Persona 5: Daywatch

Wednesday, 17 August 2016
Late Afternoon
Togo's Temple, Central Shrine

When the Thieves gathered around a tall, wooden gate, Hifumi stepped up to read the placard alongside them. "I can fill a room or just one heart. Others can have me, but I can not be shared." She clasped her gloved hands to her chest and whispered, "Mother, why didn't you tell me?"

Reaper – or rather, Ryuji – hung his head. "Dude, I am so ready to be done with this place." When Futaba jabbed him in the side, he exclaimed, "Peeps outta just be straight-up with each other!"

Makoto scratched her head. "I don't understand how others can have a thing that can't be shared. It's self-contradictory."

"No," Ann said, her voice low. "Not if it's a condition they each have. It's loneliness."

As distant gears clacked and the gate slid into the wall, Yusuke took her hand and squeezed. Despite the gloves of her thief costume, Hifumi's hands felt cold all of the sudden and she looked aside at Akira. His eyes were on her hand, but when their gazes met, he blushed and looked away.

She was glad when the team leader strode into the foyer and she followed despite her own sense of cold. Like Yasaka Shrine in her last class trip of Ogawa, a trough of water with old-style ladles arranged along it stretched through the center of the foyer. Figuring it would be impolite to ignore, Hifumi picked up a ladle, then searched her glove for the termination point between it and the sleeve.

Futaba trotted past. "Don't bother, it's prolly a trap." The Thieves all gathered just inside the foyer.

Ryuji swatted his hand at the air. "Damn, and I thought the fog was thick outside."

Hifumi looked across the enormous courtyard, walls stretching tens of meters to the right and left and a hill rising in front of them with a path of paving stones winding up the rise. Dark stone torches rose up in pairs along the path, and willow trees like weeping widows sprouted from the rising earth. "What fog?"

Futaba pointed her staff-weapon up the hill at the offering hall to the right. "The fog pouring from behind that hill. That building's the center of the shrine, right?"

Hifumi held her hand over her brow, out of habit. "That's not even all the way up the hill. Though I have difficulty believing there's a snow-covered mountain right behind it."

Then that 'snow-covered mountain' got up and loped up the far side of the slope at them.

"Close ranks!" Hifumi shouted. "But hold your fire, you don't want Antalas to think you're inviting him to play."

"Antalas?" Makoto said, before the cognitive likeness of her dog – if such could apply to a beast standing over four meters tall at the shoulder – closed. Futaba was the first, but the others snapped up their weapons before remembering the shogi player's warning to hold fire. The blade-like claws on his forepaws cut gouges in a paving stone and his muzzle peeled back to bear rows of sharp fangs as he growled.

Hifumi took to the front line, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Yusuke and Ryuji. "Sit, Antalas!"

The deep and threatening growl came to a sharp termination, and the enormous canine's rear end came to rest on the turf.

The other Phantom Thieves stared, but after a few moments realized they had to move. Makoto stepped up, keeping her eyes up and her weapon trained on Antalas' general vicinity even after getting far enough she definitely couldn't see the cognition.

"Stay," Hifumi commanded as she backed up to follow the others. The real Antalas would have stood and whined, hating being further than a few meters from her, but Mother appeared to think absolute obedience just appeared rather than being an exchange of mutual time and respect. The cognition's tail thumped against the wall, but he stayed put as Hifumi joined the end of the train of Thieves ascending the stone path.

She heard Futaba reading the placard at the next door.

"I haunt you at day and stalk you at night.
Watchmen call me bright,
yet I can take the sun's light.
Home of gods, warren of fools, beware when I'm not in sight."

Yusuke tapped a knuckle against his lip. "I can think of many matches to individual pieces. Mountaintops are often home to gods and a place of watching in mythology."

Akira scratched his head. "But 'warren of fools'?"

Makoto tapped her fingers on the barrel of her shotgun, keeping it ready in case cognitive Antalas stalked closer. "Hawk-san, what kind of people did your mother consider 'fools'?"

The shogi player felt weight press down on her shoulders. "People who don't come out ahead in business. Especially people who don't demand payment up-front. She's even more knowledgeable about psychology than finances, and leverages that without mercy. Despite Catholicism being closer to Judaism in treating charity as a necessary duty than magnanimous act. She still fought Papa when it came to tithe."

Morgana tapped his folded crossbow against his crossed arm. "So she'd consider people who work hard without getting paid first to be suckers."

Ryuji almost dropped his club in the haste to straighten. "Oh! Like the rabbit makin' mochi on the moon!"

The door slid aside and Ann's stare shone clear despite her feline mask. "Wow. Reaper figured out a puzzle!"

He rolled his eyes. "Eff you."

Makoto cleared her throat. "Inside. Before that giant dog comes out of the fog again."

