they went to Olympus for a bit and then he woke up in the barn—

He held his breath when Alecto turned to Xena. "I hope you're not jealous I borrowed him for a while…"

Alert, he watched in anticipation as Xena stepped towards Alecto.

"Oh no, you can keep him. An ex-Olympian… not bad, for a third-rate deity."

Ares gripped the hilt of the dagger, fighting the grin. Godsdamn, she was good.

"You mortal trash…" Alecto hissed, suddenly slipping out of her classy manner.

"Say again?" Xena asked with deadly calm and — before he could blink — his jaw dropped to the floor as Alecto dropped to her knees, gasping for breath.

"I'm sorry, you were saying…?" Xena repeated, her hands gripped around the throat of the choking woman kneeling in front of her.

The very next second Xena was straddling her, Alecto gurgling under her grip.

He stared, entranced by the scene in front of him; he never pictured Xena with a woman but damn, they did look good together.

Then, Alecto went limp, and it was over.

He shook his head, exhilarated by the whole scene, the reality sinking in; or was it even real? He had to be dreaming. Xena just murdered Alecto with her bare hands, he didn't even have time to throw her the dagger. There was dark fire radiating of her that he hadn't felt in a long time, it almost made his skin crawl. He felt his pants tighten. Gods, he wanted to ravage her, even more so when she threw him a murderous glare when she passed him by.

"Xena, wait…"

But she didn't. Without as much as a glance back his direction, she headed back towards the house.

He had to run after her, he couldn't leave it at that.

But then, what was he going to say? That it wasn't what she thought it was?

"Xena."

He jumped in front of her, blocking her way, grabbing her arms. She didn't shake him off, but she didn't look at him either.

"I took care of your wound, Ares, go to bed," she said, her voice hollow.

"She took me to Olympus to offer me a deal to get the ambrosia. Next thing I knew, I was back here with everyone telling me how I was gone for three days—"

"I was worried sick about you, you fucking two-faced asshole..."

"She drugged me!"

"Good for you."

"Xena, I was blacked out for three days—"

"Just don't—"

"No, you will fucking listen to me!" he snapped, shaking her by the arms. "You were never going to give me a chance anyway, so you don't get to make a scene when I try to get my fucking life back after you leave me here tomorrow like you did after Olympus."

She swallowed, and didn't say anything for a while.

"I'm sorry I blew your chance to get your life back," she finally spoke, and he couldn't tell if she was serious or just ironic. "I'll get you your godhood back, there are other ways."

He felt a wave of cold misery wash over him. How the fuck could she be so indifferent?

He didn't want the damn ambrosia anymore, he wanted her, and he wanted her to stay with him, not look at him with those cold, empty eyes, and offer to make him a god again, the stubborn, annoying bitch — for fuck's sake... gods, he wanted to howl… Swallowing the blood sipping from the inside of his cheek where he just sank his teeth, he blinked rapidly when his vision slightly blurred.

His chest rising and falling rapidly, he was staring at her and didn't know if he wanted to fuck her or kill her. "I don't care about the ambrosia, just stay," he blurted in a spur of a moment, his pride making him regret it the very second the words left his mouth.

"Ares, I can't even trust you — not that I ever could, but somehow, seeing you human I let myself treat you as one for a while, despite my better instincts — and here you are, the same deceitful, manipulative piece of scum you've always been—"

"You're just-"

"No, you shut up and you fucking listen to me now. It's not just about you plotting with Alecto behind my back, risking both our lives for your personal gain, while trying to get to me in the meantime…"

"She was after you and I tried to protect you—"

"Oh, please… you have deception in your blood –- pretending to have no memories of the fight just to mess with me and push my buttons – you just can't help yourself even with the smallest of things, can you…"

"Why does that even matter? You lied about your memories too! I was just playing..."

"Were you even actually drunk, or was that an act to make me more likely to sleep with you?"

"I'm sorry, what?" Ares laughed heartily. "You know, Xena — call me blind but it's never occurred to me that you had such low standards — well, it did when you fucked Hercules — but I had no idea they were so low that getting shitfaced might increase my chances with you — ouch, that's not classy, Xena — do you make a habit of taking advantage of drunk men, or am I your first?"

