CHAPTER 12: MORE MERYL

This wasn't going to be easy. Meryl took a deep breath. "It's about Valentine's Day, you see. Well, it's not always everything it's cracked up to be. When you're in love, sure. But when you're just kind of…going through the motions…that somehow only makes it worse…."

Gordo scowled. "You and Tudge?"

Meryl nodded. "Yeah," she admitted. "Me and Tudge. It's been this way for a while now. We don't talk about it. But we both know it's coming. I'm pretty sure he's just hanging on now so that we don't have to break up right before Valentine's Day. Or worse yet,onValentine's Day. I know he still cares about me and doesn't want me to be distressed or anything. You know…. embarrassed…. pitied…"

"Yeah, I know how that is," Gordo said meaningfully. "Being pitied…"

Meryl shrugged sheepishly. "Sorry. Anyway, after Valentine's, after the Dance and all, if he doesn't say something, I think I will. I really think one of us needs to. Don't get me wrong, Gordon. We had a good run. You know? I don't regret anything. I just feel….it's getting time to move on. And I'm pretty sure he feels that way too."

"Wow," Gordo said, "I had no idea, Mer." He paused, then… "Well, actually, I guess I hadsomeidea. I mean, I could kind of sense something these last few weeks, maybe in the last month or so, that something wasn't quite right between you two…"

Gordo sat up straight. "Is there someone else?" he asked suddenly.

Meryl eyed him curiously. "You mean is Tudge cheating on me? I doubt it. I think he's way too honorable for that. He's been a good boyfriend. He wouldn't do that. If he wanted to go with someone else, he would break up with me first. The same way Nicole did with you."

"Well, what about you?" Gordo asked, then quickly corrected, "D'oh! I don't mean would you cheat on him, I know you wouldn't. I mean…I mean…"

And then he started to feel dizzy.

But Meryl looked him straight in the eye and quietly asked, "Whatdoyou mean…?"

He turned away. He couldn't look at her right now. Suddenly he could distinctly feel his heart beating inside his chest as he heard himself unexpectedly blurt out, "I mean…is there anyone else you might be…interested in?"

Wow! Where had that come from? What was he saying? What was he doing? He wasn't sure what was going on. Sure, there had some been some feelings lately, buried deep down inside, subconscious imaginings that came out in dreams, but quickly poofed away the moment he woke up. He almost didn't know what he had been dreaming. But as soon as he got to school and saw Meryl walking into her first period English class, he got that warm tingly feeling— the kind his cousin Adam had warned him would someday happen with a girl other than Lizzie.

So now he closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and waited quietly until his head stopped spinning. And a thought came to him, shiny and new, and he let it sit there for a moment, finally set free in his conscious mind, and it was calling to him.

Oh my God. I think I like Meryl…

For a few moments, he felt time was standing still, but then he felt Meryl gently tug the hem of his pants, very like he had done to her, just a few minutes ago. Had it really only been a few minutes?

When he opened his eyes, the whole world had changed. He looked at Meryl and she was looking right back at him, her eyes large and sparkling green, but very serene. It was a telling, electrifying moment. They both realized what they were beginning to deal with, but it was not so easy to come right out and talk about it, especially after all that talk about "cheating."

Meryl drew herself up, her eyes piercing his as she very boldly said, "Well….yeah. There is somebody I like. There's somebody that I'm thinking about, somebody that I'm…lookingat….you know, and hoping….."

Gordo felt he was going to burst as she continued looking at him. She did meanhim, didn't she? Why would she say that unless she meant him? But his razor-sharp brain failed him now when he most needed it, and he could think of nothing to say in response, no question or comment that would move this conversation further along to clarify what he was hoping to be true.

Fortunately, Meryl still seemed to have her wits about her and continued, "Of course, I couldn't officially say anything to…this person…while Tudge and I are still together."

"Oh, of course not!" Gordo exclaimed, suddenly feeling as if he had been kicked in the pants. "I understand. I understand perfectly. In fact, there's this girl I like, at least I'm just sort of beginning to realize I probably like, but of course I wouldn't be free to say anything to her on account of me still being with Nicole."

"But you're not with Nicole anymore," Meryl reminded. "That obstacle has been removed."

"You're right, " Gordo agreed. "It has."

"Then….then…what about her? This new girl?" Meryl asked. "Is she free?"

Very carefully, Gordo said, "Not yet. But I think she may be. Soon."

"How soon?" Meryl wondered.

""Well, maybe after Valentine's Day."

"I don't suppose….I don't suppose you'd want to mention any names?" Meryl suggested, wondering as much as Gordo if there might be some way she could put a seal of confirmation on what they were talking about.

"I…I don't think it would be advisable at this point," Gordo said.

"Oh," Meryl replied, and then she looked away, all at once feeling that the moment had grown entirely too intense. Surely he would know, just by looking at her. How could he not know?

After this, they sat quietly for a moment, looking first at the floor, then at each other, catching each other's eye with a sheepish smile.

"So then, " Meryl said at last, "as for Valentine's Day, maybe not so good for either of us this year, huh? But after Valentine's Day, things could be looking up. For both of us. You think so, Gordon?"

Gordo nodded. "Yes. I think so. But could I ask you something, Mer?"

"Sure, Gordon. You know you can ask me anything."

"It's just this. The 'Gordon' thing. It's okay. But before, when you called me David….that was nice. Much nicer than Gordon."

"Well…okay. David."

"And if…if you even wanted to call me Dave….well, that would be okay too. In fact, that would be more than okay."

Meryl grinned at him, her freckles about to pop off her face. "Okay," she said quietly. "Okay….Dave…"

And here David Gordon actually blushed, so strongly that his skin was nearly the color of Meryl's hair. And it would have been a very awkward moment, neither of them knowing what to say next, but before any awkwardness could set in, the scrawny Mad Lib kid reappeared in the aisle, dragging his mother by the hand and exclaiming, "Look, Mom! Look! Mad Libs! Can you believe it? Mad Libs!"

Now Gordo and Meryl really did laugh, and Meryl touched his knee and said, "Hey….Dave…can I buy you a chai tea?"

Gordo felt himself tingling from the inside out. "Well, sure, Mer," he grinned. "Since you asked so nicely…"

They stood up, both helping each other to their feet. It was hard to say who helped who more, but in a moment they were standing, laughing, and walking together toward to café.