More glassed-in displays of moments in Mother's life scattered across the long walls. Papa presenting a ring to her in an upscale restaurant. One of NHK's night-time anchorman's desks. The dean presenting Mother's degree in finances. A man in a fine silk suit handing Mother a business card. A boy handing a white snowbell flower to a girl with Mother's brown hair. Hifumi felt like pouting extra hard at that last one, with Mother having chased off all her boyfriends. The Thieves proceeded into the safe room nestled in the far side and treated the shrinking poison damage on Makoto's arm, but with nowhere else to go they returned to the courtyard.

They paced down the stone path until Futaba slowed to a stop, staring up in curiosity. Thunder rumbled and she pointed her staff weapon at the sky. "Hey, guys. I can see the antennas on the top of the tower. Damn, this thing must be a TV studio with all that hardware."

"Anybody else think the fog's thinner?" Ryuji blurted, a smile on his face under his skull mask.

Futaba's frown remained as she stared at the pagoda towering above them. "Why does that not make me feel good?"

Morgana paced to the enormous double-doors leading into the pagoda's ground floor. Iron banding criss-crossed the doors, and he pressed a hand against them. Then rapped his collapsed crossbow against it, getting a faint but solid tapping. "All men seek me, but gods and kings may never know me."

Ann scratched her head. "Everyone I can think of that people seek, gods and kings already have. Health, power, wealth."

Hifumi glanced at Yusuke. She'd seen his high marks in history, but his eyes darted back and forth in the matter of a man sorting through a huge volume of possibility. Her gaze moved to Akira's stormy grey eyes. If anybody understood, he must. "Think you have it?"

"It's not safety. Baldur and Cronus were both gods, and both killed." He uncrossed his arms, a look of resolution on the face not concealed by that avian domino mask. "I fundamentally disagree with your mother's idea that everyone seeks it, but 'never know' reminds me of Exodus 20:3. I think it's equality."

Hifumi smiled. "Close. It's an equal."

Gears clacked low underneath them and the door slid aside. The pagoda speared up at the churning clouds above, but despite the modest architecture she read about in the real world, the door and the corridor were large enough to drive a tractor-trailer through at full speed. Hanging torches bathed the space in generous, golden light. The silk screen paintings bearing her mother's glamorous images wouldn't have even hampered a motorcycle.

Morgana readied his crossbow and locked the bayonet out. "Ground floor of the Hall of Adoration. Keep your eyes peeled, everyone." The rest of the Phantom Thieves tensed and Hifumi wondered what they had seen here. Despite being the interior of a pagoda, the gold gilding and polished darkwood could have fit the private palaces of emperors. The Phantom Thieves battled another cluster of Shadows and wound their way past a rope line tied to a fortress wall outside.

On the seventh floor, they came to a huge wood door lined with warding charms. They dimmed and tore when Hifumi ripped them apart to unseal the door and reveal what she hoped to be the last placard in Mother's palace.

"Often held but never touched,
always wet but never rusts,
often bites but seldom bit,
to use me well you must have wit."

Akira smirked and poked the dyed-blond track star. "Well, so much for you," he said, getting a chuckle out of Ann.

Ryuji jabbed back hard with his elbow.

Makoto held a hand to her lips, eyes distant with thought for a beat. "The tongue."

Clacking reverberated through the walls, iron and wood locking sections of the door pulled away, but unlike last time the door did not slide all the way out of their path and the Thieves had to grunt and push to slide open a door embossed with a gold, snarling dog's face. Beyond lay a treasure vault filled with jeweled ceramic statuettes resembling Mother or depicting the kanji for victory, wealth, fame, and safety. The room might have resembled a treasure vault were it not for the grand view of a balcony on the outer wall. A pearlescent, yet amorphous blob shimmered above a gold pedestal.

Morgana stopped next to it and turned to the Thieves. "Since we have two new members, I think some explanations are in order. This here is the Treasure."

Futaba held up the hand not holding her staff weapon. "Um? My Treasure was my whole Palace."

"The pyramid-ship, or the command center in the middle of it, to be specific," Morgana said. "This is the more usual form representing the seed from which the palace ruler's distorted desire sprang." His blue gaze rose to the shogi player. "I can tell from the way you're looking at it that you can sense something about it."

Hifumi clutched a hand against her chest. "There's a ringing from it, like a song in minor key. Now that I'm here looking at it, I realize I've been hearing it since I first awakened to Dihya. Like a capstone in an arch, everything in Mother's Palace points to it."

Morgana gave the girl in circuitry-tights a beat to nod before saying, "Yup! All we need to do is send the Palace Ruler a calling card in the real world to make it manifest here in a physical form we can steal, and then that distortion will be removed from the ruler's psyche. It may take some time for the ruler's cognition to finish re-organizing, but just like Kamoshida, your mother will look at the crimes she's committed with gaze unfettered by her distortion."