He closed his eyes briefly, wiping the spit off his face and catching the fist coming at his face. He knew her muscles were still weakened so it only took a swift low kick to get her to fall down, her back on the grass.

He looked her in the eye when he untied his pants, sneering at how she was burning with rage but how her eyes shone with such raw need, so beautiful.

Dropping down to his knees, he spread her legs open and positioned himself between them. Her eyes were full of hate, need and something else he couldn't pinpoint. She spat in his face again, making him livid. He pushed himself inside roughly, making her sink her nails in the nape of his neck, and gods, it drove him wild.

"Oh, and while we're at it — drunk or not — there's no amount of liquor in the world to make me forget how much you craved to be mine to do what I want with you — oh, but that's what you wanted to hide from me in the first place, isn't it," he sneered, spitting her in the face and biting her hand after it left a burning mark on his cheek. "You fucking hypocrite, I'm gonna fuck you till you can't walk," he hissed, driving himself hard into her, biting her neck, biting down so hard that he tasted her blood on his lip; he could swear she pulled his hair out when she then grabbed a fistful. "I'm gonna bite your head off and fuck your throat from the inside…"

He tried his best to stop himself from taking a step too far, and she wasn't helping — gods, she was rabid, urging him on until he was afraid he would lose it and hurt her for real.

"Stop." He grabbed her wrists, pinning them down to the ground with a thud. "Just fucking stop it!" he growled, waiting for her to come round, waiting for her eyes to open. Trying to catch his breath, he removed a strand of hair from across her face, wiping the sweat off her forehead. When her eyes opened, they were wild, burning with so much fire, livid.

She tried to slap him but he caught her hand before it reached his face.

"Don't. I don't wanna hurt you," he uttered, his breath calming down. As soon as he spoke, her face changed. Her eyes welled up with tears; she looked like she was about to cry.

"I'm sorry…" he blurted before he knew it, watching the tears stream silently down her face, a lump in his throat making it hard to breathe.

"Fuck off," she pushed him off and sat up.

He winced, the sharp pain in his side reminding him of the stitches.

So, here they were again, back to square one.

He was too tired to argue, to even be angry. He just wanted to go to bed, and put this nightmare of a day behind him.

He put his hand on her back.

"Don't touch me," she uttered in a flat, expressionless voice.

He removed his hand and, slowly, he stood up.

She was sitting on the grass at his feet, her head down; he couldn't see her face, it was covered with a veil of her disheveled hair. He considered just picking her up and carrying her back to the house.

"Just leave," she said in the same indifferent tone as before, only quieter.

He didn't want to leave her here, in the middle of a forest, in the middle of the night, in the state she was in. But there was something so cold in her voice; something definite and ultimate, that filled him with such dread that he couldn't move.

So, that was it.

It was over.

He had to leave, before he lost it. But he needed to make sure that it was definite, that she really meant it.

"Xena, if I leave now, that's it. It's over. I won't speak to you tomorrow, and I won't look for you, ever."

"Just fuck off and go!" she prompted, her voice oddly emotionless even though raised.

"I mean it, Xena. I can't have you in my life if I can't be with you, it fucks me up too much," he said, feeling the fucking tears fall despite his attempts to blink them away.

"Good, so it works both ways. Just go," she sniffled. "Please," she added in a whisper.

"If that's what you want," he said. And waited, foolishly hoping she would stop him. But when the excess moisture he tried to keep under his lids finally streamed down his face, he turned around so she didn't see it.

#

"If that's what you want," his voice reached her; calm resignation to it.

It's not what I want, it's what I need, you fucking asshole. "Just go," she forced the words out once more.

A stupid part of her wished he wouldn't listen.

She raised her head slightly, enough to see him through the veil of her hair. She saw he still hesitated, for a moment.

And then he did — turned around and left.

She collapsed on the grass, on her side, curling up into fetal position, her chest heavy with such soul-crushing despair she could feel it clutching around her neck. She wondered if this was what Alecto felt when she strangled her.