Akira reached out and rested a hand on her shoulder over her cloak. "She'll stop abusing you, and stop threatening other people."

Makoto nodded and slung her shotgun. "We'll have to make sure to have everything prepared. From the briefing Byakko gave me, the Treasure will only remain manifest for up to a day. And it's unlikely a second calling card will work, the cognition can't be changed back."

Yusuke took his hand away from its resting spot on his katana. "Do you think she could have anything to do with the condition of her husband? I tried investigating online, but nothing has specified what exactly he is suffering from."

Unable to bear the stifling sense of cold pressing down on her, Hifumi took hold of the hand Akira rested on her shoulder and squeezed to remind herself there was still human warmth in the world. "Guillain-Barré Syndrome, but we don't know what caused it. And even with the things we've seen in Mother's palace, I can't imagine that she'd have caused Papa's horrible sickness. I won't. She can't, it hurt her too much."

Ann took a closer step. "Hawk…"

Akira's other hand covered hers and she drew in a shaky breath. "Now that we have a route to the Treasure, we need to start on the calling card. Can you help us write it on group chat? Reaper and I can do the work of cutting out the physical copy."

"Today would have been a tutor and coach after the interview for Good Morning Japan, but I canceled those through the desk secretary. Mother will still be angry, so I will most likely be out of contact tomorrow." Hifumi squeezed back, swallowing against the lump in her throat, but she couldn't quite meet his eyes. "How soon can we… have everything ready to change Mother's heart?"

Morgana folded back the bayonet on his crossbow. "I always insist on a day of rest to prepare for the battle against the Palace Ruler's Shadow. They're always the strongest thing in the Palace." His gaze drifted to Futaba. "Generally. We want to be as rested and prepared as possible, especially since we only have one shot. That means Friday would be the earliest we could be ready to change the Palace Ruler."

Hifumi let go of his hand and stepped back from the group. "Then no matter what I have to do, I'll be here to help save Mother." Her voice cracked and she bowed, as much in thanks to the Phantom Thieves as to excuse not meeting their eyes. "It's like Mom's been sick so long, and being so close to her being well and having a family again… Thank you," she finished, bowing lower.

"Yo, yo," Ryuji piped in. "Thanks for the vote of confidence, but we ain't done yet. Thank us when it's done."

Ann stepped into her field of view. "Your mother took away your phone, right? Are you going to be able to get it back to help write the calling card draft over Phantom Thief chat?"

Hifumi stood, but avoided meeting eyes with the sexy model in red. "Mother usually locks my phone in a drawer under her makeup in the master bedroom, but I'm careful to put it back before she notices I've taken it so I don't think she realizes I can pick the lock yet. I'll text the group as soon as I get home. I'll just have to slip it back before she gets home, but the hostess club never lets her home until after eleven o'clock."

Yusuke nodded, though there was a pensiveness to him she didn't expect from the collected artist. "So late…"

Morgana nodded. "Very well. The fog has thinned considerably since yesterday, but we'll still need you to navigate us a way out of here."

Hifumi nodded. "Absolutely. And if everybody's ready on Friday, I'll be here to navigate us in. I'll sneak out of home if I have to." She glanced to the blonde who encouraged her to take her life back, in front of and behind the cameras. She straightened like Queen Togo would, and clenched a fist. It felt so much easier with Dihya thrumming within her. "Forces of chaos shall not prevail! These thieves shall steal the darkness itself and usher in a new age of light!"

Wednesday, 17 August 2016
Early Evening
Shibuya, 777 Convenience

Ann stepped inside and shook off her umbrella, her calculations to the nearest box of milk chocolate being thwarted by the uproar inside. There always tended to be a couple people in a convenience store on a busy street like this, especially during heat waves or rain, but more than a dozen people shuffled through the aisles and half again lined up in front of the register.

A woman with short brown hair locked gaze with her artist companion and cried out, "Thank God, I've been trying to call you and Kurusu-kun for two hours. Get changed in the back, I'll hold the register."

Ann blinked, her plans for a relaxing stroll under assault. Despite the hours in Togo's Palace, Akira's growing physical therapy tricks helped batter away some of the normal fatigue and soreness Ann thought was an inevitable part of the Metaverse. Just when Yusuke was starting to figure out how to be sweet and romantic. Then her phone rang, her agency on the ID. "Fine, you might as well go be mister hero. I'll take this."

Yusuke bowed and headed for the back door marked 'Staff' as Ann headed for a front corner where the outside downpour added a level of white noise that would give the crowded conditions as much privacy as she could expect. "Yes, Hayashi-san?"

"Takamaki-chan, you are not an easy lady to get a hold of," he said in a way that implied stern finger-wagging. "I just spent several hours today with a manager who would not take no for an answer. Your Edogawa shoot's been on the calendar too long to move, but would you be able to pick up a shoot with a model outside the agency on Tuesday?"

Ann didn't have to have Morgana there to know they might not have changed Togo's heart by then. "Tuesday? So soon?" She glanced out the window at the torrential rain. "Wait, you said model outside the agency. I thought we didn't do that."

"Togo wouldn't take no for an answer," Hayashi said, plaintive. "But this could be big, even for the agency. Huge for you. I tried to play it that your schedule's booked solid, but she wants you to do a costume shoot with the Venus of Shogi on Tuesday. Court ladies type thing. She's got it all planned out."

Ann already had the Phantom Thief group chat up and shot out a text, [Hifumi, are you back home yet?]

Makoto's ID lit up. [What's up?]

[Her mother found my agency.]

Futaba popped in. [Oh snap! You're not in trouble, are you? I haven't hacked into her private computer yet. Or yours.]

Three dots winked next to Makoto's ID. [Futaba, what did I say about computer crimes?]

"It's just that Tuesday is so soon and I've got a lot going on," Ann said so her manager wouldn't think she dropped the call, leaning against shelves of magazines. [Not in trouble per se, I'm just a little worried about how fast she found out who I was and everything. My manager in the agency is on the line and he says she's already trying to book me for a shoot with Hifumi.]

[Congratulations!] Ryuji sent. Ann wondered how many letters he would have gotten right if his mother hadn't locked the spell-checker on.

Akira sent, [She probably got your name from the housekeeper, and there can't be many blonde models in Tokyo. If she could find Makoto's sister is a prosecutor just from the couple of times Makoto and Hifumi played, and maybe hearing about it ONCE from Hifumi, her information network must be pretty extensive.]

"I understand," her agency manager said, not quite keeping the whine out of his voice. "But I'm serious when I say she wouldn't take no for an answer. Please say you can make a Tuesday shoot. It's a bit of a day starting at noon, but she's offering one-third pay up-front, the rest after successful completion."

Ann bumped her hip against the magazine shelves. "What's 'bit of a day'?"

She heard the creak of Hayashi's office chair. "Proposed schedule says six in the evening."

"Six hours?" she blurted. "That's longer than any of the shoots I've done!" It was more of a credit to the organization and preparedness of her agency so far, but most shoots tended to take half an hour with makeup and wardrobe, then just a couple hours posing for photographers after.

[This is sus,] Futaba texted.

Makoto replied, [I am inclined to agree. After the things she said about Dad, I wouldn't trust any plans she makes.]

Yuuki sent, [I think I'm missing some context. All this talk is about the mother of the Venus of Shogi? And you're trying to change her heart? Wouldn't this be an opportunity to get closer?]

"I emailed you the details, Takamaki-chan," Hayashi pleaded. "I know it's a long shoot, but it includes setup and clean-up. I had to haggle with her a bit, but Togo-san's willing to part with a pretty penny to get you on board."

[We're already almost at the end,] Akira sent the Phantom Thief chat. [All we need to do is challenge her Shadow, steal her Treasure, and she'll be free of whatever distortion turned her into a greedy, tyrannical bitch.]

Futaba's sent, [Now what would Hifumi think of such language?]

[Probably that it's unnecessary even if it's true,] Makoto texted.

Three dots winked next to Akira's ID, then disappeared. Ann wondered if Morgana was laughing at them. After a beat, he sent, [I don't think it's a bad idea.]

[wdym?] Futaba sent.

Akira texted, [We don't know for sure if we'll be able to change her heart by Sunday. I can't be there for her, but I don't want to leave her alone. At least if you go, you two will be able to keep an eye out for each other and back each other up if anything happens.]

[Like you asked her to do for me before you changed Madarame-san's heart,] Yusuke sent, before the staff door opened and he trotted behind the counter with that bright green-and-pink uniform shirt.

Ann felt a flutter in her heart at that. Akira asked Hifumi to look out for Yusuke when the artist was still in danger? And was still trying to send backup when he was the one in the hot seat if they couldn't change Mitsuyo's heart? She hoped Hifumi could get him to realize the quality in his own heart. "Sorry for the delay, Hayashi-san. I'll do it. Give me the evening to read the details in your email to be sure." She texted notice on the group chat.

[Thank you, Ann,] Akira texted.

Wednesday, 17 August 2016
Evening
Chiyoda, Togo Home

Hifumi donned the house slippers, then slipped into the house. She heard Mother's voice inside and made her way to the dining room, where her mother sat in front of a spread of fabric samples, phone in hand.

Whatever she had been saying, the conversation ended by the time the shogi player got to the long dining room with dark wood furnishings. Mother hit the close call button, then sat back with a satisfied smile on her face. "And the thug will be gone next week."

Her heart rate jumped despite being tired from Mother's Palace, and Hifumi stumbled out of cover and into the doorway. "M-Mother? Is something new happening?"

Mother's smile widened and she stood, then walked to the liquor cabinet. She sat down with a goblet and dark rum. "Never you worry, Dear. I've just worked out a big opportunity. I could only rearrange things so much, but you'll be on a shoot with your girlfriend on Tuesday." She uncapped the glass bottle and poured herself a modest serving. "You look spent. Don't exhaust yourself on long walks with that mutt, especially in this weather. Get up to your room and study. You need to be well-rested for your appointment with the personal trainer tomorrow. I expect exceptional results."

Thursday, 18 August 2016
Late Morning
Yongen, Leblanc

Setting the last of his groceries into what little space he could cram into Leblanc's fridge, Akira stood. He hit the tap and washed his hands, listening to the sound of rain droning over the roof. While it didn't wash away all the summer heat, three days in a row was enough to bring the temperature down to a tolerable level. With the last morning customer long since having departed for the daily grind, Akira's eyes fell on the yellow pay phone and he thought of the last evening with Kawakami. He'd never dared make true long-term plans until Father Motoori because he thought he'd never have a life of his own to live.

Maybe that was why he thought a knife would solve all his problems. Yet now that he had friends to buoy him up and a woman he wanted to spend his life with, he had a conviction which would hound him and everyone connected to him.

"Don't stand around scowling like that," Sojiro snapped from behind the gas stove. "You'll drive away the customers."

Akira glanced around at the empty restaurant. "Fine. I wouldn't want to drive away these crowds and their piles of loot," he snapped back, storming to the entrance. He realized he looked childish and the restaurateur probably didn't mean to drive him away, but by then pride and momentum drove him so he yanked out his umbrella from the can at the front and stepped into the deluge. The rain battered his blue, two-man umbrella for long moments before he let out a long breath. "Nice job, dumbass. So much for being able to ask the man providing you shelter for help."

With his impulsiveness having cut off one option for the day, he wracked his brain for another option. Takemi was close, but besides occasional teasing to distract him she never spoke a word about relationships. She wouldn't want to get involved in his quagmire. Hiromasa was too distant an acquaintance to seek for help. Futaba was inexperienced and had an under-developed sense of boundaries so laying one of his most fragile fears in her hand would most likely lead to inappropriate jokes and broken hearts. Ryuji might be more wordly, but also thought more with his libido than his brain. Maybe Ann and Yusuke? He shot out a text, but got no response from the artist and an automated 'busy at work' from Ann. Same with Yuuki. Makoto was well-read and almost as thoughtful as Hifumi, but had some odd ideas and hadn't been out of her ivory tower for long. He wasn't even certain she liked boys – or girls, for that matter. Who did that leave to counsel…?

Oh. He should have thought of the goof weeks ago. The transfer student headed for the train station and searched through his contacts for Maruki. The phone rang, and rang, then rang some more. Then connected to the sound of heavy breathing and more rain pounding against a glass door. "Ku-Kuru… wait, you preferred Akira-kun." Maruki paused to gulp in another breath. "S-sorry for the delay. You caught me at the library. Is everything all right?"

Akira opened his mouth to spit out the scripted 'fine' when his brain regained the reigns to his tongue. This entire call was because everything was not fine. "I need to talk."

"Oh, yes!" Maruki paced a few steps in what sounded like an entry room. "I'm so sorry if I seem to have been out of contact. I sent you a text on the twenty-fifth, but I guess you were busy. I didn't want to call back too soon and seem pushy, especially when you kids are enjoying your summer break, but I guess I let too much time pass. I've been getting more patients who are scared of the stock market crash Medjed is threatening, and all the information leaks making headlines."

Futaba just starting hacking Medjed's website, but she said she was certain the 'script kiddie' was the only one and he'd be in police custody as soon as she leaked his personal information. "Just people panicking over everyday mistakes. They'll announce their capitulation to the Phantom Thief any day now."

Maruki hummed. "I wish it was that easy to believe, or convince my adult patients. Life has plenty of ups and downs, and sometimes what we think are mountains end up molehills. What is it you wanted to talk about? Er… or should I say where? I'm pretty sure you don't want a counseling session on the phone while I'm standing in the entry hall of a university library."

He was right, and the rain meant they had to find somewhere closed and indoors for both shelter and privacy. "They have private group study rooms?"

Thursday, 18 August 2016
Noon
Chiyoda-ku, Hitotsubashi University

Akira paced to the far corner of the small study room with a white plastic table and walls of pressed bamboo fibers. He took the cushioned folding chair in the far corner and sat as the counselor closed the door and sat down across the table, setting down a binder, notebooks, and a stack of books half his chest high. When it started to tip, the transfer student sighed and stood to catch it.

Maruki fumbled to catch his stack of books and papers, knocking the top book off and sending a dozen handwritten pages scattering. He gathered his notes and sat. "Sorry about that." He straightened his stack so it looked less like the Leaning Tower of Pisa. "I do my best to listen, get a sense of every student and patient's emotional state. But being good at listening has its limits. It's much harder to diagnose and treat pain in… if I may be poetic for a moment… the heart." His gaze drifted around the scattered pages. "Those wounds can be much more complex than physical injuries."

Akira settled in his chair. Talking about someone else's problems was so much easier than his own. "I think that all goes to how much harder it is to diagnose. Pretty hard for a man to say his arm's not broken when it's bent the wrong way."

Maruki nodded with a toothless smile. "Exactly! That's why I'm working so hard at my research. Not being as visible does nothing to diminish hurtful things said to you, or being separated from those you love."

Akira's heart clenched in his chest and he drew back in his seat. "Those things exist in everyone. It's called imperfect life."

The counselor nodded, but the corners of his lips turned down. "I know physical pain is a necessary response to the physical world in which we live. Fever as a response to being out too long in the snow. Swelling in response to falling on your wrist. Life would be better if we didn't have to deal with any of those things."

Akira straightened his glasses. "That can come with its own problems. Congenital analgesia can lead to injury pile-up and early death from failing to catch a developing problem that a fully-functioning nervous system could catch."

"But what about unnecessary pain, like in the heart?"

Akira crossed his arms. "I don't see why those would be any different. Couples who fight but still communicate have more robust relationships than those who disengage."

"But it isn't born from any tangible problem in our bodies," Maruki countered. "So what does a strange and impractical pain in the mind benefit?"

Akira uncrossed his arms, just to fold his hands on the table. "Mind and body are linked."

Maruki's lips turned down. "To a degree, yes. Just like a physician seeks to alleviate physical injury, my research seeks to remove the psychological kind. What makes you feel pain in your heart, Akira-kun?"

The transfer student nodded, his expression solemn. "When Stargate SG-1 is delayed and I have to wait until next week for the show."

Air blew out of Maruki's nose and he gave an unconvincing smile. "Always ready with a joke. But there's very real pain in things like… say, a broken heart." He settled back. "The kind of pain that can only form because we fall in love, right?"

Akira tapped his folded hands against the table once and despite himself he thought of Shiho. "It can also come from seeing others have what you'll never have."

Maruki nodded. "True, even something like the empathy we need to connect with others can result in discomfort."

Akira remembered some of the people on heavy medication regimens at the Smiling Mountain Mental Institute. "We can't cut that out or we cut away what makes us human," Akira said, remembering Father Motoori's sermons. "Father Sugiyama leans a little away from the 'interfering omnipotence' idea some people have of God, but his sermons have included how shared experiences, even ones briefly painful, help people of disparate backgrounds to come together and become a tight-knit community which can then survive hard winters and economic downturns."

Maruki nodded. "That's a very positive way of looking at it. It's a fair assessment, though I still think a life without pain would be better." His gaze turned to his books and notes. "That's what this research is all about, after all." He scratched the back of his neck. "And why I asked you for help."

Akira puffed out his chest to exaggerate recalcitrance. "I am not approving an interest-free loan."

Maruki's eyes widened. "What? That's not—"

"That was a joke," Akira said, slouching.

The counselor gave an awkward laugh. "O-oh. Good one, Akira-kun. Well, you don't have to worry about anything difficult or intrusive in helping out my research."

Akira felt a warning flag pop up in his mind from his time at Smiling Mountain. "You don't know much about medical research in this country, do you?"

"I prefer not to repeat the mistakes of my forebears." Maruki searched through his papers, then stacked a few in order. They questioned and conversed back and forth, most of it sounding like the later years at Smiling Mountain, but some of it sounded a little like project titles he heard under Director Isshiki at Blue Cove.

Thursday, 18 August 2016
Late Afternoon
Chiyoda-ku, Hitotsubashi University

Akira waited for the counselor to finish scribbling as the university's study room blew AC straight on him. The cool reminded him of autumn in Shinjou.

Maruki closed a period at the bottom of the page. "Thank you so much, Akira-kun. You've clearly learned a great deal from all your time around neuro-psychologists." Sharp pen strokes tapped, then he reached for his phone to check a document photo. The counselor's shoulders tensed. "Oh, no! I'm so sorry, Akira-kun. I just used up hours of your time when I came here to help you!"

"It's all right," he tried to wave off. "I, uh… do you remember when you promised to teach me techniques to stay focused in tests, or keep from getting nervous on dates?" His stomach wrenched into a knot.

Maruki gave a smile that lit up too much of his face to be pure placation. "Yes, I did! Have you already advanced that far with your special girl? That's wonderful!"

Akira settled himself in his chair to give himself a beat to collect himself. "Maruki-san, did Shujin not give you a thorough rundown of my long list of 'delinquency'?"

"Principal Kobayakawa gave me the story about your conviction in juvenile court for assault. And reported a verbal altercation between yourself and Coach Kamoshida. The vice principal had some other notes, like a long list of truancy reported by Inuri High School, but your grades didn't seem bad. When I asked for a full history, Kobayakawa told me that was all I needed to know." The counselor rubbed the back of his head. "When I called Inuri, the instant I mentioned your name they said the next conversation we had would be with their lawyers."

Akira grimaced. "I assume you asked by 'Kurusu' and not my name?" He waited for the expected nod. "Yeah, that sounds like what happened to anybody who tried digging into my old… man's past. When you've got friends in the government, nobody wants to touch you." He clenched his hands in his lap, but forced a casual smile. "Red tape is a common allergy."

Maruki responded with a wooden smile. "I'm glad you keep up a sense of humor to it, but… adults should be helping you, even if you've got a turbulent past. You shouldn't just have to accept people trying to pass off problems. That doesn't solve them. There are enough problems with the incongruities between expectations of internal and external reality."

Akira swallowed, feeling hairs standing up. This sounded too much like research at the Institute. "How so?"

Maruki tapped his fingers on the table for a moment, then straightened the book stack a little more. "Everyone has an internal reality. A self they want to be. For most people your age it's wanting to be a model student, or perhaps being loved and relied on."

Akira's teeth pressed together as Hifumi smiled in his mind's eye. His arms tingled just at the memory of being around her, and his heart clenched.

Already on a roll, the counselor continued as if he didn't notice. "The idealized self and the one in the real world are often far apart. That disparity causes a lot of people enormous pain, no matter how much they try. Not everyone can ace every exam. Not everyone is fast or strong enough to be a hero, and even fewer willing to pull a Midoriya and risk hurting themselves on off-chances."

Akira shrugged. "You can either roll over and hope you survive the trampling, or grab life by the horns."

The counselor's smile took a sad tinge. "That kind of a choice shouldn't be necessary. A slight slip-up can put people into dark places."

Akira shrugged. "What if I like the dark? Makes it easy to nap."

Maruki chuffed, but his smile relaxed a bit. "In the interest of full disclosure, I spent some time of my own after Kobayakawa was arrested to look over your information. Get a more complete picture. I contacted your history teacher at Inuri and she said you aced every exam you were present for. And your list of residence addresses spoke a lot more than I think Shujin realized… bouncing between parents who don't live together… I've counseled a child whose parents fought over custody. It's hard on kids tugged back and forth."

Akira took one of the loose pages of handwritten notes and started folding it. "Mine didn't fight over who got to have me." He closed his mouth. Futaba got an explanation, but she needed to know someone had been in that dark place where she was. That day wasn't what he wanted to talk about, anyway. Father Motoori made sure he'd never go back again. "I know this may be hard to believe, but I don't regret leaving them or coming to Tokyo. I'd'a never met Hifumi otherwise." The dark pall left the room and a grin tugged at his mouth.

A beat ticked by as Maruki looked over the transfer student, then adjusted his glasses. "To be able to come out of what happened with that drunk and Kamoshida… That's nothing short of amazing, Akira-kun. You must be made of tougher stuff than iron."

Akira rubbed the back of his neck. The counselor meant it. "Hey, I ain't a roll. Don't butter me up." He scratched. "I'm just a boy."

"She's a woman. And you're a man," Ryuji told him at Tanabata. The thought conjured up Hifumi standing naked on a scallop shell, and he felt his member stiffen.

Akira coughed into his fist, then went back to folding an origami frog. "And… that's part of why I'm here. I talked to Hifumi about my record. We're not going out, but… I can't stop thinking about her. And sometimes not appropriately." He took off his glasses to rub the bridge of his nose. "I blame the jerk who introduced me to her nickname of the Venus of Shogi. She's smart and warm as the dawn and deserves better than to be treated like a sex idol."

One corner of Maruki's lips quirked higher. "I'm sure. But remember what I said the first time? You're a teenager. It's the time of your life when hormones kick in. It could be a bad thing if that was the only way you thought of her. But it's different when it's an inclusive and. It means you're thinking of her whole person. She's a teenager too, what if she thinks the same way?"

Face blazing, Akira slammed his empty right hand on the table, crushing the origami frog. "She's not that kind of girl!"

"Would that in any way reduce her if she was?"

Akira's mouth drifted open, and a tingle crawled up his spine. Mitsuyo's memory of Hifumi locking lips with Kazuma shot through his mind. His heart ached when his mind tried to substitute him in the boy's place, but he couldn't even imagine what it was like to feel a girl's lips on his. "She deserves to be happy. But she can find that with someone else." He settled his glasses back on his face. "It doesn't matter if I want to grow old with her."

Maruki straightened on his seat. "Akira-kun, you're not an exception."

Akira sat against his seat back, thrown for a loop.

Before the boy had a chance to recover his wits, Maruki continued, "Every human being deserves the chance to be loved. And it's natural to be attracted to the person you love." He held out a hand. "I've been hearing a lot about what you want. Which is good, we need to understand ourselves. But our world is a bit wider than the self. What does she want?"

Disappointment shone in her eyes when Akira set Hifumi back on her feet and let go, her first day in the Metaverse. And was there more than frustration at her house after Antalas' barking drove Morgana running in a panic? Or that day in the meditation courtyard at Kanda Catholic Church, did he imagine something more in her eyes before despair overwhelmed her?

No, he had to be projecting. She was beautiful. He was just some guy.

Akira shook his head. "She just wants her mother to be cleared up. Like things used to be."

Maruki nodded, but his eyes lingered on the transfer student, searching. "It's fine to want the good things from our past. But don't push her away because you're scared of a future together."

Akira clenched his hands in his hair. "But thinking of her as… She deserves someone who doesn't fantasize about tearing her clothes off. Mother treated people like playthings, I refuse to be like her."

"You've never done anything she's protested, have you?"

Akira shot straight, but the lewd thoughts he had still brought a guilty blush to his face. "Never!"

"Then don't forget to acknowledge your own honorable conduct." Maruki scribbled something onto a new set of notes. "And wanting to be better than one's parents is a great stance, even if you had good ones. However, it's possible to make a mistake of a different sort by veering too far to the opposite side of a road. Love is a thing that includes things that we would've called 'sharing cooties' when I was in primary school. Just in a proper time and place. I've had other patients who felt guilty about doing something they felt good, but don't forget that if this is such a close relationship, you might make her feel good. Isn't that something to treasure?" His eyes scanned the transfer student as he pondered for a moment in silence. "Have you ever seen 'Journey to the West: Conquering the Demons'?"

Akira began folding another page of notes to give his hands something to do. "I've read Journey to the West. I liked Wukong, but thought every arc was kind of predictable when it always came down to Wukong beating up the demons who captured Sanzang." He turned the in-progress crane to begin folding its wings. "What's this got to do with not wanting to sully Hifumi?"

"You might like this one better," Maruki said as he scribbled a note, then looked up at the boy. "A few of my old friends took me to see it in theaters a couple years ago when I really needed it. It's kind of a comedy which might not be your cup of tea, but Sanzang's enlightenment at the end always stuck with me, when after rejecting Duan time and again as he pursued nirvana, he realized 'There is no greater love, or lesser love. There is just love'."

Akira let his hands keep folding the paper crane, its shape skewed from the notebook paper's rectangular starting shape, but the counselor's words resonated through a hole inside his heart. He crossed his arms. "That's easier to say for people who don't have a trail of blood and tears. I'm already failing to control myself in my own thoughts, what if I do something in real life? I'd… she'd…"

"Your hormones are only part of you, Akira-kun. I think it's abundantly clear you want her to be happy more than anything." Maruki gave a rather practiced smile, something searching in his eyes as he said, "You've got some really smart friends, Akira-kun. And you're pretty sharp, yourself. You're forward-thinking enough to avoid putting yourself in a position where you might do something you might regret. If you can't think though a problem, try it with them. Especially Hifumi, talk to her, and give her a chance to understand what she wants from you, too. You really like helping people. You give generously, especially of your time. You listen, and really think. There's people all over the world looking for someone like you. So the next time you see her, talk to her. Give yourself a chance, and give her one, too." He closed another period. "I'll walk you through some basics before the Dive Response. Sit back, close your eyes, and breathe deep…"

AN: My Hero Academy's been a favorite of mine for a while, but it only started airing in Japan in April so I didn't want to make references to it and accidentally refer to something that hadn't happened as of the time of Daywatch.

I've liked many derivative takes on Journey to the West but Conquering the Demons is probably one of my favorite because it sets the stage for an enlightened Sanzang despite being made in (and probably for) very conservative cultures where sex is unfairly labeled as a dirty thing.

The Dive Response makes use of tricking the body's peripheral nervous system to force reduced respiration and heart rate and induce calm. It involves putting cool water against the eyes and face to trigger an automatic 'slowdown' as if the body was under water and needed to conserve oxygen. Even splashing the face with cool water can help even breathing and slow a racing heart. I learned this trick in a clinic specializing in anxiety and it's something most people can do anywhere, we taught many patients the Dive Response as part of readying for things like job interviews.